Eric/deshred fix

[esemeniuc]

• proxy/src/main.rs: make get_public_ip() trim/validate the ifconfig.me response and return a structured error instead of unwrap() panicking on parse failure.
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs, proxy/src/main.rs: return the actual UDP bound port from start_forwarder_threads() and use it for startup logging and heartbeat registration (so the advertised port matches what was actually bound).
• proxy/src/server.rs: keep gRPC clients connected if they fall behind by handling broadcast::RecvError::Lagged (skip missed entries and continue streaming) instead of terminating the stream.
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs: fix dedup so duplicates are actually dropped (mark Packet.meta.discard and filter discarded packets out of forwarding, TraceShred latency logging, and reconstruction enqueue).
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs: dedup using only the expected shred payload bytes (dedup_key_slice), ignoring any trailing packet bytes so the same shred can’t bypass dedup via padding/garbage.
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs: avoid cloning PacketBatch for reconstruction; enqueue the already-processed batch at the end of the forward path.
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs: add a bounded reconstruction queue with explicit drop accounting when full, plus queue visibility metrics (len/hi-watermark, queue delay avg/max, batch processing avg/max).
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs: fix forward/fail/duplicate metric accounting (don’t scale duplicate counts by destination sends; count partial batch_send failures correctly).
• proxy/src/deshred.rs: rework reconstruction state to use BitVec for seen/data-complete/recovered/deshredded tracking and reduce per-slot memory/iteration overhead.
• proxy/src/deshred.rs: key FEC recovery state by (fec_set_index, version, leader signature) and store coding shreds by position to avoid mixing conflicting erasure batches and to reduce repeated recovery work.
• proxy/src/deshred.rs: add slot-window filtering around a per-batch median “slot anchor” (mitigates outlier slot poisoning), plus eviction of out-of-window slots when state grows too large (with missed-FEC-set logging).
• proxy/src/deshred.rs: improve unknown-start handling (emit best-effort decodes once per boundary, sanity-check them, and don’t commit/drop payloads until a known boundary arrives)
• proxy/src/deshred.rs: cap bincode decode size and use allow_trailing_bytes so padding/back-compat cases don’t break decoding while avoiding pathological payloads.
• proxy/src/forwarder.rs, proxy/src/deshred.rs: expand tests for trailing-bytes behavior, bytes-only mode, unknown-start semantics, slot poisoning, and make UDP tests sandbox-friendly (ephemeral binds / skip on PermissionDenied).