diff --git a/frequency.py b/frequency.py
index 68be559..d0f335b 100644
--- a/frequency.py
+++ b/frequency.py
@@ -2,18 +2,31 @@
 Project Gutenberg """
 
 import string
+from collections import Counter
 
-
-def get_word_list(file_name):
+def get_word_list(filename):
     """ Reads the specified project Gutenberg book.  Header comments,
     punctuation, and whitespace are stripped away.  The function
     returns a list of the words used in the book as a list.
     All words are converted to lower case.
     """
-    pass
+    f = open(filename, 'r')
+    lines = f.readlines()
+    curr_line = 0
+    while lines[curr_line].find('START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK') == -1:
+        curr_line += 1
+    lines = lines[curr_line+1:]
+    word_list = []
+    for line in lines:
+        for word in line.split():
+            for character in string.punctuation:
+                word = word.replace(character,'')
+            word = word.lower()
+            word_list.append(word)
+    return word_list
 
 
-def get_top_n_words(word_list, n):
+def get_top_n_words(word_list,n):
     """ Takes a list of words as input and returns a list of the n most frequently
     occurring words ordered from most to least frequently occurring.
 
@@ -23,8 +36,15 @@ def get_top_n_words(word_list, n):
     returns: a list of n most frequently occurring words ordered from most
     frequently to least frequentlyoccurring
     """
-    pass
+    words = Counter(word_list)
+    top_n = words.most_common(n)
+    return top_n
+
+
+def main():
+    word_list = get_word_list('pg1661.txt')
+    print(get_top_n_words(word_list,10))
+
 
 if __name__ == "__main__":
-    print("Running WordFrequency Toolbox")
-    print(string.punctuation)
+    main()
diff --git a/pg1661.txt b/pg1661.txt
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c4c3130
--- /dev/null
+++ b/pg1661.txt
@@ -0,0 +1,13052 @@
+Project Gutenberg's The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, by Arthur Conan Doyle
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net
+
+
+Title: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
+
+Author: Arthur Conan Doyle
+
+Posting Date: April 18, 2011 [EBook #1661]
+First Posted: November 29, 2002
+
+Language: English
+
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE ADVENTURES OF SHERLOCK HOLMES ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by an anonymous Project Gutenberg volunteer and Jose Menendez
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+THE ADVENTURES OF SHERLOCK HOLMES
+
+by
+
+SIR ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE
+
+
+
+   I. A Scandal in Bohemia
+  II. The Red-headed League
+ III. A Case of Identity
+  IV. The Boscombe Valley Mystery
+   V. The Five Orange Pips
+  VI. The Man with the Twisted Lip
+ VII. The Adventure of the Blue Carbuncle
+VIII. The Adventure of the Speckled Band
+  IX. The Adventure of the Engineer's Thumb
+   X. The Adventure of the Noble Bachelor
+  XI. The Adventure of the Beryl Coronet
+ XII. The Adventure of the Copper Beeches
+
+
+
+
+ADVENTURE I. A SCANDAL IN BOHEMIA
+
+I.
+
+To Sherlock Holmes she is always THE woman. I have seldom heard
+him mention her under any other name. In his eyes she eclipses
+and predominates the whole of her sex. It was not that he felt
+any emotion akin to love for Irene Adler. All emotions, and that
+one particularly, were abhorrent to his cold, precise but
+admirably balanced mind. He was, I take it, the most perfect
+reasoning and observing machine that the world has seen, but as a
+lover he would have placed himself in a false position. He never
+spoke of the softer passions, save with a gibe and a sneer. They
+were admirable things for the observer--excellent for drawing the
+veil from men's motives and actions. But for the trained reasoner
+to admit such intrusions into his own delicate and finely
+adjusted temperament was to introduce a distracting factor which
+might throw a doubt upon all his mental results. Grit in a
+sensitive instrument, or a crack in one of his own high-power
+lenses, would not be more disturbing than a strong emotion in a
+nature such as his. And yet there was but one woman to him, and
+that woman was the late Irene Adler, of dubious and questionable
+memory.
+
+I had seen little of Holmes lately. My marriage had drifted us
+away from each other. My own complete happiness, and the
+home-centred interests which rise up around the man who first
+finds himself master of his own establishment, were sufficient to
+absorb all my attention, while Holmes, who loathed every form of
+society with his whole Bohemian soul, remained in our lodgings in
+Baker Street, buried among his old books, and alternating from
+week to week between cocaine and ambition, the drowsiness of the
+drug, and the fierce energy of his own keen nature. He was still,
+as ever, deeply attracted by the study of crime, and occupied his
+immense faculties and extraordinary powers of observation in
+following out those clues, and clearing up those mysteries which
+had been abandoned as hopeless by the official police. From time
+to time I heard some vague account of his doings: of his summons
+to Odessa in the case of the Trepoff murder, of his clearing up
+of the singular tragedy of the Atkinson brothers at Trincomalee,
+and finally of the mission which he had accomplished so
+delicately and successfully for the reigning family of Holland.
+Beyond these signs of his activity, however, which I merely
+shared with all the readers of the daily press, I knew little of
+my former friend and companion.
+
+One night--it was on the twentieth of March, 1888--I was
+returning from a journey to a patient (for I had now returned to
+civil practice), when my way led me through Baker Street. As I
+passed the well-remembered door, which must always be associated
+in my mind with my wooing, and with the dark incidents of the
+Study in Scarlet, I was seized with a keen desire to see Holmes
+again, and to know how he was employing his extraordinary powers.
+His rooms were brilliantly lit, and, even as I looked up, I saw
+his tall, spare figure pass twice in a dark silhouette against
+the blind. He was pacing the room swiftly, eagerly, with his head
+sunk upon his chest and his hands clasped behind him. To me, who
+knew his every mood and habit, his attitude and manner told their
+own story. He was at work again. He had risen out of his
+drug-created dreams and was hot upon the scent of some new
+problem. I rang the bell and was shown up to the chamber which
+had formerly been in part my own.
+
+His manner was not effusive. It seldom was; but he was glad, I
+think, to see me. With hardly a word spoken, but with a kindly
+eye, he waved me to an armchair, threw across his case of cigars,
+and indicated a spirit case and a gasogene in the corner. Then he
+stood before the fire and looked me over in his singular
+introspective fashion.
+
+"Wedlock suits you," he remarked. "I think, Watson, that you have
+put on seven and a half pounds since I saw you."
+
+"Seven!" I answered.
+
+"Indeed, I should have thought a little more. Just a trifle more,
+I fancy, Watson. And in practice again, I observe. You did not
+tell me that you intended to go into harness."
+
+"Then, how do you know?"
+
+"I see it, I deduce it. How do I know that you have been getting
+yourself very wet lately, and that you have a most clumsy and
+careless servant girl?"
+
+"My dear Holmes," said I, "this is too much. You would certainly
+have been burned, had you lived a few centuries ago. It is true
+that I had a country walk on Thursday and came home in a dreadful
+mess, but as I have changed my clothes I can't imagine how you
+deduce it. As to Mary Jane, she is incorrigible, and my wife has
+given her notice, but there, again, I fail to see how you work it
+out."
+
+He chuckled to himself and rubbed his long, nervous hands
+together.
+
+"It is simplicity itself," said he; "my eyes tell me that on the
+inside of your left shoe, just where the firelight strikes it,
+the leather is scored by six almost parallel cuts. Obviously they
+have been caused by someone who has very carelessly scraped round
+the edges of the sole in order to remove crusted mud from it.
+Hence, you see, my double deduction that you had been out in vile
+weather, and that you had a particularly malignant boot-slitting
+specimen of the London slavey. As to your practice, if a
+gentleman walks into my rooms smelling of iodoform, with a black
+mark of nitrate of silver upon his right forefinger, and a bulge
+on the right side of his top-hat to show where he has secreted
+his stethoscope, I must be dull, indeed, if I do not pronounce
+him to be an active member of the medical profession."
+
+I could not help laughing at the ease with which he explained his
+process of deduction. "When I hear you give your reasons," I
+remarked, "the thing always appears to me to be so ridiculously
+simple that I could easily do it myself, though at each
+successive instance of your reasoning I am baffled until you
+explain your process. And yet I believe that my eyes are as good
+as yours."
+
+"Quite so," he answered, lighting a cigarette, and throwing
+himself down into an armchair. "You see, but you do not observe.
+The distinction is clear. For example, you have frequently seen
+the steps which lead up from the hall to this room."
+
+"Frequently."
+
+"How often?"
+
+"Well, some hundreds of times."
+
+"Then how many are there?"
+
+"How many? I don't know."
+
+"Quite so! You have not observed. And yet you have seen. That is
+just my point. Now, I know that there are seventeen steps,
+because I have both seen and observed. By-the-way, since you are
+interested in these little problems, and since you are good
+enough to chronicle one or two of my trifling experiences, you
+may be interested in this." He threw over a sheet of thick,
+pink-tinted note-paper which had been lying open upon the table.
+"It came by the last post," said he. "Read it aloud."
+
+The note was undated, and without either signature or address.
+
+"There will call upon you to-night, at a quarter to eight
+o'clock," it said, "a gentleman who desires to consult you upon a
+matter of the very deepest moment. Your recent services to one of
+the royal houses of Europe have shown that you are one who may
+safely be trusted with matters which are of an importance which
+can hardly be exaggerated. This account of you we have from all
+quarters received. Be in your chamber then at that hour, and do
+not take it amiss if your visitor wear a mask."
+
+"This is indeed a mystery," I remarked. "What do you imagine that
+it means?"
+
+"I have no data yet. It is a capital mistake to theorize before
+one has data. Insensibly one begins to twist facts to suit
+theories, instead of theories to suit facts. But the note itself.
+What do you deduce from it?"
+
+I carefully examined the writing, and the paper upon which it was
+written.
+
+"The man who wrote it was presumably well to do," I remarked,
+endeavouring to imitate my companion's processes. "Such paper
+could not be bought under half a crown a packet. It is peculiarly
+strong and stiff."
+
+"Peculiar--that is the very word," said Holmes. "It is not an
+English paper at all. Hold it up to the light."
+
+I did so, and saw a large "E" with a small "g," a "P," and a
+large "G" with a small "t" woven into the texture of the paper.
+
+"What do you make of that?" asked Holmes.
+
+"The name of the maker, no doubt; or his monogram, rather."
+
+"Not at all. The 'G' with the small 't' stands for
+'Gesellschaft,' which is the German for 'Company.' It is a
+customary contraction like our 'Co.' 'P,' of course, stands for
+'Papier.' Now for the 'Eg.' Let us glance at our Continental
+Gazetteer." He took down a heavy brown volume from his shelves.
+"Eglow, Eglonitz--here we are, Egria. It is in a German-speaking
+country--in Bohemia, not far from Carlsbad. 'Remarkable as being
+the scene of the death of Wallenstein, and for its numerous
+glass-factories and paper-mills.' Ha, ha, my boy, what do you
+make of that?" His eyes sparkled, and he sent up a great blue
+triumphant cloud from his cigarette.
+
+"The paper was made in Bohemia," I said.
+
+"Precisely. And the man who wrote the note is a German. Do you
+note the peculiar construction of the sentence--'This account of
+you we have from all quarters received.' A Frenchman or Russian
+could not have written that. It is the German who is so
+uncourteous to his verbs. It only remains, therefore, to discover
+what is wanted by this German who writes upon Bohemian paper and
+prefers wearing a mask to showing his face. And here he comes, if
+I am not mistaken, to resolve all our doubts."
+
+As he spoke there was the sharp sound of horses' hoofs and
+grating wheels against the curb, followed by a sharp pull at the
+bell. Holmes whistled.
+
+"A pair, by the sound," said he. "Yes," he continued, glancing
+out of the window. "A nice little brougham and a pair of
+beauties. A hundred and fifty guineas apiece. There's money in
+this case, Watson, if there is nothing else."
+
+"I think that I had better go, Holmes."
+
+"Not a bit, Doctor. Stay where you are. I am lost without my
+Boswell. And this promises to be interesting. It would be a pity
+to miss it."
+
+"But your client--"
+
+"Never mind him. I may want your help, and so may he. Here he
+comes. Sit down in that armchair, Doctor, and give us your best
+attention."
+
+A slow and heavy step, which had been heard upon the stairs and
+in the passage, paused immediately outside the door. Then there
+was a loud and authoritative tap.
+
+"Come in!" said Holmes.
+
+A man entered who could hardly have been less than six feet six
+inches in height, with the chest and limbs of a Hercules. His
+dress was rich with a richness which would, in England, be looked
+upon as akin to bad taste. Heavy bands of astrakhan were slashed
+across the sleeves and fronts of his double-breasted coat, while
+the deep blue cloak which was thrown over his shoulders was lined
+with flame-coloured silk and secured at the neck with a brooch
+which consisted of a single flaming beryl. Boots which extended
+halfway up his calves, and which were trimmed at the tops with
+rich brown fur, completed the impression of barbaric opulence
+which was suggested by his whole appearance. He carried a
+broad-brimmed hat in his hand, while he wore across the upper
+part of his face, extending down past the cheekbones, a black
+vizard mask, which he had apparently adjusted that very moment,
+for his hand was still raised to it as he entered. From the lower
+part of the face he appeared to be a man of strong character,
+with a thick, hanging lip, and a long, straight chin suggestive
+of resolution pushed to the length of obstinacy.
+
+"You had my note?" he asked with a deep harsh voice and a
+strongly marked German accent. "I told you that I would call." He
+looked from one to the other of us, as if uncertain which to
+address.
+
+"Pray take a seat," said Holmes. "This is my friend and
+colleague, Dr. Watson, who is occasionally good enough to help me
+in my cases. Whom have I the honour to address?"
+
+"You may address me as the Count Von Kramm, a Bohemian nobleman.
+I understand that this gentleman, your friend, is a man of honour
+and discretion, whom I may trust with a matter of the most
+extreme importance. If not, I should much prefer to communicate
+with you alone."
+
+I rose to go, but Holmes caught me by the wrist and pushed me
+back into my chair. "It is both, or none," said he. "You may say
+before this gentleman anything which you may say to me."
+
+The Count shrugged his broad shoulders. "Then I must begin," said
+he, "by binding you both to absolute secrecy for two years; at
+the end of that time the matter will be of no importance. At
+present it is not too much to say that it is of such weight it
+may have an influence upon European history."
+
+"I promise," said Holmes.
+
+"And I."
+
+"You will excuse this mask," continued our strange visitor. "The
+august person who employs me wishes his agent to be unknown to
+you, and I may confess at once that the title by which I have
+just called myself is not exactly my own."
+
+"I was aware of it," said Holmes dryly.
+
+"The circumstances are of great delicacy, and every precaution
+has to be taken to quench what might grow to be an immense
+scandal and seriously compromise one of the reigning families of
+Europe. To speak plainly, the matter implicates the great House
+of Ormstein, hereditary kings of Bohemia."
+
+"I was also aware of that," murmured Holmes, settling himself
+down in his armchair and closing his eyes.
+
+Our visitor glanced with some apparent surprise at the languid,
+lounging figure of the man who had been no doubt depicted to him
+as the most incisive reasoner and most energetic agent in Europe.
+Holmes slowly reopened his eyes and looked impatiently at his
+gigantic client.
+
+"If your Majesty would condescend to state your case," he
+remarked, "I should be better able to advise you."
+
+The man sprang from his chair and paced up and down the room in
+uncontrollable agitation. Then, with a gesture of desperation, he
+tore the mask from his face and hurled it upon the ground. "You
+are right," he cried; "I am the King. Why should I attempt to
+conceal it?"
+
+"Why, indeed?" murmured Holmes. "Your Majesty had not spoken
+before I was aware that I was addressing Wilhelm Gottsreich
+Sigismond von Ormstein, Grand Duke of Cassel-Felstein, and
+hereditary King of Bohemia."
+
+"But you can understand," said our strange visitor, sitting down
+once more and passing his hand over his high white forehead, "you
+can understand that I am not accustomed to doing such business in
+my own person. Yet the matter was so delicate that I could not
+confide it to an agent without putting myself in his power. I
+have come incognito from Prague for the purpose of consulting
+you."
+
+"Then, pray consult," said Holmes, shutting his eyes once more.
+
+"The facts are briefly these: Some five years ago, during a
+lengthy visit to Warsaw, I made the acquaintance of the well-known
+adventuress, Irene Adler. The name is no doubt familiar to you."
+
+"Kindly look her up in my index, Doctor," murmured Holmes without
+opening his eyes. For many years he had adopted a system of
+docketing all paragraphs concerning men and things, so that it
+was difficult to name a subject or a person on which he could not
+at once furnish information. In this case I found her biography
+sandwiched in between that of a Hebrew rabbi and that of a
+staff-commander who had written a monograph upon the deep-sea
+fishes.
+
+"Let me see!" said Holmes. "Hum! Born in New Jersey in the year
+1858. Contralto--hum! La Scala, hum! Prima donna Imperial Opera
+of Warsaw--yes! Retired from operatic stage--ha! Living in
+London--quite so! Your Majesty, as I understand, became entangled
+with this young person, wrote her some compromising letters, and
+is now desirous of getting those letters back."
+
+"Precisely so. But how--"
+
+"Was there a secret marriage?"
+
+"None."
+
+"No legal papers or certificates?"
+
+"None."
+
+"Then I fail to follow your Majesty. If this young person should
+produce her letters for blackmailing or other purposes, how is
+she to prove their authenticity?"
+
+"There is the writing."
+
+"Pooh, pooh! Forgery."
+
+"My private note-paper."
+
+"Stolen."
+
+"My own seal."
+
+"Imitated."
+
+"My photograph."
+
+"Bought."
+
+"We were both in the photograph."
+
+"Oh, dear! That is very bad! Your Majesty has indeed committed an
+indiscretion."
+
+"I was mad--insane."
+
+"You have compromised yourself seriously."
+
+"I was only Crown Prince then. I was young. I am but thirty now."
+
+"It must be recovered."
+
+"We have tried and failed."
+
+"Your Majesty must pay. It must be bought."
+
+"She will not sell."
+
+"Stolen, then."
+
+"Five attempts have been made. Twice burglars in my pay ransacked
+her house. Once we diverted her luggage when she travelled. Twice
+she has been waylaid. There has been no result."
+
+"No sign of it?"
+
+"Absolutely none."
+
+Holmes laughed. "It is quite a pretty little problem," said he.
+
+"But a very serious one to me," returned the King reproachfully.
+
+"Very, indeed. And what does she propose to do with the
+photograph?"
+
+"To ruin me."
+
+"But how?"
+
+"I am about to be married."
+
+"So I have heard."
+
+"To Clotilde Lothman von Saxe-Meningen, second daughter of the
+King of Scandinavia. You may know the strict principles of her
+family. She is herself the very soul of delicacy. A shadow of a
+doubt as to my conduct would bring the matter to an end."
+
+"And Irene Adler?"
+
+"Threatens to send them the photograph. And she will do it. I
+know that she will do it. You do not know her, but she has a soul
+of steel. She has the face of the most beautiful of women, and
+the mind of the most resolute of men. Rather than I should marry
+another woman, there are no lengths to which she would not
+go--none."
+
+"You are sure that she has not sent it yet?"
+
+"I am sure."
+
+"And why?"
+
+"Because she has said that she would send it on the day when the
+betrothal was publicly proclaimed. That will be next Monday."
+
+"Oh, then we have three days yet," said Holmes with a yawn. "That
+is very fortunate, as I have one or two matters of importance to
+look into just at present. Your Majesty will, of course, stay in
+London for the present?"
+
+"Certainly. You will find me at the Langham under the name of the
+Count Von Kramm."
+
+"Then I shall drop you a line to let you know how we progress."
+
+"Pray do so. I shall be all anxiety."
+
+"Then, as to money?"
+
+"You have carte blanche."
+
+"Absolutely?"
+
+"I tell you that I would give one of the provinces of my kingdom
+to have that photograph."
+
+"And for present expenses?"
+
+The King took a heavy chamois leather bag from under his cloak
+and laid it on the table.
+
+"There are three hundred pounds in gold and seven hundred in
+notes," he said.
+
+Holmes scribbled a receipt upon a sheet of his note-book and
+handed it to him.
+
+"And Mademoiselle's address?" he asked.
+
+"Is Briony Lodge, Serpentine Avenue, St. John's Wood."
+
+Holmes took a note of it. "One other question," said he. "Was the
+photograph a cabinet?"
+
+"It was."
+
+"Then, good-night, your Majesty, and I trust that we shall soon
+have some good news for you. And good-night, Watson," he added,
+as the wheels of the royal brougham rolled down the street. "If
+you will be good enough to call to-morrow afternoon at three
+o'clock I should like to chat this little matter over with you."
+
+
+II.
+
+At three o'clock precisely I was at Baker Street, but Holmes had
+not yet returned. The landlady informed me that he had left the
+house shortly after eight o'clock in the morning. I sat down
+beside the fire, however, with the intention of awaiting him,
+however long he might be. I was already deeply interested in his
+inquiry, for, though it was surrounded by none of the grim and
+strange features which were associated with the two crimes which
+I have already recorded, still, the nature of the case and the
+exalted station of his client gave it a character of its own.
+Indeed, apart from the nature of the investigation which my
+friend had on hand, there was something in his masterly grasp of
+a situation, and his keen, incisive reasoning, which made it a
+pleasure to me to study his system of work, and to follow the
+quick, subtle methods by which he disentangled the most
+inextricable mysteries. So accustomed was I to his invariable
+success that the very possibility of his failing had ceased to
+enter into my head.
+
+It was close upon four before the door opened, and a
+drunken-looking groom, ill-kempt and side-whiskered, with an
+inflamed face and disreputable clothes, walked into the room.
+Accustomed as I was to my friend's amazing powers in the use of
+disguises, I had to look three times before I was certain that it
+was indeed he. With a nod he vanished into the bedroom, whence he
+emerged in five minutes tweed-suited and respectable, as of old.
+Putting his hands into his pockets, he stretched out his legs in
+front of the fire and laughed heartily for some minutes.
+
+"Well, really!" he cried, and then he choked and laughed again
+until he was obliged to lie back, limp and helpless, in the
+chair.
+
+"What is it?"
+
+"It's quite too funny. I am sure you could never guess how I
+employed my morning, or what I ended by doing."
+
+"I can't imagine. I suppose that you have been watching the
+habits, and perhaps the house, of Miss Irene Adler."
+
+"Quite so; but the sequel was rather unusual. I will tell you,
+however. I left the house a little after eight o'clock this
+morning in the character of a groom out of work. There is a
+wonderful sympathy and freemasonry among horsey men. Be one of
+them, and you will know all that there is to know. I soon found
+Briony Lodge. It is a bijou villa, with a garden at the back, but
+built out in front right up to the road, two stories. Chubb lock
+to the door. Large sitting-room on the right side, well
+furnished, with long windows almost to the floor, and those
+preposterous English window fasteners which a child could open.
+Behind there was nothing remarkable, save that the passage window
+could be reached from the top of the coach-house. I walked round
+it and examined it closely from every point of view, but without
+noting anything else of interest.
+
+"I then lounged down the street and found, as I expected, that
+there was a mews in a lane which runs down by one wall of the
+garden. I lent the ostlers a hand in rubbing down their horses,
+and received in exchange twopence, a glass of half and half, two
+fills of shag tobacco, and as much information as I could desire
+about Miss Adler, to say nothing of half a dozen other people in
+the neighbourhood in whom I was not in the least interested, but
+whose biographies I was compelled to listen to."
+
+"And what of Irene Adler?" I asked.
+
+"Oh, she has turned all the men's heads down in that part. She is
+the daintiest thing under a bonnet on this planet. So say the
+Serpentine-mews, to a man. She lives quietly, sings at concerts,
+drives out at five every day, and returns at seven sharp for
+dinner. Seldom goes out at other times, except when she sings.
+Has only one male visitor, but a good deal of him. He is dark,
+handsome, and dashing, never calls less than once a day, and
+often twice. He is a Mr. Godfrey Norton, of the Inner Temple. See
+the advantages of a cabman as a confidant. They had driven him
+home a dozen times from Serpentine-mews, and knew all about him.
+When I had listened to all they had to tell, I began to walk up
+and down near Briony Lodge once more, and to think over my plan
+of campaign.
+
+"This Godfrey Norton was evidently an important factor in the
+matter. He was a lawyer. That sounded ominous. What was the
+relation between them, and what the object of his repeated
+visits? Was she his client, his friend, or his mistress? If the
+former, she had probably transferred the photograph to his
+keeping. If the latter, it was less likely. On the issue of this
+question depended whether I should continue my work at Briony
+Lodge, or turn my attention to the gentleman's chambers in the
+Temple. It was a delicate point, and it widened the field of my
+inquiry. I fear that I bore you with these details, but I have to
+let you see my little difficulties, if you are to understand the
+situation."
+
+"I am following you closely," I answered.
+
+"I was still balancing the matter in my mind when a hansom cab
+drove up to Briony Lodge, and a gentleman sprang out. He was a
+remarkably handsome man, dark, aquiline, and moustached--evidently
+the man of whom I had heard. He appeared to be in a
+great hurry, shouted to the cabman to wait, and brushed past the
+maid who opened the door with the air of a man who was thoroughly
+at home.
+
+"He was in the house about half an hour, and I could catch
+glimpses of him in the windows of the sitting-room, pacing up and
+down, talking excitedly, and waving his arms. Of her I could see
+nothing. Presently he emerged, looking even more flurried than
+before. As he stepped up to the cab, he pulled a gold watch from
+his pocket and looked at it earnestly, 'Drive like the devil,' he
+shouted, 'first to Gross & Hankey's in Regent Street, and then to
+the Church of St. Monica in the Edgeware Road. Half a guinea if
+you do it in twenty minutes!'
+
+"Away they went, and I was just wondering whether I should not do
+well to follow them when up the lane came a neat little landau,
+the coachman with his coat only half-buttoned, and his tie under
+his ear, while all the tags of his harness were sticking out of
+the buckles. It hadn't pulled up before she shot out of the hall
+door and into it. I only caught a glimpse of her at the moment,
+but she was a lovely woman, with a face that a man might die for.
+
+"'The Church of St. Monica, John,' she cried, 'and half a
+sovereign if you reach it in twenty minutes.'
+
+"This was quite too good to lose, Watson. I was just balancing
+whether I should run for it, or whether I should perch behind her
+landau when a cab came through the street. The driver looked
+twice at such a shabby fare, but I jumped in before he could
+object. 'The Church of St. Monica,' said I, 'and half a sovereign
+if you reach it in twenty minutes.' It was twenty-five minutes to
+twelve, and of course it was clear enough what was in the wind.
+
+"My cabby drove fast. I don't think I ever drove faster, but the
+others were there before us. The cab and the landau with their
+steaming horses were in front of the door when I arrived. I paid
+the man and hurried into the church. There was not a soul there
+save the two whom I had followed and a surpliced clergyman, who
+seemed to be expostulating with them. They were all three
+standing in a knot in front of the altar. I lounged up the side
+aisle like any other idler who has dropped into a church.
+Suddenly, to my surprise, the three at the altar faced round to
+me, and Godfrey Norton came running as hard as he could towards
+me.
+
+"'Thank God,' he cried. 'You'll do. Come! Come!'
+
+"'What then?' I asked.
+
+"'Come, man, come, only three minutes, or it won't be legal.'
+
+"I was half-dragged up to the altar, and before I knew where I was
+I found myself mumbling responses which were whispered in my ear,
+and vouching for things of which I knew nothing, and generally
+assisting in the secure tying up of Irene Adler, spinster, to
+Godfrey Norton, bachelor. It was all done in an instant, and
+there was the gentleman thanking me on the one side and the lady
+on the other, while the clergyman beamed on me in front. It was
+the most preposterous position in which I ever found myself in my
+life, and it was the thought of it that started me laughing just
+now. It seems that there had been some informality about their
+license, that the clergyman absolutely refused to marry them
+without a witness of some sort, and that my lucky appearance
+saved the bridegroom from having to sally out into the streets in
+search of a best man. The bride gave me a sovereign, and I mean
+to wear it on my watch-chain in memory of the occasion."
+
+"This is a very unexpected turn of affairs," said I; "and what
+then?"
+
+"Well, I found my plans very seriously menaced. It looked as if
+the pair might take an immediate departure, and so necessitate
+very prompt and energetic measures on my part. At the church
+door, however, they separated, he driving back to the Temple, and
+she to her own house. 'I shall drive out in the park at five as
+usual,' she said as she left him. I heard no more. They drove
+away in different directions, and I went off to make my own
+arrangements."
+
+"Which are?"
+
+"Some cold beef and a glass of beer," he answered, ringing the
+bell. "I have been too busy to think of food, and I am likely to
+be busier still this evening. By the way, Doctor, I shall want
+your co-operation."
+
+"I shall be delighted."
+
+"You don't mind breaking the law?"
+
+"Not in the least."
+
+"Nor running a chance of arrest?"
+
+"Not in a good cause."
+
+"Oh, the cause is excellent!"
+
+"Then I am your man."
+
+"I was sure that I might rely on you."
+
+"But what is it you wish?"
+
+"When Mrs. Turner has brought in the tray I will make it clear to
+you. Now," he said as he turned hungrily on the simple fare that
+our landlady had provided, "I must discuss it while I eat, for I
+have not much time. It is nearly five now. In two hours we must
+be on the scene of action. Miss Irene, or Madame, rather, returns
+from her drive at seven. We must be at Briony Lodge to meet her."
+
+"And what then?"
+
+"You must leave that to me. I have already arranged what is to
+occur. There is only one point on which I must insist. You must
+not interfere, come what may. You understand?"
+
+"I am to be neutral?"
+
+"To do nothing whatever. There will probably be some small
+unpleasantness. Do not join in it. It will end in my being
+conveyed into the house. Four or five minutes afterwards the
+sitting-room window will open. You are to station yourself close
+to that open window."
+
+"Yes."
+
+"You are to watch me, for I will be visible to you."
+
+"Yes."
+
+"And when I raise my hand--so--you will throw into the room what
+I give you to throw, and will, at the same time, raise the cry of
+fire. You quite follow me?"
+
+"Entirely."
+
+"It is nothing very formidable," he said, taking a long cigar-shaped
+roll from his pocket. "It is an ordinary plumber's smoke-rocket,
+fitted with a cap at either end to make it self-lighting.
+Your task is confined to that. When you raise your cry of fire,
+it will be taken up by quite a number of people. You may then
+walk to the end of the street, and I will rejoin you in ten
+minutes. I hope that I have made myself clear?"
+
+"I am to remain neutral, to get near the window, to watch you,
+and at the signal to throw in this object, then to raise the cry
+of fire, and to wait you at the corner of the street."
+
+"Precisely."
+
+"Then you may entirely rely on me."
+
+"That is excellent. I think, perhaps, it is almost time that I
+prepare for the new role I have to play."
+
+He disappeared into his bedroom and returned in a few minutes in
+the character of an amiable and simple-minded Nonconformist
+clergyman. His broad black hat, his baggy trousers, his white
+tie, his sympathetic smile, and general look of peering and
+benevolent curiosity were such as Mr. John Hare alone could have
+equalled. It was not merely that Holmes changed his costume. His
+expression, his manner, his very soul seemed to vary with every
+fresh part that he assumed. The stage lost a fine actor, even as
+science lost an acute reasoner, when he became a specialist in
+crime.
+
+It was a quarter past six when we left Baker Street, and it still
+wanted ten minutes to the hour when we found ourselves in
+Serpentine Avenue. It was already dusk, and the lamps were just
+being lighted as we paced up and down in front of Briony Lodge,
+waiting for the coming of its occupant. The house was just such
+as I had pictured it from Sherlock Holmes' succinct description,
+but the locality appeared to be less private than I expected. On
+the contrary, for a small street in a quiet neighbourhood, it was
+remarkably animated. There was a group of shabbily dressed men
+smoking and laughing in a corner, a scissors-grinder with his
+wheel, two guardsmen who were flirting with a nurse-girl, and
+several well-dressed young men who were lounging up and down with
+cigars in their mouths.
+
+"You see," remarked Holmes, as we paced to and fro in front of
+the house, "this marriage rather simplifies matters. The
+photograph becomes a double-edged weapon now. The chances are
+that she would be as averse to its being seen by Mr. Godfrey
+Norton, as our client is to its coming to the eyes of his
+princess. Now the question is, Where are we to find the
+photograph?"
+
+"Where, indeed?"
+
+"It is most unlikely that she carries it about with her. It is
+cabinet size. Too large for easy concealment about a woman's
+dress. She knows that the King is capable of having her waylaid
+and searched. Two attempts of the sort have already been made. We
+may take it, then, that she does not carry it about with her."
+
+"Where, then?"
+
+"Her banker or her lawyer. There is that double possibility. But
+I am inclined to think neither. Women are naturally secretive,
+and they like to do their own secreting. Why should she hand it
+over to anyone else? She could trust her own guardianship, but
+she could not tell what indirect or political influence might be
+brought to bear upon a business man. Besides, remember that she
+had resolved to use it within a few days. It must be where she
+can lay her hands upon it. It must be in her own house."
+
+"But it has twice been burgled."
+
+"Pshaw! They did not know how to look."
+
+"But how will you look?"
+
+"I will not look."
+
+"What then?"
+
+"I will get her to show me."
+
+"But she will refuse."
+
+"She will not be able to. But I hear the rumble of wheels. It is
+her carriage. Now carry out my orders to the letter."
+
+As he spoke the gleam of the side-lights of a carriage came round
+the curve of the avenue. It was a smart little landau which
+rattled up to the door of Briony Lodge. As it pulled up, one of
+the loafing men at the corner dashed forward to open the door in
+the hope of earning a copper, but was elbowed away by another
+loafer, who had rushed up with the same intention. A fierce
+quarrel broke out, which was increased by the two guardsmen, who
+took sides with one of the loungers, and by the scissors-grinder,
+who was equally hot upon the other side. A blow was struck, and
+in an instant the lady, who had stepped from her carriage, was
+the centre of a little knot of flushed and struggling men, who
+struck savagely at each other with their fists and sticks. Holmes
+dashed into the crowd to protect the lady; but just as he reached
+her he gave a cry and dropped to the ground, with the blood
+running freely down his face. At his fall the guardsmen took to
+their heels in one direction and the loungers in the other, while
+a number of better-dressed people, who had watched the scuffle
+without taking part in it, crowded in to help the lady and to
+attend to the injured man. Irene Adler, as I will still call her,
+had hurried up the steps; but she stood at the top with her
+superb figure outlined against the lights of the hall, looking
+back into the street.
+
+"Is the poor gentleman much hurt?" she asked.
+
+"He is dead," cried several voices.
+
+"No, no, there's life in him!" shouted another. "But he'll be
+gone before you can get him to hospital."
+
+"He's a brave fellow," said a woman. "They would have had the
+lady's purse and watch if it hadn't been for him. They were a
+gang, and a rough one, too. Ah, he's breathing now."
+
+"He can't lie in the street. May we bring him in, marm?"
+
+"Surely. Bring him into the sitting-room. There is a comfortable
+sofa. This way, please!"
+
+Slowly and solemnly he was borne into Briony Lodge and laid out
+in the principal room, while I still observed the proceedings
+from my post by the window. The lamps had been lit, but the
+blinds had not been drawn, so that I could see Holmes as he lay
+upon the couch. I do not know whether he was seized with
+compunction at that moment for the part he was playing, but I
+know that I never felt more heartily ashamed of myself in my life
+than when I saw the beautiful creature against whom I was
+conspiring, or the grace and kindliness with which she waited
+upon the injured man. And yet it would be the blackest treachery
+to Holmes to draw back now from the part which he had intrusted
+to me. I hardened my heart, and took the smoke-rocket from under
+my ulster. After all, I thought, we are not injuring her. We are
+but preventing her from injuring another.
+
+Holmes had sat up upon the couch, and I saw him motion like a man
+who is in need of air. A maid rushed across and threw open the
+window. At the same instant I saw him raise his hand and at the
+signal I tossed my rocket into the room with a cry of "Fire!" The
+word was no sooner out of my mouth than the whole crowd of
+spectators, well dressed and ill--gentlemen, ostlers, and
+servant-maids--joined in a general shriek of "Fire!" Thick clouds
+of smoke curled through the room and out at the open window. I
+caught a glimpse of rushing figures, and a moment later the voice
+of Holmes from within assuring them that it was a false alarm.
+Slipping through the shouting crowd I made my way to the corner
+of the street, and in ten minutes was rejoiced to find my
+friend's arm in mine, and to get away from the scene of uproar.
+He walked swiftly and in silence for some few minutes until we
+had turned down one of the quiet streets which lead towards the
+Edgeware Road.
+
+"You did it very nicely, Doctor," he remarked. "Nothing could
+have been better. It is all right."
+
+"You have the photograph?"
+
+"I know where it is."
+
+"And how did you find out?"
+
+"She showed me, as I told you she would."
+
+"I am still in the dark."
+
+"I do not wish to make a mystery," said he, laughing. "The matter
+was perfectly simple. You, of course, saw that everyone in the
+street was an accomplice. They were all engaged for the evening."
+
+"I guessed as much."
+
+"Then, when the row broke out, I had a little moist red paint in
+the palm of my hand. I rushed forward, fell down, clapped my hand
+to my face, and became a piteous spectacle. It is an old trick."
+
+"That also I could fathom."
+
+"Then they carried me in. She was bound to have me in. What else
+could she do? And into her sitting-room, which was the very room
+which I suspected. It lay between that and her bedroom, and I was
+determined to see which. They laid me on a couch, I motioned for
+air, they were compelled to open the window, and you had your
+chance."
+
+"How did that help you?"
+
+"It was all-important. When a woman thinks that her house is on
+fire, her instinct is at once to rush to the thing which she
+values most. It is a perfectly overpowering impulse, and I have
+more than once taken advantage of it. In the case of the
+Darlington substitution scandal it was of use to me, and also in
+the Arnsworth Castle business. A married woman grabs at her baby;
+an unmarried one reaches for her jewel-box. Now it was clear to
+me that our lady of to-day had nothing in the house more precious
+to her than what we are in quest of. She would rush to secure it.
+The alarm of fire was admirably done. The smoke and shouting were
+enough to shake nerves of steel. She responded beautifully. The
+photograph is in a recess behind a sliding panel just above the
+right bell-pull. She was there in an instant, and I caught a
+glimpse of it as she half-drew it out. When I cried out that it
+was a false alarm, she replaced it, glanced at the rocket, rushed
+from the room, and I have not seen her since. I rose, and, making
+my excuses, escaped from the house. I hesitated whether to
+attempt to secure the photograph at once; but the coachman had
+come in, and as he was watching me narrowly it seemed safer to
+wait. A little over-precipitance may ruin all."
+
+"And now?" I asked.
+
+"Our quest is practically finished. I shall call with the King
+to-morrow, and with you, if you care to come with us. We will be
+shown into the sitting-room to wait for the lady, but it is
+probable that when she comes she may find neither us nor the
+photograph. It might be a satisfaction to his Majesty to regain
+it with his own hands."
+
+"And when will you call?"
+
+"At eight in the morning. She will not be up, so that we shall
+have a clear field. Besides, we must be prompt, for this marriage
+may mean a complete change in her life and habits. I must wire to
+the King without delay."
+
+We had reached Baker Street and had stopped at the door. He was
+searching his pockets for the key when someone passing said:
+
+"Good-night, Mister Sherlock Holmes."
+
+There were several people on the pavement at the time, but the
+greeting appeared to come from a slim youth in an ulster who had
+hurried by.
+
+"I've heard that voice before," said Holmes, staring down the
+dimly lit street. "Now, I wonder who the deuce that could have
+been."
+
+
+III.
+
+I slept at Baker Street that night, and we were engaged upon our
+toast and coffee in the morning when the King of Bohemia rushed
+into the room.
+
+"You have really got it!" he cried, grasping Sherlock Holmes by
+either shoulder and looking eagerly into his face.
+
+"Not yet."
+
+"But you have hopes?"
+
+"I have hopes."
+
+"Then, come. I am all impatience to be gone."
+
+"We must have a cab."
+
+"No, my brougham is waiting."
+
+"Then that will simplify matters." We descended and started off
+once more for Briony Lodge.
+
+"Irene Adler is married," remarked Holmes.
+
+"Married! When?"
+
+"Yesterday."
+
+"But to whom?"
+
+"To an English lawyer named Norton."
+
+"But she could not love him."
+
+"I am in hopes that she does."
+
+"And why in hopes?"
+
+"Because it would spare your Majesty all fear of future
+annoyance. If the lady loves her husband, she does not love your
+Majesty. If she does not love your Majesty, there is no reason
+why she should interfere with your Majesty's plan."
+
+"It is true. And yet--Well! I wish she had been of my own
+station! What a queen she would have made!" He relapsed into a
+moody silence, which was not broken until we drew up in
+Serpentine Avenue.
+
+The door of Briony Lodge was open, and an elderly woman stood
+upon the steps. She watched us with a sardonic eye as we stepped
+from the brougham.
+
+"Mr. Sherlock Holmes, I believe?" said she.
+
+"I am Mr. Holmes," answered my companion, looking at her with a
+questioning and rather startled gaze.
+
+"Indeed! My mistress told me that you were likely to call. She
+left this morning with her husband by the 5:15 train from Charing
+Cross for the Continent."
+
+"What!" Sherlock Holmes staggered back, white with chagrin and
+surprise. "Do you mean that she has left England?"
+
+"Never to return."
+
+"And the papers?" asked the King hoarsely. "All is lost."
+
+"We shall see." He pushed past the servant and rushed into the
+drawing-room, followed by the King and myself. The furniture was
+scattered about in every direction, with dismantled shelves and
+open drawers, as if the lady had hurriedly ransacked them before
+her flight. Holmes rushed at the bell-pull, tore back a small
+sliding shutter, and, plunging in his hand, pulled out a
+photograph and a letter. The photograph was of Irene Adler
+herself in evening dress, the letter was superscribed to
+"Sherlock Holmes, Esq. To be left till called for." My friend
+tore it open and we all three read it together. It was dated at
+midnight of the preceding night and ran in this way:
+
+"MY DEAR MR. SHERLOCK HOLMES,--You really did it very well. You
+took me in completely. Until after the alarm of fire, I had not a
+suspicion. But then, when I found how I had betrayed myself, I
+began to think. I had been warned against you months ago. I had
+been told that if the King employed an agent it would certainly
+be you. And your address had been given me. Yet, with all this,
+you made me reveal what you wanted to know. Even after I became
+suspicious, I found it hard to think evil of such a dear, kind
+old clergyman. But, you know, I have been trained as an actress
+myself. Male costume is nothing new to me. I often take advantage
+of the freedom which it gives. I sent John, the coachman, to
+watch you, ran up stairs, got into my walking-clothes, as I call
+them, and came down just as you departed.
+
+"Well, I followed you to your door, and so made sure that I was
+really an object of interest to the celebrated Mr. Sherlock
+Holmes. Then I, rather imprudently, wished you good-night, and
+started for the Temple to see my husband.
+
+"We both thought the best resource was flight, when pursued by
+so formidable an antagonist; so you will find the nest empty when
+you call to-morrow. As to the photograph, your client may rest in
+peace. I love and am loved by a better man than he. The King may
+do what he will without hindrance from one whom he has cruelly
+wronged. I keep it only to safeguard myself, and to preserve a
+weapon which will always secure me from any steps which he might
+take in the future. I leave a photograph which he might care to
+possess; and I remain, dear Mr. Sherlock Holmes,
+
+                                      "Very truly yours,
+                                   "IRENE NORTON, née ADLER."
+
+"What a woman--oh, what a woman!" cried the King of Bohemia, when
+we had all three read this epistle. "Did I not tell you how quick
+and resolute she was? Would she not have made an admirable queen?
+Is it not a pity that she was not on my level?"
+
+"From what I have seen of the lady she seems indeed to be on a
+very different level to your Majesty," said Holmes coldly. "I am
+sorry that I have not been able to bring your Majesty's business
+to a more successful conclusion."
+
+"On the contrary, my dear sir," cried the King; "nothing could be
+more successful. I know that her word is inviolate. The
+photograph is now as safe as if it were in the fire."
+
+"I am glad to hear your Majesty say so."
+
+"I am immensely indebted to you. Pray tell me in what way I can
+reward you. This ring--" He slipped an emerald snake ring from
+his finger and held it out upon the palm of his hand.
+
+"Your Majesty has something which I should value even more
+highly," said Holmes.
+
+"You have but to name it."
+
+"This photograph!"
+
+The King stared at him in amazement.
+
+"Irene's photograph!" he cried. "Certainly, if you wish it."
+
+"I thank your Majesty. Then there is no more to be done in the
+matter. I have the honour to wish you a very good-morning." He
+bowed, and, turning away without observing the hand which the
+King had stretched out to him, he set off in my company for his
+chambers.
+
+And that was how a great scandal threatened to affect the kingdom
+of Bohemia, and how the best plans of Mr. Sherlock Holmes were
+beaten by a woman's wit. He used to make merry over the
+cleverness of women, but I have not heard him do it of late. And
+when he speaks of Irene Adler, or when he refers to her
+photograph, it is always under the honourable title of the woman.
+
+
+
+ADVENTURE II. THE RED-HEADED LEAGUE
+
+I had called upon my friend, Mr. Sherlock Holmes, one day in the
+autumn of last year and found him in deep conversation with a
+very stout, florid-faced, elderly gentleman with fiery red hair.
+With an apology for my intrusion, I was about to withdraw when
+Holmes pulled me abruptly into the room and closed the door
+behind me.
+
+"You could not possibly have come at a better time, my dear
+Watson," he said cordially.
+
+"I was afraid that you were engaged."
+
+"So I am. Very much so."
+
+"Then I can wait in the next room."
+
+"Not at all. This gentleman, Mr. Wilson, has been my partner and
+helper in many of my most successful cases, and I have no
+doubt that he will be of the utmost use to me in yours also."
+
+The stout gentleman half rose from his chair and gave a bob of
+greeting, with a quick little questioning glance from his small
+fat-encircled eyes.
+
+"Try the settee," said Holmes, relapsing into his armchair and
+putting his fingertips together, as was his custom when in
+judicial moods. "I know, my dear Watson, that you share my love
+of all that is bizarre and outside the conventions and humdrum
+routine of everyday life. You have shown your relish for it by
+the enthusiasm which has prompted you to chronicle, and, if you
+will excuse my saying so, somewhat to embellish so many of my own
+little adventures."
+
+"Your cases have indeed been of the greatest interest to me," I
+observed.
+
+"You will remember that I remarked the other day, just before we
+went into the very simple problem presented by Miss Mary
+Sutherland, that for strange effects and extraordinary
+combinations we must go to life itself, which is always far more
+daring than any effort of the imagination."
+
+"A proposition which I took the liberty of doubting."
+
+"You did, Doctor, but none the less you must come round to my
+view, for otherwise I shall keep on piling fact upon fact on you
+until your reason breaks down under them and acknowledges me to
+be right. Now, Mr. Jabez Wilson here has been good enough to call
+upon me this morning, and to begin a narrative which promises to
+be one of the most singular which I have listened to for some
+time. You have heard me remark that the strangest and most unique
+things are very often connected not with the larger but with the
+smaller crimes, and occasionally, indeed, where there is room for
+doubt whether any positive crime has been committed. As far as I
+have heard it is impossible for me to say whether the present
+case is an instance of crime or not, but the course of events is
+certainly among the most singular that I have ever listened to.
+Perhaps, Mr. Wilson, you would have the great kindness to
+recommence your narrative. I ask you not merely because my friend
+Dr. Watson has not heard the opening part but also because the
+peculiar nature of the story makes me anxious to have every
+possible detail from your lips. As a rule, when I have heard some
+slight indication of the course of events, I am able to guide
+myself by the thousands of other similar cases which occur to my
+memory. In the present instance I am forced to admit that the
+facts are, to the best of my belief, unique."
+
+The portly client puffed out his chest with an appearance of some
+little pride and pulled a dirty and wrinkled newspaper from the
+inside pocket of his greatcoat. As he glanced down the
+advertisement column, with his head thrust forward and the paper
+flattened out upon his knee, I took a good look at the man and
+endeavoured, after the fashion of my companion, to read the
+indications which might be presented by his dress or appearance.
+
+I did not gain very much, however, by my inspection. Our visitor
+bore every mark of being an average commonplace British
+tradesman, obese, pompous, and slow. He wore rather baggy grey
+shepherd's check trousers, a not over-clean black frock-coat,
+unbuttoned in the front, and a drab waistcoat with a heavy brassy
+Albert chain, and a square pierced bit of metal dangling down as
+an ornament. A frayed top-hat and a faded brown overcoat with a
+wrinkled velvet collar lay upon a chair beside him. Altogether,
+look as I would, there was nothing remarkable about the man save
+his blazing red head, and the expression of extreme chagrin and
+discontent upon his features.
+
+Sherlock Holmes' quick eye took in my occupation, and he shook
+his head with a smile as he noticed my questioning glances.
+"Beyond the obvious facts that he has at some time done manual
+labour, that he takes snuff, that he is a Freemason, that he has
+been in China, and that he has done a considerable amount of
+writing lately, I can deduce nothing else."
+
+Mr. Jabez Wilson started up in his chair, with his forefinger
+upon the paper, but his eyes upon my companion.
+
+"How, in the name of good-fortune, did you know all that, Mr.
+Holmes?" he asked. "How did you know, for example, that I did
+manual labour. It's as true as gospel, for I began as a ship's
+carpenter."
+
+"Your hands, my dear sir. Your right hand is quite a size larger
+than your left. You have worked with it, and the muscles are more
+developed."
+
+"Well, the snuff, then, and the Freemasonry?"
+
+"I won't insult your intelligence by telling you how I read that,
+especially as, rather against the strict rules of your order, you
+use an arc-and-compass breastpin."
+
+"Ah, of course, I forgot that. But the writing?"
+
+"What else can be indicated by that right cuff so very shiny for
+five inches, and the left one with the smooth patch near the
+elbow where you rest it upon the desk?"
+
+"Well, but China?"
+
+"The fish that you have tattooed immediately above your right
+wrist could only have been done in China. I have made a small
+study of tattoo marks and have even contributed to the literature
+of the subject. That trick of staining the fishes' scales of a
+delicate pink is quite peculiar to China. When, in addition, I
+see a Chinese coin hanging from your watch-chain, the matter
+becomes even more simple."
+
+Mr. Jabez Wilson laughed heavily. "Well, I never!" said he. "I
+thought at first that you had done something clever, but I see
+that there was nothing in it, after all."
+
+"I begin to think, Watson," said Holmes, "that I make a mistake
+in explaining. 'Omne ignotum pro magnifico,' you know, and my
+poor little reputation, such as it is, will suffer shipwreck if I
+am so candid. Can you not find the advertisement, Mr. Wilson?"
+
+"Yes, I have got it now," he answered with his thick red finger
+planted halfway down the column. "Here it is. This is what began
+it all. You just read it for yourself, sir."
+
+I took the paper from him and read as follows:
+
+"TO THE RED-HEADED LEAGUE: On account of the bequest of the late
+Ezekiah Hopkins, of Lebanon, Pennsylvania, U. S. A., there is now
+another vacancy open which entitles a member of the League to a
+salary of 4 pounds a week for purely nominal services. All
+red-headed men who are sound in body and mind and above the age
+of twenty-one years, are eligible. Apply in person on Monday, at
+eleven o'clock, to Duncan Ross, at the offices of the League, 7
+Pope's Court, Fleet Street."
+
+"What on earth does this mean?" I ejaculated after I had twice
+read over the extraordinary announcement.
+
+Holmes chuckled and wriggled in his chair, as was his habit when
+in high spirits. "It is a little off the beaten track, isn't it?"
+said he. "And now, Mr. Wilson, off you go at scratch and tell us
+all about yourself, your household, and the effect which this
+advertisement had upon your fortunes. You will first make a note,
+Doctor, of the paper and the date."
+
+"It is The Morning Chronicle of April 27, 1890. Just two months
+ago."
+
+"Very good. Now, Mr. Wilson?"
+
+"Well, it is just as I have been telling you, Mr. Sherlock
+Holmes," said Jabez Wilson, mopping his forehead; "I have a small
+pawnbroker's business at Coburg Square, near the City. It's not a
+very large affair, and of late years it has not done more than
+just give me a living. I used to be able to keep two assistants,
+but now I only keep one; and I would have a job to pay him but
+that he is willing to come for half wages so as to learn the
+business."
+
+"What is the name of this obliging youth?" asked Sherlock Holmes.
+
+"His name is Vincent Spaulding, and he's not such a youth,
+either. It's hard to say his age. I should not wish a smarter
+assistant, Mr. Holmes; and I know very well that he could better
+himself and earn twice what I am able to give him. But, after
+all, if he is satisfied, why should I put ideas in his head?"
+
+"Why, indeed? You seem most fortunate in having an employé who
+comes under the full market price. It is not a common experience
+among employers in this age. I don't know that your assistant is
+not as remarkable as your advertisement."
+
+"Oh, he has his faults, too," said Mr. Wilson. "Never was such a
+fellow for photography. Snapping away with a camera when he ought
+to be improving his mind, and then diving down into the cellar
+like a rabbit into its hole to develop his pictures. That is his
+main fault, but on the whole he's a good worker. There's no vice
+in him."
+
+"He is still with you, I presume?"
+
+"Yes, sir. He and a girl of fourteen, who does a bit of simple
+cooking and keeps the place clean--that's all I have in the
+house, for I am a widower and never had any family. We live very
+quietly, sir, the three of us; and we keep a roof over our heads
+and pay our debts, if we do nothing more.
+
+"The first thing that put us out was that advertisement.
+Spaulding, he came down into the office just this day eight
+weeks, with this very paper in his hand, and he says:
+
+"'I wish to the Lord, Mr. Wilson, that I was a red-headed man.'
+
+"'Why that?' I asks.
+
+"'Why,' says he, 'here's another vacancy on the League of the
+Red-headed Men. It's worth quite a little fortune to any man who
+gets it, and I understand that there are more vacancies than
+there are men, so that the trustees are at their wits' end what
+to do with the money. If my hair would only change colour, here's
+a nice little crib all ready for me to step into.'
+
+"'Why, what is it, then?' I asked. You see, Mr. Holmes, I am a
+very stay-at-home man, and as my business came to me instead of
+my having to go to it, I was often weeks on end without putting
+my foot over the door-mat. In that way I didn't know much of what
+was going on outside, and I was always glad of a bit of news.
+
+"'Have you never heard of the League of the Red-headed Men?' he
+asked with his eyes open.
+
+"'Never.'
+
+"'Why, I wonder at that, for you are eligible yourself for one
+of the vacancies.'
+
+"'And what are they worth?' I asked.
+
+"'Oh, merely a couple of hundred a year, but the work is slight,
+and it need not interfere very much with one's other
+occupations.'
+
+"Well, you can easily think that that made me prick up my ears,
+for the business has not been over-good for some years, and an
+extra couple of hundred would have been very handy.
+
+"'Tell me all about it,' said I.
+
+"'Well,' said he, showing me the advertisement, 'you can see for
+yourself that the League has a vacancy, and there is the address
+where you should apply for particulars. As far as I can make out,
+the League was founded by an American millionaire, Ezekiah
+Hopkins, who was very peculiar in his ways. He was himself
+red-headed, and he had a great sympathy for all red-headed men;
+so when he died it was found that he had left his enormous
+fortune in the hands of trustees, with instructions to apply the
+interest to the providing of easy berths to men whose hair is of
+that colour. From all I hear it is splendid pay and very little to
+do.'
+
+"'But,' said I, 'there would be millions of red-headed men who
+would apply.'
+
+"'Not so many as you might think,' he answered. 'You see it is
+really confined to Londoners, and to grown men. This American had
+started from London when he was young, and he wanted to do the
+old town a good turn. Then, again, I have heard it is no use your
+applying if your hair is light red, or dark red, or anything but
+real bright, blazing, fiery red. Now, if you cared to apply, Mr.
+Wilson, you would just walk in; but perhaps it would hardly be
+worth your while to put yourself out of the way for the sake of a
+few hundred pounds.'
+
+"Now, it is a fact, gentlemen, as you may see for yourselves,
+that my hair is of a very full and rich tint, so that it seemed
+to me that if there was to be any competition in the matter I
+stood as good a chance as any man that I had ever met. Vincent
+Spaulding seemed to know so much about it that I thought he might
+prove useful, so I just ordered him to put up the shutters for
+the day and to come right away with me. He was very willing to
+have a holiday, so we shut the business up and started off for
+the address that was given us in the advertisement.
+
+"I never hope to see such a sight as that again, Mr. Holmes. From
+north, south, east, and west every man who had a shade of red in
+his hair had tramped into the city to answer the advertisement.
+Fleet Street was choked with red-headed folk, and Pope's Court
+looked like a coster's orange barrow. I should not have thought
+there were so many in the whole country as were brought together
+by that single advertisement. Every shade of colour they
+were--straw, lemon, orange, brick, Irish-setter, liver, clay;
+but, as Spaulding said, there were not many who had the real
+vivid flame-coloured tint. When I saw how many were waiting, I
+would have given it up in despair; but Spaulding would not hear
+of it. How he did it I could not imagine, but he pushed and
+pulled and butted until he got me through the crowd, and right up
+to the steps which led to the office. There was a double stream
+upon the stair, some going up in hope, and some coming back
+dejected; but we wedged in as well as we could and soon found
+ourselves in the office."
+
+"Your experience has been a most entertaining one," remarked
+Holmes as his client paused and refreshed his memory with a huge
+pinch of snuff. "Pray continue your very interesting statement."
+
+"There was nothing in the office but a couple of wooden chairs
+and a deal table, behind which sat a small man with a head that
+was even redder than mine. He said a few words to each candidate
+as he came up, and then he always managed to find some fault in
+them which would disqualify them. Getting a vacancy did not seem
+to be such a very easy matter, after all. However, when our turn
+came the little man was much more favourable to me than to any of
+the others, and he closed the door as we entered, so that he
+might have a private word with us.
+
+"'This is Mr. Jabez Wilson,' said my assistant, 'and he is
+willing to fill a vacancy in the League.'
+
+"'And he is admirably suited for it,' the other answered. 'He has
+every requirement. I cannot recall when I have seen anything so
+fine.' He took a step backward, cocked his head on one side, and
+gazed at my hair until I felt quite bashful. Then suddenly he
+plunged forward, wrung my hand, and congratulated me warmly on my
+success.
+
+"'It would be injustice to hesitate,' said he. 'You will,
+however, I am sure, excuse me for taking an obvious precaution.'
+With that he seized my hair in both his hands, and tugged until I
+yelled with the pain. 'There is water in your eyes,' said he as
+he released me. 'I perceive that all is as it should be. But we
+have to be careful, for we have twice been deceived by wigs and
+once by paint. I could tell you tales of cobbler's wax which
+would disgust you with human nature.' He stepped over to the
+window and shouted through it at the top of his voice that the
+vacancy was filled. A groan of disappointment came up from below,
+and the folk all trooped away in different directions until there
+was not a red-head to be seen except my own and that of the
+manager.
+
+"'My name,' said he, 'is Mr. Duncan Ross, and I am myself one of
+the pensioners upon the fund left by our noble benefactor. Are
+you a married man, Mr. Wilson? Have you a family?'
+
+"I answered that I had not.
+
+"His face fell immediately.
+
+"'Dear me!' he said gravely, 'that is very serious indeed! I am
+sorry to hear you say that. The fund was, of course, for the
+propagation and spread of the red-heads as well as for their
+maintenance. It is exceedingly unfortunate that you should be a
+bachelor.'
+
+"My face lengthened at this, Mr. Holmes, for I thought that I was
+not to have the vacancy after all; but after thinking it over for
+a few minutes he said that it would be all right.
+
+"'In the case of another,' said he, 'the objection might be
+fatal, but we must stretch a point in favour of a man with such a
+head of hair as yours. When shall you be able to enter upon your
+new duties?'
+
+"'Well, it is a little awkward, for I have a business already,'
+said I.
+
+"'Oh, never mind about that, Mr. Wilson!' said Vincent Spaulding.
+'I should be able to look after that for you.'
+
+"'What would be the hours?' I asked.
+
+"'Ten to two.'
+
+"Now a pawnbroker's business is mostly done of an evening, Mr.
+Holmes, especially Thursday and Friday evening, which is just
+before pay-day; so it would suit me very well to earn a little in
+the mornings. Besides, I knew that my assistant was a good man,
+and that he would see to anything that turned up.
+
+"'That would suit me very well,' said I. 'And the pay?'
+
+"'Is 4 pounds a week.'
+
+"'And the work?'
+
+"'Is purely nominal.'
+
+"'What do you call purely nominal?'
+
+"'Well, you have to be in the office, or at least in the
+building, the whole time. If you leave, you forfeit your whole
+position forever. The will is very clear upon that point. You
+don't comply with the conditions if you budge from the office
+during that time.'
+
+"'It's only four hours a day, and I should not think of leaving,'
+said I.
+
+"'No excuse will avail,' said Mr. Duncan Ross; 'neither sickness
+nor business nor anything else. There you must stay, or you lose
+your billet.'
+
+"'And the work?'
+
+"'Is to copy out the "Encyclopaedia Britannica." There is the first
+volume of it in that press. You must find your own ink, pens, and
+blotting-paper, but we provide this table and chair. Will you be
+ready to-morrow?'
+
+"'Certainly,' I answered.
+
+"'Then, good-bye, Mr. Jabez Wilson, and let me congratulate you
+once more on the important position which you have been fortunate
+enough to gain.' He bowed me out of the room and I went home with
+my assistant, hardly knowing what to say or do, I was so pleased
+at my own good fortune.
+
+"Well, I thought over the matter all day, and by evening I was in
+low spirits again; for I had quite persuaded myself that the
+whole affair must be some great hoax or fraud, though what its
+object might be I could not imagine. It seemed altogether past
+belief that anyone could make such a will, or that they would pay
+such a sum for doing anything so simple as copying out the
+'Encyclopaedia Britannica.' Vincent Spaulding did what he could to
+cheer me up, but by bedtime I had reasoned myself out of the
+whole thing. However, in the morning I determined to have a look
+at it anyhow, so I bought a penny bottle of ink, and with a
+quill-pen, and seven sheets of foolscap paper, I started off for
+Pope's Court.
+
+"Well, to my surprise and delight, everything was as right as
+possible. The table was set out ready for me, and Mr. Duncan Ross
+was there to see that I got fairly to work. He started me off
+upon the letter A, and then he left me; but he would drop in from
+time to time to see that all was right with me. At two o'clock he
+bade me good-day, complimented me upon the amount that I had
+written, and locked the door of the office after me.
+
+"This went on day after day, Mr. Holmes, and on Saturday the
+manager came in and planked down four golden sovereigns for my
+week's work. It was the same next week, and the same the week
+after. Every morning I was there at ten, and every afternoon I
+left at two. By degrees Mr. Duncan Ross took to coming in only
+once of a morning, and then, after a time, he did not come in at
+all. Still, of course, I never dared to leave the room for an
+instant, for I was not sure when he might come, and the billet
+was such a good one, and suited me so well, that I would not risk
+the loss of it.
+
+"Eight weeks passed away like this, and I had written about
+Abbots and Archery and Armour and Architecture and Attica, and
+hoped with diligence that I might get on to the B's before very
+long. It cost me something in foolscap, and I had pretty nearly
+filled a shelf with my writings. And then suddenly the whole
+business came to an end."
+
+"To an end?"
+
+"Yes, sir. And no later than this morning. I went to my work as
+usual at ten o'clock, but the door was shut and locked, with a
+little square of cardboard hammered on to the middle of the
+panel with a tack. Here it is, and you can read for yourself."
+
+He held up a piece of white cardboard about the size of a sheet
+of note-paper. It read in this fashion:
+
+                  THE RED-HEADED LEAGUE
+
+                           IS
+
+                        DISSOLVED.
+
+                     October 9, 1890.
+
+Sherlock Holmes and I surveyed this curt announcement and the
+rueful face behind it, until the comical side of the affair so
+completely overtopped every other consideration that we both
+burst out into a roar of laughter.
+
+"I cannot see that there is anything very funny," cried our
+client, flushing up to the roots of his flaming head. "If you can
+do nothing better than laugh at me, I can go elsewhere."
+
+"No, no," cried Holmes, shoving him back into the chair from
+which he had half risen. "I really wouldn't miss your case for
+the world. It is most refreshingly unusual. But there is, if you
+will excuse my saying so, something just a little funny about it.
+Pray what steps did you take when you found the card upon the
+door?"
+
+"I was staggered, sir. I did not know what to do. Then I called
+at the offices round, but none of them seemed to know anything
+about it. Finally, I went to the landlord, who is an accountant
+living on the ground-floor, and I asked him if he could tell me
+what had become of the Red-headed League. He said that he had
+never heard of any such body. Then I asked him who Mr. Duncan
+Ross was. He answered that the name was new to him.
+
+"'Well,' said I, 'the gentleman at No. 4.'
+
+"'What, the red-headed man?'
+
+"'Yes.'
+
+"'Oh,' said he, 'his name was William Morris. He was a solicitor
+and was using my room as a temporary convenience until his new
+premises were ready. He moved out yesterday.'
+
+"'Where could I find him?'
+
+"'Oh, at his new offices. He did tell me the address. Yes, 17
+King Edward Street, near St. Paul's.'
+
+"I started off, Mr. Holmes, but when I got to that address it was
+a manufactory of artificial knee-caps, and no one in it had ever
+heard of either Mr. William Morris or Mr. Duncan Ross."
+
+"And what did you do then?" asked Holmes.
+
+"I went home to Saxe-Coburg Square, and I took the advice of my
+assistant. But he could not help me in any way. He could only say
+that if I waited I should hear by post. But that was not quite
+good enough, Mr. Holmes. I did not wish to lose such a place
+without a struggle, so, as I had heard that you were good enough
+to give advice to poor folk who were in need of it, I came right
+away to you."
+
+"And you did very wisely," said Holmes. "Your case is an
+exceedingly remarkable one, and I shall be happy to look into it.
+From what you have told me I think that it is possible that
+graver issues hang from it than might at first sight appear."
+
+"Grave enough!" said Mr. Jabez Wilson. "Why, I have lost four
+pound a week."
+
+"As far as you are personally concerned," remarked Holmes, "I do
+not see that you have any grievance against this extraordinary
+league. On the contrary, you are, as I understand, richer by some
+30 pounds, to say nothing of the minute knowledge which you have
+gained on every subject which comes under the letter A. You have
+lost nothing by them."
+
+"No, sir. But I want to find out about them, and who they are,
+and what their object was in playing this prank--if it was a
+prank--upon me. It was a pretty expensive joke for them, for it
+cost them two and thirty pounds."
+
+"We shall endeavour to clear up these points for you. And, first,
+one or two questions, Mr. Wilson. This assistant of yours who
+first called your attention to the advertisement--how long had he
+been with you?"
+
+"About a month then."
+
+"How did he come?"
+
+"In answer to an advertisement."
+
+"Was he the only applicant?"
+
+"No, I had a dozen."
+
+"Why did you pick him?"
+
+"Because he was handy and would come cheap."
+
+"At half-wages, in fact."
+
+"Yes."
+
+"What is he like, this Vincent Spaulding?"
+
+"Small, stout-built, very quick in his ways, no hair on his face,
+though he's not short of thirty. Has a white splash of acid upon
+his forehead."
+
+Holmes sat up in his chair in considerable excitement. "I thought
+as much," said he. "Have you ever observed that his ears are
+pierced for earrings?"
+
+"Yes, sir. He told me that a gipsy had done it for him when he
+was a lad."
+
+"Hum!" said Holmes, sinking back in deep thought. "He is still
+with you?"
+
+"Oh, yes, sir; I have only just left him."
+
+"And has your business been attended to in your absence?"
+
+"Nothing to complain of, sir. There's never very much to do of a
+morning."
+
+"That will do, Mr. Wilson. I shall be happy to give you an
+opinion upon the subject in the course of a day or two. To-day is
+Saturday, and I hope that by Monday we may come to a conclusion."
+
+"Well, Watson," said Holmes when our visitor had left us, "what
+do you make of it all?"
+
+"I make nothing of it," I answered frankly. "It is a most
+mysterious business."
+
+"As a rule," said Holmes, "the more bizarre a thing is the less
+mysterious it proves to be. It is your commonplace, featureless
+crimes which are really puzzling, just as a commonplace face is
+the most difficult to identify. But I must be prompt over this
+matter."
+
+"What are you going to do, then?" I asked.
+
+"To smoke," he answered. "It is quite a three pipe problem, and I
+beg that you won't speak to me for fifty minutes." He curled
+himself up in his chair, with his thin knees drawn up to his
+hawk-like nose, and there he sat with his eyes closed and his
+black clay pipe thrusting out like the bill of some strange bird.
+I had come to the conclusion that he had dropped asleep, and
+indeed was nodding myself, when he suddenly sprang out of his
+chair with the gesture of a man who has made up his mind and put
+his pipe down upon the mantelpiece.
+
+"Sarasate plays at the St. James's Hall this afternoon," he
+remarked. "What do you think, Watson? Could your patients spare
+you for a few hours?"
+
+"I have nothing to do to-day. My practice is never very
+absorbing."
+
+"Then put on your hat and come. I am going through the City
+first, and we can have some lunch on the way. I observe that
+there is a good deal of German music on the programme, which is
+rather more to my taste than Italian or French. It is
+introspective, and I want to introspect. Come along!"
+
+We travelled by the Underground as far as Aldersgate; and a short
+walk took us to Saxe-Coburg Square, the scene of the singular
+story which we had listened to in the morning. It was a poky,
+little, shabby-genteel place, where four lines of dingy
+two-storied brick houses looked out into a small railed-in
+enclosure, where a lawn of weedy grass and a few clumps of faded
+laurel-bushes made a hard fight against a smoke-laden and
+uncongenial atmosphere. Three gilt balls and a brown board with
+"JABEZ WILSON" in white letters, upon a corner house, announced
+the place where our red-headed client carried on his business.
+Sherlock Holmes stopped in front of it with his head on one side
+and looked it all over, with his eyes shining brightly between
+puckered lids. Then he walked slowly up the street, and then down
+again to the corner, still looking keenly at the houses. Finally
+he returned to the pawnbroker's, and, having thumped vigorously
+upon the pavement with his stick two or three times, he went up
+to the door and knocked. It was instantly opened by a
+bright-looking, clean-shaven young fellow, who asked him to step
+in.
+
+"Thank you," said Holmes, "I only wished to ask you how you would
+go from here to the Strand."
+
+"Third right, fourth left," answered the assistant promptly,
+closing the door.
+
+"Smart fellow, that," observed Holmes as we walked away. "He is,
+in my judgment, the fourth smartest man in London, and for daring
+I am not sure that he has not a claim to be third. I have known
+something of him before."
+
+"Evidently," said I, "Mr. Wilson's assistant counts for a good
+deal in this mystery of the Red-headed League. I am sure that you
+inquired your way merely in order that you might see him."
+
+"Not him."
+
+"What then?"
+
+"The knees of his trousers."
+
+"And what did you see?"
+
+"What I expected to see."
+
+"Why did you beat the pavement?"
+
+"My dear doctor, this is a time for observation, not for talk. We
+are spies in an enemy's country. We know something of Saxe-Coburg
+Square. Let us now explore the parts which lie behind it."
+
+The road in which we found ourselves as we turned round the
+corner from the retired Saxe-Coburg Square presented as great a
+contrast to it as the front of a picture does to the back. It was
+one of the main arteries which conveyed the traffic of the City
+to the north and west. The roadway was blocked with the immense
+stream of commerce flowing in a double tide inward and outward,
+while the footpaths were black with the hurrying swarm of
+pedestrians. It was difficult to realise as we looked at the line
+of fine shops and stately business premises that they really
+abutted on the other side upon the faded and stagnant square
+which we had just quitted.
+
+"Let me see," said Holmes, standing at the corner and glancing
+along the line, "I should like just to remember the order of the
+houses here. It is a hobby of mine to have an exact knowledge of
+London. There is Mortimer's, the tobacconist, the little
+newspaper shop, the Coburg branch of the City and Suburban Bank,
+the Vegetarian Restaurant, and McFarlane's carriage-building
+depot. That carries us right on to the other block. And now,
+Doctor, we've done our work, so it's time we had some play. A
+sandwich and a cup of coffee, and then off to violin-land, where
+all is sweetness and delicacy and harmony, and there are no
+red-headed clients to vex us with their conundrums."
+
+My friend was an enthusiastic musician, being himself not only a
+very capable performer but a composer of no ordinary merit. All
+the afternoon he sat in the stalls wrapped in the most perfect
+happiness, gently waving his long, thin fingers in time to the
+music, while his gently smiling face and his languid, dreamy eyes
+were as unlike those of Holmes the sleuth-hound, Holmes the
+relentless, keen-witted, ready-handed criminal agent, as it was
+possible to conceive. In his singular character the dual nature
+alternately asserted itself, and his extreme exactness and
+astuteness represented, as I have often thought, the reaction
+against the poetic and contemplative mood which occasionally
+predominated in him. The swing of his nature took him from
+extreme languor to devouring energy; and, as I knew well, he was
+never so truly formidable as when, for days on end, he had been
+lounging in his armchair amid his improvisations and his
+black-letter editions. Then it was that the lust of the chase
+would suddenly come upon him, and that his brilliant reasoning
+power would rise to the level of intuition, until those who were
+unacquainted with his methods would look askance at him as on a
+man whose knowledge was not that of other mortals. When I saw him
+that afternoon so enwrapped in the music at St. James's Hall I
+felt that an evil time might be coming upon those whom he had set
+himself to hunt down.
+
+"You want to go home, no doubt, Doctor," he remarked as we
+emerged.
+
+"Yes, it would be as well."
+
+"And I have some business to do which will take some hours. This
+business at Coburg Square is serious."
+
+"Why serious?"
+
+"A considerable crime is in contemplation. I have every reason to
+believe that we shall be in time to stop it. But to-day being
+Saturday rather complicates matters. I shall want your help
+to-night."
+
+"At what time?"
+
+"Ten will be early enough."
+
+"I shall be at Baker Street at ten."
+
+"Very well. And, I say, Doctor, there may be some little danger,
+so kindly put your army revolver in your pocket." He waved his
+hand, turned on his heel, and disappeared in an instant among the
+crowd.
+
+I trust that I am not more dense than my neighbours, but I was
+always oppressed with a sense of my own stupidity in my dealings
+with Sherlock Holmes. Here I had heard what he had heard, I had
+seen what he had seen, and yet from his words it was evident that
+he saw clearly not only what had happened but what was about to
+happen, while to me the whole business was still confused and
+grotesque. As I drove home to my house in Kensington I thought
+over it all, from the extraordinary story of the red-headed
+copier of the "Encyclopaedia" down to the visit to Saxe-Coburg
+Square, and the ominous words with which he had parted from me.
+What was this nocturnal expedition, and why should I go armed?
+Where were we going, and what were we to do? I had the hint from
+Holmes that this smooth-faced pawnbroker's assistant was a
+formidable man--a man who might play a deep game. I tried to
+puzzle it out, but gave it up in despair and set the matter aside
+until night should bring an explanation.
+
+It was a quarter-past nine when I started from home and made my
+way across the Park, and so through Oxford Street to Baker
+Street. Two hansoms were standing at the door, and as I entered
+the passage I heard the sound of voices from above. On entering
+his room I found Holmes in animated conversation with two men,
+one of whom I recognised as Peter Jones, the official police
+agent, while the other was a long, thin, sad-faced man, with a
+very shiny hat and oppressively respectable frock-coat.
+
+"Ha! Our party is complete," said Holmes, buttoning up his
+pea-jacket and taking his heavy hunting crop from the rack.
+"Watson, I think you know Mr. Jones, of Scotland Yard? Let me
+introduce you to Mr. Merryweather, who is to be our companion in
+to-night's adventure."
+
+"We're hunting in couples again, Doctor, you see," said Jones in
+his consequential way. "Our friend here is a wonderful man for
+starting a chase. All he wants is an old dog to help him to do
+the running down."
+
+"I hope a wild goose may not prove to be the end of our chase,"
+observed Mr. Merryweather gloomily.
+
+"You may place considerable confidence in Mr. Holmes, sir," said
+the police agent loftily. "He has his own little methods, which
+are, if he won't mind my saying so, just a little too theoretical
+and fantastic, but he has the makings of a detective in him. It
+is not too much to say that once or twice, as in that business of
+the Sholto murder and the Agra treasure, he has been more nearly
+correct than the official force."
+
+"Oh, if you say so, Mr. Jones, it is all right," said the
+stranger with deference. "Still, I confess that I miss my rubber.
+It is the first Saturday night for seven-and-twenty years that I
+have not had my rubber."
+
+"I think you will find," said Sherlock Holmes, "that you will
+play for a higher stake to-night than you have ever done yet, and
+that the play will be more exciting. For you, Mr. Merryweather,
+the stake will be some 30,000 pounds; and for you, Jones, it will
+be the man upon whom you wish to lay your hands."
+
+"John Clay, the murderer, thief, smasher, and forger. He's a
+young man, Mr. Merryweather, but he is at the head of his
+profession, and I would rather have my bracelets on him than on
+any criminal in London. He's a remarkable man, is young John
+Clay. His grandfather was a royal duke, and he himself has been
+to Eton and Oxford. His brain is as cunning as his fingers, and
+though we meet signs of him at every turn, we never know where to
+find the man himself. He'll crack a crib in Scotland one week,
+and be raising money to build an orphanage in Cornwall the next.
+I've been on his track for years and have never set eyes on him
+yet."
+
+"I hope that I may have the pleasure of introducing you to-night.
+I've had one or two little turns also with Mr. John Clay, and I
+agree with you that he is at the head of his profession. It is
+past ten, however, and quite time that we started. If you two
+will take the first hansom, Watson and I will follow in the
+second."
+
+Sherlock Holmes was not very communicative during the long drive
+and lay back in the cab humming the tunes which he had heard in
+the afternoon. We rattled through an endless labyrinth of gas-lit
+streets until we emerged into Farrington Street.
+
+"We are close there now," my friend remarked. "This fellow
+Merryweather is a bank director, and personally interested in the
+matter. I thought it as well to have Jones with us also. He is
+not a bad fellow, though an absolute imbecile in his profession.
+He has one positive virtue. He is as brave as a bulldog and as
+tenacious as a lobster if he gets his claws upon anyone. Here we
+are, and they are waiting for us."
+
+We had reached the same crowded thoroughfare in which we had
+found ourselves in the morning. Our cabs were dismissed, and,
+following the guidance of Mr. Merryweather, we passed down a
+narrow passage and through a side door, which he opened for us.
+Within there was a small corridor, which ended in a very massive
+iron gate. This also was opened, and led down a flight of winding
+stone steps, which terminated at another formidable gate. Mr.
+Merryweather stopped to light a lantern, and then conducted us
+down a dark, earth-smelling passage, and so, after opening a
+third door, into a huge vault or cellar, which was piled all
+round with crates and massive boxes.
+
+"You are not very vulnerable from above," Holmes remarked as he
+held up the lantern and gazed about him.
+
+"Nor from below," said Mr. Merryweather, striking his stick upon
+the flags which lined the floor. "Why, dear me, it sounds quite
+hollow!" he remarked, looking up in surprise.
+
+"I must really ask you to be a little more quiet!" said Holmes
+severely. "You have already imperilled the whole success of our
+expedition. Might I beg that you would have the goodness to sit
+down upon one of those boxes, and not to interfere?"
+
+The solemn Mr. Merryweather perched himself upon a crate, with a
+very injured expression upon his face, while Holmes fell upon his
+knees upon the floor and, with the lantern and a magnifying lens,
+began to examine minutely the cracks between the stones. A few
+seconds sufficed to satisfy him, for he sprang to his feet again
+and put his glass in his pocket.
+
+"We have at least an hour before us," he remarked, "for they can
+hardly take any steps until the good pawnbroker is safely in bed.
+Then they will not lose a minute, for the sooner they do their
+work the longer time they will have for their escape. We are at
+present, Doctor--as no doubt you have divined--in the cellar of
+the City branch of one of the principal London banks. Mr.
+Merryweather is the chairman of directors, and he will explain to
+you that there are reasons why the more daring criminals of
+London should take a considerable interest in this cellar at
+present."
+
+"It is our French gold," whispered the director. "We have had
+several warnings that an attempt might be made upon it."
+
+"Your French gold?"
+
+"Yes. We had occasion some months ago to strengthen our resources
+and borrowed for that purpose 30,000 napoleons from the Bank of
+France. It has become known that we have never had occasion to
+unpack the money, and that it is still lying in our cellar. The
+crate upon which I sit contains 2,000 napoleons packed between
+layers of lead foil. Our reserve of bullion is much larger at
+present than is usually kept in a single branch office, and the
+directors have had misgivings upon the subject."
+
+"Which were very well justified," observed Holmes. "And now it is
+time that we arranged our little plans. I expect that within an
+hour matters will come to a head. In the meantime Mr.
+Merryweather, we must put the screen over that dark lantern."
+
+"And sit in the dark?"
+
+"I am afraid so. I had brought a pack of cards in my pocket, and
+I thought that, as we were a partie carrée, you might have your
+rubber after all. But I see that the enemy's preparations have
+gone so far that we cannot risk the presence of a light. And,
+first of all, we must choose our positions. These are daring men,
+and though we shall take them at a disadvantage, they may do us
+some harm unless we are careful. I shall stand behind this crate,
+and do you conceal yourselves behind those. Then, when I flash a
+light upon them, close in swiftly. If they fire, Watson, have no
+compunction about shooting them down."
+
+I placed my revolver, cocked, upon the top of the wooden case
+behind which I crouched. Holmes shot the slide across the front
+of his lantern and left us in pitch darkness--such an absolute
+darkness as I have never before experienced. The smell of hot
+metal remained to assure us that the light was still there, ready
+to flash out at a moment's notice. To me, with my nerves worked
+up to a pitch of expectancy, there was something depressing and
+subduing in the sudden gloom, and in the cold dank air of the
+vault.
+
+"They have but one retreat," whispered Holmes. "That is back
+through the house into Saxe-Coburg Square. I hope that you have
+done what I asked you, Jones?"
+
+"I have an inspector and two officers waiting at the front door."
+
+"Then we have stopped all the holes. And now we must be silent
+and wait."
+
+What a time it seemed! From comparing notes afterwards it was but
+an hour and a quarter, yet it appeared to me that the night must
+have almost gone and the dawn be breaking above us. My limbs
+were weary and stiff, for I feared to change my position; yet my
+nerves were worked up to the highest pitch of tension, and my
+hearing was so acute that I could not only hear the gentle
+breathing of my companions, but I could distinguish the deeper,
+heavier in-breath of the bulky Jones from the thin, sighing note
+of the bank director. From my position I could look over the case
+in the direction of the floor. Suddenly my eyes caught the glint
+of a light.
+
+At first it was but a lurid spark upon the stone pavement. Then
+it lengthened out until it became a yellow line, and then,
+without any warning or sound, a gash seemed to open and a hand
+appeared, a white, almost womanly hand, which felt about in the
+centre of the little area of light. For a minute or more the
+hand, with its writhing fingers, protruded out of the floor. Then
+it was withdrawn as suddenly as it appeared, and all was dark
+again save the single lurid spark which marked a chink between
+the stones.
+
+Its disappearance, however, was but momentary. With a rending,
+tearing sound, one of the broad, white stones turned over upon
+its side and left a square, gaping hole, through which streamed
+the light of a lantern. Over the edge there peeped a clean-cut,
+boyish face, which looked keenly about it, and then, with a hand
+on either side of the aperture, drew itself shoulder-high and
+waist-high, until one knee rested upon the edge. In another
+instant he stood at the side of the hole and was hauling after
+him a companion, lithe and small like himself, with a pale face
+and a shock of very red hair.
+
+"It's all clear," he whispered. "Have you the chisel and the
+bags? Great Scott! Jump, Archie, jump, and I'll swing for it!"
+
+Sherlock Holmes had sprung out and seized the intruder by the
+collar. The other dived down the hole, and I heard the sound of
+rending cloth as Jones clutched at his skirts. The light flashed
+upon the barrel of a revolver, but Holmes' hunting crop came
+down on the man's wrist, and the pistol clinked upon the stone
+floor.
+
+"It's no use, John Clay," said Holmes blandly. "You have no
+chance at all."
+
+"So I see," the other answered with the utmost coolness. "I fancy
+that my pal is all right, though I see you have got his
+coat-tails."
+
+"There are three men waiting for him at the door," said Holmes.
+
+"Oh, indeed! You seem to have done the thing very completely. I
+must compliment you."
+
+"And I you," Holmes answered. "Your red-headed idea was very new
+and effective."
+
+"You'll see your pal again presently," said Jones. "He's quicker
+at climbing down holes than I am. Just hold out while I fix the
+derbies."
+
+"I beg that you will not touch me with your filthy hands,"
+remarked our prisoner as the handcuffs clattered upon his wrists.
+"You may not be aware that I have royal blood in my veins. Have
+the goodness, also, when you address me always to say 'sir' and
+'please.'"
+
+"All right," said Jones with a stare and a snigger. "Well, would
+you please, sir, march upstairs, where we can get a cab to carry
+your Highness to the police-station?"
+
+"That is better," said John Clay serenely. He made a sweeping bow
+to the three of us and walked quietly off in the custody of the
+detective.
+
+"Really, Mr. Holmes," said Mr. Merryweather as we followed them
+from the cellar, "I do not know how the bank can thank you or
+repay you. There is no doubt that you have detected and defeated
+in the most complete manner one of the most determined attempts
+at bank robbery that have ever come within my experience."
+
+"I have had one or two little scores of my own to settle with Mr.
+John Clay," said Holmes. "I have been at some small expense over
+this matter, which I shall expect the bank to refund, but beyond
+that I am amply repaid by having had an experience which is in
+many ways unique, and by hearing the very remarkable narrative of
+the Red-headed League."
+
+
+"You see, Watson," he explained in the early hours of the morning
+as we sat over a glass of whisky and soda in Baker Street, "it
+was perfectly obvious from the first that the only possible
+object of this rather fantastic business of the advertisement of
+the League, and the copying of the 'Encyclopaedia,' must be to get
+this not over-bright pawnbroker out of the way for a number of
+hours every day. It was a curious way of managing it, but,
+really, it would be difficult to suggest a better. The method was
+no doubt suggested to Clay's ingenious mind by the colour of his
+accomplice's hair. The 4 pounds a week was a lure which must draw
+him, and what was it to them, who were playing for thousands?
+They put in the advertisement, one rogue has the temporary
+office, the other rogue incites the man to apply for it, and
+together they manage to secure his absence every morning in the
+week. From the time that I heard of the assistant having come for
+half wages, it was obvious to me that he had some strong motive
+for securing the situation."
+
+"But how could you guess what the motive was?"
+
+"Had there been women in the house, I should have suspected a
+mere vulgar intrigue. That, however, was out of the question. The
+man's business was a small one, and there was nothing in his
+house which could account for such elaborate preparations, and
+such an expenditure as they were at. It must, then, be something
+out of the house. What could it be? I thought of the assistant's
+fondness for photography, and his trick of vanishing into the
+cellar. The cellar! There was the end of this tangled clue. Then
+I made inquiries as to this mysterious assistant and found that I
+had to deal with one of the coolest and most daring criminals in
+London. He was doing something in the cellar--something which
+took many hours a day for months on end. What could it be, once
+more? I could think of nothing save that he was running a tunnel
+to some other building.
+
+"So far I had got when we went to visit the scene of action. I
+surprised you by beating upon the pavement with my stick. I was
+ascertaining whether the cellar stretched out in front or behind.
+It was not in front. Then I rang the bell, and, as I hoped, the
+assistant answered it. We have had some skirmishes, but we had
+never set eyes upon each other before. I hardly looked at his
+face. His knees were what I wished to see. You must yourself have
+remarked how worn, wrinkled, and stained they were. They spoke of
+those hours of burrowing. The only remaining point was what they
+were burrowing for. I walked round the corner, saw the City and
+Suburban Bank abutted on our friend's premises, and felt that I
+had solved my problem. When you drove home after the concert I
+called upon Scotland Yard and upon the chairman of the bank
+directors, with the result that you have seen."
+
+"And how could you tell that they would make their attempt
+to-night?" I asked.
+
+"Well, when they closed their League offices that was a sign that
+they cared no longer about Mr. Jabez Wilson's presence--in other
+words, that they had completed their tunnel. But it was essential
+that they should use it soon, as it might be discovered, or the
+bullion might be removed. Saturday would suit them better than
+any other day, as it would give them two days for their escape.
+For all these reasons I expected them to come to-night."
+
+"You reasoned it out beautifully," I exclaimed in unfeigned
+admiration. "It is so long a chain, and yet every link rings
+true."
+
+"It saved me from ennui," he answered, yawning. "Alas! I already
+feel it closing in upon me. My life is spent in one long effort
+to escape from the commonplaces of existence. These little
+problems help me to do so."
+
+"And you are a benefactor of the race," said I.
+
+He shrugged his shoulders. "Well, perhaps, after all, it is of
+some little use," he remarked. "'L'homme c'est rien--l'oeuvre
+c'est tout,' as Gustave Flaubert wrote to George Sand."
+
+
+
+ADVENTURE III. A CASE OF IDENTITY
+
+"My dear fellow," said Sherlock Holmes as we sat on either side
+of the fire in his lodgings at Baker Street, "life is infinitely
+stranger than anything which the mind of man could invent. We
+would not dare to conceive the things which are really mere
+commonplaces of existence. If we could fly out of that window
+hand in hand, hover over this great city, gently remove the
+roofs, and peep in at the queer things which are going on, the
+strange coincidences, the plannings, the cross-purposes, the
+wonderful chains of events, working through generations, and
+leading to the most outré results, it would make all fiction with
+its conventionalities and foreseen conclusions most stale and
+unprofitable."
+
+"And yet I am not convinced of it," I answered. "The cases which
+come to light in the papers are, as a rule, bald enough, and
+vulgar enough. We have in our police reports realism pushed to
+its extreme limits, and yet the result is, it must be confessed,
+neither fascinating nor artistic."
+
+"A certain selection and discretion must be used in producing a
+realistic effect," remarked Holmes. "This is wanting in the
+police report, where more stress is laid, perhaps, upon the
+platitudes of the magistrate than upon the details, which to an
+observer contain the vital essence of the whole matter. Depend
+upon it, there is nothing so unnatural as the commonplace."
+
+I smiled and shook my head. "I can quite understand your thinking
+so," I said. "Of course, in your position of unofficial adviser
+and helper to everybody who is absolutely puzzled, throughout
+three continents, you are brought in contact with all that is
+strange and bizarre. But here"--I picked up the morning paper
+from the ground--"let us put it to a practical test. Here is the
+first heading upon which I come. 'A husband's cruelty to his
+wife.' There is half a column of print, but I know without
+reading it that it is all perfectly familiar to me. There is, of
+course, the other woman, the drink, the push, the blow, the
+bruise, the sympathetic sister or landlady. The crudest of
+writers could invent nothing more crude."
+
+"Indeed, your example is an unfortunate one for your argument,"
+said Holmes, taking the paper and glancing his eye down it. "This
+is the Dundas separation case, and, as it happens, I was engaged
+in clearing up some small points in connection with it. The
+husband was a teetotaler, there was no other woman, and the
+conduct complained of was that he had drifted into the habit of
+winding up every meal by taking out his false teeth and hurling
+them at his wife, which, you will allow, is not an action likely
+to occur to the imagination of the average story-teller. Take a
+pinch of snuff, Doctor, and acknowledge that I have scored over
+you in your example."
+
+He held out his snuffbox of old gold, with a great amethyst in
+the centre of the lid. Its splendour was in such contrast to his
+homely ways and simple life that I could not help commenting upon
+it.
+
+"Ah," said he, "I forgot that I had not seen you for some weeks.
+It is a little souvenir from the King of Bohemia in return for my
+assistance in the case of the Irene Adler papers."
+
+"And the ring?" I asked, glancing at a remarkable brilliant which
+sparkled upon his finger.
+
+"It was from the reigning family of Holland, though the matter in
+which I served them was of such delicacy that I cannot confide it
+even to you, who have been good enough to chronicle one or two of
+my little problems."
+
+"And have you any on hand just now?" I asked with interest.
+
+"Some ten or twelve, but none which present any feature of
+interest. They are important, you understand, without being
+interesting. Indeed, I have found that it is usually in
+unimportant matters that there is a field for the observation,
+and for the quick analysis of cause and effect which gives the
+charm to an investigation. The larger crimes are apt to be the
+simpler, for the bigger the crime the more obvious, as a rule, is
+the motive. In these cases, save for one rather intricate matter
+which has been referred to me from Marseilles, there is nothing
+which presents any features of interest. It is possible, however,
+that I may have something better before very many minutes are
+over, for this is one of my clients, or I am much mistaken."
+
+He had risen from his chair and was standing between the parted
+blinds gazing down into the dull neutral-tinted London street.
+Looking over his shoulder, I saw that on the pavement opposite
+there stood a large woman with a heavy fur boa round her neck,
+and a large curling red feather in a broad-brimmed hat which was
+tilted in a coquettish Duchess of Devonshire fashion over her
+ear. From under this great panoply she peeped up in a nervous,
+hesitating fashion at our windows, while her body oscillated
+backward and forward, and her fingers fidgeted with her glove
+buttons. Suddenly, with a plunge, as of the swimmer who leaves
+the bank, she hurried across the road, and we heard the sharp
+clang of the bell.
+
+"I have seen those symptoms before," said Holmes, throwing his
+cigarette into the fire. "Oscillation upon the pavement always
+means an affaire de coeur. She would like advice, but is not sure
+that the matter is not too delicate for communication. And yet
+even here we may discriminate. When a woman has been seriously
+wronged by a man she no longer oscillates, and the usual symptom
+is a broken bell wire. Here we may take it that there is a love
+matter, but that the maiden is not so much angry as perplexed, or
+grieved. But here she comes in person to resolve our doubts."
+
+As he spoke there was a tap at the door, and the boy in buttons
+entered to announce Miss Mary Sutherland, while the lady herself
+loomed behind his small black figure like a full-sailed
+merchant-man behind a tiny pilot boat. Sherlock Holmes welcomed
+her with the easy courtesy for which he was remarkable, and,
+having closed the door and bowed her into an armchair, he looked
+her over in the minute and yet abstracted fashion which was
+peculiar to him.
+
+"Do you not find," he said, "that with your short sight it is a
+little trying to do so much typewriting?"
+
+"I did at first," she answered, "but now I know where the letters
+are without looking." Then, suddenly realising the full purport
+of his words, she gave a violent start and looked up, with fear
+and astonishment upon her broad, good-humoured face. "You've
+heard about me, Mr. Holmes," she cried, "else how could you know
+all that?"
+
+"Never mind," said Holmes, laughing; "it is my business to know
+things. Perhaps I have trained myself to see what others
+overlook. If not, why should you come to consult me?"
+
+"I came to you, sir, because I heard of you from Mrs. Etherege,
+whose husband you found so easy when the police and everyone had
+given him up for dead. Oh, Mr. Holmes, I wish you would do as
+much for me. I'm not rich, but still I have a hundred a year in
+my own right, besides the little that I make by the machine, and
+I would give it all to know what has become of Mr. Hosmer Angel."
+
+"Why did you come away to consult me in such a hurry?" asked
+Sherlock Holmes, with his finger-tips together and his eyes to
+the ceiling.
+
+Again a startled look came over the somewhat vacuous face of Miss
+Mary Sutherland. "Yes, I did bang out of the house," she said,
+"for it made me angry to see the easy way in which Mr.
+Windibank--that is, my father--took it all. He would not go to
+the police, and he would not go to you, and so at last, as he
+would do nothing and kept on saying that there was no harm done,
+it made me mad, and I just on with my things and came right away
+to you."
+
+"Your father," said Holmes, "your stepfather, surely, since the
+name is different."
+
+"Yes, my stepfather. I call him father, though it sounds funny,
+too, for he is only five years and two months older than myself."
+
+"And your mother is alive?"
+
+"Oh, yes, mother is alive and well. I wasn't best pleased, Mr.
+Holmes, when she married again so soon after father's death, and
+a man who was nearly fifteen years younger than herself. Father
+was a plumber in the Tottenham Court Road, and he left a tidy
+business behind him, which mother carried on with Mr. Hardy, the
+foreman; but when Mr. Windibank came he made her sell the
+business, for he was very superior, being a traveller in wines.
+They got 4700 pounds for the goodwill and interest, which wasn't
+near as much as father could have got if he had been alive."
+
+I had expected to see Sherlock Holmes impatient under this
+rambling and inconsequential narrative, but, on the contrary, he
+had listened with the greatest concentration of attention.
+
+"Your own little income," he asked, "does it come out of the
+business?"
+
+"Oh, no, sir. It is quite separate and was left me by my uncle
+Ned in Auckland. It is in New Zealand stock, paying 4 1/2 per
+cent. Two thousand five hundred pounds was the amount, but I can
+only touch the interest."
+
+"You interest me extremely," said Holmes. "And since you draw so
+large a sum as a hundred a year, with what you earn into the
+bargain, you no doubt travel a little and indulge yourself in
+every way. I believe that a single lady can get on very nicely
+upon an income of about 60 pounds."
+
+"I could do with much less than that, Mr. Holmes, but you
+understand that as long as I live at home I don't wish to be a
+burden to them, and so they have the use of the money just while
+I am staying with them. Of course, that is only just for the
+time. Mr. Windibank draws my interest every quarter and pays it
+over to mother, and I find that I can do pretty well with what I
+earn at typewriting. It brings me twopence a sheet, and I can
+often do from fifteen to twenty sheets in a day."
+
+"You have made your position very clear to me," said Holmes.
+"This is my friend, Dr. Watson, before whom you can speak as
+freely as before myself. Kindly tell us now all about your
+connection with Mr. Hosmer Angel."
+
+A flush stole over Miss Sutherland's face, and she picked
+nervously at the fringe of her jacket. "I met him first at the
+gasfitters' ball," she said. "They used to send father tickets
+when he was alive, and then afterwards they remembered us, and
+sent them to mother. Mr. Windibank did not wish us to go. He
+never did wish us to go anywhere. He would get quite mad if I
+wanted so much as to join a Sunday-school treat. But this time I
+was set on going, and I would go; for what right had he to
+prevent? He said the folk were not fit for us to know, when all
+father's friends were to be there. And he said that I had nothing
+fit to wear, when I had my purple plush that I had never so much
+as taken out of the drawer. At last, when nothing else would do,
+he went off to France upon the business of the firm, but we went,
+mother and I, with Mr. Hardy, who used to be our foreman, and it
+was there I met Mr. Hosmer Angel."
+
+"I suppose," said Holmes, "that when Mr. Windibank came back from
+France he was very annoyed at your having gone to the ball."
+
+"Oh, well, he was very good about it. He laughed, I remember, and
+shrugged his shoulders, and said there was no use denying
+anything to a woman, for she would have her way."
+
+"I see. Then at the gasfitters' ball you met, as I understand, a
+gentleman called Mr. Hosmer Angel."
+
+"Yes, sir. I met him that night, and he called next day to ask if
+we had got home all safe, and after that we met him--that is to
+say, Mr. Holmes, I met him twice for walks, but after that father
+came back again, and Mr. Hosmer Angel could not come to the house
+any more."
+
+"No?"
+
+"Well, you know father didn't like anything of the sort. He
+wouldn't have any visitors if he could help it, and he used to
+say that a woman should be happy in her own family circle. But
+then, as I used to say to mother, a woman wants her own circle to
+begin with, and I had not got mine yet."
+
+"But how about Mr. Hosmer Angel? Did he make no attempt to see
+you?"
+
+"Well, father was going off to France again in a week, and Hosmer
+wrote and said that it would be safer and better not to see each
+other until he had gone. We could write in the meantime, and he
+used to write every day. I took the letters in in the morning, so
+there was no need for father to know."
+
+"Were you engaged to the gentleman at this time?"
+
+"Oh, yes, Mr. Holmes. We were engaged after the first walk that
+we took. Hosmer--Mr. Angel--was a cashier in an office in
+Leadenhall Street--and--"
+
+"What office?"
+
+"That's the worst of it, Mr. Holmes, I don't know."
+
+"Where did he live, then?"
+
+"He slept on the premises."
+
+"And you don't know his address?"
+
+"No--except that it was Leadenhall Street."
+
+"Where did you address your letters, then?"
+
+"To the Leadenhall Street Post Office, to be left till called
+for. He said that if they were sent to the office he would be
+chaffed by all the other clerks about having letters from a lady,
+so I offered to typewrite them, like he did his, but he wouldn't
+have that, for he said that when I wrote them they seemed to come
+from me, but when they were typewritten he always felt that the
+machine had come between us. That will just show you how fond he
+was of me, Mr. Holmes, and the little things that he would think
+of."
+
+"It was most suggestive," said Holmes. "It has long been an axiom
+of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.
+Can you remember any other little things about Mr. Hosmer Angel?"
+
+"He was a very shy man, Mr. Holmes. He would rather walk with me
+in the evening than in the daylight, for he said that he hated to
+be conspicuous. Very retiring and gentlemanly he was. Even his
+voice was gentle. He'd had the quinsy and swollen glands when he
+was young, he told me, and it had left him with a weak throat,
+and a hesitating, whispering fashion of speech. He was always
+well dressed, very neat and plain, but his eyes were weak, just
+as mine are, and he wore tinted glasses against the glare."
+
+"Well, and what happened when Mr. Windibank, your stepfather,
+returned to France?"
+
+"Mr. Hosmer Angel came to the house again and proposed that we
+should marry before father came back. He was in dreadful earnest
+and made me swear, with my hands on the Testament, that whatever
+happened I would always be true to him. Mother said he was quite
+right to make me swear, and that it was a sign of his passion.
+Mother was all in his favour from the first and was even fonder
+of him than I was. Then, when they talked of marrying within the
+week, I began to ask about father; but they both said never to
+mind about father, but just to tell him afterwards, and mother
+said she would make it all right with him. I didn't quite like
+that, Mr. Holmes. It seemed funny that I should ask his leave, as
+he was only a few years older than me; but I didn't want to do
+anything on the sly, so I wrote to father at Bordeaux, where the
+company has its French offices, but the letter came back to me on
+the very morning of the wedding."
+
+"It missed him, then?"
+
+"Yes, sir; for he had started to England just before it arrived."
+
+"Ha! that was unfortunate. Your wedding was arranged, then, for
+the Friday. Was it to be in church?"
+
+"Yes, sir, but very quietly. It was to be at St. Saviour's, near
+King's Cross, and we were to have breakfast afterwards at the St.
+Pancras Hotel. Hosmer came for us in a hansom, but as there were
+two of us he put us both into it and stepped himself into a
+four-wheeler, which happened to be the only other cab in the
+street. We got to the church first, and when the four-wheeler
+drove up we waited for him to step out, but he never did, and
+when the cabman got down from the box and looked there was no one
+there! The cabman said that he could not imagine what had become
+of him, for he had seen him get in with his own eyes. That was
+last Friday, Mr. Holmes, and I have never seen or heard anything
+since then to throw any light upon what became of him."
+
+"It seems to me that you have been very shamefully treated," said
+Holmes.
+
+"Oh, no, sir! He was too good and kind to leave me so. Why, all
+the morning he was saying to me that, whatever happened, I was to
+be true; and that even if something quite unforeseen occurred to
+separate us, I was always to remember that I was pledged to him,
+and that he would claim his pledge sooner or later. It seemed
+strange talk for a wedding-morning, but what has happened since
+gives a meaning to it."
+
+"Most certainly it does. Your own opinion is, then, that some
+unforeseen catastrophe has occurred to him?"
+
+"Yes, sir. I believe that he foresaw some danger, or else he
+would not have talked so. And then I think that what he foresaw
+happened."
+
+"But you have no notion as to what it could have been?"
+
+"None."
+
+"One more question. How did your mother take the matter?"
+
+"She was angry, and said that I was never to speak of the matter
+again."
+
+"And your father? Did you tell him?"
+
+"Yes; and he seemed to think, with me, that something had
+happened, and that I should hear of Hosmer again. As he said,
+what interest could anyone have in bringing me to the doors of
+the church, and then leaving me? Now, if he had borrowed my
+money, or if he had married me and got my money settled on him,
+there might be some reason, but Hosmer was very independent about
+money and never would look at a shilling of mine. And yet, what
+could have happened? And why could he not write? Oh, it drives me
+half-mad to think of it, and I can't sleep a wink at night." She
+pulled a little handkerchief out of her muff and began to sob
+heavily into it.
+
+"I shall glance into the case for you," said Holmes, rising, "and
+I have no doubt that we shall reach some definite result. Let the
+weight of the matter rest upon me now, and do not let your mind
+dwell upon it further. Above all, try to let Mr. Hosmer Angel
+vanish from your memory, as he has done from your life."
+
+"Then you don't think I'll see him again?"
+
+"I fear not."
+
+"Then what has happened to him?"
+
+"You will leave that question in my hands. I should like an
+accurate description of him and any letters of his which you can
+spare."
+
+"I advertised for him in last Saturday's Chronicle," said she.
+"Here is the slip and here are four letters from him."
+
+"Thank you. And your address?"
+
+"No. 31 Lyon Place, Camberwell."
+
+"Mr. Angel's address you never had, I understand. Where is your
+father's place of business?"
+
+"He travels for Westhouse & Marbank, the great claret importers
+of Fenchurch Street."
+
+"Thank you. You have made your statement very clearly. You will
+leave the papers here, and remember the advice which I have given
+you. Let the whole incident be a sealed book, and do not allow it
+to affect your life."
+
+"You are very kind, Mr. Holmes, but I cannot do that. I shall be
+true to Hosmer. He shall find me ready when he comes back."
+
+For all the preposterous hat and the vacuous face, there was
+something noble in the simple faith of our visitor which
+compelled our respect. She laid her little bundle of papers upon
+the table and went her way, with a promise to come again whenever
+she might be summoned.
+
+Sherlock Holmes sat silent for a few minutes with his fingertips
+still pressed together, his legs stretched out in front of him,
+and his gaze directed upward to the ceiling. Then he took down
+from the rack the old and oily clay pipe, which was to him as a
+counsellor, and, having lit it, he leaned back in his chair, with
+the thick blue cloud-wreaths spinning up from him, and a look of
+infinite languor in his face.
+
+"Quite an interesting study, that maiden," he observed. "I found
+her more interesting than her little problem, which, by the way,
+is rather a trite one. You will find parallel cases, if you
+consult my index, in Andover in '77, and there was something of
+the sort at The Hague last year. Old as is the idea, however,
+there were one or two details which were new to me. But the
+maiden herself was most instructive."
+
+"You appeared to read a good deal upon her which was quite
+invisible to me," I remarked.
+
+"Not invisible but unnoticed, Watson. You did not know where to
+look, and so you missed all that was important. I can never bring
+you to realise the importance of sleeves, the suggestiveness of
+thumb-nails, or the great issues that may hang from a boot-lace.
+Now, what did you gather from that woman's appearance? Describe
+it."
+
+"Well, she had a slate-coloured, broad-brimmed straw hat, with a
+feather of a brickish red. Her jacket was black, with black beads
+sewn upon it, and a fringe of little black jet ornaments. Her
+dress was brown, rather darker than coffee colour, with a little
+purple plush at the neck and sleeves. Her gloves were greyish and
+were worn through at the right forefinger. Her boots I didn't
+observe. She had small round, hanging gold earrings, and a
+general air of being fairly well-to-do in a vulgar, comfortable,
+easy-going way."
+
+Sherlock Holmes clapped his hands softly together and chuckled.
+
+"'Pon my word, Watson, you are coming along wonderfully. You have
+really done very well indeed. It is true that you have missed
+everything of importance, but you have hit upon the method, and
+you have a quick eye for colour. Never trust to general
+impressions, my boy, but concentrate yourself upon details. My
+first glance is always at a woman's sleeve. In a man it is
+perhaps better first to take the knee of the trouser. As you
+observe, this woman had plush upon her sleeves, which is a most
+useful material for showing traces. The double line a little
+above the wrist, where the typewritist presses against the table,
+was beautifully defined. The sewing-machine, of the hand type,
+leaves a similar mark, but only on the left arm, and on the side
+of it farthest from the thumb, instead of being right across the
+broadest part, as this was. I then glanced at her face, and,
+observing the dint of a pince-nez at either side of her nose, I
+ventured a remark upon short sight and typewriting, which seemed
+to surprise her."
+
+"It surprised me."
+
+"But, surely, it was obvious. I was then much surprised and
+interested on glancing down to observe that, though the boots
+which she was wearing were not unlike each other, they were
+really odd ones; the one having a slightly decorated toe-cap, and
+the other a plain one. One was buttoned only in the two lower
+buttons out of five, and the other at the first, third, and
+fifth. Now, when you see that a young lady, otherwise neatly
+dressed, has come away from home with odd boots, half-buttoned,
+it is no great deduction to say that she came away in a hurry."
+
+"And what else?" I asked, keenly interested, as I always was, by
+my friend's incisive reasoning.
+
+"I noted, in passing, that she had written a note before leaving
+home but after being fully dressed. You observed that her right
+glove was torn at the forefinger, but you did not apparently see
+that both glove and finger were stained with violet ink. She had
+written in a hurry and dipped her pen too deep. It must have been
+this morning, or the mark would not remain clear upon the finger.
+All this is amusing, though rather elementary, but I must go back
+to business, Watson. Would you mind reading me the advertised
+description of Mr. Hosmer Angel?"
+
+I held the little printed slip to the light.
+
+"Missing," it said, "on the morning of the fourteenth, a gentleman
+named Hosmer Angel. About five ft. seven in. in height;
+strongly built, sallow complexion, black hair, a little bald in
+the centre, bushy, black side-whiskers and moustache; tinted
+glasses, slight infirmity of speech. Was dressed, when last seen,
+in black frock-coat faced with silk, black waistcoat, gold Albert
+chain, and grey Harris tweed trousers, with brown gaiters over
+elastic-sided boots. Known to have been employed in an office in
+Leadenhall Street. Anybody bringing--"
+
+"That will do," said Holmes. "As to the letters," he continued,
+glancing over them, "they are very commonplace. Absolutely no
+clue in them to Mr. Angel, save that he quotes Balzac once. There
+is one remarkable point, however, which will no doubt strike
+you."
+
+"They are typewritten," I remarked.
+
+"Not only that, but the signature is typewritten. Look at the
+neat little 'Hosmer Angel' at the bottom. There is a date, you
+see, but no superscription except Leadenhall Street, which is
+rather vague. The point about the signature is very suggestive--in
+fact, we may call it conclusive."
+
+"Of what?"
+
+"My dear fellow, is it possible you do not see how strongly it
+bears upon the case?"
+
+"I cannot say that I do unless it were that he wished to be able
+to deny his signature if an action for breach of promise were
+instituted."
+
+"No, that was not the point. However, I shall write two letters,
+which should settle the matter. One is to a firm in the City, the
+other is to the young lady's stepfather, Mr. Windibank, asking
+him whether he could meet us here at six o'clock tomorrow
+evening. It is just as well that we should do business with the
+male relatives. And now, Doctor, we can do nothing until the
+answers to those letters come, so we may put our little problem
+upon the shelf for the interim."
+
+I had had so many reasons to believe in my friend's subtle powers
+of reasoning and extraordinary energy in action that I felt that
+he must have some solid grounds for the assured and easy
+demeanour with which he treated the singular mystery which he had
+been called upon to fathom. Once only had I known him to fail, in
+the case of the King of Bohemia and of the Irene Adler
+photograph; but when I looked back to the weird business of the
+Sign of Four, and the extraordinary circumstances connected with
+the Study in Scarlet, I felt that it would be a strange tangle
+indeed which he could not unravel.
+
+I left him then, still puffing at his black clay pipe, with the
+conviction that when I came again on the next evening I would
+find that he held in his hands all the clues which would lead up
+to the identity of the disappearing bridegroom of Miss Mary
+Sutherland.
+
+A professional case of great gravity was engaging my own
+attention at the time, and the whole of next day I was busy at
+the bedside of the sufferer. It was not until close upon six
+o'clock that I found myself free and was able to spring into a
+hansom and drive to Baker Street, half afraid that I might be too
+late to assist at the dénouement of the little mystery. I found
+Sherlock Holmes alone, however, half asleep, with his long, thin
+form curled up in the recesses of his armchair. A formidable
+array of bottles and test-tubes, with the pungent cleanly smell
+of hydrochloric acid, told me that he had spent his day in the
+chemical work which was so dear to him.
+
+"Well, have you solved it?" I asked as I entered.
+
+"Yes. It was the bisulphate of baryta."
+
+"No, no, the mystery!" I cried.
+
+"Oh, that! I thought of the salt that I have been working upon.
+There was never any mystery in the matter, though, as I said
+yesterday, some of the details are of interest. The only drawback
+is that there is no law, I fear, that can touch the scoundrel."
+
+"Who was he, then, and what was his object in deserting Miss
+Sutherland?"
+
+The question was hardly out of my mouth, and Holmes had not yet
+opened his lips to reply, when we heard a heavy footfall in the
+passage and a tap at the door.
+
+"This is the girl's stepfather, Mr. James Windibank," said
+Holmes. "He has written to me to say that he would be here at
+six. Come in!"
+
+The man who entered was a sturdy, middle-sized fellow, some
+thirty years of age, clean-shaven, and sallow-skinned, with a
+bland, insinuating manner, and a pair of wonderfully sharp and
+penetrating grey eyes. He shot a questioning glance at each of
+us, placed his shiny top-hat upon the sideboard, and with a
+slight bow sidled down into the nearest chair.
+
+"Good-evening, Mr. James Windibank," said Holmes. "I think that
+this typewritten letter is from you, in which you made an
+appointment with me for six o'clock?"
+
+"Yes, sir. I am afraid that I am a little late, but I am not
+quite my own master, you know. I am sorry that Miss Sutherland
+has troubled you about this little matter, for I think it is far
+better not to wash linen of the sort in public. It was quite
+against my wishes that she came, but she is a very excitable,
+impulsive girl, as you may have noticed, and she is not easily
+controlled when she has made up her mind on a point. Of course, I
+did not mind you so much, as you are not connected with the
+official police, but it is not pleasant to have a family
+misfortune like this noised abroad. Besides, it is a useless
+expense, for how could you possibly find this Hosmer Angel?"
+
+"On the contrary," said Holmes quietly; "I have every reason to
+believe that I will succeed in discovering Mr. Hosmer Angel."
+
+Mr. Windibank gave a violent start and dropped his gloves. "I am
+delighted to hear it," he said.
+
+"It is a curious thing," remarked Holmes, "that a typewriter has
+really quite as much individuality as a man's handwriting. Unless
+they are quite new, no two of them write exactly alike. Some
+letters get more worn than others, and some wear only on one
+side. Now, you remark in this note of yours, Mr. Windibank, that
+in every case there is some little slurring over of the 'e,' and
+a slight defect in the tail of the 'r.' There are fourteen other
+characteristics, but those are the more obvious."
+
+"We do all our correspondence with this machine at the office,
+and no doubt it is a little worn," our visitor answered, glancing
+keenly at Holmes with his bright little eyes.
+
+"And now I will show you what is really a very interesting study,
+Mr. Windibank," Holmes continued. "I think of writing another
+little monograph some of these days on the typewriter and its
+relation to crime. It is a subject to which I have devoted some
+little attention. I have here four letters which purport to come
+from the missing man. They are all typewritten. In each case, not
+only are the 'e's' slurred and the 'r's' tailless, but you will
+observe, if you care to use my magnifying lens, that the fourteen
+other characteristics to which I have alluded are there as well."
+
+Mr. Windibank sprang out of his chair and picked up his hat. "I
+cannot waste time over this sort of fantastic talk, Mr. Holmes,"
+he said. "If you can catch the man, catch him, and let me know
+when you have done it."
+
+"Certainly," said Holmes, stepping over and turning the key in
+the door. "I let you know, then, that I have caught him!"
+
+"What! where?" shouted Mr. Windibank, turning white to his lips
+and glancing about him like a rat in a trap.
+
+"Oh, it won't do--really it won't," said Holmes suavely. "There
+is no possible getting out of it, Mr. Windibank. It is quite too
+transparent, and it was a very bad compliment when you said that
+it was impossible for me to solve so simple a question. That's
+right! Sit down and let us talk it over."
+
+Our visitor collapsed into a chair, with a ghastly face and a
+glitter of moisture on his brow. "It--it's not actionable," he
+stammered.
+
+"I am very much afraid that it is not. But between ourselves,
+Windibank, it was as cruel and selfish and heartless a trick in a
+petty way as ever came before me. Now, let me just run over the
+course of events, and you will contradict me if I go wrong."
+
+The man sat huddled up in his chair, with his head sunk upon his
+breast, like one who is utterly crushed. Holmes stuck his feet up
+on the corner of the mantelpiece and, leaning back with his hands
+in his pockets, began talking, rather to himself, as it seemed,
+than to us.
+
+"The man married a woman very much older than himself for her
+money," said he, "and he enjoyed the use of the money of the
+daughter as long as she lived with them. It was a considerable
+sum, for people in their position, and the loss of it would have
+made a serious difference. It was worth an effort to preserve it.
+The daughter was of a good, amiable disposition, but affectionate
+and warm-hearted in her ways, so that it was evident that with
+her fair personal advantages, and her little income, she would
+not be allowed to remain single long. Now her marriage would
+mean, of course, the loss of a hundred a year, so what does her
+stepfather do to prevent it? He takes the obvious course of
+keeping her at home and forbidding her to seek the company of
+people of her own age. But soon he found that that would not
+answer forever. She became restive, insisted upon her rights, and
+finally announced her positive intention of going to a certain
+ball. What does her clever stepfather do then? He conceives an
+idea more creditable to his head than to his heart. With the
+connivance and assistance of his wife he disguised himself,
+covered those keen eyes with tinted glasses, masked the face with
+a moustache and a pair of bushy whiskers, sunk that clear voice
+into an insinuating whisper, and doubly secure on account of the
+girl's short sight, he appears as Mr. Hosmer Angel, and keeps off
+other lovers by making love himself."
+
+"It was only a joke at first," groaned our visitor. "We never
+thought that she would have been so carried away."
+
+"Very likely not. However that may be, the young lady was very
+decidedly carried away, and, having quite made up her mind that
+her stepfather was in France, the suspicion of treachery never
+for an instant entered her mind. She was flattered by the
+gentleman's attentions, and the effect was increased by the
+loudly expressed admiration of her mother. Then Mr. Angel began
+to call, for it was obvious that the matter should be pushed as
+far as it would go if a real effect were to be produced. There
+were meetings, and an engagement, which would finally secure the
+girl's affections from turning towards anyone else. But the
+deception could not be kept up forever. These pretended journeys
+to France were rather cumbrous. The thing to do was clearly to
+bring the business to an end in such a dramatic manner that it
+would leave a permanent impression upon the young lady's mind and
+prevent her from looking upon any other suitor for some time to
+come. Hence those vows of fidelity exacted upon a Testament, and
+hence also the allusions to a possibility of something happening
+on the very morning of the wedding. James Windibank wished Miss
+Sutherland to be so bound to Hosmer Angel, and so uncertain as to
+his fate, that for ten years to come, at any rate, she would not
+listen to another man. As far as the church door he brought her,
+and then, as he could go no farther, he conveniently vanished
+away by the old trick of stepping in at one door of a
+four-wheeler and out at the other. I think that was the chain of
+events, Mr. Windibank!"
+
+Our visitor had recovered something of his assurance while Holmes
+had been talking, and he rose from his chair now with a cold
+sneer upon his pale face.
+
+"It may be so, or it may not, Mr. Holmes," said he, "but if you
+are so very sharp you ought to be sharp enough to know that it is
+you who are breaking the law now, and not me. I have done nothing
+actionable from the first, but as long as you keep that door
+locked you lay yourself open to an action for assault and illegal
+constraint."
+
+"The law cannot, as you say, touch you," said Holmes, unlocking
+and throwing open the door, "yet there never was a man who
+deserved punishment more. If the young lady has a brother or a
+friend, he ought to lay a whip across your shoulders. By Jove!"
+he continued, flushing up at the sight of the bitter sneer upon
+the man's face, "it is not part of my duties to my client, but
+here's a hunting crop handy, and I think I shall just treat
+myself to--" He took two swift steps to the whip, but before he
+could grasp it there was a wild clatter of steps upon the stairs,
+the heavy hall door banged, and from the window we could see Mr.
+James Windibank running at the top of his speed down the road.
+
+"There's a cold-blooded scoundrel!" said Holmes, laughing, as he
+threw himself down into his chair once more. "That fellow will
+rise from crime to crime until he does something very bad, and
+ends on a gallows. The case has, in some respects, been not
+entirely devoid of interest."
+
+"I cannot now entirely see all the steps of your reasoning," I
+remarked.
+
+"Well, of course it was obvious from the first that this Mr.
+Hosmer Angel must have some strong object for his curious
+conduct, and it was equally clear that the only man who really
+profited by the incident, as far as we could see, was the
+stepfather. Then the fact that the two men were never together,
+but that the one always appeared when the other was away, was
+suggestive. So were the tinted spectacles and the curious voice,
+which both hinted at a disguise, as did the bushy whiskers. My
+suspicions were all confirmed by his peculiar action in
+typewriting his signature, which, of course, inferred that his
+handwriting was so familiar to her that she would recognise even
+the smallest sample of it. You see all these isolated facts,
+together with many minor ones, all pointed in the same
+direction."
+
+"And how did you verify them?"
+
+"Having once spotted my man, it was easy to get corroboration. I
+knew the firm for which this man worked. Having taken the printed
+description. I eliminated everything from it which could be the
+result of a disguise--the whiskers, the glasses, the voice, and I
+sent it to the firm, with a request that they would inform me
+whether it answered to the description of any of their
+travellers. I had already noticed the peculiarities of the
+typewriter, and I wrote to the man himself at his business
+address asking him if he would come here. As I expected, his
+reply was typewritten and revealed the same trivial but
+characteristic defects. The same post brought me a letter from
+Westhouse & Marbank, of Fenchurch Street, to say that the
+description tallied in every respect with that of their employé,
+James Windibank. Voilà tout!"
+
+"And Miss Sutherland?"
+
+"If I tell her she will not believe me. You may remember the old
+Persian saying, 'There is danger for him who taketh the tiger
+cub, and danger also for whoso snatches a delusion from a woman.'
+There is as much sense in Hafiz as in Horace, and as much
+knowledge of the world."
+
+
+
+ADVENTURE IV. THE BOSCOMBE VALLEY MYSTERY
+
+We were seated at breakfast one morning, my wife and I, when the
+maid brought in a telegram. It was from Sherlock Holmes and ran
+in this way:
+
+"Have you a couple of days to spare? Have just been wired for from
+the west of England in connection with Boscombe Valley tragedy.
+Shall be glad if you will come with me. Air and scenery perfect.
+Leave Paddington by the 11:15."
+
+"What do you say, dear?" said my wife, looking across at me.
+"Will you go?"
+
+"I really don't know what to say. I have a fairly long list at
+present."
+
+"Oh, Anstruther would do your work for you. You have been looking
+a little pale lately. I think that the change would do you good,
+and you are always so interested in Mr. Sherlock Holmes' cases."
+
+"I should be ungrateful if I were not, seeing what I gained
+through one of them," I answered. "But if I am to go, I must pack
+at once, for I have only half an hour."
+
+My experience of camp life in Afghanistan had at least had the
+effect of making me a prompt and ready traveller. My wants were
+few and simple, so that in less than the time stated I was in a
+cab with my valise, rattling away to Paddington Station. Sherlock
+Holmes was pacing up and down the platform, his tall, gaunt
+figure made even gaunter and taller by his long grey
+travelling-cloak and close-fitting cloth cap.
+
+"It is really very good of you to come, Watson," said he. "It
+makes a considerable difference to me, having someone with me on
+whom I can thoroughly rely. Local aid is always either worthless
+or else biassed. If you will keep the two corner seats I shall
+get the tickets."
+
+We had the carriage to ourselves save for an immense litter of
+papers which Holmes had brought with him. Among these he rummaged
+and read, with intervals of note-taking and of meditation, until
+we were past Reading. Then he suddenly rolled them all into a
+gigantic ball and tossed them up onto the rack.
+
+"Have you heard anything of the case?" he asked.
+
+"Not a word. I have not seen a paper for some days."
+
+"The London press has not had very full accounts. I have just
+been looking through all the recent papers in order to master the
+particulars. It seems, from what I gather, to be one of those
+simple cases which are so extremely difficult."
+
+"That sounds a little paradoxical."
+
+"But it is profoundly true. Singularity is almost invariably a
+clue. The more featureless and commonplace a crime is, the more
+difficult it is to bring it home. In this case, however, they
+have established a very serious case against the son of the
+murdered man."
+
+"It is a murder, then?"
+
+"Well, it is conjectured to be so. I shall take nothing for
+granted until I have the opportunity of looking personally into
+it. I will explain the state of things to you, as far as I have
+been able to understand it, in a very few words.
+
+"Boscombe Valley is a country district not very far from Ross, in
+Herefordshire. The largest landed proprietor in that part is a
+Mr. John Turner, who made his money in Australia and returned
+some years ago to the old country. One of the farms which he
+held, that of Hatherley, was let to Mr. Charles McCarthy, who was
+also an ex-Australian. The men had known each other in the
+colonies, so that it was not unnatural that when they came to
+settle down they should do so as near each other as possible.
+Turner was apparently the richer man, so McCarthy became his
+tenant but still remained, it seems, upon terms of perfect
+equality, as they were frequently together. McCarthy had one son,
+a lad of eighteen, and Turner had an only daughter of the same
+age, but neither of them had wives living. They appear to have
+avoided the society of the neighbouring English families and to
+have led retired lives, though both the McCarthys were fond of
+sport and were frequently seen at the race-meetings of the
+neighbourhood. McCarthy kept two servants--a man and a girl.
+Turner had a considerable household, some half-dozen at the
+least. That is as much as I have been able to gather about the
+families. Now for the facts.
+
+"On June 3rd, that is, on Monday last, McCarthy left his house at
+Hatherley about three in the afternoon and walked down to the
+Boscombe Pool, which is a small lake formed by the spreading out
+of the stream which runs down the Boscombe Valley. He had been
+out with his serving-man in the morning at Ross, and he had told
+the man that he must hurry, as he had an appointment of
+importance to keep at three. From that appointment he never came
+back alive.
+
+"From Hatherley Farm-house to the Boscombe Pool is a quarter of a
+mile, and two people saw him as he passed over this ground. One
+was an old woman, whose name is not mentioned, and the other was
+William Crowder, a game-keeper in the employ of Mr. Turner. Both
+these witnesses depose that Mr. McCarthy was walking alone. The
+game-keeper adds that within a few minutes of his seeing Mr.
+McCarthy pass he had seen his son, Mr. James McCarthy, going the
+same way with a gun under his arm. To the best of his belief, the
+father was actually in sight at the time, and the son was
+following him. He thought no more of the matter until he heard in
+the evening of the tragedy that had occurred.
+
+"The two McCarthys were seen after the time when William Crowder,
+the game-keeper, lost sight of them. The Boscombe Pool is thickly
+wooded round, with just a fringe of grass and of reeds round the
+edge. A girl of fourteen, Patience Moran, who is the daughter of
+the lodge-keeper of the Boscombe Valley estate, was in one of the
+woods picking flowers. She states that while she was there she
+saw, at the border of the wood and close by the lake, Mr.
+McCarthy and his son, and that they appeared to be having a
+violent quarrel. She heard Mr. McCarthy the elder using very
+strong language to his son, and she saw the latter raise up his
+hand as if to strike his father. She was so frightened by their
+violence that she ran away and told her mother when she reached
+home that she had left the two McCarthys quarrelling near
+Boscombe Pool, and that she was afraid that they were going to
+fight. She had hardly said the words when young Mr. McCarthy came
+running up to the lodge to say that he had found his father dead
+in the wood, and to ask for the help of the lodge-keeper. He was
+much excited, without either his gun or his hat, and his right
+hand and sleeve were observed to be stained with fresh blood. On
+following him they found the dead body stretched out upon the
+grass beside the pool. The head had been beaten in by repeated
+blows of some heavy and blunt weapon. The injuries were such as
+might very well have been inflicted by the butt-end of his son's
+gun, which was found lying on the grass within a few paces of the
+body. Under these circumstances the young man was instantly
+arrested, and a verdict of 'wilful murder' having been returned
+at the inquest on Tuesday, he was on Wednesday brought before the
+magistrates at Ross, who have referred the case to the next
+Assizes. Those are the main facts of the case as they came out
+before the coroner and the police-court."
+
+"I could hardly imagine a more damning case," I remarked. "If
+ever circumstantial evidence pointed to a criminal it does so
+here."
+
+"Circumstantial evidence is a very tricky thing," answered Holmes
+thoughtfully. "It may seem to point very straight to one thing,
+but if you shift your own point of view a little, you may find it
+pointing in an equally uncompromising manner to something
+entirely different. It must be confessed, however, that the case
+looks exceedingly grave against the young man, and it is very
+possible that he is indeed the culprit. There are several people
+in the neighbourhood, however, and among them Miss Turner, the
+daughter of the neighbouring landowner, who believe in his
+innocence, and who have retained Lestrade, whom you may recollect
+in connection with the Study in Scarlet, to work out the case in
+his interest. Lestrade, being rather puzzled, has referred the
+case to me, and hence it is that two middle-aged gentlemen are
+flying westward at fifty miles an hour instead of quietly
+digesting their breakfasts at home."
+
+"I am afraid," said I, "that the facts are so obvious that you
+will find little credit to be gained out of this case."
+
+"There is nothing more deceptive than an obvious fact," he
+answered, laughing. "Besides, we may chance to hit upon some
+other obvious facts which may have been by no means obvious to
+Mr. Lestrade. You know me too well to think that I am boasting
+when I say that I shall either confirm or destroy his theory by
+means which he is quite incapable of employing, or even of
+understanding. To take the first example to hand, I very clearly
+perceive that in your bedroom the window is upon the right-hand
+side, and yet I question whether Mr. Lestrade would have noted
+even so self-evident a thing as that."
+
+"How on earth--"
+
+"My dear fellow, I know you well. I know the military neatness
+which characterises you. You shave every morning, and in this
+season you shave by the sunlight; but since your shaving is less
+and less complete as we get farther back on the left side, until
+it becomes positively slovenly as we get round the angle of the
+jaw, it is surely very clear that that side is less illuminated
+than the other. I could not imagine a man of your habits looking
+at himself in an equal light and being satisfied with such a
+result. I only quote this as a trivial example of observation and
+inference. Therein lies my métier, and it is just possible that
+it may be of some service in the investigation which lies before
+us. There are one or two minor points which were brought out in
+the inquest, and which are worth considering."
+
+"What are they?"
+
+"It appears that his arrest did not take place at once, but after
+the return to Hatherley Farm. On the inspector of constabulary
+informing him that he was a prisoner, he remarked that he was not
+surprised to hear it, and that it was no more than his deserts.
+This observation of his had the natural effect of removing any
+traces of doubt which might have remained in the minds of the
+coroner's jury."
+
+"It was a confession," I ejaculated.
+
+"No, for it was followed by a protestation of innocence."
+
+"Coming on the top of such a damning series of events, it was at
+least a most suspicious remark."
+
+"On the contrary," said Holmes, "it is the brightest rift which I
+can at present see in the clouds. However innocent he might be,
+he could not be such an absolute imbecile as not to see that the
+circumstances were very black against him. Had he appeared
+surprised at his own arrest, or feigned indignation at it, I
+should have looked upon it as highly suspicious, because such
+surprise or anger would not be natural under the circumstances,
+and yet might appear to be the best policy to a scheming man. His
+frank acceptance of the situation marks him as either an innocent
+man, or else as a man of considerable self-restraint and
+firmness. As to his remark about his deserts, it was also not
+unnatural if you consider that he stood beside the dead body of
+his father, and that there is no doubt that he had that very day
+so far forgotten his filial duty as to bandy words with him, and
+even, according to the little girl whose evidence is so
+important, to raise his hand as if to strike him. The
+self-reproach and contrition which are displayed in his remark
+appear to me to be the signs of a healthy mind rather than of a
+guilty one."
+
+I shook my head. "Many men have been hanged on far slighter
+evidence," I remarked.
+
+"So they have. And many men have been wrongfully hanged."
+
+"What is the young man's own account of the matter?"
+
+"It is, I am afraid, not very encouraging to his supporters,
+though there are one or two points in it which are suggestive.
+You will find it here, and may read it for yourself."
+
+He picked out from his bundle a copy of the local Herefordshire
+paper, and having turned down the sheet he pointed out the
+paragraph in which the unfortunate young man had given his own
+statement of what had occurred. I settled myself down in the
+corner of the carriage and read it very carefully. It ran in this
+way:
+
+"Mr. James McCarthy, the only son of the deceased, was then called
+and gave evidence as follows: 'I had been away from home for
+three days at Bristol, and had only just returned upon the
+morning of last Monday, the 3rd. My father was absent from home at
+the time of my arrival, and I was informed by the maid that he
+had driven over to Ross with John Cobb, the groom. Shortly after
+my return I heard the wheels of his trap in the yard, and,
+looking out of my window, I saw him get out and walk rapidly out
+of the yard, though I was not aware in which direction he was
+going. I then took my gun and strolled out in the direction of
+the Boscombe Pool, with the intention of visiting the rabbit
+warren which is upon the other side. On my way I saw William
+Crowder, the game-keeper, as he had stated in his evidence; but
+he is mistaken in thinking that I was following my father. I had
+no idea that he was in front of me. When about a hundred yards
+from the pool I heard a cry of "Cooee!" which was a usual signal
+between my father and myself. I then hurried forward, and found
+him standing by the pool. He appeared to be much surprised at
+seeing me and asked me rather roughly what I was doing there. A
+conversation ensued which led to high words and almost to blows,
+for my father was a man of a very violent temper. Seeing that his
+passion was becoming ungovernable, I left him and returned
+towards Hatherley Farm. I had not gone more than 150 yards,
+however, when I heard a hideous outcry behind me, which caused me
+to run back again. I found my father expiring upon the ground,
+with his head terribly injured. I dropped my gun and held him in
+my arms, but he almost instantly expired. I knelt beside him for
+some minutes, and then made my way to Mr. Turner's lodge-keeper,
+his house being the nearest, to ask for assistance. I saw no one
+near my father when I returned, and I have no idea how he came by
+his injuries. He was not a popular man, being somewhat cold and
+forbidding in his manners, but he had, as far as I know, no
+active enemies. I know nothing further of the matter.'
+
+"The Coroner: Did your father make any statement to you before
+he died?
+
+"Witness: He mumbled a few words, but I could only catch some
+allusion to a rat.
+
+"The Coroner: What did you understand by that?
+
+"Witness: It conveyed no meaning to me. I thought that he was
+delirious.
+
+"The Coroner: What was the point upon which you and your father
+had this final quarrel?
+
+"Witness: I should prefer not to answer.
+
+"The Coroner: I am afraid that I must press it.
+
+"Witness: It is really impossible for me to tell you. I can
+assure you that it has nothing to do with the sad tragedy which
+followed.
+
+"The Coroner: That is for the court to decide. I need not point
+out to you that your refusal to answer will prejudice your case
+considerably in any future proceedings which may arise.
+
+"Witness: I must still refuse.
+
+"The Coroner: I understand that the cry of 'Cooee' was a common
+signal between you and your father?
+
+"Witness: It was.
+
+"The Coroner: How was it, then, that he uttered it before he saw
+you, and before he even knew that you had returned from Bristol?
+
+"Witness (with considerable confusion): I do not know.
+
+"A Juryman: Did you see nothing which aroused your suspicions
+when you returned on hearing the cry and found your father
+fatally injured?
+
+"Witness: Nothing definite.
+
+"The Coroner: What do you mean?
+
+"Witness: I was so disturbed and excited as I rushed out into
+the open, that I could think of nothing except of my father. Yet
+I have a vague impression that as I ran forward something lay
+upon the ground to the left of me. It seemed to me to be
+something grey in colour, a coat of some sort, or a plaid perhaps.
+When I rose from my father I looked round for it, but it was
+gone.
+
+"'Do you mean that it disappeared before you went for help?'
+
+"'Yes, it was gone.'
+
+"'You cannot say what it was?'
+
+"'No, I had a feeling something was there.'
+
+"'How far from the body?'
+
+"'A dozen yards or so.'
+
+"'And how far from the edge of the wood?'
+
+"'About the same.'
+
+"'Then if it was removed it was while you were within a dozen
+yards of it?'
+
+"'Yes, but with my back towards it.'
+
+"This concluded the examination of the witness."
+
+"I see," said I as I glanced down the column, "that the coroner
+in his concluding remarks was rather severe upon young McCarthy.
+He calls attention, and with reason, to the discrepancy about his
+father having signalled to him before seeing him, also to his
+refusal to give details of his conversation with his father, and
+his singular account of his father's dying words. They are all,
+as he remarks, very much against the son."
+
+Holmes laughed softly to himself and stretched himself out upon
+the cushioned seat. "Both you and the coroner have been at some
+pains," said he, "to single out the very strongest points in the
+young man's favour. Don't you see that you alternately give him
+credit for having too much imagination and too little? Too
+little, if he could not invent a cause of quarrel which would
+give him the sympathy of the jury; too much, if he evolved from
+his own inner consciousness anything so outré as a dying
+reference to a rat, and the incident of the vanishing cloth. No,
+sir, I shall approach this case from the point of view that what
+this young man says is true, and we shall see whither that
+hypothesis will lead us. And now here is my pocket Petrarch, and
+not another word shall I say of this case until we are on the
+scene of action. We lunch at Swindon, and I see that we shall be
+there in twenty minutes."
+
+It was nearly four o'clock when we at last, after passing through
+the beautiful Stroud Valley, and over the broad gleaming Severn,
+found ourselves at the pretty little country-town of Ross. A
+lean, ferret-like man, furtive and sly-looking, was waiting for
+us upon the platform. In spite of the light brown dustcoat and
+leather-leggings which he wore in deference to his rustic
+surroundings, I had no difficulty in recognising Lestrade, of
+Scotland Yard. With him we drove to the Hereford Arms where a
+room had already been engaged for us.
+
+"I have ordered a carriage," said Lestrade as we sat over a cup
+of tea. "I knew your energetic nature, and that you would not be
+happy until you had been on the scene of the crime."
+
+"It was very nice and complimentary of you," Holmes answered. "It
+is entirely a question of barometric pressure."
+
+Lestrade looked startled. "I do not quite follow," he said.
+
+"How is the glass? Twenty-nine, I see. No wind, and not a cloud
+in the sky. I have a caseful of cigarettes here which need
+smoking, and the sofa is very much superior to the usual country
+hotel abomination. I do not think that it is probable that I
+shall use the carriage to-night."
+
+Lestrade laughed indulgently. "You have, no doubt, already formed
+your conclusions from the newspapers," he said. "The case is as
+plain as a pikestaff, and the more one goes into it the plainer
+it becomes. Still, of course, one can't refuse a lady, and such a
+very positive one, too. She has heard of you, and would have your
+opinion, though I repeatedly told her that there was nothing
+which you could do which I had not already done. Why, bless my
+soul! here is her carriage at the door."
+
+He had hardly spoken before there rushed into the room one of the
+most lovely young women that I have ever seen in my life. Her
+violet eyes shining, her lips parted, a pink flush upon her
+cheeks, all thought of her natural reserve lost in her
+overpowering excitement and concern.
+
+"Oh, Mr. Sherlock Holmes!" she cried, glancing from one to the
+other of us, and finally, with a woman's quick intuition,
+fastening upon my companion, "I am so glad that you have come. I
+have driven down to tell you so. I know that James didn't do it.
+I know it, and I want you to start upon your work knowing it,
+too. Never let yourself doubt upon that point. We have known each
+other since we were little children, and I know his faults as no
+one else does; but he is too tender-hearted to hurt a fly. Such a
+charge is absurd to anyone who really knows him."
+
+"I hope we may clear him, Miss Turner," said Sherlock Holmes.
+"You may rely upon my doing all that I can."
+
+"But you have read the evidence. You have formed some conclusion?
+Do you not see some loophole, some flaw? Do you not yourself
+think that he is innocent?"
+
+"I think that it is very probable."
+
+"There, now!" she cried, throwing back her head and looking
+defiantly at Lestrade. "You hear! He gives me hopes."
+
+Lestrade shrugged his shoulders. "I am afraid that my colleague
+has been a little quick in forming his conclusions," he said.
+
+"But he is right. Oh! I know that he is right. James never did
+it. And about his quarrel with his father, I am sure that the
+reason why he would not speak about it to the coroner was because
+I was concerned in it."
+
+"In what way?" asked Holmes.
+
+"It is no time for me to hide anything. James and his father had
+many disagreements about me. Mr. McCarthy was very anxious that
+there should be a marriage between us. James and I have always
+loved each other as brother and sister; but of course he is young
+and has seen very little of life yet, and--and--well, he
+naturally did not wish to do anything like that yet. So there
+were quarrels, and this, I am sure, was one of them."
+
+"And your father?" asked Holmes. "Was he in favour of such a
+union?"
+
+"No, he was averse to it also. No one but Mr. McCarthy was in
+favour of it." A quick blush passed over her fresh young face as
+Holmes shot one of his keen, questioning glances at her.
+
+"Thank you for this information," said he. "May I see your father
+if I call to-morrow?"
+
+"I am afraid the doctor won't allow it."
+
+"The doctor?"
+
+"Yes, have you not heard? Poor father has never been strong for
+years back, but this has broken him down completely. He has taken
+to his bed, and Dr. Willows says that he is a wreck and that his
+nervous system is shattered. Mr. McCarthy was the only man alive
+who had known dad in the old days in Victoria."
+
+"Ha! In Victoria! That is important."
+
+"Yes, at the mines."
+
+"Quite so; at the gold-mines, where, as I understand, Mr. Turner
+made his money."
+
+"Yes, certainly."
+
+"Thank you, Miss Turner. You have been of material assistance to
+me."
+
+"You will tell me if you have any news to-morrow. No doubt you
+will go to the prison to see James. Oh, if you do, Mr. Holmes, do
+tell him that I know him to be innocent."
+
+"I will, Miss Turner."
+
+"I must go home now, for dad is very ill, and he misses me so if
+I leave him. Good-bye, and God help you in your undertaking." She
+hurried from the room as impulsively as she had entered, and we
+heard the wheels of her carriage rattle off down the street.
+
+"I am ashamed of you, Holmes," said Lestrade with dignity after a
+few minutes' silence. "Why should you raise up hopes which you
+are bound to disappoint? I am not over-tender of heart, but I
+call it cruel."
+
+"I think that I see my way to clearing James McCarthy," said
+Holmes. "Have you an order to see him in prison?"
+
+"Yes, but only for you and me."
+
+"Then I shall reconsider my resolution about going out. We have
+still time to take a train to Hereford and see him to-night?"
+
+"Ample."
+
+"Then let us do so. Watson, I fear that you will find it very
+slow, but I shall only be away a couple of hours."
+
+I walked down to the station with them, and then wandered through
+the streets of the little town, finally returning to the hotel,
+where I lay upon the sofa and tried to interest myself in a
+yellow-backed novel. The puny plot of the story was so thin,
+however, when compared to the deep mystery through which we were
+groping, and I found my attention wander so continually from the
+action to the fact, that I at last flung it across the room and
+gave myself up entirely to a consideration of the events of the
+day. Supposing that this unhappy young man's story were
+absolutely true, then what hellish thing, what absolutely
+unforeseen and extraordinary calamity could have occurred between
+the time when he parted from his father, and the moment when,
+drawn back by his screams, he rushed into the glade? It was
+something terrible and deadly. What could it be? Might not the
+nature of the injuries reveal something to my medical instincts?
+I rang the bell and called for the weekly county paper, which
+contained a verbatim account of the inquest. In the surgeon's
+deposition it was stated that the posterior third of the left
+parietal bone and the left half of the occipital bone had been
+shattered by a heavy blow from a blunt weapon. I marked the spot
+upon my own head. Clearly such a blow must have been struck from
+behind. That was to some extent in favour of the accused, as when
+seen quarrelling he was face to face with his father. Still, it
+did not go for very much, for the older man might have turned his
+back before the blow fell. Still, it might be worth while to call
+Holmes' attention to it. Then there was the peculiar dying
+reference to a rat. What could that mean? It could not be
+delirium. A man dying from a sudden blow does not commonly become
+delirious. No, it was more likely to be an attempt to explain how
+he met his fate. But what could it indicate? I cudgelled my
+brains to find some possible explanation. And then the incident
+of the grey cloth seen by young McCarthy. If that were true the
+murderer must have dropped some part of his dress, presumably his
+overcoat, in his flight, and must have had the hardihood to
+return and to carry it away at the instant when the son was
+kneeling with his back turned not a dozen paces off. What a
+tissue of mysteries and improbabilities the whole thing was! I
+did not wonder at Lestrade's opinion, and yet I had so much faith
+in Sherlock Holmes' insight that I could not lose hope as long
+as every fresh fact seemed to strengthen his conviction of young
+McCarthy's innocence.
+
+It was late before Sherlock Holmes returned. He came back alone,
+for Lestrade was staying in lodgings in the town.
+
+"The glass still keeps very high," he remarked as he sat down.
+"It is of importance that it should not rain before we are able
+to go over the ground. On the other hand, a man should be at his
+very best and keenest for such nice work as that, and I did not
+wish to do it when fagged by a long journey. I have seen young
+McCarthy."
+
+"And what did you learn from him?"
+
+"Nothing."
+
+"Could he throw no light?"
+
+"None at all. I was inclined to think at one time that he knew
+who had done it and was screening him or her, but I am convinced
+now that he is as puzzled as everyone else. He is not a very
+quick-witted youth, though comely to look at and, I should think,
+sound at heart."
+
+"I cannot admire his taste," I remarked, "if it is indeed a fact
+that he was averse to a marriage with so charming a young lady as
+this Miss Turner."
+
+"Ah, thereby hangs a rather painful tale. This fellow is madly,
+insanely, in love with her, but some two years ago, when he was
+only a lad, and before he really knew her, for she had been away
+five years at a boarding-school, what does the idiot do but get
+into the clutches of a barmaid in Bristol and marry her at a
+registry office? No one knows a word of the matter, but you can
+imagine how maddening it must be to him to be upbraided for not
+doing what he would give his very eyes to do, but what he knows
+to be absolutely impossible. It was sheer frenzy of this sort
+which made him throw his hands up into the air when his father,
+at their last interview, was goading him on to propose to Miss
+Turner. On the other hand, he had no means of supporting himself,
+and his father, who was by all accounts a very hard man, would
+have thrown him over utterly had he known the truth. It was with
+his barmaid wife that he had spent the last three days in
+Bristol, and his father did not know where he was. Mark that
+point. It is of importance. Good has come out of evil, however,
+for the barmaid, finding from the papers that he is in serious
+trouble and likely to be hanged, has thrown him over utterly and
+has written to him to say that she has a husband already in the
+Bermuda Dockyard, so that there is really no tie between them. I
+think that that bit of news has consoled young McCarthy for all
+that he has suffered."
+
+"But if he is innocent, who has done it?"
+
+"Ah! who? I would call your attention very particularly to two
+points. One is that the murdered man had an appointment with
+someone at the pool, and that the someone could not have been his
+son, for his son was away, and he did not know when he would
+return. The second is that the murdered man was heard to cry
+'Cooee!' before he knew that his son had returned. Those are the
+crucial points upon which the case depends. And now let us talk
+about George Meredith, if you please, and we shall leave all
+minor matters until to-morrow."
+
+There was no rain, as Holmes had foretold, and the morning broke
+bright and cloudless. At nine o'clock Lestrade called for us with
+the carriage, and we set off for Hatherley Farm and the Boscombe
+Pool.
+
+"There is serious news this morning," Lestrade observed. "It is
+said that Mr. Turner, of the Hall, is so ill that his life is
+despaired of."
+
+"An elderly man, I presume?" said Holmes.
+
+"About sixty; but his constitution has been shattered by his life
+abroad, and he has been in failing health for some time. This
+business has had a very bad effect upon him. He was an old friend
+of McCarthy's, and, I may add, a great benefactor to him, for I
+have learned that he gave him Hatherley Farm rent free."
+
+"Indeed! That is interesting," said Holmes.
+
+"Oh, yes! In a hundred other ways he has helped him. Everybody
+about here speaks of his kindness to him."
+
+"Really! Does it not strike you as a little singular that this
+McCarthy, who appears to have had little of his own, and to have
+been under such obligations to Turner, should still talk of
+marrying his son to Turner's daughter, who is, presumably,
+heiress to the estate, and that in such a very cocksure manner,
+as if it were merely a case of a proposal and all else would
+follow? It is the more strange, since we know that Turner himself
+was averse to the idea. The daughter told us as much. Do you not
+deduce something from that?"
+
+"We have got to the deductions and the inferences," said
+Lestrade, winking at me. "I find it hard enough to tackle facts,
+Holmes, without flying away after theories and fancies."
+
+"You are right," said Holmes demurely; "you do find it very hard
+to tackle the facts."
+
+"Anyhow, I have grasped one fact which you seem to find it
+difficult to get hold of," replied Lestrade with some warmth.
+
+"And that is--"
+
+"That McCarthy senior met his death from McCarthy junior and that
+all theories to the contrary are the merest moonshine."
+
+"Well, moonshine is a brighter thing than fog," said Holmes,
+laughing. "But I am very much mistaken if this is not Hatherley
+Farm upon the left."
+
+"Yes, that is it." It was a widespread, comfortable-looking
+building, two-storied, slate-roofed, with great yellow blotches
+of lichen upon the grey walls. The drawn blinds and the smokeless
+chimneys, however, gave it a stricken look, as though the weight
+of this horror still lay heavy upon it. We called at the door,
+when the maid, at Holmes' request, showed us the boots which her
+master wore at the time of his death, and also a pair of the
+son's, though not the pair which he had then had. Having measured
+these very carefully from seven or eight different points, Holmes
+desired to be led to the court-yard, from which we all followed
+the winding track which led to Boscombe Pool.
+
+Sherlock Holmes was transformed when he was hot upon such a scent
+as this. Men who had only known the quiet thinker and logician of
+Baker Street would have failed to recognise him. His face flushed
+and darkened. His brows were drawn into two hard black lines,
+while his eyes shone out from beneath them with a steely glitter.
+His face was bent downward, his shoulders bowed, his lips
+compressed, and the veins stood out like whipcord in his long,
+sinewy neck. His nostrils seemed to dilate with a purely animal
+lust for the chase, and his mind was so absolutely concentrated
+upon the matter before him that a question or remark fell
+unheeded upon his ears, or, at the most, only provoked a quick,
+impatient snarl in reply. Swiftly and silently he made his way
+along the track which ran through the meadows, and so by way of
+the woods to the Boscombe Pool. It was damp, marshy ground, as is
+all that district, and there were marks of many feet, both upon
+the path and amid the short grass which bounded it on either
+side. Sometimes Holmes would hurry on, sometimes stop dead, and
+once he made quite a little detour into the meadow. Lestrade and
+I walked behind him, the detective indifferent and contemptuous,
+while I watched my friend with the interest which sprang from the
+conviction that every one of his actions was directed towards a
+definite end.
+
+The Boscombe Pool, which is a little reed-girt sheet of water
+some fifty yards across, is situated at the boundary between the
+Hatherley Farm and the private park of the wealthy Mr. Turner.
+Above the woods which lined it upon the farther side we could see
+the red, jutting pinnacles which marked the site of the rich
+landowner's dwelling. On the Hatherley side of the pool the woods
+grew very thick, and there was a narrow belt of sodden grass
+twenty paces across between the edge of the trees and the reeds
+which lined the lake. Lestrade showed us the exact spot at which
+the body had been found, and, indeed, so moist was the ground,
+that I could plainly see the traces which had been left by the
+fall of the stricken man. To Holmes, as I could see by his eager
+face and peering eyes, very many other things were to be read
+upon the trampled grass. He ran round, like a dog who is picking
+up a scent, and then turned upon my companion.
+
+"What did you go into the pool for?" he asked.
+
+"I fished about with a rake. I thought there might be some weapon
+or other trace. But how on earth--"
+
+"Oh, tut, tut! I have no time! That left foot of yours with its
+inward twist is all over the place. A mole could trace it, and
+there it vanishes among the reeds. Oh, how simple it would all
+have been had I been here before they came like a herd of buffalo
+and wallowed all over it. Here is where the party with the
+lodge-keeper came, and they have covered all tracks for six or
+eight feet round the body. But here are three separate tracks of
+the same feet." He drew out a lens and lay down upon his
+waterproof to have a better view, talking all the time rather to
+himself than to us. "These are young McCarthy's feet. Twice he
+was walking, and once he ran swiftly, so that the soles are
+deeply marked and the heels hardly visible. That bears out his
+story. He ran when he saw his father on the ground. Then here are
+the father's feet as he paced up and down. What is this, then? It
+is the butt-end of the gun as the son stood listening. And this?
+Ha, ha! What have we here? Tiptoes! tiptoes! Square, too, quite
+unusual boots! They come, they go, they come again--of course
+that was for the cloak. Now where did they come from?" He ran up
+and down, sometimes losing, sometimes finding the track until we
+were well within the edge of the wood and under the shadow of a
+great beech, the largest tree in the neighbourhood. Holmes traced
+his way to the farther side of this and lay down once more upon
+his face with a little cry of satisfaction. For a long time he
+remained there, turning over the leaves and dried sticks,
+gathering up what seemed to me to be dust into an envelope and
+examining with his lens not only the ground but even the bark of
+the tree as far as he could reach. A jagged stone was lying among
+the moss, and this also he carefully examined and retained. Then
+he followed a pathway through the wood until he came to the
+highroad, where all traces were lost.
+
+"It has been a case of considerable interest," he remarked,
+returning to his natural manner. "I fancy that this grey house on
+the right must be the lodge. I think that I will go in and have a
+word with Moran, and perhaps write a little note. Having done
+that, we may drive back to our luncheon. You may walk to the cab,
+and I shall be with you presently."
+
+It was about ten minutes before we regained our cab and drove
+back into Ross, Holmes still carrying with him the stone which he
+had picked up in the wood.
+
+"This may interest you, Lestrade," he remarked, holding it out.
+"The murder was done with it."
+
+"I see no marks."
+
+"There are none."
+
+"How do you know, then?"
+
+"The grass was growing under it. It had only lain there a few
+days. There was no sign of a place whence it had been taken. It
+corresponds with the injuries. There is no sign of any other
+weapon."
+
+"And the murderer?"
+
+"Is a tall man, left-handed, limps with the right leg, wears
+thick-soled shooting-boots and a grey cloak, smokes Indian
+cigars, uses a cigar-holder, and carries a blunt pen-knife in his
+pocket. There are several other indications, but these may be
+enough to aid us in our search."
+
+Lestrade laughed. "I am afraid that I am still a sceptic," he
+said. "Theories are all very well, but we have to deal with a
+hard-headed British jury."
+
+"Nous verrons," answered Holmes calmly. "You work your own
+method, and I shall work mine. I shall be busy this afternoon,
+and shall probably return to London by the evening train."
+
+"And leave your case unfinished?"
+
+"No, finished."
+
+"But the mystery?"
+
+"It is solved."
+
+"Who was the criminal, then?"
+
+"The gentleman I describe."
+
+"But who is he?"
+
+"Surely it would not be difficult to find out. This is not such a
+populous neighbourhood."
+
+Lestrade shrugged his shoulders. "I am a practical man," he said,
+"and I really cannot undertake to go about the country looking
+for a left-handed gentleman with a game leg. I should become the
+laughing-stock of Scotland Yard."
+
+"All right," said Holmes quietly. "I have given you the chance.
+Here are your lodgings. Good-bye. I shall drop you a line before
+I leave."
+
+Having left Lestrade at his rooms, we drove to our hotel, where
+we found lunch upon the table. Holmes was silent and buried in
+thought with a pained expression upon his face, as one who finds
+himself in a perplexing position.
+
+"Look here, Watson," he said when the cloth was cleared "just sit
+down in this chair and let me preach to you for a little. I don't
+know quite what to do, and I should value your advice. Light a
+cigar and let me expound."
+
+ "Pray do so."
+
+"Well, now, in considering this case there are two points about
+young McCarthy's narrative which struck us both instantly,
+although they impressed me in his favour and you against him. One
+was the fact that his father should, according to his account,
+cry 'Cooee!' before seeing him. The other was his singular dying
+reference to a rat. He mumbled several words, you understand, but
+that was all that caught the son's ear. Now from this double
+point our research must commence, and we will begin it by
+presuming that what the lad says is absolutely true."
+
+"What of this 'Cooee!' then?"
+
+"Well, obviously it could not have been meant for the son. The
+son, as far as he knew, was in Bristol. It was mere chance that
+he was within earshot. The 'Cooee!' was meant to attract the
+attention of whoever it was that he had the appointment with. But
+'Cooee' is a distinctly Australian cry, and one which is used
+between Australians. There is a strong presumption that the
+person whom McCarthy expected to meet him at Boscombe Pool was
+someone who had been in Australia."
+
+"What of the rat, then?"
+
+Sherlock Holmes took a folded paper from his pocket and flattened
+it out on the table. "This is a map of the Colony of Victoria,"
+he said. "I wired to Bristol for it last night." He put his hand
+over part of the map. "What do you read?"
+
+"ARAT," I read.
+
+"And now?" He raised his hand.
+
+"BALLARAT."
+
+"Quite so. That was the word the man uttered, and of which his
+son only caught the last two syllables. He was trying to utter
+the name of his murderer. So and so, of Ballarat."
+
+"It is wonderful!" I exclaimed.
+
+"It is obvious. And now, you see, I had narrowed the field down
+considerably. The possession of a grey garment was a third point
+which, granting the son's statement to be correct, was a
+certainty. We have come now out of mere vagueness to the definite
+conception of an Australian from Ballarat with a grey cloak."
+
+"Certainly."
+
+"And one who was at home in the district, for the pool can only
+be approached by the farm or by the estate, where strangers could
+hardly wander."
+
+"Quite so."
+
+"Then comes our expedition of to-day. By an examination of the
+ground I gained the trifling details which I gave to that
+imbecile Lestrade, as to the personality of the criminal."
+
+"But how did you gain them?"
+
+"You know my method. It is founded upon the observation of
+trifles."
+
+"His height I know that you might roughly judge from the length
+of his stride. His boots, too, might be told from their traces."
+
+"Yes, they were peculiar boots."
+
+"But his lameness?"
+
+"The impression of his right foot was always less distinct than
+his left. He put less weight upon it. Why? Because he limped--he
+was lame."
+
+"But his left-handedness."
+
+"You were yourself struck by the nature of the injury as recorded
+by the surgeon at the inquest. The blow was struck from
+immediately behind, and yet was upon the left side. Now, how can
+that be unless it were by a left-handed man? He had stood behind
+that tree during the interview between the father and son. He had
+even smoked there. I found the ash of a cigar, which my special
+knowledge of tobacco ashes enables me to pronounce as an Indian
+cigar. I have, as you know, devoted some attention to this, and
+written a little monograph on the ashes of 140 different
+varieties of pipe, cigar, and cigarette tobacco. Having found the
+ash, I then looked round and discovered the stump among the moss
+where he had tossed it. It was an Indian cigar, of the variety
+which are rolled in Rotterdam."
+
+"And the cigar-holder?"
+
+"I could see that the end had not been in his mouth. Therefore he
+used a holder. The tip had been cut off, not bitten off, but the
+cut was not a clean one, so I deduced a blunt pen-knife."
+
+"Holmes," I said, "you have drawn a net round this man from which
+he cannot escape, and you have saved an innocent human life as
+truly as if you had cut the cord which was hanging him. I see the
+direction in which all this points. The culprit is--"
+
+"Mr. John Turner," cried the hotel waiter, opening the door of
+our sitting-room, and ushering in a visitor.
+
+The man who entered was a strange and impressive figure. His
+slow, limping step and bowed shoulders gave the appearance of
+decrepitude, and yet his hard, deep-lined, craggy features, and
+his enormous limbs showed that he was possessed of unusual
+strength of body and of character. His tangled beard, grizzled
+hair, and outstanding, drooping eyebrows combined to give an air
+of dignity and power to his appearance, but his face was of an
+ashen white, while his lips and the corners of his nostrils were
+tinged with a shade of blue. It was clear to me at a glance that
+he was in the grip of some deadly and chronic disease.
+
+"Pray sit down on the sofa," said Holmes gently. "You had my
+note?"
+
+"Yes, the lodge-keeper brought it up. You said that you wished to
+see me here to avoid scandal."
+
+"I thought people would talk if I went to the Hall."
+
+"And why did you wish to see me?" He looked across at my
+companion with despair in his weary eyes, as though his question
+was already answered.
+
+"Yes," said Holmes, answering the look rather than the words. "It
+is so. I know all about McCarthy."
+
+The old man sank his face in his hands. "God help me!" he cried.
+"But I would not have let the young man come to harm. I give you
+my word that I would have spoken out if it went against him at
+the Assizes."
+
+"I am glad to hear you say so," said Holmes gravely.
+
+"I would have spoken now had it not been for my dear girl. It
+would break her heart--it will break her heart when she hears
+that I am arrested."
+
+"It may not come to that," said Holmes.
+
+"What?"
+
+"I am no official agent. I understand that it was your daughter
+who required my presence here, and I am acting in her interests.
+Young McCarthy must be got off, however."
+
+"I am a dying man," said old Turner. "I have had diabetes for
+years. My doctor says it is a question whether I shall live a
+month. Yet I would rather die under my own roof than in a gaol."
+
+Holmes rose and sat down at the table with his pen in his hand
+and a bundle of paper before him. "Just tell us the truth," he
+said. "I shall jot down the facts. You will sign it, and Watson
+here can witness it. Then I could produce your confession at the
+last extremity to save young McCarthy. I promise you that I shall
+not use it unless it is absolutely needed."
+
+"It's as well," said the old man; "it's a question whether I
+shall live to the Assizes, so it matters little to me, but I
+should wish to spare Alice the shock. And now I will make the
+thing clear to you; it has been a long time in the acting, but
+will not take me long to tell.
+
+"You didn't know this dead man, McCarthy. He was a devil
+incarnate. I tell you that. God keep you out of the clutches of
+such a man as he. His grip has been upon me these twenty years,
+and he has blasted my life. I'll tell you first how I came to be
+in his power.
+
+"It was in the early '60's at the diggings. I was a young chap
+then, hot-blooded and reckless, ready to turn my hand at
+anything; I got among bad companions, took to drink, had no luck
+with my claim, took to the bush, and in a word became what you
+would call over here a highway robber. There were six of us, and
+we had a wild, free life of it, sticking up a station from time
+to time, or stopping the wagons on the road to the diggings.
+Black Jack of Ballarat was the name I went under, and our party
+is still remembered in the colony as the Ballarat Gang.
+
+"One day a gold convoy came down from Ballarat to Melbourne, and
+we lay in wait for it and attacked it. There were six troopers
+and six of us, so it was a close thing, but we emptied four of
+their saddles at the first volley. Three of our boys were killed,
+however, before we got the swag. I put my pistol to the head of
+the wagon-driver, who was this very man McCarthy. I wish to the
+Lord that I had shot him then, but I spared him, though I saw his
+wicked little eyes fixed on my face, as though to remember every
+feature. We got away with the gold, became wealthy men, and made
+our way over to England without being suspected. There I parted
+from my old pals and determined to settle down to a quiet and
+respectable life. I bought this estate, which chanced to be in
+the market, and I set myself to do a little good with my money,
+to make up for the way in which I had earned it. I married, too,
+and though my wife died young she left me my dear little Alice.
+Even when she was just a baby her wee hand seemed to lead me down
+the right path as nothing else had ever done. In a word, I turned
+over a new leaf and did my best to make up for the past. All was
+going well when McCarthy laid his grip upon me.
+
+"I had gone up to town about an investment, and I met him in
+Regent Street with hardly a coat to his back or a boot to his
+foot.
+
+"'Here we are, Jack,' says he, touching me on the arm; 'we'll be
+as good as a family to you. There's two of us, me and my son, and
+you can have the keeping of us. If you don't--it's a fine,
+law-abiding country is England, and there's always a policeman
+within hail.'
+
+"Well, down they came to the west country, there was no shaking
+them off, and there they have lived rent free on my best land
+ever since. There was no rest for me, no peace, no forgetfulness;
+turn where I would, there was his cunning, grinning face at my
+elbow. It grew worse as Alice grew up, for he soon saw I was more
+afraid of her knowing my past than of the police. Whatever he
+wanted he must have, and whatever it was I gave him without
+question, land, money, houses, until at last he asked a thing
+which I could not give. He asked for Alice.
+
+"His son, you see, had grown up, and so had my girl, and as I was
+known to be in weak health, it seemed a fine stroke to him that
+his lad should step into the whole property. But there I was
+firm. I would not have his cursed stock mixed with mine; not that
+I had any dislike to the lad, but his blood was in him, and that
+was enough. I stood firm. McCarthy threatened. I braved him to do
+his worst. We were to meet at the pool midway between our houses
+to talk it over.
+
+"When I went down there I found him talking with his son, so I
+smoked a cigar and waited behind a tree until he should be alone.
+But as I listened to his talk all that was black and bitter in
+me seemed to come uppermost. He was urging his son to marry my
+daughter with as little regard for what she might think as if she
+were a slut from off the streets. It drove me mad to think that I
+and all that I held most dear should be in the power of such a
+man as this. Could I not snap the bond? I was already a dying and
+a desperate man. Though clear of mind and fairly strong of limb,
+I knew that my own fate was sealed. But my memory and my girl!
+Both could be saved if I could but silence that foul tongue. I
+did it, Mr. Holmes. I would do it again. Deeply as I have sinned,
+I have led a life of martyrdom to atone for it. But that my girl
+should be entangled in the same meshes which held me was more
+than I could suffer. I struck him down with no more compunction
+than if he had been some foul and venomous beast. His cry brought
+back his son; but I had gained the cover of the wood, though I
+was forced to go back to fetch the cloak which I had dropped in
+my flight. That is the true story, gentlemen, of all that
+occurred."
+
+"Well, it is not for me to judge you," said Holmes as the old man
+signed the statement which had been drawn out. "I pray that we
+may never be exposed to such a temptation."
+
+"I pray not, sir. And what do you intend to do?"
+
+"In view of your health, nothing. You are yourself aware that you
+will soon have to answer for your deed at a higher court than the
+Assizes. I will keep your confession, and if McCarthy is
+condemned I shall be forced to use it. If not, it shall never be
+seen by mortal eye; and your secret, whether you be alive or
+dead, shall be safe with us."
+
+"Farewell, then," said the old man solemnly. "Your own deathbeds,
+when they come, will be the easier for the thought of the peace
+which you have given to mine." Tottering and shaking in all his
+giant frame, he stumbled slowly from the room.
+
+"God help us!" said Holmes after a long silence. "Why does fate
+play such tricks with poor, helpless worms? I never hear of such
+a case as this that I do not think of Baxter's words, and say,
+'There, but for the grace of God, goes Sherlock Holmes.'"
+
+James McCarthy was acquitted at the Assizes on the strength of a
+number of objections which had been drawn out by Holmes and
+submitted to the defending counsel. Old Turner lived for seven
+months after our interview, but he is now dead; and there is
+every prospect that the son and daughter may come to live happily
+together in ignorance of the black cloud which rests upon their
+past.
+
+
+
+ADVENTURE V. THE FIVE ORANGE PIPS
+
+When I glance over my notes and records of the Sherlock Holmes
+cases between the years '82 and '90, I am faced by so many which
+present strange and interesting features that it is no easy
+matter to know which to choose and which to leave. Some, however,
+have already gained publicity through the papers, and others have
+not offered a field for those peculiar qualities which my friend
+possessed in so high a degree, and which it is the object of
+these papers to illustrate. Some, too, have baffled his
+analytical skill, and would be, as narratives, beginnings without
+an ending, while others have been but partially cleared up, and
+have their explanations founded rather upon conjecture and
+surmise than on that absolute logical proof which was so dear to
+him. There is, however, one of these last which was so remarkable
+in its details and so startling in its results that I am tempted
+to give some account of it in spite of the fact that there are
+points in connection with it which never have been, and probably
+never will be, entirely cleared up.
+
+The year '87 furnished us with a long series of cases of greater
+or less interest, of which I retain the records. Among my
+headings under this one twelve months I find an account of the
+adventure of the Paradol Chamber, of the Amateur Mendicant
+Society, who held a luxurious club in the lower vault of a
+furniture warehouse, of the facts connected with the loss of the
+British barque "Sophy Anderson", of the singular adventures of the
+Grice Patersons in the island of Uffa, and finally of the
+Camberwell poisoning case. In the latter, as may be remembered,
+Sherlock Holmes was able, by winding up the dead man's watch, to
+prove that it had been wound up two hours before, and that
+therefore the deceased had gone to bed within that time--a
+deduction which was of the greatest importance in clearing up the
+case. All these I may sketch out at some future date, but none of
+them present such singular features as the strange train of
+circumstances which I have now taken up my pen to describe.
+
+It was in the latter days of September, and the equinoctial gales
+had set in with exceptional violence. All day the wind had
+screamed and the rain had beaten against the windows, so that
+even here in the heart of great, hand-made London we were forced
+to raise our minds for the instant from the routine of life and
+to recognise the presence of those great elemental forces which
+shriek at mankind through the bars of his civilisation, like
+untamed beasts in a cage. As evening drew in, the storm grew
+higher and louder, and the wind cried and sobbed like a child in
+the chimney. Sherlock Holmes sat moodily at one side of the
+fireplace cross-indexing his records of crime, while I at the
+other was deep in one of Clark Russell's fine sea-stories until
+the howl of the gale from without seemed to blend with the text,
+and the splash of the rain to lengthen out into the long swash of
+the sea waves. My wife was on a visit to her mother's, and for a
+few days I was a dweller once more in my old quarters at Baker
+Street.
+
+"Why," said I, glancing up at my companion, "that was surely the
+bell. Who could come to-night? Some friend of yours, perhaps?"
+
+"Except yourself I have none," he answered. "I do not encourage
+visitors."
+
+"A client, then?"
+
+"If so, it is a serious case. Nothing less would bring a man out
+on such a day and at such an hour. But I take it that it is more
+likely to be some crony of the landlady's."
+
+Sherlock Holmes was wrong in his conjecture, however, for there
+came a step in the passage and a tapping at the door. He
+stretched out his long arm to turn the lamp away from himself and
+towards the vacant chair upon which a newcomer must sit.
+
+"Come in!" said he.
+
+The man who entered was young, some two-and-twenty at the
+outside, well-groomed and trimly clad, with something of
+refinement and delicacy in his bearing. The streaming umbrella
+which he held in his hand, and his long shining waterproof told
+of the fierce weather through which he had come. He looked about
+him anxiously in the glare of the lamp, and I could see that his
+face was pale and his eyes heavy, like those of a man who is
+weighed down with some great anxiety.
+
+"I owe you an apology," he said, raising his golden pince-nez to
+his eyes. "I trust that I am not intruding. I fear that I have
+brought some traces of the storm and rain into your snug
+chamber."
+
+"Give me your coat and umbrella," said Holmes. "They may rest
+here on the hook and will be dry presently. You have come up from
+the south-west, I see."
+
+"Yes, from Horsham."
+
+"That clay and chalk mixture which I see upon your toe caps is
+quite distinctive."
+
+"I have come for advice."
+
+"That is easily got."
+
+"And help."
+
+"That is not always so easy."
+
+"I have heard of you, Mr. Holmes. I heard from Major Prendergast
+how you saved him in the Tankerville Club scandal."
+
+"Ah, of course. He was wrongfully accused of cheating at cards."
+
+"He said that you could solve anything."
+
+"He said too much."
+
+"That you are never beaten."
+
+"I have been beaten four times--three times by men, and once by a
+woman."
+
+"But what is that compared with the number of your successes?"
+
+"It is true that I have been generally successful."
+
+"Then you may be so with me."
+
+"I beg that you will draw your chair up to the fire and favour me
+with some details as to your case."
+
+"It is no ordinary one."
+
+"None of those which come to me are. I am the last court of
+appeal."
+
+"And yet I question, sir, whether, in all your experience, you
+have ever listened to a more mysterious and inexplicable chain of
+events than those which have happened in my own family."
+
+"You fill me with interest," said Holmes. "Pray give us the
+essential facts from the commencement, and I can afterwards
+question you as to those details which seem to me to be most
+important."
+
+The young man pulled his chair up and pushed his wet feet out
+towards the blaze.
+
+"My name," said he, "is John Openshaw, but my own affairs have,
+as far as I can understand, little to do with this awful
+business. It is a hereditary matter; so in order to give you an
+idea of the facts, I must go back to the commencement of the
+affair.
+
+"You must know that my grandfather had two sons--my uncle Elias
+and my father Joseph. My father had a small factory at Coventry,
+which he enlarged at the time of the invention of bicycling. He
+was a patentee of the Openshaw unbreakable tire, and his business
+met with such success that he was able to sell it and to retire
+upon a handsome competence.
+
+"My uncle Elias emigrated to America when he was a young man and
+became a planter in Florida, where he was reported to have done
+very well. At the time of the war he fought in Jackson's army,
+and afterwards under Hood, where he rose to be a colonel. When
+Lee laid down his arms my uncle returned to his plantation, where
+he remained for three or four years. About 1869 or 1870 he came
+back to Europe and took a small estate in Sussex, near Horsham.
+He had made a very considerable fortune in the States, and his
+reason for leaving them was his aversion to the negroes, and his
+dislike of the Republican policy in extending the franchise to
+them. He was a singular man, fierce and quick-tempered, very
+foul-mouthed when he was angry, and of a most retiring
+disposition. During all the years that he lived at Horsham, I
+doubt if ever he set foot in the town. He had a garden and two or
+three fields round his house, and there he would take his
+exercise, though very often for weeks on end he would never leave
+his room. He drank a great deal of brandy and smoked very
+heavily, but he would see no society and did not want any
+friends, not even his own brother.
+
+"He didn't mind me; in fact, he took a fancy to me, for at the
+time when he saw me first I was a youngster of twelve or so. This
+would be in the year 1878, after he had been eight or nine years
+in England. He begged my father to let me live with him and he
+was very kind to me in his way. When he was sober he used to be
+fond of playing backgammon and draughts with me, and he would
+make me his representative both with the servants and with the
+tradespeople, so that by the time that I was sixteen I was quite
+master of the house. I kept all the keys and could go where I
+liked and do what I liked, so long as I did not disturb him in
+his privacy. There was one singular exception, however, for he
+had a single room, a lumber-room up among the attics, which was
+invariably locked, and which he would never permit either me or
+anyone else to enter. With a boy's curiosity I have peeped
+through the keyhole, but I was never able to see more than such a
+collection of old trunks and bundles as would be expected in such
+a room.
+
+"One day--it was in March, 1883--a letter with a foreign stamp
+lay upon the table in front of the colonel's plate. It was not a
+common thing for him to receive letters, for his bills were all
+paid in ready money, and he had no friends of any sort. 'From
+India!' said he as he took it up, 'Pondicherry postmark! What can
+this be?' Opening it hurriedly, out there jumped five little
+dried orange pips, which pattered down upon his plate. I began to
+laugh at this, but the laugh was struck from my lips at the sight
+of his face. His lip had fallen, his eyes were protruding, his
+skin the colour of putty, and he glared at the envelope which he
+still held in his trembling hand, 'K. K. K.!' he shrieked, and
+then, 'My God, my God, my sins have overtaken me!'
+
+"'What is it, uncle?' I cried.
+
+"'Death,' said he, and rising from the table he retired to his
+room, leaving me palpitating with horror. I took up the envelope
+and saw scrawled in red ink upon the inner flap, just above the
+gum, the letter K three times repeated. There was nothing else
+save the five dried pips. What could be the reason of his
+overpowering terror? I left the breakfast-table, and as I
+ascended the stair I met him coming down with an old rusty key,
+which must have belonged to the attic, in one hand, and a small
+brass box, like a cashbox, in the other.
+
+"'They may do what they like, but I'll checkmate them still,'
+said he with an oath. 'Tell Mary that I shall want a fire in my
+room to-day, and send down to Fordham, the Horsham lawyer.'
+
+"I did as he ordered, and when the lawyer arrived I was asked to
+step up to the room. The fire was burning brightly, and in the
+grate there was a mass of black, fluffy ashes, as of burned
+paper, while the brass box stood open and empty beside it. As I
+glanced at the box I noticed, with a start, that upon the lid was
+printed the treble K which I had read in the morning upon the
+envelope.
+
+"'I wish you, John,' said my uncle, 'to witness my will. I leave
+my estate, with all its advantages and all its disadvantages, to
+my brother, your father, whence it will, no doubt, descend to
+you. If you can enjoy it in peace, well and good! If you find you
+cannot, take my advice, my boy, and leave it to your deadliest
+enemy. I am sorry to give you such a two-edged thing, but I can't
+say what turn things are going to take. Kindly sign the paper
+where Mr. Fordham shows you.'
+
+"I signed the paper as directed, and the lawyer took it away with
+him. The singular incident made, as you may think, the deepest
+impression upon me, and I pondered over it and turned it every
+way in my mind without being able to make anything of it. Yet I
+could not shake off the vague feeling of dread which it left
+behind, though the sensation grew less keen as the weeks passed
+and nothing happened to disturb the usual routine of our lives. I
+could see a change in my uncle, however. He drank more than ever,
+and he was less inclined for any sort of society. Most of his
+time he would spend in his room, with the door locked upon the
+inside, but sometimes he would emerge in a sort of drunken frenzy
+and would burst out of the house and tear about the garden with a
+revolver in his hand, screaming out that he was afraid of no man,
+and that he was not to be cooped up, like a sheep in a pen, by
+man or devil. When these hot fits were over, however, he would
+rush tumultuously in at the door and lock and bar it behind him,
+like a man who can brazen it out no longer against the terror
+which lies at the roots of his soul. At such times I have seen
+his face, even on a cold day, glisten with moisture, as though it
+were new raised from a basin.
+
+"Well, to come to an end of the matter, Mr. Holmes, and not to
+abuse your patience, there came a night when he made one of those
+drunken sallies from which he never came back. We found him, when
+we went to search for him, face downward in a little
+green-scummed pool, which lay at the foot of the garden. There
+was no sign of any violence, and the water was but two feet deep,
+so that the jury, having regard to his known eccentricity,
+brought in a verdict of 'suicide.' But I, who knew how he winced
+from the very thought of death, had much ado to persuade myself
+that he had gone out of his way to meet it. The matter passed,
+however, and my father entered into possession of the estate, and
+of some 14,000 pounds, which lay to his credit at the bank."
+
+"One moment," Holmes interposed, "your statement is, I foresee,
+one of the most remarkable to which I have ever listened. Let me
+have the date of the reception by your uncle of the letter, and
+the date of his supposed suicide."
+
+"The letter arrived on March 10, 1883. His death was seven weeks
+later, upon the night of May 2nd."
+
+"Thank you. Pray proceed."
+
+"When my father took over the Horsham property, he, at my
+request, made a careful examination of the attic, which had been
+always locked up. We found the brass box there, although its
+contents had been destroyed. On the inside of the cover was a
+paper label, with the initials of K. K. K. repeated upon it, and
+'Letters, memoranda, receipts, and a register' written beneath.
+These, we presume, indicated the nature of the papers which had
+been destroyed by Colonel Openshaw. For the rest, there was
+nothing of much importance in the attic save a great many
+scattered papers and note-books bearing upon my uncle's life in
+America. Some of them were of the war time and showed that he had
+done his duty well and had borne the repute of a brave soldier.
+Others were of a date during the reconstruction of the Southern
+states, and were mostly concerned with politics, for he had
+evidently taken a strong part in opposing the carpet-bag
+politicians who had been sent down from the North.
+
+"Well, it was the beginning of '84 when my father came to live at
+Horsham, and all went as well as possible with us until the
+January of '85. On the fourth day after the new year I heard my
+father give a sharp cry of surprise as we sat together at the
+breakfast-table. There he was, sitting with a newly opened
+envelope in one hand and five dried orange pips in the
+outstretched palm of the other one. He had always laughed at what
+he called my cock-and-bull story about the colonel, but he looked
+very scared and puzzled now that the same thing had come upon
+himself.
+
+"'Why, what on earth does this mean, John?' he stammered.
+
+"My heart had turned to lead. 'It is K. K. K.,' said I.
+
+"He looked inside the envelope. 'So it is,' he cried. 'Here are
+the very letters. But what is this written above them?'
+
+"'Put the papers on the sundial,' I read, peeping over his
+shoulder.
+
+"'What papers? What sundial?' he asked.
+
+"'The sundial in the garden. There is no other,' said I; 'but the
+papers must be those that are destroyed.'
+
+"'Pooh!' said he, gripping hard at his courage. 'We are in a
+civilised land here, and we can't have tomfoolery of this kind.
+Where does the thing come from?'
+
+"'From Dundee,' I answered, glancing at the postmark.
+
+"'Some preposterous practical joke,' said he. 'What have I to do
+with sundials and papers? I shall take no notice of such
+nonsense.'
+
+"'I should certainly speak to the police,' I said.
+
+"'And be laughed at for my pains. Nothing of the sort.'
+
+"'Then let me do so?'
+
+"'No, I forbid you. I won't have a fuss made about such
+nonsense.'
+
+"It was in vain to argue with him, for he was a very obstinate
+man. I went about, however, with a heart which was full of
+forebodings.
+
+"On the third day after the coming of the letter my father went
+from home to visit an old friend of his, Major Freebody, who is
+in command of one of the forts upon Portsdown Hill. I was glad
+that he should go, for it seemed to me that he was farther from
+danger when he was away from home. In that, however, I was in
+error. Upon the second day of his absence I received a telegram
+from the major, imploring me to come at once. My father had
+fallen over one of the deep chalk-pits which abound in the
+neighbourhood, and was lying senseless, with a shattered skull. I
+hurried to him, but he passed away without having ever recovered
+his consciousness. He had, as it appears, been returning from
+Fareham in the twilight, and as the country was unknown to him,
+and the chalk-pit unfenced, the jury had no hesitation in
+bringing in a verdict of 'death from accidental causes.'
+Carefully as I examined every fact connected with his death, I
+was unable to find anything which could suggest the idea of
+murder. There were no signs of violence, no footmarks, no
+robbery, no record of strangers having been seen upon the roads.
+And yet I need not tell you that my mind was far from at ease,
+and that I was well-nigh certain that some foul plot had been
+woven round him.
+
+"In this sinister way I came into my inheritance. You will ask me
+why I did not dispose of it? I answer, because I was well
+convinced that our troubles were in some way dependent upon an
+incident in my uncle's life, and that the danger would be as
+pressing in one house as in another.
+
+"It was in January, '85, that my poor father met his end, and two
+years and eight months have elapsed since then. During that time
+I have lived happily at Horsham, and I had begun to hope that
+this curse had passed away from the family, and that it had ended
+with the last generation. I had begun to take comfort too soon,
+however; yesterday morning the blow fell in the very shape in
+which it had come upon my father."
+
+The young man took from his waistcoat a crumpled envelope, and
+turning to the table he shook out upon it five little dried
+orange pips.
+
+"This is the envelope," he continued. "The postmark is
+London--eastern division. Within are the very words which were
+upon my father's last message: 'K. K. K.'; and then 'Put the
+papers on the sundial.'"
+
+"What have you done?" asked Holmes.
+
+"Nothing."
+
+"Nothing?"
+
+"To tell the truth"--he sank his face into his thin, white
+hands--"I have felt helpless. I have felt like one of those poor
+rabbits when the snake is writhing towards it. I seem to be in
+the grasp of some resistless, inexorable evil, which no foresight
+and no precautions can guard against."
+
+"Tut! tut!" cried Sherlock Holmes. "You must act, man, or you are
+lost. Nothing but energy can save you. This is no time for
+despair."
+
+"I have seen the police."
+
+"Ah!"
+
+"But they listened to my story with a smile. I am convinced that
+the inspector has formed the opinion that the letters are all
+practical jokes, and that the deaths of my relations were really
+accidents, as the jury stated, and were not to be connected with
+the warnings."
+
+Holmes shook his clenched hands in the air. "Incredible
+imbecility!" he cried.
+
+"They have, however, allowed me a policeman, who may remain in
+the house with me."
+
+"Has he come with you to-night?"
+
+"No. His orders were to stay in the house."
+
+Again Holmes raved in the air.
+
+"Why did you come to me," he cried, "and, above all, why did you
+not come at once?"
+
+"I did not know. It was only to-day that I spoke to Major
+Prendergast about my troubles and was advised by him to come to
+you."
+
+"It is really two days since you had the letter. We should have
+acted before this. You have no further evidence, I suppose, than
+that which you have placed before us--no suggestive detail which
+might help us?"
+
+"There is one thing," said John Openshaw. He rummaged in his coat
+pocket, and, drawing out a piece of discoloured, blue-tinted
+paper, he laid it out upon the table. "I have some remembrance,"
+said he, "that on the day when my uncle burned the papers I
+observed that the small, unburned margins which lay amid the
+ashes were of this particular colour. I found this single sheet
+upon the floor of his room, and I am inclined to think that it
+may be one of the papers which has, perhaps, fluttered out from
+among the others, and in that way has escaped destruction. Beyond
+the mention of pips, I do not see that it helps us much. I think
+myself that it is a page from some private diary. The writing is
+undoubtedly my uncle's."
+
+Holmes moved the lamp, and we both bent over the sheet of paper,
+which showed by its ragged edge that it had indeed been torn from
+a book. It was headed, "March, 1869," and beneath were the
+following enigmatical notices:
+
+"4th. Hudson came. Same old platform.
+
+"7th. Set the pips on McCauley, Paramore, and
+      John Swain, of St. Augustine.
+
+"9th. McCauley cleared.
+
+"10th. John Swain cleared.
+
+"12th. Visited Paramore. All well."
+
+"Thank you!" said Holmes, folding up the paper and returning it
+to our visitor. "And now you must on no account lose another
+instant. We cannot spare time even to discuss what you have told
+me. You must get home instantly and act."
+
+"What shall I do?"
+
+"There is but one thing to do. It must be done at once. You must
+put this piece of paper which you have shown us into the brass
+box which you have described. You must also put in a note to say
+that all the other papers were burned by your uncle, and that
+this is the only one which remains. You must assert that in such
+words as will carry conviction with them. Having done this, you
+must at once put the box out upon the sundial, as directed. Do
+you understand?"
+
+"Entirely."
+
+"Do not think of revenge, or anything of the sort, at present. I
+think that we may gain that by means of the law; but we have our
+web to weave, while theirs is already woven. The first
+consideration is to remove the pressing danger which threatens
+you. The second is to clear up the mystery and to punish the
+guilty parties."
+
+"I thank you," said the young man, rising and pulling on his
+overcoat. "You have given me fresh life and hope. I shall
+certainly do as you advise."
+
+"Do not lose an instant. And, above all, take care of yourself in
+the meanwhile, for I do not think that there can be a doubt that
+you are threatened by a very real and imminent danger. How do you
+go back?"
+
+"By train from Waterloo."
+
+"It is not yet nine. The streets will be crowded, so I trust that
+you may be in safety. And yet you cannot guard yourself too
+closely."
+
+"I am armed."
+
+"That is well. To-morrow I shall set to work upon your case."
+
+"I shall see you at Horsham, then?"
+
+"No, your secret lies in London. It is there that I shall seek
+it."
+
+"Then I shall call upon you in a day, or in two days, with news
+as to the box and the papers. I shall take your advice in every
+particular." He shook hands with us and took his leave. Outside
+the wind still screamed and the rain splashed and pattered
+against the windows. This strange, wild story seemed to have come
+to us from amid the mad elements--blown in upon us like a sheet
+of sea-weed in a gale--and now to have been reabsorbed by them
+once more.
+
+Sherlock Holmes sat for some time in silence, with his head sunk
+forward and his eyes bent upon the red glow of the fire. Then he
+lit his pipe, and leaning back in his chair he watched the blue
+smoke-rings as they chased each other up to the ceiling.
+
+"I think, Watson," he remarked at last, "that of all our cases we
+have had none more fantastic than this."
+
+"Save, perhaps, the Sign of Four."
+
+"Well, yes. Save, perhaps, that. And yet this John Openshaw seems
+to me to be walking amid even greater perils than did the
+Sholtos."
+
+"But have you," I asked, "formed any definite conception as to
+what these perils are?"
+
+"There can be no question as to their nature," he answered.
+
+"Then what are they? Who is this K. K. K., and why does he pursue
+this unhappy family?"
+
+Sherlock Holmes closed his eyes and placed his elbows upon the
+arms of his chair, with his finger-tips together. "The ideal
+reasoner," he remarked, "would, when he had once been shown a
+single fact in all its bearings, deduce from it not only all the
+chain of events which led up to it but also all the results which
+would follow from it. As Cuvier could correctly describe a whole
+animal by the contemplation of a single bone, so the observer who
+has thoroughly understood one link in a series of incidents
+should be able to accurately state all the other ones, both
+before and after. We have not yet grasped the results which the
+reason alone can attain to. Problems may be solved in the study
+which have baffled all those who have sought a solution by the
+aid of their senses. To carry the art, however, to its highest
+pitch, it is necessary that the reasoner should be able to
+utilise all the facts which have come to his knowledge; and this
+in itself implies, as you will readily see, a possession of all
+knowledge, which, even in these days of free education and
+encyclopaedias, is a somewhat rare accomplishment. It is not so
+impossible, however, that a man should possess all knowledge
+which is likely to be useful to him in his work, and this I have
+endeavoured in my case to do. If I remember rightly, you on one
+occasion, in the early days of our friendship, defined my limits
+in a very precise fashion."
+
+"Yes," I answered, laughing. "It was a singular document.
+Philosophy, astronomy, and politics were marked at zero, I
+remember. Botany variable, geology profound as regards the
+mud-stains from any region within fifty miles of town, chemistry
+eccentric, anatomy unsystematic, sensational literature and crime
+records unique, violin-player, boxer, swordsman, lawyer, and
+self-poisoner by cocaine and tobacco. Those, I think, were the
+main points of my analysis."
+
+Holmes grinned at the last item. "Well," he said, "I say now, as
+I said then, that a man should keep his little brain-attic
+stocked with all the furniture that he is likely to use, and the
+rest he can put away in the lumber-room of his library, where he
+can get it if he wants it. Now, for such a case as the one which
+has been submitted to us to-night, we need certainly to muster
+all our resources. Kindly hand me down the letter K of the
+'American Encyclopaedia' which stands upon the shelf beside you.
+Thank you. Now let us consider the situation and see what may be
+deduced from it. In the first place, we may start with a strong
+presumption that Colonel Openshaw had some very strong reason for
+leaving America. Men at his time of life do not change all their
+habits and exchange willingly the charming climate of Florida for
+the lonely life of an English provincial town. His extreme love
+of solitude in England suggests the idea that he was in fear of
+someone or something, so we may assume as a working hypothesis
+that it was fear of someone or something which drove him from
+America. As to what it was he feared, we can only deduce that by
+considering the formidable letters which were received by himself
+and his successors. Did you remark the postmarks of those
+letters?"
+
+"The first was from Pondicherry, the second from Dundee, and the
+third from London."
+
+"From East London. What do you deduce from that?"
+
+"They are all seaports. That the writer was on board of a ship."
+
+"Excellent. We have already a clue. There can be no doubt that
+the probability--the strong probability--is that the writer was
+on board of a ship. And now let us consider another point. In the
+case of Pondicherry, seven weeks elapsed between the threat and
+its fulfilment, in Dundee it was only some three or four days.
+Does that suggest anything?"
+
+"A greater distance to travel."
+
+"But the letter had also a greater distance to come."
+
+"Then I do not see the point."
+
+"There is at least a presumption that the vessel in which the man
+or men are is a sailing-ship. It looks as if they always send
+their singular warning or token before them when starting upon
+their mission. You see how quickly the deed followed the sign
+when it came from Dundee. If they had come from Pondicherry in a
+steamer they would have arrived almost as soon as their letter.
+But, as a matter of fact, seven weeks elapsed. I think that those
+seven weeks represented the difference between the mail-boat which
+brought the letter and the sailing vessel which brought the
+writer."
+
+"It is possible."
+
+"More than that. It is probable. And now you see the deadly
+urgency of this new case, and why I urged young Openshaw to
+caution. The blow has always fallen at the end of the time which
+it would take the senders to travel the distance. But this one
+comes from London, and therefore we cannot count upon delay."
+
+"Good God!" I cried. "What can it mean, this relentless
+persecution?"
+
+"The papers which Openshaw carried are obviously of vital
+importance to the person or persons in the sailing-ship. I think
+that it is quite clear that there must be more than one of them.
+A single man could not have carried out two deaths in such a way
+as to deceive a coroner's jury. There must have been several in
+it, and they must have been men of resource and determination.
+Their papers they mean to have, be the holder of them who it may.
+In this way you see K. K. K. ceases to be the initials of an
+individual and becomes the badge of a society."
+
+"But of what society?"
+
+"Have you never--" said Sherlock Holmes, bending forward and
+sinking his voice--"have you never heard of the Ku Klux Klan?"
+
+"I never have."
+
+Holmes turned over the leaves of the book upon his knee. "Here it
+is," said he presently:
+
+"'Ku Klux Klan. A name derived from the fanciful resemblance to
+the sound produced by cocking a rifle. This terrible secret
+society was formed by some ex-Confederate soldiers in the
+Southern states after the Civil War, and it rapidly formed local
+branches in different parts of the country, notably in Tennessee,
+Louisiana, the Carolinas, Georgia, and Florida. Its power was
+used for political purposes, principally for the terrorising of
+the negro voters and the murdering and driving from the country
+of those who were opposed to its views. Its outrages were usually
+preceded by a warning sent to the marked man in some fantastic
+but generally recognised shape--a sprig of oak-leaves in some
+parts, melon seeds or orange pips in others. On receiving this
+the victim might either openly abjure his former ways, or might
+fly from the country. If he braved the matter out, death would
+unfailingly come upon him, and usually in some strange and
+unforeseen manner. So perfect was the organisation of the
+society, and so systematic its methods, that there is hardly a
+case upon record where any man succeeded in braving it with
+impunity, or in which any of its outrages were traced home to the
+perpetrators. For some years the organisation flourished in spite
+of the efforts of the United States government and of the better
+classes of the community in the South. Eventually, in the year
+1869, the movement rather suddenly collapsed, although there have
+been sporadic outbreaks of the same sort since that date.'
+
+"You will observe," said Holmes, laying down the volume, "that
+the sudden breaking up of the society was coincident with the
+disappearance of Openshaw from America with their papers. It may
+well have been cause and effect. It is no wonder that he and his
+family have some of the more implacable spirits upon their track.
+You can understand that this register and diary may implicate
+some of the first men in the South, and that there may be many
+who will not sleep easy at night until it is recovered."
+
+"Then the page we have seen--"
+
+"Is such as we might expect. It ran, if I remember right, 'sent
+the pips to A, B, and C'--that is, sent the society's warning to
+them. Then there are successive entries that A and B cleared, or
+left the country, and finally that C was visited, with, I fear, a
+sinister result for C. Well, I think, Doctor, that we may let
+some light into this dark place, and I believe that the only
+chance young Openshaw has in the meantime is to do what I have
+told him. There is nothing more to be said or to be done
+to-night, so hand me over my violin and let us try to forget for
+half an hour the miserable weather and the still more miserable
+ways of our fellow-men."
+
+
+It had cleared in the morning, and the sun was shining with a
+subdued brightness through the dim veil which hangs over the
+great city. Sherlock Holmes was already at breakfast when I came
+down.
+
+"You will excuse me for not waiting for you," said he; "I have, I
+foresee, a very busy day before me in looking into this case of
+young Openshaw's."
+
+"What steps will you take?" I asked.
+
+"It will very much depend upon the results of my first inquiries.
+I may have to go down to Horsham, after all."
+
+"You will not go there first?"
+
+"No, I shall commence with the City. Just ring the bell and the
+maid will bring up your coffee."
+
+As I waited, I lifted the unopened newspaper from the table and
+glanced my eye over it. It rested upon a heading which sent a
+chill to my heart.
+
+"Holmes," I cried, "you are too late."
+
+"Ah!" said he, laying down his cup, "I feared as much. How was it
+done?" He spoke calmly, but I could see that he was deeply moved.
+
+"My eye caught the name of Openshaw, and the heading 'Tragedy
+Near Waterloo Bridge.' Here is the account:
+
+"Between nine and ten last night Police-Constable Cook, of the H
+Division, on duty near Waterloo Bridge, heard a cry for help and
+a splash in the water. The night, however, was extremely dark and
+stormy, so that, in spite of the help of several passers-by, it
+was quite impossible to effect a rescue. The alarm, however, was
+given, and, by the aid of the water-police, the body was
+eventually recovered. It proved to be that of a young gentleman
+whose name, as it appears from an envelope which was found in his
+pocket, was John Openshaw, and whose residence is near Horsham.
+It is conjectured that he may have been hurrying down to catch
+the last train from Waterloo Station, and that in his haste and
+the extreme darkness he missed his path and walked over the edge
+of one of the small landing-places for river steamboats. The body
+exhibited no traces of violence, and there can be no doubt that
+the deceased had been the victim of an unfortunate accident,
+which should have the effect of calling the attention of the
+authorities to the condition of the riverside landing-stages."
+
+We sat in silence for some minutes, Holmes more depressed and
+shaken than I had ever seen him.
+
+"That hurts my pride, Watson," he said at last. "It is a petty
+feeling, no doubt, but it hurts my pride. It becomes a personal
+matter with me now, and, if God sends me health, I shall set my
+hand upon this gang. That he should come to me for help, and that
+I should send him away to his death--!" He sprang from his chair
+and paced about the room in uncontrollable agitation, with a
+flush upon his sallow cheeks and a nervous clasping and
+unclasping of his long thin hands.
+
+"They must be cunning devils," he exclaimed at last. "How could
+they have decoyed him down there? The Embankment is not on the
+direct line to the station. The bridge, no doubt, was too
+crowded, even on such a night, for their purpose. Well, Watson,
+we shall see who will win in the long run. I am going out now!"
+
+"To the police?"
+
+"No; I shall be my own police. When I have spun the web they may
+take the flies, but not before."
+
+All day I was engaged in my professional work, and it was late in
+the evening before I returned to Baker Street. Sherlock Holmes
+had not come back yet. It was nearly ten o'clock before he
+entered, looking pale and worn. He walked up to the sideboard,
+and tearing a piece from the loaf he devoured it voraciously,
+washing it down with a long draught of water.
+
+"You are hungry," I remarked.
+
+"Starving. It had escaped my memory. I have had nothing since
+breakfast."
+
+"Nothing?"
+
+"Not a bite. I had no time to think of it."
+
+"And how have you succeeded?"
+
+"Well."
+
+"You have a clue?"
+
+"I have them in the hollow of my hand. Young Openshaw shall not
+long remain unavenged. Why, Watson, let us put their own devilish
+trade-mark upon them. It is well thought of!"
+
+"What do you mean?"
+
+He took an orange from the cupboard, and tearing it to pieces he
+squeezed out the pips upon the table. Of these he took five and
+thrust them into an envelope. On the inside of the flap he wrote
+"S. H. for J. O." Then he sealed it and addressed it to "Captain
+James Calhoun, Barque 'Lone Star,' Savannah, Georgia."
+
+"That will await him when he enters port," said he, chuckling.
+"It may give him a sleepless night. He will find it as sure a
+precursor of his fate as Openshaw did before him."
+
+"And who is this Captain Calhoun?"
+
+"The leader of the gang. I shall have the others, but he first."
+
+"How did you trace it, then?"
+
+He took a large sheet of paper from his pocket, all covered with
+dates and names.
+
+"I have spent the whole day," said he, "over Lloyd's registers
+and files of the old papers, following the future career of every
+vessel which touched at Pondicherry in January and February in
+'83. There were thirty-six ships of fair tonnage which were
+reported there during those months. Of these, one, the 'Lone Star,'
+instantly attracted my attention, since, although it was reported
+as having cleared from London, the name is that which is given to
+one of the states of the Union."
+
+"Texas, I think."
+
+"I was not and am not sure which; but I knew that the ship must
+have an American origin."
+
+"What then?"
+
+"I searched the Dundee records, and when I found that the barque
+'Lone Star' was there in January, '85, my suspicion became a
+certainty. I then inquired as to the vessels which lay at present
+in the port of London."
+
+"Yes?"
+
+"The 'Lone Star' had arrived here last week. I went down to the
+Albert Dock and found that she had been taken down the river by
+the early tide this morning, homeward bound to Savannah. I wired
+to Gravesend and learned that she had passed some time ago, and
+as the wind is easterly I have no doubt that she is now past the
+Goodwins and not very far from the Isle of Wight."
+
+"What will you do, then?"
+
+"Oh, I have my hand upon him. He and the two mates, are as I
+learn, the only native-born Americans in the ship. The others are
+Finns and Germans. I know, also, that they were all three away
+from the ship last night. I had it from the stevedore who has
+been loading their cargo. By the time that their sailing-ship
+reaches Savannah the mail-boat will have carried this letter, and
+the cable will have informed the police of Savannah that these
+three gentlemen are badly wanted here upon a charge of murder."
+
+There is ever a flaw, however, in the best laid of human plans,
+and the murderers of John Openshaw were never to receive the
+orange pips which would show them that another, as cunning and as
+resolute as themselves, was upon their track. Very long and very
+severe were the equinoctial gales that year. We waited long for
+news of the "Lone Star" of Savannah, but none ever reached us. We
+did at last hear that somewhere far out in the Atlantic a
+shattered stern-post of a boat was seen swinging in the trough
+of a wave, with the letters "L. S." carved upon it, and that is
+all which we shall ever know of the fate of the "Lone Star."
+
+
+
+ADVENTURE VI. THE MAN WITH THE TWISTED LIP
+
+Isa Whitney, brother of the late Elias Whitney, D.D., Principal
+of the Theological College of St. George's, was much addicted to
+opium. The habit grew upon him, as I understand, from some
+foolish freak when he was at college; for having read De
+Quincey's description of his dreams and sensations, he had
+drenched his tobacco with laudanum in an attempt to produce the
+same effects. He found, as so many more have done, that the
+practice is easier to attain than to get rid of, and for many
+years he continued to be a slave to the drug, an object of
+mingled horror and pity to his friends and relatives. I can see
+him now, with yellow, pasty face, drooping lids, and pin-point
+pupils, all huddled in a chair, the wreck and ruin of a noble
+man.
+
+One night--it was in June, '89--there came a ring to my bell,
+about the hour when a man gives his first yawn and glances at the
+clock. I sat up in my chair, and my wife laid her needle-work
+down in her lap and made a little face of disappointment.
+
+"A patient!" said she. "You'll have to go out."
+
+I groaned, for I was newly come back from a weary day.
+
+We heard the door open, a few hurried words, and then quick steps
+upon the linoleum. Our own door flew open, and a lady, clad in
+some dark-coloured stuff, with a black veil, entered the room.
+
+"You will excuse my calling so late," she began, and then,
+suddenly losing her self-control, she ran forward, threw her arms
+about my wife's neck, and sobbed upon her shoulder. "Oh, I'm in
+such trouble!" she cried; "I do so want a little help."
+
+"Why," said my wife, pulling up her veil, "it is Kate Whitney.
+How you startled me, Kate! I had not an idea who you were when
+you came in."
+
+"I didn't know what to do, so I came straight to you." That was
+always the way. Folk who were in grief came to my wife like birds
+to a light-house.
+
+"It was very sweet of you to come. Now, you must have some wine
+and water, and sit here comfortably and tell us all about it. Or
+should you rather that I sent James off to bed?"
+
+"Oh, no, no! I want the doctor's advice and help, too. It's about
+Isa. He has not been home for two days. I am so frightened about
+him!"
+
+It was not the first time that she had spoken to us of her
+husband's trouble, to me as a doctor, to my wife as an old friend
+and school companion. We soothed and comforted her by such words
+as we could find. Did she know where her husband was? Was it
+possible that we could bring him back to her?
+
+It seems that it was. She had the surest information that of late
+he had, when the fit was on him, made use of an opium den in the
+farthest east of the City. Hitherto his orgies had always been
+confined to one day, and he had come back, twitching and
+shattered, in the evening. But now the spell had been upon him
+eight-and-forty hours, and he lay there, doubtless among the
+dregs of the docks, breathing in the poison or sleeping off the
+effects. There he was to be found, she was sure of it, at the Bar
+of Gold, in Upper Swandam Lane. But what was she to do? How could
+she, a young and timid woman, make her way into such a place and
+pluck her husband out from among the ruffians who surrounded him?
+
+There was the case, and of course there was but one way out of
+it. Might I not escort her to this place? And then, as a second
+thought, why should she come at all? I was Isa Whitney's medical
+adviser, and as such I had influence over him. I could manage it
+better if I were alone. I promised her on my word that I would
+send him home in a cab within two hours if he were indeed at the
+address which she had given me. And so in ten minutes I had left
+my armchair and cheery sitting-room behind me, and was speeding
+eastward in a hansom on a strange errand, as it seemed to me at
+the time, though the future only could show how strange it was to
+be.
+
+But there was no great difficulty in the first stage of my
+adventure. Upper Swandam Lane is a vile alley lurking behind the
+high wharves which line the north side of the river to the east
+of London Bridge. Between a slop-shop and a gin-shop, approached
+by a steep flight of steps leading down to a black gap like the
+mouth of a cave, I found the den of which I was in search.
+Ordering my cab to wait, I passed down the steps, worn hollow in
+the centre by the ceaseless tread of drunken feet; and by the
+light of a flickering oil-lamp above the door I found the latch
+and made my way into a long, low room, thick and heavy with the
+brown opium smoke, and terraced with wooden berths, like the
+forecastle of an emigrant ship.
+
+Through the gloom one could dimly catch a glimpse of bodies lying
+in strange fantastic poses, bowed shoulders, bent knees, heads
+thrown back, and chins pointing upward, with here and there a
+dark, lack-lustre eye turned upon the newcomer. Out of the black
+shadows there glimmered little red circles of light, now bright,
+now faint, as the burning poison waxed or waned in the bowls of
+the metal pipes. The most lay silent, but some muttered to
+themselves, and others talked together in a strange, low,
+monotonous voice, their conversation coming in gushes, and then
+suddenly tailing off into silence, each mumbling out his own
+thoughts and paying little heed to the words of his neighbour. At
+the farther end was a small brazier of burning charcoal, beside
+which on a three-legged wooden stool there sat a tall, thin old
+man, with his jaw resting upon his two fists, and his elbows upon
+his knees, staring into the fire.
+
+As I entered, a sallow Malay attendant had hurried up with a pipe
+for me and a supply of the drug, beckoning me to an empty berth.
+
+"Thank you. I have not come to stay," said I. "There is a friend
+of mine here, Mr. Isa Whitney, and I wish to speak with him."
+
+There was a movement and an exclamation from my right, and
+peering through the gloom, I saw Whitney, pale, haggard, and
+unkempt, staring out at me.
+
+"My God! It's Watson," said he. He was in a pitiable state of
+reaction, with every nerve in a twitter. "I say, Watson, what
+o'clock is it?"
+
+"Nearly eleven."
+
+"Of what day?"
+
+"Of Friday, June 19th."
+
+"Good heavens! I thought it was Wednesday. It is Wednesday. What
+d'you want to frighten a chap for?" He sank his face onto his
+arms and began to sob in a high treble key.
+
+"I tell you that it is Friday, man. Your wife has been waiting
+this two days for you. You should be ashamed of yourself!"
+
+"So I am. But you've got mixed, Watson, for I have only been here
+a few hours, three pipes, four pipes--I forget how many. But I'll
+go home with you. I wouldn't frighten Kate--poor little Kate.
+Give me your hand! Have you a cab?"
+
+"Yes, I have one waiting."
+
+"Then I shall go in it. But I must owe something. Find what I
+owe, Watson. I am all off colour. I can do nothing for myself."
+
+I walked down the narrow passage between the double row of
+sleepers, holding my breath to keep out the vile, stupefying
+fumes of the drug, and looking about for the manager. As I passed
+the tall man who sat by the brazier I felt a sudden pluck at my
+skirt, and a low voice whispered, "Walk past me, and then look
+back at me." The words fell quite distinctly upon my ear. I
+glanced down. They could only have come from the old man at my
+side, and yet he sat now as absorbed as ever, very thin, very
+wrinkled, bent with age, an opium pipe dangling down from between
+his knees, as though it had dropped in sheer lassitude from his
+fingers. I took two steps forward and looked back. It took all my
+self-control to prevent me from breaking out into a cry of
+astonishment. He had turned his back so that none could see him
+but I. His form had filled out, his wrinkles were gone, the dull
+eyes had regained their fire, and there, sitting by the fire and
+grinning at my surprise, was none other than Sherlock Holmes. He
+made a slight motion to me to approach him, and instantly, as he
+turned his face half round to the company once more, subsided
+into a doddering, loose-lipped senility.
+
+"Holmes!" I whispered, "what on earth are you doing in this den?"
+
+"As low as you can," he answered; "I have excellent ears. If you
+would have the great kindness to get rid of that sottish friend
+of yours I should be exceedingly glad to have a little talk with
+you."
+
+"I have a cab outside."
+
+"Then pray send him home in it. You may safely trust him, for he
+appears to be too limp to get into any mischief. I should
+recommend you also to send a note by the cabman to your wife to
+say that you have thrown in your lot with me. If you will wait
+outside, I shall be with you in five minutes."
+
+It was difficult to refuse any of Sherlock Holmes' requests, for
+they were always so exceedingly definite, and put forward with
+such a quiet air of mastery. I felt, however, that when Whitney
+was once confined in the cab my mission was practically
+accomplished; and for the rest, I could not wish anything better
+than to be associated with my friend in one of those singular
+adventures which were the normal condition of his existence. In a
+few minutes I had written my note, paid Whitney's bill, led him
+out to the cab, and seen him driven through the darkness. In a
+very short time a decrepit figure had emerged from the opium den,
+and I was walking down the street with Sherlock Holmes. For two
+streets he shuffled along with a bent back and an uncertain foot.
+Then, glancing quickly round, he straightened himself out and
+burst into a hearty fit of laughter.
+
+"I suppose, Watson," said he, "that you imagine that I have added
+opium-smoking to cocaine injections, and all the other little
+weaknesses on which you have favoured me with your medical
+views."
+
+"I was certainly surprised to find you there."
+
+"But not more so than I to find you."
+
+"I came to find a friend."
+
+"And I to find an enemy."
+
+"An enemy?"
+
+"Yes; one of my natural enemies, or, shall I say, my natural
+prey. Briefly, Watson, I am in the midst of a very remarkable
+inquiry, and I have hoped to find a clue in the incoherent
+ramblings of these sots, as I have done before now. Had I been
+recognised in that den my life would not have been worth an
+hour's purchase; for I have used it before now for my own
+purposes, and the rascally Lascar who runs it has sworn to have
+vengeance upon me. There is a trap-door at the back of that
+building, near the corner of Paul's Wharf, which could tell some
+strange tales of what has passed through it upon the moonless
+nights."
+
+"What! You do not mean bodies?"
+
+"Ay, bodies, Watson. We should be rich men if we had 1000 pounds
+for every poor devil who has been done to death in that den. It
+is the vilest murder-trap on the whole riverside, and I fear that
+Neville St. Clair has entered it never to leave it more. But our
+trap should be here." He put his two forefingers between his
+teeth and whistled shrilly--a signal which was answered by a
+similar whistle from the distance, followed shortly by the rattle
+of wheels and the clink of horses' hoofs.
+
+"Now, Watson," said Holmes, as a tall dog-cart dashed up through
+the gloom, throwing out two golden tunnels of yellow light from
+its side lanterns. "You'll come with me, won't you?"
+
+"If I can be of use."
+
+"Oh, a trusty comrade is always of use; and a chronicler still
+more so. My room at The Cedars is a double-bedded one."
+
+"The Cedars?"
+
+"Yes; that is Mr. St. Clair's house. I am staying there while I
+conduct the inquiry."
+
+"Where is it, then?"
+
+"Near Lee, in Kent. We have a seven-mile drive before us."
+
+"But I am all in the dark."
+
+"Of course you are. You'll know all about it presently. Jump up
+here. All right, John; we shall not need you. Here's half a
+crown. Look out for me to-morrow, about eleven. Give her her
+head. So long, then!"
+
+He flicked the horse with his whip, and we dashed away through
+the endless succession of sombre and deserted streets, which
+widened gradually, until we were flying across a broad
+balustraded bridge, with the murky river flowing sluggishly
+beneath us. Beyond lay another dull wilderness of bricks and
+mortar, its silence broken only by the heavy, regular footfall of
+the policeman, or the songs and shouts of some belated party of
+revellers. A dull wrack was drifting slowly across the sky, and a
+star or two twinkled dimly here and there through the rifts of
+the clouds. Holmes drove in silence, with his head sunk upon his
+breast, and the air of a man who is lost in thought, while I sat
+beside him, curious to learn what this new quest might be which
+seemed to tax his powers so sorely, and yet afraid to break in
+upon the current of his thoughts. We had driven several miles,
+and were beginning to get to the fringe of the belt of suburban
+villas, when he shook himself, shrugged his shoulders, and lit up
+his pipe with the air of a man who has satisfied himself that he
+is acting for the best.
+
+"You have a grand gift of silence, Watson," said he. "It makes
+you quite invaluable as a companion. 'Pon my word, it is a great
+thing for me to have someone to talk to, for my own thoughts are
+not over-pleasant. I was wondering what I should say to this dear
+little woman to-night when she meets me at the door."
+
+"You forget that I know nothing about it."
+
+"I shall just have time to tell you the facts of the case before
+we get to Lee. It seems absurdly simple, and yet, somehow I can
+get nothing to go upon. There's plenty of thread, no doubt, but I
+can't get the end of it into my hand. Now, I'll state the case
+clearly and concisely to you, Watson, and maybe you can see a
+spark where all is dark to me."
+
+"Proceed, then."
+
+"Some years ago--to be definite, in May, 1884--there came to Lee
+a gentleman, Neville St. Clair by name, who appeared to have
+plenty of money. He took a large villa, laid out the grounds very
+nicely, and lived generally in good style. By degrees he made
+friends in the neighbourhood, and in 1887 he married the daughter
+of a local brewer, by whom he now has two children. He had no
+occupation, but was interested in several companies and went into
+town as a rule in the morning, returning by the 5:14 from Cannon
+Street every night. Mr. St. Clair is now thirty-seven years of
+age, is a man of temperate habits, a good husband, a very
+affectionate father, and a man who is popular with all who know
+him. I may add that his whole debts at the present moment, as far
+as we have been able to ascertain, amount to 88 pounds 10s., while
+he has 220 pounds standing to his credit in the Capital and
+Counties Bank. There is no reason, therefore, to think that money
+troubles have been weighing upon his mind.
+
+"Last Monday Mr. Neville St. Clair went into town rather earlier
+than usual, remarking before he started that he had two important
+commissions to perform, and that he would bring his little boy
+home a box of bricks. Now, by the merest chance, his wife
+received a telegram upon this same Monday, very shortly after his
+departure, to the effect that a small parcel of considerable
+value which she had been expecting was waiting for her at the
+offices of the Aberdeen Shipping Company. Now, if you are well up
+in your London, you will know that the office of the company is
+in Fresno Street, which branches out of Upper Swandam Lane, where
+you found me to-night. Mrs. St. Clair had her lunch, started for
+the City, did some shopping, proceeded to the company's office,
+got her packet, and found herself at exactly 4:35 walking through
+Swandam Lane on her way back to the station. Have you followed me
+so far?"
+
+"It is very clear."
+
+"If you remember, Monday was an exceedingly hot day, and Mrs. St.
+Clair walked slowly, glancing about in the hope of seeing a cab,
+as she did not like the neighbourhood in which she found herself.
+While she was walking in this way down Swandam Lane, she suddenly
+heard an ejaculation or cry, and was struck cold to see her
+husband looking down at her and, as it seemed to her, beckoning
+to her from a second-floor window. The window was open, and she
+distinctly saw his face, which she describes as being terribly
+agitated. He waved his hands frantically to her, and then
+vanished from the window so suddenly that it seemed to her that
+he had been plucked back by some irresistible force from behind.
+One singular point which struck her quick feminine eye was that
+although he wore some dark coat, such as he had started to town
+in, he had on neither collar nor necktie.
+
+"Convinced that something was amiss with him, she rushed down the
+steps--for the house was none other than the opium den in which
+you found me to-night--and running through the front room she
+attempted to ascend the stairs which led to the first floor. At
+the foot of the stairs, however, she met this Lascar scoundrel of
+whom I have spoken, who thrust her back and, aided by a Dane, who
+acts as assistant there, pushed her out into the street. Filled
+with the most maddening doubts and fears, she rushed down the
+lane and, by rare good-fortune, met in Fresno Street a number of
+constables with an inspector, all on their way to their beat. The
+inspector and two men accompanied her back, and in spite of the
+continued resistance of the proprietor, they made their way to
+the room in which Mr. St. Clair had last been seen. There was no
+sign of him there. In fact, in the whole of that floor there was
+no one to be found save a crippled wretch of hideous aspect, who,
+it seems, made his home there. Both he and the Lascar stoutly
+swore that no one else had been in the front room during the
+afternoon. So determined was their denial that the inspector was
+staggered, and had almost come to believe that Mrs. St. Clair had
+been deluded when, with a cry, she sprang at a small deal box
+which lay upon the table and tore the lid from it. Out there fell
+a cascade of children's bricks. It was the toy which he had
+promised to bring home.
+
+"This discovery, and the evident confusion which the cripple
+showed, made the inspector realise that the matter was serious.
+The rooms were carefully examined, and results all pointed to an
+abominable crime. The front room was plainly furnished as a
+sitting-room and led into a small bedroom, which looked out upon
+the back of one of the wharves. Between the wharf and the bedroom
+window is a narrow strip, which is dry at low tide but is covered
+at high tide with at least four and a half feet of water. The
+bedroom window was a broad one and opened from below. On
+examination traces of blood were to be seen upon the windowsill,
+and several scattered drops were visible upon the wooden floor of
+the bedroom. Thrust away behind a curtain in the front room were
+all the clothes of Mr. Neville St. Clair, with the exception of
+his coat. His boots, his socks, his hat, and his watch--all were
+there. There were no signs of violence upon any of these
+garments, and there were no other traces of Mr. Neville St.
+Clair. Out of the window he must apparently have gone for no
+other exit could be discovered, and the ominous bloodstains upon
+the sill gave little promise that he could save himself by
+swimming, for the tide was at its very highest at the moment of
+the tragedy.
+
+"And now as to the villains who seemed to be immediately
+implicated in the matter. The Lascar was known to be a man of the
+vilest antecedents, but as, by Mrs. St. Clair's story, he was
+known to have been at the foot of the stair within a very few
+seconds of her husband's appearance at the window, he could
+hardly have been more than an accessory to the crime. His defence
+was one of absolute ignorance, and he protested that he had no
+knowledge as to the doings of Hugh Boone, his lodger, and that he
+could not account in any way for the presence of the missing
+gentleman's clothes.
+
+"So much for the Lascar manager. Now for the sinister cripple who
+lives upon the second floor of the opium den, and who was
+certainly the last human being whose eyes rested upon Neville St.
+Clair. His name is Hugh Boone, and his hideous face is one which
+is familiar to every man who goes much to the City. He is a
+professional beggar, though in order to avoid the police
+regulations he pretends to a small trade in wax vestas. Some
+little distance down Threadneedle Street, upon the left-hand
+side, there is, as you may have remarked, a small angle in the
+wall. Here it is that this creature takes his daily seat,
+cross-legged with his tiny stock of matches on his lap, and as he
+is a piteous spectacle a small rain of charity descends into the
+greasy leather cap which lies upon the pavement beside him. I
+have watched the fellow more than once before ever I thought of
+making his professional acquaintance, and I have been surprised
+at the harvest which he has reaped in a short time. His
+appearance, you see, is so remarkable that no one can pass him
+without observing him. A shock of orange hair, a pale face
+disfigured by a horrible scar, which, by its contraction, has
+turned up the outer edge of his upper lip, a bulldog chin, and a
+pair of very penetrating dark eyes, which present a singular
+contrast to the colour of his hair, all mark him out from amid
+the common crowd of mendicants and so, too, does his wit, for he
+is ever ready with a reply to any piece of chaff which may be
+thrown at him by the passers-by. This is the man whom we now
+learn to have been the lodger at the opium den, and to have been
+the last man to see the gentleman of whom we are in quest."
+
+"But a cripple!" said I. "What could he have done single-handed
+against a man in the prime of life?"
+
+"He is a cripple in the sense that he walks with a limp; but in
+other respects he appears to be a powerful and well-nurtured man.
+Surely your medical experience would tell you, Watson, that
+weakness in one limb is often compensated for by exceptional
+strength in the others."
+
+"Pray continue your narrative."
+
+"Mrs. St. Clair had fainted at the sight of the blood upon the
+window, and she was escorted home in a cab by the police, as her
+presence could be of no help to them in their investigations.
+Inspector Barton, who had charge of the case, made a very careful
+examination of the premises, but without finding anything which
+threw any light upon the matter. One mistake had been made in not
+arresting Boone instantly, as he was allowed some few minutes
+during which he might have communicated with his friend the
+Lascar, but this fault was soon remedied, and he was seized and
+searched, without anything being found which could incriminate
+him. There were, it is true, some blood-stains upon his right
+shirt-sleeve, but he pointed to his ring-finger, which had been
+cut near the nail, and explained that the bleeding came from
+there, adding that he had been to the window not long before, and
+that the stains which had been observed there came doubtless from
+the same source. He denied strenuously having ever seen Mr.
+Neville St. Clair and swore that the presence of the clothes in
+his room was as much a mystery to him as to the police. As to
+Mrs. St. Clair's assertion that she had actually seen her husband
+at the window, he declared that she must have been either mad or
+dreaming. He was removed, loudly protesting, to the
+police-station, while the inspector remained upon the premises in
+the hope that the ebbing tide might afford some fresh clue.
+
+"And it did, though they hardly found upon the mud-bank what they
+had feared to find. It was Neville St. Clair's coat, and not
+Neville St. Clair, which lay uncovered as the tide receded. And
+what do you think they found in the pockets?"
+
+"I cannot imagine."
+
+"No, I don't think you would guess. Every pocket stuffed with
+pennies and half-pennies--421 pennies and 270 half-pennies. It
+was no wonder that it had not been swept away by the tide. But a
+human body is a different matter. There is a fierce eddy between
+the wharf and the house. It seemed likely enough that the
+weighted coat had remained when the stripped body had been sucked
+away into the river."
+
+"But I understand that all the other clothes were found in the
+room. Would the body be dressed in a coat alone?"
+
+"No, sir, but the facts might be met speciously enough. Suppose
+that this man Boone had thrust Neville St. Clair through the
+window, there is no human eye which could have seen the deed.
+What would he do then? It would of course instantly strike him
+that he must get rid of the tell-tale garments. He would seize
+the coat, then, and be in the act of throwing it out, when it
+would occur to him that it would swim and not sink. He has little
+time, for he has heard the scuffle downstairs when the wife tried
+to force her way up, and perhaps he has already heard from his
+Lascar confederate that the police are hurrying up the street.
+There is not an instant to be lost. He rushes to some secret
+hoard, where he has accumulated the fruits of his beggary, and he
+stuffs all the coins upon which he can lay his hands into the
+pockets to make sure of the coat's sinking. He throws it out, and
+would have done the same with the other garments had not he heard
+the rush of steps below, and only just had time to close the
+window when the police appeared."
+
+"It certainly sounds feasible."
+
+"Well, we will take it as a working hypothesis for want of a
+better. Boone, as I have told you, was arrested and taken to the
+station, but it could not be shown that there had ever before
+been anything against him. He had for years been known as a
+professional beggar, but his life appeared to have been a very
+quiet and innocent one. There the matter stands at present, and
+the questions which have to be solved--what Neville St. Clair was
+doing in the opium den, what happened to him when there, where is
+he now, and what Hugh Boone had to do with his disappearance--are
+all as far from a solution as ever. I confess that I cannot
+recall any case within my experience which looked at the first
+glance so simple and yet which presented such difficulties."
+
+While Sherlock Holmes had been detailing this singular series of
+events, we had been whirling through the outskirts of the great
+town until the last straggling houses had been left behind, and
+we rattled along with a country hedge upon either side of us.
+Just as he finished, however, we drove through two scattered
+villages, where a few lights still glimmered in the windows.
+
+"We are on the outskirts of Lee," said my companion. "We have
+touched on three English counties in our short drive, starting in
+Middlesex, passing over an angle of Surrey, and ending in Kent.
+See that light among the trees? That is The Cedars, and beside
+that lamp sits a woman whose anxious ears have already, I have
+little doubt, caught the clink of our horse's feet."
+
+"But why are you not conducting the case from Baker Street?" I
+asked.
+
+"Because there are many inquiries which must be made out here.
+Mrs. St. Clair has most kindly put two rooms at my disposal, and
+you may rest assured that she will have nothing but a welcome for
+my friend and colleague. I hate to meet her, Watson, when I have
+no news of her husband. Here we are. Whoa, there, whoa!"
+
+We had pulled up in front of a large villa which stood within its
+own grounds. A stable-boy had run out to the horse's head, and
+springing down, I followed Holmes up the small, winding
+gravel-drive which led to the house. As we approached, the door
+flew open, and a little blonde woman stood in the opening, clad
+in some sort of light mousseline de soie, with a touch of fluffy
+pink chiffon at her neck and wrists. She stood with her figure
+outlined against the flood of light, one hand upon the door, one
+half-raised in her eagerness, her body slightly bent, her head
+and face protruded, with eager eyes and parted lips, a standing
+question.
+
+"Well?" she cried, "well?" And then, seeing that there were two
+of us, she gave a cry of hope which sank into a groan as she saw
+that my companion shook his head and shrugged his shoulders.
+
+"No good news?"
+
+"None."
+
+"No bad?"
+
+"No."
+
+"Thank God for that. But come in. You must be weary, for you have
+had a long day."
+
+"This is my friend, Dr. Watson. He has been of most vital use to
+me in several of my cases, and a lucky chance has made it
+possible for me to bring him out and associate him with this
+investigation."
+
+"I am delighted to see you," said she, pressing my hand warmly.
+"You will, I am sure, forgive anything that may be wanting in our
+arrangements, when you consider the blow which has come so
+suddenly upon us."
+
+"My dear madam," said I, "I am an old campaigner, and if I were
+not I can very well see that no apology is needed. If I can be of
+any assistance, either to you or to my friend here, I shall be
+indeed happy."
+
+"Now, Mr. Sherlock Holmes," said the lady as we entered a
+well-lit dining-room, upon the table of which a cold supper had
+been laid out, "I should very much like to ask you one or two
+plain questions, to which I beg that you will give a plain
+answer."
+
+"Certainly, madam."
+
+"Do not trouble about my feelings. I am not hysterical, nor given
+to fainting. I simply wish to hear your real, real opinion."
+
+"Upon what point?"
+
+"In your heart of hearts, do you think that Neville is alive?"
+
+Sherlock Holmes seemed to be embarrassed by the question.
+"Frankly, now!" she repeated, standing upon the rug and looking
+keenly down at him as he leaned back in a basket-chair.
+
+"Frankly, then, madam, I do not."
+
+"You think that he is dead?"
+
+"I do."
+
+"Murdered?"
+
+"I don't say that. Perhaps."
+
+"And on what day did he meet his death?"
+
+"On Monday."
+
+"Then perhaps, Mr. Holmes, you will be good enough to explain how
+it is that I have received a letter from him to-day."
+
+Sherlock Holmes sprang out of his chair as if he had been
+galvanised.
+
+"What!" he roared.
+
+"Yes, to-day." She stood smiling, holding up a little slip of
+paper in the air.
+
+"May I see it?"
+
+"Certainly."
+
+He snatched it from her in his eagerness, and smoothing it out
+upon the table he drew over the lamp and examined it intently. I
+had left my chair and was gazing at it over his shoulder. The
+envelope was a very coarse one and was stamped with the Gravesend
+postmark and with the date of that very day, or rather of the day
+before, for it was considerably after midnight.
+
+"Coarse writing," murmured Holmes. "Surely this is not your
+husband's writing, madam."
+
+"No, but the enclosure is."
+
+"I perceive also that whoever addressed the envelope had to go
+and inquire as to the address."
+
+"How can you tell that?"
+
+"The name, you see, is in perfectly black ink, which has dried
+itself. The rest is of the greyish colour, which shows that
+blotting-paper has been used. If it had been written straight
+off, and then blotted, none would be of a deep black shade. This
+man has written the name, and there has then been a pause before
+he wrote the address, which can only mean that he was not
+familiar with it. It is, of course, a trifle, but there is
+nothing so important as trifles. Let us now see the letter. Ha!
+there has been an enclosure here!"
+
+"Yes, there was a ring. His signet-ring."
+
+"And you are sure that this is your husband's hand?"
+
+"One of his hands."
+
+"One?"
+
+"His hand when he wrote hurriedly. It is very unlike his usual
+writing, and yet I know it well."
+
+"'Dearest do not be frightened. All will come well. There is a
+huge error which it may take some little time to rectify.
+Wait in patience.--NEVILLE.' Written in pencil upon the fly-leaf
+of a book, octavo size, no water-mark. Hum! Posted to-day in
+Gravesend by a man with a dirty thumb. Ha! And the flap has been
+gummed, if I am not very much in error, by a person who had been
+chewing tobacco. And you have no doubt that it is your husband's
+hand, madam?"
+
+"None. Neville wrote those words."
+
+"And they were posted to-day at Gravesend. Well, Mrs. St. Clair,
+the clouds lighten, though I should not venture to say that the
+danger is over."
+
+"But he must be alive, Mr. Holmes."
+
+"Unless this is a clever forgery to put us on the wrong scent.
+The ring, after all, proves nothing. It may have been taken from
+him."
+
+"No, no; it is, it is his very own writing!"
+
+"Very well. It may, however, have been written on Monday and only
+posted to-day."
+
+"That is possible."
+
+"If so, much may have happened between."
+
+"Oh, you must not discourage me, Mr. Holmes. I know that all is
+well with him. There is so keen a sympathy between us that I
+should know if evil came upon him. On the very day that I saw him
+last he cut himself in the bedroom, and yet I in the dining-room
+rushed upstairs instantly with the utmost certainty that
+something had happened. Do you think that I would respond to such
+a trifle and yet be ignorant of his death?"
+
+"I have seen too much not to know that the impression of a woman
+may be more valuable than the conclusion of an analytical
+reasoner. And in this letter you certainly have a very strong
+piece of evidence to corroborate your view. But if your husband
+is alive and able to write letters, why should he remain away
+from you?"
+
+"I cannot imagine. It is unthinkable."
+
+"And on Monday he made no remarks before leaving you?"
+
+"No."
+
+"And you were surprised to see him in Swandam Lane?"
+
+"Very much so."
+
+"Was the window open?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"Then he might have called to you?"
+
+"He might."
+
+"He only, as I understand, gave an inarticulate cry?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"A call for help, you thought?"
+
+"Yes. He waved his hands."
+
+"But it might have been a cry of surprise. Astonishment at the
+unexpected sight of you might cause him to throw up his hands?"
+
+"It is possible."
+
+"And you thought he was pulled back?"
+
+"He disappeared so suddenly."
+
+"He might have leaped back. You did not see anyone else in the
+room?"
+
+"No, but this horrible man confessed to having been there, and
+the Lascar was at the foot of the stairs."
+
+"Quite so. Your husband, as far as you could see, had his
+ordinary clothes on?"
+
+"But without his collar or tie. I distinctly saw his bare
+throat."
+
+"Had he ever spoken of Swandam Lane?"
+
+"Never."
+
+"Had he ever showed any signs of having taken opium?"
+
+"Never."
+
+"Thank you, Mrs. St. Clair. Those are the principal points about
+which I wished to be absolutely clear. We shall now have a little
+supper and then retire, for we may have a very busy day
+to-morrow."
+
+A large and comfortable double-bedded room had been placed at our
+disposal, and I was quickly between the sheets, for I was weary
+after my night of adventure. Sherlock Holmes was a man, however,
+who, when he had an unsolved problem upon his mind, would go for
+days, and even for a week, without rest, turning it over,
+rearranging his facts, looking at it from every point of view
+until he had either fathomed it or convinced himself that his
+data were insufficient. It was soon evident to me that he was now
+preparing for an all-night sitting. He took off his coat and
+waistcoat, put on a large blue dressing-gown, and then wandered
+about the room collecting pillows from his bed and cushions from
+the sofa and armchairs. With these he constructed a sort of
+Eastern divan, upon which he perched himself cross-legged, with
+an ounce of shag tobacco and a box of matches laid out in front
+of him. In the dim light of the lamp I saw him sitting there, an
+old briar pipe between his lips, his eyes fixed vacantly upon the
+corner of the ceiling, the blue smoke curling up from him,
+silent, motionless, with the light shining upon his strong-set
+aquiline features. So he sat as I dropped off to sleep, and so he
+sat when a sudden ejaculation caused me to wake up, and I found
+the summer sun shining into the apartment. The pipe was still
+between his lips, the smoke still curled upward, and the room was
+full of a dense tobacco haze, but nothing remained of the heap of
+shag which I had seen upon the previous night.
+
+"Awake, Watson?" he asked.
+
+"Yes."
+
+"Game for a morning drive?"
+
+"Certainly."
+
+"Then dress. No one is stirring yet, but I know where the
+stable-boy sleeps, and we shall soon have the trap out." He
+chuckled to himself as he spoke, his eyes twinkled, and he seemed
+a different man to the sombre thinker of the previous night.
+
+As I dressed I glanced at my watch. It was no wonder that no one
+was stirring. It was twenty-five minutes past four. I had hardly
+finished when Holmes returned with the news that the boy was
+putting in the horse.
+
+"I want to test a little theory of mine," said he, pulling on his
+boots. "I think, Watson, that you are now standing in the
+presence of one of the most absolute fools in Europe. I deserve
+to be kicked from here to Charing Cross. But I think I have the
+key of the affair now."
+
+"And where is it?" I asked, smiling.
+
+"In the bathroom," he answered. "Oh, yes, I am not joking," he
+continued, seeing my look of incredulity. "I have just been
+there, and I have taken it out, and I have got it in this
+Gladstone bag. Come on, my boy, and we shall see whether it will
+not fit the lock."
+
+We made our way downstairs as quietly as possible, and out into
+the bright morning sunshine. In the road stood our horse and
+trap, with the half-clad stable-boy waiting at the head. We both
+sprang in, and away we dashed down the London Road. A few country
+carts were stirring, bearing in vegetables to the metropolis, but
+the lines of villas on either side were as silent and lifeless as
+some city in a dream.
+
+"It has been in some points a singular case," said Holmes,
+flicking the horse on into a gallop. "I confess that I have been
+as blind as a mole, but it is better to learn wisdom late than
+never to learn it at all."
+
+In town the earliest risers were just beginning to look sleepily
+from their windows as we drove through the streets of the Surrey
+side. Passing down the Waterloo Bridge Road we crossed over the
+river, and dashing up Wellington Street wheeled sharply to the
+right and found ourselves in Bow Street. Sherlock Holmes was well
+known to the force, and the two constables at the door saluted
+him. One of them held the horse's head while the other led us in.
+
+"Who is on duty?" asked Holmes.
+
+"Inspector Bradstreet, sir."
+
+"Ah, Bradstreet, how are you?" A tall, stout official had come
+down the stone-flagged passage, in a peaked cap and frogged
+jacket. "I wish to have a quiet word with you, Bradstreet."
+"Certainly, Mr. Holmes. Step into my room here." It was a small,
+office-like room, with a huge ledger upon the table, and a
+telephone projecting from the wall. The inspector sat down at his
+desk.
+
+"What can I do for you, Mr. Holmes?"
+
+"I called about that beggarman, Boone--the one who was charged
+with being concerned in the disappearance of Mr. Neville St.
+Clair, of Lee."
+
+"Yes. He was brought up and remanded for further inquiries."
+
+"So I heard. You have him here?"
+
+"In the cells."
+
+"Is he quiet?"
+
+"Oh, he gives no trouble. But he is a dirty scoundrel."
+
+"Dirty?"
+
+"Yes, it is all we can do to make him wash his hands, and his
+face is as black as a tinker's. Well, when once his case has been
+settled, he will have a regular prison bath; and I think, if you
+saw him, you would agree with me that he needed it."
+
+"I should like to see him very much."
+
+"Would you? That is easily done. Come this way. You can leave
+your bag."
+
+"No, I think that I'll take it."
+
+"Very good. Come this way, if you please." He led us down a
+passage, opened a barred door, passed down a winding stair, and
+brought us to a whitewashed corridor with a line of doors on each
+side.
+
+"The third on the right is his," said the inspector. "Here it
+is!" He quietly shot back a panel in the upper part of the door
+and glanced through.
+
+"He is asleep," said he. "You can see him very well."
+
+We both put our eyes to the grating. The prisoner lay with his
+face towards us, in a very deep sleep, breathing slowly and
+heavily. He was a middle-sized man, coarsely clad as became his
+calling, with a coloured shirt protruding through the rent in his
+tattered coat. He was, as the inspector had said, extremely
+dirty, but the grime which covered his face could not conceal its
+repulsive ugliness. A broad wheal from an old scar ran right
+across it from eye to chin, and by its contraction had turned up
+one side of the upper lip, so that three teeth were exposed in a
+perpetual snarl. A shock of very bright red hair grew low over
+his eyes and forehead.
+
+"He's a beauty, isn't he?" said the inspector.
+
+"He certainly needs a wash," remarked Holmes. "I had an idea that
+he might, and I took the liberty of bringing the tools with me."
+He opened the Gladstone bag as he spoke, and took out, to my
+astonishment, a very large bath-sponge.
+
+"He! he! You are a funny one," chuckled the inspector.
+
+"Now, if you will have the great goodness to open that door very
+quietly, we will soon make him cut a much more respectable
+figure."
+
+"Well, I don't know why not," said the inspector. "He doesn't
+look a credit to the Bow Street cells, does he?" He slipped his
+key into the lock, and we all very quietly entered the cell. The
+sleeper half turned, and then settled down once more into a deep
+slumber. Holmes stooped to the water-jug, moistened his sponge,
+and then rubbed it twice vigorously across and down the
+prisoner's face.
+
+"Let me introduce you," he shouted, "to Mr. Neville St. Clair, of
+Lee, in the county of Kent."
+
+Never in my life have I seen such a sight. The man's face peeled
+off under the sponge like the bark from a tree. Gone was the
+coarse brown tint! Gone, too, was the horrid scar which had
+seamed it across, and the twisted lip which had given the
+repulsive sneer to the face! A twitch brought away the tangled
+red hair, and there, sitting up in his bed, was a pale,
+sad-faced, refined-looking man, black-haired and smooth-skinned,
+rubbing his eyes and staring about him with sleepy bewilderment.
+Then suddenly realising the exposure, he broke into a scream and
+threw himself down with his face to the pillow.
+
+"Great heavens!" cried the inspector, "it is, indeed, the missing
+man. I know him from the photograph."
+
+The prisoner turned with the reckless air of a man who abandons
+himself to his destiny. "Be it so," said he. "And pray what am I
+charged with?"
+
+"With making away with Mr. Neville St.-- Oh, come, you can't be
+charged with that unless they make a case of attempted suicide of
+it," said the inspector with a grin. "Well, I have been
+twenty-seven years in the force, but this really takes the cake."
+
+"If I am Mr. Neville St. Clair, then it is obvious that no crime
+has been committed, and that, therefore, I am illegally
+detained."
+
+"No crime, but a very great error has been committed," said
+Holmes. "You would have done better to have trusted your wife."
+
+"It was not the wife; it was the children," groaned the prisoner.
+"God help me, I would not have them ashamed of their father. My
+God! What an exposure! What can I do?"
+
+Sherlock Holmes sat down beside him on the couch and patted him
+kindly on the shoulder.
+
+"If you leave it to a court of law to clear the matter up," said
+he, "of course you can hardly avoid publicity. On the other hand,
+if you convince the police authorities that there is no possible
+case against you, I do not know that there is any reason that the
+details should find their way into the papers. Inspector
+Bradstreet would, I am sure, make notes upon anything which you
+might tell us and submit it to the proper authorities. The case
+would then never go into court at all."
+
+"God bless you!" cried the prisoner passionately. "I would have
+endured imprisonment, ay, even execution, rather than have left
+my miserable secret as a family blot to my children.
+
+"You are the first who have ever heard my story. My father was a
+schoolmaster in Chesterfield, where I received an excellent
+education. I travelled in my youth, took to the stage, and
+finally became a reporter on an evening paper in London. One day
+my editor wished to have a series of articles upon begging in the
+metropolis, and I volunteered to supply them. There was the point
+from which all my adventures started. It was only by trying
+begging as an amateur that I could get the facts upon which to
+base my articles. When an actor I had, of course, learned all the
+secrets of making up, and had been famous in the green-room for
+my skill. I took advantage now of my attainments. I painted my
+face, and to make myself as pitiable as possible I made a good
+scar and fixed one side of my lip in a twist by the aid of a
+small slip of flesh-coloured plaster. Then with a red head of
+hair, and an appropriate dress, I took my station in the business
+part of the city, ostensibly as a match-seller but really as a
+beggar. For seven hours I plied my trade, and when I returned
+home in the evening I found to my surprise that I had received no
+less than 26s. 4d.
+
+"I wrote my articles and thought little more of the matter until,
+some time later, I backed a bill for a friend and had a writ
+served upon me for 25 pounds. I was at my wit's end where to get
+the money, but a sudden idea came to me. I begged a fortnight's
+grace from the creditor, asked for a holiday from my employers,
+and spent the time in begging in the City under my disguise. In
+ten days I had the money and had paid the debt.
+
+"Well, you can imagine how hard it was to settle down to arduous
+work at 2 pounds a week when I knew that I could earn as much in
+a day by smearing my face with a little paint, laying my cap on
+the ground, and sitting still. It was a long fight between my
+pride and the money, but the dollars won at last, and I threw up
+reporting and sat day after day in the corner which I had first
+chosen, inspiring pity by my ghastly face and filling my pockets
+with coppers. Only one man knew my secret. He was the keeper of a
+low den in which I used to lodge in Swandam Lane, where I could
+every morning emerge as a squalid beggar and in the evenings
+transform myself into a well-dressed man about town. This fellow,
+a Lascar, was well paid by me for his rooms, so that I knew that
+my secret was safe in his possession.
+
+"Well, very soon I found that I was saving considerable sums of
+money. I do not mean that any beggar in the streets of London
+could earn 700 pounds a year--which is less than my average
+takings--but I had exceptional advantages in my power of making
+up, and also in a facility of repartee, which improved by
+practice and made me quite a recognised character in the City.
+All day a stream of pennies, varied by silver, poured in upon me,
+and it was a very bad day in which I failed to take 2 pounds.
+
+"As I grew richer I grew more ambitious, took a house in the
+country, and eventually married, without anyone having a
+suspicion as to my real occupation. My dear wife knew that I had
+business in the City. She little knew what.
+
+"Last Monday I had finished for the day and was dressing in my
+room above the opium den when I looked out of my window and saw,
+to my horror and astonishment, that my wife was standing in the
+street, with her eyes fixed full upon me. I gave a cry of
+surprise, threw up my arms to cover my face, and, rushing to my
+confidant, the Lascar, entreated him to prevent anyone from
+coming up to me. I heard her voice downstairs, but I knew that
+she could not ascend. Swiftly I threw off my clothes, pulled on
+those of a beggar, and put on my pigments and wig. Even a wife's
+eyes could not pierce so complete a disguise. But then it
+occurred to me that there might be a search in the room, and that
+the clothes might betray me. I threw open the window, reopening
+by my violence a small cut which I had inflicted upon myself in
+the bedroom that morning. Then I seized my coat, which was
+weighted by the coppers which I had just transferred to it from
+the leather bag in which I carried my takings. I hurled it out of
+the window, and it disappeared into the Thames. The other clothes
+would have followed, but at that moment there was a rush of
+constables up the stair, and a few minutes after I found, rather,
+I confess, to my relief, that instead of being identified as Mr.
+Neville St. Clair, I was arrested as his murderer.
+
+"I do not know that there is anything else for me to explain. I
+was determined to preserve my disguise as long as possible, and
+hence my preference for a dirty face. Knowing that my wife would
+be terribly anxious, I slipped off my ring and confided it to the
+Lascar at a moment when no constable was watching me, together
+with a hurried scrawl, telling her that she had no cause to
+fear."
+
+"That note only reached her yesterday," said Holmes.
+
+"Good God! What a week she must have spent!"
+
+"The police have watched this Lascar," said Inspector Bradstreet,
+"and I can quite understand that he might find it difficult to
+post a letter unobserved. Probably he handed it to some sailor
+customer of his, who forgot all about it for some days."
+
+"That was it," said Holmes, nodding approvingly; "I have no doubt
+of it. But have you never been prosecuted for begging?"
+
+"Many times; but what was a fine to me?"
+
+"It must stop here, however," said Bradstreet. "If the police are
+to hush this thing up, there must be no more of Hugh Boone."
+
+"I have sworn it by the most solemn oaths which a man can take."
+
+"In that case I think that it is probable that no further steps
+may be taken. But if you are found again, then all must come out.
+I am sure, Mr. Holmes, that we are very much indebted to you for
+having cleared the matter up. I wish I knew how you reach your
+results."
+
+"I reached this one," said my friend, "by sitting upon five
+pillows and consuming an ounce of shag. I think, Watson, that if
+we drive to Baker Street we shall just be in time for breakfast."
+
+
+
+VII. THE ADVENTURE OF THE BLUE CARBUNCLE
+
+I had called upon my friend Sherlock Holmes upon the second
+morning after Christmas, with the intention of wishing him the
+compliments of the season. He was lounging upon the sofa in a
+purple dressing-gown, a pipe-rack within his reach upon the
+right, and a pile of crumpled morning papers, evidently newly
+studied, near at hand. Beside the couch was a wooden chair, and
+on the angle of the back hung a very seedy and disreputable
+hard-felt hat, much the worse for wear, and cracked in several
+places. A lens and a forceps lying upon the seat of the chair
+suggested that the hat had been suspended in this manner for the
+purpose of examination.
+
+"You are engaged," said I; "perhaps I interrupt you."
+
+"Not at all. I am glad to have a friend with whom I can discuss
+my results. The matter is a perfectly trivial one"--he jerked his
+thumb in the direction of the old hat--"but there are points in
+connection with it which are not entirely devoid of interest and
+even of instruction."
+
+I seated myself in his armchair and warmed my hands before his
+crackling fire, for a sharp frost had set in, and the windows
+were thick with the ice crystals. "I suppose," I remarked, "that,
+homely as it looks, this thing has some deadly story linked on to
+it--that it is the clue which will guide you in the solution of
+some mystery and the punishment of some crime."
+
+"No, no. No crime," said Sherlock Holmes, laughing. "Only one of
+those whimsical little incidents which will happen when you have
+four million human beings all jostling each other within the
+space of a few square miles. Amid the action and reaction of so
+dense a swarm of humanity, every possible combination of events
+may be expected to take place, and many a little problem will be
+presented which may be striking and bizarre without being
+criminal. We have already had experience of such."
+
+"So much so," I remarked, "that of the last six cases which I
+have added to my notes, three have been entirely free of any
+legal crime."
+
+"Precisely. You allude to my attempt to recover the Irene Adler
+papers, to the singular case of Miss Mary Sutherland, and to the
+adventure of the man with the twisted lip. Well, I have no doubt
+that this small matter will fall into the same innocent category.
+You know Peterson, the commissionaire?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"It is to him that this trophy belongs."
+
+"It is his hat."
+
+"No, no, he found it. Its owner is unknown. I beg that you will
+look upon it not as a battered billycock but as an intellectual
+problem. And, first, as to how it came here. It arrived upon
+Christmas morning, in company with a good fat goose, which is, I
+have no doubt, roasting at this moment in front of Peterson's
+fire. The facts are these: about four o'clock on Christmas
+morning, Peterson, who, as you know, is a very honest fellow, was
+returning from some small jollification and was making his way
+homeward down Tottenham Court Road. In front of him he saw, in
+the gaslight, a tallish man, walking with a slight stagger, and
+carrying a white goose slung over his shoulder. As he reached the
+corner of Goodge Street, a row broke out between this stranger
+and a little knot of roughs. One of the latter knocked off the
+man's hat, on which he raised his stick to defend himself and,
+swinging it over his head, smashed the shop window behind him.
+Peterson had rushed forward to protect the stranger from his
+assailants; but the man, shocked at having broken the window, and
+seeing an official-looking person in uniform rushing towards him,
+dropped his goose, took to his heels, and vanished amid the
+labyrinth of small streets which lie at the back of Tottenham
+Court Road. The roughs had also fled at the appearance of
+Peterson, so that he was left in possession of the field of
+battle, and also of the spoils of victory in the shape of this
+battered hat and a most unimpeachable Christmas goose."
+
+"Which surely he restored to their owner?"
+
+"My dear fellow, there lies the problem. It is true that 'For
+Mrs. Henry Baker' was printed upon a small card which was tied to
+the bird's left leg, and it is also true that the initials 'H.
+B.' are legible upon the lining of this hat, but as there are
+some thousands of Bakers, and some hundreds of Henry Bakers in
+this city of ours, it is not easy to restore lost property to any
+one of them."
+
+"What, then, did Peterson do?"
+
+"He brought round both hat and goose to me on Christmas morning,
+knowing that even the smallest problems are of interest to me.
+The goose we retained until this morning, when there were signs
+that, in spite of the slight frost, it would be well that it
+should be eaten without unnecessary delay. Its finder has carried
+it off, therefore, to fulfil the ultimate destiny of a goose,
+while I continue to retain the hat of the unknown gentleman who
+lost his Christmas dinner."
+
+"Did he not advertise?"
+
+"No."
+
+"Then, what clue could you have as to his identity?"
+
+"Only as much as we can deduce."
+
+"From his hat?"
+
+"Precisely."
+
+"But you are joking. What can you gather from this old battered
+felt?"
+
+"Here is my lens. You know my methods. What can you gather
+yourself as to the individuality of the man who has worn this
+article?"
+
+I took the tattered object in my hands and turned it over rather
+ruefully. It was a very ordinary black hat of the usual round
+shape, hard and much the worse for wear. The lining had been of
+red silk, but was a good deal discoloured. There was no maker's
+name; but, as Holmes had remarked, the initials "H. B." were
+scrawled upon one side. It was pierced in the brim for a
+hat-securer, but the elastic was missing. For the rest, it was
+cracked, exceedingly dusty, and spotted in several places,
+although there seemed to have been some attempt to hide the
+discoloured patches by smearing them with ink.
+
+"I can see nothing," said I, handing it back to my friend.
+
+"On the contrary, Watson, you can see everything. You fail,
+however, to reason from what you see. You are too timid in
+drawing your inferences."
+
+"Then, pray tell me what it is that you can infer from this hat?"
+
+He picked it up and gazed at it in the peculiar introspective
+fashion which was characteristic of him. "It is perhaps less
+suggestive than it might have been," he remarked, "and yet there
+are a few inferences which are very distinct, and a few others
+which represent at least a strong balance of probability. That
+the man was highly intellectual is of course obvious upon the
+face of it, and also that he was fairly well-to-do within the
+last three years, although he has now fallen upon evil days. He
+had foresight, but has less now than formerly, pointing to a
+moral retrogression, which, when taken with the decline of his
+fortunes, seems to indicate some evil influence, probably drink,
+at work upon him. This may account also for the obvious fact that
+his wife has ceased to love him."
+
+"My dear Holmes!"
+
+"He has, however, retained some degree of self-respect," he
+continued, disregarding my remonstrance. "He is a man who leads a
+sedentary life, goes out little, is out of training entirely, is
+middle-aged, has grizzled hair which he has had cut within the
+last few days, and which he anoints with lime-cream. These are
+the more patent facts which are to be deduced from his hat. Also,
+by the way, that it is extremely improbable that he has gas laid
+on in his house."
+
+"You are certainly joking, Holmes."
+
+"Not in the least. Is it possible that even now, when I give you
+these results, you are unable to see how they are attained?"
+
+"I have no doubt that I am very stupid, but I must confess that I
+am unable to follow you. For example, how did you deduce that
+this man was intellectual?"
+
+For answer Holmes clapped the hat upon his head. It came right
+over the forehead and settled upon the bridge of his nose. "It is
+a question of cubic capacity," said he; "a man with so large a
+brain must have something in it."
+
+"The decline of his fortunes, then?"
+
+"This hat is three years old. These flat brims curled at the edge
+came in then. It is a hat of the very best quality. Look at the
+band of ribbed silk and the excellent lining. If this man could
+afford to buy so expensive a hat three years ago, and has had no
+hat since, then he has assuredly gone down in the world."
+
+"Well, that is clear enough, certainly. But how about the
+foresight and the moral retrogression?"
+
+Sherlock Holmes laughed. "Here is the foresight," said he putting
+his finger upon the little disc and loop of the hat-securer.
+"They are never sold upon hats. If this man ordered one, it is a
+sign of a certain amount of foresight, since he went out of his
+way to take this precaution against the wind. But since we see
+that he has broken the elastic and has not troubled to replace
+it, it is obvious that he has less foresight now than formerly,
+which is a distinct proof of a weakening nature. On the other
+hand, he has endeavoured to conceal some of these stains upon the
+felt by daubing them with ink, which is a sign that he has not
+entirely lost his self-respect."
+
+"Your reasoning is certainly plausible."
+
+"The further points, that he is middle-aged, that his hair is
+grizzled, that it has been recently cut, and that he uses
+lime-cream, are all to be gathered from a close examination of the
+lower part of the lining. The lens discloses a large number of
+hair-ends, clean cut by the scissors of the barber. They all
+appear to be adhesive, and there is a distinct odour of
+lime-cream. This dust, you will observe, is not the gritty, grey
+dust of the street but the fluffy brown dust of the house,
+showing that it has been hung up indoors most of the time, while
+the marks of moisture upon the inside are proof positive that the
+wearer perspired very freely, and could therefore, hardly be in
+the best of training."
+
+"But his wife--you said that she had ceased to love him."
+
+"This hat has not been brushed for weeks. When I see you, my dear
+Watson, with a week's accumulation of dust upon your hat, and
+when your wife allows you to go out in such a state, I shall fear
+that you also have been unfortunate enough to lose your wife's
+affection."
+
+"But he might be a bachelor."
+
+"Nay, he was bringing home the goose as a peace-offering to his
+wife. Remember the card upon the bird's leg."
+
+"You have an answer to everything. But how on earth do you deduce
+that the gas is not laid on in his house?"
+
+"One tallow stain, or even two, might come by chance; but when I
+see no less than five, I think that there can be little doubt
+that the individual must be brought into frequent contact with
+burning tallow--walks upstairs at night probably with his hat in
+one hand and a guttering candle in the other. Anyhow, he never
+got tallow-stains from a gas-jet. Are you satisfied?"
+
+"Well, it is very ingenious," said I, laughing; "but since, as
+you said just now, there has been no crime committed, and no harm
+done save the loss of a goose, all this seems to be rather a
+waste of energy."
+
+Sherlock Holmes had opened his mouth to reply, when the door flew
+open, and Peterson, the commissionaire, rushed into the apartment
+with flushed cheeks and the face of a man who is dazed with
+astonishment.
+
+"The goose, Mr. Holmes! The goose, sir!" he gasped.
+
+"Eh? What of it, then? Has it returned to life and flapped off
+through the kitchen window?" Holmes twisted himself round upon
+the sofa to get a fairer view of the man's excited face.
+
+"See here, sir! See what my wife found in its crop!" He held out
+his hand and displayed upon the centre of the palm a brilliantly
+scintillating blue stone, rather smaller than a bean in size, but
+of such purity and radiance that it twinkled like an electric
+point in the dark hollow of his hand.
+
+Sherlock Holmes sat up with a whistle. "By Jove, Peterson!" said
+he, "this is treasure trove indeed. I suppose you know what you
+have got?"
+
+"A diamond, sir? A precious stone. It cuts into glass as though
+it were putty."
+
+"It's more than a precious stone. It is the precious stone."
+
+"Not the Countess of Morcar's blue carbuncle!" I ejaculated.
+
+"Precisely so. I ought to know its size and shape, seeing that I
+have read the advertisement about it in The Times every day
+lately. It is absolutely unique, and its value can only be
+conjectured, but the reward offered of 1000 pounds is certainly
+not within a twentieth part of the market price."
+
+"A thousand pounds! Great Lord of mercy!" The commissionaire
+plumped down into a chair and stared from one to the other of us.
+
+"That is the reward, and I have reason to know that there are
+sentimental considerations in the background which would induce
+the Countess to part with half her fortune if she could but
+recover the gem."
+
+"It was lost, if I remember aright, at the Hotel Cosmopolitan," I
+remarked.
+
+"Precisely so, on December 22nd, just five days ago. John Horner,
+a plumber, was accused of having abstracted it from the lady's
+jewel-case. The evidence against him was so strong that the case
+has been referred to the Assizes. I have some account of the
+matter here, I believe." He rummaged amid his newspapers,
+glancing over the dates, until at last he smoothed one out,
+doubled it over, and read the following paragraph:
+
+"Hotel Cosmopolitan Jewel Robbery. John Horner, 26, plumber, was
+brought up upon the charge of having upon the 22nd inst.,
+abstracted from the jewel-case of the Countess of Morcar the
+valuable gem known as the blue carbuncle. James Ryder,
+upper-attendant at the hotel, gave his evidence to the effect
+that he had shown Horner up to the dressing-room of the Countess
+of Morcar upon the day of the robbery in order that he might
+solder the second bar of the grate, which was loose. He had
+remained with Horner some little time, but had finally been
+called away. On returning, he found that Horner had disappeared,
+that the bureau had been forced open, and that the small morocco
+casket in which, as it afterwards transpired, the Countess was
+accustomed to keep her jewel, was lying empty upon the
+dressing-table. Ryder instantly gave the alarm, and Horner was
+arrested the same evening; but the stone could not be found
+either upon his person or in his rooms. Catherine Cusack, maid to
+the Countess, deposed to having heard Ryder's cry of dismay on
+discovering the robbery, and to having rushed into the room,
+where she found matters as described by the last witness.
+Inspector Bradstreet, B division, gave evidence as to the arrest
+of Horner, who struggled frantically, and protested his innocence
+in the strongest terms. Evidence of a previous conviction for
+robbery having been given against the prisoner, the magistrate
+refused to deal summarily with the offence, but referred it to
+the Assizes. Horner, who had shown signs of intense emotion
+during the proceedings, fainted away at the conclusion and was
+carried out of court."
+
+"Hum! So much for the police-court," said Holmes thoughtfully,
+tossing aside the paper. "The question for us now to solve is the
+sequence of events leading from a rifled jewel-case at one end to
+the crop of a goose in Tottenham Court Road at the other. You
+see, Watson, our little deductions have suddenly assumed a much
+more important and less innocent aspect. Here is the stone; the
+stone came from the goose, and the goose came from Mr. Henry
+Baker, the gentleman with the bad hat and all the other
+characteristics with which I have bored you. So now we must set
+ourselves very seriously to finding this gentleman and
+ascertaining what part he has played in this little mystery. To
+do this, we must try the simplest means first, and these lie
+undoubtedly in an advertisement in all the evening papers. If
+this fail, I shall have recourse to other methods."
+
+"What will you say?"
+
+"Give me a pencil and that slip of paper. Now, then: 'Found at
+the corner of Goodge Street, a goose and a black felt hat. Mr.
+Henry Baker can have the same by applying at 6:30 this evening at
+221B, Baker Street.' That is clear and concise."
+
+"Very. But will he see it?"
+
+"Well, he is sure to keep an eye on the papers, since, to a poor
+man, the loss was a heavy one. He was clearly so scared by his
+mischance in breaking the window and by the approach of Peterson
+that he thought of nothing but flight, but since then he must
+have bitterly regretted the impulse which caused him to drop his
+bird. Then, again, the introduction of his name will cause him to
+see it, for everyone who knows him will direct his attention to
+it. Here you are, Peterson, run down to the advertising agency
+and have this put in the evening papers."
+
+"In which, sir?"
+
+"Oh, in the Globe, Star, Pall Mall, St. James's, Evening News,
+Standard, Echo, and any others that occur to you."
+
+"Very well, sir. And this stone?"
+
+"Ah, yes, I shall keep the stone. Thank you. And, I say,
+Peterson, just buy a goose on your way back and leave it here
+with me, for we must have one to give to this gentleman in place
+of the one which your family is now devouring."
+
+When the commissionaire had gone, Holmes took up the stone and
+held it against the light. "It's a bonny thing," said he. "Just
+see how it glints and sparkles. Of course it is a nucleus and
+focus of crime. Every good stone is. They are the devil's pet
+baits. In the larger and older jewels every facet may stand for a
+bloody deed. This stone is not yet twenty years old. It was found
+in the banks of the Amoy River in southern China and is remarkable
+in having every characteristic of the carbuncle, save that it is
+blue in shade instead of ruby red. In spite of its youth, it has
+already a sinister history. There have been two murders, a
+vitriol-throwing, a suicide, and several robberies brought about
+for the sake of this forty-grain weight of crystallised charcoal.
+Who would think that so pretty a toy would be a purveyor to the
+gallows and the prison? I'll lock it up in my strong box now and
+drop a line to the Countess to say that we have it."
+
+"Do you think that this man Horner is innocent?"
+
+"I cannot tell."
+
+"Well, then, do you imagine that this other one, Henry Baker, had
+anything to do with the matter?"
+
+"It is, I think, much more likely that Henry Baker is an
+absolutely innocent man, who had no idea that the bird which he
+was carrying was of considerably more value than if it were made
+of solid gold. That, however, I shall determine by a very simple
+test if we have an answer to our advertisement."
+
+"And you can do nothing until then?"
+
+"Nothing."
+
+"In that case I shall continue my professional round. But I shall
+come back in the evening at the hour you have mentioned, for I
+should like to see the solution of so tangled a business."
+
+"Very glad to see you. I dine at seven. There is a woodcock, I
+believe. By the way, in view of recent occurrences, perhaps I
+ought to ask Mrs. Hudson to examine its crop."
+
+I had been delayed at a case, and it was a little after half-past
+six when I found myself in Baker Street once more. As I
+approached the house I saw a tall man in a Scotch bonnet with a
+coat which was buttoned up to his chin waiting outside in the
+bright semicircle which was thrown from the fanlight. Just as I
+arrived the door was opened, and we were shown up together to
+Holmes' room.
+
+"Mr. Henry Baker, I believe," said he, rising from his armchair
+and greeting his visitor with the easy air of geniality which he
+could so readily assume. "Pray take this chair by the fire, Mr.
+Baker. It is a cold night, and I observe that your circulation is
+more adapted for summer than for winter. Ah, Watson, you have
+just come at the right time. Is that your hat, Mr. Baker?"
+
+"Yes, sir, that is undoubtedly my hat."
+
+He was a large man with rounded shoulders, a massive head, and a
+broad, intelligent face, sloping down to a pointed beard of
+grizzled brown. A touch of red in nose and cheeks, with a slight
+tremor of his extended hand, recalled Holmes' surmise as to his
+habits. His rusty black frock-coat was buttoned right up in
+front, with the collar turned up, and his lank wrists protruded
+from his sleeves without a sign of cuff or shirt. He spoke in a
+slow staccato fashion, choosing his words with care, and gave the
+impression generally of a man of learning and letters who had had
+ill-usage at the hands of fortune.
+
+"We have retained these things for some days," said Holmes,
+"because we expected to see an advertisement from you giving your
+address. I am at a loss to know now why you did not advertise."
+
+Our visitor gave a rather shamefaced laugh. "Shillings have not
+been so plentiful with me as they once were," he remarked. "I had
+no doubt that the gang of roughs who assaulted me had carried off
+both my hat and the bird. I did not care to spend more money in a
+hopeless attempt at recovering them."
+
+"Very naturally. By the way, about the bird, we were compelled to
+eat it."
+
+"To eat it!" Our visitor half rose from his chair in his
+excitement.
+
+"Yes, it would have been of no use to anyone had we not done so.
+But I presume that this other goose upon the sideboard, which is
+about the same weight and perfectly fresh, will answer your
+purpose equally well?"
+
+"Oh, certainly, certainly," answered Mr. Baker with a sigh of
+relief.
+
+"Of course, we still have the feathers, legs, crop, and so on of
+your own bird, so if you wish--"
+
+The man burst into a hearty laugh. "They might be useful to me as
+relics of my adventure," said he, "but beyond that I can hardly
+see what use the disjecta membra of my late acquaintance are
+going to be to me. No, sir, I think that, with your permission, I
+will confine my attentions to the excellent bird which I perceive
+upon the sideboard."
+
+Sherlock Holmes glanced sharply across at me with a slight shrug
+of his shoulders.
+
+"There is your hat, then, and there your bird," said he. "By the
+way, would it bore you to tell me where you got the other one
+from? I am somewhat of a fowl fancier, and I have seldom seen a
+better grown goose."
+
+"Certainly, sir," said Baker, who had risen and tucked his newly
+gained property under his arm. "There are a few of us who
+frequent the Alpha Inn, near the Museum--we are to be found in
+the Museum itself during the day, you understand. This year our
+good host, Windigate by name, instituted a goose club, by which,
+on consideration of some few pence every week, we were each to
+receive a bird at Christmas. My pence were duly paid, and the
+rest is familiar to you. I am much indebted to you, sir, for a
+Scotch bonnet is fitted neither to my years nor my gravity." With
+a comical pomposity of manner he bowed solemnly to both of us and
+strode off upon his way.
+
+"So much for Mr. Henry Baker," said Holmes when he had closed the
+door behind him. "It is quite certain that he knows nothing
+whatever about the matter. Are you hungry, Watson?"
+
+"Not particularly."
+
+"Then I suggest that we turn our dinner into a supper and follow
+up this clue while it is still hot."
+
+"By all means."
+
+It was a bitter night, so we drew on our ulsters and wrapped
+cravats about our throats. Outside, the stars were shining coldly
+in a cloudless sky, and the breath of the passers-by blew out
+into smoke like so many pistol shots. Our footfalls rang out
+crisply and loudly as we swung through the doctors' quarter,
+Wimpole Street, Harley Street, and so through Wigmore Street into
+Oxford Street. In a quarter of an hour we were in Bloomsbury at
+the Alpha Inn, which is a small public-house at the corner of one
+of the streets which runs down into Holborn. Holmes pushed open
+the door of the private bar and ordered two glasses of beer from
+the ruddy-faced, white-aproned landlord.
+
+"Your beer should be excellent if it is as good as your geese,"
+said he.
+
+"My geese!" The man seemed surprised.
+
+"Yes. I was speaking only half an hour ago to Mr. Henry Baker,
+who was a member of your goose club."
+
+"Ah! yes, I see. But you see, sir, them's not our geese."
+
+"Indeed! Whose, then?"
+
+"Well, I got the two dozen from a salesman in Covent Garden."
+
+"Indeed? I know some of them. Which was it?"
+
+"Breckinridge is his name."
+
+"Ah! I don't know him. Well, here's your good health landlord,
+and prosperity to your house. Good-night."
+
+"Now for Mr. Breckinridge," he continued, buttoning up his coat
+as we came out into the frosty air. "Remember, Watson that though
+we have so homely a thing as a goose at one end of this chain, we
+have at the other a man who will certainly get seven years' penal
+servitude unless we can establish his innocence. It is possible
+that our inquiry may but confirm his guilt; but, in any case, we
+have a line of investigation which has been missed by the police,
+and which a singular chance has placed in our hands. Let us
+follow it out to the bitter end. Faces to the south, then, and
+quick march!"
+
+We passed across Holborn, down Endell Street, and so through a
+zigzag of slums to Covent Garden Market. One of the largest
+stalls bore the name of Breckinridge upon it, and the proprietor
+a horsey-looking man, with a sharp face and trim side-whiskers was
+helping a boy to put up the shutters.
+
+"Good-evening. It's a cold night," said Holmes.
+
+The salesman nodded and shot a questioning glance at my
+companion.
+
+"Sold out of geese, I see," continued Holmes, pointing at the
+bare slabs of marble.
+
+"Let you have five hundred to-morrow morning."
+
+"That's no good."
+
+"Well, there are some on the stall with the gas-flare."
+
+"Ah, but I was recommended to you."
+
+"Who by?"
+
+"The landlord of the Alpha."
+
+"Oh, yes; I sent him a couple of dozen."
+
+"Fine birds they were, too. Now where did you get them from?"
+
+To my surprise the question provoked a burst of anger from the
+salesman.
+
+"Now, then, mister," said he, with his head cocked and his arms
+akimbo, "what are you driving at? Let's have it straight, now."
+
+"It is straight enough. I should like to know who sold you the
+geese which you supplied to the Alpha."
+
+"Well then, I shan't tell you. So now!"
+
+"Oh, it is a matter of no importance; but I don't know why you
+should be so warm over such a trifle."
+
+"Warm! You'd be as warm, maybe, if you were as pestered as I am.
+When I pay good money for a good article there should be an end
+of the business; but it's 'Where are the geese?' and 'Who did you
+sell the geese to?' and 'What will you take for the geese?' One
+would think they were the only geese in the world, to hear the
+fuss that is made over them."
+
+"Well, I have no connection with any other people who have been
+making inquiries," said Holmes carelessly. "If you won't tell us
+the bet is off, that is all. But I'm always ready to back my
+opinion on a matter of fowls, and I have a fiver on it that the
+bird I ate is country bred."
+
+"Well, then, you've lost your fiver, for it's town bred," snapped
+the salesman.
+
+"It's nothing of the kind."
+
+"I say it is."
+
+"I don't believe it."
+
+"D'you think you know more about fowls than I, who have handled
+them ever since I was a nipper? I tell you, all those birds that
+went to the Alpha were town bred."
+
+"You'll never persuade me to believe that."
+
+"Will you bet, then?"
+
+"It's merely taking your money, for I know that I am right. But
+I'll have a sovereign on with you, just to teach you not to be
+obstinate."
+
+The salesman chuckled grimly. "Bring me the books, Bill," said
+he.
+
+The small boy brought round a small thin volume and a great
+greasy-backed one, laying them out together beneath the hanging
+lamp.
+
+"Now then, Mr. Cocksure," said the salesman, "I thought that I
+was out of geese, but before I finish you'll find that there is
+still one left in my shop. You see this little book?"
+
+"Well?"
+
+"That's the list of the folk from whom I buy. D'you see? Well,
+then, here on this page are the country folk, and the numbers
+after their names are where their accounts are in the big ledger.
+Now, then! You see this other page in red ink? Well, that is a
+list of my town suppliers. Now, look at that third name. Just
+read it out to me."
+
+"Mrs. Oakshott, 117, Brixton Road--249," read Holmes.
+
+"Quite so. Now turn that up in the ledger."
+
+Holmes turned to the page indicated. "Here you are, 'Mrs.
+Oakshott, 117, Brixton Road, egg and poultry supplier.'"
+
+"Now, then, what's the last entry?"
+
+"'December 22nd. Twenty-four geese at 7s. 6d.'"
+
+"Quite so. There you are. And underneath?"
+
+"'Sold to Mr. Windigate of the Alpha, at 12s.'"
+
+"What have you to say now?"
+
+Sherlock Holmes looked deeply chagrined. He drew a sovereign from
+his pocket and threw it down upon the slab, turning away with the
+air of a man whose disgust is too deep for words. A few yards off
+he stopped under a lamp-post and laughed in the hearty, noiseless
+fashion which was peculiar to him.
+
+"When you see a man with whiskers of that cut and the 'Pink 'un'
+protruding out of his pocket, you can always draw him by a bet,"
+said he. "I daresay that if I had put 100 pounds down in front of
+him, that man would not have given me such complete information
+as was drawn from him by the idea that he was doing me on a
+wager. Well, Watson, we are, I fancy, nearing the end of our
+quest, and the only point which remains to be determined is
+whether we should go on to this Mrs. Oakshott to-night, or
+whether we should reserve it for to-morrow. It is clear from what
+that surly fellow said that there are others besides ourselves
+who are anxious about the matter, and I should--"
+
+His remarks were suddenly cut short by a loud hubbub which broke
+out from the stall which we had just left. Turning round we saw a
+little rat-faced fellow standing in the centre of the circle of
+yellow light which was thrown by the swinging lamp, while
+Breckinridge, the salesman, framed in the door of his stall, was
+shaking his fists fiercely at the cringing figure.
+
+"I've had enough of you and your geese," he shouted. "I wish you
+were all at the devil together. If you come pestering me any more
+with your silly talk I'll set the dog at you. You bring Mrs.
+Oakshott here and I'll answer her, but what have you to do with
+it? Did I buy the geese off you?"
+
+"No; but one of them was mine all the same," whined the little
+man.
+
+"Well, then, ask Mrs. Oakshott for it."
+
+"She told me to ask you."
+
+"Well, you can ask the King of Proosia, for all I care. I've had
+enough of it. Get out of this!" He rushed fiercely forward, and
+the inquirer flitted away into the darkness.
+
+"Ha! this may save us a visit to Brixton Road," whispered Holmes.
+"Come with me, and we will see what is to be made of this
+fellow." Striding through the scattered knots of people who
+lounged round the flaring stalls, my companion speedily overtook
+the little man and touched him upon the shoulder. He sprang
+round, and I could see in the gas-light that every vestige of
+colour had been driven from his face.
+
+"Who are you, then? What do you want?" he asked in a quavering
+voice.
+
+"You will excuse me," said Holmes blandly, "but I could not help
+overhearing the questions which you put to the salesman just now.
+I think that I could be of assistance to you."
+
+"You? Who are you? How could you know anything of the matter?"
+
+"My name is Sherlock Holmes. It is my business to know what other
+people don't know."
+
+"But you can know nothing of this?"
+
+"Excuse me, I know everything of it. You are endeavouring to
+trace some geese which were sold by Mrs. Oakshott, of Brixton
+Road, to a salesman named Breckinridge, by him in turn to Mr.
+Windigate, of the Alpha, and by him to his club, of which Mr.
+Henry Baker is a member."
+
+"Oh, sir, you are the very man whom I have longed to meet," cried
+the little fellow with outstretched hands and quivering fingers.
+"I can hardly explain to you how interested I am in this matter."
+
+Sherlock Holmes hailed a four-wheeler which was passing. "In that
+case we had better discuss it in a cosy room rather than in this
+wind-swept market-place," said he. "But pray tell me, before we
+go farther, who it is that I have the pleasure of assisting."
+
+The man hesitated for an instant. "My name is John Robinson," he
+answered with a sidelong glance.
+
+"No, no; the real name," said Holmes sweetly. "It is always
+awkward doing business with an alias."
+
+A flush sprang to the white cheeks of the stranger. "Well then,"
+said he, "my real name is James Ryder."
+
+"Precisely so. Head attendant at the Hotel Cosmopolitan. Pray
+step into the cab, and I shall soon be able to tell you
+everything which you would wish to know."
+
+The little man stood glancing from one to the other of us with
+half-frightened, half-hopeful eyes, as one who is not sure
+whether he is on the verge of a windfall or of a catastrophe.
+Then he stepped into the cab, and in half an hour we were back in
+the sitting-room at Baker Street. Nothing had been said during
+our drive, but the high, thin breathing of our new companion, and
+the claspings and unclaspings of his hands, spoke of the nervous
+tension within him.
+
+"Here we are!" said Holmes cheerily as we filed into the room.
+"The fire looks very seasonable in this weather. You look cold,
+Mr. Ryder. Pray take the basket-chair. I will just put on my
+slippers before we settle this little matter of yours. Now, then!
+You want to know what became of those geese?"
+
+"Yes, sir."
+
+"Or rather, I fancy, of that goose. It was one bird, I imagine in
+which you were interested--white, with a black bar across the
+tail."
+
+Ryder quivered with emotion. "Oh, sir," he cried, "can you tell
+me where it went to?"
+
+"It came here."
+
+"Here?"
+
+"Yes, and a most remarkable bird it proved. I don't wonder that
+you should take an interest in it. It laid an egg after it was
+dead--the bonniest, brightest little blue egg that ever was seen.
+I have it here in my museum."
+
+Our visitor staggered to his feet and clutched the mantelpiece
+with his right hand. Holmes unlocked his strong-box and held up
+the blue carbuncle, which shone out like a star, with a cold,
+brilliant, many-pointed radiance. Ryder stood glaring with a
+drawn face, uncertain whether to claim or to disown it.
+
+"The game's up, Ryder," said Holmes quietly. "Hold up, man, or
+you'll be into the fire! Give him an arm back into his chair,
+Watson. He's not got blood enough to go in for felony with
+impunity. Give him a dash of brandy. So! Now he looks a little
+more human. What a shrimp it is, to be sure!"
+
+For a moment he had staggered and nearly fallen, but the brandy
+brought a tinge of colour into his cheeks, and he sat staring
+with frightened eyes at his accuser.
+
+"I have almost every link in my hands, and all the proofs which I
+could possibly need, so there is little which you need tell me.
+Still, that little may as well be cleared up to make the case
+complete. You had heard, Ryder, of this blue stone of the
+Countess of Morcar's?"
+
+"It was Catherine Cusack who told me of it," said he in a
+crackling voice.
+
+"I see--her ladyship's waiting-maid. Well, the temptation of
+sudden wealth so easily acquired was too much for you, as it has
+been for better men before you; but you were not very scrupulous
+in the means you used. It seems to me, Ryder, that there is the
+making of a very pretty villain in you. You knew that this man
+Horner, the plumber, had been concerned in some such matter
+before, and that suspicion would rest the more readily upon him.
+What did you do, then? You made some small job in my lady's
+room--you and your confederate Cusack--and you managed that he
+should be the man sent for. Then, when he had left, you rifled
+the jewel-case, raised the alarm, and had this unfortunate man
+arrested. You then--"
+
+Ryder threw himself down suddenly upon the rug and clutched at my
+companion's knees. "For God's sake, have mercy!" he shrieked.
+"Think of my father! Of my mother! It would break their hearts. I
+never went wrong before! I never will again. I swear it. I'll
+swear it on a Bible. Oh, don't bring it into court! For Christ's
+sake, don't!"
+
+"Get back into your chair!" said Holmes sternly. "It is very well
+to cringe and crawl now, but you thought little enough of this
+poor Horner in the dock for a crime of which he knew nothing."
+
+"I will fly, Mr. Holmes. I will leave the country, sir. Then the
+charge against him will break down."
+
+"Hum! We will talk about that. And now let us hear a true account
+of the next act. How came the stone into the goose, and how came
+the goose into the open market? Tell us the truth, for there lies
+your only hope of safety."
+
+Ryder passed his tongue over his parched lips. "I will tell you
+it just as it happened, sir," said he. "When Horner had been
+arrested, it seemed to me that it would be best for me to get
+away with the stone at once, for I did not know at what moment
+the police might not take it into their heads to search me and my
+room. There was no place about the hotel where it would be safe.
+I went out, as if on some commission, and I made for my sister's
+house. She had married a man named Oakshott, and lived in Brixton
+Road, where she fattened fowls for the market. All the way there
+every man I met seemed to me to be a policeman or a detective;
+and, for all that it was a cold night, the sweat was pouring down
+my face before I came to the Brixton Road. My sister asked me
+what was the matter, and why I was so pale; but I told her that I
+had been upset by the jewel robbery at the hotel. Then I went
+into the back yard and smoked a pipe and wondered what it would
+be best to do.
+
+"I had a friend once called Maudsley, who went to the bad, and
+has just been serving his time in Pentonville. One day he had met
+me, and fell into talk about the ways of thieves, and how they
+could get rid of what they stole. I knew that he would be true to
+me, for I knew one or two things about him; so I made up my mind
+to go right on to Kilburn, where he lived, and take him into my
+confidence. He would show me how to turn the stone into money.
+But how to get to him in safety? I thought of the agonies I had
+gone through in coming from the hotel. I might at any moment be
+seized and searched, and there would be the stone in my waistcoat
+pocket. I was leaning against the wall at the time and looking at
+the geese which were waddling about round my feet, and suddenly
+an idea came into my head which showed me how I could beat the
+best detective that ever lived.
+
+"My sister had told me some weeks before that I might have the
+pick of her geese for a Christmas present, and I knew that she
+was always as good as her word. I would take my goose now, and in
+it I would carry my stone to Kilburn. There was a little shed in
+the yard, and behind this I drove one of the birds--a fine big
+one, white, with a barred tail. I caught it, and prying its bill
+open, I thrust the stone down its throat as far as my finger
+could reach. The bird gave a gulp, and I felt the stone pass
+along its gullet and down into its crop. But the creature flapped
+and struggled, and out came my sister to know what was the
+matter. As I turned to speak to her the brute broke loose and
+fluttered off among the others.
+
+"'Whatever were you doing with that bird, Jem?' says she.
+
+"'Well,' said I, 'you said you'd give me one for Christmas, and I
+was feeling which was the fattest.'
+
+"'Oh,' says she, 'we've set yours aside for you--Jem's bird, we
+call it. It's the big white one over yonder. There's twenty-six
+of them, which makes one for you, and one for us, and two dozen
+for the market.'
+
+"'Thank you, Maggie,' says I; 'but if it is all the same to you,
+I'd rather have that one I was handling just now.'
+
+"'The other is a good three pound heavier,' said she, 'and we
+fattened it expressly for you.'
+
+"'Never mind. I'll have the other, and I'll take it now,' said I.
+
+"'Oh, just as you like,' said she, a little huffed. 'Which is it
+you want, then?'
+
+"'That white one with the barred tail, right in the middle of the
+flock.'
+
+"'Oh, very well. Kill it and take it with you.'
+
+"Well, I did what she said, Mr. Holmes, and I carried the bird
+all the way to Kilburn. I told my pal what I had done, for he was
+a man that it was easy to tell a thing like that to. He laughed
+until he choked, and we got a knife and opened the goose. My
+heart turned to water, for there was no sign of the stone, and I
+knew that some terrible mistake had occurred. I left the bird,
+rushed back to my sister's, and hurried into the back yard. There
+was not a bird to be seen there.
+
+"'Where are they all, Maggie?' I cried.
+
+"'Gone to the dealer's, Jem.'
+
+"'Which dealer's?'
+
+"'Breckinridge, of Covent Garden.'
+
+"'But was there another with a barred tail?' I asked, 'the same
+as the one I chose?'
+
+"'Yes, Jem; there were two barred-tailed ones, and I could never
+tell them apart.'
+
+"Well, then, of course I saw it all, and I ran off as hard as my
+feet would carry me to this man Breckinridge; but he had sold the
+lot at once, and not one word would he tell me as to where they
+had gone. You heard him yourselves to-night. Well, he has always
+answered me like that. My sister thinks that I am going mad.
+Sometimes I think that I am myself. And now--and now I am myself
+a branded thief, without ever having touched the wealth for which
+I sold my character. God help me! God help me!" He burst into
+convulsive sobbing, with his face buried in his hands.
+
+There was a long silence, broken only by his heavy breathing and
+by the measured tapping of Sherlock Holmes' finger-tips upon the
+edge of the table. Then my friend rose and threw open the door.
+
+"Get out!" said he.
+
+"What, sir! Oh, Heaven bless you!"
+
+"No more words. Get out!"
+
+And no more words were needed. There was a rush, a clatter upon
+the stairs, the bang of a door, and the crisp rattle of running
+footfalls from the street.
+
+"After all, Watson," said Holmes, reaching up his hand for his
+clay pipe, "I am not retained by the police to supply their
+deficiencies. If Horner were in danger it would be another thing;
+but this fellow will not appear against him, and the case must
+collapse. I suppose that I am commuting a felony, but it is just
+possible that I am saving a soul. This fellow will not go wrong
+again; he is too terribly frightened. Send him to gaol now, and
+you make him a gaol-bird for life. Besides, it is the season of
+forgiveness. Chance has put in our way a most singular and
+whimsical problem, and its solution is its own reward. If you
+will have the goodness to touch the bell, Doctor, we will begin
+another investigation, in which, also a bird will be the chief
+feature."
+
+
+
+VIII. THE ADVENTURE OF THE SPECKLED BAND
+
+On glancing over my notes of the seventy odd cases in which I
+have during the last eight years studied the methods of my friend
+Sherlock Holmes, I find many tragic, some comic, a large number
+merely strange, but none commonplace; for, working as he did
+rather for the love of his art than for the acquirement of
+wealth, he refused to associate himself with any investigation
+which did not tend towards the unusual, and even the fantastic.
+Of all these varied cases, however, I cannot recall any which
+presented more singular features than that which was associated
+with the well-known Surrey family of the Roylotts of Stoke Moran.
+The events in question occurred in the early days of my
+association with Holmes, when we were sharing rooms as bachelors
+in Baker Street. It is possible that I might have placed them
+upon record before, but a promise of secrecy was made at the
+time, from which I have only been freed during the last month by
+the untimely death of the lady to whom the pledge was given. It
+is perhaps as well that the facts should now come to light, for I
+have reasons to know that there are widespread rumours as to the
+death of Dr. Grimesby Roylott which tend to make the matter even
+more terrible than the truth.
+
+It was early in April in the year '83 that I woke one morning to
+find Sherlock Holmes standing, fully dressed, by the side of my
+bed. He was a late riser, as a rule, and as the clock on the
+mantelpiece showed me that it was only a quarter-past seven, I
+blinked up at him in some surprise, and perhaps just a little
+resentment, for I was myself regular in my habits.
+
+"Very sorry to knock you up, Watson," said he, "but it's the
+common lot this morning. Mrs. Hudson has been knocked up, she
+retorted upon me, and I on you."
+
+"What is it, then--a fire?"
+
+"No; a client. It seems that a young lady has arrived in a
+considerable state of excitement, who insists upon seeing me. She
+is waiting now in the sitting-room. Now, when young ladies wander
+about the metropolis at this hour of the morning, and knock
+sleepy people up out of their beds, I presume that it is
+something very pressing which they have to communicate. Should it
+prove to be an interesting case, you would, I am sure, wish to
+follow it from the outset. I thought, at any rate, that I should
+call you and give you the chance."
+
+"My dear fellow, I would not miss it for anything."
+
+I had no keener pleasure than in following Holmes in his
+professional investigations, and in admiring the rapid
+deductions, as swift as intuitions, and yet always founded on a
+logical basis with which he unravelled the problems which were
+submitted to him. I rapidly threw on my clothes and was ready in
+a few minutes to accompany my friend down to the sitting-room. A
+lady dressed in black and heavily veiled, who had been sitting in
+the window, rose as we entered.
+
+"Good-morning, madam," said Holmes cheerily. "My name is Sherlock
+Holmes. This is my intimate friend and associate, Dr. Watson,
+before whom you can speak as freely as before myself. Ha! I am
+glad to see that Mrs. Hudson has had the good sense to light the
+fire. Pray draw up to it, and I shall order you a cup of hot
+coffee, for I observe that you are shivering."
+
+"It is not cold which makes me shiver," said the woman in a low
+voice, changing her seat as requested.
+
+"What, then?"
+
+"It is fear, Mr. Holmes. It is terror." She raised her veil as
+she spoke, and we could see that she was indeed in a pitiable
+state of agitation, her face all drawn and grey, with restless
+frightened eyes, like those of some hunted animal. Her features
+and figure were those of a woman of thirty, but her hair was shot
+with premature grey, and her expression was weary and haggard.
+Sherlock Holmes ran her over with one of his quick,
+all-comprehensive glances.
+
+"You must not fear," said he soothingly, bending forward and
+patting her forearm. "We shall soon set matters right, I have no
+doubt. You have come in by train this morning, I see."
+
+"You know me, then?"
+
+"No, but I observe the second half of a return ticket in the palm
+of your left glove. You must have started early, and yet you had
+a good drive in a dog-cart, along heavy roads, before you reached
+the station."
+
+The lady gave a violent start and stared in bewilderment at my
+companion.
+
+"There is no mystery, my dear madam," said he, smiling. "The left
+arm of your jacket is spattered with mud in no less than seven
+places. The marks are perfectly fresh. There is no vehicle save a
+dog-cart which throws up mud in that way, and then only when you
+sit on the left-hand side of the driver."
+
+"Whatever your reasons may be, you are perfectly correct," said
+she. "I started from home before six, reached Leatherhead at
+twenty past, and came in by the first train to Waterloo. Sir, I
+can stand this strain no longer; I shall go mad if it continues.
+I have no one to turn to--none, save only one, who cares for me,
+and he, poor fellow, can be of little aid. I have heard of you,
+Mr. Holmes; I have heard of you from Mrs. Farintosh, whom you
+helped in the hour of her sore need. It was from her that I had
+your address. Oh, sir, do you not think that you could help me,
+too, and at least throw a little light through the dense darkness
+which surrounds me? At present it is out of my power to reward
+you for your services, but in a month or six weeks I shall be
+married, with the control of my own income, and then at least you
+shall not find me ungrateful."
+
+Holmes turned to his desk and, unlocking it, drew out a small
+case-book, which he consulted.
+
+"Farintosh," said he. "Ah yes, I recall the case; it was
+concerned with an opal tiara. I think it was before your time,
+Watson. I can only say, madam, that I shall be happy to devote
+the same care to your case as I did to that of your friend. As to
+reward, my profession is its own reward; but you are at liberty
+to defray whatever expenses I may be put to, at the time which
+suits you best. And now I beg that you will lay before us
+everything that may help us in forming an opinion upon the
+matter."
+
+"Alas!" replied our visitor, "the very horror of my situation
+lies in the fact that my fears are so vague, and my suspicions
+depend so entirely upon small points, which might seem trivial to
+another, that even he to whom of all others I have a right to
+look for help and advice looks upon all that I tell him about it
+as the fancies of a nervous woman. He does not say so, but I can
+read it from his soothing answers and averted eyes. But I have
+heard, Mr. Holmes, that you can see deeply into the manifold
+wickedness of the human heart. You may advise me how to walk amid
+the dangers which encompass me."
+
+"I am all attention, madam."
+
+"My name is Helen Stoner, and I am living with my stepfather, who
+is the last survivor of one of the oldest Saxon families in
+England, the Roylotts of Stoke Moran, on the western border of
+Surrey."
+
+Holmes nodded his head. "The name is familiar to me," said he.
+
+"The family was at one time among the richest in England, and the
+estates extended over the borders into Berkshire in the north,
+and Hampshire in the west. In the last century, however, four
+successive heirs were of a dissolute and wasteful disposition,
+and the family ruin was eventually completed by a gambler in the
+days of the Regency. Nothing was left save a few acres of ground,
+and the two-hundred-year-old house, which is itself crushed under
+a heavy mortgage. The last squire dragged out his existence
+there, living the horrible life of an aristocratic pauper; but
+his only son, my stepfather, seeing that he must adapt himself to
+the new conditions, obtained an advance from a relative, which
+enabled him to take a medical degree and went out to Calcutta,
+where, by his professional skill and his force of character, he
+established a large practice. In a fit of anger, however, caused
+by some robberies which had been perpetrated in the house, he
+beat his native butler to death and narrowly escaped a capital
+sentence. As it was, he suffered a long term of imprisonment and
+afterwards returned to England a morose and disappointed man.
+
+"When Dr. Roylott was in India he married my mother, Mrs. Stoner,
+the young widow of Major-General Stoner, of the Bengal Artillery.
+My sister Julia and I were twins, and we were only two years old
+at the time of my mother's re-marriage. She had a considerable
+sum of money--not less than 1000 pounds a year--and this she
+bequeathed to Dr. Roylott entirely while we resided with him,
+with a provision that a certain annual sum should be allowed to
+each of us in the event of our marriage. Shortly after our return
+to England my mother died--she was killed eight years ago in a
+railway accident near Crewe. Dr. Roylott then abandoned his
+attempts to establish himself in practice in London and took us
+to live with him in the old ancestral house at Stoke Moran. The
+money which my mother had left was enough for all our wants, and
+there seemed to be no obstacle to our happiness.
+
+"But a terrible change came over our stepfather about this time.
+Instead of making friends and exchanging visits with our
+neighbours, who had at first been overjoyed to see a Roylott of
+Stoke Moran back in the old family seat, he shut himself up in
+his house and seldom came out save to indulge in ferocious
+quarrels with whoever might cross his path. Violence of temper
+approaching to mania has been hereditary in the men of the
+family, and in my stepfather's case it had, I believe, been
+intensified by his long residence in the tropics. A series of
+disgraceful brawls took place, two of which ended in the
+police-court, until at last he became the terror of the village,
+and the folks would fly at his approach, for he is a man of
+immense strength, and absolutely uncontrollable in his anger.
+
+"Last week he hurled the local blacksmith over a parapet into a
+stream, and it was only by paying over all the money which I
+could gather together that I was able to avert another public
+exposure. He had no friends at all save the wandering gipsies,
+and he would give these vagabonds leave to encamp upon the few
+acres of bramble-covered land which represent the family estate,
+and would accept in return the hospitality of their tents,
+wandering away with them sometimes for weeks on end. He has a
+passion also for Indian animals, which are sent over to him by a
+correspondent, and he has at this moment a cheetah and a baboon,
+which wander freely over his grounds and are feared by the
+villagers almost as much as their master.
+
+"You can imagine from what I say that my poor sister Julia and I
+had no great pleasure in our lives. No servant would stay with
+us, and for a long time we did all the work of the house. She was
+but thirty at the time of her death, and yet her hair had already
+begun to whiten, even as mine has."
+
+"Your sister is dead, then?"
+
+"She died just two years ago, and it is of her death that I wish
+to speak to you. You can understand that, living the life which I
+have described, we were little likely to see anyone of our own
+age and position. We had, however, an aunt, my mother's maiden
+sister, Miss Honoria Westphail, who lives near Harrow, and we
+were occasionally allowed to pay short visits at this lady's
+house. Julia went there at Christmas two years ago, and met there
+a half-pay major of marines, to whom she became engaged. My
+stepfather learned of the engagement when my sister returned and
+offered no objection to the marriage; but within a fortnight of
+the day which had been fixed for the wedding, the terrible event
+occurred which has deprived me of my only companion."
+
+Sherlock Holmes had been leaning back in his chair with his eyes
+closed and his head sunk in a cushion, but he half opened his
+lids now and glanced across at his visitor.
+
+"Pray be precise as to details," said he.
+
+"It is easy for me to be so, for every event of that dreadful
+time is seared into my memory. The manor-house is, as I have
+already said, very old, and only one wing is now inhabited. The
+bedrooms in this wing are on the ground floor, the sitting-rooms
+being in the central block of the buildings. Of these bedrooms
+the first is Dr. Roylott's, the second my sister's, and the third
+my own. There is no communication between them, but they all open
+out into the same corridor. Do I make myself plain?"
+
+"Perfectly so."
+
+"The windows of the three rooms open out upon the lawn. That
+fatal night Dr. Roylott had gone to his room early, though we
+knew that he had not retired to rest, for my sister was troubled
+by the smell of the strong Indian cigars which it was his custom
+to smoke. She left her room, therefore, and came into mine, where
+she sat for some time, chatting about her approaching wedding. At
+eleven o'clock she rose to leave me, but she paused at the door
+and looked back.
+
+"'Tell me, Helen,' said she, 'have you ever heard anyone whistle
+in the dead of the night?'
+
+"'Never,' said I.
+
+"'I suppose that you could not possibly whistle, yourself, in
+your sleep?'
+
+"'Certainly not. But why?'
+
+"'Because during the last few nights I have always, about three
+in the morning, heard a low, clear whistle. I am a light sleeper,
+and it has awakened me. I cannot tell where it came from--perhaps
+from the next room, perhaps from the lawn. I thought that I would
+just ask you whether you had heard it.'
+
+"'No, I have not. It must be those wretched gipsies in the
+plantation.'
+
+"'Very likely. And yet if it were on the lawn, I wonder that you
+did not hear it also.'
+
+"'Ah, but I sleep more heavily than you.'
+
+"'Well, it is of no great consequence, at any rate.' She smiled
+back at me, closed my door, and a few moments later I heard her
+key turn in the lock."
+
+"Indeed," said Holmes. "Was it your custom always to lock
+yourselves in at night?"
+
+"Always."
+
+"And why?"
+
+"I think that I mentioned to you that the doctor kept a cheetah
+and a baboon. We had no feeling of security unless our doors were
+locked."
+
+"Quite so. Pray proceed with your statement."
+
+"I could not sleep that night. A vague feeling of impending
+misfortune impressed me. My sister and I, you will recollect,
+were twins, and you know how subtle are the links which bind two
+souls which are so closely allied. It was a wild night. The wind
+was howling outside, and the rain was beating and splashing
+against the windows. Suddenly, amid all the hubbub of the gale,
+there burst forth the wild scream of a terrified woman. I knew
+that it was my sister's voice. I sprang from my bed, wrapped a
+shawl round me, and rushed into the corridor. As I opened my door
+I seemed to hear a low whistle, such as my sister described, and
+a few moments later a clanging sound, as if a mass of metal had
+fallen. As I ran down the passage, my sister's door was unlocked,
+and revolved slowly upon its hinges. I stared at it
+horror-stricken, not knowing what was about to issue from it. By
+the light of the corridor-lamp I saw my sister appear at the
+opening, her face blanched with terror, her hands groping for
+help, her whole figure swaying to and fro like that of a
+drunkard. I ran to her and threw my arms round her, but at that
+moment her knees seemed to give way and she fell to the ground.
+She writhed as one who is in terrible pain, and her limbs were
+dreadfully convulsed. At first I thought that she had not
+recognised me, but as I bent over her she suddenly shrieked out
+in a voice which I shall never forget, 'Oh, my God! Helen! It was
+the band! The speckled band!' There was something else which she
+would fain have said, and she stabbed with her finger into the
+air in the direction of the doctor's room, but a fresh convulsion
+seized her and choked her words. I rushed out, calling loudly for
+my stepfather, and I met him hastening from his room in his
+dressing-gown. When he reached my sister's side she was
+unconscious, and though he poured brandy down her throat and sent
+for medical aid from the village, all efforts were in vain, for
+she slowly sank and died without having recovered her
+consciousness. Such was the dreadful end of my beloved sister."
+
+"One moment," said Holmes, "are you sure about this whistle and
+metallic sound? Could you swear to it?"
+
+"That was what the county coroner asked me at the inquiry. It is
+my strong impression that I heard it, and yet, among the crash of
+the gale and the creaking of an old house, I may possibly have
+been deceived."
+
+"Was your sister dressed?"
+
+"No, she was in her night-dress. In her right hand was found the
+charred stump of a match, and in her left a match-box."
+
+"Showing that she had struck a light and looked about her when
+the alarm took place. That is important. And what conclusions did
+the coroner come to?"
+
+"He investigated the case with great care, for Dr. Roylott's
+conduct had long been notorious in the county, but he was unable
+to find any satisfactory cause of death. My evidence showed that
+the door had been fastened upon the inner side, and the windows
+were blocked by old-fashioned shutters with broad iron bars,
+which were secured every night. The walls were carefully sounded,
+and were shown to be quite solid all round, and the flooring was
+also thoroughly examined, with the same result. The chimney is
+wide, but is barred up by four large staples. It is certain,
+therefore, that my sister was quite alone when she met her end.
+Besides, there were no marks of any violence upon her."
+
+"How about poison?"
+
+"The doctors examined her for it, but without success."
+
+"What do you think that this unfortunate lady died of, then?"
+
+"It is my belief that she died of pure fear and nervous shock,
+though what it was that frightened her I cannot imagine."
+
+"Were there gipsies in the plantation at the time?"
+
+"Yes, there are nearly always some there."
+
+"Ah, and what did you gather from this allusion to a band--a
+speckled band?"
+
+"Sometimes I have thought that it was merely the wild talk of
+delirium, sometimes that it may have referred to some band of
+people, perhaps to these very gipsies in the plantation. I do not
+know whether the spotted handkerchiefs which so many of them wear
+over their heads might have suggested the strange adjective which
+she used."
+
+Holmes shook his head like a man who is far from being satisfied.
+
+"These are very deep waters," said he; "pray go on with your
+narrative."
+
+"Two years have passed since then, and my life has been until
+lately lonelier than ever. A month ago, however, a dear friend,
+whom I have known for many years, has done me the honour to ask
+my hand in marriage. His name is Armitage--Percy Armitage--the
+second son of Mr. Armitage, of Crane Water, near Reading. My
+stepfather has offered no opposition to the match, and we are to
+be married in the course of the spring. Two days ago some repairs
+were started in the west wing of the building, and my bedroom
+wall has been pierced, so that I have had to move into the
+chamber in which my sister died, and to sleep in the very bed in
+which she slept. Imagine, then, my thrill of terror when last
+night, as I lay awake, thinking over her terrible fate, I
+suddenly heard in the silence of the night the low whistle which
+had been the herald of her own death. I sprang up and lit the
+lamp, but nothing was to be seen in the room. I was too shaken to
+go to bed again, however, so I dressed, and as soon as it was
+daylight I slipped down, got a dog-cart at the Crown Inn, which
+is opposite, and drove to Leatherhead, from whence I have come on
+this morning with the one object of seeing you and asking your
+advice."
+
+"You have done wisely," said my friend. "But have you told me
+all?"
+
+"Yes, all."
+
+"Miss Roylott, you have not. You are screening your stepfather."
+
+"Why, what do you mean?"
+
+For answer Holmes pushed back the frill of black lace which
+fringed the hand that lay upon our visitor's knee. Five little
+livid spots, the marks of four fingers and a thumb, were printed
+upon the white wrist.
+
+"You have been cruelly used," said Holmes.
+
+The lady coloured deeply and covered over her injured wrist. "He
+is a hard man," she said, "and perhaps he hardly knows his own
+strength."
+
+There was a long silence, during which Holmes leaned his chin
+upon his hands and stared into the crackling fire.
+
+"This is a very deep business," he said at last. "There are a
+thousand details which I should desire to know before I decide
+upon our course of action. Yet we have not a moment to lose. If
+we were to come to Stoke Moran to-day, would it be possible for
+us to see over these rooms without the knowledge of your
+stepfather?"
+
+"As it happens, he spoke of coming into town to-day upon some
+most important business. It is probable that he will be away all
+day, and that there would be nothing to disturb you. We have a
+housekeeper now, but she is old and foolish, and I could easily
+get her out of the way."
+
+"Excellent. You are not averse to this trip, Watson?"
+
+"By no means."
+
+"Then we shall both come. What are you going to do yourself?"
+
+"I have one or two things which I would wish to do now that I am
+in town. But I shall return by the twelve o'clock train, so as to
+be there in time for your coming."
+
+"And you may expect us early in the afternoon. I have myself some
+small business matters to attend to. Will you not wait and
+breakfast?"
+
+"No, I must go. My heart is lightened already since I have
+confided my trouble to you. I shall look forward to seeing you
+again this afternoon." She dropped her thick black veil over her
+face and glided from the room.
+
+"And what do you think of it all, Watson?" asked Sherlock Holmes,
+leaning back in his chair.
+
+"It seems to me to be a most dark and sinister business."
+
+"Dark enough and sinister enough."
+
+"Yet if the lady is correct in saying that the flooring and walls
+are sound, and that the door, window, and chimney are impassable,
+then her sister must have been undoubtedly alone when she met her
+mysterious end."
+
+"What becomes, then, of these nocturnal whistles, and what of the
+very peculiar words of the dying woman?"
+
+"I cannot think."
+
+"When you combine the ideas of whistles at night, the presence of
+a band of gipsies who are on intimate terms with this old doctor,
+the fact that we have every reason to believe that the doctor has
+an interest in preventing his stepdaughter's marriage, the dying
+allusion to a band, and, finally, the fact that Miss Helen Stoner
+heard a metallic clang, which might have been caused by one of
+those metal bars that secured the shutters falling back into its
+place, I think that there is good ground to think that the
+mystery may be cleared along those lines."
+
+"But what, then, did the gipsies do?"
+
+"I cannot imagine."
+
+"I see many objections to any such theory."
+
+"And so do I. It is precisely for that reason that we are going
+to Stoke Moran this day. I want to see whether the objections are
+fatal, or if they may be explained away. But what in the name of
+the devil!"
+
+The ejaculation had been drawn from my companion by the fact that
+our door had been suddenly dashed open, and that a huge man had
+framed himself in the aperture. His costume was a peculiar
+mixture of the professional and of the agricultural, having a
+black top-hat, a long frock-coat, and a pair of high gaiters,
+with a hunting-crop swinging in his hand. So tall was he that his
+hat actually brushed the cross bar of the doorway, and his
+breadth seemed to span it across from side to side. A large face,
+seared with a thousand wrinkles, burned yellow with the sun, and
+marked with every evil passion, was turned from one to the other
+of us, while his deep-set, bile-shot eyes, and his high, thin,
+fleshless nose, gave him somewhat the resemblance to a fierce old
+bird of prey.
+
+"Which of you is Holmes?" asked this apparition.
+
+"My name, sir; but you have the advantage of me," said my
+companion quietly.
+
+"I am Dr. Grimesby Roylott, of Stoke Moran."
+
+"Indeed, Doctor," said Holmes blandly. "Pray take a seat."
+
+"I will do nothing of the kind. My stepdaughter has been here. I
+have traced her. What has she been saying to you?"
+
+"It is a little cold for the time of the year," said Holmes.
+
+"What has she been saying to you?" screamed the old man
+furiously.
+
+"But I have heard that the crocuses promise well," continued my
+companion imperturbably.
+
+"Ha! You put me off, do you?" said our new visitor, taking a step
+forward and shaking his hunting-crop. "I know you, you scoundrel!
+I have heard of you before. You are Holmes, the meddler."
+
+My friend smiled.
+
+"Holmes, the busybody!"
+
+His smile broadened.
+
+"Holmes, the Scotland Yard Jack-in-office!"
+
+Holmes chuckled heartily. "Your conversation is most
+entertaining," said he. "When you go out close the door, for
+there is a decided draught."
+
+"I will go when I have said my say. Don't you dare to meddle with
+my affairs. I know that Miss Stoner has been here. I traced her!
+I am a dangerous man to fall foul of! See here." He stepped
+swiftly forward, seized the poker, and bent it into a curve with
+his huge brown hands.
+
+"See that you keep yourself out of my grip," he snarled, and
+hurling the twisted poker into the fireplace he strode out of the
+room.
+
+"He seems a very amiable person," said Holmes, laughing. "I am
+not quite so bulky, but if he had remained I might have shown him
+that my grip was not much more feeble than his own." As he spoke
+he picked up the steel poker and, with a sudden effort,
+straightened it out again.
+
+"Fancy his having the insolence to confound me with the official
+detective force! This incident gives zest to our investigation,
+however, and I only trust that our little friend will not suffer
+from her imprudence in allowing this brute to trace her. And now,
+Watson, we shall order breakfast, and afterwards I shall walk
+down to Doctors' Commons, where I hope to get some data which may
+help us in this matter."
+
+
+It was nearly one o'clock when Sherlock Holmes returned from his
+excursion. He held in his hand a sheet of blue paper, scrawled
+over with notes and figures.
+
+"I have seen the will of the deceased wife," said he. "To
+determine its exact meaning I have been obliged to work out the
+present prices of the investments with which it is concerned. The
+total income, which at the time of the wife's death was little
+short of 1100 pounds, is now, through the fall in agricultural
+prices, not more than 750 pounds. Each daughter can claim an
+income of 250 pounds, in case of marriage. It is evident,
+therefore, that if both girls had married, this beauty would have
+had a mere pittance, while even one of them would cripple him to
+a very serious extent. My morning's work has not been wasted,
+since it has proved that he has the very strongest motives for
+standing in the way of anything of the sort. And now, Watson,
+this is too serious for dawdling, especially as the old man is
+aware that we are interesting ourselves in his affairs; so if you
+are ready, we shall call a cab and drive to Waterloo. I should be
+very much obliged if you would slip your revolver into your
+pocket. An Eley's No. 2 is an excellent argument with gentlemen
+who can twist steel pokers into knots. That and a tooth-brush
+are, I think, all that we need."
+
+At Waterloo we were fortunate in catching a train for
+Leatherhead, where we hired a trap at the station inn and drove
+for four or five miles through the lovely Surrey lanes. It was a
+perfect day, with a bright sun and a few fleecy clouds in the
+heavens. The trees and wayside hedges were just throwing out
+their first green shoots, and the air was full of the pleasant
+smell of the moist earth. To me at least there was a strange
+contrast between the sweet promise of the spring and this
+sinister quest upon which we were engaged. My companion sat in
+the front of the trap, his arms folded, his hat pulled down over
+his eyes, and his chin sunk upon his breast, buried in the
+deepest thought. Suddenly, however, he started, tapped me on the
+shoulder, and pointed over the meadows.
+
+"Look there!" said he.
+
+A heavily timbered park stretched up in a gentle slope,
+thickening into a grove at the highest point. From amid the
+branches there jutted out the grey gables and high roof-tree of a
+very old mansion.
+
+"Stoke Moran?" said he.
+
+"Yes, sir, that be the house of Dr. Grimesby Roylott," remarked
+the driver.
+
+"There is some building going on there," said Holmes; "that is
+where we are going."
+
+"There's the village," said the driver, pointing to a cluster of
+roofs some distance to the left; "but if you want to get to the
+house, you'll find it shorter to get over this stile, and so by
+the foot-path over the fields. There it is, where the lady is
+walking."
+
+"And the lady, I fancy, is Miss Stoner," observed Holmes, shading
+his eyes. "Yes, I think we had better do as you suggest."
+
+We got off, paid our fare, and the trap rattled back on its way
+to Leatherhead.
+
+"I thought it as well," said Holmes as we climbed the stile,
+"that this fellow should think we had come here as architects, or
+on some definite business. It may stop his gossip.
+Good-afternoon, Miss Stoner. You see that we have been as good as
+our word."
+
+Our client of the morning had hurried forward to meet us with a
+face which spoke her joy. "I have been waiting so eagerly for
+you," she cried, shaking hands with us warmly. "All has turned
+out splendidly. Dr. Roylott has gone to town, and it is unlikely
+that he will be back before evening."
+
+"We have had the pleasure of making the doctor's acquaintance,"
+said Holmes, and in a few words he sketched out what had
+occurred. Miss Stoner turned white to the lips as she listened.
+
+"Good heavens!" she cried, "he has followed me, then."
+
+"So it appears."
+
+"He is so cunning that I never know when I am safe from him. What
+will he say when he returns?"
+
+"He must guard himself, for he may find that there is someone
+more cunning than himself upon his track. You must lock yourself
+up from him to-night. If he is violent, we shall take you away to
+your aunt's at Harrow. Now, we must make the best use of our
+time, so kindly take us at once to the rooms which we are to
+examine."
+
+The building was of grey, lichen-blotched stone, with a high
+central portion and two curving wings, like the claws of a crab,
+thrown out on each side. In one of these wings the windows were
+broken and blocked with wooden boards, while the roof was partly
+caved in, a picture of ruin. The central portion was in little
+better repair, but the right-hand block was comparatively modern,
+and the blinds in the windows, with the blue smoke curling up
+from the chimneys, showed that this was where the family resided.
+Some scaffolding had been erected against the end wall, and the
+stone-work had been broken into, but there were no signs of any
+workmen at the moment of our visit. Holmes walked slowly up and
+down the ill-trimmed lawn and examined with deep attention the
+outsides of the windows.
+
+"This, I take it, belongs to the room in which you used to sleep,
+the centre one to your sister's, and the one next to the main
+building to Dr. Roylott's chamber?"
+
+"Exactly so. But I am now sleeping in the middle one."
+
+"Pending the alterations, as I understand. By the way, there does
+not seem to be any very pressing need for repairs at that end
+wall."
+
+"There were none. I believe that it was an excuse to move me from
+my room."
+
+"Ah! that is suggestive. Now, on the other side of this narrow
+wing runs the corridor from which these three rooms open. There
+are windows in it, of course?"
+
+"Yes, but very small ones. Too narrow for anyone to pass
+through."
+
+"As you both locked your doors at night, your rooms were
+unapproachable from that side. Now, would you have the kindness
+to go into your room and bar your shutters?"
+
+Miss Stoner did so, and Holmes, after a careful examination
+through the open window, endeavoured in every way to force the
+shutter open, but without success. There was no slit through
+which a knife could be passed to raise the bar. Then with his
+lens he tested the hinges, but they were of solid iron, built
+firmly into the massive masonry. "Hum!" said he, scratching his
+chin in some perplexity, "my theory certainly presents some
+difficulties. No one could pass these shutters if they were
+bolted. Well, we shall see if the inside throws any light upon
+the matter."
+
+A small side door led into the whitewashed corridor from which
+the three bedrooms opened. Holmes refused to examine the third
+chamber, so we passed at once to the second, that in which Miss
+Stoner was now sleeping, and in which her sister had met with her
+fate. It was a homely little room, with a low ceiling and a
+gaping fireplace, after the fashion of old country-houses. A
+brown chest of drawers stood in one corner, a narrow
+white-counterpaned bed in another, and a dressing-table on the
+left-hand side of the window. These articles, with two small
+wicker-work chairs, made up all the furniture in the room save
+for a square of Wilton carpet in the centre. The boards round and
+the panelling of the walls were of brown, worm-eaten oak, so old
+and discoloured that it may have dated from the original building
+of the house. Holmes drew one of the chairs into a corner and sat
+silent, while his eyes travelled round and round and up and down,
+taking in every detail of the apartment.
+
+"Where does that bell communicate with?" he asked at last
+pointing to a thick bell-rope which hung down beside the bed, the
+tassel actually lying upon the pillow.
+
+"It goes to the housekeeper's room."
+
+"It looks newer than the other things?"
+
+"Yes, it was only put there a couple of years ago."
+
+"Your sister asked for it, I suppose?"
+
+"No, I never heard of her using it. We used always to get what we
+wanted for ourselves."
+
+"Indeed, it seemed unnecessary to put so nice a bell-pull there.
+You will excuse me for a few minutes while I satisfy myself as to
+this floor." He threw himself down upon his face with his lens in
+his hand and crawled swiftly backward and forward, examining
+minutely the cracks between the boards. Then he did the same with
+the wood-work with which the chamber was panelled. Finally he
+walked over to the bed and spent some time in staring at it and
+in running his eye up and down the wall. Finally he took the
+bell-rope in his hand and gave it a brisk tug.
+
+"Why, it's a dummy," said he.
+
+"Won't it ring?"
+
+"No, it is not even attached to a wire. This is very interesting.
+You can see now that it is fastened to a hook just above where
+the little opening for the ventilator is."
+
+"How very absurd! I never noticed that before."
+
+"Very strange!" muttered Holmes, pulling at the rope. "There are
+one or two very singular points about this room. For example,
+what a fool a builder must be to open a ventilator into another
+room, when, with the same trouble, he might have communicated
+with the outside air!"
+
+"That is also quite modern," said the lady.
+
+"Done about the same time as the bell-rope?" remarked Holmes.
+
+"Yes, there were several little changes carried out about that
+time."
+
+"They seem to have been of a most interesting character--dummy
+bell-ropes, and ventilators which do not ventilate. With your
+permission, Miss Stoner, we shall now carry our researches into
+the inner apartment."
+
+Dr. Grimesby Roylott's chamber was larger than that of his
+step-daughter, but was as plainly furnished. A camp-bed, a small
+wooden shelf full of books, mostly of a technical character, an
+armchair beside the bed, a plain wooden chair against the wall, a
+round table, and a large iron safe were the principal things
+which met the eye. Holmes walked slowly round and examined each
+and all of them with the keenest interest.
+
+"What's in here?" he asked, tapping the safe.
+
+"My stepfather's business papers."
+
+"Oh! you have seen inside, then?"
+
+"Only once, some years ago. I remember that it was full of
+papers."
+
+"There isn't a cat in it, for example?"
+
+"No. What a strange idea!"
+
+"Well, look at this!" He took up a small saucer of milk which
+stood on the top of it.
+
+"No; we don't keep a cat. But there is a cheetah and a baboon."
+
+"Ah, yes, of course! Well, a cheetah is just a big cat, and yet a
+saucer of milk does not go very far in satisfying its wants, I
+daresay. There is one point which I should wish to determine." He
+squatted down in front of the wooden chair and examined the seat
+of it with the greatest attention.
+
+"Thank you. That is quite settled," said he, rising and putting
+his lens in his pocket. "Hullo! Here is something interesting!"
+
+The object which had caught his eye was a small dog lash hung on
+one corner of the bed. The lash, however, was curled upon itself
+and tied so as to make a loop of whipcord.
+
+"What do you make of that, Watson?"
+
+"It's a common enough lash. But I don't know why it should be
+tied."
+
+"That is not quite so common, is it? Ah, me! it's a wicked world,
+and when a clever man turns his brains to crime it is the worst
+of all. I think that I have seen enough now, Miss Stoner, and
+with your permission we shall walk out upon the lawn."
+
+I had never seen my friend's face so grim or his brow so dark as
+it was when we turned from the scene of this investigation. We
+had walked several times up and down the lawn, neither Miss
+Stoner nor myself liking to break in upon his thoughts before he
+roused himself from his reverie.
+
+"It is very essential, Miss Stoner," said he, "that you should
+absolutely follow my advice in every respect."
+
+"I shall most certainly do so."
+
+"The matter is too serious for any hesitation. Your life may
+depend upon your compliance."
+
+"I assure you that I am in your hands."
+
+"In the first place, both my friend and I must spend the night in
+your room."
+
+Both Miss Stoner and I gazed at him in astonishment.
+
+"Yes, it must be so. Let me explain. I believe that that is the
+village inn over there?"
+
+"Yes, that is the Crown."
+
+"Very good. Your windows would be visible from there?"
+
+"Certainly."
+
+"You must confine yourself to your room, on pretence of a
+headache, when your stepfather comes back. Then when you hear him
+retire for the night, you must open the shutters of your window,
+undo the hasp, put your lamp there as a signal to us, and then
+withdraw quietly with everything which you are likely to want
+into the room which you used to occupy. I have no doubt that, in
+spite of the repairs, you could manage there for one night."
+
+"Oh, yes, easily."
+
+"The rest you will leave in our hands."
+
+"But what will you do?"
+
+"We shall spend the night in your room, and we shall investigate
+the cause of this noise which has disturbed you."
+
+"I believe, Mr. Holmes, that you have already made up your mind,"
+said Miss Stoner, laying her hand upon my companion's sleeve.
+
+"Perhaps I have."
+
+"Then, for pity's sake, tell me what was the cause of my sister's
+death."
+
+"I should prefer to have clearer proofs before I speak."
+
+"You can at least tell me whether my own thought is correct, and
+if she died from some sudden fright."
+
+"No, I do not think so. I think that there was probably some more
+tangible cause. And now, Miss Stoner, we must leave you for if
+Dr. Roylott returned and saw us our journey would be in vain.
+Good-bye, and be brave, for if you will do what I have told you,
+you may rest assured that we shall soon drive away the dangers
+that threaten you."
+
+Sherlock Holmes and I had no difficulty in engaging a bedroom and
+sitting-room at the Crown Inn. They were on the upper floor, and
+from our window we could command a view of the avenue gate, and
+of the inhabited wing of Stoke Moran Manor House. At dusk we saw
+Dr. Grimesby Roylott drive past, his huge form looming up beside
+the little figure of the lad who drove him. The boy had some
+slight difficulty in undoing the heavy iron gates, and we heard
+the hoarse roar of the doctor's voice and saw the fury with which
+he shook his clinched fists at him. The trap drove on, and a few
+minutes later we saw a sudden light spring up among the trees as
+the lamp was lit in one of the sitting-rooms.
+
+"Do you know, Watson," said Holmes as we sat together in the
+gathering darkness, "I have really some scruples as to taking you
+to-night. There is a distinct element of danger."
+
+"Can I be of assistance?"
+
+"Your presence might be invaluable."
+
+"Then I shall certainly come."
+
+"It is very kind of you."
+
+"You speak of danger. You have evidently seen more in these rooms
+than was visible to me."
+
+"No, but I fancy that I may have deduced a little more. I imagine
+that you saw all that I did."
+
+"I saw nothing remarkable save the bell-rope, and what purpose
+that could answer I confess is more than I can imagine."
+
+"You saw the ventilator, too?"
+
+"Yes, but I do not think that it is such a very unusual thing to
+have a small opening between two rooms. It was so small that a
+rat could hardly pass through."
+
+"I knew that we should find a ventilator before ever we came to
+Stoke Moran."
+
+"My dear Holmes!"
+
+"Oh, yes, I did. You remember in her statement she said that her
+sister could smell Dr. Roylott's cigar. Now, of course that
+suggested at once that there must be a communication between the
+two rooms. It could only be a small one, or it would have been
+remarked upon at the coroner's inquiry. I deduced a ventilator."
+
+"But what harm can there be in that?"
+
+"Well, there is at least a curious coincidence of dates. A
+ventilator is made, a cord is hung, and a lady who sleeps in the
+bed dies. Does not that strike you?"
+
+"I cannot as yet see any connection."
+
+"Did you observe anything very peculiar about that bed?"
+
+"No."
+
+"It was clamped to the floor. Did you ever see a bed fastened
+like that before?"
+
+"I cannot say that I have."
+
+"The lady could not move her bed. It must always be in the same
+relative position to the ventilator and to the rope--or so we may
+call it, since it was clearly never meant for a bell-pull."
+
+"Holmes," I cried, "I seem to see dimly what you are hinting at.
+We are only just in time to prevent some subtle and horrible
+crime."
+
+"Subtle enough and horrible enough. When a doctor does go wrong
+he is the first of criminals. He has nerve and he has knowledge.
+Palmer and Pritchard were among the heads of their profession.
+This man strikes even deeper, but I think, Watson, that we shall
+be able to strike deeper still. But we shall have horrors enough
+before the night is over; for goodness' sake let us have a quiet
+pipe and turn our minds for a few hours to something more
+cheerful."
+
+
+About nine o'clock the light among the trees was extinguished,
+and all was dark in the direction of the Manor House. Two hours
+passed slowly away, and then, suddenly, just at the stroke of
+eleven, a single bright light shone out right in front of us.
+
+"That is our signal," said Holmes, springing to his feet; "it
+comes from the middle window."
+
+As we passed out he exchanged a few words with the landlord,
+explaining that we were going on a late visit to an acquaintance,
+and that it was possible that we might spend the night there. A
+moment later we were out on the dark road, a chill wind blowing
+in our faces, and one yellow light twinkling in front of us
+through the gloom to guide us on our sombre errand.
+
+There was little difficulty in entering the grounds, for
+unrepaired breaches gaped in the old park wall. Making our way
+among the trees, we reached the lawn, crossed it, and were about
+to enter through the window when out from a clump of laurel
+bushes there darted what seemed to be a hideous and distorted
+child, who threw itself upon the grass with writhing limbs and
+then ran swiftly across the lawn into the darkness.
+
+"My God!" I whispered; "did you see it?"
+
+Holmes was for the moment as startled as I. His hand closed like
+a vice upon my wrist in his agitation. Then he broke into a low
+laugh and put his lips to my ear.
+
+"It is a nice household," he murmured. "That is the baboon."
+
+I had forgotten the strange pets which the doctor affected. There
+was a cheetah, too; perhaps we might find it upon our shoulders
+at any moment. I confess that I felt easier in my mind when,
+after following Holmes' example and slipping off my shoes, I
+found myself inside the bedroom. My companion noiselessly closed
+the shutters, moved the lamp onto the table, and cast his eyes
+round the room. All was as we had seen it in the daytime. Then
+creeping up to me and making a trumpet of his hand, he whispered
+into my ear again so gently that it was all that I could do to
+distinguish the words:
+
+"The least sound would be fatal to our plans."
+
+I nodded to show that I had heard.
+
+"We must sit without light. He would see it through the
+ventilator."
+
+I nodded again.
+
+"Do not go asleep; your very life may depend upon it. Have your
+pistol ready in case we should need it. I will sit on the side of
+the bed, and you in that chair."
+
+I took out my revolver and laid it on the corner of the table.
+
+Holmes had brought up a long thin cane, and this he placed upon
+the bed beside him. By it he laid the box of matches and the
+stump of a candle. Then he turned down the lamp, and we were left
+in darkness.
+
+How shall I ever forget that dreadful vigil? I could not hear a
+sound, not even the drawing of a breath, and yet I knew that my
+companion sat open-eyed, within a few feet of me, in the same
+state of nervous tension in which I was myself. The shutters cut
+off the least ray of light, and we waited in absolute darkness.
+
+From outside came the occasional cry of a night-bird, and once at
+our very window a long drawn catlike whine, which told us that
+the cheetah was indeed at liberty. Far away we could hear the
+deep tones of the parish clock, which boomed out every quarter of
+an hour. How long they seemed, those quarters! Twelve struck, and
+one and two and three, and still we sat waiting silently for
+whatever might befall.
+
+Suddenly there was the momentary gleam of a light up in the
+direction of the ventilator, which vanished immediately, but was
+succeeded by a strong smell of burning oil and heated metal.
+Someone in the next room had lit a dark-lantern. I heard a gentle
+sound of movement, and then all was silent once more, though the
+smell grew stronger. For half an hour I sat with straining ears.
+Then suddenly another sound became audible--a very gentle,
+soothing sound, like that of a small jet of steam escaping
+continually from a kettle. The instant that we heard it, Holmes
+sprang from the bed, struck a match, and lashed furiously with
+his cane at the bell-pull.
+
+"You see it, Watson?" he yelled. "You see it?"
+
+But I saw nothing. At the moment when Holmes struck the light I
+heard a low, clear whistle, but the sudden glare flashing into my
+weary eyes made it impossible for me to tell what it was at which
+my friend lashed so savagely. I could, however, see that his face
+was deadly pale and filled with horror and loathing. He had
+ceased to strike and was gazing up at the ventilator when
+suddenly there broke from the silence of the night the most
+horrible cry to which I have ever listened. It swelled up louder
+and louder, a hoarse yell of pain and fear and anger all mingled
+in the one dreadful shriek. They say that away down in the
+village, and even in the distant parsonage, that cry raised the
+sleepers from their beds. It struck cold to our hearts, and I
+stood gazing at Holmes, and he at me, until the last echoes of it
+had died away into the silence from which it rose.
+
+"What can it mean?" I gasped.
+
+"It means that it is all over," Holmes answered. "And perhaps,
+after all, it is for the best. Take your pistol, and we will
+enter Dr. Roylott's room."
+
+With a grave face he lit the lamp and led the way down the
+corridor. Twice he struck at the chamber door without any reply
+from within. Then he turned the handle and entered, I at his
+heels, with the cocked pistol in my hand.
+
+It was a singular sight which met our eyes. On the table stood a
+dark-lantern with the shutter half open, throwing a brilliant
+beam of light upon the iron safe, the door of which was ajar.
+Beside this table, on the wooden chair, sat Dr. Grimesby Roylott
+clad in a long grey dressing-gown, his bare ankles protruding
+beneath, and his feet thrust into red heelless Turkish slippers.
+Across his lap lay the short stock with the long lash which we
+had noticed during the day. His chin was cocked upward and his
+eyes were fixed in a dreadful, rigid stare at the corner of the
+ceiling. Round his brow he had a peculiar yellow band, with
+brownish speckles, which seemed to be bound tightly round his
+head. As we entered he made neither sound nor motion.
+
+"The band! the speckled band!" whispered Holmes.
+
+I took a step forward. In an instant his strange headgear began
+to move, and there reared itself from among his hair the squat
+diamond-shaped head and puffed neck of a loathsome serpent.
+
+"It is a swamp adder!" cried Holmes; "the deadliest snake in
+India. He has died within ten seconds of being bitten. Violence
+does, in truth, recoil upon the violent, and the schemer falls
+into the pit which he digs for another. Let us thrust this
+creature back into its den, and we can then remove Miss Stoner to
+some place of shelter and let the county police know what has
+happened."
+
+As he spoke he drew the dog-whip swiftly from the dead man's lap,
+and throwing the noose round the reptile's neck he drew it from
+its horrid perch and, carrying it at arm's length, threw it into
+the iron safe, which he closed upon it.
+
+Such are the true facts of the death of Dr. Grimesby Roylott, of
+Stoke Moran. It is not necessary that I should prolong a
+narrative which has already run to too great a length by telling
+how we broke the sad news to the terrified girl, how we conveyed
+her by the morning train to the care of her good aunt at Harrow,
+of how the slow process of official inquiry came to the
+conclusion that the doctor met his fate while indiscreetly
+playing with a dangerous pet. The little which I had yet to learn
+of the case was told me by Sherlock Holmes as we travelled back
+next day.
+
+"I had," said he, "come to an entirely erroneous conclusion which
+shows, my dear Watson, how dangerous it always is to reason from
+insufficient data. The presence of the gipsies, and the use of
+the word 'band,' which was used by the poor girl, no doubt, to
+explain the appearance which she had caught a hurried glimpse of
+by the light of her match, were sufficient to put me upon an
+entirely wrong scent. I can only claim the merit that I instantly
+reconsidered my position when, however, it became clear to me
+that whatever danger threatened an occupant of the room could not
+come either from the window or the door. My attention was
+speedily drawn, as I have already remarked to you, to this
+ventilator, and to the bell-rope which hung down to the bed. The
+discovery that this was a dummy, and that the bed was clamped to
+the floor, instantly gave rise to the suspicion that the rope was
+there as a bridge for something passing through the hole and
+coming to the bed. The idea of a snake instantly occurred to me,
+and when I coupled it with my knowledge that the doctor was
+furnished with a supply of creatures from India, I felt that I
+was probably on the right track. The idea of using a form of
+poison which could not possibly be discovered by any chemical
+test was just such a one as would occur to a clever and ruthless
+man who had had an Eastern training. The rapidity with which such
+a poison would take effect would also, from his point of view, be
+an advantage. It would be a sharp-eyed coroner, indeed, who could
+distinguish the two little dark punctures which would show where
+the poison fangs had done their work. Then I thought of the
+whistle. Of course he must recall the snake before the morning
+light revealed it to the victim. He had trained it, probably by
+the use of the milk which we saw, to return to him when summoned.
+He would put it through this ventilator at the hour that he
+thought best, with the certainty that it would crawl down the
+rope and land on the bed. It might or might not bite the
+occupant, perhaps she might escape every night for a week, but
+sooner or later she must fall a victim.
+
+"I had come to these conclusions before ever I had entered his
+room. An inspection of his chair showed me that he had been in
+the habit of standing on it, which of course would be necessary
+in order that he should reach the ventilator. The sight of the
+safe, the saucer of milk, and the loop of whipcord were enough to
+finally dispel any doubts which may have remained. The metallic
+clang heard by Miss Stoner was obviously caused by her stepfather
+hastily closing the door of his safe upon its terrible occupant.
+Having once made up my mind, you know the steps which I took in
+order to put the matter to the proof. I heard the creature hiss
+as I have no doubt that you did also, and I instantly lit the
+light and attacked it."
+
+"With the result of driving it through the ventilator."
+
+"And also with the result of causing it to turn upon its master
+at the other side. Some of the blows of my cane came home and
+roused its snakish temper, so that it flew upon the first person
+it saw. In this way I am no doubt indirectly responsible for Dr.
+Grimesby Roylott's death, and I cannot say that it is likely to
+weigh very heavily upon my conscience."
+
+
+
+IX. THE ADVENTURE OF THE ENGINEER'S THUMB
+
+Of all the problems which have been submitted to my friend, Mr.
+Sherlock Holmes, for solution during the years of our intimacy,
+there were only two which I was the means of introducing to his
+notice--that of Mr. Hatherley's thumb, and that of Colonel
+Warburton's madness. Of these the latter may have afforded a
+finer field for an acute and original observer, but the other was
+so strange in its inception and so dramatic in its details that
+it may be the more worthy of being placed upon record, even if it
+gave my friend fewer openings for those deductive methods of
+reasoning by which he achieved such remarkable results. The story
+has, I believe, been told more than once in the newspapers, but,
+like all such narratives, its effect is much less striking when
+set forth en bloc in a single half-column of print than when the
+facts slowly evolve before your own eyes, and the mystery clears
+gradually away as each new discovery furnishes a step which leads
+on to the complete truth. At the time the circumstances made a
+deep impression upon me, and the lapse of two years has hardly
+served to weaken the effect.
+
+It was in the summer of '89, not long after my marriage, that the
+events occurred which I am now about to summarise. I had returned
+to civil practice and had finally abandoned Holmes in his Baker
+Street rooms, although I continually visited him and occasionally
+even persuaded him to forgo his Bohemian habits so far as to come
+and visit us. My practice had steadily increased, and as I
+happened to live at no very great distance from Paddington
+Station, I got a few patients from among the officials. One of
+these, whom I had cured of a painful and lingering disease, was
+never weary of advertising my virtues and of endeavouring to send
+me on every sufferer over whom he might have any influence.
+
+One morning, at a little before seven o'clock, I was awakened by
+the maid tapping at the door to announce that two men had come
+from Paddington and were waiting in the consulting-room. I
+dressed hurriedly, for I knew by experience that railway cases
+were seldom trivial, and hastened downstairs. As I descended, my
+old ally, the guard, came out of the room and closed the door
+tightly behind him.
+
+"I've got him here," he whispered, jerking his thumb over his
+shoulder; "he's all right."
+
+"What is it, then?" I asked, for his manner suggested that it was
+some strange creature which he had caged up in my room.
+
+"It's a new patient," he whispered. "I thought I'd bring him
+round myself; then he couldn't slip away. There he is, all safe
+and sound. I must go now, Doctor; I have my dooties, just the
+same as you." And off he went, this trusty tout, without even
+giving me time to thank him.
+
+I entered my consulting-room and found a gentleman seated by the
+table. He was quietly dressed in a suit of heather tweed with a
+soft cloth cap which he had laid down upon my books. Round one of
+his hands he had a handkerchief wrapped, which was mottled all
+over with bloodstains. He was young, not more than
+five-and-twenty, I should say, with a strong, masculine face; but
+he was exceedingly pale and gave me the impression of a man who
+was suffering from some strong agitation, which it took all his
+strength of mind to control.
+
+"I am sorry to knock you up so early, Doctor," said he, "but I
+have had a very serious accident during the night. I came in by
+train this morning, and on inquiring at Paddington as to where I
+might find a doctor, a worthy fellow very kindly escorted me
+here. I gave the maid a card, but I see that she has left it upon
+the side-table."
+
+I took it up and glanced at it. "Mr. Victor Hatherley, hydraulic
+engineer, 16A, Victoria Street (3rd floor)." That was the name,
+style, and abode of my morning visitor. "I regret that I have
+kept you waiting," said I, sitting down in my library-chair. "You
+are fresh from a night journey, I understand, which is in itself
+a monotonous occupation."
+
+"Oh, my night could not be called monotonous," said he, and
+laughed. He laughed very heartily, with a high, ringing note,
+leaning back in his chair and shaking his sides. All my medical
+instincts rose up against that laugh.
+
+"Stop it!" I cried; "pull yourself together!" and I poured out
+some water from a caraffe.
+
+It was useless, however. He was off in one of those hysterical
+outbursts which come upon a strong nature when some great crisis
+is over and gone. Presently he came to himself once more, very
+weary and pale-looking.
+
+"I have been making a fool of myself," he gasped.
+
+"Not at all. Drink this." I dashed some brandy into the water,
+and the colour began to come back to his bloodless cheeks.
+
+"That's better!" said he. "And now, Doctor, perhaps you would
+kindly attend to my thumb, or rather to the place where my thumb
+used to be."
+
+He unwound the handkerchief and held out his hand. It gave even
+my hardened nerves a shudder to look at it. There were four
+protruding fingers and a horrid red, spongy surface where the
+thumb should have been. It had been hacked or torn right out from
+the roots.
+
+"Good heavens!" I cried, "this is a terrible injury. It must have
+bled considerably."
+
+"Yes, it did. I fainted when it was done, and I think that I must
+have been senseless for a long time. When I came to I found that
+it was still bleeding, so I tied one end of my handkerchief very
+tightly round the wrist and braced it up with a twig."
+
+"Excellent! You should have been a surgeon."
+
+"It is a question of hydraulics, you see, and came within my own
+province."
+
+"This has been done," said I, examining the wound, "by a very
+heavy and sharp instrument."
+
+"A thing like a cleaver," said he.
+
+"An accident, I presume?"
+
+"By no means."
+
+"What! a murderous attack?"
+
+"Very murderous indeed."
+
+"You horrify me."
+
+I sponged the wound, cleaned it, dressed it, and finally covered
+it over with cotton wadding and carbolised bandages. He lay back
+without wincing, though he bit his lip from time to time.
+
+"How is that?" I asked when I had finished.
+
+"Capital! Between your brandy and your bandage, I feel a new man.
+I was very weak, but I have had a good deal to go through."
+
+"Perhaps you had better not speak of the matter. It is evidently
+trying to your nerves."
+
+"Oh, no, not now. I shall have to tell my tale to the police;
+but, between ourselves, if it were not for the convincing
+evidence of this wound of mine, I should be surprised if they
+believed my statement, for it is a very extraordinary one, and I
+have not much in the way of proof with which to back it up; and,
+even if they believe me, the clues which I can give them are so
+vague that it is a question whether justice will be done."
+
+"Ha!" cried I, "if it is anything in the nature of a problem
+which you desire to see solved, I should strongly recommend you
+to come to my friend, Mr. Sherlock Holmes, before you go to the
+official police."
+
+"Oh, I have heard of that fellow," answered my visitor, "and I
+should be very glad if he would take the matter up, though of
+course I must use the official police as well. Would you give me
+an introduction to him?"
+
+"I'll do better. I'll take you round to him myself."
+
+"I should be immensely obliged to you."
+
+"We'll call a cab and go together. We shall just be in time to
+have a little breakfast with him. Do you feel equal to it?"
+
+"Yes; I shall not feel easy until I have told my story."
+
+"Then my servant will call a cab, and I shall be with you in an
+instant." I rushed upstairs, explained the matter shortly to my
+wife, and in five minutes was inside a hansom, driving with my
+new acquaintance to Baker Street.
+
+Sherlock Holmes was, as I expected, lounging about his
+sitting-room in his dressing-gown, reading the agony column of The
+Times and smoking his before-breakfast pipe, which was composed
+of all the plugs and dottles left from his smokes of the day
+before, all carefully dried and collected on the corner of the
+mantelpiece. He received us in his quietly genial fashion,
+ordered fresh rashers and eggs, and joined us in a hearty meal.
+When it was concluded he settled our new acquaintance upon the
+sofa, placed a pillow beneath his head, and laid a glass of
+brandy and water within his reach.
+
+"It is easy to see that your experience has been no common one,
+Mr. Hatherley," said he. "Pray, lie down there and make yourself
+absolutely at home. Tell us what you can, but stop when you are
+tired and keep up your strength with a little stimulant."
+
+"Thank you," said my patient, "but I have felt another man since
+the doctor bandaged me, and I think that your breakfast has
+completed the cure. I shall take up as little of your valuable
+time as possible, so I shall start at once upon my peculiar
+experiences."
+
+Holmes sat in his big armchair with the weary, heavy-lidded
+expression which veiled his keen and eager nature, while I sat
+opposite to him, and we listened in silence to the strange story
+which our visitor detailed to us.
+
+"You must know," said he, "that I am an orphan and a bachelor,
+residing alone in lodgings in London. By profession I am a
+hydraulic engineer, and I have had considerable experience of my
+work during the seven years that I was apprenticed to Venner &
+Matheson, the well-known firm, of Greenwich. Two years ago,
+having served my time, and having also come into a fair sum of
+money through my poor father's death, I determined to start in
+business for myself and took professional chambers in Victoria
+Street.
+
+"I suppose that everyone finds his first independent start in
+business a dreary experience. To me it has been exceptionally so.
+During two years I have had three consultations and one small
+job, and that is absolutely all that my profession has brought
+me. My gross takings amount to 27 pounds 10s. Every day, from
+nine in the morning until four in the afternoon, I waited in my
+little den, until at last my heart began to sink, and I came to
+believe that I should never have any practice at all.
+
+"Yesterday, however, just as I was thinking of leaving the
+office, my clerk entered to say there was a gentleman waiting who
+wished to see me upon business. He brought up a card, too, with
+the name of 'Colonel Lysander Stark' engraved upon it. Close at
+his heels came the colonel himself, a man rather over the middle
+size, but of an exceeding thinness. I do not think that I have
+ever seen so thin a man. His whole face sharpened away into nose
+and chin, and the skin of his cheeks was drawn quite tense over
+his outstanding bones. Yet this emaciation seemed to be his
+natural habit, and due to no disease, for his eye was bright, his
+step brisk, and his bearing assured. He was plainly but neatly
+dressed, and his age, I should judge, would be nearer forty than
+thirty.
+
+"'Mr. Hatherley?' said he, with something of a German accent.
+'You have been recommended to me, Mr. Hatherley, as being a man
+who is not only proficient in his profession but is also discreet
+and capable of preserving a secret.'
+
+"I bowed, feeling as flattered as any young man would at such an
+address. 'May I ask who it was who gave me so good a character?'
+
+"'Well, perhaps it is better that I should not tell you that just
+at this moment. I have it from the same source that you are both
+an orphan and a bachelor and are residing alone in London.'
+
+"'That is quite correct,' I answered; 'but you will excuse me if
+I say that I cannot see how all this bears upon my professional
+qualifications. I understand that it was on a professional matter
+that you wished to speak to me?'
+
+"'Undoubtedly so. But you will find that all I say is really to
+the point. I have a professional commission for you, but absolute
+secrecy is quite essential--absolute secrecy, you understand, and
+of course we may expect that more from a man who is alone than
+from one who lives in the bosom of his family.'
+
+"'If I promise to keep a secret,' said I, 'you may absolutely
+depend upon my doing so.'
+
+"He looked very hard at me as I spoke, and it seemed to me that I
+had never seen so suspicious and questioning an eye.
+
+"'Do you promise, then?' said he at last.
+
+"'Yes, I promise.'
+
+"'Absolute and complete silence before, during, and after? No
+reference to the matter at all, either in word or writing?'
+
+"'I have already given you my word.'
+
+"'Very good.' He suddenly sprang up, and darting like lightning
+across the room he flung open the door. The passage outside was
+empty.
+
+"'That's all right,' said he, coming back. 'I know that clerks are
+sometimes curious as to their master's affairs. Now we can talk
+in safety.' He drew up his chair very close to mine and began to
+stare at me again with the same questioning and thoughtful look.
+
+"A feeling of repulsion, and of something akin to fear had begun
+to rise within me at the strange antics of this fleshless man.
+Even my dread of losing a client could not restrain me from
+showing my impatience.
+
+"'I beg that you will state your business, sir,' said I; 'my time
+is of value.' Heaven forgive me for that last sentence, but the
+words came to my lips.
+
+"'How would fifty guineas for a night's work suit you?' he asked.
+
+"'Most admirably.'
+
+"'I say a night's work, but an hour's would be nearer the mark. I
+simply want your opinion about a hydraulic stamping machine which
+has got out of gear. If you show us what is wrong we shall soon
+set it right ourselves. What do you think of such a commission as
+that?'
+
+"'The work appears to be light and the pay munificent.'
+
+"'Precisely so. We shall want you to come to-night by the last
+train.'
+
+"'Where to?'
+
+"'To Eyford, in Berkshire. It is a little place near the borders
+of Oxfordshire, and within seven miles of Reading. There is a
+train from Paddington which would bring you there at about
+11:15.'
+
+"'Very good.'
+
+"'I shall come down in a carriage to meet you.'
+
+"'There is a drive, then?'
+
+"'Yes, our little place is quite out in the country. It is a good
+seven miles from Eyford Station.'
+
+"'Then we can hardly get there before midnight. I suppose there
+would be no chance of a train back. I should be compelled to stop
+the night.'
+
+"'Yes, we could easily give you a shake-down.'
+
+"'That is very awkward. Could I not come at some more convenient
+hour?'
+
+"'We have judged it best that you should come late. It is to
+recompense you for any inconvenience that we are paying to you, a
+young and unknown man, a fee which would buy an opinion from the
+very heads of your profession. Still, of course, if you would
+like to draw out of the business, there is plenty of time to do
+so.'
+
+"I thought of the fifty guineas, and of how very useful they
+would be to me. 'Not at all,' said I, 'I shall be very happy to
+accommodate myself to your wishes. I should like, however, to
+understand a little more clearly what it is that you wish me to
+do.'
+
+"'Quite so. It is very natural that the pledge of secrecy which
+we have exacted from you should have aroused your curiosity. I
+have no wish to commit you to anything without your having it all
+laid before you. I suppose that we are absolutely safe from
+eavesdroppers?'
+
+"'Entirely.'
+
+"'Then the matter stands thus. You are probably aware that
+fuller's-earth is a valuable product, and that it is only found
+in one or two places in England?'
+
+"'I have heard so.'
+
+"'Some little time ago I bought a small place--a very small
+place--within ten miles of Reading. I was fortunate enough to
+discover that there was a deposit of fuller's-earth in one of my
+fields. On examining it, however, I found that this deposit was a
+comparatively small one, and that it formed a link between two
+very much larger ones upon the right and left--both of them,
+however, in the grounds of my neighbours. These good people were
+absolutely ignorant that their land contained that which was
+quite as valuable as a gold-mine. Naturally, it was to my
+interest to buy their land before they discovered its true value,
+but unfortunately I had no capital by which I could do this. I
+took a few of my friends into the secret, however, and they
+suggested that we should quietly and secretly work our own little
+deposit and that in this way we should earn the money which would
+enable us to buy the neighbouring fields. This we have now been
+doing for some time, and in order to help us in our operations we
+erected a hydraulic press. This press, as I have already
+explained, has got out of order, and we wish your advice upon the
+subject. We guard our secret very jealously, however, and if it
+once became known that we had hydraulic engineers coming to our
+little house, it would soon rouse inquiry, and then, if the facts
+came out, it would be good-bye to any chance of getting these
+fields and carrying out our plans. That is why I have made you
+promise me that you will not tell a human being that you are
+going to Eyford to-night. I hope that I make it all plain?'
+
+"'I quite follow you,' said I. 'The only point which I could not
+quite understand was what use you could make of a hydraulic press
+in excavating fuller's-earth, which, as I understand, is dug out
+like gravel from a pit.'
+
+"'Ah!' said he carelessly, 'we have our own process. We compress
+the earth into bricks, so as to remove them without revealing
+what they are. But that is a mere detail. I have taken you fully
+into my confidence now, Mr. Hatherley, and I have shown you how I
+trust you.' He rose as he spoke. 'I shall expect you, then, at
+Eyford at 11:15.'
+
+"'I shall certainly be there.'
+
+"'And not a word to a soul.' He looked at me with a last long,
+questioning gaze, and then, pressing my hand in a cold, dank
+grasp, he hurried from the room.
+
+"Well, when I came to think it all over in cool blood I was very
+much astonished, as you may both think, at this sudden commission
+which had been intrusted to me. On the one hand, of course, I was
+glad, for the fee was at least tenfold what I should have asked
+had I set a price upon my own services, and it was possible that
+this order might lead to other ones. On the other hand, the face
+and manner of my patron had made an unpleasant impression upon
+me, and I could not think that his explanation of the
+fuller's-earth was sufficient to explain the necessity for my
+coming at midnight, and his extreme anxiety lest I should tell
+anyone of my errand. However, I threw all fears to the winds, ate
+a hearty supper, drove to Paddington, and started off, having
+obeyed to the letter the injunction as to holding my tongue.
+
+"At Reading I had to change not only my carriage but my station.
+However, I was in time for the last train to Eyford, and I
+reached the little dim-lit station after eleven o'clock. I was the
+only passenger who got out there, and there was no one upon the
+platform save a single sleepy porter with a lantern. As I passed
+out through the wicket gate, however, I found my acquaintance of
+the morning waiting in the shadow upon the other side. Without a
+word he grasped my arm and hurried me into a carriage, the door
+of which was standing open. He drew up the windows on either
+side, tapped on the wood-work, and away we went as fast as the
+horse could go."
+
+"One horse?" interjected Holmes.
+
+"Yes, only one."
+
+"Did you observe the colour?"
+
+"Yes, I saw it by the side-lights when I was stepping into the
+carriage. It was a chestnut."
+
+"Tired-looking or fresh?"
+
+"Oh, fresh and glossy."
+
+"Thank you. I am sorry to have interrupted you. Pray continue
+your most interesting statement."
+
+"Away we went then, and we drove for at least an hour. Colonel
+Lysander Stark had said that it was only seven miles, but I
+should think, from the rate that we seemed to go, and from the
+time that we took, that it must have been nearer twelve. He sat
+at my side in silence all the time, and I was aware, more than
+once when I glanced in his direction, that he was looking at me
+with great intensity. The country roads seem to be not very good
+in that part of the world, for we lurched and jolted terribly. I
+tried to look out of the windows to see something of where we
+were, but they were made of frosted glass, and I could make out
+nothing save the occasional bright blur of a passing light. Now
+and then I hazarded some remark to break the monotony of the
+journey, but the colonel answered only in monosyllables, and the
+conversation soon flagged. At last, however, the bumping of the
+road was exchanged for the crisp smoothness of a gravel-drive,
+and the carriage came to a stand. Colonel Lysander Stark sprang
+out, and, as I followed after him, pulled me swiftly into a porch
+which gaped in front of us. We stepped, as it were, right out of
+the carriage and into the hall, so that I failed to catch the
+most fleeting glance of the front of the house. The instant that
+I had crossed the threshold the door slammed heavily behind us,
+and I heard faintly the rattle of the wheels as the carriage
+drove away.
+
+"It was pitch dark inside the house, and the colonel fumbled
+about looking for matches and muttering under his breath.
+Suddenly a door opened at the other end of the passage, and a
+long, golden bar of light shot out in our direction. It grew
+broader, and a woman appeared with a lamp in her hand, which she
+held above her head, pushing her face forward and peering at us.
+I could see that she was pretty, and from the gloss with which
+the light shone upon her dark dress I knew that it was a rich
+material. She spoke a few words in a foreign tongue in a tone as
+though asking a question, and when my companion answered in a
+gruff monosyllable she gave such a start that the lamp nearly
+fell from her hand. Colonel Stark went up to her, whispered
+something in her ear, and then, pushing her back into the room
+from whence she had come, he walked towards me again with the
+lamp in his hand.
+
+"'Perhaps you will have the kindness to wait in this room for a
+few minutes,' said he, throwing open another door. It was a
+quiet, little, plainly furnished room, with a round table in the
+centre, on which several German books were scattered. Colonel
+Stark laid down the lamp on the top of a harmonium beside the
+door. 'I shall not keep you waiting an instant,' said he, and
+vanished into the darkness.
+
+"I glanced at the books upon the table, and in spite of my
+ignorance of German I could see that two of them were treatises
+on science, the others being volumes of poetry. Then I walked
+across to the window, hoping that I might catch some glimpse of
+the country-side, but an oak shutter, heavily barred, was folded
+across it. It was a wonderfully silent house. There was an old
+clock ticking loudly somewhere in the passage, but otherwise
+everything was deadly still. A vague feeling of uneasiness began
+to steal over me. Who were these German people, and what were
+they doing living in this strange, out-of-the-way place? And
+where was the place? I was ten miles or so from Eyford, that was
+all I knew, but whether north, south, east, or west I had no
+idea. For that matter, Reading, and possibly other large towns,
+were within that radius, so the place might not be so secluded,
+after all. Yet it was quite certain, from the absolute stillness,
+that we were in the country. I paced up and down the room,
+humming a tune under my breath to keep up my spirits and feeling
+that I was thoroughly earning my fifty-guinea fee.
+
+"Suddenly, without any preliminary sound in the midst of the
+utter stillness, the door of my room swung slowly open. The woman
+was standing in the aperture, the darkness of the hall behind
+her, the yellow light from my lamp beating upon her eager and
+beautiful face. I could see at a glance that she was sick with
+fear, and the sight sent a chill to my own heart. She held up one
+shaking finger to warn me to be silent, and she shot a few
+whispered words of broken English at me, her eyes glancing back,
+like those of a frightened horse, into the gloom behind her.
+
+"'I would go,' said she, trying hard, as it seemed to me, to
+speak calmly; 'I would go. I should not stay here. There is no
+good for you to do.'
+
+"'But, madam,' said I, 'I have not yet done what I came for. I
+cannot possibly leave until I have seen the machine.'
+
+"'It is not worth your while to wait,' she went on. 'You can pass
+through the door; no one hinders.' And then, seeing that I smiled
+and shook my head, she suddenly threw aside her constraint and
+made a step forward, with her hands wrung together. 'For the love
+of Heaven!' she whispered, 'get away from here before it is too
+late!'
+
+"But I am somewhat headstrong by nature, and the more ready to
+engage in an affair when there is some obstacle in the way. I
+thought of my fifty-guinea fee, of my wearisome journey, and of
+the unpleasant night which seemed to be before me. Was it all to
+go for nothing? Why should I slink away without having carried
+out my commission, and without the payment which was my due? This
+woman might, for all I knew, be a monomaniac. With a stout
+bearing, therefore, though her manner had shaken me more than I
+cared to confess, I still shook my head and declared my intention
+of remaining where I was. She was about to renew her entreaties
+when a door slammed overhead, and the sound of several footsteps
+was heard upon the stairs. She listened for an instant, threw up
+her hands with a despairing gesture, and vanished as suddenly and
+as noiselessly as she had come.
+
+"The newcomers were Colonel Lysander Stark and a short thick man
+with a chinchilla beard growing out of the creases of his double
+chin, who was introduced to me as Mr. Ferguson.
+
+"'This is my secretary and manager,' said the colonel. 'By the
+way, I was under the impression that I left this door shut just
+now. I fear that you have felt the draught.'
+
+"'On the contrary,' said I, 'I opened the door myself because I
+felt the room to be a little close.'
+
+"He shot one of his suspicious looks at me. 'Perhaps we had
+better proceed to business, then,' said he. 'Mr. Ferguson and I
+will take you up to see the machine.'
+
+"'I had better put my hat on, I suppose.'
+
+"'Oh, no, it is in the house.'
+
+"'What, you dig fuller's-earth in the house?'
+
+"'No, no. This is only where we compress it. But never mind that.
+All we wish you to do is to examine the machine and to let us
+know what is wrong with it.'
+
+"We went upstairs together, the colonel first with the lamp, the
+fat manager and I behind him. It was a labyrinth of an old house,
+with corridors, passages, narrow winding staircases, and little
+low doors, the thresholds of which were hollowed out by the
+generations who had crossed them. There were no carpets and no
+signs of any furniture above the ground floor, while the plaster
+was peeling off the walls, and the damp was breaking through in
+green, unhealthy blotches. I tried to put on as unconcerned an
+air as possible, but I had not forgotten the warnings of the
+lady, even though I disregarded them, and I kept a keen eye upon
+my two companions. Ferguson appeared to be a morose and silent
+man, but I could see from the little that he said that he was at
+least a fellow-countryman.
+
+"Colonel Lysander Stark stopped at last before a low door, which
+he unlocked. Within was a small, square room, in which the three
+of us could hardly get at one time. Ferguson remained outside,
+and the colonel ushered me in.
+
+"'We are now,' said he, 'actually within the hydraulic press, and
+it would be a particularly unpleasant thing for us if anyone were
+to turn it on. The ceiling of this small chamber is really the
+end of the descending piston, and it comes down with the force of
+many tons upon this metal floor. There are small lateral columns
+of water outside which receive the force, and which transmit and
+multiply it in the manner which is familiar to you. The machine
+goes readily enough, but there is some stiffness in the working
+of it, and it has lost a little of its force. Perhaps you will
+have the goodness to look it over and to show us how we can set
+it right.'
+
+"I took the lamp from him, and I examined the machine very
+thoroughly. It was indeed a gigantic one, and capable of
+exercising enormous pressure. When I passed outside, however, and
+pressed down the levers which controlled it, I knew at once by
+the whishing sound that there was a slight leakage, which allowed
+a regurgitation of water through one of the side cylinders. An
+examination showed that one of the india-rubber bands which was
+round the head of a driving-rod had shrunk so as not quite to
+fill the socket along which it worked. This was clearly the cause
+of the loss of power, and I pointed it out to my companions, who
+followed my remarks very carefully and asked several practical
+questions as to how they should proceed to set it right. When I
+had made it clear to them, I returned to the main chamber of the
+machine and took a good look at it to satisfy my own curiosity.
+It was obvious at a glance that the story of the fuller's-earth
+was the merest fabrication, for it would be absurd to suppose
+that so powerful an engine could be designed for so inadequate a
+purpose. The walls were of wood, but the floor consisted of a
+large iron trough, and when I came to examine it I could see a
+crust of metallic deposit all over it. I had stooped and was
+scraping at this to see exactly what it was when I heard a
+muttered exclamation in German and saw the cadaverous face of the
+colonel looking down at me.
+
+"'What are you doing there?' he asked.
+
+"I felt angry at having been tricked by so elaborate a story as
+that which he had told me. 'I was admiring your fuller's-earth,'
+said I; 'I think that I should be better able to advise you as to
+your machine if I knew what the exact purpose was for which it
+was used.'
+
+"The instant that I uttered the words I regretted the rashness of
+my speech. His face set hard, and a baleful light sprang up in
+his grey eyes.
+
+"'Very well,' said he, 'you shall know all about the machine.' He
+took a step backward, slammed the little door, and turned the key
+in the lock. I rushed towards it and pulled at the handle, but it
+was quite secure, and did not give in the least to my kicks and
+shoves. 'Hullo!' I yelled. 'Hullo! Colonel! Let me out!'
+
+"And then suddenly in the silence I heard a sound which sent my
+heart into my mouth. It was the clank of the levers and the swish
+of the leaking cylinder. He had set the engine at work. The lamp
+still stood upon the floor where I had placed it when examining
+the trough. By its light I saw that the black ceiling was coming
+down upon me, slowly, jerkily, but, as none knew better than
+myself, with a force which must within a minute grind me to a
+shapeless pulp. I threw myself, screaming, against the door, and
+dragged with my nails at the lock. I implored the colonel to let
+me out, but the remorseless clanking of the levers drowned my
+cries. The ceiling was only a foot or two above my head, and with
+my hand upraised I could feel its hard, rough surface. Then it
+flashed through my mind that the pain of my death would depend
+very much upon the position in which I met it. If I lay on my
+face the weight would come upon my spine, and I shuddered to
+think of that dreadful snap. Easier the other way, perhaps; and
+yet, had I the nerve to lie and look up at that deadly black
+shadow wavering down upon me? Already I was unable to stand
+erect, when my eye caught something which brought a gush of hope
+back to my heart.
+
+"I have said that though the floor and ceiling were of iron, the
+walls were of wood. As I gave a last hurried glance around, I saw
+a thin line of yellow light between two of the boards, which
+broadened and broadened as a small panel was pushed backward. For
+an instant I could hardly believe that here was indeed a door
+which led away from death. The next instant I threw myself
+through, and lay half-fainting upon the other side. The panel had
+closed again behind me, but the crash of the lamp, and a few
+moments afterwards the clang of the two slabs of metal, told me
+how narrow had been my escape.
+
+"I was recalled to myself by a frantic plucking at my wrist, and
+I found myself lying upon the stone floor of a narrow corridor,
+while a woman bent over me and tugged at me with her left hand,
+while she held a candle in her right. It was the same good friend
+whose warning I had so foolishly rejected.
+
+"'Come! come!' she cried breathlessly. 'They will be here in a
+moment. They will see that you are not there. Oh, do not waste
+the so-precious time, but come!'
+
+"This time, at least, I did not scorn her advice. I staggered to
+my feet and ran with her along the corridor and down a winding
+stair. The latter led to another broad passage, and just as we
+reached it we heard the sound of running feet and the shouting of
+two voices, one answering the other from the floor on which  we
+were and from the one beneath. My guide stopped and looked about
+her like one  who is at her wit's end. Then she threw open a door
+which led into a bedroom, through the window of which the moon
+was shining brightly.
+
+"'It is your only chance,' said she. 'It is high, but it may be
+that you can jump it.'
+
+"As she spoke a light sprang into view at the further end of the
+passage, and I saw the lean figure of Colonel Lysander Stark
+rushing forward with a lantern in one hand and a weapon like a
+butcher's cleaver in the other. I rushed across the bedroom,
+flung open the window, and looked out. How quiet and sweet and
+wholesome the garden looked in the moonlight, and it could not be
+more than thirty feet down. I clambered out upon the sill, but I
+hesitated to jump until I should have heard what passed between
+my saviour and the ruffian who pursued me. If she were ill-used,
+then at any risks I was determined to go back to her assistance.
+The thought had hardly flashed through my mind before he was at
+the door, pushing his way past her; but she threw her arms round
+him and tried to hold him back.
+
+"'Fritz! Fritz!' she cried in English, 'remember your promise
+after the last time. You said it should not be again. He will be
+silent! Oh, he will be silent!'
+
+"'You are mad, Elise!' he shouted, struggling to break away from
+her. 'You will be the ruin of us. He has seen too much. Let me
+pass, I say!' He dashed her to one side, and, rushing to the
+window, cut at me with his heavy weapon. I had let myself go, and
+was hanging by the hands to the sill, when his blow fell. I was
+conscious of a dull pain, my grip loosened, and I fell into the
+garden below.
+
+"I was shaken but not hurt by the fall; so I picked myself up and
+rushed off among the bushes as hard as I could run, for I
+understood that I was far from being out of danger yet. Suddenly,
+however, as I ran, a deadly dizziness and sickness came over me.
+I glanced down at my hand, which was throbbing painfully, and
+then, for the first time, saw that my thumb had been cut off and
+that the blood was pouring from my wound. I endeavoured to tie my
+handkerchief round it, but there came a sudden buzzing in my
+ears, and next moment I fell in a dead faint among the
+rose-bushes.
+
+"How long I remained unconscious I cannot tell. It must have been
+a very long time, for the moon had sunk, and a bright morning was
+breaking when I came to myself. My clothes were all sodden with
+dew, and my coat-sleeve was drenched with blood from my wounded
+thumb. The smarting of it recalled in an instant all the
+particulars of my night's adventure, and I sprang to my feet with
+the feeling that I might hardly yet be safe from my pursuers. But
+to my astonishment, when I came to look round me, neither house
+nor garden were to be seen. I had been lying in an angle of the
+hedge close by the highroad, and just a little lower down was a
+long building, which proved, upon my approaching it, to be the
+very station at which I had arrived upon the previous night. Were
+it not for the ugly wound upon my hand, all that had passed
+during those dreadful hours might have been an evil dream.
+
+"Half dazed, I went into the station and asked about the morning
+train. There would be one to Reading in less than an hour. The
+same porter was on duty, I found, as had been there when I
+arrived. I inquired of him whether he had ever heard of Colonel
+Lysander Stark. The name was strange to him. Had he observed a
+carriage the night before waiting for me? No, he had not. Was
+there a police-station anywhere near? There was one about three
+miles off.
+
+"It was too far for me to go, weak and ill as I was. I determined
+to wait until I got back to town before telling my story to the
+police. It was a little past six when I arrived, so I went first
+to have my wound dressed, and then the doctor was kind enough to
+bring me along here. I put the case into your hands and shall do
+exactly what you advise."
+
+We both sat in silence for some little time after listening to
+this extraordinary narrative. Then Sherlock Holmes pulled down
+from the shelf one of the ponderous commonplace books in which he
+placed his cuttings.
+
+"Here is an advertisement which will interest you," said he. "It
+appeared in all the papers about a year ago. Listen to this:
+'Lost, on the 9th inst., Mr. Jeremiah Hayling, aged
+twenty-six, a hydraulic engineer. Left his lodgings at ten
+o'clock at night, and has not been heard of since. Was
+dressed in,' etc., etc. Ha! That represents the last time that
+the colonel needed to have his machine overhauled, I fancy."
+
+"Good heavens!" cried my patient. "Then that explains what the
+girl said."
+
+"Undoubtedly. It is quite clear that the colonel was a cool and
+desperate man, who was absolutely determined that nothing should
+stand in the way of his little game, like those out-and-out
+pirates who will leave no survivor from a captured ship. Well,
+every moment now is precious, so if you feel equal to it we shall
+go down to Scotland Yard at once as a preliminary to starting for
+Eyford."
+
+Some three hours or so afterwards we were all in the train
+together, bound from Reading to the little Berkshire village.
+There were Sherlock Holmes, the hydraulic engineer, Inspector
+Bradstreet, of Scotland Yard, a plain-clothes man, and myself.
+Bradstreet had spread an ordnance map of the county out upon the
+seat and was busy with his compasses drawing a circle with Eyford
+for its centre.
+
+"There you are," said he. "That circle is drawn at a radius of
+ten miles from the village. The place we want must be somewhere
+near that line. You said ten miles, I think, sir."
+
+"It was an hour's good drive."
+
+"And you think that they brought you back all that way when you
+were unconscious?"
+
+"They must have done so. I have a confused memory, too, of having
+been lifted and conveyed somewhere."
+
+"What I cannot understand," said I, "is why they should have
+spared you when they found you lying fainting in the garden.
+Perhaps the villain was softened by the woman's entreaties."
+
+"I hardly think that likely. I never saw a more inexorable face
+in my life."
+
+"Oh, we shall soon clear up all that," said Bradstreet. "Well, I
+have drawn my circle, and I only wish I knew at what point upon
+it the folk that we are in search of are to be found."
+
+"I think I could lay my finger on it," said Holmes quietly.
+
+"Really, now!" cried the inspector, "you have formed your
+opinion! Come, now, we shall see who agrees with you. I say it is
+south, for the country is more deserted there."
+
+"And I say east," said my patient.
+
+"I am for west," remarked the plain-clothes man. "There are
+several quiet little villages up there."
+
+"And I am for north," said I, "because there are no hills there,
+and our friend says that he did not notice the carriage go up
+any."
+
+"Come," cried the inspector, laughing; "it's a very pretty
+diversity of opinion. We have boxed the compass among us. Who do
+you give your casting vote to?"
+
+"You are all wrong."
+
+"But we can't all be."
+
+"Oh, yes, you can. This is my point." He placed his finger in the
+centre of the circle. "This is where we shall find them."
+
+"But the twelve-mile drive?" gasped Hatherley.
+
+"Six out and six back. Nothing simpler. You say yourself that the
+horse was fresh and glossy when you got in. How could it be that
+if it had gone twelve miles over heavy roads?"
+
+"Indeed, it is a likely ruse enough," observed Bradstreet
+thoughtfully. "Of course there can be no doubt as to the nature
+of this gang."
+
+"None at all," said Holmes. "They are coiners on a large scale,
+and have used the machine to form the amalgam which has taken the
+place of silver."
+
+"We have known for some time that a clever gang was at work,"
+said the inspector. "They have been turning out half-crowns by
+the thousand. We even traced them as far as Reading, but could
+get no farther, for they had covered their traces in a way that
+showed that they were very old hands. But now, thanks to this
+lucky chance, I think that we have got them right enough."
+
+But the inspector was mistaken, for those criminals were not
+destined to fall into the hands of justice. As we rolled into
+Eyford Station we saw a gigantic column of smoke which streamed
+up from behind a small clump of trees in the neighbourhood and
+hung like an immense ostrich feather over the landscape.
+
+"A house on fire?" asked Bradstreet as the train steamed off
+again on its way.
+
+"Yes, sir!" said the station-master.
+
+"When did it break out?"
+
+"I hear that it was during the night, sir, but it has got worse,
+and the whole place is in a blaze."
+
+"Whose house is it?"
+
+"Dr. Becher's."
+
+"Tell me," broke in the engineer, "is Dr. Becher a German, very
+thin, with a long, sharp nose?"
+
+The station-master laughed heartily. "No, sir, Dr. Becher is an
+Englishman, and there isn't a man in the parish who has a
+better-lined waistcoat. But he has a gentleman staying with him,
+a patient, as I understand, who is a foreigner, and he looks as
+if a little good Berkshire beef would do him no harm."
+
+The station-master had not finished his speech before we were all
+hastening in the direction of the fire. The road topped a low
+hill, and there was a great widespread whitewashed building in
+front of us, spouting fire at every chink and window, while in
+the garden in front three fire-engines were vainly striving to
+keep the flames under.
+
+"That's it!" cried Hatherley, in intense excitement. "There is
+the gravel-drive, and there are the rose-bushes where I lay. That
+second window is the one that I jumped from."
+
+"Well, at least," said Holmes, "you have had your revenge upon
+them. There can be no question that it was your oil-lamp which,
+when it was crushed in the press, set fire to the wooden walls,
+though no doubt they were too excited in the chase after you to
+observe it at the time. Now keep your eyes open in this crowd for
+your friends of last night, though I very much fear that they are
+a good hundred miles off by now."
+
+And Holmes' fears came to be realised, for from that day to this
+no word has ever been heard either of the beautiful woman, the
+sinister German, or the morose Englishman. Early that morning a
+peasant had met a cart containing several people and some very
+bulky boxes driving rapidly in the direction of Reading, but
+there all traces of the fugitives disappeared, and even Holmes'
+ingenuity failed ever to discover the least clue as to their
+whereabouts.
+
+The firemen had been much perturbed at the strange arrangements
+which they had found within, and still more so by discovering a
+newly severed human thumb upon a window-sill of the second floor.
+About sunset, however, their efforts were at last successful, and
+they subdued the flames, but not before the roof had fallen in,
+and the whole place been reduced to such absolute ruin that, save
+some twisted cylinders and iron piping, not a trace remained of
+the machinery which had cost our unfortunate acquaintance so
+dearly. Large masses of nickel and of tin were discovered stored
+in an out-house, but no coins were to be found, which may have
+explained the presence of those bulky boxes which have been
+already referred to.
+
+How our hydraulic engineer had been conveyed from the garden to
+the spot where he recovered his senses might have remained
+forever a mystery were it not for the soft mould, which told us a
+very plain tale. He had evidently been carried down by two
+persons, one of whom had remarkably small feet and the other
+unusually large ones. On the whole, it was most probable that the
+silent Englishman, being less bold or less murderous than his
+companion, had assisted the woman to bear the unconscious man out
+of the way of danger.
+
+"Well," said our engineer ruefully as we took our seats to return
+once more to London, "it has been a pretty business for me! I
+have lost my thumb and I have lost a fifty-guinea fee, and what
+have I gained?"
+
+"Experience," said Holmes, laughing. "Indirectly it may be of
+value, you know; you have only to put it into words to gain the
+reputation of being excellent company for the remainder of your
+existence."
+
+
+
+X. THE ADVENTURE OF THE NOBLE BACHELOR
+
+The Lord St. Simon marriage, and its curious termination, have
+long ceased to be a subject of interest in those exalted circles
+in which the unfortunate bridegroom moves. Fresh scandals have
+eclipsed it, and their more piquant details have drawn the
+gossips away from this four-year-old drama. As I have reason to
+believe, however, that the full facts have never been revealed to
+the general public, and as my friend Sherlock Holmes had a
+considerable share in clearing the matter up, I feel that no
+memoir of him would be complete without some little sketch of
+this remarkable episode.
+
+It was a few weeks before my own marriage, during the days when I
+was still sharing rooms with Holmes in Baker Street, that he came
+home from an afternoon stroll to find a letter on the table
+waiting for him. I had remained indoors all day, for the weather
+had taken a sudden turn to rain, with high autumnal winds, and
+the Jezail bullet which I had brought back in one of my limbs as
+a relic of my Afghan campaign throbbed with dull persistence.
+With my body in one easy-chair and my legs upon another, I had
+surrounded myself with a cloud of newspapers until at last,
+saturated with the news of the day, I tossed them all aside and
+lay listless, watching the huge crest and monogram upon the
+envelope upon the table and wondering lazily who my friend's
+noble correspondent could be.
+
+"Here is a very fashionable epistle," I remarked as he entered.
+"Your morning letters, if I remember right, were from a
+fish-monger and a tide-waiter."
+
+"Yes, my correspondence has certainly the charm of variety," he
+answered, smiling, "and the humbler are usually the more
+interesting. This looks like one of those unwelcome social
+summonses which call upon a man either to be bored or to lie."
+
+He broke the seal and glanced over the contents.
+
+"Oh, come, it may prove to be something of interest, after all."
+
+"Not social, then?"
+
+"No, distinctly professional."
+
+"And from a noble client?"
+
+"One of the highest in England."
+
+"My dear fellow, I congratulate you."
+
+"I assure you, Watson, without affectation, that the status of my
+client is a matter of less moment to me than the interest of his
+case. It is just possible, however, that that also may not be
+wanting in this new investigation. You have been reading the
+papers diligently of late, have you not?"
+
+"It looks like it," said I ruefully, pointing to a huge bundle in
+the corner. "I have had nothing else to do."
+
+"It is fortunate, for you will perhaps be able to post me up. I
+read nothing except the criminal news and the agony column. The
+latter is always instructive. But if you have followed recent
+events so closely you must have read about Lord St. Simon and his
+wedding?"
+
+"Oh, yes, with the deepest interest."
+
+"That is well. The letter which I hold in my hand is from Lord
+St. Simon. I will read it to you, and in return you must turn
+over these papers and let me have whatever bears upon the matter.
+This is what he says:
+
+"'MY DEAR MR. SHERLOCK HOLMES:--Lord Backwater tells me that I
+may place implicit reliance upon your judgment and discretion. I
+have determined, therefore, to call upon you and to consult you
+in reference to the very painful event which has occurred in
+connection with my wedding. Mr. Lestrade, of Scotland Yard, is
+acting already in the matter, but he assures me that he sees no
+objection to your co-operation, and that he even thinks that
+it might be of some assistance. I will call at four o'clock in
+the afternoon, and, should you have any other engagement at that
+time, I hope that you will postpone it, as this matter is of
+paramount importance. Yours faithfully, ST. SIMON.'
+
+"It is dated from Grosvenor Mansions, written with a quill pen,
+and the noble lord has had the misfortune to get a smear of ink
+upon the outer side of his right little finger," remarked Holmes
+as he folded up the epistle.
+
+"He says four o'clock. It is three now. He will be here in an
+hour."
+
+"Then I have just time, with your assistance, to get clear upon
+the subject. Turn over those papers and arrange the extracts in
+their order of time, while I take a glance as to who our client
+is." He picked a red-covered volume from a line of books of
+reference beside the mantelpiece. "Here he is," said he, sitting
+down and flattening it out upon his knee. "'Lord Robert Walsingham
+de Vere St. Simon, second son of the Duke of Balmoral.' Hum! 'Arms:
+Azure, three caltrops in chief over a fess sable. Born in 1846.'
+He's forty-one years of age, which is mature for marriage. Was
+Under-Secretary for the colonies in a late administration. The
+Duke, his father, was at one time Secretary for Foreign Affairs.
+They inherit Plantagenet blood by direct descent, and Tudor on
+the distaff side. Ha! Well, there is nothing very instructive in
+all this. I think that I must turn to you Watson, for something
+more solid."
+
+"I have very little difficulty in finding what I want," said I,
+"for the facts are quite recent, and the matter struck me as
+remarkable. I feared to refer them to you, however, as I knew
+that you had an inquiry on hand and that you disliked the
+intrusion of other matters."
+
+"Oh, you mean the little problem of the Grosvenor Square
+furniture van. That is quite cleared up now--though, indeed, it
+was obvious from the first. Pray give me the results of your
+newspaper selections."
+
+"Here is the first notice which I can find. It is in the personal
+column of the Morning Post, and dates, as you see, some weeks
+back: 'A marriage has been arranged,' it says, 'and will, if
+rumour is correct, very shortly take place, between Lord Robert
+St. Simon, second son of the Duke of Balmoral, and Miss Hatty
+Doran, the only daughter of Aloysius Doran. Esq., of San
+Francisco, Cal., U.S.A.' That is all."
+
+"Terse and to the point," remarked Holmes, stretching his long,
+thin legs towards the fire.
+
+"There was a paragraph amplifying this in one of the society
+papers of the same week. Ah, here it is: 'There will soon be a
+call for protection in the marriage market, for the present
+free-trade principle appears to tell heavily against our home
+product. One by one the management of the noble houses of Great
+Britain is passing into the hands of our fair cousins from across
+the Atlantic. An important addition has been made during the last
+week to the list of the prizes which have been borne away by
+these charming invaders. Lord St. Simon, who has shown himself
+for over twenty years proof against the little god's arrows, has
+now definitely announced his approaching marriage with Miss Hatty
+Doran, the fascinating daughter of a California millionaire. Miss
+Doran, whose graceful figure and striking face attracted much
+attention at the Westbury House festivities, is an only child,
+and it is currently reported that her dowry will run to
+considerably over the six figures, with expectancies for the
+future. As it is an open secret that the Duke of Balmoral has
+been compelled to sell his pictures within the last few years,
+and as Lord St. Simon has no property of his own save the small
+estate of Birchmoor, it is obvious that the Californian heiress
+is not the only gainer by an alliance which will enable her to
+make the easy and common transition from a Republican lady to a
+British peeress.'"
+
+"Anything else?" asked Holmes, yawning.
+
+"Oh, yes; plenty. Then there is another note in the Morning Post
+to say that the marriage would be an absolutely quiet one, that it
+would be at St. George's, Hanover Square, that only half a dozen
+intimate friends would be invited, and that the party would
+return to the furnished house at Lancaster Gate which has been
+taken by Mr. Aloysius Doran. Two days later--that is, on
+Wednesday last--there is a curt announcement that the wedding had
+taken place, and that the honeymoon would be passed at Lord
+Backwater's place, near Petersfield. Those are all the notices
+which appeared before the disappearance of the bride."
+
+"Before the what?" asked Holmes with a start.
+
+"The vanishing of the lady."
+
+"When did she vanish, then?"
+
+"At the wedding breakfast."
+
+"Indeed. This is more interesting than it promised to be; quite
+dramatic, in fact."
+
+"Yes; it struck me as being a little out of the common."
+
+"They often vanish before the ceremony, and occasionally during
+the honeymoon; but I cannot call to mind anything quite so prompt
+as this. Pray let me have the details."
+
+"I warn you that they are very incomplete."
+
+"Perhaps we may make them less so."
+
+"Such as they are, they are set forth in a single article of a
+morning paper of yesterday, which I will read to you. It is
+headed, 'Singular Occurrence at a Fashionable Wedding':
+
+"'The family of Lord Robert St. Simon has been thrown into the
+greatest consternation by the strange and painful episodes which
+have taken place in connection with his wedding. The ceremony, as
+shortly announced in the papers of yesterday, occurred on the
+previous morning; but it is only now that it has been possible to
+confirm the strange rumours which have been so persistently
+floating about. In spite of the attempts of the friends to hush
+the matter up, so much public attention has now been drawn to it
+that no good purpose can be served by affecting to disregard what
+is a common subject for conversation.
+
+"'The ceremony, which was performed at St. George's, Hanover
+Square, was a very quiet one, no one being present save the
+father of the bride, Mr. Aloysius Doran, the Duchess of Balmoral,
+Lord Backwater, Lord Eustace and Lady Clara St. Simon (the
+younger brother and sister of the bridegroom), and Lady Alicia
+Whittington. The whole party proceeded afterwards to the house of
+Mr. Aloysius Doran, at Lancaster Gate, where breakfast had been
+prepared. It appears that some little trouble was caused by a
+woman, whose name has not been ascertained, who endeavoured to
+force her way into the house after the bridal party, alleging
+that she had some claim upon Lord St. Simon. It was only after a
+painful and prolonged scene that she was ejected by the butler
+and the footman. The bride, who had fortunately entered the house
+before this unpleasant interruption, had sat down to breakfast
+with the rest, when she complained of a sudden indisposition and
+retired to her room. Her prolonged absence having caused some
+comment, her father followed her, but learned from her maid that
+she had only come up to her chamber for an instant, caught up an
+ulster and bonnet, and hurried down to the passage. One of the
+footmen declared that he had seen a lady leave the house thus
+apparelled, but had refused to credit that it was his mistress,
+believing her to be with the company. On ascertaining that his
+daughter had disappeared, Mr. Aloysius Doran, in conjunction with
+the bridegroom, instantly put themselves in communication with
+the police, and very energetic inquiries are being made, which
+will probably result in a speedy clearing up of this very
+singular business. Up to a late hour last night, however, nothing
+had transpired as to the whereabouts of the missing lady. There
+are rumours of foul play in the matter, and it is said that the
+police have caused the arrest of the woman who had caused the
+original disturbance, in the belief that, from jealousy or some
+other motive, she may have been concerned in the strange
+disappearance of the bride.'"
+
+"And is that all?"
+
+"Only one little item in another of the morning papers, but it is
+a suggestive one."
+
+"And it is--"
+
+"That Miss Flora Millar, the lady who had caused the disturbance,
+has actually been arrested. It appears that she was formerly a
+danseuse at the Allegro, and that she has known the bridegroom
+for some years. There are no further particulars, and the whole
+case is in your hands now--so far as it has been set forth in the
+public press."
+
+"And an exceedingly interesting case it appears to be. I would
+not have missed it for worlds. But there is a ring at the bell,
+Watson, and as the clock makes it a few minutes after four, I
+have no doubt that this will prove to be our noble client. Do not
+dream of going, Watson, for I very much prefer having a witness,
+if only as a check to my own memory."
+
+"Lord Robert St. Simon," announced our page-boy, throwing open
+the door. A gentleman entered, with a pleasant, cultured face,
+high-nosed and pale, with something perhaps of petulance about
+the mouth, and with the steady, well-opened eye of a man whose
+pleasant lot it had ever been to command and to be obeyed. His
+manner was brisk, and yet his general appearance gave an undue
+impression of age, for he had a slight forward stoop and a little
+bend of the knees as he walked. His hair, too, as he swept off
+his very curly-brimmed hat, was grizzled round the edges and thin
+upon the top. As to his dress, it was careful to the verge of
+foppishness, with high collar, black frock-coat, white waistcoat,
+yellow gloves, patent-leather shoes, and light-coloured gaiters.
+He advanced slowly into the room, turning his head from left to
+right, and swinging in his right hand the cord which held his
+golden eyeglasses.
+
+"Good-day, Lord St. Simon," said Holmes, rising and bowing. "Pray
+take the basket-chair. This is my friend and colleague, Dr.
+Watson. Draw up a little to the fire, and we will talk this
+matter over."
+
+"A most painful matter to me, as you can most readily imagine,
+Mr. Holmes. I have been cut to the quick. I understand that you
+have already managed several delicate cases of this sort, sir,
+though I presume that they were hardly from the same class of
+society."
+
+"No, I am descending."
+
+"I beg pardon."
+
+"My last client of the sort was a king."
+
+"Oh, really! I had no idea. And which king?"
+
+"The King of Scandinavia."
+
+"What! Had he lost his wife?"
+
+"You can understand," said Holmes suavely, "that I extend to the
+affairs of my other clients the same secrecy which I promise to
+you in yours."
+
+"Of course! Very right! very right! I'm sure I beg pardon. As to
+my own case, I am ready to give you any information which may
+assist you in forming an opinion."
+
+"Thank you. I have already learned all that is in the public
+prints, nothing more. I presume that I may take it as correct--this
+article, for example, as to the disappearance of the bride."
+
+Lord St. Simon glanced over it. "Yes, it is correct, as far as it
+goes."
+
+"But it needs a great deal of supplementing before anyone could
+offer an opinion. I think that I may arrive at my facts most
+directly by questioning you."
+
+"Pray do so."
+
+"When did you first meet Miss Hatty Doran?"
+
+"In San Francisco, a year ago."
+
+"You were travelling in the States?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"Did you become engaged then?"
+
+"No."
+
+"But you were on a friendly footing?"
+
+"I was amused by her society, and she could see that I was
+amused."
+
+"Her father is very rich?"
+
+"He is said to be the richest man on the Pacific slope."
+
+"And how did he make his money?"
+
+"In mining. He had nothing a few years ago. Then he struck gold,
+invested it, and came up by leaps and bounds."
+
+"Now, what is your own impression as to the young lady's--your
+wife's character?"
+
+The nobleman swung his glasses a little faster and stared down
+into the fire. "You see, Mr. Holmes," said he, "my wife was
+twenty before her father became a rich man. During that time she
+ran free in a mining camp and wandered through woods or
+mountains, so that her education has come from Nature rather than
+from the schoolmaster. She is what we call in England a tomboy,
+with a strong nature, wild and free, unfettered by any sort of
+traditions. She is impetuous--volcanic, I was about to say. She
+is swift in making up her mind and fearless in carrying out her
+resolutions. On the other hand, I would not have given her the
+name which I have the honour to bear"--he gave a little stately
+cough--"had not I thought her to be at bottom a noble woman. I
+believe that she is capable of heroic self-sacrifice and that
+anything dishonourable would be repugnant to her."
+
+"Have you her photograph?"
+
+"I brought this with me." He opened a locket and showed us the
+full face of a very lovely woman. It was not a photograph but an
+ivory miniature, and the artist had brought out the full effect
+of the lustrous black hair, the large dark eyes, and the
+exquisite mouth. Holmes gazed long and earnestly at it. Then he
+closed the locket and handed it back to Lord St. Simon.
+
+"The young lady came to London, then, and you renewed your
+acquaintance?"
+
+"Yes, her father brought her over for this last London season. I
+met her several times, became engaged to her, and have now
+married her."
+
+"She brought, I understand, a considerable dowry?"
+
+"A fair dowry. Not more than is usual in my family."
+
+"And this, of course, remains to you, since the marriage is a
+fait accompli?"
+
+"I really have made no inquiries on the subject."
+
+"Very naturally not. Did you see Miss Doran on the day before the
+wedding?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"Was she in good spirits?"
+
+"Never better. She kept talking of what we should do in our
+future lives."
+
+"Indeed! That is very interesting. And on the morning of the
+wedding?"
+
+"She was as bright as possible--at least until after the
+ceremony."
+
+"And did you observe any change in her then?"
+
+"Well, to tell the truth, I saw then the first signs that I had
+ever seen that her temper was just a little sharp. The incident
+however, was too trivial to relate and can have no possible
+bearing upon the case."
+
+"Pray let us have it, for all that."
+
+"Oh, it is childish. She dropped her bouquet as we went towards
+the vestry. She was passing the front pew at the time, and it
+fell over into the pew. There was a moment's delay, but the
+gentleman in the pew handed it up to her again, and it did not
+appear to be the worse for the fall. Yet when I spoke to her of
+the matter, she answered me abruptly; and in the carriage, on our
+way home, she seemed absurdly agitated over this trifling cause."
+
+"Indeed! You say that there was a gentleman in the pew. Some of
+the general public were present, then?"
+
+"Oh, yes. It is impossible to exclude them when the church is
+open."
+
+"This gentleman was not one of your wife's friends?"
+
+"No, no; I call him a gentleman by courtesy, but he was quite a
+common-looking person. I hardly noticed his appearance. But
+really I think that we are wandering rather far from the point."
+
+"Lady St. Simon, then, returned from the wedding in a less
+cheerful frame of mind than she had gone to it. What did she do
+on re-entering her father's house?"
+
+"I saw her in conversation with her maid."
+
+"And who is her maid?"
+
+"Alice is her name. She is an American and came from California
+with her."
+
+"A confidential servant?"
+
+"A little too much so. It seemed to me that her mistress allowed
+her to take great liberties. Still, of course, in America they
+look upon these things in a different way."
+
+"How long did she speak to this Alice?"
+
+"Oh, a few minutes. I had something else to think of."
+
+"You did not overhear what they said?"
+
+"Lady St. Simon said something about 'jumping a claim.' She was
+accustomed to use slang of the kind. I have no idea what she
+meant."
+
+"American slang is very expressive sometimes. And what did your
+wife do when she finished speaking to her maid?"
+
+"She walked into the breakfast-room."
+
+"On your arm?"
+
+"No, alone. She was very independent in little matters like that.
+Then, after we had sat down for ten minutes or so, she rose
+hurriedly, muttered some words of apology, and left the room. She
+never came back."
+
+"But this maid, Alice, as I understand, deposes that she went to
+her room, covered her bride's dress with a long ulster, put on a
+bonnet, and went out."
+
+"Quite so. And she was afterwards seen walking into Hyde Park in
+company with Flora Millar, a woman who is now in custody, and who
+had already made a disturbance at Mr. Doran's house that
+morning."
+
+"Ah, yes. I should like a few particulars as to this young lady,
+and your relations to her."
+
+Lord St. Simon shrugged his shoulders and raised his eyebrows.
+"We have been on a friendly footing for some years--I may say on
+a very friendly footing. She used to be at the Allegro. I have
+not treated her ungenerously, and she had no just cause of
+complaint against me, but you know what women are, Mr. Holmes.
+Flora was a dear little thing, but exceedingly hot-headed and
+devotedly attached to me. She wrote me dreadful letters when she
+heard that I was about to be married, and, to tell the truth, the
+reason why I had the marriage celebrated so quietly was that I
+feared lest there might be a scandal in the church. She came to
+Mr. Doran's door just after we returned, and she endeavoured to
+push her way in, uttering very abusive expressions towards my
+wife, and even threatening her, but I had foreseen the
+possibility of something of the sort, and I had two police
+fellows there in private clothes, who soon pushed her out again.
+She was quiet when she saw that there was no good in making a
+row."
+
+"Did your wife hear all this?"
+
+"No, thank goodness, she did not."
+
+"And she was seen walking with this very woman afterwards?"
+
+"Yes. That is what Mr. Lestrade, of Scotland Yard, looks upon as
+so serious. It is thought that Flora decoyed my wife out and laid
+some terrible trap for her."
+
+"Well, it is a possible supposition."
+
+"You think so, too?"
+
+"I did not say a probable one. But you do not yourself look upon
+this as likely?"
+
+"I do not think Flora would hurt a fly."
+
+"Still, jealousy is a strange transformer of characters. Pray
+what is your own theory as to what took place?"
+
+"Well, really, I came to seek a theory, not to propound one. I
+have given you all the facts. Since you ask me, however, I may
+say that it has occurred to me as possible that the excitement of
+this affair, the consciousness that she had made so immense a
+social stride, had the effect of causing some little nervous
+disturbance in my wife."
+
+"In short, that she had become suddenly deranged?"
+
+"Well, really, when I consider that she has turned her back--I
+will not say upon me, but upon so much that many have aspired to
+without success--I can hardly explain it in any other fashion."
+
+"Well, certainly that is also a conceivable hypothesis," said
+Holmes, smiling. "And now, Lord St. Simon, I think that I have
+nearly all my data. May I ask whether you were seated at the
+breakfast-table so that you could see out of the window?"
+
+"We could see the other side of the road and the Park."
+
+"Quite so. Then I do not think that I need to detain you longer.
+I shall communicate with you."
+
+"Should you be fortunate enough to solve this problem," said our
+client, rising.
+
+"I have solved it."
+
+"Eh? What was that?"
+
+"I say that I have solved it."
+
+"Where, then, is my wife?"
+
+"That is a detail which I shall speedily supply."
+
+Lord St. Simon shook his head. "I am afraid that it will take
+wiser heads than yours or mine," he remarked, and bowing in a
+stately, old-fashioned manner he departed.
+
+"It is very good of Lord St. Simon to honour my head by putting
+it on a level with his own," said Sherlock Holmes, laughing. "I
+think that I shall have a whisky and soda and a cigar after all
+this cross-questioning. I had formed my conclusions as to the
+case before our client came into the room."
+
+"My dear Holmes!"
+
+"I have notes of several similar cases, though none, as I
+remarked before, which were quite as prompt. My whole examination
+served to turn my conjecture into a certainty. Circumstantial
+evidence is occasionally very convincing, as when you find a
+trout in the milk, to quote Thoreau's example."
+
+"But I have heard all that you have heard."
+
+"Without, however, the knowledge of pre-existing cases which
+serves me so well. There was a parallel instance in Aberdeen some
+years back, and something on very much the same lines at Munich
+the year after the Franco-Prussian War. It is one of these
+cases--but, hullo, here is Lestrade! Good-afternoon, Lestrade!
+You will find an extra tumbler upon the sideboard, and there are
+cigars in the box."
+
+The official detective was attired in a pea-jacket and cravat,
+which gave him a decidedly nautical appearance, and he carried a
+black canvas bag in his hand. With a short greeting he seated
+himself and lit the cigar which had been offered to him.
+
+"What's up, then?" asked Holmes with a twinkle in his eye. "You
+look dissatisfied."
+
+"And I feel dissatisfied. It is this infernal St. Simon marriage
+case. I can make neither head nor tail of the business."
+
+"Really! You surprise me."
+
+"Who ever heard of such a mixed affair? Every clue seems to slip
+through my fingers. I have been at work upon it all day."
+
+"And very wet it seems to have made you," said Holmes laying his
+hand upon the arm of the pea-jacket.
+
+"Yes, I have been dragging the Serpentine."
+
+"In heaven's name, what for?"
+
+"In search of the body of Lady St. Simon."
+
+Sherlock Holmes leaned back in his chair and laughed heartily.
+
+"Have you dragged the basin of Trafalgar Square fountain?" he
+asked.
+
+"Why? What do you mean?"
+
+"Because you have just as good a chance of finding this lady in
+the one as in the other."
+
+Lestrade shot an angry glance at my companion. "I suppose you
+know all about it," he snarled.
+
+"Well, I have only just heard the facts, but my mind is made up."
+
+"Oh, indeed! Then you think that the Serpentine plays no part in
+the matter?"
+
+"I think it very unlikely."
+
+"Then perhaps you will kindly explain how it is that we found
+this in it?" He opened his bag as he spoke, and tumbled onto the
+floor a wedding-dress of watered silk, a pair of white satin
+shoes and a bride's wreath and veil, all discoloured and soaked
+in water. "There," said he, putting a new wedding-ring upon the
+top of the pile. "There is a little nut for you to crack, Master
+Holmes."
+
+"Oh, indeed!" said my friend, blowing blue rings into the air.
+"You dragged them from the Serpentine?"
+
+"No. They were found floating near the margin by a park-keeper.
+They have been identified as her clothes, and it seemed to me
+that if the clothes were there the body would not be far off."
+
+"By the same brilliant reasoning, every man's body is to be found
+in the neighbourhood of his wardrobe. And pray what did you hope
+to arrive at through this?"
+
+"At some evidence implicating Flora Millar in the disappearance."
+
+"I am afraid that you will find it difficult."
+
+"Are you, indeed, now?" cried Lestrade with some bitterness. "I
+am afraid, Holmes, that you are not very practical with your
+deductions and your inferences. You have made two blunders in as
+many minutes. This dress does implicate Miss Flora Millar."
+
+"And how?"
+
+"In the dress is a pocket. In the pocket is a card-case. In the
+card-case is a note. And here is the very note." He slapped it
+down upon the table in front of him. "Listen to this: 'You will
+see me when all is ready. Come at once. F.H.M.' Now my theory all
+along has been that Lady St. Simon was decoyed away by Flora
+Millar, and that she, with confederates, no doubt, was
+responsible for her disappearance. Here, signed with her
+initials, is the very note which was no doubt quietly slipped
+into her hand at the door and which lured her within their
+reach."
+
+"Very good, Lestrade," said Holmes, laughing. "You really are
+very fine indeed. Let me see it." He took up the paper in a
+listless way, but his attention instantly became riveted, and he
+gave a little cry of satisfaction. "This is indeed important,"
+said he.
+
+"Ha! you find it so?"
+
+"Extremely so. I congratulate you warmly."
+
+Lestrade rose in his triumph and bent his head to look. "Why," he
+shrieked, "you're looking at the wrong side!"
+
+"On the contrary, this is the right side."
+
+"The right side? You're mad! Here is the note written in pencil
+over here."
+
+"And over here is what appears to be the fragment of a hotel
+bill, which interests me deeply."
+
+"There's nothing in it. I looked at it before," said Lestrade.
+"'Oct. 4th, rooms 8s., breakfast 2s. 6d., cocktail 1s., lunch 2s.
+6d., glass sherry, 8d.' I see nothing in that."
+
+"Very likely not. It is most important, all the same. As to the
+note, it is important also, or at least the initials are, so I
+congratulate you again."
+
+"I've wasted time enough," said Lestrade, rising. "I believe in
+hard work and not in sitting by the fire spinning fine theories.
+Good-day, Mr. Holmes, and we shall see which gets to the bottom
+of the matter first." He gathered up the garments, thrust them
+into the bag, and made for the door.
+
+"Just one hint to you, Lestrade," drawled Holmes before his rival
+vanished; "I will tell you the true solution of the matter. Lady
+St. Simon is a myth. There is not, and there never has been, any
+such person."
+
+Lestrade looked sadly at my companion. Then he turned to me,
+tapped his forehead three times, shook his head solemnly, and
+hurried away.
+
+He had hardly shut the door behind him when Holmes rose to put on
+his overcoat. "There is something in what the fellow says about
+outdoor work," he remarked, "so I think, Watson, that I must
+leave you to your papers for a little."
+
+It was after five o'clock when Sherlock Holmes left me, but I had
+no time to be lonely, for within an hour there arrived a
+confectioner's man with a very large flat box. This he unpacked
+with the help of a youth whom he had brought with him, and
+presently, to my very great astonishment, a quite epicurean
+little cold supper began to be laid out upon our humble
+lodging-house mahogany. There were a couple of brace of cold
+woodcock, a pheasant, a pâté de foie gras pie with a group of
+ancient and cobwebby bottles. Having laid out all these luxuries,
+my two visitors vanished away, like the genii of the Arabian
+Nights, with no explanation save that the things had been paid
+for and were ordered to this address.
+
+Just before nine o'clock Sherlock Holmes stepped briskly into the
+room. His features were gravely set, but there was a light in his
+eye which made me think that he had not been disappointed in his
+conclusions.
+
+"They have laid the supper, then," he said, rubbing his hands.
+
+"You seem to expect company. They have laid for five."
+
+"Yes, I fancy we may have some company dropping in," said he. "I
+am surprised that Lord St. Simon has not already arrived. Ha! I
+fancy that I hear his step now upon the stairs."
+
+It was indeed our visitor of the afternoon who came bustling in,
+dangling his glasses more vigorously than ever, and with a very
+perturbed expression upon his aristocratic features.
+
+"My messenger reached you, then?" asked Holmes.
+
+"Yes, and I confess that the contents startled me beyond measure.
+Have you good authority for what you say?"
+
+"The best possible."
+
+Lord St. Simon sank into a chair and passed his hand over his
+forehead.
+
+"What will the Duke say," he murmured, "when he hears that one of
+the family has been subjected to such humiliation?"
+
+"It is the purest accident. I cannot allow that there is any
+humiliation."
+
+"Ah, you look on these things from another standpoint."
+
+"I fail to see that anyone is to blame. I can hardly see how the
+lady could have acted otherwise, though her abrupt method of
+doing it was undoubtedly to be regretted. Having no mother, she
+had no one to advise her at such a crisis."
+
+"It was a slight, sir, a public slight," said Lord St. Simon,
+tapping his fingers upon the table.
+
+"You must make allowance for this poor girl, placed in so
+unprecedented a position."
+
+"I will make no allowance. I am very angry indeed, and I have
+been shamefully used."
+
+"I think that I heard a ring," said Holmes. "Yes, there are steps
+on the landing. If I cannot persuade you to take a lenient view
+of the matter, Lord St. Simon, I have brought an advocate here
+who may be more successful." He opened the door and ushered in a
+lady and gentleman. "Lord St. Simon," said he "allow me to
+introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. Francis Hay Moulton. The lady, I
+think, you have already met."
+
+At the sight of these newcomers our client had sprung from his
+seat and stood very erect, with his eyes cast down and his hand
+thrust into the breast of his frock-coat, a picture of offended
+dignity. The lady had taken a quick step forward and had held out
+her hand to him, but he still refused to raise his eyes. It was
+as well for his resolution, perhaps, for her pleading face was
+one which it was hard to resist.
+
+"You're angry, Robert," said she. "Well, I guess you have every
+cause to be."
+
+"Pray make no apology to me," said Lord St. Simon bitterly.
+
+"Oh, yes, I know that I have treated you real bad and that I
+should have spoken to you before I went; but I was kind of
+rattled, and from the time when I saw Frank here again I just
+didn't know what I was doing or saying. I only wonder I didn't
+fall down and do a faint right there before the altar."
+
+"Perhaps, Mrs. Moulton, you would like my friend and me to leave
+the room while you explain this matter?"
+
+"If I may give an opinion," remarked the strange gentleman,
+"we've had just a little too much secrecy over this business
+already. For my part, I should like all Europe and America to
+hear the rights of it." He was a small, wiry, sunburnt man,
+clean-shaven, with a sharp face and alert manner.
+
+"Then I'll tell our story right away," said the lady. "Frank here
+and I met in '84, in McQuire's camp, near the Rockies, where pa
+was working a claim. We were engaged to each other, Frank and I;
+but then one day father struck a rich pocket and made a pile,
+while poor Frank here had a claim that petered out and came to
+nothing. The richer pa grew the poorer was Frank; so at last pa
+wouldn't hear of our engagement lasting any longer, and he took
+me away to 'Frisco. Frank wouldn't throw up his hand, though; so
+he followed me there, and he saw me without pa knowing anything
+about it. It would only have made him mad to know, so we just
+fixed it all up for ourselves. Frank said that he would go and
+make his pile, too, and never come back to claim me until he had
+as much as pa. So then I promised to wait for him to the end of
+time and pledged myself not to marry anyone else while he lived.
+'Why shouldn't we be married right away, then,' said he, 'and
+then I will feel sure of you; and I won't claim to be your
+husband until I come back?' Well, we talked it over, and he had
+fixed it all up so nicely, with a clergyman all ready in waiting,
+that we just did it right there; and then Frank went off to seek
+his fortune, and I went back to pa.
+
+"The next I heard of Frank was that he was in Montana, and then
+he went prospecting in Arizona, and then I heard of him from New
+Mexico. After that came a long newspaper story about how a
+miners' camp had been attacked by Apache Indians, and there was
+my Frank's name among the killed. I fainted dead away, and I was
+very sick for months after. Pa thought I had a decline and took
+me to half the doctors in 'Frisco. Not a word of news came for a
+year and more, so that I never doubted that Frank was really
+dead. Then Lord St. Simon came to 'Frisco, and we came to London,
+and a marriage was arranged, and pa was very pleased, but I felt
+all the time that no man on this earth would ever take the place
+in my heart that had been given to my poor Frank.
+
+"Still, if I had married Lord St. Simon, of course I'd have done
+my duty by him. We can't command our love, but we can our
+actions. I went to the altar with him with the intention to make
+him just as good a wife as it was in me to be. But you may
+imagine what I felt when, just as I came to the altar rails, I
+glanced back and saw Frank standing and looking at me out of the
+first pew. I thought it was his ghost at first; but when I looked
+again there he was still, with a kind of question in his eyes, as
+if to ask me whether I were glad or sorry to see him. I wonder I
+didn't drop. I know that everything was turning round, and the
+words of the clergyman were just like the buzz of a bee in my
+ear. I didn't know what to do. Should I stop the service and make
+a scene in the church? I glanced at him again, and he seemed to
+know what I was thinking, for he raised his finger to his lips to
+tell me to be still. Then I saw him scribble on a piece of paper,
+and I knew that he was writing me a note. As I passed his pew on
+the way out I dropped my bouquet over to him, and he slipped the
+note into my hand when he returned me the flowers. It was only a
+line asking me to join him when he made the sign to me to do so.
+Of course I never doubted for a moment that my first duty was now
+to him, and I determined to do just whatever he might direct.
+
+"When I got back I told my maid, who had known him in California,
+and had always been his friend. I ordered her to say nothing, but
+to get a few things packed and my ulster ready. I know I ought to
+have spoken to Lord St. Simon, but it was dreadful hard before
+his mother and all those great people. I just made up my mind to
+run away and explain afterwards. I hadn't been at the table ten
+minutes before I saw Frank out of the window at the other side of
+the road. He beckoned to me and then began walking into the Park.
+I slipped out, put on my things, and followed him. Some woman
+came talking something or other about Lord St. Simon to
+me--seemed to me from the little I heard as if he had a little
+secret of his own before marriage also--but I managed to get away
+from her and soon overtook Frank. We got into a cab together, and
+away we drove to some lodgings he had taken in Gordon Square, and
+that was my true wedding after all those years of waiting. Frank
+had been a prisoner among the Apaches, had escaped, came on to
+'Frisco, found that I had given him up for dead and had gone to
+England, followed me there, and had come upon me at last on the
+very morning of my second wedding."
+
+"I saw it in a paper," explained the American. "It gave the name
+and the church but not where the lady lived."
+
+"Then we had a talk as to what we should do, and Frank was all
+for openness, but I was so ashamed of it all that I felt as if I
+should like to vanish away and never see any of them again--just
+sending a line to pa, perhaps, to show him that I was alive. It
+was awful to me to think of all those lords and ladies sitting
+round that breakfast-table and waiting for me to come back. So
+Frank took my wedding-clothes and things and made a bundle of
+them, so that I should not be traced, and dropped them away
+somewhere where no one could find them. It is likely that we
+should have gone on to Paris to-morrow, only that this good
+gentleman, Mr. Holmes, came round to us this evening, though how
+he found us is more than I can think, and he showed us very
+clearly and kindly that I was wrong and that Frank was right, and
+that we should be putting ourselves in the wrong if we were so
+secret. Then he offered to give us a chance of talking to Lord
+St. Simon alone, and so we came right away round to his rooms at
+once. Now, Robert, you have heard it all, and I am very sorry if
+I have given you pain, and I hope that you do not think very
+meanly of me."
+
+Lord St. Simon had by no means relaxed his rigid attitude, but
+had listened with a frowning brow and a compressed lip to this
+long narrative.
+
+"Excuse me," he said, "but it is not my custom to discuss my most
+intimate personal affairs in this public manner."
+
+"Then you won't forgive me? You won't shake hands before I go?"
+
+"Oh, certainly, if it would give you any pleasure." He put out
+his hand and coldly grasped that which she extended to him.
+
+"I had hoped," suggested Holmes, "that you would have joined us
+in a friendly supper."
+
+"I think that there you ask a little too much," responded his
+Lordship. "I may be forced to acquiesce in these recent
+developments, but I can hardly be expected to make merry over
+them. I think that with your permission I will now wish you all a
+very good-night." He included us all in a sweeping bow and
+stalked out of the room.
+
+"Then I trust that you at least will honour me with your
+company," said Sherlock Holmes. "It is always a joy to meet an
+American, Mr. Moulton, for I am one of those who believe that the
+folly of a monarch and the blundering of a minister in far-gone
+years will not prevent our children from being some day citizens
+of the same world-wide country under a flag which shall be a
+quartering of the Union Jack with the Stars and Stripes."
+
+"The case has been an interesting one," remarked Holmes when our
+visitors had left us, "because it serves to show very clearly how
+simple the explanation may be of an affair which at first sight
+seems to be almost inexplicable. Nothing could be more natural
+than the sequence of events as narrated by this lady, and nothing
+stranger than the result when viewed, for instance, by Mr.
+Lestrade of Scotland Yard."
+
+"You were not yourself at fault at all, then?"
+
+"From the first, two facts were very obvious to me, the one that
+the lady had been quite willing to undergo the wedding ceremony,
+the other that she had repented of it within a few minutes of
+returning home. Obviously something had occurred during the
+morning, then, to cause her to change her mind. What could that
+something be? She could not have spoken to anyone when she was
+out, for she had been in the company of the bridegroom. Had she
+seen someone, then? If she had, it must be someone from America
+because she had spent so short a time in this country that she
+could hardly have allowed anyone to acquire so deep an influence
+over her that the mere sight of him would induce her to change
+her plans so completely. You see we have already arrived, by a
+process of exclusion, at the idea that she might have seen an
+American. Then who could this American be, and why should he
+possess so much influence over her? It might be a lover; it might
+be a husband. Her young womanhood had, I knew, been spent in
+rough scenes and under strange conditions. So far I had got
+before I ever heard Lord St. Simon's narrative. When he told us
+of a man in a pew, of the change in the bride's manner, of so
+transparent a device for obtaining a note as the dropping of a
+bouquet, of her resort to her confidential maid, and of her very
+significant allusion to claim-jumping--which in miners' parlance
+means taking possession of that which another person has a prior
+claim to--the whole situation became absolutely clear. She had
+gone off with a man, and the man was either a lover or was a
+previous husband--the chances being in favour of the latter."
+
+"And how in the world did you find them?"
+
+"It might have been difficult, but friend Lestrade held
+information in his hands the value of which he did not himself
+know. The initials were, of course, of the highest importance,
+but more valuable still was it to know that within a week he had
+settled his bill at one of the most select London hotels."
+
+"How did you deduce the select?"
+
+"By the select prices. Eight shillings for a bed and eightpence
+for a glass of sherry pointed to one of the most expensive
+hotels. There are not many in London which charge at that rate.
+In the second one which I visited in Northumberland Avenue, I
+learned by an inspection of the book that Francis H. Moulton, an
+American gentleman, had left only the day before, and on looking
+over the entries against him, I came upon the very items which I
+had seen in the duplicate bill. His letters were to be forwarded
+to 226 Gordon Square; so thither I travelled, and being fortunate
+enough to find the loving couple at home, I ventured to give them
+some paternal advice and to point out to them that it would be
+better in every way that they should make their position a little
+clearer both to the general public and to Lord St. Simon in
+particular. I invited them to meet him here, and, as you see, I
+made him keep the appointment."
+
+"But with no very good result," I remarked. "His conduct was
+certainly not very gracious."
+
+"Ah, Watson," said Holmes, smiling, "perhaps you would not be
+very gracious either, if, after all the trouble of wooing and
+wedding, you found yourself deprived in an instant of wife and of
+fortune. I think that we may judge Lord St. Simon very mercifully
+and thank our stars that we are never likely to find ourselves in
+the same position. Draw your chair up and hand me my violin, for
+the only problem we have still to solve is how to while away
+these bleak autumnal evenings."
+
+
+
+XI. THE ADVENTURE OF THE BERYL CORONET
+
+"Holmes," said I as I stood one morning in our bow-window looking
+down the street, "here is a madman coming along. It seems rather
+sad that his relatives should allow him to come out alone."
+
+My friend rose lazily from his armchair and stood with his hands
+in the pockets of his dressing-gown, looking over my shoulder. It
+was a bright, crisp February morning, and the snow of the day
+before still lay deep upon the ground, shimmering brightly in the
+wintry sun. Down the centre of Baker Street it had been ploughed
+into a brown crumbly band by the traffic, but at either side and
+on the heaped-up edges of the foot-paths it still lay as white as
+when it fell. The grey pavement had been cleaned and scraped, but
+was still dangerously slippery, so that there were fewer
+passengers than usual. Indeed, from the direction of the
+Metropolitan Station no one was coming save the single gentleman
+whose eccentric conduct had drawn my attention.
+
+He was a man of about fifty, tall, portly, and imposing, with a
+massive, strongly marked face and a commanding figure. He was
+dressed in a sombre yet rich style, in black frock-coat, shining
+hat, neat brown gaiters, and well-cut pearl-grey trousers. Yet
+his actions were in absurd contrast to the dignity of his dress
+and features, for he was running hard, with occasional little
+springs, such as a weary man gives who is little accustomed to
+set any tax upon his legs. As he ran he jerked his hands up and
+down, waggled his head, and writhed his face into the most
+extraordinary contortions.
+
+"What on earth can be the matter with him?" I asked. "He is
+looking up at the numbers of the houses."
+
+"I believe that he is coming here," said Holmes, rubbing his
+hands.
+
+"Here?"
+
+"Yes; I rather think he is coming to consult me professionally. I
+think that I recognise the symptoms. Ha! did I not tell you?" As
+he spoke, the man, puffing and blowing, rushed at our door and
+pulled at our bell until the whole house resounded with the
+clanging.
+
+A few moments later he was in our room, still puffing, still
+gesticulating, but with so fixed a look of grief and despair in
+his eyes that our smiles were turned in an instant to horror and
+pity. For a while he could not get his words out, but swayed his
+body and plucked at his hair like one who has been driven to the
+extreme limits of his reason. Then, suddenly springing to his
+feet, he beat his head against the wall with such force that we
+both rushed upon him and tore him away to the centre of the room.
+Sherlock Holmes pushed him down into the easy-chair and, sitting
+beside him, patted his hand and chatted with him in the easy,
+soothing tones which he knew so well how to employ.
+
+"You have come to me to tell your story, have you not?" said he.
+"You are fatigued with your haste. Pray wait until you have
+recovered yourself, and then I shall be most happy to look into
+any little problem which you may submit to me."
+
+The man sat for a minute or more with a heaving chest, fighting
+against his emotion. Then he passed his handkerchief over his
+brow, set his lips tight, and turned his face towards us.
+
+"No doubt you think me mad?" said he.
+
+"I see that you have had some great trouble," responded Holmes.
+
+"God knows I have!--a trouble which is enough to unseat my
+reason, so sudden and so terrible is it. Public disgrace I might
+have faced, although I am a man whose character has never yet
+borne a stain. Private affliction also is the lot of every man;
+but the two coming together, and in so frightful a form, have
+been enough to shake my very soul. Besides, it is not I alone.
+The very noblest in the land may suffer unless some way be found
+out of this horrible affair."
+
+"Pray compose yourself, sir," said Holmes, "and let me have a
+clear account of who you are and what it is that has befallen
+you."
+
+"My name," answered our visitor, "is probably familiar to your
+ears. I am Alexander Holder, of the banking firm of Holder &
+Stevenson, of Threadneedle Street."
+
+The name was indeed well known to us as belonging to the senior
+partner in the second largest private banking concern in the City
+of London. What could have happened, then, to bring one of the
+foremost citizens of London to this most pitiable pass? We
+waited, all curiosity, until with another effort he braced
+himself to tell his story.
+
+"I feel that time is of value," said he; "that is why I hastened
+here when the police inspector suggested that I should secure
+your co-operation. I came to Baker Street by the Underground and
+hurried from there on foot, for the cabs go slowly through this
+snow. That is why I was so out of breath, for I am a man who
+takes very little exercise. I feel better now, and I will put the
+facts before you as shortly and yet as clearly as I can.
+
+"It is, of course, well known to you that in a successful banking
+business as much depends upon our being able to find remunerative
+investments for our funds as upon our increasing our connection
+and the number of our depositors. One of our most lucrative means
+of laying out money is in the shape of loans, where the security
+is unimpeachable. We have done a good deal in this direction
+during the last few years, and there are many noble families to
+whom we have advanced large sums upon the security of their
+pictures, libraries, or plate.
+
+"Yesterday morning I was seated in my office at the bank when a
+card was brought in to me by one of the clerks. I started when I
+saw the name, for it was that of none other than--well, perhaps
+even to you I had better say no more than that it was a name
+which is a household word all over the earth--one of the highest,
+noblest, most exalted names in England. I was overwhelmed by the
+honour and attempted, when he entered, to say so, but he plunged
+at once into business with the air of a man who wishes to hurry
+quickly through a disagreeable task.
+
+"'Mr. Holder,' said he, 'I have been informed that you are in the
+habit of advancing money.'
+
+"'The firm does so when the security is good.' I answered.
+
+"'It is absolutely essential to me,' said he, 'that I should have
+50,000 pounds at once. I could, of course, borrow so trifling a
+sum ten times over from my friends, but I much prefer to make it
+a matter of business and to carry out that business myself. In my
+position you can readily understand that it is unwise to place
+one's self under obligations.'
+
+"'For how long, may I ask, do you want this sum?' I asked.
+
+"'Next Monday I have a large sum due to me, and I shall then most
+certainly repay what you advance, with whatever interest you
+think it right to charge. But it is very essential to me that the
+money should be paid at once.'
+
+"'I should be happy to advance it without further parley from my
+own private purse,' said I, 'were it not that the strain would be
+rather more than it could bear. If, on the other hand, I am to do
+it in the name of the firm, then in justice to my partner I must
+insist that, even in your case, every businesslike precaution
+should be taken.'
+
+"'I should much prefer to have it so,' said he, raising up a
+square, black morocco case which he had laid beside his chair.
+'You have doubtless heard of the Beryl Coronet?'
+
+"'One of the most precious public possessions of the empire,'
+said I.
+
+"'Precisely.' He opened the case, and there, imbedded in soft,
+flesh-coloured velvet, lay the magnificent piece of jewellery
+which he had named. 'There are thirty-nine enormous beryls,' said
+he, 'and the price of the gold chasing is incalculable. The
+lowest estimate would put the worth of the coronet at double the
+sum which I have asked. I am prepared to leave it with you as my
+security.'
+
+"I took the precious case into my hands and looked in some
+perplexity from it to my illustrious client.
+
+"'You doubt its value?' he asked.
+
+"'Not at all. I only doubt--'
+
+"'The propriety of my leaving it. You may set your mind at rest
+about that. I should not dream of doing so were it not absolutely
+certain that I should be able in four days to reclaim it. It is a
+pure matter of form. Is the security sufficient?'
+
+"'Ample.'
+
+"'You understand, Mr. Holder, that I am giving you a strong proof
+of the confidence which I have in you, founded upon all that I
+have heard of you. I rely upon you not only to be discreet and to
+refrain from all gossip upon the matter but, above all, to
+preserve this coronet with every possible precaution because I
+need not say that a great public scandal would be caused if any
+harm were to befall it. Any injury to it would be almost as
+serious as its complete loss, for there are no beryls in the
+world to match these, and it would be impossible to replace them.
+I leave it with you, however, with every confidence, and I shall
+call for it in person on Monday morning.'
+
+"Seeing that my client was anxious to leave, I said no more but,
+calling for my cashier, I ordered him to pay over fifty 1000
+pound notes. When I was alone once more, however, with the
+precious case lying upon the table in front of me, I could not
+but think with some misgivings of the immense responsibility
+which it entailed upon me. There could be no doubt that, as it
+was a national possession, a horrible scandal would ensue if any
+misfortune should occur to it. I already regretted having ever
+consented to take charge of it. However, it was too late to alter
+the matter now, so I locked it up in my private safe and turned
+once more to my work.
+
+"When evening came I felt that it would be an imprudence to leave
+so precious a thing in the office behind me. Bankers' safes had
+been forced before now, and why should not mine be? If so, how
+terrible would be the position in which I should find myself! I
+determined, therefore, that for the next few days I would always
+carry the case backward and forward with me, so that it might
+never be really out of my reach. With this intention, I called a
+cab and drove out to my house at Streatham, carrying the jewel
+with me. I did not breathe freely until I had taken it upstairs
+and locked it in the bureau of my dressing-room.
+
+"And now a word as to my household, Mr. Holmes, for I wish you to
+thoroughly understand the situation. My groom and my page sleep
+out of the house, and may be set aside altogether. I have three
+maid-servants who have been with me a number of years and whose
+absolute reliability is quite above suspicion. Another, Lucy
+Parr, the second waiting-maid, has only been in my service a few
+months. She came with an excellent character, however, and has
+always given me satisfaction. She is a very pretty girl and has
+attracted admirers who have occasionally hung about the place.
+That is the only drawback which we have found to her, but we
+believe her to be a thoroughly good girl in every way.
+
+"So much for the servants. My family itself is so small that it
+will not take me long to describe it. I am a widower and have an
+only son, Arthur. He has been a disappointment to me, Mr.
+Holmes--a grievous disappointment. I have no doubt that I am
+myself to blame. People tell me that I have spoiled him. Very
+likely I have. When my dear wife died I felt that he was all I
+had to love. I could not bear to see the smile fade even for a
+moment from his face. I have never denied him a wish. Perhaps it
+would have been better for both of us had I been sterner, but I
+meant it for the best.
+
+"It was naturally my intention that he should succeed me in my
+business, but he was not of a business turn. He was wild,
+wayward, and, to speak the truth, I could not trust him in the
+handling of large sums of money. When he was young he became a
+member of an aristocratic club, and there, having charming
+manners, he was soon the intimate of a number of men with long
+purses and expensive habits. He learned to play heavily at cards
+and to squander money on the turf, until he had again and again
+to come to me and implore me to give him an advance upon his
+allowance, that he might settle his debts of honour. He tried
+more than once to break away from the dangerous company which he
+was keeping, but each time the influence of his friend, Sir
+George Burnwell, was enough to draw him back again.
+
+"And, indeed, I could not wonder that such a man as Sir George
+Burnwell should gain an influence over him, for he has frequently
+brought him to my house, and I have found myself that I could
+hardly resist the fascination of his manner. He is older than
+Arthur, a man of the world to his finger-tips, one who had been
+everywhere, seen everything, a brilliant talker, and a man of
+great personal beauty. Yet when I think of him in cold blood, far
+away from the glamour of his presence, I am convinced from his
+cynical speech and the look which I have caught in his eyes that
+he is one who should be deeply distrusted. So I think, and so,
+too, thinks my little Mary, who has a woman's quick insight into
+character.
+
+"And now there is only she to be described. She is my niece; but
+when my brother died five years ago and left her alone in the
+world I adopted her, and have looked upon her ever since as my
+daughter. She is a sunbeam in my house--sweet, loving, beautiful,
+a wonderful manager and housekeeper, yet as tender and quiet and
+gentle as a woman could be. She is my right hand. I do not know
+what I could do without her. In only one matter has she ever gone
+against my wishes. Twice my boy has asked her to marry him, for
+he loves her devotedly, but each time she has refused him. I
+think that if anyone could have drawn him into the right path it
+would have been she, and that his marriage might have changed his
+whole life; but now, alas! it is too late--forever too late!
+
+"Now, Mr. Holmes, you know the people who live under my roof, and
+I shall continue with my miserable story.
+
+"When we were taking coffee in the drawing-room that night after
+dinner, I told Arthur and Mary my experience, and of the precious
+treasure which we had under our roof, suppressing only the name
+of my client. Lucy Parr, who had brought in the coffee, had, I am
+sure, left the room; but I cannot swear that the door was closed.
+Mary and Arthur were much interested and wished to see the famous
+coronet, but I thought it better not to disturb it.
+
+"'Where have you put it?' asked Arthur.
+
+"'In my own bureau.'
+
+"'Well, I hope to goodness the house won't be burgled during the
+night.' said he.
+
+"'It is locked up,' I answered.
+
+"'Oh, any old key will fit that bureau. When I was a youngster I
+have opened it myself with the key of the box-room cupboard.'
+
+"He often had a wild way of talking, so that I thought little of
+what he said. He followed me to my room, however, that night with
+a very grave face.
+
+"'Look here, dad,' said he with his eyes cast down, 'can you let
+me have 200 pounds?'
+
+"'No, I cannot!' I answered sharply. 'I have been far too
+generous with you in money matters.'
+
+"'You have been very kind,' said he, 'but I must have this money,
+or else I can never show my face inside the club again.'
+
+"'And a very good thing, too!' I cried.
+
+"'Yes, but you would not have me leave it a dishonoured man,'
+said he. 'I could not bear the disgrace. I must raise the money
+in some way, and if you will not let me have it, then I must try
+other means.'
+
+"I was very angry, for this was the third demand during the
+month. 'You shall not have a farthing from me,' I cried, on which
+he bowed and left the room without another word.
+
+"When he was gone I unlocked my bureau, made sure that my
+treasure was safe, and locked it again. Then I started to go
+round the house to see that all was secure--a duty which I
+usually leave to Mary but which I thought it well to perform
+myself that night. As I came down the stairs I saw Mary herself
+at the side window of the hall, which she closed and fastened as
+I approached.
+
+"'Tell me, dad,' said she, looking, I thought, a little
+disturbed, 'did you give Lucy, the maid, leave to go out
+to-night?'
+
+"'Certainly not.'
+
+"'She came in just now by the back door. I have no doubt that she
+has only been to the side gate to see someone, but I think that
+it is hardly safe and should be stopped.'
+
+"'You must speak to her in the morning, or I will if you prefer
+it. Are you sure that everything is fastened?'
+
+"'Quite sure, dad.'
+
+"'Then, good-night.' I kissed her and went up to my bedroom
+again, where I was soon asleep.
+
+"I am endeavouring to tell you everything, Mr. Holmes, which may
+have any bearing upon the case, but I beg that you will question
+me upon any point which I do not make clear."
+
+"On the contrary, your statement is singularly lucid."
+
+"I come to a part of my story now in which I should wish to be
+particularly so. I am not a very heavy sleeper, and the anxiety
+in my mind tended, no doubt, to make me even less so than usual.
+About two in the morning, then, I was awakened by some sound in
+the house. It had ceased ere I was wide awake, but it had left an
+impression behind it as though a window had gently closed
+somewhere. I lay listening with all my ears. Suddenly, to my
+horror, there was a distinct sound of footsteps moving softly in
+the next room. I slipped out of bed, all palpitating with fear,
+and peeped round the corner of my dressing-room door.
+
+"'Arthur!' I screamed, 'you villain! you thief! How dare you
+touch that coronet?'
+
+"The gas was half up, as I had left it, and my unhappy boy,
+dressed only in his shirt and trousers, was standing beside the
+light, holding the coronet in his hands. He appeared to be
+wrenching at it, or bending it with all his strength. At my cry
+he dropped it from his grasp and turned as pale as death. I
+snatched it up and examined it. One of the gold corners, with
+three of the beryls in it, was missing.
+
+"'You blackguard!' I shouted, beside myself with rage. 'You have
+destroyed it! You have dishonoured me forever! Where are the
+jewels which you have stolen?'
+
+"'Stolen!' he cried.
+
+"'Yes, thief!' I roared, shaking him by the shoulder.
+
+"'There are none missing. There cannot be any missing,' said he.
+
+"'There are three missing. And you know where they are. Must I
+call you a liar as well as a thief? Did I not see you trying to
+tear off another piece?'
+
+"'You have called me names enough,' said he, 'I will not stand it
+any longer. I shall not say another word about this business,
+since you have chosen to insult me. I will leave your house in
+the morning and make my own way in the world.'
+
+"'You shall leave it in the hands of the police!' I cried
+half-mad with grief and rage. 'I shall have this matter probed to
+the bottom.'
+
+"'You shall learn nothing from me,' said he with a passion such
+as I should not have thought was in his nature. 'If you choose to
+call the police, let the police find what they can.'
+
+"By this time the whole house was astir, for I had raised my
+voice in my anger. Mary was the first to rush into my room, and,
+at the sight of the coronet and of Arthur's face, she read the
+whole story and, with a scream, fell down senseless on the
+ground. I sent the house-maid for the police and put the
+investigation into their hands at once. When the inspector and a
+constable entered the house, Arthur, who had stood sullenly with
+his arms folded, asked me whether it was my intention to charge
+him with theft. I answered that it had ceased to be a private
+matter, but had become a public one, since the ruined coronet was
+national property. I was determined that the law should have its
+way in everything.
+
+"'At least,' said he, 'you will not have me arrested at once. It
+would be to your advantage as well as mine if I might leave the
+house for five minutes.'
+
+"'That you may get away, or perhaps that you may conceal what you
+have stolen,' said I. And then, realising the dreadful position
+in which I was placed, I implored him to remember that not only
+my honour but that of one who was far greater than I was at
+stake; and that he threatened to raise a scandal which would
+convulse the nation. He might avert it all if he would but tell
+me what he had done with the three missing stones.
+
+"'You may as well face the matter,' said I; 'you have been caught
+in the act, and no confession could make your guilt more heinous.
+If you but make such reparation as is in your power, by telling
+us where the beryls are, all shall be forgiven and forgotten.'
+
+"'Keep your forgiveness for those who ask for it,' he answered,
+turning away from me with a sneer. I saw that he was too hardened
+for any words of mine to influence him. There was but one way for
+it. I called in the inspector and gave him into custody. A search
+was made at once not only of his person but of his room and of
+every portion of the house where he could possibly have concealed
+the gems; but no trace of them could be found, nor would the
+wretched boy open his mouth for all our persuasions and our
+threats. This morning he was removed to a cell, and I, after
+going through all the police formalities, have hurried round to
+you to implore you to use your skill in unravelling the matter.
+The police have openly confessed that they can at present make
+nothing of it. You may go to any expense which you think
+necessary. I have already offered a reward of 1000 pounds. My
+God, what shall I do! I have lost my honour, my gems, and my son
+in one night. Oh, what shall I do!"
+
+He put a hand on either side of his head and rocked himself to
+and fro, droning to himself like a child whose grief has got
+beyond words.
+
+Sherlock Holmes sat silent for some few minutes, with his brows
+knitted and his eyes fixed upon the fire.
+
+"Do you receive much company?" he asked.
+
+"None save my partner with his family and an occasional friend of
+Arthur's. Sir George Burnwell has been several times lately. No
+one else, I think."
+
+"Do you go out much in society?"
+
+"Arthur does. Mary and I stay at home. We neither of us care for
+it."
+
+"That is unusual in a young girl."
+
+"She is of a quiet nature. Besides, she is not so very young. She
+is four-and-twenty."
+
+"This matter, from what you say, seems to have been a shock to
+her also."
+
+"Terrible! She is even more affected than I."
+
+"You have neither of you any doubt as to your son's guilt?"
+
+"How can we have when I saw him with my own eyes with the coronet
+in his hands."
+
+"I hardly consider that a conclusive proof. Was the remainder of
+the coronet at all injured?"
+
+"Yes, it was twisted."
+
+"Do you not think, then, that he might have been trying to
+straighten it?"
+
+"God bless you! You are doing what you can for him and for me.
+But it is too heavy a task. What was he doing there at all? If
+his purpose were innocent, why did he not say so?"
+
+"Precisely. And if it were guilty, why did he not invent a lie?
+His silence appears to me to cut both ways. There are several
+singular points about the case. What did the police think of the
+noise which awoke you from your sleep?"
+
+"They considered that it might be caused by Arthur's closing his
+bedroom door."
+
+"A likely story! As if a man bent on felony would slam his door
+so as to wake a household. What did they say, then, of the
+disappearance of these gems?"
+
+"They are still sounding the planking and probing the furniture
+in the hope of finding them."
+
+"Have they thought of looking outside the house?"
+
+"Yes, they have shown extraordinary energy. The whole garden has
+already been minutely examined."
+
+"Now, my dear sir," said Holmes, "is it not obvious to you now
+that this matter really strikes very much deeper than either you
+or the police were at first inclined to think? It appeared to you
+to be a simple case; to me it seems exceedingly complex. Consider
+what is involved by your theory. You suppose that your son came
+down from his bed, went, at great risk, to your dressing-room,
+opened your bureau, took out your coronet, broke off by main
+force a small portion of it, went off to some other place,
+concealed three gems out of the thirty-nine, with such skill that
+nobody can find them, and then returned with the other thirty-six
+into the room in which he exposed himself to the greatest danger
+of being discovered. I ask you now, is such a theory tenable?"
+
+"But what other is there?" cried the banker with a gesture of
+despair. "If his motives were innocent, why does he not explain
+them?"
+
+"It is our task to find that out," replied Holmes; "so now, if
+you please, Mr. Holder, we will set off for Streatham together,
+and devote an hour to glancing a little more closely into
+details."
+
+My friend insisted upon my accompanying them in their expedition,
+which I was eager enough to do, for my curiosity and sympathy
+were deeply stirred by the story to which we had listened. I
+confess that the guilt of the banker's son appeared to me to be
+as obvious as it did to his unhappy father, but still I had such
+faith in Holmes' judgment that I felt that there must be some
+grounds for hope as long as he was dissatisfied with the accepted
+explanation. He hardly spoke a word the whole way out to the
+southern suburb, but sat with his chin upon his breast and his
+hat drawn over his eyes, sunk in the deepest thought. Our client
+appeared to have taken fresh heart at the little glimpse of hope
+which had been presented to him, and he even broke into a
+desultory chat with me over his business affairs. A short railway
+journey and a shorter walk brought us to Fairbank, the modest
+residence of the great financier.
+
+Fairbank was a good-sized square house of white stone, standing
+back a little from the road. A double carriage-sweep, with a
+snow-clad lawn, stretched down in front to two large iron gates
+which closed the entrance. On the right side was a small wooden
+thicket, which led into a narrow path between two neat hedges
+stretching from the road to the kitchen door, and forming the
+tradesmen's entrance. On the left ran a lane which led to the
+stables, and was not itself within the grounds at all, being a
+public, though little used, thoroughfare. Holmes left us standing
+at the door and walked slowly all round the house, across the
+front, down the tradesmen's path, and so round by the garden
+behind into the stable lane. So long was he that Mr. Holder and I
+went into the dining-room and waited by the fire until he should
+return. We were sitting there in silence when the door opened and
+a young lady came in. She was rather above the middle height,
+slim, with dark hair and eyes, which seemed the darker against
+the absolute pallor of her skin. I do not think that I have ever
+seen such deadly paleness in a woman's face. Her lips, too, were
+bloodless, but her eyes were flushed with crying. As she swept
+silently into the room she impressed me with a greater sense of
+grief than the banker had done in the morning, and it was the
+more striking in her as she was evidently a woman of strong
+character, with immense capacity for self-restraint. Disregarding
+my presence, she went straight to her uncle and passed her hand
+over his head with a sweet womanly caress.
+
+"You have given orders that Arthur should be liberated, have you
+not, dad?" she asked.
+
+"No, no, my girl, the matter must be probed to the bottom."
+
+"But I am so sure that he is innocent. You know what woman's
+instincts are. I know that he has done no harm and that you will
+be sorry for having acted so harshly."
+
+"Why is he silent, then, if he is innocent?"
+
+"Who knows? Perhaps because he was so angry that you should
+suspect him."
+
+"How could I help suspecting him, when I actually saw him with
+the coronet in his hand?"
+
+"Oh, but he had only picked it up to look at it. Oh, do, do take
+my word for it that he is innocent. Let the matter drop and say
+no more. It is so dreadful to think of our dear Arthur in
+prison!"
+
+"I shall never let it drop until the gems are found--never, Mary!
+Your affection for Arthur blinds you as to the awful consequences
+to me. Far from hushing the thing up, I have brought a gentleman
+down from London to inquire more deeply into it."
+
+"This gentleman?" she asked, facing round to me.
+
+"No, his friend. He wished us to leave him alone. He is round in
+the stable lane now."
+
+"The stable lane?" She raised her dark eyebrows. "What can he
+hope to find there? Ah! this, I suppose, is he. I trust, sir,
+that you will succeed in proving, what I feel sure is the truth,
+that my cousin Arthur is innocent of this crime."
+
+"I fully share your opinion, and I trust, with you, that we may
+prove it," returned Holmes, going back to the mat to knock the
+snow from his shoes. "I believe I have the honour of addressing
+Miss Mary Holder. Might I ask you a question or two?"
+
+"Pray do, sir, if it may help to clear this horrible affair up."
+
+"You heard nothing yourself last night?"
+
+"Nothing, until my uncle here began to speak loudly. I heard
+that, and I came down."
+
+"You shut up the windows and doors the night before. Did you
+fasten all the windows?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"Were they all fastened this morning?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"You have a maid who has a sweetheart? I think that you remarked
+to your uncle last night that she had been out to see him?"
+
+"Yes, and she was the girl who waited in the drawing-room, and
+who may have heard uncle's remarks about the coronet."
+
+"I see. You infer that she may have gone out to tell her
+sweetheart, and that the two may have planned the robbery."
+
+"But what is the good of all these vague theories," cried the
+banker impatiently, "when I have told you that I saw Arthur with
+the coronet in his hands?"
+
+"Wait a little, Mr. Holder. We must come back to that. About this
+girl, Miss Holder. You saw her return by the kitchen door, I
+presume?"
+
+"Yes; when I went to see if the door was fastened for the night I
+met her slipping in. I saw the man, too, in the gloom."
+
+"Do you know him?"
+
+"Oh, yes! he is the green-grocer who brings our vegetables round.
+His name is Francis Prosper."
+
+"He stood," said Holmes, "to the left of the door--that is to
+say, farther up the path than is necessary to reach the door?"
+
+"Yes, he did."
+
+"And he is a man with a wooden leg?"
+
+Something like fear sprang up in the young lady's expressive
+black eyes. "Why, you are like a magician," said she. "How do you
+know that?" She smiled, but there was no answering smile in
+Holmes' thin, eager face.
+
+"I should be very glad now to go upstairs," said he. "I shall
+probably wish to go over the outside of the house again. Perhaps
+I had better take a look at the lower windows before I go up."
+
+He walked swiftly round from one to the other, pausing only at
+the large one which looked from the hall onto the stable lane.
+This he opened and made a very careful examination of the sill
+with his powerful magnifying lens. "Now we shall go upstairs,"
+said he at last.
+
+The banker's dressing-room was a plainly furnished little
+chamber, with a grey carpet, a large bureau, and a long mirror.
+Holmes went to the bureau first and looked hard at the lock.
+
+"Which key was used to open it?" he asked.
+
+"That which my son himself indicated--that of the cupboard of the
+lumber-room."
+
+"Have you it here?"
+
+"That is it on the dressing-table."
+
+Sherlock Holmes took it up and opened the bureau.
+
+"It is a noiseless lock," said he. "It is no wonder that it did
+not wake you. This case, I presume, contains the coronet. We must
+have a look at it." He opened the case, and taking out the diadem
+he laid it upon the table. It was a magnificent specimen of the
+jeweller's art, and the thirty-six stones were the finest that I
+have ever seen. At one side of the coronet was a cracked edge,
+where a corner holding three gems had been torn away.
+
+"Now, Mr. Holder," said Holmes, "here is the corner which
+corresponds to that which has been so unfortunately lost. Might I
+beg that you will break it off."
+
+The banker recoiled in horror. "I should not dream of trying,"
+said he.
+
+"Then I will." Holmes suddenly bent his strength upon it, but
+without result. "I feel it give a little," said he; "but, though
+I am exceptionally strong in the fingers, it would take me all my
+time to break it. An ordinary man could not do it. Now, what do
+you think would happen if I did break it, Mr. Holder? There would
+be a noise like a pistol shot. Do you tell me that all this
+happened within a few yards of your bed and that you heard
+nothing of it?"
+
+"I do not know what to think. It is all dark to me."
+
+"But perhaps it may grow lighter as we go. What do you think,
+Miss Holder?"
+
+"I confess that I still share my uncle's perplexity."
+
+"Your son had no shoes or slippers on when you saw him?"
+
+"He had nothing on save only his trousers and shirt."
+
+"Thank you. We have certainly been favoured with extraordinary
+luck during this inquiry, and it will be entirely our own fault
+if we do not succeed in clearing the matter up. With your
+permission, Mr. Holder, I shall now continue my investigations
+outside."
+
+He went alone, at his own request, for he explained that any
+unnecessary footmarks might make his task more difficult. For an
+hour or more he was at work, returning at last with his feet
+heavy with snow and his features as inscrutable as ever.
+
+"I think that I have seen now all that there is to see, Mr.
+Holder," said he; "I can serve you best by returning to my
+rooms."
+
+"But the gems, Mr. Holmes. Where are they?"
+
+"I cannot tell."
+
+The banker wrung his hands. "I shall never see them again!" he
+cried. "And my son? You give me hopes?"
+
+"My opinion is in no way altered."
+
+"Then, for God's sake, what was this dark business which was
+acted in my house last night?"
+
+"If you can call upon me at my Baker Street rooms to-morrow
+morning between nine and ten I shall be happy to do what I can to
+make it clearer. I understand that you give me carte blanche to
+act for you, provided only that I get back the gems, and that you
+place no limit on the sum I may draw."
+
+"I would give my fortune to have them back."
+
+"Very good. I shall look into the matter between this and then.
+Good-bye; it is just possible that I may have to come over here
+again before evening."
+
+It was obvious to me that my companion's mind was now made up
+about the case, although what his conclusions were was more than
+I could even dimly imagine. Several times during our homeward
+journey I endeavoured to sound him upon the point, but he always
+glided away to some other topic, until at last I gave it over in
+despair. It was not yet three when we found ourselves in our
+rooms once more. He hurried to his chamber and was down again in
+a few minutes dressed as a common loafer. With his collar turned
+up, his shiny, seedy coat, his red cravat, and his worn boots, he
+was a perfect sample of the class.
+
+"I think that this should do," said he, glancing into the glass
+above the fireplace. "I only wish that you could come with me,
+Watson, but I fear that it won't do. I may be on the trail in
+this matter, or I may be following a will-o'-the-wisp, but I
+shall soon know which it is. I hope that I may be back in a few
+hours." He cut a slice of beef from the joint upon the sideboard,
+sandwiched it between two rounds of bread, and thrusting this
+rude meal into his pocket he started off upon his expedition.
+
+I had just finished my tea when he returned, evidently in
+excellent spirits, swinging an old elastic-sided boot in his
+hand. He chucked it down into a corner and helped himself to a
+cup of tea.
+
+"I only looked in as I passed," said he. "I am going right on."
+
+"Where to?"
+
+"Oh, to the other side of the West End. It may be some time
+before I get back. Don't wait up for me in case I should be
+late."
+
+"How are you getting on?"
+
+"Oh, so so. Nothing to complain of. I have been out to Streatham
+since I saw you last, but I did not call at the house. It is a
+very sweet little problem, and I would not have missed it for a
+good deal. However, I must not sit gossiping here, but must get
+these disreputable clothes off and return to my highly
+respectable self."
+
+I could see by his manner that he had stronger reasons for
+satisfaction than his words alone would imply. His eyes twinkled,
+and there was even a touch of colour upon his sallow cheeks. He
+hastened upstairs, and a few minutes later I heard the slam of
+the hall door, which told me that he was off once more upon his
+congenial hunt.
+
+I waited until midnight, but there was no sign of his return, so
+I retired to my room. It was no uncommon thing for him to be away
+for days and nights on end when he was hot upon a scent, so that
+his lateness caused me no surprise. I do not know at what hour he
+came in, but when I came down to breakfast in the morning there
+he was with a cup of coffee in one hand and the paper in the
+other, as fresh and trim as possible.
+
+"You will excuse my beginning without you, Watson," said he, "but
+you remember that our client has rather an early appointment this
+morning."
+
+"Why, it is after nine now," I answered. "I should not be
+surprised if that were he. I thought I heard a ring."
+
+It was, indeed, our friend the financier. I was shocked by the
+change which had come over him, for his face which was naturally
+of a broad and massive mould, was now pinched and fallen in,
+while his hair seemed to me at least a shade whiter. He entered
+with a weariness and lethargy which was even more painful than
+his violence of the morning before, and he dropped heavily into
+the armchair which I pushed forward for him.
+
+"I do not know what I have done to be so severely tried," said
+he. "Only two days ago I was a happy and prosperous man, without
+a care in the world. Now I am left to a lonely and dishonoured
+age. One sorrow comes close upon the heels of another. My niece,
+Mary, has deserted me."
+
+"Deserted you?"
+
+"Yes. Her bed this morning had not been slept in, her room was
+empty, and a note for me lay upon the hall table. I had said to
+her last night, in sorrow and not in anger, that if she had
+married my boy all might have been well with him. Perhaps it was
+thoughtless of me to say so. It is to that remark that she refers
+in this note:
+
+"'MY DEAREST UNCLE:--I feel that I have brought trouble upon you,
+and that if I had acted differently this terrible misfortune
+might never have occurred. I cannot, with this thought in my
+mind, ever again be happy under your roof, and I feel that I must
+leave you forever. Do not worry about my future, for that is
+provided for; and, above all, do not search for me, for it will
+be fruitless labour and an ill-service to me. In life or in
+death, I am ever your loving,--MARY.'
+
+"What could she mean by that note, Mr. Holmes? Do you think it
+points to suicide?"
+
+"No, no, nothing of the kind. It is perhaps the best possible
+solution. I trust, Mr. Holder, that you are nearing the end of
+your troubles."
+
+"Ha! You say so! You have heard something, Mr. Holmes; you have
+learned something! Where are the gems?"
+
+"You would not think 1000 pounds apiece an excessive sum for
+them?"
+
+"I would pay ten."
+
+"That would be unnecessary. Three thousand will cover the matter.
+And there is a little reward, I fancy. Have you your check-book?
+Here is a pen. Better make it out for 4000 pounds."
+
+With a dazed face the banker made out the required check. Holmes
+walked over to his desk, took out a little triangular piece of
+gold with three gems in it, and threw it down upon the table.
+
+With a shriek of joy our client clutched it up.
+
+"You have it!" he gasped. "I am saved! I am saved!"
+
+The reaction of joy was as passionate as his grief had been, and
+he hugged his recovered gems to his bosom.
+
+"There is one other thing you owe, Mr. Holder," said Sherlock
+Holmes rather sternly.
+
+"Owe!" He caught up a pen. "Name the sum, and I will pay it."
+
+"No, the debt is not to me. You owe a very humble apology to that
+noble lad, your son, who has carried himself in this matter as I
+should be proud to see my own son do, should I ever chance to
+have one."
+
+"Then it was not Arthur who took them?"
+
+"I told you yesterday, and I repeat to-day, that it was not."
+
+"You are sure of it! Then let us hurry to him at once to let him
+know that the truth is known."
+
+"He knows it already. When I had cleared it all up I had an
+interview with him, and finding that he would not tell me the
+story, I told it to him, on which he had to confess that I was
+right and to add the very few details which were not yet quite
+clear to me. Your news of this morning, however, may open his
+lips."
+
+"For heaven's sake, tell me, then, what is this extraordinary
+mystery!"
+
+"I will do so, and I will show you the steps by which I reached
+it. And let me say to you, first, that which it is hardest for me
+to say and for you to hear: there has been an understanding
+between Sir George Burnwell and your niece Mary. They have now
+fled together."
+
+"My Mary? Impossible!"
+
+"It is unfortunately more than possible; it is certain. Neither
+you nor your son knew the true character of this man when you
+admitted him into your family circle. He is one of the most
+dangerous men in England--a ruined gambler, an absolutely
+desperate villain, a man without heart or conscience. Your niece
+knew nothing of such men. When he breathed his vows to her, as he
+had done to a hundred before her, she flattered herself that she
+alone had touched his heart. The devil knows best what he said,
+but at least she became his tool and was in the habit of seeing
+him nearly every evening."
+
+"I cannot, and I will not, believe it!" cried the banker with an
+ashen face.
+
+"I will tell you, then, what occurred in your house last night.
+Your niece, when you had, as she thought, gone to your room,
+slipped down and talked to her lover through the window which
+leads into the stable lane. His footmarks had pressed right
+through the snow, so long had he stood there. She told him of the
+coronet. His wicked lust for gold kindled at the news, and he
+bent her to his will. I have no doubt that she loved you, but
+there are women in whom the love of a lover extinguishes all
+other loves, and I think that she must have been one. She had
+hardly listened to his instructions when she saw you coming
+downstairs, on which she closed the window rapidly and told you
+about one of the servants' escapade with her wooden-legged lover,
+which was all perfectly true.
+
+"Your boy, Arthur, went to bed after his interview with you but
+he slept badly on account of his uneasiness about his club debts.
+In the middle of the night he heard a soft tread pass his door,
+so he rose and, looking out, was surprised to see his cousin
+walking very stealthily along the passage until she disappeared
+into your dressing-room. Petrified with astonishment, the lad
+slipped on some clothes and waited there in the dark to see what
+would come of this strange affair. Presently she emerged from the
+room again, and in the light of the passage-lamp your son saw
+that she carried the precious coronet in her hands. She passed
+down the stairs, and he, thrilling with horror, ran along and
+slipped behind the curtain near your door, whence he could see
+what passed in the hall beneath. He saw her stealthily open the
+window, hand out the coronet to someone in the gloom, and then
+closing it once more hurry back to her room, passing quite close
+to where he stood hid behind the curtain.
+
+"As long as she was on the scene he could not take any action
+without a horrible exposure of the woman whom he loved. But the
+instant that she was gone he realised how crushing a misfortune
+this would be for you, and how all-important it was to set it
+right. He rushed down, just as he was, in his bare feet, opened
+the window, sprang out into the snow, and ran down the lane,
+where he could see a dark figure in the moonlight. Sir George
+Burnwell tried to get away, but Arthur caught him, and there was
+a struggle between them, your lad tugging at one side of the
+coronet, and his opponent at the other. In the scuffle, your son
+struck Sir George and cut him over the eye. Then something
+suddenly snapped, and your son, finding that he had the coronet
+in his hands, rushed back, closed the window, ascended to your
+room, and had just observed that the coronet had been twisted in
+the struggle and was endeavouring to straighten it when you
+appeared upon the scene."
+
+"Is it possible?" gasped the banker.
+
+"You then roused his anger by calling him names at a moment when
+he felt that he had deserved your warmest thanks. He could not
+explain the true state of affairs without betraying one who
+certainly deserved little enough consideration at his hands. He
+took the more chivalrous view, however, and preserved her
+secret."
+
+"And that was why she shrieked and fainted when she saw the
+coronet," cried Mr. Holder. "Oh, my God! what a blind fool I have
+been! And his asking to be allowed to go out for five minutes!
+The dear fellow wanted to see if the missing piece were at the
+scene of the struggle. How cruelly I have misjudged him!"
+
+"When I arrived at the house," continued Holmes, "I at once went
+very carefully round it to observe if there were any traces in
+the snow which might help me. I knew that none had fallen since
+the evening before, and also that there had been a strong frost
+to preserve impressions. I passed along the tradesmen's path, but
+found it all trampled down and indistinguishable. Just beyond it,
+however, at the far side of the kitchen door, a woman had stood
+and talked with a man, whose round impressions on one side showed
+that he had a wooden leg. I could even tell that they had been
+disturbed, for the woman had run back swiftly to the door, as was
+shown by the deep toe and light heel marks, while Wooden-leg had
+waited a little, and then had gone away. I thought at the time
+that this might be the maid and her sweetheart, of whom you had
+already spoken to me, and inquiry showed it was so. I passed
+round the garden without seeing anything more than random tracks,
+which I took to be the police; but when I got into the stable
+lane a very long and complex story was written in the snow in
+front of me.
+
+"There was a double line of tracks of a booted man, and a second
+double line which I saw with delight belonged to a man with naked
+feet. I was at once convinced from what you had told me that the
+latter was your son. The first had walked both ways, but the
+other had run swiftly, and as his tread was marked in places over
+the depression of the boot, it was obvious that he had passed
+after the other. I followed them up and found they led to the
+hall window, where Boots had worn all the snow away while
+waiting. Then I walked to the other end, which was a hundred
+yards or more down the lane. I saw where Boots had faced round,
+where the snow was cut up as though there had been a struggle,
+and, finally, where a few drops of blood had fallen, to show me
+that I was not mistaken. Boots had then run down the lane, and
+another little smudge of blood showed that it was he who had been
+hurt. When he came to the highroad at the other end, I found that
+the pavement had been cleared, so there was an end to that clue.
+
+"On entering the house, however, I examined, as you remember, the
+sill and framework of the hall window with my lens, and I could
+at once see that someone had passed out. I could distinguish the
+outline of an instep where the wet foot had been placed in coming
+in. I was then beginning to be able to form an opinion as to what
+had occurred. A man had waited outside the window; someone had
+brought the gems; the deed had been overseen by your son; he had
+pursued the thief; had struggled with him; they had each tugged
+at the coronet, their united strength causing injuries which
+neither alone could have effected. He had returned with the
+prize, but had left a fragment in the grasp of his opponent. So
+far I was clear. The question now was, who was the man and who
+was it brought him the coronet?
+
+"It is an old maxim of mine that when you have excluded the
+impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the
+truth. Now, I knew that it was not you who had brought it down,
+so there only remained your niece and the maids. But if it were
+the maids, why should your son allow himself to be accused in
+their place? There could be no possible reason. As he loved his
+cousin, however, there was an excellent explanation why he should
+retain her secret--the more so as the secret was a disgraceful
+one. When I remembered that you had seen her at that window, and
+how she had fainted on seeing the coronet again, my conjecture
+became a certainty.
+
+"And who could it be who was her confederate? A lover evidently,
+for who else could outweigh the love and gratitude which she must
+feel to you? I knew that you went out little, and that your
+circle of friends was a very limited one. But among them was Sir
+George Burnwell. I had heard of him before as being a man of evil
+reputation among women. It must have been he who wore those boots
+and retained the missing gems. Even though he knew that Arthur
+had discovered him, he might still flatter himself that he was
+safe, for the lad could not say a word without compromising his
+own family.
+
+"Well, your own good sense will suggest what measures I took
+next. I went in the shape of a loafer to Sir George's house,
+managed to pick up an acquaintance with his valet, learned that
+his master had cut his head the night before, and, finally, at
+the expense of six shillings, made all sure by buying a pair of
+his cast-off shoes. With these I journeyed down to Streatham and
+saw that they exactly fitted the tracks."
+
+"I saw an ill-dressed vagabond in the lane yesterday evening,"
+said Mr. Holder.
+
+"Precisely. It was I. I found that I had my man, so I came home
+and changed my clothes. It was a delicate part which I had to
+play then, for I saw that a prosecution must be avoided to avert
+scandal, and I knew that so astute a villain would see that our
+hands were tied in the matter. I went and saw him. At first, of
+course, he denied everything. But when I gave him every
+particular that had occurred, he tried to bluster and took down a
+life-preserver from the wall. I knew my man, however, and I
+clapped a pistol to his head before he could strike. Then he
+became a little more reasonable. I told him that we would give
+him a price for the stones he held--1000 pounds apiece. That
+brought out the first signs of grief that he had shown. 'Why,
+dash it all!' said he, 'I've let them go at six hundred for the
+three!' I soon managed to get the address of the receiver who had
+them, on promising him that there would be no prosecution. Off I
+set to him, and after much chaffering I got our stones at 1000
+pounds apiece. Then I looked in upon your son, told him that all
+was right, and eventually got to my bed about two o'clock, after
+what I may call a really hard day's work."
+
+"A day which has saved England from a great public scandal," said
+the banker, rising. "Sir, I cannot find words to thank you, but
+you shall not find me ungrateful for what you have done. Your
+skill has indeed exceeded all that I have heard of it. And now I
+must fly to my dear boy to apologise to him for the wrong which I
+have done him. As to what you tell me of poor Mary, it goes to my
+very heart. Not even your skill can inform me where she is now."
+
+"I think that we may safely say," returned Holmes, "that she is
+wherever Sir George Burnwell is. It is equally certain, too, that
+whatever her sins are, they will soon receive a more than
+sufficient punishment."
+
+
+
+XII. THE ADVENTURE OF THE COPPER BEECHES
+
+"To the man who loves art for its own sake," remarked Sherlock
+Holmes, tossing aside the advertisement sheet of the Daily
+Telegraph, "it is frequently in its least important and lowliest
+manifestations that the keenest pleasure is to be derived. It is
+pleasant to me to observe, Watson, that you have so far grasped
+this truth that in these little records of our cases which you
+have been good enough to draw up, and, I am bound to say,
+occasionally to embellish, you have given prominence not so much
+to the many causes célèbres and sensational trials in which I
+have figured but rather to those incidents which may have been
+trivial in themselves, but which have given room for those
+faculties of deduction and of logical synthesis which I have made
+my special province."
+
+"And yet," said I, smiling, "I cannot quite hold myself absolved
+from the charge of sensationalism which has been urged against my
+records."
+
+"You have erred, perhaps," he observed, taking up a glowing
+cinder with the tongs and lighting with it the long cherry-wood
+pipe which was wont to replace his clay when he was in a
+disputatious rather than a meditative mood--"you have erred
+perhaps in attempting to put colour and life into each of your
+statements instead of confining yourself to the task of placing
+upon record that severe reasoning from cause to effect which is
+really the only notable feature about the thing."
+
+"It seems to me that I have done you full justice in the matter,"
+I remarked with some coldness, for I was repelled by the egotism
+which I had more than once observed to be a strong factor in my
+friend's singular character.
+
+"No, it is not selfishness or conceit," said he, answering, as
+was his wont, my thoughts rather than my words. "If I claim full
+justice for my art, it is because it is an impersonal thing--a
+thing beyond myself. Crime is common. Logic is rare. Therefore it
+is upon the logic rather than upon the crime that you should
+dwell. You have degraded what should have been a course of
+lectures into a series of tales."
+
+It was a cold morning of the early spring, and we sat after
+breakfast on either side of a cheery fire in the old room at
+Baker Street. A thick fog rolled down between the lines of
+dun-coloured houses, and the opposing windows loomed like dark,
+shapeless blurs through the heavy yellow wreaths. Our gas was lit
+and shone on the white cloth and glimmer of china and metal, for
+the table had not been cleared yet. Sherlock Holmes had been
+silent all the morning, dipping continuously into the
+advertisement columns of a succession of papers until at last,
+having apparently given up his search, he had emerged in no very
+sweet temper to lecture me upon my literary shortcomings.
+
+"At the same time," he remarked after a pause, during which he
+had sat puffing at his long pipe and gazing down into the fire,
+"you can hardly be open to a charge of sensationalism, for out of
+these cases which you have been so kind as to interest yourself
+in, a fair proportion do not treat of crime, in its legal sense,
+at all. The small matter in which I endeavoured to help the King
+of Bohemia, the singular experience of Miss Mary Sutherland, the
+problem connected with the man with the twisted lip, and the
+incident of the noble bachelor, were all matters which are
+outside the pale of the law. But in avoiding the sensational, I
+fear that you may have bordered on the trivial."
+
+"The end may have been so," I answered, "but the methods I hold
+to have been novel and of interest."
+
+"Pshaw, my dear fellow, what do the public, the great unobservant
+public, who could hardly tell a weaver by his tooth or a
+compositor by his left thumb, care about the finer shades of
+analysis and deduction! But, indeed, if you are trivial, I cannot
+blame you, for the days of the great cases are past. Man, or at
+least criminal man, has lost all enterprise and originality. As
+to my own little practice, it seems to be degenerating into an
+agency for recovering lost lead pencils and giving advice to
+young ladies from boarding-schools. I think that I have touched
+bottom at last, however. This note I had this morning marks my
+zero-point, I fancy. Read it!" He tossed a crumpled letter across
+to me.
+
+It was dated from Montague Place upon the preceding evening, and
+ran thus:
+
+"DEAR MR. HOLMES:--I am very anxious to consult you as to whether
+I should or should not accept a situation which has been offered
+to me as governess. I shall call at half-past ten to-morrow if I
+do not inconvenience you. Yours faithfully,
+                                               "VIOLET HUNTER."
+
+"Do you know the young lady?" I asked.
+
+"Not I."
+
+"It is half-past ten now."
+
+"Yes, and I have no doubt that is her ring."
+
+"It may turn out to be of more interest than you think. You
+remember that the affair of the blue carbuncle, which appeared to
+be a mere whim at first, developed into a serious investigation.
+It may be so in this case, also."
+
+"Well, let us hope so. But our doubts will very soon be solved,
+for here, unless I am much mistaken, is the person in question."
+
+As he spoke the door opened and a young lady entered the room.
+She was plainly but neatly dressed, with a bright, quick face,
+freckled like a plover's egg, and with the brisk manner of a
+woman who has had her own way to make in the world.
+
+"You will excuse my troubling you, I am sure," said she, as my
+companion rose to greet her, "but I have had a very strange
+experience, and as I have no parents or relations of any sort
+from whom I could ask advice, I thought that perhaps you would be
+kind enough to tell me what I should do."
+
+"Pray take a seat, Miss Hunter. I shall be happy to do anything
+that I can to serve you."
+
+I could see that Holmes was favourably impressed by the manner
+and speech of his new client. He looked her over in his searching
+fashion, and then composed himself, with his lids drooping and
+his finger-tips together, to listen to her story.
+
+"I have been a governess for five years," said she, "in the
+family of Colonel Spence Munro, but two months ago the colonel
+received an appointment at Halifax, in Nova Scotia, and took his
+children over to America with him, so that I found myself without
+a situation. I advertised, and I answered advertisements, but
+without success. At last the little money which I had saved began
+to run short, and I was at my wit's end as to what I should do.
+
+"There is a well-known agency for governesses in the West End
+called Westaway's, and there I used to call about once a week in
+order to see whether anything had turned up which might suit me.
+Westaway was the name of the founder of the business, but it is
+really managed by Miss Stoper. She sits in her own little office,
+and the ladies who are seeking employment wait in an anteroom,
+and are then shown in one by one, when she consults her ledgers
+and sees whether she has anything which would suit them.
+
+"Well, when I called last week I was shown into the little office
+as usual, but I found that Miss Stoper was not alone. A
+prodigiously stout man with a very smiling face and a great heavy
+chin which rolled down in fold upon fold over his throat sat at
+her elbow with a pair of glasses on his nose, looking very
+earnestly at the ladies who entered. As I came in he gave quite a
+jump in his chair and turned quickly to Miss Stoper.
+
+"'That will do,' said he; 'I could not ask for anything better.
+Capital! capital!' He seemed quite enthusiastic and rubbed his
+hands together in the most genial fashion. He was such a
+comfortable-looking man that it was quite a pleasure to look at
+him.
+
+"'You are looking for a situation, miss?' he asked.
+
+"'Yes, sir.'
+
+"'As governess?'
+
+"'Yes, sir.'
+
+"'And what salary do you ask?'
+
+"'I had 4 pounds a month in my last place with Colonel Spence
+Munro.'
+
+"'Oh, tut, tut! sweating--rank sweating!' he cried, throwing his
+fat hands out into the air like a man who is in a boiling
+passion. 'How could anyone offer so pitiful a sum to a lady with
+such attractions and accomplishments?'
+
+"'My accomplishments, sir, may be less than you imagine,' said I.
+'A little French, a little German, music, and drawing--'
+
+"'Tut, tut!' he cried. 'This is all quite beside the question.
+The point is, have you or have you not the bearing and deportment
+of a lady? There it is in a nutshell. If you have not, you are
+not fitted for the rearing of a child who may some day play a
+considerable part in the history of the country. But if you have
+why, then, how could any gentleman ask you to condescend to
+accept anything under the three figures? Your salary with me,
+madam, would commence at 100 pounds a year.'
+
+"You may imagine, Mr. Holmes, that to me, destitute as I was,
+such an offer seemed almost too good to be true. The gentleman,
+however, seeing perhaps the look of incredulity upon my face,
+opened a pocket-book and took out a note.
+
+"'It is also my custom,' said he, smiling in the most pleasant
+fashion until his eyes were just two little shining slits amid
+the white creases of his face, 'to advance to my young ladies
+half their salary beforehand, so that they may meet any little
+expenses of their journey and their wardrobe.'
+
+"It seemed to me that I had never met so fascinating and so
+thoughtful a man. As I was already in debt to my tradesmen, the
+advance was a great convenience, and yet there was something
+unnatural about the whole transaction which made me wish to know
+a little more before I quite committed myself.
+
+"'May I ask where you live, sir?' said I.
+
+"'Hampshire. Charming rural place. The Copper Beeches, five miles
+on the far side of Winchester. It is the most lovely country, my
+dear young lady, and the dearest old country-house.'
+
+"'And my duties, sir? I should be glad to know what they would
+be.'
+
+"'One child--one dear little romper just six years old. Oh, if
+you could see him killing cockroaches with a slipper! Smack!
+smack! smack! Three gone before you could wink!' He leaned back
+in his chair and laughed his eyes into his head again.
+
+"I was a little startled at the nature of the child's amusement,
+but the father's laughter made me think that perhaps he was
+joking.
+
+"'My sole duties, then,' I asked, 'are to take charge of a single
+child?'
+
+"'No, no, not the sole, not the sole, my dear young lady,' he
+cried. 'Your duty would be, as I am sure your good sense would
+suggest, to obey any little commands my wife might give, provided
+always that they were such commands as a lady might with
+propriety obey. You see no difficulty, heh?'
+
+"'I should be happy to make myself useful.'
+
+"'Quite so. In dress now, for example. We are faddy people, you
+know--faddy but kind-hearted. If you were asked to wear any dress
+which we might give you, you would not object to our little whim.
+Heh?'
+
+"'No,' said I, considerably astonished at his words.
+
+"'Or to sit here, or sit there, that would not be offensive to
+you?'
+
+"'Oh, no.'
+
+"'Or to cut your hair quite short before you come to us?'
+
+"I could hardly believe my ears. As you may observe, Mr. Holmes,
+my hair is somewhat luxuriant, and of a rather peculiar tint of
+chestnut. It has been considered artistic. I could not dream of
+sacrificing it in this offhand fashion.
+
+"'I am afraid that that is quite impossible,' said I. He had been
+watching me eagerly out of his small eyes, and I could see a
+shadow pass over his face as I spoke.
+
+"'I am afraid that it is quite essential,' said he. 'It is a
+little fancy of my wife's, and ladies' fancies, you know, madam,
+ladies' fancies must be consulted. And so you won't cut your
+hair?'
+
+"'No, sir, I really could not,' I answered firmly.
+
+"'Ah, very well; then that quite settles the matter. It is a
+pity, because in other respects you would really have done very
+nicely. In that case, Miss Stoper, I had best inspect a few more
+of your young ladies.'
+
+"The manageress had sat all this while busy with her papers
+without a word to either of us, but she glanced at me now with so
+much annoyance upon her face that I could not help suspecting
+that she had lost a handsome commission through my refusal.
+
+"'Do you desire your name to be kept upon the books?' she asked.
+
+"'If you please, Miss Stoper.'
+
+"'Well, really, it seems rather useless, since you refuse the
+most excellent offers in this fashion,' said she sharply. 'You
+can hardly expect us to exert ourselves to find another such
+opening for you. Good-day to you, Miss Hunter.' She struck a gong
+upon the table, and I was shown out by the page.
+
+"Well, Mr. Holmes, when I got back to my lodgings and found
+little enough in the cupboard, and two or three bills upon the
+table, I began to ask myself whether I had not done a very
+foolish thing. After all, if these people had strange fads and
+expected obedience on the most extraordinary matters, they were
+at least ready to pay for their eccentricity. Very few
+governesses in England are getting 100 pounds a year. Besides,
+what use was my hair to me? Many people are improved by wearing
+it short and perhaps I should be among the number. Next day I was
+inclined to think that I had made a mistake, and by the day after
+I was sure of it. I had almost overcome my pride so far as to go
+back to the agency and inquire whether the place was still open
+when I received this letter from the gentleman himself. I have it
+here and I will read it to you:
+
+                       "'The Copper Beeches, near Winchester.
+"'DEAR MISS HUNTER:--Miss Stoper has very kindly given me your
+address, and I write from here to ask you whether you have
+reconsidered your decision. My wife is very anxious that you
+should come, for she has been much attracted by my description of
+you. We are willing to give 30 pounds a quarter, or 120 pounds a
+year, so as to recompense you for any little inconvenience which
+our fads may cause you. They are not very exacting, after all. My
+wife is fond of a particular shade of electric blue and would
+like you to wear such a dress indoors in the morning. You need
+not, however, go to the expense of purchasing one, as we have one
+belonging to my dear daughter Alice (now in Philadelphia), which
+would, I should think, fit you very well. Then, as to sitting
+here or there, or amusing yourself in any manner indicated, that
+need cause you no inconvenience. As regards your hair, it is no
+doubt a pity, especially as I could not help remarking its beauty
+during our short interview, but I am afraid that I must remain
+firm upon this point, and I only hope that the increased salary
+may recompense you for the loss. Your duties, as far as the child
+is concerned, are very light. Now do try to come, and I shall
+meet you with the dog-cart at Winchester. Let me know your train.
+Yours faithfully, JEPHRO RUCASTLE.'
+
+"That is the letter which I have just received, Mr. Holmes, and
+my mind is made up that I will accept it. I thought, however,
+that before taking the final step I should like to submit the
+whole matter to your consideration."
+
+"Well, Miss Hunter, if your mind is made up, that settles the
+question," said Holmes, smiling.
+
+"But you would not advise me to refuse?"
+
+"I confess that it is not the situation which I should like to
+see a sister of mine apply for."
+
+"What is the meaning of it all, Mr. Holmes?"
+
+"Ah, I have no data. I cannot tell. Perhaps you have yourself
+formed some opinion?"
+
+"Well, there seems to me to be only one possible solution. Mr.
+Rucastle seemed to be a very kind, good-natured man. Is it not
+possible that his wife is a lunatic, that he desires to keep the
+matter quiet for fear she should be taken to an asylum, and that
+he humours her fancies in every way in order to prevent an
+outbreak?"
+
+"That is a possible solution--in fact, as matters stand, it is
+the most probable one. But in any case it does not seem to be a
+nice household for a young lady."
+
+"But the money, Mr. Holmes, the money!"
+
+"Well, yes, of course the pay is good--too good. That is what
+makes me uneasy. Why should they give you 120 pounds a year, when
+they could have their pick for 40 pounds? There must be some
+strong reason behind."
+
+"I thought that if I told you the circumstances you would
+understand afterwards if I wanted your help. I should feel so
+much stronger if I felt that you were at the back of me."
+
+"Oh, you may carry that feeling away with you. I assure you that
+your little problem promises to be the most interesting which has
+come my way for some months. There is something distinctly novel
+about some of the features. If you should find yourself in doubt
+or in danger--"
+
+"Danger! What danger do you foresee?"
+
+Holmes shook his head gravely. "It would cease to be a danger if
+we could define it," said he. "But at any time, day or night, a
+telegram would bring me down to your help."
+
+"That is enough." She rose briskly from her chair with the
+anxiety all swept from her face. "I shall go down to Hampshire
+quite easy in my mind now. I shall write to Mr. Rucastle at once,
+sacrifice my poor hair to-night, and start for Winchester
+to-morrow." With a few grateful words to Holmes she bade us both
+good-night and bustled off upon her way.
+
+"At least," said I as we heard her quick, firm steps descending
+the stairs, "she seems to be a young lady who is very well able
+to take care of herself."
+
+"And she would need to be," said Holmes gravely. "I am much
+mistaken if we do not hear from her before many days are past."
+
+It was not very long before my friend's prediction was fulfilled.
+A fortnight went by, during which I frequently found my thoughts
+turning in her direction and wondering what strange side-alley of
+human experience this lonely woman had strayed into. The unusual
+salary, the curious conditions, the light duties, all pointed to
+something abnormal, though whether a fad or a plot, or whether
+the man were a philanthropist or a villain, it was quite beyond
+my powers to determine. As to Holmes, I observed that he sat
+frequently for half an hour on end, with knitted brows and an
+abstracted air, but he swept the matter away with a wave of his
+hand when I mentioned it. "Data! data! data!" he cried
+impatiently. "I can't make bricks without clay." And yet he would
+always wind up by muttering that no sister of his should ever
+have accepted such a situation.
+
+The telegram which we eventually received came late one night
+just as I was thinking of turning in and Holmes was settling down
+to one of those all-night chemical researches which he frequently
+indulged in, when I would leave him stooping over a retort and a
+test-tube at night and find him in the same position when I came
+down to breakfast in the morning. He opened the yellow envelope,
+and then, glancing at the message, threw it across to me.
+
+"Just look up the trains in Bradshaw," said he, and turned back
+to his chemical studies.
+
+The summons was a brief and urgent one.
+
+"Please be at the Black Swan Hotel at Winchester at midday
+to-morrow," it said. "Do come! I am at my wit's end.  HUNTER."
+
+"Will you come with me?" asked Holmes, glancing up.
+
+"I should wish to."
+
+"Just look it up, then."
+
+"There is a train at half-past nine," said I, glancing over my
+Bradshaw. "It is due at Winchester at 11:30."
+
+"That will do very nicely. Then perhaps I had better postpone my
+analysis of the acetones, as we may need to be at our best in the
+morning."
+
+By eleven o'clock the next day we were well upon our way to the
+old English capital. Holmes had been buried in the morning papers
+all the way down, but after we had passed the Hampshire border he
+threw them down and began to admire the scenery. It was an ideal
+spring day, a light blue sky, flecked with little fleecy white
+clouds drifting across from west to east. The sun was shining
+very brightly, and yet there was an exhilarating nip in the air,
+which set an edge to a man's energy. All over the countryside,
+away to the rolling hills around Aldershot, the little red and
+grey roofs of the farm-steadings peeped out from amid the light
+green of the new foliage.
+
+"Are they not fresh and beautiful?" I cried with all the
+enthusiasm of a man fresh from the fogs of Baker Street.
+
+But Holmes shook his head gravely.
+
+"Do you know, Watson," said he, "that it is one of the curses of
+a mind with a turn like mine that I must look at everything with
+reference to my own special subject. You look at these scattered
+houses, and you are impressed by their beauty. I look at them,
+and the only thought which comes to me is a feeling of their
+isolation and of the impunity with which crime may be committed
+there."
+
+"Good heavens!" I cried. "Who would associate crime with these
+dear old homesteads?"
+
+"They always fill me with a certain horror. It is my belief,
+Watson, founded upon my experience, that the lowest and vilest
+alleys in London do not present a more dreadful record of sin
+than does the smiling and beautiful countryside."
+
+"You horrify me!"
+
+"But the reason is very obvious. The pressure of public opinion
+can do in the town what the law cannot accomplish. There is no
+lane so vile that the scream of a tortured child, or the thud of
+a drunkard's blow, does not beget sympathy and indignation among
+the neighbours, and then the whole machinery of justice is ever
+so close that a word of complaint can set it going, and there is
+but a step between the crime and the dock. But look at these
+lonely houses, each in its own fields, filled for the most part
+with poor ignorant folk who know little of the law. Think of the
+deeds of hellish cruelty, the hidden wickedness which may go on,
+year in, year out, in such places, and none the wiser. Had this
+lady who appeals to us for help gone to live in Winchester, I
+should never have had a fear for her. It is the five miles of
+country which makes the danger. Still, it is clear that she is
+not personally threatened."
+
+"No. If she can come to Winchester to meet us she can get away."
+
+"Quite so. She has her freedom."
+
+"What CAN be the matter, then? Can you suggest no explanation?"
+
+"I have devised seven separate explanations, each of which would
+cover the facts as far as we know them. But which of these is
+correct can only be determined by the fresh information which we
+shall no doubt find waiting for us. Well, there is the tower of
+the cathedral, and we shall soon learn all that Miss Hunter has
+to tell."
+
+The Black Swan is an inn of repute in the High Street, at no
+distance from the station, and there we found the young lady
+waiting for us. She had engaged a sitting-room, and our lunch
+awaited us upon the table.
+
+"I am so delighted that you have come," she said earnestly. "It
+is so very kind of you both; but indeed I do not know what I
+should do. Your advice will be altogether invaluable to me."
+
+"Pray tell us what has happened to you."
+
+"I will do so, and I must be quick, for I have promised Mr.
+Rucastle to be back before three. I got his leave to come into
+town this morning, though he little knew for what purpose."
+
+"Let us have everything in its due order." Holmes thrust his long
+thin legs out towards the fire and composed himself to listen.
+
+"In the first place, I may say that I have met, on the whole,
+with no actual ill-treatment from Mr. and Mrs. Rucastle. It is
+only fair to them to say that. But I cannot understand them, and
+I am not easy in my mind about them."
+
+"What can you not understand?"
+
+"Their reasons for their conduct. But you shall have it all just
+as it occurred. When I came down, Mr. Rucastle met me here and
+drove me in his dog-cart to the Copper Beeches. It is, as he
+said, beautifully situated, but it is not beautiful in itself,
+for it is a large square block of a house, whitewashed, but all
+stained and streaked with damp and bad weather. There are grounds
+round it, woods on three sides, and on the fourth a field which
+slopes down to the Southampton highroad, which curves past about
+a hundred yards from the front door. This ground in front belongs
+to the house, but the woods all round are part of Lord
+Southerton's preserves. A clump of copper beeches immediately in
+front of the hall door has given its name to the place.
+
+"I was driven over by my employer, who was as amiable as ever,
+and was introduced by him that evening to his wife and the child.
+There was no truth, Mr. Holmes, in the conjecture which seemed to
+us to be probable in your rooms at Baker Street. Mrs. Rucastle is
+not mad. I found her to be a silent, pale-faced woman, much
+younger than her husband, not more than thirty, I should think,
+while he can hardly be less than forty-five. From their
+conversation I have gathered that they have been married about
+seven years, that he was a widower, and that his only child by
+the first wife was the daughter who has gone to Philadelphia. Mr.
+Rucastle told me in private that the reason why she had left them
+was that she had an unreasoning aversion to her stepmother. As
+the daughter could not have been less than twenty, I can quite
+imagine that her position must have been uncomfortable with her
+father's young wife.
+
+"Mrs. Rucastle seemed to me to be colourless in mind as well as
+in feature. She impressed me neither favourably nor the reverse.
+She was a nonentity. It was easy to see that she was passionately
+devoted both to her husband and to her little son. Her light grey
+eyes wandered continually from one to the other, noting every
+little want and forestalling it if possible. He was kind to her
+also in his bluff, boisterous fashion, and on the whole they
+seemed to be a happy couple. And yet she had some secret sorrow,
+this woman. She would often be lost in deep thought, with the
+saddest look upon her face. More than once I have surprised her
+in tears. I have thought sometimes that it was the disposition of
+her child which weighed upon her mind, for I have never met so
+utterly spoiled and so ill-natured a little creature. He is small
+for his age, with a head which is quite disproportionately large.
+His whole life appears to be spent in an alternation between
+savage fits of passion and gloomy intervals of sulking. Giving
+pain to any creature weaker than himself seems to be his one idea
+of amusement, and he shows quite remarkable talent in planning
+the capture of mice, little birds, and insects. But I would
+rather not talk about the creature, Mr. Holmes, and, indeed, he
+has little to do with my story."
+
+"I am glad of all details," remarked my friend, "whether they
+seem to you to be relevant or not."
+
+"I shall try not to miss anything of importance. The one
+unpleasant thing about the house, which struck me at once, was
+the appearance and conduct of the servants. There are only two, a
+man and his wife. Toller, for that is his name, is a rough,
+uncouth man, with grizzled hair and whiskers, and a perpetual
+smell of drink. Twice since I have been with them he has been
+quite drunk, and yet Mr. Rucastle seemed to take no notice of it.
+His wife is a very tall and strong woman with a sour face, as
+silent as Mrs. Rucastle and much less amiable. They are a most
+unpleasant couple, but fortunately I spend most of my time in the
+nursery and my own room, which are next to each other in one
+corner of the building.
+
+"For two days after my arrival at the Copper Beeches my life was
+very quiet; on the third, Mrs. Rucastle came down just after
+breakfast and whispered something to her husband.
+
+"'Oh, yes,' said he, turning to me, 'we are very much obliged to
+you, Miss Hunter, for falling in with our whims so far as to cut
+your hair. I assure you that it has not detracted in the tiniest
+iota from your appearance. We shall now see how the electric-blue
+dress will become you. You will find it laid out upon the bed in
+your room, and if you would be so good as to put it on we should
+both be extremely obliged.'
+
+"The dress which I found waiting for me was of a peculiar shade
+of blue. It was of excellent material, a sort of beige, but it
+bore unmistakable signs of having been worn before. It could not
+have been a better fit if I had been measured for it. Both Mr.
+and Mrs. Rucastle expressed a delight at the look of it, which
+seemed quite exaggerated in its vehemence. They were waiting for
+me in the drawing-room, which is a very large room, stretching
+along the entire front of the house, with three long windows
+reaching down to the floor. A chair had been placed close to the
+central window, with its back turned towards it. In this I was
+asked to sit, and then Mr. Rucastle, walking up and down on the
+other side of the room, began to tell me a series of the funniest
+stories that I have ever listened to. You cannot imagine how
+comical he was, and I laughed until I was quite weary. Mrs.
+Rucastle, however, who has evidently no sense of humour, never so
+much as smiled, but sat with her hands in her lap, and a sad,
+anxious look upon her face. After an hour or so, Mr. Rucastle
+suddenly remarked that it was time to commence the duties of the
+day, and that I might change my dress and go to little Edward in
+the nursery.
+
+"Two days later this same performance was gone through under
+exactly similar circumstances. Again I changed my dress, again I
+sat in the window, and again I laughed very heartily at the funny
+stories of which my employer had an immense répertoire, and which
+he told inimitably. Then he handed me a yellow-backed novel, and
+moving my chair a little sideways, that my own shadow might not
+fall upon the page, he begged me to read aloud to him. I read for
+about ten minutes, beginning in the heart of a chapter, and then
+suddenly, in the middle of a sentence, he ordered me to cease and
+to change my dress.
+
+"You can easily imagine, Mr. Holmes, how curious I became as to
+what the meaning of this extraordinary performance could possibly
+be. They were always very careful, I observed, to turn my face
+away from the window, so that I became consumed with the desire
+to see what was going on behind my back. At first it seemed to be
+impossible, but I soon devised a means. My hand-mirror had been
+broken, so a happy thought seized me, and I concealed a piece of
+the glass in my handkerchief. On the next occasion, in the midst
+of my laughter, I put my handkerchief up to my eyes, and was able
+with a little management to see all that there was behind me. I
+confess that I was disappointed. There was nothing. At least that
+was my first impression. At the second glance, however, I
+perceived that there was a man standing in the Southampton Road,
+a small bearded man in a grey suit, who seemed to be looking in
+my direction. The road is an important highway, and there are
+usually people there. This man, however, was leaning against the
+railings which bordered our field and was looking earnestly up. I
+lowered my handkerchief and glanced at Mrs. Rucastle to find her
+eyes fixed upon me with a most searching gaze. She said nothing,
+but I am convinced that she had divined that I had a mirror in my
+hand and had seen what was behind me. She rose at once.
+
+"'Jephro,' said she, 'there is an impertinent fellow upon the
+road there who stares up at Miss Hunter.'
+
+"'No friend of yours, Miss Hunter?' he asked.
+
+"'No, I know no one in these parts.'
+
+"'Dear me! How very impertinent! Kindly turn round and motion to
+him to go away.'
+
+"'Surely it would be better to take no notice.'
+
+"'No, no, we should have him loitering here always. Kindly turn
+round and wave him away like that.'
+
+"I did as I was told, and at the same instant Mrs. Rucastle drew
+down the blind. That was a week ago, and from that time I have
+not sat again in the window, nor have I worn the blue dress, nor
+seen the man in the road."
+
+"Pray continue," said Holmes. "Your narrative promises to be a
+most interesting one."
+
+"You will find it rather disconnected, I fear, and there may
+prove to be little relation between the different incidents of
+which I speak. On the very first day that I was at the Copper
+Beeches, Mr. Rucastle took me to a small outhouse which stands
+near the kitchen door. As we approached it I heard the sharp
+rattling of a chain, and the sound as of a large animal moving
+about.
+
+"'Look in here!' said Mr. Rucastle, showing me a slit between two
+planks. 'Is he not a beauty?'
+
+"I looked through and was conscious of two glowing eyes, and of a
+vague figure huddled up in the darkness.
+
+"'Don't be frightened,' said my employer, laughing at the start
+which I had given. 'It's only Carlo, my mastiff. I call him mine,
+but really old Toller, my groom, is the only man who can do
+anything with him. We feed him once a day, and not too much then,
+so that he is always as keen as mustard. Toller lets him loose
+every night, and God help the trespasser whom he lays his fangs
+upon. For goodness' sake don't you ever on any pretext set your
+foot over the threshold at night, for it's as much as your life
+is worth.'
+
+"The warning was no idle one, for two nights later I happened to
+look out of my bedroom window about two o'clock in the morning.
+It was a beautiful moonlight night, and the lawn in front of the
+house was silvered over and almost as bright as day. I was
+standing, rapt in the peaceful beauty of the scene, when I was
+aware that something was moving under the shadow of the copper
+beeches. As it emerged into the moonshine I saw what it was. It
+was a giant dog, as large as a calf, tawny tinted, with hanging
+jowl, black muzzle, and huge projecting bones. It walked slowly
+across the lawn and vanished into the shadow upon the other side.
+That dreadful sentinel sent a chill to my heart which I do not
+think that any burglar could have done.
+
+"And now I have a very strange experience to tell you. I had, as
+you know, cut off my hair in London, and I had placed it in a
+great coil at the bottom of my trunk. One evening, after the
+child was in bed, I began to amuse myself by examining the
+furniture of my room and by rearranging my own little things.
+There was an old chest of drawers in the room, the two upper ones
+empty and open, the lower one locked. I had filled the first two
+with my linen, and as I had still much to pack away I was
+naturally annoyed at not having the use of the third drawer. It
+struck me that it might have been fastened by a mere oversight,
+so I took out my bunch of keys and tried to open it. The very
+first key fitted to perfection, and I drew the drawer open. There
+was only one thing in it, but I am sure that you would never
+guess what it was. It was my coil of hair.
+
+"I took it up and examined it. It was of the same peculiar tint,
+and the same thickness. But then the impossibility of the thing
+obtruded itself upon me. How could my hair have been locked in
+the drawer? With trembling hands I undid my trunk, turned out the
+contents, and drew from the bottom my own hair. I laid the two
+tresses together, and I assure you that they were identical. Was
+it not extraordinary? Puzzle as I would, I could make nothing at
+all of what it meant. I returned the strange hair to the drawer,
+and I said nothing of the matter to the Rucastles as I felt that
+I had put myself in the wrong by opening a drawer which they had
+locked.
+
+"I am naturally observant, as you may have remarked, Mr. Holmes,
+and I soon had a pretty good plan of the whole house in my head.
+There was one wing, however, which appeared not to be inhabited
+at all. A door which faced that which led into the quarters of
+the Tollers opened into this suite, but it was invariably locked.
+One day, however, as I ascended the stair, I met Mr. Rucastle
+coming out through this door, his keys in his hand, and a look on
+his face which made him a very different person to the round,
+jovial man to whom I was accustomed. His cheeks were red, his
+brow was all crinkled with anger, and the veins stood out at his
+temples with passion. He locked the door and hurried past me
+without a word or a look.
+
+"This aroused my curiosity, so when I went out for a walk in the
+grounds with my charge, I strolled round to the side from which I
+could see the windows of this part of the house. There were four
+of them in a row, three of which were simply dirty, while the
+fourth was shuttered up. They were evidently all deserted. As I
+strolled up and down, glancing at them occasionally, Mr. Rucastle
+came out to me, looking as merry and jovial as ever.
+
+"'Ah!' said he, 'you must not think me rude if I passed you
+without a word, my dear young lady. I was preoccupied with
+business matters.'
+
+"I assured him that I was not offended. 'By the way,' said I,
+'you seem to have quite a suite of spare rooms up there, and one
+of them has the shutters up.'
+
+"He looked surprised and, as it seemed to me, a little startled
+at my remark.
+
+"'Photography is one of my hobbies,' said he. 'I have made my
+dark room up there. But, dear me! what an observant young lady we
+have come upon. Who would have believed it? Who would have ever
+believed it?' He spoke in a jesting tone, but there was no jest
+in his eyes as he looked at me. I read suspicion there and
+annoyance, but no jest.
+
+"Well, Mr. Holmes, from the moment that I understood that there
+was something about that suite of rooms which I was not to know,
+I was all on fire to go over them. It was not mere curiosity,
+though I have my share of that. It was more a feeling of duty--a
+feeling that some good might come from my penetrating to this
+place. They talk of woman's instinct; perhaps it was woman's
+instinct which gave me that feeling. At any rate, it was there,
+and I was keenly on the lookout for any chance to pass the
+forbidden door.
+
+"It was only yesterday that the chance came. I may tell you that,
+besides Mr. Rucastle, both Toller and his wife find something to
+do in these deserted rooms, and I once saw him carrying a large
+black linen bag with him through the door. Recently he has been
+drinking hard, and yesterday evening he was very drunk; and when
+I came upstairs there was the key in the door. I have no doubt at
+all that he had left it there. Mr. and Mrs. Rucastle were both
+downstairs, and the child was with them, so that I had an
+admirable opportunity. I turned the key gently in the lock,
+opened the door, and slipped through.
+
+"There was a little passage in front of me, unpapered and
+uncarpeted, which turned at a right angle at the farther end.
+Round this corner were three doors in a line, the first and third
+of which were open. They each led into an empty room, dusty and
+cheerless, with two windows in the one and one in the other, so
+thick with dirt that the evening light glimmered dimly through
+them. The centre door was closed, and across the outside of it
+had been fastened one of the broad bars of an iron bed, padlocked
+at one end to a ring in the wall, and fastened at the other with
+stout cord. The door itself was locked as well, and the key was
+not there. This barricaded door corresponded clearly with the
+shuttered window outside, and yet I could see by the glimmer from
+beneath it that the room was not in darkness. Evidently there was
+a skylight which let in light from above. As I stood in the
+passage gazing at the sinister door and wondering what secret it
+might veil, I suddenly heard the sound of steps within the room
+and saw a shadow pass backward and forward against the little
+slit of dim light which shone out from under the door. A mad,
+unreasoning terror rose up in me at the sight, Mr. Holmes. My
+overstrung nerves failed me suddenly, and I turned and ran--ran
+as though some dreadful hand were behind me clutching at the
+skirt of my dress. I rushed down the passage, through the door,
+and straight into the arms of Mr. Rucastle, who was waiting
+outside.
+
+"'So,' said he, smiling, 'it was you, then. I thought that it
+must be when I saw the door open.'
+
+"'Oh, I am so frightened!' I panted.
+
+"'My dear young lady! my dear young lady!'--you cannot think how
+caressing and soothing his manner was--'and what has frightened
+you, my dear young lady?'
+
+"But his voice was just a little too coaxing. He overdid it. I
+was keenly on my guard against him.
+
+"'I was foolish enough to go into the empty wing,' I answered.
+'But it is so lonely and eerie in this dim light that I was
+frightened and ran out again. Oh, it is so dreadfully still in
+there!'
+
+"'Only that?' said he, looking at me keenly.
+
+"'Why, what did you think?' I asked.
+
+"'Why do you think that I lock this door?'
+
+"'I am sure that I do not know.'
+
+"'It is to keep people out who have no business there. Do you
+see?' He was still smiling in the most amiable manner.
+
+"'I am sure if I had known--'
+
+"'Well, then, you know now. And if you ever put your foot over
+that threshold again'--here in an instant the smile hardened into
+a grin of rage, and he glared down at me with the face of a
+demon--'I'll throw you to the mastiff.'
+
+"I was so terrified that I do not know what I did. I suppose that
+I must have rushed past him into my room. I remember nothing
+until I found myself lying on my bed trembling all over. Then I
+thought of you, Mr. Holmes. I could not live there longer without
+some advice. I was frightened of the house, of the man, of the
+woman, of the servants, even of the child. They were all horrible
+to me. If I could only bring you down all would be well. Of
+course I might have fled from the house, but my curiosity was
+almost as strong as my fears. My mind was soon made up. I would
+send you a wire. I put on my hat and cloak, went down to the
+office, which is about half a mile from the house, and then
+returned, feeling very much easier. A horrible doubt came into my
+mind as I approached the door lest the dog might be loose, but I
+remembered that Toller had drunk himself into a state of
+insensibility that evening, and I knew that he was the only one
+in the household who had any influence with the savage creature,
+or who would venture to set him free. I slipped in in safety and
+lay awake half the night in my joy at the thought of seeing you.
+I had no difficulty in getting leave to come into Winchester this
+morning, but I must be back before three o'clock, for Mr. and
+Mrs. Rucastle are going on a visit, and will be away all the
+evening, so that I must look after the child. Now I have told you
+all my adventures, Mr. Holmes, and I should be very glad if you
+could tell me what it all means, and, above all, what I should
+do."
+
+Holmes and I had listened spellbound to this extraordinary story.
+My friend rose now and paced up and down the room, his hands in
+his pockets, and an expression of the most profound gravity upon
+his face.
+
+"Is Toller still drunk?" he asked.
+
+"Yes. I heard his wife tell Mrs. Rucastle that she could do
+nothing with him."
+
+"That is well. And the Rucastles go out to-night?"
+
+"Yes."
+
+"Is there a cellar with a good strong lock?"
+
+"Yes, the wine-cellar."
+
+"You seem to me to have acted all through this matter like a very
+brave and sensible girl, Miss Hunter. Do you think that you could
+perform one more feat? I should not ask it of you if I did not
+think you a quite exceptional woman."
+
+"I will try. What is it?"
+
+"We shall be at the Copper Beeches by seven o'clock, my friend
+and I. The Rucastles will be gone by that time, and Toller will,
+we hope, be incapable. There only remains Mrs. Toller, who might
+give the alarm. If you could send her into the cellar on some
+errand, and then turn the key upon her, you would facilitate
+matters immensely."
+
+"I will do it."
+
+"Excellent! We shall then look thoroughly into the affair. Of
+course there is only one feasible explanation. You have been
+brought there to personate someone, and the real person is
+imprisoned in this chamber. That is obvious. As to who this
+prisoner is, I have no doubt that it is the daughter, Miss Alice
+Rucastle, if I remember right, who was said to have gone to
+America. You were chosen, doubtless, as resembling her in height,
+figure, and the colour of your hair. Hers had been cut off, very
+possibly in some illness through which she has passed, and so, of
+course, yours had to be sacrificed also. By a curious chance you
+came upon her tresses. The man in the road was undoubtedly some
+friend of hers--possibly her fiancé--and no doubt, as you wore
+the girl's dress and were so like her, he was convinced from your
+laughter, whenever he saw you, and afterwards from your gesture,
+that Miss Rucastle was perfectly happy, and that she no longer
+desired his attentions. The dog is let loose at night to prevent
+him from endeavouring to communicate with her. So much is fairly
+clear. The most serious point in the case is the disposition of
+the child."
+
+"What on earth has that to do with it?" I ejaculated.
+
+"My dear Watson, you as a medical man are continually gaining
+light as to the tendencies of a child by the study of the
+parents. Don't you see that the converse is equally valid. I have
+frequently gained my first real insight into the character of
+parents by studying their children. This child's disposition is
+abnormally cruel, merely for cruelty's sake, and whether he
+derives this from his smiling father, as I should suspect, or
+from his mother, it bodes evil for the poor girl who is in their
+power."
+
+"I am sure that you are right, Mr. Holmes," cried our client. "A
+thousand things come back to me which make me certain that you
+have hit it. Oh, let us lose not an instant in bringing help to
+this poor creature."
+
+"We must be circumspect, for we are dealing with a very cunning
+man. We can do nothing until seven o'clock. At that hour we shall
+be with you, and it will not be long before we solve the
+mystery."
+
+We were as good as our word, for it was just seven when we
+reached the Copper Beeches, having put up our trap at a wayside
+public-house. The group of trees, with their dark leaves shining
+like burnished metal in the light of the setting sun, were
+sufficient to mark the house even had Miss Hunter not been
+standing smiling on the door-step.
+
+"Have you managed it?" asked Holmes.
+
+A loud thudding noise came from somewhere downstairs. "That is
+Mrs. Toller in the cellar," said she. "Her husband lies snoring
+on the kitchen rug. Here are his keys, which are the duplicates
+of Mr. Rucastle's."
+
+"You have done well indeed!" cried Holmes with enthusiasm. "Now
+lead the way, and we shall soon see the end of this black
+business."
+
+We passed up the stair, unlocked the door, followed on down a
+passage, and found ourselves in front of the barricade which Miss
+Hunter had described. Holmes cut the cord and removed the
+transverse bar. Then he tried the various keys in the lock, but
+without success. No sound came from within, and at the silence
+Holmes' face clouded over.
+
+"I trust that we are not too late," said he. "I think, Miss
+Hunter, that we had better go in without you. Now, Watson, put
+your shoulder to it, and we shall see whether we cannot make our
+way in."
+
+It was an old rickety door and gave at once before our united
+strength. Together we rushed into the room. It was empty. There
+was no furniture save a little pallet bed, a small table, and a
+basketful of linen. The skylight above was open, and the prisoner
+gone.
+
+"There has been some villainy here," said Holmes; "this beauty
+has guessed Miss Hunter's intentions and has carried his victim
+off."
+
+"But how?"
+
+"Through the skylight. We shall soon see how he managed it." He
+swung himself up onto the roof. "Ah, yes," he cried, "here's the
+end of a long light ladder against the eaves. That is how he did
+it."
+
+"But it is impossible," said Miss Hunter; "the ladder was not
+there when the Rucastles went away."
+
+"He has come back and done it. I tell you that he is a clever and
+dangerous man. I should not be very much surprised if this were
+he whose step I hear now upon the stair. I think, Watson, that it
+would be as well for you to have your pistol ready."
+
+The words were hardly out of his mouth before a man appeared at
+the door of the room, a very fat and burly man, with a heavy
+stick in his hand. Miss Hunter screamed and shrunk against the
+wall at the sight of him, but Sherlock Holmes sprang forward and
+confronted him.
+
+"You villain!" said he, "where's your daughter?"
+
+The fat man cast his eyes round, and then up at the open
+skylight.
+
+"It is for me to ask you that," he shrieked, "you thieves! Spies
+and thieves! I have caught you, have I? You are in my power. I'll
+serve you!" He turned and clattered down the stairs as hard as he
+could go.
+
+"He's gone for the dog!" cried Miss Hunter.
+
+"I have my revolver," said I.
+
+"Better close the front door," cried Holmes, and we all rushed
+down the stairs together. We had hardly reached the hall when we
+heard the baying of a hound, and then a scream of agony, with a
+horrible worrying sound which it was dreadful to listen to. An
+elderly man with a red face and shaking limbs came staggering out
+at a side door.
+
+"My God!" he cried. "Someone has loosed the dog. It's not been
+fed for two days. Quick, quick, or it'll be too late!"
+
+Holmes and I rushed out and round the angle of the house, with
+Toller hurrying behind us. There was the huge famished brute, its
+black muzzle buried in Rucastle's throat, while he writhed and
+screamed upon the ground. Running up, I blew its brains out, and
+it fell over with its keen white teeth still meeting in the great
+creases of his neck. With much labour we separated them and
+carried him, living but horribly mangled, into the house. We laid
+him upon the drawing-room sofa, and having dispatched the sobered
+Toller to bear the news to his wife, I did what I could to
+relieve his pain. We were all assembled round him when the door
+opened, and a tall, gaunt woman entered the room.
+
+"Mrs. Toller!" cried Miss Hunter.
+
+"Yes, miss. Mr. Rucastle let me out when he came back before he
+went up to you. Ah, miss, it is a pity you didn't let me know
+what you were planning, for I would have told you that your pains
+were wasted."
+
+"Ha!" said Holmes, looking keenly at her. "It is clear that Mrs.
+Toller knows more about this matter than anyone else."
+
+"Yes, sir, I do, and I am ready enough to tell what I know."
+
+"Then, pray, sit down, and let us hear it for there are several
+points on which I must confess that I am still in the dark."
+
+"I will soon make it clear to you," said she; "and I'd have done
+so before now if I could ha' got out from the cellar. If there's
+police-court business over this, you'll remember that I was the
+one that stood your friend, and that I was Miss Alice's friend
+too.
+
+"She was never happy at home, Miss Alice wasn't, from the time
+that her father married again. She was slighted like and had no
+say in anything, but it never really became bad for her until
+after she met Mr. Fowler at a friend's house. As well as I could
+learn, Miss Alice had rights of her own by will, but she was so
+quiet and patient, she was, that she never said a word about them
+but just left everything in Mr. Rucastle's hands. He knew he was
+safe with her; but when there was a chance of a husband coming
+forward, who would ask for all that the law would give him, then
+her father thought it time to put a stop on it. He wanted her to
+sign a paper, so that whether she married or not, he could use
+her money. When she wouldn't do it, he kept on worrying her until
+she got brain-fever, and for six weeks was at death's door. Then
+she got better at last, all worn to a shadow, and with her
+beautiful hair cut off; but that didn't make no change in her
+young man, and he stuck to her as true as man could be."
+
+"Ah," said Holmes, "I think that what you have been good enough
+to tell us makes the matter fairly clear, and that I can deduce
+all that remains. Mr. Rucastle then, I presume, took to this
+system of imprisonment?"
+
+"Yes, sir."
+
+"And brought Miss Hunter down from London in order to get rid of
+the disagreeable persistence of Mr. Fowler."
+
+"That was it, sir."
+
+"But Mr. Fowler being a persevering man, as a good seaman should
+be, blockaded the house, and having met you succeeded by certain
+arguments, metallic or otherwise, in convincing you that your
+interests were the same as his."
+
+"Mr. Fowler was a very kind-spoken, free-handed gentleman," said
+Mrs. Toller serenely.
+
+"And in this way he managed that your good man should have no
+want of drink, and that a ladder should be ready at the moment
+when your master had gone out."
+
+"You have it, sir, just as it happened."
+
+"I am sure we owe you an apology, Mrs. Toller," said Holmes, "for
+you have certainly cleared up everything which puzzled us. And
+here comes the country surgeon and Mrs. Rucastle, so I think,
+Watson, that we had best escort Miss Hunter back to Winchester,
+as it seems to me that our locus standi now is rather a
+questionable one."
+
+And thus was solved the mystery of the sinister house with the
+copper beeches in front of the door. Mr. Rucastle survived, but
+was always a broken man, kept alive solely through the care of
+his devoted wife. They still live with their old servants, who
+probably know so much of Rucastle's past life that he finds it
+difficult to part from them. Mr. Fowler and Miss Rucastle were
+married, by special license, in Southampton the day after their
+flight, and he is now the holder of a government appointment in
+the island of Mauritius. As to Miss Violet Hunter, my friend
+Holmes, rather to my disappointment, manifested no further
+interest in her when once she had ceased to be the centre of one
+of his problems, and she is now the head of a private school at
+Walsall, where I believe that she has met with considerable success.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, by 
+Arthur Conan Doyle
+
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diff --git a/pg32325.txt b/pg32325.txt
deleted file mode 100644
index 054d3a7..0000000
--- a/pg32325.txt
+++ /dev/null
@@ -1,12290 +0,0 @@
-Project Gutenberg's The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, by Mark Twain
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
-almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
-re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
-with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
-
-
-Title: The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
-       Tom Sawyer's Comrade
-
-Author: Mark Twain
-
-Release Date: May 10, 2010 [EBook #32325]
-
-Language: English
-
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by James Adcock. Special thanks to The Internet
-Archive: American Libraries.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-[Illustration: Photo of the Author with Signature "S. L. Clemens"]
-
-THE ADVENTURES
-
-OF
-
-HUCKLEBERRY FINN
-
-(TOM SAWYER'S COMRADE)
-
-
-
-   SCENE: The Mississippi Valley
-   TIME: Forty to Fifty Years Ago
-
-
-
-   By Mark Twain
-
-
-
-   ILLUSTRATED
-
-
-
-   _NEW EDITION FROM NEW PLATES_
-
-
-
-
-   HARPER & BROTHERS PUBLISHERS
-
-   NEW YORK AND LONDON
-
-   ======
-
-
-Books by MARK TWAIN
-
-   ST. JOAN OF ARC
-   THE INNOCENTS ABROAD
-   ROUGHING IT
-   THE GILDED AGE
-   A TRAMP ABROAD
-   FOLLOWING THE EQUATOR
-   PUDD'NHEAD WILSON
-   SKETCHES NEW AND OLD
-   THE AMERICAN CLAIMANT
-   CHRISTIAN SCIENCE
-   A CONNECTICUT YANKEE AT THE COURT OF
-      KING ARTHUR
-   THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN
-   PERSONAL RECOLLECTIONS OF JOAN OF ARC
-   LIFE ON THE MISSISSIPPI
-   THE MAN THAT CORRUPTED HADLEYBURG
-   THE PRINCE AND THE PAUPER
-   THE $30,000 BEQUEST
-   THE ADVENTURES OF TOM SAWYER
-   TOM SAWYER ABROAD
-   WHAT IS MAN?
-   THE MYSTERIOUS STRANGER
-   ADAM'S DIARY
-   A DOG'S TALE
-   A DOUBLE-BARRELED DETECTIVE STORY
-   EDITORIAL WILD OATS
-   EVE'S DIARY
-   IN DEFENSE OF HARRIET SHELLY AND
-      OTHER ESSAYS
-   IS SHAKESPEARE DEAD?
-   CAPT. STORMFIELD'S VISIT TO HEAVEN
-   A HORSE'S TALE
-   THE JUMPING FROG
-   THE 1,000,000 POUND BANK-NOTE
-   TRAVELS AT HOME
-   TRAVELS IN HISTORY
-   MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS
-   MARK TWAIN'S SPEECHES
-
-   ======
-
-   HARPER & BROTHERS, NEW YORK
-   [Established 1817]
-
-   The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
-      -----
-   Copyright, 1884. by Samuel L. Clemens
-      -----
-   Copyright. 1896 and 1899. by Harper & Brothers
-      -----
-   Copyright. 1912, by Clara Gabrilowitsch
-      -----
-   Printed in the United States of America
-
-
-
-
-CONTENTS
-
-
-   Chap.
-   Notice
-   Explanatory
-   I. I Discover Moses and the Bulrushers.
-   II. Our Gang's Dark Oath
-   III. We Ambuscade the A-rabs
-   IV. The Hair-ball Oracle
-   V. Pap Starts in on a New Life
-   VI. Pap Struggles with the Death Angel
-   VII. I Fool Pap and Get Away
-   VIII. I Spare Miss Watson's Jim
-   IX. The House of Death Floats By
-   X. What Comes of Handlin' Snake-skin
-   XI. They're After Us!
-   XII. "Better Let Blame Well Alone"
-   XIII. Honest Loot from the "Walter Scott"
-   XIV. Was Solomon Wise?
-   XV. Fooling Poor Old Jim
-   XVI. The Rattlesnake-skin Does Its Work
-   XVII. The Grangerfords Take Me In
-   XVIII. Why Harney Rode Away for His Hat
-   XIX. The Duke and the Dauphin Come Aboard
-   XX. What Royalty Did to Parkville
-   XXI. An Arkansaw Difficulty
-   XXII. Why the Lynching Bee Failed
-   XXIII. The Orneriness of Kings
-   XXIV. The King Turns Parson
-   XXV. All Full of Tears and Flapdoodle
-   XXVI. I Steal the King's Plunder
-   XXVII. Dead Peter has His Gold
-   XXVIII. Overreaching Don't Pay
-   XXIX. I Light Out in the Storm
-   XXX. The Gold Saves the Thieves
-   XXXI. You Can't Pray a Lie
-   XXXII. I Have a New Name
-   XXXIII. The Pitiful Ending of Royalty
-   XXXIV. We Cheer Up Jim
-   XXXV. Dark, Deep-laid Plans
-   XXXVI. Trying to Help Jim
-   XXXVII. Jim Gets His Witch-pie
-   XXXVIII. "Here a Captive Heart Busted"
-   XXXIX. Tom Writes Nonnamous Letters
-   XL. A Mixed-up and Splendid Rescue
-   XLI. "Must 'a' Been Sperits"
-   XLII. Why They Didn't Hang Jim
-   Chapter the Last. Nothing More to Write
-
-
-
-
-ILLUSTRATIONS
-
-
-   Portrait of the Author
-   Huckleberry Finn
-   "'Gimme a Chaw'"
-   Tom Advises a Witch Pie
-
-
-
-
-NOTICE
-
-
-Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be
-prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished;
-persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.
-
-   By Order of the Author,
-    Per G. G., Chief of Ordnance.
-
-
-
-
-EXPLANATORY
-
-
-In this book a number of dialects are used, to wit: the Missouri negro
-dialect; the extremest form of the backwoods Southwestern dialect; the
-ordinary "Pike County" dialect; and four modified varieties of this
-last. The shadings have not been done in a haphazard fashion, or by
-guesswork; but painstakingly, and with the trustworthy guidance and
-support of personal familiarity with these several forms of speech.
-
-I make this explanation for the reason that without it many readers
-would suppose that all these characters were trying to talk alike and
-not succeeding.
-
-   The Author.
-
-
-
-
-HUCKLEBERRY FINN
-
-
-CHAPTER I
-
-
-You don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of
-_The Adventures of Tom Sawyer;_ but that ain't no matter. That book
-was made by Mr. Mark Twain, and he told the truth, mainly. There was
-things which he stretched, but mainly he told the truth. That is
-nothing. I never seen anybody but lied one time or another, without it
-was Aunt Polly, or the widow, or maybe Mary. Aunt Polly--Tom's Aunt
-Polly, she is--and Mary, and the Widow Douglas is all told about in
-that book, which is mostly a true book, with some stretchers, as I
-said before.
-
-Now the way that the book winds up is this: Tom and me found the money
-that the robbers hid in the cave, and it made us rich. We got six
-thousand dollars apiece--all gold. It was an awful sight of money when
-it was piled up. Well, Judge Thatcher he took it and put it out at
-interest, and it fetched us a dollar a day apiece all the year
-round--more than a body could tell what to do with. The Widow Douglas
-she took me for her son, and allowed she would sivilize me; but it was
-rough living in the house all the time, considering how dismal regular
-and decent the widow was in all her ways; and so when I couldn't stand
-it no longer I lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead
-again, and was free and satisfied. But Tom Sawyer he hunted me up and
-said he was going to start a band of robbers, and I might join if I
-would go back to the widow and be respectable. So I went back.
-
-The widow she cried over me, and called me a poor lost lamb, and she
-called me a lot of other names, too, but she never meant no harm by
-it. She put me in them new clothes again, and I couldn't do nothing
-but sweat and sweat, and feel all cramped up. Well, then, the old
-thing commenced again. The widow rung a bell for supper, and you had
-to come to time. When you got to the table you couldn't go right to
-eating, but you had to wait for the widow to tuck down her head and
-grumble a little over the victuals, though there warn't really
-anything the matter with them--that is, nothing only everything was
-cooked by itself. In a barrel of odds and ends it is different; things
-get mixed up, and the juice kind of swaps around, and the things go
-better.
-
-After supper she got out her book and learned me about Moses and the
-Bulrushers, and I was in a sweat to find out all about him; but by and
-by she let it out that Moses had been dead a considerable long time;
-so then I didn't care no more about him, because I don't take no stock
-in dead people.
-
-Pretty soon I wanted to smoke, and asked the widow to let me. But she
-wouldn't. She said it was a mean practice and wasn't clean, and I must
-try to not do it any more. That is just the way with some people. They
-get down on a thing when they don't know nothing about it. Here she
-was a-bothering about Moses, which was no kin to her, and no use to
-anybody, being gone, you see, yet finding a power of fault with me for
-doing a thing that had some good in it. And she took snuff, too; of
-course that was all right, because she done it herself.
-
-Her sister, Miss Watson, a tolerable slim old maid, with goggles on,
-had just come to live with her, and took a set at me now with a
-spelling-book. She worked me middling hard for about an hour, and then
-the widow made her ease up. I couldn't stood it much longer. Then for
-an hour it was deadly dull, and I was fidgety. Miss Watson would say,
-"Don't put your feet up there, Huckleberry"; and "Don't scrunch up
-like that, Huckleberry--set up straight"; and pretty soon she would
-say, "Don't gap and stretch like that, Huckleberry--why don't you try
-to behave?" Then she told me all about the bad place, and I said I
-wished I was there. She got mad then, but I didn't mean no harm. All I
-wanted was to go somewheres; all I wanted was a change, I warn't
-particular. She said it was wicked to say what I said; said she
-wouldn't say it for the whole world; she was going to live so as to go
-to the good place. Well, I couldn't see no advantage in going where
-she was going, so I made up my mind I wouldn't try for it. But I never
-said so, because it would only make trouble, and wouldn't do no good.
-
-Now she had got a start, and she went on and told me all about the
-good place. She said all a body would have to do there was to go
-around all day long with a harp and sing, forever and ever. So I
-didn't think much of it. But I never said so. I asked her if she
-reckoned Tom Sawyer would go there, and she said not by a considerable
-sight. I was glad about that, because I wanted him and me to be
-together.
-
-Miss Watson she kept pecking at me, and it got tiresome and lonesome.
-By and by they fetched the niggers in and had prayers, and then
-everybody was off to bed. I went up to my room with a piece of candle,
-and put it on the table. Then I set down in a chair by the window and
-tried to think of something cheerful, but it warn't no use. I felt so
-lonesome I most wished I was dead. The stars were shining, and the
-leaves rustled in the woods ever so mournful; and I heard an owl, away
-off, who-whooing about somebody that was dead, and a whippowill and a
-dog crying about somebody that was going to die; and the wind was
-trying to whisper something to me, and I couldn't make out what it
-was, and so it made the cold shivers run over me. Then away out in the
-woods I heard that kind of a sound that a ghost makes when it wants to
-tell about something that's on its mind and can't make itself
-understood, and so can't rest easy in its grave, and has to go about
-that way every night grieving. I got so downhearted and scared I did
-wish I had some company. Pretty soon a spider went crawling up my
-shoulder, and I flipped it off and it lit in the candle; and before I
-could budge it was all shriveled up. I didn't need anybody to tell me
-that that was an awful bad sign and would fetch me some bad luck, so I
-was scared and most shook the clothes off of me. I got up and turned
-around in my tracks three times and crossed my breast every time; and
-then I tied up a little lock of my hair with a thread to keep witches
-away. But I hadn't no confidence. You do that when you've lost a
-horseshoe that you've found, instead of nailing it up over the door,
-but I hadn't ever heard anybody say it was any way to keep off bad
-luck when you'd killed a spider.
-
-I set down again, a-shaking all over, and got out my pipe for a smoke;
-for the house was all as still as death now, and so the widow wouldn't
-know. Well, after a long time I heard the clock away off in the town
-go boom--boom--boom--twelve licks; and all still again--stiller than
-ever. Pretty soon I heard a twig snap down in the dark amongst the
-trees--something was a-stirring. I set still and listened. Directly I
-could just barely hear a "me-yow! me-yow!" down there. That was good!
-Says I, "me-yow! me-yow!" as soft as I could, and then I put out the
-light and scrambled out of the window on to the shed. Then I slipped
-down to the ground and crawled in among the trees, and, sure enough,
-there was Tom Sawyer waiting for me.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER II
-
-
-We went tiptoeing along a path amongst the trees back toward the end
-of the widow's garden, stooping down so as the branches wouldn't
-scrape our heads. When we was passing by the kitchen I fell over a
-root and made a noise. We scrouched down and laid still. Miss Watson's
-big nigger, named Jim, was setting in the kitchen door; we could see
-him pretty clear, because there was a light behind him. He got up and
-stretched his neck out about a minute, listening. Then he says:
-
-"Who dah?"
-
-He listened some more; then he came tiptoeing down and stood right
-between us; we could 'a' touched him, nearly. Well, likely it was
-minutes and minutes that there warn't a sound, and we all there so
-close together. There was a place on my ankle that got to itching, but
-I dasn't scratch it; and then my ear begun to itch; and next my back,
-right between my shoulders. Seemed like I'd die if I couldn't scratch.
-Well, I've noticed that thing plenty times since. If you are with the
-quality, or at a funeral, or trying to go to sleep when you ain't
-sleepy--if you are anywheres where it won't do for you to scratch, why
-you will itch all over in upward of a thousand places. Pretty soon Jim
-says:
-
-"Say, who is you? Whar is you? Dog my cats ef I didn' hear sumf'n.
-Well, I know what I's gwyne to do: I's gwyne to set down here and
-listen tell I hears it ag'in."
-
-So he set down on the ground betwixt me and Tom. He leaned his back up
-against a tree, and stretched his legs out till one of them most
-touched one of mine. My nose begun to itch. It itched till the tears
-come into my eyes. But I dasn't scratch. Then it begun to itch on the
-inside. Next I got to itching underneath. I didn't know how I was
-going to set still. This miserableness went on as much as six or seven
-minutes; but it seemed a sight longer than that. I was itching in
-eleven different places now. I reckoned I couldn't stand it more'n a
-minute longer, but I set my teeth hard and got ready to try. Just then
-Jim begun to breathe heavy; next he begun to snore--and then I was
-pretty soon comfortable again.
-
-Tom he made a sign to me--kind of a little noise with his mouth--and
-we went creeping away on our hands and knees. When we was ten foot off
-Tom whispered to me, and wanted to tie Jim to the tree for fun. But I
-said no; he might wake and make a disturbance, and then they'd find
-out I warn't in. Then Tom said he hadn't got candles enough, and he
-would slip in the kitchen and get some more. I didn't want him to try.
-I said Jim might wake up and come. But Tom wanted to resk it; so we
-slid in there and got three candles, and Tom laid five cents on the
-table for pay. Then we got out, and I was in a sweat to get away; but
-nothing would do Tom but he must crawl to where Jim was, on his hands
-and knees, and play something on him. I waited, and it seemed a good
-while, everything was so still and lonesome.
-
-As soon as Tom was back we cut along the path, around the garden
-fence, and by and by fetched up on the steep top of the hill the other
-side of the house. Tom said he slipped Jim's hat off of his head and
-hung it on a limb right over him, and Jim stirred a little, but he
-didn't wake. Afterward Jim said the witches bewitched him and put him
-in a trance, and rode him all over the state, and then set him under
-the trees again, and hung his hat on a limb to show who done it. And
-next time Jim told it he said they rode him down to New Orleans; and,
-after that, every time he told it he spread it more and more, till by
-and by he said they rode him all over the world, and tired him most to
-death, and his back was all over saddle-boils. Jim was monstrous proud
-about it, and he got so he wouldn't hardly notice the other niggers.
-Niggers would come miles to hear Jim tell about it, and he was more
-looked up to than any nigger in that country. Strange niggers would
-stand with their mouths open and look him all over, same as if he was
-a wonder. Niggers is always talking about witches in the dark by the
-kitchen fire; but whenever one was talking and letting on to know all
-about such things, Jim would happen in and say, "Hm! What you know
-'bout witches?" and that nigger was corked up and had to take a back
-seat. Jim always kept that five-center piece round his neck with a
-string, and said it was a charm the devil give to him with his own
-hands, and told him he could cure anybody with it and fetch witches
-whenever he wanted to just by saying something to it; but he never
-told what it was he said to it. Niggers would come from all around
-there and give Jim anything they had, just for a sight of that
-five-center piece; but they wouldn't touch it, because the devil had
-had his hands on it. Jim was most ruined for a servant, because he got
-stuck up on account of having seen the devil and been rode by witches.
-
-Well, when Tom and me got to the edge of the hilltop we looked away
-down into the village and could see three or four lights twinkling,
-where there was sick folks, maybe; and the stars over us was sparkling
-ever so fine; and down by the village was the river, a whole mile
-broad, and awful still and grand. We went down the hill and found Joe
-Harper and Ben Rogers, and two or three more of the boys, hid in the
-old tanyard. So we unhitched a skiff and pulled down the river two
-mile and a half, to the big scar on the hillside, and went ashore.
-
-We went to a clump of bushes, and Tom made everybody swear to keep the
-secret, and then showed them a hole in the hill, right in the thickest
-part of the bushes. Then we lit the candles, and crawled in on our
-hands and knees. We went about two hundred yards, and then the cave
-opened up. Tom poked about amongst the passages, and pretty soon
-ducked under a wall where you wouldn't 'a' noticed that there was a
-hole. We went along a narrow place and got into a kind of room, all
-damp and sweaty and cold, and there we stopped. Tom says:
-
-"Now, we'll start this band of robbers and call it Tom Sawyer's Gang.
-Everybody that wants to join has got to take an oath, and write his
-name in blood." Everybody was willing. So Tom got out a sheet of paper
-that he had wrote the oath on, and read it. It swore every boy to
-stick to the band, and never tell any of the secrets; and if anybody
-done anything to any boy in the band, whichever boy was ordered to
-kill that person and his family must do it, and he mustn't eat and he
-mustn't sleep till he had killed them and hacked a cross in their
-breasts, which was the sign of the band. And nobody that didn't belong
-to the band could use that mark, and if he did he must be sued; and if
-he done it again he must be killed. And if anybody that belonged to
-the band told the secrets, he must have his throat cut, and then have
-his carcass burnt up and the ashes scattered all around, and his name
-blotted off the list with blood and never mentioned again by the gang,
-but have a curse put on it and be forgot forever.
-
-Everybody said it was a real beautiful oath, and asked Tom if he got
-it out of his own head. He said some of it, but the rest was out of
-pirate-books and robber-books, and every gang that was high-toned had
-it.
-
-Some thought it would be good to kill the _families_ of boys that told
-the secrets. Tom said it was a good idea, so he took a pencil and
-wrote it in. Then Ben Rogers says:
-
-"Here's Huck Finn, he hain't got no family; what you going to do 'bout
-him?"
-
-"Well, hain't he got a father?" says Tom Sawyer.
-
-"Yes, he's got a father, but you can't never find him these days. He
-used to lay drunk with the hogs in the tanyard, but he hain't been
-seen in these parts for a year or more."
-
-They talked it over, and they was going to rule me out, because they
-said every boy must have a family or somebody to kill, or else it
-wouldn't be fair and square for the others. Well, nobody could think
-of anything to do--everybody was stumped, and set still. I was most
-ready to cry; but all at once I thought of a way, and so I offered
-them Miss Watson--they could kill her. Everybody said:
-
-"Oh, she'll do. That's all right. Huck can come in."
-
-Then they all stuck a pin in their fingers to get blood to sign with,
-and I made my mark on the paper.
-
-"Now," says Ben Rogers, "what's the line of business of this Gang?"
-
-"Nothing only robbery and murder," Tom said.
-
-"But who are we going to rob?--houses, or cattle, or--"
-
-"Stuff! stealing cattle and such things ain't robbery; it's burglary,"
-says Tom Sawyer. "We ain't burglars. That ain't no sort of style. We
-are highwaymen. We stop stages and carriages on the road, with masks
-on, and kill the people and take their watches and money."
-
-"Must we always kill the people?"
-
-"Oh, certainly. It's best. Some authorities think different, but
-mostly it's considered best to kill them--except some that you bring
-to the cave here, and keep them till they're ransomed."
-
-"Ransomed? What's that?"
-
-"I don't know. But that's what they do. I've seen it in books; and so
-of course that's what we've got to do."
-
-"But how can we do it if we don't know what it is?"
-
-"Why, blame it all, we've _got_ to do it. Don't I tell you it's in the
-books?  Do you want to go to doing different from what's in the books,
-and get things all muddled up?"
-
-"Oh, that's all very fine to _say,_ Tom Sawyer, but how in the nation
-are these fellows going to be ransomed if we don't know how to do it
-to them?--that's the thing I want to get at. Now, what do you reckon
-it is?"
-
-"Well, I don't know. But per'aps if we keep them till they're
-ransomed, it means that we keep them till they're dead."
-
-"Now, that's something _like._ That'll answer. Why couldn't you said
-that before? We'll keep them till they're ransomed to death; and a
-bothersome lot they'll be, too--eating up everything, and always
-trying to get loose."
-
-"How you talk, Ben Rogers. How can they get loose when there's a guard
-over them, ready to shoot them down if they move a peg?"
-
-"A guard! Well, that _is_ good. So somebody's got to set up all night
-and never get any sleep, just so as to watch them. I think that's
-foolishness. Why can't a body take a club and ransom them as soon as
-they get here?"
-
-"Because it ain't in the books so--that's why. Now, Ben Rogers, do you
-want to do things regular, or don't you?--that's the idea. Don't you
-reckon that the people that made the books knows what's the correct
-thing to do? Do you reckon _you_ can learn 'em anything? Not by a good
-deal. No, sir, we'll just go on and ransom them in the regular way."
-
-"All right. I don't mind; but I say it's a fool way, anyhow. Say, do
-we kill the women, too?"
-
-"Well, Ben Rogers, if I was as ignorant as you I wouldn't let on. Kill
-the women? No; nobody ever saw anything in the books like that. You
-fetch them to the cave, and you're always as polite as pie to them;
-and by and by they fall in love with you, and never want to go home
-any more."
-
-"Well, if that's the way I'm agreed, but I don't take no stock in it.
-Mighty soon we'll have the cave so cluttered up with women, and
-fellows waiting to be ransomed, that there won't be no place for the
-robbers. But go ahead, I ain't got nothing to say."
-
-Little Tommy Barnes was asleep now, and when they waked him up he was
-scared, and cried, and said he wanted to go home to his ma, and didn't
-want to be a robber any more.
-
-So they all made fun of him, and called him cry-baby, and that made
-him mad, and he said he would go straight and tell all the secrets.
-But Tom give him five cents to keep quiet, and said we would all go
-home and meet next week, and rob somebody and kill some people.
-
-Ben Rogers said he couldn't get out much, only Sundays, and so he
-wanted to begin next Sunday; but all the boys said it would be wicked
-to do it on Sunday, and that settled the thing. They agreed to get
-together and fix a day as soon as they could, and then we elected Tom
-Sawyer first captain and Joe Harper second captain of the Gang, and so
-started home.
-
-I clumb up the shed and crept into my window just before day was
-breaking. My new clothes was all greased up and clayey, and I was
-dog-tired.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER III
-
-
-Well, I got a good going-over in the morning from old Miss Watson on
-account of my clothes; but the widow she didn't scold, but only
-cleaned off the grease and clay, and looked so sorry that I thought I
-would behave awhile if I could. Then Miss Watson she took me in the
-closet and prayed, but nothing come of it. She told me to pray every
-day, and whatever I asked for I would get it. But it warn't so. I
-tried it. Once I got a fish-line, but no hooks. It warn't any good to
-me without hooks. I tried for the hooks three or four times, but
-somehow I couldn't make it work. By and by, one day, I asked Miss
-Watson to try for me, but she said I was a fool. She never told me
-why, and I couldn't make it out no way.
-
-I set down one time back in the woods, and had a long think about it.
-I says to myself, if a body can get anything they pray for, why don't
-Deacon Winn get back the money he lost on pork? Why can't the widow
-get back her silver snuff-box that was stole? Why can't Miss Watson
-fat up? No, says I to myself, there ain't nothing in it. I went and
-told the widow about it, and she said the thing a body could get by
-praying for it was "spiritual gifts." This was too many for me, but
-she told me what she meant--I must help other people, and do
-everything I could for other people, and look out for them all the
-time, and never think about myself. This was including Miss Watson, as
-I took it. I went out in the woods and turned it over in my mind a
-long time, but I couldn't see no advantage about it--except for the
-other people; so at last I reckoned I wouldn't worry about it any
-more, but just let it go. Sometimes the widow would take me one side
-and talk about Providence in a way to make a body's mouth water; but
-maybe next day Miss Watson would take hold and knock it all down
-again. I judged I could see that there was two Providences, and a poor
-chap would stand considerable show with the widow's Providence, but if
-Miss Watson's got him there warn't no help for him any more. I thought
-it all out, and reckoned I would belong to the widow's if he wanted
-me, though I couldn't make out how he was a-going to be any better off
-then than what he was before, seeing I was so ignorant, and so kind of
-low-down and ornery.
-
-Pap he hadn't been seen for more than a year, and that was comfortable
-for me; I didn't want to see him no more. He used to always whale me
-when he was sober and could get his hands on me; though I used to take
-to the woods most of the time when he was around. Well, about this
-time he was found in the river drownded, about twelve mile above town,
-so people said. They judged it was him, anyway; said this drownded man
-was just his size, and was ragged, and had uncommon long hair, which
-was all like pap; but they couldn't make nothing out of the face,
-because it had been in the water so long it warn't much like a face at
-all. They said he was floating on his back in the water. They took him
-and buried him on the bank. But I warn't comfortable long, because I
-happened to think of something. I knowed mighty well that a drownded
-man don't float on his back, but on his face. So I knowed, then, that
-this warn't pap, but a woman dressed up in a man's clothes. So I was
-uncomfortable again. I judged the old man would turn up again by and
-by, though I wished he wouldn't.
-
-We played robber now and then about a month, and then I resigned. All
-the boys did. We hadn't robbed nobody, hadn't killed any people, but
-only just pretended. We used to hop out of the woods and go charging
-down on hog-drivers and women in carts taking garden stuff to market,
-but we never hived any of them. Tom Sawyer called the hogs "ingots,"
-and he called the turnips and stuff "julery," and we would go to the
-cave and powwow over what we had done, and how many people we had
-killed and marked. But I couldn't see no profit in it. One time Tom
-sent a boy to run about town with a blazing stick, which he called a
-slogan (which was the sign for the Gang to get together), and then he
-said he had got secret news by his spies that next day a whole parcel
-of Spanish merchants and rich A-rabs was going to camp in Cave Hollow
-with two hundred elephants, and six hundred camels, and over a
-thousand "sumter" mules, all loaded down with di'monds, and they
-didn't have only a guard of four hundred soldiers, and so we would lay
-in ambuscade, as he called it, and kill the lot and scoop the things.
-He said we must slick up our swords and guns, and get ready. He never
-could go after even a turnip-cart but he must have the swords and guns
-all scoured up for it, though they was only lath and broomsticks, and
-you might scour at them till you rotted, and then they warn't worth a
-mouthful of ashes more than what they was before. I didn't believe we
-could lick such a crowd of Spaniards and A-rabs, but I wanted to see
-the camels and elephants, so I was on hand next day, Saturday, in the
-ambuscade; and when we got the word we rushed out of the woods and
-down the hill. But there warn't no Spaniards and A-rabs, and there
-warn't no camels nor no elephants. It warn't anything but a
-Sunday-school picnic, and only a primer class at that. We busted it
-up, and chased the children up the hollow; but we never got anything
-but some doughnuts and jam, though Ben Rogers got a rag doll, and Joe
-Harper got a hymn-book and a tract; and then the teacher charged in,
-and made us drop everything and cut. I didn't see no di'monds, and I
-told Tom Sawyer so. He said there was loads of them there, anyway; and
-he said there was A-rabs there, too, and elephants and things. I said,
-why couldn't we see them, then? He said if I warn't so ignorant, but
-had read a book called Don Quixote, I would know without asking. He
-said it was all done by enchantment. He said there was hundreds of
-soldiers there, and elephants and treasure, and so on, but we had
-enemies which he called magicians, and they had turned the whole thing
-into an infant Sunday-school, just out of spite. I said, all right;
-then the thing for us to do was to go for the magicians. Tom Sawyer
-said I was a numskull.
-
-"Why," said he, "a magician could call up a lot of genies, and they
-would hash you up like nothing before you could say Jack Robinson.
-They are as tall as a tree and as big around as a church."
-
-"Well," I says, "s'pose we got some genies to help _us_--can't we lick
-the other crowd then?"
-
-"How you going to get them?"
-
-"I don't know. How do _they_ get them?"
-
-"Why, they rub an old tin lamp or an iron ring, and then the genies
-come tearing in, with the thunder and lightning a-ripping around and
-the smoke a-rolling, and everything they're told to do they up and do
-it. They don't think nothing of pulling a shot-tower up by the roots,
-and belting a Sunday-school superintendent over the head with it--or
-any other man."
-
-"Who makes them tear around so?"
-
-"Why, whoever rubs the lamp or the ring. They belong to whoever rubs
-the lamp or the ring, and they've got to do whatever he says. If he
-tells them to build a palace forty miles long out of di'monds, and
-fill it full of chewing-gum, or whatever you want, and fetch an
-emperor's daughter from China for you to marry, they've got to do
-it--and they've got to do it before sun-up next morning, too. And
-more: they've got to waltz that palace around over the country
-wherever you want it, you understand."
-
-"Well," says I, "I think they are a pack of flatheads for not keeping
-the palace themselves 'stead of fooling them away like that. And
-what's more--if I was one of them I would see a man in Jericho before
-I would drop my business and come to him for the rubbing of an old tin
-lamp."
-
-"How you talk, Huck Finn. Why, you'd _have_ to come when he rubbed it,
-whether you wanted to or not."
-
-"What! and I as high as a tree and as big as a church? All right,
-then; I _would_ come; but I lay I'd make that man climb the highest
-tree there was in the country."
-
-"Shucks, it ain't no use to talk to you, Huck Finn. You don't seem to
-know anything, somehow--perfect saphead."
-
-I thought all this over for two or three days, and then I reckoned I
-would see if there was anything in it. I got an old tin lamp and an
-iron ring, and went out in the woods and rubbed and rubbed till I
-sweat like an Injun, calculating to build a palace and sell it; but it
-warn't no use, none of the genies come. So then I judged that all that
-stuff was only just one of Tom Sawyer's lies. I reckoned he believed
-in the A-rabs and the elephants, but as for me I think different. It
-had all the marks of a Sunday-school.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER IV
-
-
-Well, three or four months run along, and it was well into the winter
-now. I had been to school most all the time and could spell and read
-and write just a little, and could say the multiplication table up to
-six times seven is thirty-five, and I don't reckon I could ever get
-any further than that if I was to live forever. I don't take no stock
-in mathematics, anyway.
-
-At first I hated the school, but by and by I got so I could stand it.
-Whenever I got uncommon tired I played hookey, and the hiding I got
-next day done me good and cheered me up. So the longer I went to
-school the easier it got to be. I was getting sort of used to the
-widow's ways, too, and they warn't so raspy on me. Living in a house
-and sleeping in a bed pulled on me pretty tight mostly, but before the
-cold weather I used to slide out and sleep in the woods sometimes, and
-so that was a rest to me. I liked the old ways best, but I was getting
-so I liked the new ones, too, a little bit. The widow said I was
-coming along slow but sure, and doing very satisfactory. She said she
-warn't ashamed of me.
-
-One morning I happened to turn over the salt-cellar at breakfast. I
-reached for some of it as quick as I could to throw over my left
-shoulder and keep off the bad luck, but Miss Watson was in ahead of
-me, and crossed me off. She says, "Take your hands away, Huckleberry;
-what a mess you are always making!" The widow put in a good word for
-me, but that warn't going to keep off the bad luck, I knowed that well
-enough. I started out, after breakfast, feeling worried and shaky, and
-wondering where it was going to fall on me, and what it was going to
-be. There is ways to keep off some kinds of bad luck, but this wasn't
-one of them kind; so I never tried to do anything, but just poked
-along low-spirited and on the watch-out.
-
-I went down to the front garden and clumb over the stile where you go
-through the high board fence. There was an inch of new snow on the
-ground, and I seen somebody's tracks. They had come up from the quarry
-and stood around the stile awhile, and then went on around the garden
-fence. It was funny they hadn't come in, after standing around so. I
-couldn't make it out. It was very curious, somehow. I was going to
-follow around, but I stooped down to look at the tracks first. I
-didn't notice anything at first, but next I did. There was a cross in
-the left boot-heel made with big nails, to keep off the devil.
-
-I was up in a second and shinning down the hill. I looked over my
-shoulder every now and then, but I didn't see nobody. I was at Judge
-Thatcher's as quick as I could get there. He said:
-
-"Why, my boy, you are all out of breath. Did you come for your
-interest?"
-
-"No, sir," I says; "is there some for me?"
-
-"Oh, yes, a half-yearly is in last night--over a hundred and fifty
-dollars. Quite a fortune for you. You had better let me invest it
-along with your six thousand, because if you take it you'll spend it."
-
-"No, sir," I says, "I don't want to spend it. I don't want it at
-all--nor the six thousand, nuther. I want you to take it; I want to
-give it to you--the six thousand and all."
-
-He looked surprised. He couldn't seem to make it out. He says:
-
-"Why, what can you mean, my boy?"
-
-I says, "Don't you ask me no questions about it, please. You'll take
-it--won't you?"
-
-He says:
-
-"Well, I'm puzzled. Is something the matter?"
-
-"Please take it," says I, "and don't ask me nothing--then I won't have
-to tell no lies."
-
-He studied awhile, and then he says:
-
-"Oho-o! I think I see. You want to _sell_ all your property to me--not
-give it. That's the correct idea."
-
-Then he wrote something on a paper and read it over, and says:
-
-"There; you see it says 'for a consideration.' That means I have
-bought it of you and paid you for it. Here's a dollar for you. Now you
-sign it."
-
-So I signed it, and left.
-
-Miss Watson's nigger, Jim, had a hair-ball as big as your fist, which
-had been took out of the fourth stomach of an ox, and he used to do
-magic with it. He said there was a spirit inside of it, and it knowed
-everything. So I went to him that night and told him pap was here
-again, for I found his tracks in the snow. What I wanted to know was,
-what he was going to do, and was he going to stay? Jim got out his
-hair-ball and said something over it, and then he held it up and
-dropped it on the floor. It fell pretty solid, and only rolled about
-an inch. Jim tried it again, and then another time, and it acted just
-the same. Jim got down on his knees, and put his ear against it and
-listened. But it warn't no use; he said it wouldn't talk. He said
-sometimes it wouldn't talk without money. I told him I had an old
-slick counterfeit quarter that warn't no good because the brass showed
-through the silver a little, and it wouldn't pass nohow, even if the
-brass didn't show, because it was so slick it felt greasy, and so that
-would tell on it every time. (I reckoned I wouldn't say nothing about
-the dollar I got from the judge.) I said it was pretty bad money, but
-maybe the hair-ball would take it, because maybe it wouldn't know the
-difference. Jim smelt it and bit it and rubbed it, and said he would
-manage so the hair-ball would think it was good. He said he would
-split open a raw Irish potato and stick the quarter in between and
-keep it there all night, and next morning you couldn't see no brass,
-and it wouldn't feel greasy no more, and so anybody in town would take
-it in a minute, let alone a hair-ball. Well, I knowed a potato would
-do that before, but I had forgot it.
-
-Jim put the quarter under the hair-ball, and got down and listened
-again. This time he said the hair-ball was all right. He said it would
-tell my whole fortune if I wanted it to. I says, go on. So the
-hair-ball talked to Jim, and Jim told it to me. He says:
-
-"Yo' ole father doan' know yit what he's a-gwyne to do. Sometimes he
-spec he'll go 'way, en den ag'in he spec he'll stay. De bes' way is to
-res' easy en let de ole man take his own way. Dey's two angels
-hoverin' roun' 'bout him. One uv 'em is white en shiny, en t'other one
-is black. De white one gits him to go right a little while, den de
-black one sail in en bust it all up. A body can't tell yit which one
-gwyne to fetch him at de las'. But you is all right. You gwyne to have
-considable trouble in yo' life, en considable joy. Sometimes you gwyne
-to git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick; but every time you's
-gwyne to git well ag'in. Dey's two gals flyin' 'bout you in yo' life.
-One uv 'em's light en t'other one is dark. One is rich en t'other is
-po'. You's gwyne to marry de po' one fust en de rich one by en by. You
-wants to keep 'way fum de water as much as you kin, en don't run no
-resk, 'kase it's down in de bills dat you's gwyne to git hung."
-
-When I lit my candle and went up to my room that night there sat
-pap--his own self!
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER V
-
-
-I had shut the door to. Then I turned around, and there he was. I used
-to be scared of him all the time, he tanned me so much. I reckoned I
-was scared now, too; but in a minute I see I was mistaken--that is,
-after the first jolt, as you may say, when my breath sort of hitched,
-he being so unexpected; but right away after I see I warn't scared of
-him worth bothring about.
-
-He was most fifty, and he looked it. His hair was long and tangled and
-greasy, and hung down, and you could see his eyes shining through like
-he was behind vines. It was all black, no gray; so was his long,
-mixed-up whiskers. There warn't no color in his face, where his face
-showed; it was white; not like another man's white, but a white to
-make a body sick, a white to make a body's flesh crawl--a tree-toad
-white, a fish-belly white. As for his clothes--just rags, that was
-all. He had one ankle resting on t'other knee; the boot on that foot
-was busted, and two of his toes stuck through, and he worked them now
-and then. His hat was laying on the floor--an old black slouch with
-the top caved in, like a lid.
-
-I stood a-looking at him; he set there a-looking at me, with his chair
-tilted back a little. I set the candle down. I noticed the window was
-up; so he had clumb in by the shed. He kept a-looking me all over. By
-and by he says:
-
-"Starchy clothes--very. You think you're a good deal of a big-bug,
-_don't_ you?"
-
-"Maybe I am, maybe I ain't," I says.
-
-"Don't you give me none o' your lip," says he. "You've put on
-considerable many frills since I been away. I'll take you down a peg
-before I get done with you. You're educated, too, they say--can read
-and write. You think you're better'n your father, now, don't you,
-because he can't? _I'll_ take it out of you. Who told you you might
-meddle with such hifalut'n foolishness, hey?--who told you you could?"
-
-"The widow. She told me."
-
-"The widow, hey?--and who told the widow she could put in her shovel
-about a thing that ain't none of her business?"
-
-"Nobody never told her."
-
-"Well, I'll learn her how to meddle. And looky here--you drop that
-school, you hear? I'll learn people to bring up a boy to put on airs
-over his own father and let on to be better'n what _he_ is. You lemme
-catch you fooling around that school again, you hear? Your mother
-couldn't read, and she couldn't write, nuther, before she died. None
-of the family couldn't before _they_ died. I can't; and here you're
-a-swelling yourself up like this. I ain't the man to stand it--you
-hear? Say, lemme hear you read."
-
-I took up a book and begun something about General Washington and the
-wars. When I'd read about a half a minute, he fetched the book a whack
-with his hand and knocked it across the house. He says:
-
-"It's so. You can do it. I had my doubts when you told me. Now looky
-here; you stop that putting on frills. I won't have it. I'll lay for
-you, my smarty; and if I catch you about that school I'll tan you
-good. First you know you'll get religion, too. I never see such a
-son."
-
-He took up a little blue and yaller picture of some cows and a boy,
-and says:
-
-"What's this?"
-
-"It's something they give me for learning my lessons good."
-
-He tore it up, and says:
-
-"I'll give you something better--I'll give you a cowhide."
-
-He set there a-mumbling and a-growling a minute, and then he says:
-
-"_Ain't_ you a sweet-scented dandy, though? A bed; and bedclothes; and
-a look'n'-glass; and a piece of carpet on the floor--and your own
-father got to sleep with the hogs in the tanyard. I never see such a
-son. I bet I'll take some o' these frills out o' you before I'm done
-with you. Why, there ain't no end to your airs--they say you're rich.
-Hey?--how's that?"
-
-"They lie--that's how."
-
-"Looky here--mind how you talk to me; I'm a-standing about all I can
-stand now--so don't gimme no sass. I've been in town two days, and I
-hain't heard nothing but about you bein' rich. I heard about it away
-down the river, too. That's why I come. You git me that money
-to-morrow--I want it."
-
-"I hain't got no money."
-
-"It's a lie. Judge Thatcher's got it. You git it. I want it."
-
-"I hain't got no money, I tell you. You ask Judge Thatcher; he'll tell
-you the same."
-
-"All right. I'll ask him; and I'll make him pungle, too, or I'll know
-the reason why. Say, how much you got in your pocket? I want it."
-
-"I hain't got only a dollar, and I want that to--"
-
-"It don't make no difference what you want it for--you just shell it
-out."
-
-He took it and bit it to see if it was good, and then he said he was
-going down-town to get some whisky; said he hadn't had a drink all
-day. When he had got out on the shed he put his head in again, and
-cussed me for putting on frills and trying to be better than him; and
-when I reckoned he was gone he come back and put his head in again,
-and told me to mind about that school, because he was going to lay for
-me and lick me if I didn't drop that.
-
-Next day he was drunk, and he went to Judge Thatcher's and bullyragged
-him, and tried to make him give up the money; but he couldn't, and
-then he swore he'd make the law force him.
-
-The judge and the widow went to law to get the court to take me away
-from him and let one of them be my guardian; but it was a new judge
-that had just come, and he didn't know the old man; so he said courts
-mustn't interfere and separate families if they could help it; said
-he'd druther not take a child away from its father. So Judge Thatcher
-and the widow had to quit on the business.
-
-That pleased the old man till he couldn't rest. He said he'd cowhide
-me till I was black and blue if I didn't raise some money for him. I
-borrowed three dollars from Judge Thatcher, and pap took it and got
-drunk, and went a-blowing around and cussing and whooping and carrying
-on; and he kept it up all over town, with a tin pan, till most
-midnight; then they jailed him, and next day they had him before
-court, and jailed him again for a week. But he said _he_ was
-satisfied; said he was boss of his son, and he'd make it warm for
-_him._
-
-When he got out the new judge said he was a-going to make a man of
-him. So he took him to his own house, and dressed him up clean and
-nice, and had him to breakfast and dinner and supper with the family,
-and was just old pie to him, so to speak. And after supper he talked
-to him about temperance and such things till the old man cried, and
-said he'd been a fool, and fooled away his life; but now he was
-a-going to turn over a new leaf and be a man nobody wouldn't be
-ashamed of, and he hoped the judge would help him and not look down on
-him. The judge said he could hug him for them words; so he cried, and
-his wife she cried again; pap said he'd been a man that had always
-been misunderstood before, and the judge said he believed it. The old
-man said that what a man wanted that was down was sympathy, and the
-judge said it was so; so they cried again. And when it was bedtime the
-old man rose up and held out his hand, and says:
-
-"Look at it, gentlemen and ladies all; take a-hold of it; shake it.
-There's a hand that was the hand of a hog; but it ain't so no more;
-it's the hand of a man that's started in on a new life, and'll die
-before he'll go back. You mark them words--don't forget I said them.
-It's a clean hand now; shake it--don't be afeard."
-
-So they shook it, one after the other, all around, and cried. The
-judge's wife she kissed it. Then the old man he signed a pledge--made
-his mark. The judge said it was the holiest time on record, or
-something like that. Then they tucked the old man into a beautiful
-room, which was the spare room, and in the night some time he got
-powerful thirsty and clumb out on to the porch-roof and slid down a
-stanchion and traded his new coat for a jug of forty-rod, and clumb
-back again and had a good old time; and toward daylight he crawled out
-again, drunk as a fiddler, and rolled off the porch and broke his left
-arm in two places, and was most froze to death when somebody found him
-after sun-up. And when they come to look at that spare room they had
-to take soundings before they could navigate it.
-
-The judge he felt kind of sore. He said he reckoned a body could
-reform the old man with a shotgun, maybe, but he didn't know no other
-way.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER VI
-
-
-Well, pretty soon the old man was up and around again, and then he
-went for Judge Thatcher in the courts to make him give up that money,
-and he went for me, too, for not stopping school. He catched me a
-couple of times and thrashed me, but I went to school just the same,
-and dodged him or outrun him most of the time. I didn't want to go to
-school much before, but I reckoned I'd go now to spite pap. That law
-trial was a slow business--appeared like they warn't ever going to get
-started on it; so every now and then I'd borrow two or three dollars
-off of the judge for him, to keep from getting a cowhiding. Every time
-he got money he got drunk; and every time he got drunk he raised Cain
-around town; and every time he raised Cain he got jailed. He was just
-suited--this kind of thing was right in his line.
-
-He got to hanging around the widow's too much, and so she told him at
-last that if he didn't quit using around there she would make trouble
-for him. Well, _wasn't_ he mad? He said he would show who was Huck
-Finn's boss. So he watched out for me one day in the spring, and
-catched me, and took me up the river about three mile in a skiff, and
-crossed over to the Illinois shore where it was woody and there warn't
-no houses but an old log hut in a place where the timber was so thick
-you couldn't find it if you didn't know where it was.
-
-He kept me with him all the time, and I never got a chance to run off.
-We lived in that old cabin, and he always locked the door and put the
-key under his head nights. He had a gun which he had stole, I reckon,
-and we fished and hunted, and that was what we lived on. Every little
-while he locked me in and went down to the store, three miles, to the
-ferry, and traded fish and game for whisky, and fetched it home and
-got drunk and had a good time, and licked me. The widow she found out
-where I was by and by, and she sent a man over to try to get hold of
-me; but pap drove him off with the gun, and it warn't long after that
-till I was used to being where I was, and liked it--all but the
-cowhide part.
-
-It was kind of lazy and jolly, laying off comfortable all day, smoking
-and fishing, and no books nor study. Two months or more run along, and
-my clothes got to be all rags and dirt, and I didn't see how I'd ever
-got to like it so well at the widow's, where you had to wash, and eat
-on a plate, and comb up, and go to bed and get up regular, and be
-forever bothering over a book, and have old Miss Watson pecking at you
-all the time. I didn't want to go back no more. I had stopped cussing,
-because the widow didn't like it; but now I took to it again because
-pap hadn't no objections. It was pretty good times up in the woods
-there, take it all around.
-
-But by and by pap got too handy with his hick'ry, and I couldn't stand
-it. I was all over welts. He got to going away so much, too, and
-locking me in. Once he locked me in and was gone three days. It was
-dreadful lonesome. I judged he had got drownded, and I wasn't ever
-going to get out any more. I was scared. I made up my mind I would fix
-up some way to leave there. I had tried to get out of that cabin many
-a time, but I couldn't find no way. There warn't a window to it big
-enough for a dog to get through. I couldn't get up the chimbly; it was
-too narrow. The door was thick, solid oak slabs. Pap was pretty
-careful not to leave a knife or anything in the cabin when he was
-away; I reckon I had hunted the place over as much as a hundred times;
-well, I was most all the time at it, because it was about the only way
-to put in the time. But this time I found something at last; I found
-an old rusty wood-saw without any handle; it was laid in between a
-rafter and the clapboards of the roof. I greased it up and went to
-work. There was an old horse-blanket nailed against the logs at the
-far end of the cabin behind the table, to keep the wind from blowing
-through the chinks and putting the candle out. I got under the table
-and raised the blanket, and went to work to saw a section of the big
-bottom log out--big enough to let me through. Well, it was a good long
-job, but I was getting toward the end of it when I heard pap's gun in
-the woods. I got rid of the signs of my work, and dropped the blanket
-and hid my saw, and pretty soon pap come in.
-
-Pap warn't in a good humor--so he was his natural self. He said he was
-down-town, and everything was going wrong. His lawyer said he reckoned
-he would win his lawsuit and get the money if they ever got started on
-the trial; but then there was ways to put it off a long time, and
-Judge Thatcher knowed how to do it. And he said people allowed there'd
-be another trial to get me away from him and give me to the widow for
-my guardian, and they guessed it would win this time. This shook me up
-considerable, because I didn't want to go back to the widow's any more
-and be so cramped up and sivilized, as they called it. Then the old
-man got to cussing, and cussed everything and everybody he could think
-of, and then cussed them all over again to make sure he hadn't skipped
-any, and after that he polished off with a kind of a general cuss all
-round, including a considerable parcel of people which he didn't know
-the names of, and so called them what's-his-name when he got to them,
-and went right along with his cussing.
-
-He said he would like to see the widow get me. He said he would watch
-out, and if they tried to come any such game on him he knowed of a
-place six or seven mile off to stow me in, where they might hunt till
-they dropped and they couldn't find me. That made me pretty uneasy
-again, but only for a minute; I reckoned I wouldn't stay on hand till
-he got that chance.
-
-The old man made me go to the skiff and fetch the things he had got.
-There was a fifty-pound sack of corn meal, and a side of bacon,
-ammunition, and a four-gallon jug of whisky, and an old book and two
-newspapers for wadding, besides some tow. I toted up a load, and went
-back and set down on the bow of the skiff to rest. I thought it all
-over, and I reckoned I would walk off with the gun and some lines, and
-take to the woods when I run away. I guessed I wouldn't stay in one
-place, but just tramp right across the country, mostly night-times,
-and hunt and fish to keep alive, and so get so far away that the old
-man nor the widow couldn't ever find me any more. I judged I would saw
-out and leave that night if pap got drunk enough, and I reckoned he
-would. I got so full of it I didn't notice how long I was staying till
-the old man hollered and asked me whether I was asleep or drownded.
-
-I got the things all up to the cabin, and then it was about dark.
-While I was cooking supper the old man took a swig or two and got sort
-of warmed up, and went to ripping again. He had been drunk over in
-town, and laid in the gutter all night, and he was a sight to look at.
-A body would 'a' thought he was Adam--he was just all mud. Whenever
-his liquor begun to work he most always went for the govment. This
-time he says:
-
-"Call this a govment! why, just look at it and see what it's like.
-Here's the law a-standing ready to take a man's son away from him--a
-man's own son, which he has had all the trouble and all the anxiety
-and all the expense of raising. Yes, just as that man has got that son
-raised at last, and ready to go to work and begin to do suthin' for
-_him_ and give him a rest, the law up and goes for him. And they call
-_that_ govment! That ain't all, nuther. The law backs that old Judge
-Thatcher up and helps him to keep me out o' my property. Here's what
-the law does: The law takes a man worth six thousand dollars and
-up'ards, and jams him into an old trap of a cabin like this, and lets
-him go round in clothes that ain't fitten for a hog. They call that
-govment! A man can't get his rights in a govment like this. Sometimes
-I've a mighty notion to just leave the country for good and all. Yes,
-and I _told_ 'em so; I told old Thatcher so to his face. Lots of 'em
-heard me, and can tell what I said. Says I, for two cents I'd leave
-the blamed country and never come a-near it ag'in. Them's the very
-words. I says, look at my hat--if you call it a hat--but the lid
-raises up and the rest of it goes down till it's below my chin, and
-then it ain't rightly a hat at all, but more like my head was shoved
-up through a jint o' stove-pipe. Look at it, says I--such a hat for me
-to wear--one of the wealthiest men in this town if I could git my
-rights.
-
-"Oh, yes, this is a wonderful govment, wonderful. Why, looky here.
-There was a free nigger there from Ohio--a mulatter, most as white as
-a white man. He had the whitest shirt on you ever see, too, and the
-shiniest hat; and there ain't a man in that town that's got as fine
-clothes as what he had; and he had a gold watch and chain, and a
-silver-headed cane--the awfulest old gray-headed nabob in the state.
-And what do you think? They said he was a p'fessor in a college, and
-could talk all kinds of languages, and knowed everything. And that
-ain't the wust. They said he could _vote_ when he was at home. Well,
-that let me out. Thinks I, what is the country a-coming to? It was
-'lection day, and I was just about to go and vote myself if I warn't
-too drunk to get there; but when they told me there was a state in
-this country where they'd let that nigger vote, I drawed out. I says
-I'll never vote ag'in. Them's the very words I said; they all heard
-me; and the country may rot for all me--I'll never vote ag'in as long
-as I live. And to see the cool way of that nigger--why, he wouldn't
-'a' give me the road if I hadn't shoved him out o' the way. I says to
-the people, why ain't this nigger put up at auction and sold?--that's
-what I want to know. And what do you reckon they said? Why, they said
-he couldn't be sold till he'd been in the state six months, and he
-hadn't been there that long yet. There, now--that's a specimen. They
-call that a govment that can't sell a free nigger till he's been in
-the state six months. Here's a govment that calls itself a govment,
-and lets on to be a govment, and thinks it is a govment, and yet's got
-to set stock-still for six whole months before it can take a-hold of a
-prowling, thieving, infernal, white-shirted free nigger, and--"
-
-Pap was a-going on so he never noticed where his old limber legs was
-taking him to, so he went head over heels over the tub of salt pork
-and barked both shins, and the rest of his speech was all the hottest
-kind of language--mostly hove at the nigger and the govment, though he
-give the tub some, too, all along, here and there. He hopped around
-the cabin considerable, first on one leg and then on the other,
-holding first one shin and then the other one, and at last he let out
-with his left foot all of a sudden and fetched the tub a rattling
-kick. But it warn't good judgment, because that was the boot that had
-a couple of his toes leaking out of the front end of it; so now he
-raised a howl that fairly made a body's hair raise, and down he went
-in the dirt, and rolled there, and held his toes; and the cussing he
-done then laid over anything he had ever done previous. He said so his
-own self afterwards. He had heard old Sowberry Hagan in his best days,
-and he said it laid over him, too; but I reckon that was sort of
-piling it on, maybe.
-
-After supper pap took the jug, and said he had enough whisky there for
-two drunks and one delirium tremens. That was always his word. I
-judged he would be blind drunk in about an hour, and then I would
-steal the key, or saw myself out, one or t'other. He drank and drank,
-and tumbled down on his blankets by and by; but luck didn't run my
-way. He didn't go sound asleep, but was uneasy. He groaned and moaned
-and thrashed around this way and that for a long time. At last I got
-so sleepy I couldn't keep my eyes open all I could do, and so before I
-knowed what I was about I was sound asleep, and the candle burning.
-
-I don't know how long I was asleep, but all of a sudden there was an
-awful scream and I was up. There was pap looking wild, and skipping
-around every which way and yelling about snakes. He said they was
-crawling up his legs; and then he would give a jump and scream, and
-say one had bit him on the cheek--but I couldn't see no snakes. He
-started and run round and round the cabin, hollering "Take him off!
-take him off! he's biting me on the neck!" I never see a man look so
-wild in the eyes. Pretty soon he was all fagged out, and fell down
-panting; then he rolled over and over wonderful fast, kicking things
-every which way, and striking and grabbing at the air with his hands,
-and screaming and saying there was devils a-hold of him. He wore out
-by and by, and laid still awhile, moaning. Then he laid stiller, and
-didn't make a sound. I could hear the owls and the wolves away off in
-the woods, and it seemed terrible still. He was laying over by the
-corner. By and by he raised up part way and listened, with his head to
-one side. He says, very low:
-
-"Tramp--tramp--tramp; that's the dead; tramp--tramp--tramp; they're
-coming after me; but I won't go. Oh, they're here! don't touch
-me--don't! hands off--they're cold; let go. Oh, let a poor devil
-alone!"
-
-Then he went down on all fours and crawled off, begging them to let
-him alone, and he rolled himself up in his blanket and wallowed in
-under the old pine table, still a-begging; and then he went to crying.
-I could hear him through the blanket.
-
-By and by he rolled out and jumped up on his feet looking wild, and he
-see me and went for me. He chased me round and round the place with a
-clasp-knife, calling me the Angel of Death, and saying he would kill
-me, and then I couldn't come for him no more. I begged, and told him I
-was only Huck; but he laughed _such_ a screechy laugh, and roared and
-cussed, and kept on chasing me up. Once when I turned short and dodged
-under his arm he made a grab and got me by the jacket between my
-shoulders, and I thought I was gone; but I slid out of the jacket
-quick as lightning, and saved myself. Pretty soon he was all tired
-out, and dropped down with his back against the door, and said he
-would rest a minute and then kill me. He put his knife under him, and
-said he would sleep and get strong, and then he would see who was who.
-
-So he dozed off pretty soon. By and by I got the old split-bottom
-chair and clumb up as easy as I could, not to make any noise, and got
-down the gun. I slipped the ramrod down it to make sure it was loaded,
-and then I laid it across the turnip-barrel, pointing towards pap, and
-set down behind it to wait for him to stir. And how slow and still the
-time did drag along.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER VII
-
-
-"Git up! What you 'bout?"
-
-I opened my eyes and looked around, trying to make out where I was. It
-was after sun-up, and I had been sound asleep. Pap was standing over
-me looking sour--and sick, too. He says:
-
-"What you doin' with this gun?"
-
-I judged he didn't know nothing about what he had been doing, so I
-says:
-
-"Somebody tried to get in, so I was laying for him."
-
-"Why didn't you roust me out?"
-
-"Well, I tried to, but I couldn't; I couldn't budge you."
-
-"Well, all right. Don't stand there palavering all day, but out with
-you and see if there's a fish on the lines for breakfast. I'll be
-along in a minute."
-
-He unlocked the door, and I cleared out up the river-bank. I noticed
-some pieces of limbs and such things floating down, and a sprinkling
-of bark; so I knowed the river had begun to rise. I reckoned I would
-have great times now if I was over at the town. The June rise used to
-be always luck for me; because as soon as that rise begins here comes
-cordwood floating down, and pieces of log rafts--sometimes a dozen
-logs together; so all you have to do is to catch them and sell them to
-the woodyards and the sawmill.
-
-I went along up the bank with one eye out for pap and t'other one out
-for what the rise might fetch along. Well, all at once here comes a
-canoe; just a beauty, too, about thirteen or fourteen foot long,
-riding high like a duck. I shot head-first off of the bank like a
-frog, clothes and all on, and struck out for the canoe. I just
-expected there'd be somebody laying down in it, because people often
-done that to fool folks, and when a chap had pulled a skiff out most
-to it they'd raise up and laugh at him. But it warn't so this time. It
-was a drift-canoe sure enough, and I clumb in and paddled her ashore.
-Thinks I, the old man will be glad when he sees this--she's worth ten
-dollars. But when I got to shore pap wasn't in sight yet, and as I was
-running her into a little creek like a gully, all hung over with vines
-and willows, I struck another idea: I judged I'd hide her good, and
-then, 'stead of taking to the woods when I run off, I'd go down the
-river about fifty mile and camp in one place for good, and not have
-such a rough time tramping on foot.
-
-It was pretty close to the shanty, and I thought I heard the old man
-coming all the time; but I got her hid; and then I out and looked
-around a bunch of willows, and there was the old man down the path a
-piece just drawing a bead on a bird with his gun. So he hadn't seen
-anything.
-
-When he got along I was hard at it taking up a "trot" line. He abused
-me a little for being so slow; but I told him I fell in the river, and
-that was what made me so long. I knowed he would see I was wet, and
-then he would be asking questions. We got five catfish off the lines
-and went home.
-
-While we laid off after breakfast to sleep up, both of us being about
-wore out, I got to thinking that if I could fix up some way to keep
-pap and the widow from trying to follow me, it would be a certainer
-thing than trusting to luck to get far enough off before they missed
-me; you see, all kinds of things might happen. Well, I didn't see no
-way for a while, but by and by pap raised up a minute to drink another
-barrel of water, and he says:
-
-"Another time a man comes a-prowling round here you roust me out, you
-hear? That man warn't here for no good. I'd a shot him. Next time you
-roust me out, you hear?"
-
-Then he dropped down and went to sleep again; what he had been saying
-give me the very idea I wanted. I says to myself, I can fix it now so
-nobody won't think of following me.
-
-About twelve o'clock we turned out and went along up the bank. The
-river was coming up pretty fast, and lots of driftwood going by on the
-rise. By and by along comes part of a log raft--nine logs fast
-together. We went out with the skiff and towed it ashore. Then we had
-dinner. Anybody but pap would 'a' waited and seen the day through, so
-as to catch more stuff; but that warn't pap's style. Nine logs was
-enough for one time; he must shove right over to town and sell. So he
-locked me in and took the skiff, and started off towing the raft about
-half past three. I judged he wouldn't come back that night. I waited
-till I reckoned he had got a good start; then I out with my saw, and
-went to work on that log again. Before he was t'other side of the
-river I was out of the hole; him and his raft was just a speck on the
-water away off yonder.
-
-[Illustration: HUCKLEBERRY FINN]
-
-I took the sack of corn meal and took it to where the canoe was hid,
-and shoved the vines and branches apart and put it in; then I done the
-same with the side of bacon; then the whisky-jug. I took all the
-coffee and sugar there was, and all the ammunition; I took the
-wadding; I took the bucket and gourd; took a dipper and a tin cup, and
-my old saw and two blankets, and the skillet and the coffee-pot. I
-took fish-lines and matches and other things--everything that was
-worth a cent. I cleaned out the place. I wanted an ax, but there
-wasn't any, only the one out at the woodpile, and I knowed why I was
-going to leave that. I fetched out the gun, and now I was done.
-
-I had wore the ground a good deal crawling out of the hole and
-dragging out so many things. So I fixed that as good as I could from
-the outside by scattering dust on the place, which covered up the
-smoothness and the sawdust. Then I fixed the piece of log back into
-its place, and put two rocks under it and one against it to hold it
-there, for it was bent up at that place and didn't quite touch ground.
-If you stood four or five foot away and didn't know it was sawed, you
-wouldn't never notice it; and besides, this was the back of the cabin,
-and it warn't likely anybody would go fooling around there.
-
-It was all grass clear to the canoe, so I hadn't left a track. I
-followed around to see. I stood on the bank and looked out over the
-river. All safe. So I took the gun and went up a piece into the woods,
-and was hunting around for some birds when I see a wild pig; hogs soon
-went wild in them bottoms after they had got away from the
-prairie-farms. I shot this fellow and took him into camp.
-
-I took the ax and smashed in the door. I beat it and hacked it
-considerable a-doing it. I fetched the pig in, and took him back
-nearly to the table and hacked into his throat with the ax, and laid
-him down on the ground to bleed; I say ground because it was
-ground--hard packed, and no boards. Well, next I took an old sack and
-put a lot of big rocks in it--all I could drag--and I started it from
-the pig, and dragged it to the door and through the woods down to the
-river and dumped it in, and down it sunk, out of sight. You could easy
-see that something had been dragged over the ground. I did wish Tom
-Sawyer was there; I knowed he would take an interest in this kind of
-business, and throw in the fancy touches. Nobody could spread himself
-like Tom Sawyer in such a thing as that.
-
-Well, last I pulled out some of my hair, and blooded the ax good, and
-stuck it on the back side, and slung the ax in the corner. Then I took
-up the pig and held him to my breast with my jacket (so he couldn't
-drip) till I got a good piece below the house and then dumped him into
-the river. Now I thought of something else. So I went and got the bag
-of meal and my old saw out of the canoe, and fetched them to the
-house. I took the bag to where it used to stand, and ripped a hole in
-the bottom of it with the saw, for there warn't no knives and forks on
-the place--pap done everything with his clasp-knife about the cooking.
-Then I carried the sack about a hundred yards across the grass and
-through the willows east of the house, to a shallow lake that was five
-mile wide and full of rushes--and ducks too, you might say, in the
-season. There was a slough or a creek leading out of it on the other
-side that went miles away, I don't know where, but it didn't go to the
-river. The meal sifted out and made a little track all the way to the
-lake. I dropped pap's whetstone there too, so as to look like it had
-been done by accident. Then I tied up the rip in the meal-sack with a
-string, so it wouldn't leak no more, and took it and my saw to the
-canoe again.
-
-It was about dark now; so I dropped the canoe down the river under
-some willows that hung over the bank, and waited for the moon to rise.
-I made fast to a willow; then I took a bite to eat, and by and by laid
-down in the canoe to smoke a pipe and lay out a plan. I says to
-myself, they'll follow the track of that sackful of rocks to the shore
-and then drag the river for me. And they'll follow that meal track to
-the lake and go browsing down the creek that leads out of it to find
-the robbers that killed me and took the things. They won't ever hunt
-the river for anything but my dead carcass. They'll soon get tired of
-that, and won't bother no more about me. All right; I can stop
-anywhere I want to. Jackson's Island is good enough for me; I know
-that island pretty well, and nobody ever comes there. And then I can
-paddle over to town nights, and slink around and pick up things I
-want. Jackson's Island's the place.
-
-I was pretty tired, and the first thing I knowed I was asleep. When I
-woke up I didn't know where I was for a minute. I set up and looked
-around, a little scared. Then I remembered. The river looked miles and
-miles across. The moon was so bright I could 'a' counted the
-drift-logs that went a-slipping along, black and still, hundreds of
-yards out from shore. Everything was dead quiet, and it looked late,
-and _smelt_ late. You know what I mean--I don't know the words to put
-it in.
-
-I took a good gap and a stretch, and was just going to unhitch and
-start when I heard a sound away over the water. I listened. Pretty
-soon I made it out. It was that dull kind of a regular sound that
-comes from oars working in rowlocks when it's a still night. I peeped
-out through the willow branches, and there it was--a skiff, away
-across the water. I couldn't tell how many was in it. It kept
-a-coming, and when it was abreast of me I see there warn't but one man
-in it. Thinks I, maybe it's pap, though I warn't expecting him. He
-dropped below me with the current, and by and by he came a-swinging up
-shore in the easy water, and he went by so close I could 'a' reached
-out the gun and touched him. Well, it _was_ pap, sure enough--and
-sober, too, by the way he laid his oars.
-
-I didn't lose no time. The next minute I was a-spinning down-stream
-soft, but quick, in the shade of the bank. I made two mile and a half,
-and then struck out a quarter of a mile or more toward the middle of
-the river, because pretty soon I would be passing the ferry-landing,
-and people might see me and hail me. I got out amongst the driftwood,
-and then laid down in the bottom of the canoe and let her float. I
-laid there, and had a good rest and a smoke out of my pipe, looking
-away into the sky; not a cloud in it. The sky looks ever so deep when
-you lay down on your back in the moonshine; I never knowed it before.
-And how far a body can hear on the water such nights! I heard people
-talking at the ferry-landing. I heard what they said, too--every word
-of it. One man said it was getting towards the long days and the short
-nights now. T'other one said _this_ warn't one of the short ones, he
-reckoned--and then they laughed, and he said it over again, and they
-laughed again; then they waked up another fellow and told him, and
-laughed, but he didn't laugh; he ripped out something brisk, and said
-let him alone. The first fellow said he 'lowed to tell it to his old
-woman--she would think it was pretty good; but he said that warn't
-nothing to some things he had said in his time. I heard one man say it
-was nearly three o'clock, and he hoped daylight wouldn't wait more
-than about a week longer. After that the talk got further and further
-away, and I couldn't make out the words any more; but I could hear the
-mumble, and now and then a laugh, too, but it seemed a long ways off.
-
-I was away below the ferry now. I rose up, and there was Jackson's
-Island, about two mile and a half down-stream, heavy-timbered and
-standing up out of the middle of the river, big and dark and solid,
-like a steamboat without any lights. There warn't any signs of the bar
-at the head--it was all under water now.
-
-It didn't take me long to get there. I shot past the head at a ripping
-rate, the current was so swift, and then I got into the dead water and
-landed on the side towards the Illinois shore. I run the canoe into a
-deep dent in the bank that I knowed about; I had to part the willow
-branches to get in; and when I made fast nobody could 'a' seen the
-canoe from the outside.
-
-I went up and set down on a log at the head of the island, and looked
-out on the big river and the black driftwood and away over to the
-town, three mile away, where there was three or four lights twinkling.
-A monstrous big lumber-raft was about a mile upstream, coming along
-down, with a lantern in the middle of it. I watched it come creeping
-down, and when it was most abreast of where I stood I heard a man say,
-"Stern oars, there! heave her head to stabboard!" I heard that just as
-plain as if the man was by my side.
-
-There was a little gray in the sky now; so I stepped into the woods,
-and laid down for a nap before breakfast.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER VIII
-
-
-The sun was up so high when I waked that I judged it was after eight
-o'clock. I laid there in the grass and the cool shade thinking about
-things, and feeling rested and ruther comfortable and satisfied. I
-could see the sun out at one or two holes, but mostly it was big trees
-all about, and gloomy in there amongst them. There was freckled places
-on the ground where the light sifted down through the leaves, and the
-freckled places swapped about a little, showing there was a little
-breeze up there. A couple of squirrels set on a limb and jabbered at
-me very friendly.
-
-I was powerful lazy and comfortable--didn't want to get up and cook
-breakfast. Well, I was dozing off again when I thinks I hears a deep
-sound of "boom!" away up the river. I rouses up, and rests on my elbow
-and listens; pretty soon I hears it again. I hopped up, and went and
-looked out at a hole in the leaves, and I see a bunch of smoke laying
-on the water a long ways up--about abreast the ferry. And there was
-the ferryboat full of people floating along down. I knowed what was
-the matter now. "Boom!" I see the white smoke squirt out of the
-ferryboat's side. You see, they was firing cannon over the water,
-trying to make my carcass come to the top.
-
-I was pretty hungry, but it warn't going to do for me to start a fire,
-because they might see the smoke. So I set there and watched the
-cannon-smoke and listened to the boom. The river was a mile wide
-there, and it always looks pretty on a summer morning--so I was having
-a good enough time seeing them hunt for my remainders if I only had a
-bite to eat. Well, then I happened to think how they always put
-quicksilver in loaves of bread and float them off, because they always
-go right to the drownded carcass and stop there. So, says I, I'll keep
-a lookout, and if any of them's floating around after me I'll give
-them a show. I changed to the Illinois edge of the island to see what
-luck I could have, and I warn't disappointed. A big double loaf come
-along, and I most got it with a long stick, but my foot slipped and
-she floated out further. Of course I was where the current set in the
-closest to the shore--I knowed enough for that. But by and by along
-comes another one, and this time I won. I took out the plug and shook
-out the little dab of quicksilver, and set my teeth in. It was
-"baker's bread"--what the quality eat; none of your low-down
-corn-pone.
-
-I got a good place amongst the leaves, and set there on a log,
-munching the bread and watching the ferry-boat, and very well
-satisfied. And then something struck me. I says, now I reckon the
-widow or the parson or somebody prayed that this bread would find me,
-and here it has gone and done it. So there ain't no doubt but there is
-something in that thing--that is, there's something in it when a body
-like the widow or the parson prays, but it don't work for me, and I
-reckon it don't work for only just the right kind.
-
-I lit a pipe and had a good long smoke, and went on watching. The
-ferryboat was floating with the current, and I allowed I'd have a
-chance to see who was aboard when she come along, because she would
-come in close, where the bread did. When she'd got pretty well along
-down towards me, I put out my pipe and went to where I fished out the
-bread, and laid down behind a log on the bank in a little open place.
-Where the log forked I could peep through.
-
-By and by she come along, and she drifted in so close that they could
-'a' run out a plank and walked ashore. Most everybody was on the boat.
-Pap, and Judge Thatcher, and Bessie Thatcher, and Joe Harper, and Tom
-Sawyer, and his old Aunt Polly, and Sid and Mary, and plenty more.
-Everybody was talking about the murder, but the captain broke in and
-says:
-
-"Look sharp, now; the current sets in the closest here, and maybe he's
-washed ashore and got tangled amongst the brush at the water's edge. I
-hope so, anyway."
-
-I didn't hope so. They all crowded up and leaned over the rails,
-nearly in my face, and kept still, watching with all their might. I
-could see them first-rate, but they couldn't see me. Then the captain
-sung out: "Stand away!" and the cannon let off such a blast right
-before me that it made me deef with the noise and pretty near blind
-with the smoke, and I judged I was gone. If they'd 'a' had some
-bullets in, I reckon they'd 'a' got the corpse they was after. Well, I
-see I warn't hurt, thanks to goodness. The boat floated on and went
-out of sight around the shoulder of the island. I could hear the
-booming now and then, further and further off, and by and by, after an
-hour, I didn't hear it no more. The island was three mile long. I
-judged they had got to the foot, and was giving it up. But they didn't
-yet awhile. They turned around the foot of the island and started up
-the channel on the Missouri side, under steam, and booming once in a
-while as they went. I crossed over to that side and watched them. When
-they got abreast the head of the island they quit shooting and dropped
-over to the Missouri shore and went home to the town.
-
-I knowed I was all right now. Nobody else would come a-hunting after
-me. I got my traps out of the canoe and made me a nice camp in the
-thick woods. I made a kind of a tent out of my blankets to put my
-things under so the rain couldn't get at them. I catched a catfish and
-haggled him open with my saw, and towards sundown I started my
-camp-fire and had supper. Then I set out a line to catch some fish for
-breakfast.
-
-When it was dark I set by my camp-fire smoking, and feeling pretty
-well satisfied; but by and by it got sort of lonesome, and so I went
-and set on the bank and listened to the current swashing along, and
-counted the stars and drift-logs and rafts that come down, and then
-went to bed; there ain't no better way to put in time when you are
-lonesome; you can't stay so, you soon get over it.
-
-And so for three days and nights. No difference--just the same thing.
-But the next day I went exploring around down through the island. I
-was boss of it; it all belonged to me, so to say, and I wanted to know
-all about it; but mainly I wanted to put in the time. I found plenty
-strawberries, ripe and prime; and green summer grapes, and green
-razberries; and the green blackberries was just beginning to show.
-They would all come handy by and by, I judged.
-
-Well, I went fooling along in the deep woods till I judged I warn't
-far from the foot of the island. I had my gun along, but I hadn't shot
-nothing; it was for protection; thought I would kill some game nigh
-home. About this time I mighty near stepped on a good-sized snake, and
-it went sliding off through the grass and flowers, and I after it,
-trying to get a shot at it. I clipped along, and all of a sudden I
-bounded right on to the ashes of a camp-fire that was still smoking.
-
-My heart jumped up amongst my lungs. I never waited for to look
-further, but uncocked my gun and went sneaking back on my tiptoes as
-fast as ever I could. Every now and then I stopped a second amongst
-the thick leaves and listened, but my breath come so hard I couldn't
-hear nothing else. I slunk along another piece further, then listened
-again; and so on, and so on. If I see a stump, I took it for a man; if
-I trod on a stick and broke it, it made me feel like a person had cut
-one of my breaths in two and I only got half, and the short half, too.
-
-When I got to camp I warn't feeling very brash, there warn't much sand
-in my craw; but I says, this ain't no time to be fooling around. So I
-got all my traps into my canoe again so as to have them out of sight,
-and I put out the fire and scattered the ashes around to look like an
-old last-year's camp, and then clumb a tree.
-
-I reckon I was up in the tree two hours; but I didn't see nothing, I
-didn't hear nothing--I only _thought_ I heard and seen as much as a
-thousand things. Well, I couldn't stay up there forever; so at last I
-got down, but I kept in the thick woods and on the lookout all the
-time. All I could get to eat was berries and what was left over from
-breakfast.
-
-By the time it was night I was pretty hungry. So when it was good and
-dark I slid out from shore before moonrise and paddled over to the
-Illinois bank--about a quarter of a mile. I went out in the woods and
-cooked a supper, and I had about made up my mind I would stay there
-all night when I hear a _plunkety-plunk_, _plunkety-plunk_, and says
-to myself, horses coming; and next I hear people's voices. I got
-everything into the canoe as quick as I could, and then went creeping
-through the woods to see what I could find out. I hadn't got far when
-I hear a man say:
-
-"We better camp here if we can find a good place; the horses is about
-beat out. Let's look around."
-
-I didn't wait, but shoved out and paddled away easy. I tied up in the
-old place, and reckoned I would sleep in the canoe.
-
-I didn't sleep much. I couldn't, somehow, for thinking. And every time
-I waked up I thought somebody had me by the neck. So the sleep didn't
-do me no good. By and by I says to myself, I can't live this way; I'm
-a-going to find out who it is that's here on the island with me; I'll
-find it out or bust. Well, I felt better right off.
-
-So I took my paddle and slid out from shore just a step or two, and
-then let the canoe drop along down amongst the shadows. The moon was
-shining, and outside of the shadows it made it most as light as day. I
-poked along well on to an hour, everything still as rocks and sound
-asleep. Well, by this time I was most down to the foot of the island.
-A little ripply, cool breeze begun to blow, and that was as good as
-saying the night was about done. I give her a turn with the paddle and
-brung her nose to shore; then I got my gun and slipped out and into
-the edge of the woods. I sat down there on a log, and looked out
-through the leaves. I see the moon go off watch, and the darkness
-begin to blanket the river. But in a little while I see a pale streak
-over the treetops, and knowed the day was coming. So I took my gun and
-slipped off towards where I had run across that camp-fire, stopping
-every minute or two to listen. But I hadn't no luck somehow; I
-couldn't seem to find the place. But by and by, sure enough, I catched
-a glimpse of fire away through the trees. I went for it, cautious and
-slow. By and by I was close enough to have a look, and there laid a
-man on the ground. It most give me the fantods.  He had a blanket
-around his head, and his head was nearly in the fire. I set there
-behind a clump of bushes in about six foot of him, and kept my eyes on
-him steady. It was getting gray daylight now. Pretty soon he gapped
-and stretched himself and hove off the blanket, and it was Miss
-Watson's Jim! I bet I was glad to see him. I says:
-
-"Hello, Jim!" and skipped out.
-
-He bounced up and stared at me wild. Then he drops down on his knees,
-and puts his hands together and says:
-
-"Doan' hurt me--don't! I hain't ever done no harm to a ghos'. I alwuz
-liked dead people, en done all I could for 'em. You go en git in de
-river ag'in, whah you b'longs, en doan' do nuffn to Ole Jim, 'at 'uz
-alwuz yo' fren'."
-
-Well, I warn't long making him understand I warn't dead. I was ever so
-glad to see Jim. I warn't lonesome now. I told him I warn't afraid of
-_him_ telling the people where I was. I talked along, but he only set
-there and looked at me; never said nothing. Then I says:
-
-"It's good daylight. Le's get breakfast. Make up your camp-fire good."
-
-"What's de use er makin' up de camp-fire to cook strawbries en sich
-truck? But you got a gun, hain't you? Den we kin git sumfn better den
-strawbries."
-
-"Strawberries and such truck," I says. "Is that what you live on?"
-
-"I couldn' git nuffn else," he says.
-
-"Why, how long you been on the island, Jim?"
-
-"I come heah de night arter you's killed."
-
-"What, all that time?"
-
-"Yes-indeedy."
-
-"And ain't you had nothing but that kind of rubbage to eat?"
-
-"No, sah--nuffn  else."
-
-"Well, you must be most starved, ain't you?"
-
-"I reck'n I could eat a hoss. I think I could. How long you ben on de
-islan'?"
-
-"Since the night I got killed."
-
-"No! W'y, what has you lived on? But you got a gun. Oh, yes, you got a
-gun. Dat's good. Now you kill sumfn en I'll make up de fire."
-
-So we went over to where the canoe was, and while he built a fire in a
-grassy open place amongst the trees, I fetched meal and bacon and
-coffee, and coffee-pot and frying-pan, and sugar and tin cups, and the
-nigger was set back considerable, because he reckoned it was all done
-with witchcraft. I catched a good big catfish, too, and Jim cleaned
-him with his knife, and fried him.
-
-When breakfast was ready we lolled on the grass and eat it smoking
-hot. Jim laid it in with all his might, for he was most about starved.
-Then when we had got pretty well stuffed, we laid off and lazied.
-
-By and by Jim says:
-
-"But looky here, Huck, who wuz it dat 'uz killed in dat shanty ef it
-warn't you?"
-
-Then I told him the whole thing, and he said it was smart. He said Tom
-Sawyer couldn't get up no better plan than what I had. Then I says:
-
-"How do you come to be here, Jim, and how'd you get here?"
-
-He looked pretty uneasy, and didn't say nothing for a minute. Then he
-says:
-
-"Maybe I better not tell."
-
-"Why, Jim?"
-
-"Well, dey's reasons. But you wouldn' tell on me ef I 'uz to tell you,
-would you, Huck?"
-
-"Blamed if I would, Jim."
-
-"Well, I b'lieve you, Huck. I--I _run off_."
-
-"Jim!"
-
-"But mind, you said you wouldn' tell--you know you said you wouldn'
-tell, Huck."
-
-"Well, I did. I said I wouldn't, and I'll stick to it. Honest _injun_,
-I will. People would call me a low-down Abolitionist and despise me
-for keeping mum--but that don't make no difference. I ain't a-going to
-tell, and I ain't a-going back there, anyways. So, now, le's know all
-about it."
-
-"Well, you see, it 'uz dis way. Ole missus--dat's Miss Watson--she
-pecks on me all de time, en treats me pooty rough, but she awluz said
-she wouldn' sell me down to Orleans. But I noticed dey wuz a nigger
-trader roun' de place considable lately, en I begin to git oneasy.
-Well, one night I creeps to de do' pooty late, en de do' warn't quite
-shet, en I hear old missus tell de widder she gwyne to sell me down to
-Orleans, but she didn' want to, but she could git eight hund'd dollars
-for me, en it 'uz sich a big stack o' money she couldn' resis'. De
-widder she try to git her to say she wouldn't do it, but I never
-waited to hear de res'. I lit out mighty quick, I tell you.
-
-"I tuck out en shin down de hill, en 'spec to steal a skift 'long de
-sho' som'ers 'bove de town, but dey wuz people a-stirring yit, so I
-hid in de ole tumbledown cooper shop on de bank to wait for everybody
-to go 'way. Well, I wuz dah all night. Dey wuz somebody roun' all de
-time. 'Long 'bout six in de mawnin' skifts begin to go by, en 'bout
-eight er nine every skift dat went 'long wuz talkin' 'bout how yo' pap
-come over to de town en say you's killed. Dese las' skifts wuz full o'
-ladies en genlmen a-goin' over for to see de place. Sometimes dey'd
-pull up at de sho' en take a res' b'fo' dey started acrost, so by de
-talk I got to know all 'bout de killin'. I 'uz powerful sorry you's
-killed, Huck, but I ain't no mo' now.
-
-"I laid dah under de shavin's all day. I 'uz hungry, but I warn't
-afeard; bekase I knowed ole missus en de widder wuz goin' to start to
-de camp-meet'n' right arter breakfas' en be gone all day, en dey knows
-I goes off wid de cattle 'bout daylight, so dey wouldn' 'spec to see
-me roun' de place, en so dey wouldn' miss me tell arter dark in de
-evenin'. De yuther servants wouldn' miss me, kase dey'd shin out en
-take holiday soon as de ole folks 'uz out'n de way.
-
-"Well, when it come dark I tuck out up de river road, en went 'bout
-two mile er more to whah dey warn't no houses. I'd made up my mine
-'bout what I's a-gwyne to do. You see, ef I kep' on tryin' to git away
-afoot, de dogs 'ud track me; ef I stole a skift to cross over, dey'd
-miss dat skift, you see, en dey'd know 'bout whah I'd lan' on de
-yuther side, en whah to pick up my track. So I says, a raff is what
-I's arter; it doan' _make_ no track.
-
-"I see a light a-comin' roun' de p'int bymeby, so I wade' in en shove'
-a log ahead o' me en swum more'n half-way acrost de river, en got in
-'mongst de drift-wood, en kep' my head down low, en kinder swum agin
-de current tell de raff come along. Den I swum to de stern uv it en
-tuck a-holt. It clouded up en 'uz pooty dark for a little while. So I
-clumb up en laid down on de planks. De men 'uz all 'way yonder in de
-middle, whah de lantern wuz. De river wuz a-risin', en dey wuz a good
-current; so I reck'n'd 'at by fo' in de mawnin' I'd be twenty-five
-mile down de river, en den I'd slip in jis b'fo' daylight en swim
-asho', en take to de woods on de Illinois side.
-
-"But I didn' have no luck. When we 'uz mos' down to de head er de
-islan' a man begin to come aft wid de lantern. I see it warn't no use
-fer to wait, so I slid overboard en struck out fer de islan'. Well, I
-had a notion I could lan' mos' anywhers, but I couldn't--bank too
-bluff. I uz mos' to de foot er de islan' b'fo' I foun' a good place. I
-went into de woods en jedged I wouldn' fool wid raffs no mo', long as
-dey move de lantern roun' so. I had my pipe en a plug er dog-leg en
-some matches in my cap, en dey warn't wet, so I 'uz all right."
-
-"And so you ain't had no meat nor bread to eat all this time? Why
-didn't you get mud-turkles?"
-
-"How you gwyne to git 'm?  You can't slip up on um en grab um; en
-how's a body gwyne to hit um wid a rock? How could a body do it in de
-night? En I warn't gwyne to show mysef on de bank in de daytime."
-
-"Well, that's so. You've had to keep in the woods all the time, of
-course. Did you hear 'em shooting the cannon?"
-
-"Oh, yes. I knowed dey was arter you. I see um go by heah--watched um
-thoo de bushes."
-
-Some young birds come along, flying a yard or two at a time and
-lighting. Jim said it was a sign it was going to rain. He said it was
-a sign when young chickens flew that way, and so he reckoned it was
-the same way when young birds done it. I was going to catch some of
-them, but Jim wouldn't let me. He said it was death. He said his
-father laid mighty sick once, and some of them catched a bird, and his
-old granny said his father would die, and he did.
-
-And Jim said you mustn't count the things you are going to cook for
-dinner, because that would bring bad luck. The same if you shook the
-tablecloth after sundown. And he said if a man owned a beehive and
-that man died, the bees must be told about it before sun-up next
-morning, or else the bees would all weaken down and quit work and die.
-Jim said bees wouldn't sting idiots; but I didn't believe that,
-because I had tried them lots of times myself, and they wouldn't sting
-me.
-
-I had heard about some of these things before, but not all of them.
-Jim knowed all kinds of signs. He said he knowed most everything. I
-said it looked to me like all the signs was about bad luck, and so I
-asked him if there warn't any good-luck signs. He says:
-
-"Mighty few--an' _dey_ ain't no use to a body. What you want to know
-when good luck's a-comin' for? Want to keep it off?" And he said: "Ef
-you's got hairy arms en a hairy breas', it's a sign dat you's a-gwyne
-to be rich. Well, dey's some use in a sign like dat, 'kase it's so fur
-ahead. You see, maybe you's got to be po' a long time fust, en so you
-might git discourage' en kill yo'sef 'f you didn' know by de sign dat
-you gwyne to be rich bymeby."
-
-"Have you got hairy arms and a hairy breast, Jim?"
-
-"What's de use to ax dat question? Don't you see I has?"
-
-"Well, are you rich?"
-
-"No, but I ben rich wunst, and gwyne to be rich ag'in. Wunst I had
-foteen dollars, but I tuck to specalat'n', en got busted out."
-
-"What did you speculate in, Jim?"
-
-"Well, fust I tackled stock."
-
-"What kind of stock?"
-
-"Why, live stock--cattle, you know. I put ten dollars in a cow. But I
-ain' gwyne to resk no mo' money in stock. De cow up 'n' died on my
-han's."
-
-"So you lost the ten dollars."
-
-"No, I didn't lose it all. I on'y los' 'bout nine of it. I sole de
-hide en taller for a dollar en ten cents."
-
-"You had five dollars and ten cents left. Did you speculate any more?"
-
-"Yes. You know that one-laigged nigger dat b'longs to old Misto
-Bradish? Well, he sot up a bank, en say anybody dat put in a dollar
-would git fo' dollars mo' at de en' er de year. Well, all de niggers
-went in, but dey didn't have much. I wuz de on'y one dat had much. So
-I stuck out for mo' dan fo' dollars, en I said 'f I didn' git it I'd
-start a bank mysef. Well, o' course dat nigger want' to keep me out er
-de business, bekase he says dey warn't business 'nough for two banks,
-so he say I could put in my five dollars en he pay me thirty-five at
-de en' er de year.
-
-"So I done it. Den I reck'n'd I'd inves' de thirty-five dollars right
-off en keep things a-movin'. Dey wuz a nigger name' Bob, dat had
-ketched a wood-flat, en his marster didn' know it; en I bought it
-off'n him en told him to take de thirty-five dollars when de en' er de
-year come; but somebody stole de wood-flat dat night, en nex' day de
-one-laigged nigger say de bank's busted. So dey didn' none uv us git
-no money."
-
-"What did you do with the ten cents, Jim?"
-
-"Well, I 'uz gwyne to spen' it, but I had a dream, en de dream tole me
-to give it to a nigger name' Balum--Balum's Ass dey call him for
-short; he's one er dem chuckleheads, you know. But he's lucky, dey
-say, en I see I warn't lucky. De dream say let Balum inves' de ten
-cents en he'd make a raise for me. Well, Balum he tuck de money, en
-when he wuz in church he hear de preacher say dat whoever give to de
-po' len' to de Lord, en boun' to git his money back a hund'd times. So
-Balum he tuck en give de ten cents to de po', en laid low to see what
-wuz gwyne to come of it."
-
-"Well, what did come of it, Jim?"
-
-"Nuffn never come of it. I couldn' manage to k'leck dat money no way;
-en Balum he couldn'. I ain' gwyne to len' no mo' money 'dout I see de
-security. Boun' to git yo' money back a hund'd times, de preacher
-says! Ef I could git de ten _cents_ back, I'd call it squah, en be
-glad er de chanst."
-
-"Well, it's all right anyway, Jim, long as you're going to be rich
-again some time or other."
-
-"Yes; en I's rich now, come to look at it. I owns mysef, en I's wuth
-eight hund'd dollars. I wisht I had de money, I wouldn' want no mo'."
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER IX
-
-
-I wanted to go and look at a place right about the middle of the
-island that I'd found when I was exploring; so we started and soon got
-to it, because the island was only three miles long and a quarter of a
-mile wide.
-
-This place was a tolerable long, steep hill or ridge about forty foot
-high. We had a rough time getting to the top, the sides was so steep
-and the bushes so thick. We tramped and clumb around all over it, and
-by and by found a good big cavern in the rock, most up to the top on
-the side towards Illinois. The cavern was as big as two or three rooms
-bunched together, and Jim could stand up straight in it. It was cool
-in there. Jim was for putting our traps in there right away, but I
-said we didn't want to be climbing up and down there all the time.
-
-Jim said if we had the canoe hid in a good place, and had all the
-traps in the cavern, we could rush there if anybody was to come to the
-island, and they would never find us without dogs. And, besides, he
-said them little birds had said it was going to rain, and did I want
-the things to get wet?
-
-So we went back and got the canoe, and paddled up abreast the cavern,
-and lugged all the traps up there. Then we hunted up a place close by
-to hide the canoe in, amongst the thick willows. We took some fish off
-of the lines and set them again, and begun to get ready for dinner.
-
-The door of the cavern was big enough to roll a hogshead in, and on
-one side of the door the floor stuck out a little bit, and was flat
-and a good place to build a fire on. So we built it there and cooked
-dinner.
-
-We spread the blankets inside for a carpet, and eat our dinner in
-there. We put all the other things handy at the back of the cavern.
-Pretty soon it darkened up, and begun to thunder and lighten; so the
-birds was right about it. Directly it begun to rain, and it rained
-like all fury, too, and I never see the wind blow so. It was one of
-these regular summer storms. It would get so dark that it looked all
-blue-black outside, and lovely; and the rain would thrash along by so
-thick that the trees off a little ways looked dim and spider-webby;
-and here would come a blast of wind that would bend the trees down and
-turn up the pale underside of the leaves; and then a perfect ripper of
-a gust would follow along and set the branches to tossing their arms
-as if they was just wild; and next, when it was just about the bluest
-and blackest--_fst!_ it was as bright as glory, and you'd have a
-little glimpse of tree-tops a-plunging about away off yonder in the
-storm, hundreds of yards further than you could see before; dark as
-sin again in a second, and now you'd hear the thunder let go with an
-awful crash, and then go rumbling, grumbling, tumbling, down the sky
-towards the under side of the world, like rolling empty barrels
-down-stairs--where it's long stairs and they bounce a good deal, you
-know.
-
-"Jim, this is nice," I says. "I wouldn't want to be nowhere else but
-here. Pass me along another hunk of fish and some hot corn-bread."
-
-"Well, you wouldn't 'a' ben here 'f it hadn't 'a' ben for Jim. You'd
-'a' ben down dah in de woods widout any dinner, en gittin' mos'
-drownded, too; dat you would, honey. Chickens knows when it's gwyne to
-rain, en so do de birds, chile."
-
-The river went on raising and raising for ten or twelve days, till at
-last it was over the banks. The water was three or four foot deep on
-the island in the low places and on the Illinois bottom. On that side
-it was a good many miles wide, but on the Missouri side it was the
-same old distance across--a half a mile--because the Missouri shore
-was just a wall of high bluffs.
-
-Daytimes we paddled all over the island in the canoe. It was mighty
-cool and shady in the deep woods, even if the sun was blazing outside.
-We went winding in and out amongst the trees, and sometimes the vines
-hung so thick we had to back away and go some other way. Well, on
-every old broken-down tree you could see rabbits and snakes and such
-things; and when the island had been overflowed a day or two they got
-so tame, on account of being hungry, that you could paddle right up
-and put your hand on them if you wanted to; but not the snakes and
-turtles--they would slide off in the water. The ridge our cavern was
-in was full of them. We could 'a' had pets enough if we'd wanted them.
-
-One night we catched a little section of a lumber-raft--nice pine
-planks. It was twelve foot wide and about fifteen or sixteen foot
-long, and the top stood above water six or seven inches--a solid,
-level floor. We could see saw-logs go by in the daylight sometimes,
-but we let them go; we didn't show ourselves in daylight.
-
-Another night when we was up at the head of the island, just before
-daylight, here comes a frame-house down, on the west side. She was a
-two-story, and tilted over considerable. We paddled out and got
-aboard--clumb in at an up-stairs window. But it was too dark to see
-yet, so we made the canoe fast and set in her to wait for daylight.
-
-The light begun to come before we got to the foot of the island. Then
-we looked in at the window. We could make out a bed, and a table, and
-two old chairs, and lots of things around about on the floor, and
-there was clothes hanging against the wall. There was something laying
-on the floor in the far corner that looked like a man. So Jim says:
-
-"Hello, you!"
-
-But it didn't budge. So I hollered again, and then Jim says:
-
-"De man ain't asleep--he's dead. You hold still--I'll go en see."
-
-He went, and bent down and looked, and says:
-
-"It's a dead man. Yes, indeedy; naked, too. He's ben shot in de back.
-I reck'n he's ben dead two er three days. Come in, Huck, but doan'
-look at his face--it's too gashly."
-
-I didn't look at him at all. Jim throwed some old rags over him, but
-he needn't done it; I didn't want to see him. There was heaps of old
-greasy cards scattered around over the floor, and old whisky-bottles,
-and a couple of masks made out of black cloth; and all over the walls
-was the ignorantest kind of words and pictures made with charcoal.
-There was two old dirty calico dresses, and a sun-bonnet, and some
-women's underclothes hanging against the wall, and some men's
-clothing, too. We put the lot into the canoe--it might come good.
-There was a boy's old speckled straw hat on the floor; I took that,
-too. And there was a bottle that had had milk in it, and it had a rag
-stopper for a baby to suck. We would 'a' took the bottle, but it was
-broke. There was a seedy old chest, and an old hair trunk with the
-hinges broke. They stood open, but there warn't nothing left in them
-that was any account. The way things was scattered about we reckoned
-the people left in a hurry, and warn't fixed so as to carry off most
-of their stuff.
-
-We got an old tin lantern, and a butcher-knife without any handle, and
-a bran-new Barlow knife worth two bits in any store, and a lot of
-tallow candles, and a tin candlestick, and a gourd, and a tin cup, and
-a ratty old bedquilt off the bed, and a reticule with needles and pins
-and beeswax and buttons and thread and all such truck in it, and a
-hatchet and some nails, and a fish-line as thick as my little finger
-with some monstrous hooks on it, and a roll of buckskin, and a leather
-dog-collar, and a horseshoe, and some vials of medicine that didn't
-have no label on them; and just as we was leaving I found a tolerable
-good currycomb, and Jim he found a ratty old fiddle-bow, and a wooden
-leg. The straps was broke off of it, but, barring that, it was a good
-enough leg, though it was too long for me and not long enough for Jim,
-and we couldn't find the other one, though we hunted all around.
-
-And so, take it all around, we made a good haul. When we was ready to
-shove off we was a quarter of a mile below the island, and it was
-pretty broad day; so I made Jim lay down in the canoe and cover up
-with the quilt, because if he set up people could tell he was a nigger
-a good ways off. I paddled over to the Illinois shore, and drifted
-down most a half a mile doing it. I crept up the dead water under the
-bank, and hadn't no accidents and didn't see nobody. We got home all
-safe.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER X
-
-
-After breakfast I wanted to talk about the dead man and guess out how
-he come to be killed, but Jim didn't want to. He said it would fetch
-bad luck; and besides, he said, he might come and ha'nt us; he said a
-man that warn't buried was more likely to go a-ha'nting around than
-one that was planted and comfortable. That sounded pretty reasonable,
-so I didn't say no more; but I couldn't keep from studying over it and
-wishing I knowed who shot the man, and what they done it for.
-
-We rummaged the clothes we'd got, and found eight dollars in silver
-sewed up in the lining of an old blanket overcoat. Jim said he
-reckoned the people in that house stole the coat, because if they'd
-'a' knowed the money was there they wouldn't 'a' left it. I said I
-reckoned they killed him, too; but Jim didn't want to talk about that.
-I says:
-
-"Now you think it's bad luck; but what did you say when I fetched in
-the snake-skin that I found on the top of the ridge day before
-yesterday? You said it was the worst bad luck in the world to touch a
-snake-skin with my hands. Well, here's your bad luck! We've raked in
-all this truck and eight dollars besides. I wish we could have some
-bad luck like this every day, Jim."
-
-"Never you mind, honey, never you mind. Don't you git too peart. It's
-a-comin'. Mind I tell you, it's a-comin'."
-
-It did come, too. It was a Tuesday that we had that talk. Well, after
-dinner Friday we was laying around in the grass at the upper end of
-the ridge, and got out of tobacco. I went to the cavern to get some,
-and found a rattlesnake in there. I killed him, and curled him up on
-the foot of Jim's blanket, ever so natural, thinking there'd be some
-fun when Jim found him there. Well, by night I forgot all about the
-snake, and when Jim flung himself down on the blanket while I struck a
-light the snake's mate was there, and bit him.
-
-He jumped up yelling, and the first thing the light showed was the
-varmint curled up and ready for another spring. I laid him out in a
-second with a stick, and Jim grabbed pap's whisky-jug and begun to
-pour it down.
-
-He was barefooted, and the snake bit him right on the heel. That all
-comes of my being such a fool as to not remember that wherever you
-leave a dead snake its mate always comes there and curls around it.
-Jim told me to chop off the snake's head and throw it away, and then
-skin the body and roast a piece of it. I done it, and he eat it and
-said it would help cure him. He made me take off the rattles and tie
-them around his wrist, too. He said that that would help. Then I slid
-out quiet and throwed the snakes clear away amongst the bushes; for I
-warn't going to let Jim find out it was all my fault, not if I could
-help it.
-
-Jim sucked and sucked at the jug, and now and then he got out of his
-head and pitched around and yelled; but every time he come to himself
-he went to sucking at the jug again. His foot swelled up pretty big,
-and so did his leg; but by and by the drunk begun to come, and so I
-judged he was all right; but I'd druther been bit with a snake than
-pap's whisky.
-
-Jim was laid up for four days and nights. Then the swelling was all
-gone and he was around again. I made up my mind I wouldn't ever take
-a-holt of a snake-skin again with my hands, now that I see what had
-come of it. Jim said he reckoned I would believe him next time. And he
-said that handling a snake-skin was such awful bad luck that maybe we
-hadn't got to the end of it yet. He said he druther see the new moon
-over his left shoulder as much as a thousand times than take up a
-snake-skin in his hand. Well, I was getting to feel that way myself,
-though I've always reckoned that looking at the new moon over your
-left shoulder is one of the carelessest and foolishest things a body
-can do. Old Hank Bunker done it once, and bragged about it; and in
-less than two years he got drunk and fell off of the shot-tower, and
-spread himself out so that he was just a kind of a layer, as you may
-say; and they slid him edgeways between two barn doors for a coffin,
-and buried him so, so they say, but I didn't see it. Pap told me. But
-anyway it all come of looking at the moon that way, like a fool.
-
-Well, the days went along, and the river went down between its banks
-again; and about the first thing we done was to bait one of the big
-hooks with a skinned rabbit and set it and catch a catfish that was as
-big as a man, being six foot two inches long, and weighed over two
-hundred pounds. We couldn't handle him, of course; he would 'a' flung
-us into Illinois. We just set there and watched him rip and tear
-around till he drownded. We found a brass button in his stomach and a
-round ball, and lots of rubbage. We split the ball open with the
-hatchet, and there was a spool in it. Jim said he'd had it there a
-long time, to coat it over so and make a ball of it. It was as big a
-fish as was ever catched in the Mississippi, I reckon. Jim said he
-hadn't ever seen a bigger one. He would 'a' been worth a good deal
-over at the village. They peddle out such a fish as that by the pound
-in the market-house there; everybody buys some of him; his meat's as
-white as snow and makes a good fry.
-
-Next morning I said it was getting slow and dull, and I wanted to get
-a stirring-up some way. I said I reckoned I would slip over the river
-and find out what was going on. Jim liked that notion; but he said I
-must go in the dark and look sharp. Then he studied it over and said,
-couldn't I put on some of them old things and dress up like a girl?
-That was a good notion, too. So we shortened up one of the calico
-gowns, and I turned up my trouser-legs to my knees and got into it.
-Jim hitched it behind with the hooks, and it was a fair fit. I put on
-the sun-bonnet and tied it under my chin, and then for a body to look
-in and see my face was like looking down a joint of stove-pipe. Jim
-said nobody would know me, even in the daytime, hardly. I practised
-around all day to get the hang of the things, and by and by I could do
-pretty well in them, only Jim said I didn't walk like a girl; and he
-said I must quit pulling up my gown to get at my britches-pocket. I
-took notice, and done better.
-
-I started up the Illinois shore in the canoe just after dark.
-
-I started across to the town from a little below the ferry-landing,
-and the drift of the current fetched me in at the bottom of the town.
-I tied up and started along the bank. There was a light burning in a
-little shanty that hadn't been lived in for a long time, and I
-wondered who had took up quarters there. I slipped up and peeped in at
-the window. There was a woman about forty year old in there knitting
-by a candle that was on a pine table. I didn't know her face; she was
-a stranger, for you couldn't start a face in that town that I didn't
-know. Now this was lucky, because I was weakening; I was getting
-afraid I had come; people might know my voice and find me out. But if
-this woman had been in such a little town two days she could tell me
-all I wanted to know; so I knocked at the door, and made up my mind I
-wouldn't forget I was a girl.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XI
-
-
-"Come in," says the woman, and I did. She says: "Take a cheer."
-
-I done it. She looked me all over with her little shiny eyes, and
-says:
-
-"What might your name be?"
-
-"Sarah Williams."
-
-"Where'bouts do you live? In this neighborhood?"
-
-"No'm. In Hookerville, seven mile below. I've walked all the way and
-I'm all tired out."
-
-"Hungry, too, I reckon. I'll find you something."
-
-"No'm, I ain't hungry. I was so hungry I had to stop two miles below
-here at a farm; so I ain't hungry no more. It's what makes me so late.
-My mother's down sick, and out of money and everything, and I come to
-tell my uncle Abner Moore. He lives at the upper end of the town, she
-says. I hain't ever been here before. Do you know him?"
-
-"No; but I don't know everybody yet. I haven't lived here quite two
-weeks. It's a considerable ways to the upper end of the town. You
-better stay here all night. Take off your bonnet."
-
-"No," I says; "I'll rest awhile, I reckon, and go on. I ain't afeard
-of the dark."
-
-She said she wouldn't let me go by myself, but her husband would be in
-by and by, maybe in a hour and a half, and she'd send him along with
-me. Then she got to talking about her husband, and about her relations
-up the river, and her relations down the river, and about how much
-better off they used to was, and how they didn't know but they'd made
-a mistake coming to our town, instead of letting well alone--and so on
-and so on, till I was afeard I had made a mistake coming to her to
-find out what was going on in the town; but by and by she dropped on
-to pap and the murder, and then I was pretty willing to let her
-clatter right along. She told about me and Tom Sawyer finding the
-twelve thousand dollars (only she got it twenty) and all about pap and
-what a hard lot he was, and what a hard lot I was, and at last she got
-down to where I was murdered. I says:
-
-"Who done it? We've heard considerable about these goings-on down in
-Hookerville, but we don't know who 'twas that killed Huck Finn."
-
-"Well, I reckon there's a right smart chance of people _here_ that 'd
-like to know who killed him. Some think old Finn done it himself."
-
-"No--is that so?"
-
-"Most everybody thought it at first. He'll never know how nigh he come
-to getting lynched. But before night they changed around and judged it
-was done by a runaway nigger named Jim."
-
-"Why _he_--"
-
-I stopped. I reckoned I better keep still. She run on, and never
-noticed I had put in at all:
-
-"The nigger run off the very night Huck Finn was killed. So there's a
-reward out for him--three hundred dollars. And there's a reward out
-for old Finn, too--two hundred dollars. You see, he come to town the
-morning after the murder, and told about it, and was out with 'em on
-the ferryboat hunt, and right away after he up and left. Before night
-they wanted to lynch him, but he was gone, you see. Well, next day
-they found out the nigger was gone; they found out he hadn't ben seen
-sence ten o'clock the night the murder was done. So then they put it
-on him, you see; and while they was full of it, next day, back comes
-old Finn, and went boo-hooing to Judge Thatcher to get money to hunt
-for the nigger all over Illinois with. The judge gave him some, and
-that evening he got drunk, and was around till after midnight with a
-couple of mighty hard-looking strangers, and then went off with them.
-Well, he hain't come back sence, and they ain't looking for him back
-till this thing blows over a little, for people thinks now that he
-killed his boy and fixed things so folks would think robbers done it,
-and then he'd get Huck's money without having to bother a long time
-with a lawsuit. People do say he warn't any too good to do it. Oh,
-he's sly, I reckon. If he don't come back for a year he'll be all
-right. You can't prove anything on him, you know; everything will be
-quieted down then, and he'll walk in Huck's money as easy as nothing."
-
-"Yes, I reckon so, 'm. I don't see nothing in the way of it. Has
-everybody quit thinking the nigger done it?"
-
-"Oh, no, not everybody. A good many thinks he done it. But they'll get
-the nigger pretty soon now, and maybe they can scare it out of him."
-
-"Why, are they after him yet?"
-
-"Well, you're innocent, ain't you! Does three hundred dollars lay
-around every day for people to pick up? Some folks think the nigger
-ain't far from here. I'm one of them--but I hain't talked it around. A
-few days ago I was talking with an old couple that lives next door in
-the log shanty, and they happened to say hardly anybody ever goes to
-that island over yonder that they call Jackson's Island. Don't anybody
-live there? says I. No, nobody, says they. I didn't say any more, but
-I done some thinking. I was pretty near certain I'd seen smoke over
-there, about the head of the island, a day or two before that, so I
-says to myself, like as not that nigger's hiding over there; anyway,
-says I, it's worth the trouble to give the place a hunt. I hain't seen
-any smoke sence, so I reckon maybe he's gone, if it was him; but
-husband's going over to see--him and another man. He was gone up the
-river; but he got back to-day, and I told him as soon as he got here
-two hours ago."
-
-I had got so uneasy I couldn't set still. I had to do something with
-my hands; so I took up a needle off of the table and went to threading
-it. My hands shook, and I was making a bad job of it. When the woman
-stopped talking I looked up, and she was looking at me pretty curious
-and smiling a little. I put down the needle and thread, and let on to
-be interested--and I was, too--and says:
-
-"Three hundred dollars is a power of money. I wish my mother could get
-it. Is your husband going over there to-night?"
-
-"Oh, yes. He went up-town with the man I was telling you of, to get a
-boat and see if they could borrow another gun. They'll go over after
-midnight."
-
-"Couldn't they see better if they was to wait till daytime?"
-
-"Yes. And couldn't the nigger see better, too? After midnight he'll
-likely be asleep, and they can slip around through the woods and hunt
-up his campfire all the better for the dark, if he's got one."
-
-"I didn't think of that."
-
-The woman kept looking at me pretty curious, and I didn't feel a bit
-comfortable. Pretty soon she says:
-
-"What did you say your name was, honey?"
-
-"M--Mary Williams."
-
-Somehow it didn't seem to me that I said it was Mary before, so I
-didn't look up--seemed to me I said it was Sarah; so I felt sort of
-cornered, and was afeard maybe I was looking it, too. I wished the
-woman would say something more; the longer she set still the uneasier
-I was. But now she says:
-
-"Honey, I thought you said it was Sarah when you first come in?"
-
-"Oh, yes'm, I did. Sarah Mary Williams. Sarah's my first name. Some
-calls me Sarah, some calls me Mary."
-
-"Oh, that's the way of it?"
-
-"Yes'm."
-
-I was feeling better then, but I wished I was out of there, anyway. I
-couldn't look up yet.
-
-Well, the woman fell to talking about how hard times was, and how poor
-they had to live, and how the rats was as free as if they owned the
-place, and so forth and so on, and then I got easy again. She was
-right about the rats. You'd see one stick his nose out of a hole in
-the corner every little while. She said she had to have things handy
-to throw at them when she was alone, or they wouldn't give her no
-peace. She showed me a bar of lead twisted up into a knot, and said
-she was a good shot with it generly, but she'd wrenched her arm a day
-or two ago, and didn't know whether she could throw true now. But she
-watched for a chance, and directly banged away at a rat; but she
-missed him wide, and said, "Ouch!" it hurt her arm so. Then she told
-me to try for the next one. I wanted to be getting away before the old
-man got back, but of course I didn't let on. I got the thing, and the
-first rat that showed his nose I let drive, and if he'd 'a' stayed
-where he was he'd 'a' been a tolerable sick rat. She said that was
-first-rate, and she reckoned I would hive the next one. She went and
-got the lump of lead and fetched it back, and brought along a hank of
-yarn which she wanted me to help her with. I held up my two hands and
-she put the hank over them, and went on talking about her and her
-husband's matters. But she broke off to say:
-
-"Keep your eye on the rats. You better have the lead in your lap,
-handy."
-
-So she dropped the lump into my lap just at that moment, and I clapped
-my legs together on it and she went on talking. But only about a
-minute. Then she took off the hank and looked me straight in the face,
-and very pleasant, and says:
-
-"Come, now, what's your real name?"
-
-"Wh-hat, mum?"
-
-"What's your real name? Is it Bill, or Tom, or Bob?--or what is it?"
-
-I reckon I shook like a leaf, and I didn't know hardly what to do. But
-I says:
-
-"Please to don't poke fun at a poor girl like me, mum. If I'm in the
-way here, I'll--"
-
-"No, you won't. Set down and stay where you are. I ain't going to hurt
-you, and I ain't going to tell on you, nuther. You just tell me your
-secret, and trust me. I'll keep it; and, what's more, I'll help you.
-So'll my old man if you want him to. You see, you're a runaway
-'prentice, that's all. It ain't anything. There ain't no harm in it.
-You've been treated bad, and you made up your mind to cut. Bless you,
-child, I wouldn't tell on you. Tell me all about it now, that's a good
-boy."
-
-So I said it wouldn't be no use to try to play it any longer, and I
-would just make a clean breast and tell her everything, but she
-mustn't go back on her promise. Then I told her my father and mother
-was dead, and the law had bound me out to a mean old farmer in the
-country thirty mile back from the river, and he treated me so bad I
-couldn't stand it no longer; he went away to be gone a couple of days,
-and so I took my chance and stole some of his daughter's old clothes
-and cleared out, and I had been three nights coming the thirty miles.
-I traveled nights, and hid daytimes and slept, and the bag of bread
-and meat I carried from home lasted me all the way, and I had
-a-plenty. I said I believed my uncle Abner Moore would take care of
-me, and so that was why I struck out for this town of Goshen.
-
-"Goshen, child? This ain't Goshen. This is St. Petersburg. Goshen's
-ten mile further up the river. Who told you this was Goshen?"
-
-"Why, a man I met at daybreak this morning, just as I was going to
-turn into the woods for my regular sleep. He told me when the roads
-forked I must take the right hand, and five mile would fetch me to
-Goshen."
-
-"He was drunk, I reckon. He told you just exactly wrong."
-
-"Well, he did act like he was drunk, but it ain't no matter now. I got
-to be moving along. I'll fetch Goshen before daylight."
-
-"Hold on a minute. I'll put you up a snack to eat. You might want it."
-
-So she put me up a snack, and says:
-
-"Say, when a cow's laying down, which end of her gets up first? Answer
-up prompt now--don't stop to study over it. Which end gets up first?"
-
-"The hind end, mum."
-
-"Well, then, a horse?"
-
-"The for'rard end, mum."
-
-"Which side of a tree does the moss grow on?"
-
-"North side."
-
-"If fifteen cows is browsing on a hillside, how many of them eats with
-their heads pointed the same direction?"
-
-"The whole fifteen, mum."
-
-"Well, I reckon you _have_ lived in the country. I thought maybe you
-was trying to hocus me again. What's your real name, now?"
-
-"George Peters, mum."
-
-"Well, try to remember it, George. Don't forget and tell me it's
-Elexander before you go, and then get out by saying it's George
-Elexander when I catch you. And don't go about women in that old
-calico. You do a girl tolerable poor, but you might fool men, maybe.
-Bless you, child, when you set out to thread a needle don't hold the
-thread still and fetch the needle up to it; hold the needle still and
-poke the thread at it; that's the way a woman most always does, but a
-man always does t'other way. And when you throw at a rat or anything,
-hitch yourself up a-tiptoe and fetch your hand up over your head as
-awkward as you can, and miss your rat about six or seven foot. Throw
-stiff-armed from the shoulder, like there was a pivot there for it to
-turn on, like a girl; not from the wrist and elbow, with your arm out
-to one side, like a boy. And, mind you, when a girl tries to catch
-anything in her lap she throws her knees apart; she don't clap them
-together, the way you did when you catched the lump of lead. Why, I
-spotted you for a boy when you was threading the needle; and I
-contrived the other things just to make certain. Now trot along to
-your uncle, Sarah Mary Williams George Elexander Peters, and if you
-get into trouble you send word to Mrs. Judith Loftus, which is me, and
-I'll do what I can to get you out of it. Keep the river road all the
-way, and next time you tramp take shoes and socks with you. The river
-road's a rocky one, and your feet 'll be in a condition when you get
-to Goshen, I reckon."
-
-I went up the bank about fifty yards, and then I doubled on my tracks
-and slipped back to where my canoe was, a good piece below the house.
-I jumped in, and was off in a hurry. I went up-stream far enough to
-make the head of the island, and then started across. I took off the
-sun-bonnet, for I didn't want no blinders on then. When I was about
-the middle I heard the clock begin to strike, so I stops and listens;
-the sound come faint over the water but clear--eleven. When I struck
-the head of the island I never waited to blow, though I was most
-winded, but I shoved right into the timber where my old camp used to
-be, and started a good fire there on a high and dry spot.
-
-Then I jumped in the canoe and dug out for our place, a mile and a
-half below, as hard as I could go. I landed, and slopped through the
-timber and up the ridge and into the cavern. There Jim laid, sound
-asleep on the ground. I roused him out and says:
-
-"Git up and hump yourself, Jim! There ain't a minute to lose. They're
-after us!"
-
-Jim never asked no questions, he never said a word; but the way he
-worked for the next half an hour showed about how he was scared. By
-that time everything we had in the world was on our raft, and she was
-ready to be shoved out from the willow cove where she was hid. We put
-out the camp-fire at the cavern the first thing, and didn't show a
-candle outside after that.
-
-I took the canoe out from the shore a little piece, and took a look;
-but if there was a boat around I couldn't see it, for stars and
-shadows ain't good to see by. Then we got out the raft and slipped
-along down in the shade, past the foot of the island dead still--never
-saying a word.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XII
-
-
-It must 'a' been close on to one o'clock when we got below the island
-at last, and the raft did seem to go mighty slow. If a boat was to
-come along we was going to take to the canoe and break for the
-Illinois shore; and it was well a boat didn't come, for we hadn't ever
-thought to put the gun in the canoe, or a fishing-line, or anything to
-eat. We was in ruther too much of a sweat to think of so many things.
-It warn't good judgment to put _everything_ on the raft.
-
-If the men went to the island I just expect they found the camp-fire I
-built, and watched it all night for Jim to come. Anyways, they stayed
-away from us, and if my building the fire never fooled them it warn't
-no fault of mine. I played it as low down on them as I could.
-
-When the first streak of day began to show we tied up to a towhead in
-a big bend on the Illinois side, and hacked off cottonwood branches
-with the hatchet, and covered up the raft with them so she looked like
-there had been a cave-in in the bank there. A towhead is a sand-bar
-that has cottonwoods on it as thick as harrow-teeth.
-
-We had mountains on the Missouri shore and heavy timber on the
-Illinois side, and the channel was down the Missouri shore at that
-place, so we warn't afraid of anybody running across us. We laid there
-all day, and watched the rafts and steamboats spin down the Missouri
-shore, and up-bound steamboats fight the big river in the middle. I
-told Jim all about the time I had jabbering with that woman; and Jim
-said she was a smart one, and if she was to start after us herself she
-wouldn't set down and watch a camp-fire--no, sir, she'd fetch a dog.
-Well, then, I said, why couldn't she tell her husband to fetch a dog?
-Jim said he bet she did think of it by the time the men was ready to
-start, and he believed they must 'a' gone up-town to get a dog and so
-they lost all that time, or else we wouldn't be here on a towhead
-sixteen or seventeen mile below the village--no, indeedy, we would be
-in that same old town again. So I said I didn't care what was the
-reason they didn't get us as long as they didn't.
-
-When it was beginning to come on dark we poked our heads out of the
-cottonwood thicket, and looked up and down and across; nothing in
-sight; so Jim took up some of the top planks of the raft and built a
-snug wigwam to get under in blazing weather and rainy, and to keep the
-things dry. Jim made a floor for the wigwam, and raised it a foot or
-more above the level of the raft, so now the blankets and all the
-traps was out of reach of steamboat waves. Right in the middle of the
-wigwam we made a layer of dirt about five or six inches deep with a
-frame around it for to hold it to its place; this was to build a fire
-on in sloppy weather or chilly; the wigwam would keep it from being
-seen. We made an extra steering-oar, too, because one of the others
-might get broke on a snag or something. We fixed up a short forked
-stick to hang the old lantern on, because we must always light the
-lantern whenever we see a steamboat coming down-stream, to keep from
-getting run over; but we wouldn't have to light it for up-stream boats
-unless we see we was in what they call a "crossing"; for the river was
-pretty high yet, very low banks being still a little under water; so
-up-bound boats didn't always run the channel, but hunted easy water.
-
-This second night we run between seven and eight hours, with a current
-that was making over four mile an hour. We catched fish and talked,
-and we took a swim now and then to keep off sleepiness. It was kind of
-solemn, drifting down the big, still river, laying on our backs
-looking up at the stars, and we didn't ever feel like talking loud,
-and it warn't often that we laughed--only a little kind of a low
-chuckle. We had mighty good weather as a general thing, and nothing
-ever happened to us at all--that night, nor the next, nor the next.
-
-Every night we passed towns, some of them away up on black hillsides,
-nothing but just a shiny bed of lights; not a house could you see. The
-fifth night we passed St. Louis, and it was like the whole world lit
-up. In St. Petersburg they used to say there was twenty or thirty
-thousand people in St. Louis, but I never believed it till I see that
-wonderful spread of lights at two o'clock that still night. There
-warn't a sound there; everybody was asleep.
-
-Every night now I used to slip ashore toward ten o'clock at some
-little village, and buy ten or fifteen cents' worth of meal or bacon
-or other stuff to eat; and sometimes I lifted a chicken that warn't
-roosting comfortable, and took him along. Pap always said, take a
-chicken when you get a chance, because if you don't want him yourself
-you can easy find somebody that does, and a good deed ain't ever
-forgot. I never see pap when he didn't want the chicken himself, but
-that is what he used to say, anyway.
-
-Mornings before daylight I slipped into corn-fields and borrowed a
-watermelon, or a mushmelon, or a punkin, or some new corn, or things
-of that kind. Pap always said it warn't no harm to borrow things if
-you was meaning to pay them back some time; but the widow said it
-warn't anything but a soft name for stealing, and no decent body would
-do it. Jim said he reckoned the widow was partly right and pap was
-partly right; so the best way would be for us to pick out two or three
-things from the list and say we wouldn't borrow them any more--then he
-reckoned it wouldn't be no harm to borrow the others. So we talked it
-over all one night, drifting along down the river, trying to make up
-our minds whether to drop the watermelons, or the cantelopes, or the
-mushmelons, or what. But toward daylight we got it all settled
-satisfactory, and concluded to drop crabapples and p'simmons. We
-warn't feeling just right before that, but it was all comfortable now.
-I was glad the way it come out, too, because crabapples ain't ever
-good, and the p'simmons wouldn't be ripe for two or three months yet.
-
-We shot a water-fowl now and then that got up too early in the morning
-or didn't go to bed early enough in the evening. Take it all round, we
-lived pretty high.
-
-The fifth night below St. Louis we had a big storm after midnight,
-with a power of thunder and lightning, and the rain poured down in a
-solid sheet. We stayed in the wigwam and let the raft take care of
-itself. When the lightning glared out we could see a big straight
-river ahead, and high, rocky bluffs on both sides. By and by says I,
-"Hel-_lo_, Jim, looky yonder!" It was a steamboat that had killed
-herself on a rock. We was drifting straight down for her. The
-lightning showed her very distinct. She was leaning over, with part of
-her upper deck above water, and you could see every little chimbly-guy
-clean and clear, and a chair by the big bell, with an old slouch hat
-hanging on the back of it, when the flashes come.
-
-Well, it being away in the night and stormy, and all so
-mysterious-like, I felt just the way any other boy would 'a' felt when
-I seen that wreck laying there so mournful and lonesome in the middle
-of the river. I wanted to get aboard of her and slink around a little,
-and see what there was there. So I says:
-
-"Le's land on her, Jim."
-
-But Jim was dead against it at first. He says:
-
-"I doan' want to go fool'n' 'long er no wrack. We's doin' blame' well,
-en we better let blame' well alone, as de good book says. Like as not
-dey's a watchman on dat wrack."
-
-"Watchman your grandmother," I says; "there ain't nothing to watch but
-the texas and the pilot-house; and do you reckon anybody's going to
-resk his life for a texas and a pilot-house such a night as this, when
-it's likely to break up and wash off down the river any minute?" Jim
-couldn't say nothing to that, so he didn't try. "And besides," I says,
-"we might borrow something worth having out of the captain's
-stateroom. Seegars, I bet you--and cost five cents apiece, solid cash.
-Steamboat captains is always rich, and get sixty dollars a month, and
-_they_ don't care a cent what a thing costs, you know, long as they
-want it. Stick a candle in your pocket; I can't rest, Jim, till we
-give her a rummaging. Do you reckon Tom Sawyer would ever go by this
-thing? Not for pie, he wouldn't. He'd call it an adventure--that's
-what he'd call it; and he'd land on that wreck if it was his last act.
-And wouldn't he throw style into it?--wouldn't he spread himself, nor
-nothing? Why, you'd think it was Christopher C'lumbus discovering
-Kingdom Come. I wish Tom Sawyer _was_ here."
-
-Jim he grumbled a little, but give in. He said we mustn't talk any
-more than we could help, and then talk mighty low. The lightning
-showed us the wreck again just in time, and we fetched the stabboard
-derrick, and made fast there.
-
-The deck was high out here. We went sneaking down the slope of it to
-labboard, in the dark, towards the texas, feeling our way slow with
-our feet, and spreading our hands out to fend off the guys, for it was
-so dark we couldn't see no sign of them. Pretty soon we struck the
-forward end of the skylight, and clumb on to it; and the next step
-fetched us in front of the captain's door, which was open, and by
-Jimminy, away down through the texas-hall we see a light! and all in
-the same second we seem to hear low voices in yonder!
-
-Jim whispered and said he was feeling powerful sick, and told me to
-come along. I says, all right, and was going to start for the raft;
-but just then I heard a voice wail out and say:
-
-"Oh, please don't, boys; I swear I won't ever tell!"
-
-Another voice said, pretty loud:
-
-"It's a lie, Jim Turner. You've acted this way before. You always want
-more'n your share of the truck, and you've always got it, too, because
-you've swore 't if you didn't you'd tell. But this time you've said it
-jest one time too many. You're the meanest, treacherousest hound in
-this country."
-
-By this time Jim was gone for the raft. I was just a-biling with
-curiosity; and I says to myself, Tom Sawyer wouldn't back out now, and
-so I won't either; I'm a-going to see what's going on here. So I
-dropped on my hands and knees in the little passage, and crept aft in
-the dark till there warn't but one stateroom betwixt me and the
-cross-hall of the texas. Then in there I see a man stretched on the
-floor and tied hand and foot, and two men standing over him, and one
-of them had a dim lantern in his hand, and the other one had a pistol.
-This one kept pointing the pistol at the man's head on the floor, and
-saying:
-
-"I'd _like_ to! And I orter, too--a mean skunk!"
-
-The man on the floor would shrivel up and say, "Oh, please don't,
-Bill; I hain't ever goin' to tell."
-
-And every time he said that the man with the lantern would laugh and
-say:
-
-"'Deed you _ain't!_ You never said no truer thing 'n that, you bet
-you." And once he said: "Hear him beg! and yit if we hadn't got the
-best of him and tied him he'd 'a' killed us both. And what _for_? Jist
-for noth'n'. Jist because we stood on our _rights_--that's what for.
-But I lay you ain't a-goin' to threaten nobody any more, Jim Turner.
-Put _up_ that pistol, Bill."
-
-Bill says:
-
-"I don't want to, Jake Packard. I'm for killin' him--and didn't he
-kill old Hatfield jist the same way--and don't he deserve it?"
-
-"But I don't _want_ him killed, and I've got my reasons for it."
-
-"Bless yo' heart for them words, Jake Packard! I'll never forgit you
-long's I live!" says the man on the floor, sort of blubbering.
-
-Packard didn't take no notice of that, but hung up his lantern on a
-nail and started toward where I was, there in the dark, and motioned
-Bill to come. I crawfished as fast as I could about two yards, but the
-boat slanted so that I couldn't make very good time; so to keep from
-getting run over and catched I crawled into a stateroom on the upper
-side. The man came a-pawing along in the dark, and when Packard got to
-my stateroom, he says:
-
-"Here--come in here."
-
-And in he come, and Bill after him. But before they got in I was up in
-the upper berth, cornered, and sorry I come. Then they stood there,
-with their hands on the ledge of the berth, and talked. I couldn't see
-them, but I could tell where they was by the whisky they'd been
-having. I was glad I didn't drink whisky; but it wouldn't made much
-difference anyway, because most of the time they couldn't 'a' treed me
-because I didn't breathe. I was too scared. And, besides, a body
-_couldn't_ breathe and hear such talk. They talked low and earnest.
-Bill wanted to kill Turner. He says:
-
-"He's said he'll tell, and he will. If we was to give both our shares
-to him _now_ it wouldn't make no difference after the row and the way
-we've served him. Shore's you're born, he'll turn state's evidence;
-now you hear _me._ I'm for putting him out of his troubles."
-
-"So'm I," says Packard, very quiet.
-
-"Blame it, I'd sorter begun to think you wasn't. Well, then, that's
-all right. Le's go and do it."
-
-"Hold on a minute; I hain't had my say yit. You listen to me.
-Shooting's good, but there's quieter ways if the things _got_ to be
-done. But what _I_ say is this: it ain't good sense to go court'n'
-around after a halter if you can git at what you're up to in some way
-that's jist as good and at the same time don't bring you into no
-resks. Ain't that so?"
-
-"You bet it is. But how you goin' to manage it this time?"
-
-"Well, my idea is this: we'll rustle around and gather up whatever
-pickin's we've overlooked in the staterooms, and shove for shore and
-hide the truck. Then we'll wait. Now I say it ain't a-goin' to be
-more'n two hours befo' this wrack breaks up and washes off down the
-river. See? He'll be drownded, and won't have nobody to blame for it
-but his own self. I reckon that's a considerable sight better 'n
-killin' of him. I'm unfavorable to killin' a man as long as you can
-git aroun' it; it ain't good sense, it ain't good morals. Ain't I
-right?"
-
-"Yes, I reck'n you are. But s'pose she _don't_ break up and wash off?"
-
-"Well, we can wait the two hours anyway and see, can't we?"
-
-"All right, then; come along."
-
-So they started, and I lit out, all in a cold sweat, and scrambled
-forward. It was dark as pitch there; but I said, in a kind of a coarse
-whisper, "Jim!" and he answered up, right at my elbow, with a sort of
-a moan, and I says:
-
-"Quick, Jim, it ain't no time for fooling around and moaning; there's
-a gang of murderers in yonder, and if we don't hunt up their boat and
-set her drifting down the river so these fellows can't get away from
-the wreck there's one of 'em going to be in a bad fix. But if we find
-their boat we can put _all_ of 'em in a bad fix--for the sheriff 'll
-get 'em. Quick--hurry! I'll hunt the labboard side, you hunt the
-stabboard. You start at the raft, and--"
-
-"Oh, my lordy, lordy! _Raf'?_ Dey ain' no raf' no mo'; she done broke
-loose en gone!--en here we is!"
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XIII
-
-
-Well, I catched my breath and most fainted. Shut up on a wreck with
-such a gang as that! But it warn't no time to be sentimentering. We'd
-_got_ to find that boat now--had to have it for ourselves. So we went
-a-quaking and shaking down the stabboard side, and slow work it was,
-too--seemed a week before we got to the stern. No sign of a boat. Jim
-said he didn't believe he could go any farther--so scared he hadn't
-hardly any strength left, he said. But I said, come on, if we get left
-on this wreck we are in a fix, sure. So on we prowled again. We struck
-for the stern of the texas, and found it, and then scrabbled along
-forwards on the skylight, hanging on from shutter to shutter, for the
-edge of the skylight was in the water. When we got pretty close to the
-cross-hall door there was the skiff, sure enough! I could just barely
-see her. I felt ever so thankful. In another second I would 'a' been
-aboard of her, but just then the door opened. One of the men stuck his
-head out only about a couple of foot from me, and I thought I was
-gone; but he jerked it in again, and says:
-
-"Heave that blame lantern out o' sight, Bill!" He flung a bag of
-something into the boat, and then got in himself and set down. It was
-Packard. Then Bill _he_ come out and got in. Packard says, in a low
-voice:
-
-"All ready--shove off!"
-
-I couldn't hardly hang on to the shutters, I was so weak. But Bill
-says:
-
-"Hold on--'d you go through him?"
-
-"No. Didn't you?"
-
-"No. So he's got his share o' the cash yet."
-
-"Well, then, come along; no use to take truck and leave money."
-
-"Say, won't he suspicion what we're up to?"
-
-"Maybe he won't. But we got to have it anyway. Come along."
-
-So they got out and went in.
-
-The door slammed to because it was on the careened side; and in a half
-second I was in the boat, and Jim come tumbling after me. I out with
-my knife and cut the rope, and away we went!
-
-We didn't touch an oar, and we didn't speak nor whisper, nor hardly
-even breathe. We went gliding swift along, dead silent, past the tip
-of the paddle-box, and past the stern; then in a second or two more we
-was a hundred yards below the wreck, and the darkness soaked her up,
-every last sign of her, and we was safe, and knowed it.
-
-When we was three or four hundred yards down-stream we see the lantern
-show like a little spark at the texas door for a second, and we knowed
-by that that the rascals had missed their boat, and was beginning to
-understand that they was in just as much trouble now as Jim Turner
-was.
-
-Then Jim manned the oars, and we took out after our raft. Now was the
-first time that I begun to worry about the men--I reckon I hadn't had
-time to before. I begun to think how dreadful it was, even for
-murderers, to be in such a fix. I says to myself, there ain't no
-telling but I might come to be a murderer myself yet, and then how
-would I like it?  So says I to Jim:
-
-"The first light we see we'll land a hundred yards below it or above
-it, in a place where it's a good hiding-place for you and the skiff,
-and then I'll go and fix up some kind of a yarn, and get somebody to
-go for that gang and get them out of their scrape, so they can be hung
-when their time comes."
-
-But that idea was a failure; for pretty soon it begun to storm again,
-and this time worse than ever. The rain poured down, and never a light
-showed; everybody in bed, I reckon. We boomed along down the river,
-watching for lights and watching for our raft. After a long time the
-rain let up, but the clouds stayed, and the lightning kept whimpering,
-and by and by a flash showed us a black thing ahead, floating, and we
-made for it.
-
-It was the raft, and mighty glad was we to get aboard of it again. We
-seen a light now away down to the right, on shore. So I said I would
-go for it. The skiff was half full of plunder which that gang had
-stole there on the wreck. We hustled it on to the raft in a pile, and
-I told Jim to float along down, and show a light when he judged he had
-gone about two mile, and keep it burning till I come; then I manned my
-oars and shoved for the light. As I got down towards it three or  four
-more showed--up on a hillside. It was a village. I closed in above the
-shore light, and laid on my oars and floated. As I went by I see it
-was a lantern hanging on the jackstaff of a double-hull ferryboat. I
-skimmed around for the watchman, a-wondering whereabouts he slept; and
-by and by I found him roosting on the bitts forward, with his head
-down between his knees. I gave his shoulder two or three little
-shoves, and begun to cry.
-
-He stirred up in a kind of a startlish way; but when he see it was
-only me he took a good gap and stretch, and then he says:
-
-"Hello, what's up? Don't cry, bub. What's the trouble?"
-
-I says:
-
-"Pap, and mam, and sis, and--"
-
-Then I broke down. He says:
-
-"Oh, dang it now, _don't_ take on so; we all has to have our troubles,
-and this 'n 'll come out all right. What's the matter with 'em?"
-
-"They're--they're--are you the watchman of the boat?"
-
-"Yes," he says, kind of pretty-well-satisfied like. "I'm the captain
-and the owner and the mate and the pilot and watchman and head
-deck-hand; and sometimes I'm the freight and passengers. I ain't as
-rich as old Jim Hornback, and I can't be so blame' generous and good
-to Tom, Dick, and Harry as what he is, and slam around money the way
-he does; but I've told him a many a time 't I wouldn't trade places
-with him; for, says I, a sailor's life's the life for me, and I'm
-derned if _I'd_ live two mile out o' town, where there ain't nothing
-ever goin' on, not for all his spondulicks and as much more on top of
-it. Says I--"
-
-I broke in and says:
-
-"They're in an awful peck of trouble, and--"
-
-"_Who_ is?"
-
-"Why, pap and mam and sis and Miss Hooker; and if you'd take your
-ferryboat and go up there--"
-
-"Up where? Where are they?"
-
-"On the wreck."
-
-"What wreck?"
-
-"Why, there ain't but one."
-
-"What, you don't mean the _Walter Scott?"_
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Good land! what are they doin' _there_, for gracious sakes?"
-
-"Well, they didn't go there a-purpose."
-
-"I bet they didn't! Why, great goodness, there ain't no chance for 'em
-if they don't git off mighty quick! Why, how in the nation did they
-ever git into such a scrape?"
-
-"Easy enough. Miss Hooker was a-visiting up there to the town--"
-
-"Yes, Booth's Landing--go on."
-
-"She was a-visiting there at Booth's Landing, and just in the edge of
-the evening she started over with her nigger woman in the horse-ferry
-to stay all night at her friend's house, Miss What-you-may-call-her--I
-disremember her name--and they lost their steering-oar, and swung
-around and went a-floating down, stern first, about two mile, and
-saddle-baggsed on the wreck, and the ferryman and the nigger woman and
-the horses was all lost, but Miss Hooker she made a grab and got
-aboard the wreck. Well, about an hour after dark we come along down in
-our trading-scow, and it was so dark we didn't notice the wreck till
-we was right on it; and so _we_ saddle-baggsed; but all of us was
-saved but Bill Whipple--and oh, he _was_ the best cretur!--I most wish
-'t it had been me, I do."
-
-"My George! It's the beatenest thing I ever struck. And _then_ what
-did you all do?"
-
-"Well, we hollered and took on, but it's so wide there we couldn't
-make nobody hear. So pap said somebody got to get ashore and get help
-somehow. I was the only one that could swim, so I made a dash for it,
-and Miss Hooker she said if I didn't strike help sooner, come here and
-hunt up her uncle, and he'd fix the thing. I made the land about a
-mile below, and been fooling along ever since, trying to get people to
-do something, but they said, 'What, in such a night and such a
-current? There ain't no sense in it; go for the steam-ferry.' Now if
-you'll go and--"
-
-"By Jackson, I'd _like_ to, and, blame it, I don't know but I will;
-but who in the dingnation's a-going to _pay_ for it? Do you reckon
-your pap--"
-
-"Why _that's_ all right. Miss Hooker she tole me, _particular_, that
-her uncle Hornback--"
-
-"Great guns! is _he_ her uncle? Looky here, you break for that light
-over yonder-way, and turn out west when you git there, and about a
-quarter of a mile out you'll come to the tavern; tell 'em to dart you
-out to Jim Hornback's, and he'll foot the bill. And don't you fool
-around any, because he'll want to know the news. Tell him I'll have
-his niece all safe before he can get to town. Hump yourself, now; I'm
-a-going up around the corner here to roust out my engineer."
-
-I struck for the light, but as soon as he turned the corner I went
-back and got into my skiff and bailed her out, and then pulled up
-shore in the easy water about six hundred yards, and tucked myself in
-among some wood-boats; for I couldn't rest easy till I could see the
-ferryboat start. But take it all around, I was feeling ruther
-comfortable on accounts of taking all this trouble for that gang, for
-not many would 'a' done it. I wished the widow knowed about it. I
-judged she would be proud of me for helping these rapscallions,
-because rapscallions and dead-beats is the kind the widow and good
-people takes the most interest in.
-
-Well, before long here comes the wreck, dim and dusky, sliding along
-down! A kind of cold shiver went through me, and then I struck out for
-her. She was very deep, and I see in a minute there warn't much chance
-for anybody being alive in her. I pulled all around her and hollered a
-little, but there wasn't any answer; all dead still. I felt a little
-bit heavy-hearted about the gang, but not much, for I reckoned if they
-could stand it I could.
-
-Then here comes the ferryboat; so I shoved for the middle of the river
-on a long down-stream slant; and when I judged I was out of eye-reach
-I laid on my oars, and looked back and see her go and smell around the
-wreck for Miss Hooker's remainders, because the captain would know her
-uncle Hornback would want them; and then pretty soon the ferryboat
-give it up and went for the shore, and I laid into my work and went
-a-booming down the river.
-
-It did seem a powerful long time before Jim's light showed up; and
-when it did show it looked like it was a thousand mile off. By the
-time I got there the sky was beginning to get a little gray in the
-east; so we struck for an island, and hid the raft, and sunk the
-skiff, and turned in and slept like dead people.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XIV
-
-
-By and by, when we got up, we turned over the truck the gang had stole
-off of the wreck, and found boots, and blankets, and clothes, and all
-sorts of other things, and a lot of books, and a spy-glass, and three
-boxes of seegars. We hadn't ever been this rich before in neither of
-our lives. The seegars was prime. We laid off all the afternoon in the
-woods talking, and me reading the books, and having a general good
-time. I told Jim all about what happened inside the wreck and at the
-ferryboat, and I said these kinds of things was adventures; but he
-said he didn't want no more adventures. He said that when I went in
-the texas and he crawled back to get on the raft and found her gone he
-nearly died, because he judged it was all up with _him_ anyway it
-could be fixed; for if he didn't get saved he would get drownded; and
-if he did get saved, whoever saved him would send him back home so as
-to get the reward, and then Miss Watson would sell him South, sure.
-Well, he was right; he was most always right; he had an uncommon level
-head for a nigger. I read considerable to Jim about kings and dukes
-and earls and such, and how gaudy they dressed, and how much style
-they put on, and called each other and so on, 'stead of mister; and
-Jim's eyes bugged out, and he was interested. He says:
-
-"I didn' know dey was so many un um. I hain't hearn 'bout none un um,
-skasely, but ole King Sollermun, onless you counts dem kings dat's in
-a pack er k'yards. How much do a king git?"
-
-"Get?" I says; "why, they get a thousand dollars a month if they want
-it; they can have just as much as they want; everything belongs to
-them."
-
-"_Ain'_ dat gay? En what dey got to do, Huck?"
-
-"_They_ don't do nothing! Why, how you talk! They just set around."
-
-"No; is dat so?"
-
-"Of course it is. They just set around--except, maybe, when there's a
-war; then they go to the war. But other times they just lazy around;
-or go hawking--just hawking and sp--Sh!--d'you hear a noise?"
-
-We skipped out and looked; but it warn't nothing but the flutter of a
-steamboat's wheel away down, coming around the point; so we come back.
-
-"Yes," says I, "and other times, when things is dull, they fuss with
-the parlyment; and if everybody don't go just so he whacks their heads
-off. But mostly they hang round the harem."
-
-"Roun' de which?"
-
-"Harem."
-
-"What's de harem?"
-
-"The place where he keeps his wives. Don't you know about the harem?
-Solomon had one; he had about a million wives."
-
-"Why, yes, dat's so; I--I'd done forgot it. A harem's a bo'd'n-house,
-I reck'n. Mos' likely dey has rackety times in de nussery. En I reck'n
-de wives quarrels considable; en dat 'crease de racket. Yit dey say
-Sollermun de wises' man dat ever live'. I doan' take no stock in dat.
-Bekase why: would a wise man want to live in de mids' er sich a
-blim-blammin' all de time? No--'deed he wouldn't. A wise man 'ud take
-en buil' a biler-factry; en den he could shet _down_ de biler-factry
-when he want to res'."
-
-"Well, but he _was_ the wisest man, anyway; because the widow she told
-me so, her own self."
-
-"I doan' k'yer what de widder say, he _warn't_ no wise man nuther. He
-had some er de dad-fetchedes' ways I ever see. Does you know 'bout dat
-chile dat he 'uz gwyne to chop in two?"
-
-"Yes, the widow told me all about it."
-
-"_Well_, den! Warn' dat de beatenes' notion in de worl'?  You jes'
-take en look at it a minute. Dah's de stump, dah--dat's one er de
-women; heah's you--dat's de yuther one; I's Sollermun; en dish yer
-dollar bill's de chile. Bofe un you claims it. What does I do? Does I
-shin aroun' mongs' de neighbors en fine out which un you de bill _do_
-b'long to, en han' it over to de right one, all safe en soun', de way
-dat anybody dat had any gumption would? No; I take en whack de bill in
-_two_, en give half un it to you, en de yuther half to de yuther
-woman. Dat's de way Sollermun was gwyne to do wid de chile. Now I want
-to ast you: what's de use er dat half a bill?--can't buy noth'n wid
-it. En what use is a half a chile? I wouldn' give a dern for a million
-un um."
-
-"But hang it, Jim, you've clean missed the point--blame it, you've
-missed it a thousand mile."
-
-"Who? Me? Go 'long. Doan' talk to me 'bout yo' pints. I reck'n I knows
-sense when I sees it; en dey ain' no sense in sich doin's as dat. De
-'spute warn't 'bout a half a chile, de 'spute was 'bout a whole chile;
-en de man dat think he kin settle a 'spute 'bout a whole chile wid a
-half a chile doan' know enough to come in out'n de rain. Doan' talk to
-me 'bout Sollermun, Huck, I knows him by de back."
-
-"But I tell you you don't get the point."
-
-"Blame de point! I reck'n I knows what I knows. En mine you, de _real_
-pint furder--it's down deeper. It lays in de way Sollermun was raised.
-You take a man dat's got on'y one or two chillen; is dat man gwyne to
-be waseful o' chillen? No, he ain't; he can't 'ford it. _He_ know how
-to value 'em. But you take a man dat's got 'bout five million chillen
-runnin' roun' de house, en it's diffunt. _He_ as soon chop a chile in
-two as a cat. Dey's plenty mo'. A chile er two, mo' er less, warn't no
-consekens to Sollermun, dad fetch him!"
-
-I never see such a nigger. If he got a notion in his head once, there
-warn't no getting it out again. He was the most down on Solomon of any
-nigger I ever see. So I went to talking about other kings, and let
-Solomon slide. I told about Louis Sixteenth that got his head cut off
-in France long time ago; and about his little boy the dolphin, that
-would 'a' been a king, but they took and shut him up in jail, and some
-say he died there.
-
-"Po' little chap."
-
-"But some says he got out and got away, and come to America."
-
-"Dat's good! But he'll be pooty lonesome--dey ain' no kings here, is
-dey, Huck?"
-
-"No."
-
-"Den he cain't git no situation. What he gwyne to do?"
-
-"Well, I don't know. Some of them gets on the police, and some of them
-learns people how to talk French."
-
-"Why, Huck, doan' de French people talk de same way we does?"
-
-"_No_, Jim; you couldn't understand a word they said--not a single
-word."
-
-"Well, now, I be ding-busted! How do dat come?"
-
-"_I_ don't know; but it's so. I got some of their jabber out of a
-book. S'pose a man was to come to you and say Polly-voo-franzy--what
-would you think?"
-
-"I wouldn' think nuffn; I'd take en bust him over de head--dat is, if
-he warn't white. I wouldn't 'low no nigger to call me dat."
-
-"Shucks, it ain't calling you anything. It's only saying, do you know
-how to talk French?"
-
-"Well, den, why couldn't he _say_ it?"
-
-"Why, he _is_ a-saying it. That's a Frenchman's _way_ of saying it."
-
-"Well, it's a blame ridicklous way, en I doan' want to hear no mo'
-'bout it. Dey ain' no sense in it."
-
-"Looky here, Jim; does a cat talk like we do?"
-
-"No, a cat don't."
-
-"Well, does a cow?"
-
-"No, a cow don't, nuther."
-
-"Does a cat talk like a cow, or a cow talk like a cat?"
-
-"No, dey don't."
-
-"It's natural and right for 'em to talk different from each other,
-ain't it?"
-
-"Course."
-
-"And ain't it natural and right for a cat and a cow to talk different
-from _us_?"
-
-"Why, mos' sholy it is."
-
-"Well, then, why ain't it natural and right for a _Frenchman_ to talk
-different from us? You answer me that."
-
-"Is a cat a man, Huck?"
-
-"No."
-
-"Well, den, dey ain't no sense in a cat talkin' like a man. Is a cow a
-man?--er is a cow a cat?"
-
-"No, she ain't either of them."
-
-"Well, den, she ain't got no business to talk like either one er the
-yuther of 'em. Is a Frenchman a man?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"_Well_, den! Dad blame it, why doan' he _talk_ like a man? You answer
-me _dat!"_
-
-I see it warn't no use wasting words--you can't learn a nigger to
-argue. So I quit.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XV
-
-
-We judged that three nights more would fetch us to Cairo, at the
-bottom of Illinois, where the Ohio River comes in, and that was what
-we was after. We would sell the raft and get on a steamboat and go way
-up the Ohio amongst the free states, and then be out of trouble.
-
-Well, the second night a fog begun to come on, and we made for a
-towhead to tie to, for it wouldn't do to try to run in a fog; but when
-I paddled ahead in the canoe, with the line to make fast, there warn't
-anything but little saplings to tie to. I passed the line around one
-of them right on the edge of the cut bank, but there was a stiff
-current, and the raft come booming down so lively she tore it out by
-the roots and away she went. I see the fog closing down, and it made
-me so sick and scared I couldn't budge for most a half a minute it
-seemed to me--and then there warn't no raft in sight; you couldn't see
-twenty yards. I jumped into the canoe and run back to the stern, and
-grabbed the paddle and set her back a stroke. But she didn't come. I
-was in such a hurry I hadn't untied her. I got up and tried to untie
-her, but I was so excited my hands shook so I couldn't hardly do
-anything with them.
-
-As soon as I got started I took out after the raft, hot and heavy,
-right down the towhead. That was all right as far as it went, but the
-towhead warn't sixty yards long, and the minute I flew by the foot of
-it I shot out into the solid white fog, and hadn't no more idea which
-way I was going than a dead man.
-
-Thinks I, it won't do to paddle; first I know I'll run into the bank
-or a towhead or something; I got to set still and float, and yet it's
-mighty fidgety business to have to hold your hands still at such a
-time. I whooped and listened. Away down there somewheres I hears a
-small whoop, and up comes my spirits. I went tearing after it,
-listening sharp to hear it again. The next time it come I see I warn't
-heading for it, but heading away to the right of it. And the next time
-I was heading away to the left of it--and not gaining on it much
-either, for I was flying around, this way and that and t'other, but it
-was going straight ahead all the time.
-
-I did wish the fool would think to beat a tin pan, and beat it all the
-time, but he never did, and it was the still places between the whoops
-that was making the trouble for me. Well, I fought along, and directly
-I hears the whoop _behind_ me. I was tangled good now. That was
-somebody else's whoop, or else I was turned around.
-
-I throwed the paddle down. I heard the whoop again; it was behind me
-yet, but in a different place; it kept coming, and kept changing its
-place, and I kept answering, till by and by it was in front of me
-again, and I knowed the current had swung the canoe's head
-down-stream, and I was all right if that was Jim and not some other
-raftsman hollering. I couldn't tell nothing about voices in a fog, for
-nothing don't look natural nor sound natural in a fog.
-
-The whooping went on, and in about a minute I come a-booming down on a
-cut bank with smoky ghosts of big trees on it, and the current throwed
-me off to the left and shot by, amongst a lot of snags that fairly
-roared, the current was tearing by them so swift.
-
-In another second or two it was solid white and still again. I set
-perfectly still then, listening to my heart thump, and I reckon I
-didn't draw a breath while it thumped a hundred.
-
-I just give up then. I knowed what the matter was. That cut bank was
-an island, and Jim had gone down t'other side of it. It warn't no
-towhead that you could float by in ten minutes. It had the big timber
-of a regular island; it might be five or six miles long and more than
-half a mile wide.
-
-I kept quiet, with my ears cocked, about fifteen minutes, I reckon. I
-was floating along, of course, four or five miles an hour; but you
-don't ever think of that. No, you _feel_ like you are laying dead
-still on the water; and if a little glimpse of a snag slips by you
-don't think to yourself how fast _you're_ going, but you catch your
-breath and think, my! how that snag's tearing along. If you think it
-ain't dismal and lonesome out in a fog that way by yourself in the
-night, you try it once--you'll see.
-
-Next, for about a half an hour, I whoops now and then; at last I hears
-the answer a long ways off, and tries to follow it, but I couldn't do
-it, and directly I judged I'd got into a nest of towheads, for I had
-little dim glimpses of them on both sides of me--sometimes just a
-narrow channel between, and some that I couldn't see I knowed was
-there because I'd hear the wash of the current against the old dead
-brush and trash that hung over the banks. Well, I warn't long loosing
-the whoops down amongst the towheads; and I only tried to chase them a
-little while, anyway, because it was worse than chasing a
-Jack-o'-lantern. You never knowed a sound dodge around so, and swap
-places so quick and so much.
-
-I had to claw away from the bank pretty lively four or five times, to
-keep from knocking the islands out of the river; and so I judged the
-raft must be butting into the bank every now and then, or else it
-would get further ahead and clear out of hearing--it was floating a
-little faster than what I was.
-
-Well, I seemed to be in the open river again by and by, but I couldn't
-hear no sign of a whoop nowheres. I reckoned Jim had fetched up on a
-snag, maybe, and it was all up with him. I was good and tired, so I
-laid down in the canoe and said I wouldn't bother no more. I didn't
-want to go to sleep, of course; but I was so sleepy I couldn't help
-it; so I thought I would take jest one little cat-nap.
-
-But I reckon it was more than a cat-nap, for when I waked up the stars
-was shining bright, the fog was all gone, and I was spinning down a
-big bend stern first. First I didn't know where I was; I thought I was
-dreaming; and when things began to come back to me they seemed to come
-up dim out of last week.
-
-It was a monstrous big river here, with the tallest and the thickest
-kind of timber on both banks; just a solid wall, as well as I could
-see by the stars. I looked away down-stream, and seen a black speck on
-the water. I took after it; but when I got to it it warn't nothing but
-a couple of saw-logs made fast together. Then I see another speck, and
-chased that; then another, and this time I was right. It was the raft.
-
-When I got to it Jim was setting there with his head down between his
-knees, asleep, with his right arm hanging over the steering-oar. The
-other oar was smashed off, and the raft was littered up with leaves
-and branches and dirt. So she'd had a rough time.
-
-I made fast and laid down under Jim's nose on the raft, and began to
-gap, and stretch my fists out against Jim, and says:
-
-"Hello, Jim, have I been asleep? Why didn't you stir me up?"
-
-"Goodness gracious, is dat you, Huck? En you ain' dead--you ain'
-drownded--you's back ag'in? It's too good for true, honey, it's too
-good for true. Lemme look at you chile, lemme feel o' you. No, you
-ain' dead! you's back ag'in, 'live en soun', jis de same ole Huck--de
-same ole Huck, thanks to goodness!"
-
-"What's the matter with you, Jim? You been a-drinking?"
-
-"Drinkin'? Has I ben a-drinkin'? Has I had a chance to be a-drinkin'?"
-
-"Well, then, what makes you talk so wild?"
-
-"How does I talk wild?"
-
-"_How?_ Why, hain't you been talking about my coming back, and all
-that stuff, as if I'd been gone away?"
-
-"Huck--Huck Finn, you look me in de eye; look me in de eye. _Hain't_
-you ben gone away?"
-
-"Gone away? Why, what in the nation do you mean? _I_ hain't been gone
-anywheres. Where would I go to?"
-
-"Well, looky here, boss, dey's sumfn wrong, dey is. Is I _me_, or who
-_is_ I? Is I heah, or whah _is_ I? Now dat's what I wants to know."
-
-"Well, I think you're here, plain enough, but I think you're a
-tangle-headed old fool, Jim."
-
-"I is, is I? Well, you answer me dis: Didn't you tote out de line in
-de canoe fer to make fas' to de towhead?"
-
-"No, I didn't. What towhead? I hain't seen no towhead."
-
-"You hain't seen no towhead? Looky here, didn't de line pull loose en
-de raf' go a-hummin' down de river, en leave you en de canoe behine in
-de fog?"
-
-"What fog?"
-
-"Why, _de_ fog!--de fog dat's been aroun' all night. En didn't you
-whoop, en didn't I whoop, tell we got mix' up in de islands en one un
-us got los' en t'other one was jis' as good as los', 'kase he didn'
-know whah he wuz? En didn't I bust up agin a lot er dem islands en
-have a turrible time en mos' git drownded?  Now ain' dat so,
-boss--ain't it so? You answer me dat."
-
-"Well, this is too many for me, Jim. I hain't seen no fog, nor no
-islands, nor no troubles, nor nothing. I been setting here talking
-with you all night till you went to sleep about ten minutes ago, and I
-reckon I done the same. You couldn't 'a' got drunk in that time, so of
-course you've been dreaming."
-
-"Dad fetch it, how is I gwyne to dream all dat in ten minutes?"
-
-"Well, hang it all, you did dream it, because there didn't any of it
-happen."
-
-"But, Huck, it's all jis' as plain to me as--"
-
-"It don't make no difference how plain it is; there ain't nothing in
-it. I know, because I've been here all the time."
-
-Jim didn't say nothing for about five minutes, but set there studying
-over it. Then he says:
-
-"Well, den, I reck'n I did dream it, Huck; but dog my cats ef it ain't
-de powerfulest dream I ever see. En I hain't ever had no dream b'fo'
-dat's tired me like dis one."
-
-"Oh, well, that's all right, because a dream does tire a body like
-everything sometimes. But this one was a staving dream; tell me all
-about it, Jim."
-
-So Jim went to work and told me the whole thing right through, just as
-it happened, only he painted it up considerable. Then he said he must
-start in and "'terpret" it, because it was sent for a warning. He said
-the first towhead stood for a man that would try to do us some good,
-but the current was another man that would get us away from him. The
-whoops was warnings that would come to us every now and then, and if
-we didn't try hard to make out to understand them they'd just take us
-into bad luck, 'stead of keeping us out of it. The lot of towheads was
-troubles we was going to get into with quarrelsome people and all
-kinds of mean folks, but if we minded our business and didn't talk
-back and aggravate them, we would pull through and get out of the fog
-and into the big clear river, which was the free states, and wouldn't
-have no more trouble.
-
-It had clouded up pretty dark just after I got on to the raft, but it
-was clearing up again now.
-
-"Oh, well, that's all interpreted well enough as far as it goes, Jim,"
-I says; "but what does _these_ things stand for?"
-
-It was the leaves and rubbish on the raft and the smashed oar. You
-could see them first-rate now.
-
-Jim looked at the trash, and then looked at me, and back at the trash
-again. He had got the dream fixed so strong in his head that he
-couldn't seem to shake it loose and get the facts back into its place
-again right away. But when he did get the thing straightened around he
-looked at me steady without ever smiling, and says:
-
-"What do dey stan' for? I's gwyne to tell you. When I got all wore out
-wid work, en wid de callin' for you, en went to sleep, my heart wuz
-mos' broke bekase you wuz los', en I didn' k'yer no' mo' what become
-er me en de raf'.  En when I wake up en fine you back ag'in, all safe
-en soun', de tears come, en I could 'a' got down on my knees en kiss
-yo' foot, I's so thankful. En all you wuz thinkin' 'bout wuz how you
-could make a fool uv ole Jim wid a lie. Dat truck dah is _trash_; en
-trash is what people is dat puts dirt on de head er dey fren's en
-makes 'em ashamed."
-
-Then he got up slow and walked to the wigwam, and went in there
-without saying anything but that. But that was enough. It made me feel
-so mean I could almost kissed _his_ foot to get him to take it back.
-
-It was fifteen minutes before I could work myself up to go and humble
-myself to a nigger; but I done it, and I warn't ever sorry for it
-afterward, neither. I didn't do him no more mean tricks, and I
-wouldn't done that one if I'd 'a' knowed it would make him feel that
-way.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XVI
-
-
-We slept most all day, and started out at night, a little ways behind
-a monstrous long raft that was as long going by as a procession. She
-had four long sweeps at each end, so we judged she carried as many as
-thirty men, likely. She had five big wigwams aboard, wide apart, and
-an open camp-fire in the middle, and a tall flag-pole at each end.
-There was a power of style about her. It _amounted_ to something being
-a raftsman on such a craft as that.
-
-We went drifting down into a big bend, and the night clouded up and
-got hot. The river was very wide, and was walled with solid timber on
-both sides; you couldn't see a break in it hardly ever, or a light. We
-talked about Cairo, and wondered whether we would know it when we got
-to it. I said likely we wouldn't, because I had heard say there warn't
-but about a dozen houses there, and if they didn't happen to have them
-lit up, how was we going to know we was passing a town? Jim said if
-the two big rivers joined together there, that would show. But I said
-maybe we might think we was passing the foot of an island and coming
-into the same old river again. That disturbed Jim--and me too. So the
-question was, what to do? I said, paddle ashore the first time a light
-showed, and tell them pap was behind, coming along with a
-trading-scow, and was a green hand at the business, and wanted to know
-how far it was to Cairo. Jim thought it was a good idea, so we took a
-smoke on it and waited.
-
-There warn't nothing to do now but to look out sharp for the town, and
-not pass it without seeing it. He said he'd be mighty sure to see it,
-because he'd be a free man the minute he seen it, but if he missed it
-he'd be in a slave country again and no more show for freedom. Every
-little while he jumps up and says:
-
-"Dah she is?"
-
-But it warn't. It was Jack-o'-lanterns, or lightning-bugs; so he set
-down again, and went to watching, same as before. Jim said it made him
-all over trembly and feverish to be so close to freedom. Well, I can
-tell you it made me all over trembly and feverish, too, to hear him,
-because I begun to get it through my head that he _was_ most free--and
-who was to blame for it? Why, _me_. I couldn't get that out of my
-conscience, no how nor no way. It got to troubling me so I couldn't
-rest; I couldn't stay still in one place. It hadn't ever come home to
-me before, what this thing was that I was doing. But now it did; and
-it stayed with me, and scorched me more and more. I tried to make out
-to myself that _I_ warn't to blame, because _I_ didn't run Jim off
-from his rightful owner; but it warn't no use, conscience up and says,
-every time, "But you knowed he was running for his freedom, and you
-could 'a' paddled ashore and told somebody." That was so--I couldn't
-get around that no way. That was where it pinched. Conscience says to
-me, "What had poor Miss Watson done to you that you could see her
-nigger go off right under your eyes and never say one single word?
-What did that poor old woman do to you that you could treat her so
-mean? Why, she tried to learn you your book, she tried to learn you
-your manners, she tried to be good to you every way she knowed how.
-_That's_ what she done."
-
-I got to feeling so mean and so miserable I most wished I was dead. I
-fidgeted up and down the raft, abusing myself to myself, and Jim was
-fidgeting up and down past me. We neither of us could keep still.
-Every time he danced around and says, "Dah's Cairo!" it went through
-me like a shot, and I thought if it _was_ Cairo I reckoned I would die
-of miserableness.
-
-Jim talked out loud all the time while I was talking to myself. He was
-saying how the first thing he would do when he got to a free state he
-would go to saving up money and never spend a single cent, and when he
-got enough he would buy his wife, which was owned on a farm close to
-where Miss Watson lived; and then they would both work to buy the two
-children, and if their master wouldn't sell them, they'd get an
-Ab'litionist to go and steal them.
-
-It most froze me to hear such talk. He wouldn't ever dared to talk
-such talk in his life before. Just see what a difference it made in
-him the minute he judged he was about free. It was according to the
-old saying, "Give a nigger an inch and he'll take an ell." Thinks I,
-this is what comes of my not thinking. Here was this nigger, which I
-had as good as helped to run away, coming right out flat-footed and
-saying he would steal his children--children that belonged to a man I
-didn't even know; a man that hadn't ever done me no harm.
-
-I was sorry to hear Jim say that, it was such a lowering of him. My
-conscience got to stirring me up hotter than ever, until at last I
-says to it, "Let up on me--it ain't too late yet--I'll paddle ashore
-at the first light and tell." I felt easy and happy and light as a
-feather right off. All my troubles was gone. I went to looking out
-sharp for a light, and sort of singing to myself. By and by one
-showed. Jim sings out:
-
-"We's safe, Huck, we's safe! Jump up and crack yo' heels! Dat's de
-good ole Cairo at las', I jis knows it!"
-
-I says:
-
-"I'll take the canoe and go and see, Jim. It mightn't be, you know."
-
-He jumped and got the canoe ready, and put his old coat in the bottom
-for me to set on, and give me the paddle; and as I shoved off, he
-says:
-
-"Pooty soon I'll be a-shout'n' for joy, en I'll say, it's all on
-accounts o' Huck; I's a free man, en I couldn't ever ben free ef it
-hadn' ben for Huck; Huck done it. Jim won't ever forgit you, Huck;
-you's de bes' fren' Jim's ever had; en you's de _only_ fren' ole Jim's
-got now."
-
-I was paddling off, all in a sweat to tell on him; but when he says
-this, it seemed to kind of take the tuck all out of me. I went along
-slow then, and I warn't right down certain whether I was glad I
-started or whether I warn't. When I was fifty yards off, Jim says:
-
-"Dah you goes, de ole true Huck; de on'y white genlman dat ever kep'
-his promise to ole Jim."
-
-Well, I just felt sick.  But I says, I _got_ to do it--I can't get
-_out_ of it. Right then along comes a skiff with two men in it with
-guns, and they stopped and I stopped. One of them says:
-
-"What's that yonder?"
-
-"A piece of a raft," I says.
-
-"Do you belong on it?"
-
-"Yes, sir."
-
-"Any men on it?"
-
-"Only one, sir."
-
-"Well, there's five niggers run off to-night up yonder, above the head
-of the bend. Is your man white or black?"
-
-I didn't answer up prompt. I tried to, but the words wouldn't come. I
-tried for a second or two to brace up and out with it, but I warn't
-man enough--hadn't the spunk of a rabbit. I see I was weakening; so I
-just give up trying, and up and says:
-
-"He's white."
-
-"I reckon we'll go and see for ourselves."
-
-"I wish you would," says I, "because it's pap that's there, and maybe
-you'd help me tow the raft ashore where the light is. He's sick--and
-so is mam and Mary Ann."
-
-"Oh, the devil! we're in a hurry, boy. But I s'pose we've got to.
-Come, buckle to your paddle, and let's get along."
-
-I buckled to my paddle and they laid to their oars. When we had made a
-stroke or two, I says:
-
-"Pap 'll be mighty much obleeged to you, I can tell you. Everybody
-goes away when I want them to help me tow the raft ashore, and I can't
-do it by myself."
-
-"Well, that's infernal mean. Odd, too. Say, boy, what's the matter
-with your father?"
-
-"It's the--a--the--well, it ain't anything much."
-
-They stopped pulling. It warn't but a mighty little ways to the raft
-now. One says:
-
-"Boy, that's a lie. What _is_ the matter with your pap? Answer up
-square now, and it 'll be the better for you."
-
-"I will, sir, I will, honest--but don't leave us, please. It's
-the--the--Gentlemen, if you'll only pull ahead, and let me heave you
-the headline, you won't have to come a-near the raft--please do."
-
-"Set her back, John, set her back!" says one. They backed water. "Keep
-away, boy--keep to looard. Confound it, I just expect the wind has
-blowed it to us. Your pap's got the smallpox, and you know it precious
-well. Why didn't you come out and say so? Do you want to spread it all
-over?"
-
-"Well," says I, a-blubbering, "I've told everybody before, and they
-just went away and left us."
-
-"Poor devil, there's something in that. We are right down sorry for
-you, but we--well, hang it, we don't want the smallpox, you see. Look
-here, I'll tell you what to do. Don't you try to land by yourself, or
-you'll smash everything to pieces. You float along down about twenty
-miles, and you'll come to a town on the left-hand side of the river.
-It will be long after sun-up then, and when you ask for help you tell
-them your folks are all down with chills and fever. Don't be a fool
-again, and let people guess what is the matter. Now we're trying to do
-you a kindness; so you just put twenty miles between us, that's a good
-boy. It wouldn't do any good to land yonder where the light is--it's
-only a wood-yard. Say, I reckon your father's poor, and I'm bound to
-say he's in pretty hard luck. Here, I'll put a twenty-dollar gold
-piece on this board, and you get it when it floats by. I feel mighty
-mean to leave you; but my kingdom! it won't do to fool with small-pox,
-don't you see?"
-
-"Hold on, Parker," says the man, "here's a twenty to put on the board
-for me. Good-by, boy; you do as Mr. Parker told you, and you'll be all
-right."
-
-"That's so, my boy--good-by, good-bye. If you see any runaway niggers
-you get help and nab them, and you can make some money by it."
-
-"Good-by, sir," says I; "I won't let no runaway niggers get by me if I
-can help it."
-
-They went off and I got aboard the raft, feeling bad and low, because
-I knowed very well I had done wrong, and I see it warn't no use for me
-to try to learn to do right; a body that don't get _started_ right
-when he's little ain't got no show--when the pinch comes there ain't
-nothing to back him up and keep him to his work, and so he gets beat.
-Then I thought a minute, and says to myself, hold on; s'pose you'd 'a'
-done right and give Jim up, would you felt better than what you do
-now? No, says I, I'd feel bad--I'd feel just the same way I do now.
-Well, then, says I, what's the use you learning to do right when it's
-troublesome to do right and ain't no trouble to do wrong, and the
-wages is just the same? I was stuck. I couldn't answer that. So I
-reckoned I wouldn't bother no more about it, but after this always do
-whichever come handiest at the time.
-
-I went into the wigwam; Jim warn't there. I looked all around; he
-warn't anywhere. I says:
-
-"Jim!"
-
-"Here I is, Huck. Is dey out o' sight yit? Don't talk loud."
-
-He was in the river under the stern oar, with just his nose out. I
-told him they were out of sight, so he come aboard. He says:
-
-"I was a-listenin' to all de talk, en I slips into de river en was
-gwyne to shove for sho' if dey come aboard. Den I was gwyne to swim to
-de raf' agin when dey was gone. But lawsy, how you did fool 'em, Huck!
-Dat _wuz_ de smartes' dodge! I tell you, chile, I 'spec it save' ole
-Jim--ole Jim ain't going to forgit you for dat, honey."
-
-Then we talked about the money. It was a pretty good raise--twenty
-dollars apiece. Jim said we could take deck passage on a steamboat
-now, and the money would last us as far as we wanted to go in the free
-states. He said twenty mile more warn't far for the raft to go, but he
-wished we was already there.
-
-Towards daybreak we tied up, and Jim was mighty particular about
-hiding the raft good. Then he worked all day fixing things in bundles,
-and getting all ready to quit rafting.
-
-That night about ten we hove in sight of the lights of a town away
-down in a left-hand bend.
-
-I went off in the canoe to ask about it. Pretty soon I found a man out
-in the river with a skiff, setting a trot-line. I ranged up and says:
-
-"Mister, is that town Cairo?"
-
-"Cairo? no. You must be a blame' fool."
-
-"What town is it, mister?"
-
-"If you want to know, go and find out. If you stay here botherin'
-around me for about a half a minute longer you'll get something you
-won't want."
-
-I paddled to the raft. Jim was awful disappointed, but I said never
-mind, Cairo would be the next place, I reckoned.
-
-We passed another town before daylight, and I was going out again; but
-it was high ground, so I didn't go. No high ground about Cairo, Jim
-said. I had forgot it. We laid up for the day on a towhead tolerable
-close to the left-hand bank. I begun to suspicion something. So did
-Jim. I says:
-
-"Maybe we went by Cairo in the fog that night."
-
-He says:
-
-"Doan' le's talk about it, Huck. Po' niggers can't have no luck. I
-awluz 'spected dat rattlesnake-skin warn't done wid its work."
-
-"I wish I'd never seen that snake-skin, Jim--I do wish I'd never laid
-eyes on it."
-
-"It ain't yo' fault, Huck; you didn't know. Don't you blame yo'self
-'bout it."
-
-When it was daylight, here was the clear Ohio water inshore, sure
-enough, and outside was the old regular Muddy! So it was all up with
-Cairo.
-
-We talked it all over. It wouldn't do to take to the shore; we
-couldn't take the raft up the stream, of course. There warn't no way
-but to wait for dark, and start back in the canoe and take the
-chances. So we slept all day amongst the cottonwood thicket, so as to
-be fresh for the work, and when we went back to the raft about dark
-the canoe was gone!
-
-We didn't say a word for a good while. There warn't anything to say.
-We both knowed well enough it was some more work of the
-rattlesnake-skin; so what was the use to talk about it? It would only
-look like we was finding fault, and that would be bound to fetch more
-bad luck--and keep on fetching it, too, till we knowed enough to keep
-still.
-
-By and by we talked about what we better do, and found there warn't no
-way but just to go along down with the raft till we got a chance to
-buy a canoe to go back in. We warn't going to borrow it when there
-warn't anybody around, the way pap would do, for that might set people
-after us.
-
-So we shoved out after dark on the raft.
-
-Anybody that don't believe yet that it's foolishness to handle a
-snake-skin, after all that that snake-skin done for us, will believe
-it now if they read on and see what more it done for us.
-
-The place to buy canoes is off of rafts laying up at shore. But we
-didn't see no rafts laying up; so we went along during three hours and
-more. Well, the night got gray and ruther thick, which is the next
-meanest thing to fog. You can't tell the shape of the river, and you
-can't see no distance. It got to be very late and still, and then
-along comes a steamboat up the river. We lit the lantern, and judged
-she would see it. Up-stream boats didn't generly come close to us;
-they go out and follow the bars and hunt for easy water under the
-reefs; but nights like this they bull right up the channel against the
-whole river.
-
-We could hear her pounding along, but we didn't see her good till she
-was close. She aimed right for us. Often they do that and try to see
-how close they can come without touching; sometimes the wheel bites
-off a sweep, and then the pilot sticks his head out and laughs, and
-thinks he's mighty smart. Well, here she comes, and we said she was
-going to try and shave us; but she didn't seem to be sheering off a
-bit. She was a big one, and she was coming in a hurry, too, looking
-like a black cloud with rows of glow-worms around it; but all of a
-sudden she bulged out, big and scary, with a long row of wide-open
-furnace doors shining like red-hot teeth, and her monstrous bows and
-guards hanging right over us. There was a yell at us, and a jingling
-of bells to stop the engines, a powwow of cussing, and whistling of
-steam--and as Jim went overboard on one side and I on the other, she
-come smashing straight through the raft.
-
-I dived--and I aimed to find the bottom, too, for a thirty-foot wheel
-had got to go over me, and I wanted it to have plenty of room. I could
-always stay under water a minute; this time I reckon I stayed under a
-minute and a half. Then I bounced for the top in a hurry, for I was
-nearly busting. I popped out to my armpits and blowed the water out of
-my nose, and puffed a bit. Of course there was a booming current; and
-of course that boat started her engines again ten seconds after she
-stopped them, for they never cared much for raftsmen; so now she was
-churning along up the river, out of sight in the thick weather, though
-I could hear her.
-
-I sung out for Jim about a dozen times, but I didn't get any answer;
-so I grabbed a plank that touched me while I was "treading water," and
-struck out for shore, shoving it ahead of me. But I made out to see
-that the drift of the current was towards the left-hand shore, which
-meant that I was in a crossing; so I changed off and went that way.
-
-It was one of these long, slanting, two-mile crossings; so I was a
-good long time in getting over. I made a safe landing, and clumb up
-the bank. I couldn't see but a little ways, but I went poking along
-over rough ground for a quarter of a mile or more, and then I run
-across a big old-fashioned double log house before I noticed it. I was
-going to rush by and get away, but a lot of dogs jumped out and went
-to howling and barking at me, and I knowed better than to move another
-peg.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XVII
-
-
-In about a minute somebody spoke out of a window without putting his
-head out, and says:
-
-"Be done, boys! Who's there?"
-
-I says:
-
-"It's me."
-
-"Who's me?"
-
-"George Jackson, sir."
-
-"What do you want?"
-
-"I don't want nothing, sir. I only want to go along by, but the dogs
-won't let me."
-
-"What are you prowling around here this time of night for--hey?"
-
-"I warn't prowling around, sir; I fell overboard off of the
-steamboat."
-
-"Oh, you did, did you? Strike a light there, somebody. What did you
-say your name was?"
-
-"George Jackson, sir. I'm only a boy."
-
-"Look here, if you're telling the truth you needn't be afraid--nobody
-'ll hurt you. But don't try to budge; stand right where you are. Rouse
-out Bob and Tom, some of you, and fetch the guns. George Jackson, is
-there anybody with you?"
-
-"No, sir, nobody."
-
-I heard the people stirring around in the house now, and see a light.
-The man sung out: "Snatch that light away, Betsy, you old fool--ain't
-you got any sense? Put it on the floor behind the front door. Bob, if
-you and Tom are ready, take your places."
-
-"All ready."
-
-"Now, George Jackson, do you know the Shepherdsons?"
-
-"No, sir; I never heard of them."
-
-"Well, that may be so, and it mayn't. Now, all ready. Step forward,
-George Jackson. And mind, don't you hurry--come mighty slow. If
-there's anybody with you, let him keep back--if he shows himself he'll
-be shot. Come along now. Come slow; push the door open yourself--just
-enough to squeeze in, d'you hear?"
-
-I didn't hurry; I couldn't if I'd a-wanted to. I took one slow step at
-a time and there warn't a sound, only I thought I could hear my heart.
-The dogs were as still as the humans, but they followed a little
-behind me. When I got to the three log doorsteps I heard them
-unlocking and unbarring and unbolting. I put my hand on the door and
-pushed it a little and a little more till somebody said, "There,
-that's enough--put your head in." I done it, but I judged they would
-take it off.
-
-The candle was on the floor, and there they all was, looking at me,
-and me at them, for about a quarter of a minute: Three big men with
-guns pointed at me, which made me wince, I tell you; the oldest, gray
-and about sixty, the other two thirty or more--all of them fine and
-handsome--and the sweetest old gray-headed lady, and back of her two
-young women which I couldn't see right well. The old gentleman says:
-
-"There; I reckon it's all right. Come in."
-
-As soon as I was in the old gentleman he locked the door and barred it
-and bolted it, and told the young men to come in with their guns, and
-they all went in a big parlor that had a new rag carpet on the floor,
-and got together in a corner that was out of the range of the front
-windows--there warn't none on the side. They held the candle, and took
-a good look at me, and all said, "Why, _he_ ain't a Shepherdson--no,
-there ain't any Shepherdson about him." Then the old man said he hoped
-I wouldn't mind being searched for arms, because he didn't mean no
-harm by it--it was only to make sure. So he didn't pry into my
-pockets, but only felt outside with his hands, and said it was all
-right. He told me to make myself easy and at home, and tell all about
-myself; but the old lady says:
-
-"Why, bless you, Saul, the poor thing's as wet as he can be; and don't
-you reckon it may be he's hungry?"
-
-"True for you, Rachel--I forgot."
-
-So the old lady says:
-
-"Betsy" (this was a nigger woman), "you fly around and get him
-something to eat as quick as you can, poor thing; and one of you girls
-go and wake up Buck and tell him--oh, here he is himself. Buck, take
-this little stranger and get the wet clothes off from him and dress
-him up in some of yours that's dry."
-
-Buck looked about as old as me--thirteen or fourteen or along there,
-though he was a little bigger than me. He hadn't on anything but a
-shirt, and he was very frowzy-headed. He came in gaping and digging
-one fist into his eyes, and he was dragging a gun along with the other
-one. He says:
-
-"Ain't they no Shepherdsons around?"
-
-They said, no, 'twas a false alarm.
-
-"Well," he says, "if they'd 'a' ben some, I reckon I'd 'a' got one."
-
-They all laughed, and Bob says:
-
-"Why, Buck, they might have scalped us all, you've been so slow in
-coming."
-
-"Well, nobody come after me, and it ain't right. I'm always kept down;
-I don't get no show."
-
-"Never mind, Buck, my boy," says the old man, "you'll have show
-enough, all in good time, don't you fret about that. Go 'long with you
-now, and do as your mother told you."
-
-When we got up-stairs to his room he got me a coarse shirt and a
-roundabout and pants of his, and I put them on. While I was at it he
-asked me what my name was, but before I could tell him he started to
-tell me about a bluejay and a young rabbit he had catched in the woods
-day before yesterday, and he asked me where Moses was when the candle
-went out. I said I didn't know; I hadn't heard about it before, no
-way.
-
-"Well, guess," he says.
-
-"How'm I going to guess," says I, "when I never heard tell of it
-before?"
-
-"But you can guess, can't you?  It's just as easy."
-
-"_Which_ candle?" I says.
-
-"Why, any candle," he says.
-
-"I don't know where he was," says I; "where was he?"
-
-"Why, he was in the _dark_! That's where he was!"
-
-"Well, if you knowed where he was, what did you ask me for?"
-
-"Why, blame it, it's a riddle, don't you see? Say, how long are you
-going to stay here? You got to stay always. We can just have booming
-times--they don't have no school now. Do you own a dog? I've got a
-dog--and he'll go in the river and bring out chips that you throw in.
-Do you like to comb up Sundays, and all that kind of foolishness? You
-bet I don't, but ma she makes me. Confound these ole britches! I
-reckon I'd better put 'em on, but I'd ruther not, it's so warm. Are
-you all ready? All right. Come along, old hoss."
-
-Cold corn-pone, cold corn-beef, butter and buttermilk--that is what
-they had for me down there, and there ain't nothing better that ever
-I've come across yet. Buck and his ma and all of them smoked cob
-pipes, except the nigger woman, which was gone, and the two young
-women. They all smoked and talked, and I eat and talked. The young
-women had quilts around them, and their hair down their backs. They
-all asked me questions, and I told them how pap and me and all the
-family was living on a little farm down at the bottom of Arkansaw, and
-my sister Mary Ann run off and got married and never was heard of no
-more, and Bill went to hunt them and he warn't heard of no more, and
-Tom and Mort died, and then there warn't nobody but just me and pap
-left, and he was just trimmed down to nothing, on account of his
-troubles; so when he died I took what there was left, because the farm
-didn't belong to us, and started up the river, deck passage, and fell
-overboard; and that was how I come to be here. So they said I could
-have a home there as long as I wanted it. Then it was most daylight
-and everybody went to bed, and I went to bed with Buck, and when I
-waked up in the morning, drat it all, I had forgot what my name was.
-So I laid there about an hour trying to think, and when Buck waked up
-I says:
-
-"Can you spell, Buck?"
-
-"Yes," he says.
-
-"I bet you can't spell my name," says I.
-
-"I bet you what you dare I can," says he.
-
-"All right," says I, "go ahead."
-
-"G-e-o-r-g-e J-a-x-o-n--there now," he says.
-
-"Well," says I, "you done it, but I didn't think you could. It ain't
-no slouch of a name to spell--right off without studying."
-
-I set it down, private, because somebody might want _me_ to spell it
-next, and so I wanted to be handy with it and rattle it off like I was
-used to it. It was a mighty nice family, and a mighty nice house, too.
-I hadn't seen no house out in the country before that was so nice and
-had so much style. It didn't have an iron latch on the front door, nor
-a wooden one with a buckskin string, but a brass knob to turn, the
-same as houses in town. There warn't no bed in the parlor, nor a sign
-of a bed; but heaps of parlors in towns has beds in them. There was a
-big fireplace that was bricked on the bottom, and the bricks was kept
-clean and red by pouring water on them and scrubbing them with another
-brick; sometimes they wash them over with red water-paint that they
-call Spanish-brown, same as they do in town. They had big brass
-dog-irons that could hold up a saw-log. There was a clock on the
-middle of the mantelpiece, with a picture of a town painted on the
-bottom half of the glass front, and a round place in the middle of it
-for the sun, and you could see the pendulum swinging behind it. It was
-beautiful to hear that clock tick; and sometimes when one of these
-peddlers had been along and scoured her up and got her in good shape,
-she would start in and strike a hundred and fifty before she got
-tuckered out. They wouldn't took any money for her.
-
-Well, there was a big outlandish parrot on each side of the clock,
-made out of something like chalk, and painted up gaudy. By one of the
-parrots was a cat made of crockery, and a crockery dog by the other;
-and when you pressed down on them they squeaked, but didn't open their
-mouths nor look different nor interested. They squeaked through
-underneath. There was a couple of big wild-turkey-wing fans spread out
-behind those things. On the table in the middle of the room was a kind
-of a lovely crockery basket that had apples and oranges and peaches
-and grapes piled up in it, which was much redder and yellower and
-prettier than real ones is, but they warn't real because you could see
-where pieces had got chipped off and showed the white chalk, or
-whatever it was, underneath.
-
-This table had a cover made out of beautiful oilcloth, with a red and
-blue spread-eagle painted on it, and a painted border all around. It
-come all the way from Philadelphia, they said. There was some books,
-too, piled up perfectly exact, on each corner of the table. One was a
-big family Bible full of pictures. One was Pilgrim's Progress, about a
-man that left his family, it didn't say why. I read considerable in it
-now and then. The statements was interesting, but tough. Another was
-Friendship's Offering, full of beautiful stuff and poetry; but I
-didn't read the poetry. Another was Henry Clay's Speeches, and another
-was Dr. Gunn's Family Medicine, which told you all about what to do if
-a body was sick or dead. There was a hymn-book, and a lot of other
-books. And there was nice split-bottom chairs, and perfectly sound,
-too--not bagged down in the middle and busted, like an old basket.
-
-They had pictures hung on the walls--mainly Washingtons and
-Lafayettes, and battles, and Highland Marys, and one called "Signing
-the Declaration." There was some that they called crayons, which one
-of the daughters which was dead made her own self when she was only
-fifteen years old. They was different from any pictures I ever see
-before--blacker, mostly, than is common. One was a woman in a slim
-black dress, belted small under the armpits, with bulges like a
-cabbage in the middle of the sleeves, and a large black scoop-shovel
-bonnet with a black veil, and white slim ankles crossed about with
-black tape, and very wee black slippers, like a chisel, and she was
-leaning pensive on a tombstone on her right elbow, under a weeping
-willow, and her other hand hanging down her side holding a white
-handkerchief and a reticule, and underneath the picture it said "Shall
-I Never See Thee More Alas." Another one was a young lady with her
-hair all combed up straight to the top of her head, and knotted there
-in front of a comb like a chair-back, and she was crying into a
-handkerchief and had a dead bird laying on its back in her other hand
-with its heels up, and underneath the picture it said "I Shall Never
-Hear Thy Sweet Chirrup More Alas."  There was one where a young lady
-was at a window looking up at the moon, and tears running down her
-cheeks; and she had an open letter in one hand with black sealing-wax
-showing on one edge of it, and she was mashing a locket with a chain
-to it against her mouth, and underneath the picture it said "And Art
-Thou Gone Yes Thou Art Gone Alas." These was all nice pictures, I
-reckon, but I didn't somehow seem to take to them, because if ever I
-was down a little they always give me the fan-tods. Everybody was
-sorry she died, because she had laid out a lot more of these pictures
-to do, and a body could see by what she had done what they had lost.
-But I reckoned that with her disposition she was having a better time
-in the graveyard. She was at work on what they said was her greatest
-picture when she took sick, and every day and every night it was her
-prayer to be allowed to live till she got it done, but she never got
-the chance. It was a picture of a young woman in a long white gown,
-standing on the rail of a bridge all ready to jump off, with her hair
-all down her back, and looking up to the moon, with the tears running
-down her face, and she had two arms folded across her breast, and two
-arms stretched out in front, and two more reaching up toward the
-moon--and the idea was to see which pair would look best, and then
-scratch out all the other arms; but, as I was saying, she died before
-she got her mind made up, and now they kept this picture over the head
-of the bed in her room, and every time her birthday come they hung
-flowers on it. Other times it was hid with a little curtain. The young
-woman in the picture had a kind of a nice sweet face, but there was so
-many arms it made her look too spidery, seemed to me.
-
-This young girl kept a scrap-book when she was alive, and used to
-paste obituaries and accidents and cases of patient suffering in it
-out of the Presbyterian Observer, and write poetry after them out of
-her own head. It was very good poetry. This is what she wrote about a
-boy by the name of Stephen Dowling Bots that fell down a well and was
-drownded:
-
-ODE TO STEPHEN DOWLING BOTS, DEC'D
-
-    And did young Stephen sicken,
-    And did young Stephen die?
-    And did the sad hearts thicken,
-    And did the mourners cry?
-
-    No; such was not the fate of
-    Young Stephen Dowling Bots;
-    Though sad hearts round him thickened,
-    'Twas not from sickness' shots.
-
-    No whooping-cough did rack his frame,
-    Nor measles drear with spots;
-    Not these impaired the sacred name
-    Of Stephen Dowling Bots.
-
-    Despised love struck not with woe
-    That head of curly knots,
-    Nor stomach troubles laid him low,
-    Young Stephen Dowling Bots.
-
-    O no. Then list with tearful eye,
-    Whilst I his fate do tell.
-    His soul did from this cold world fly
-    By falling down a well.
-
-    They got him out and emptied him;
-    Alas it was too late;
-    His spirit was gone for to sport aloft
-    In the realms of the good and great.
-
-If Emmeline Grangerford could make poetry like that before she was
-fourteen, there ain't no telling what she could 'a' done by and by.
-Buck said she could rattle off poetry like nothing. She didn't ever
-have to stop to think. He said she would slap down a line, and if she
-couldn't find anything to rhyme with it would just scratch it out and
-slap down another one, and go ahead. She warn't particular; she could
-write about anything you choose to give her to write about just so it
-was sadful. Every time a man died, or a woman died, or a child died,
-she would be on hand with her "tribute" before he was cold. She called
-them tributes. The neighbors said it was the doctor first, then
-Emmeline, then the undertaker--the undertaker never got in ahead of
-Emmeline but once, and then she hung fire on a rhyme for the dead
-person's name, which was Whistler. She warn't ever the same after
-that; she never complained, but she kinder pined away and did not live
-long. Poor thing, many's the time I made myself go up to the little
-room that used to be hers and get out her poor old scrap-book and read
-in it when her pictures had been aggravating me and I had soured on
-her a little. I liked all that family, dead ones and all, and warn't
-going to let anything come between us. Poor Emmeline made poetry about
-all the dead people when she was alive, and it didn't seem right that
-there warn't nobody to make some about her now she was gone; so I
-tried to sweat out a verse or two myself, but I couldn't seem to make
-it go somehow. They kept Emmeline's room trim and nice, and all the
-things fixed in it just the way she liked to have them when she was
-alive, and nobody ever slept there. The old lady took care of the room
-herself, though there was plenty of niggers, and she sewed there a
-good deal and read her Bible there mostly.
-
-Well, as I was saying about the parlor, there was beautiful curtains
-on the windows: white, with pictures painted on them of castles with
-vines all down the walls, and cattle coming down to drink. There was a
-little old piano, too, that had tin pans in it, I reckon, and nothing
-was ever so lovely as to hear the young ladies sing "The Last Link is
-Broken" and play "The Battle of Prague" on it. The walls of all the
-rooms was plastered, and most had carpets on the floors, and the whole
-house was whitewashed on the outside.
-
-It was a double house, and the big open place betwixt them was roofed
-and floored, and sometimes the table was set there in the middle of
-the day, and it was a cool, comfortable place. Nothing couldn't be
-better. And warn't the cooking good, and just bushels of it too!
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XVIII
-
-
-Col. Grangerford was a gentleman, you see. He was a gentleman all
-over; and so was his family. He was well born, as the saying is, and
-that's worth as much in a man as it is in a horse, so the Widow
-Douglas said, and nobody ever denied that she was of the first
-aristocracy in our town; and pap he always said it, too, though he
-warn't no more quality than a mudcat himself. Col. Grangerford was
-very tall and very slim, and had a darkish-paly complexion, not a sign
-of red in it anywheres; he was clean-shaved every morning all over his
-thin face, and he had the thinnest kind of lips, and the thinnest kind
-of nostrils, and a high nose, and heavy eyebrows, and the blackest
-kind of eyes, sunk so deep back that they seemed like they was looking
-out of caverns at you, as you may say. His forehead was high, and his
-hair was gray and straight and hung to his shoulders. His hands was
-long and thin, and every day of his life he put on a clean shirt and a
-full suit from head to foot made out of linen so white it hurt your
-eyes to look at it; and on Sundays he wore a blue tail-coat with brass
-buttons on it. He carried a mahogany cane with a silver head to it.
-There warn't no frivolishness about him, not a bit, and he warn't ever
-loud. He was as kind as he could be--you could feel that, you know,
-and so you had confidence. Sometimes he smiled, and it was good to
-see; but when he straightened himself up like a liberty-pole, and the
-lightning begun to flicker out from under his eyebrows, you wanted to
-climb a tree first, and find out what the matter was afterwards. He
-didn't ever have to tell anybody to mind their manners--everybody was
-always good-mannered where he was. Everybody loved to have him around,
-too; he was sunshine most always--I mean he made it seem like good
-weather. When he turned into a cloud-bank it was awful dark for half a
-minute, and that was enough; there wouldn't nothing go wrong again for
-a week.
-
-When him and the old lady come down in the morning all the family got
-up out of their chairs and give them good day, and didn't set down
-again till they had set down. Then Tom and Bob went to the sideboard
-where the decanter was, and mixed a glass of bitters and handed it to
-him, and he held it in his hand and waited till Tom's and Bob's was
-mixed, and then they bowed and said, "Our duty to you, sir, and
-madam"; and _they_ bowed the least bit in the world and said thank
-you, and so they drank, all three, and Bob and Tom poured a spoonful
-of water on the sugar and the mite of whisky or apple-brandy in the
-bottom of their tumblers, and give it to me and Buck, and we drank to
-the old people too.
-
-Bob was the oldest and Tom next--tall, beautiful men with very broad
-shoulders and brown faces, and long black hair and black eyes. They
-dressed in white linen from head to foot, like the old gentleman, and
-wore broad Panama hats.
-
-Then there was Miss Charlotte; she was twenty-five, and tall and proud
-and grand, but as good as she could be when she warn't stirred up; but
-when she was she had a look that would make you wilt in your tracks,
-like her father. She was beautiful.
-
-So was her sister, Miss Sophia, but it was a different kind. She was
-gentle and sweet like a dove, and she was only twenty.
-
-Each person had their own nigger to wait on them--Buck too. My nigger
-had a monstrous easy time, because I warn't used to having anybody do
-anything for me, but Buck's was on the jump most of the time.
-
-This was all there was of the family now, but there used to be
-more--three sons; they got killed; and Emmeline that died.
-
-The old gentleman owned a lot of farms and over a hundred niggers.
-Sometimes a stack of people would come there, horseback, from ten or
-fifteen mile around, and stay five or six days, and have such
-junketings round about and on the river, and dances and picnics in the
-woods daytimes, and balls at the house nights. These people was mostly
-kinfolks of the family. The men brought their guns with them. It was a
-handsome lot of quality, I tell you.
-
-There was another clan of aristocracy around there--five or six
-families--mostly of the name of Shepherdson. They was as high-toned
-and well born and rich and grand as the tribe of Grangerfords. The
-Shepherdsons and Grangerfords used the same steamboat-landing, which
-was about two mile above our house; so sometimes when I went up there
-with a lot of our folks I used to see a lot of the Shepherdsons there
-on their fine horses.
-
-One day Buck and me was away out in the woods hunting, and heard a
-horse coming. We was crossing the road. Buck says:
-
-"Quick! Jump for the woods!"
-
-We done it, and then peeped down the woods through the leaves. Pretty
-soon a splendid young man came galloping down the road, setting his
-horse easy and looking like a soldier. He had his gun across his
-pommel. I had seen him before. It was young Harney Shepherdson. I
-heard Buck's gun go off at my ear, and Harney's hat tumbled off from
-his head. He grabbed his gun and rode straight to the place where we
-was hid. But we didn't wait. We started through the woods on a run.
-The woods warn't thick, so I looked over my shoulder to dodge the
-bullet, and twice I seen Harney cover Buck with his gun; and then he
-rode away the way he come--to get his hat, I reckon, but I couldn't
-see. We never stopped running till we got home. The old gentleman's
-eyes blazed a minute--'twas pleasure, mainly, I judged--then his face
-sort of smoothed down, and he says, kind of gentle:
-
-"I don't like that shooting from behind a bush. Why didn't you step
-into the road, my boy?"
-
-"The Shepherdsons don't, father. They always take advantage."
-
-Miss Charlotte she held her head up like a queen while Buck was
-telling his tale, and her nostrils spread and her eyes snapped. The
-two young men looked dark, but never said nothing. Miss Sophia she
-turned pale, but the color come back when she found the man warn't
-hurt.
-
-Soon as I could get Buck down by the corn-cribs under the trees by
-ourselves, I says:
-
-"Did you want to kill him, Buck?"
-
-"Well, I bet I did."
-
-"What did he do to you?"
-
-"Him? He never done nothing to me."
-
-"Well, then, what did you want to kill him for?"
-
-"Why, nothing--only it's on account of the feud."
-
-"What's a feud?"
-
-"Why, where was you raised? Don't you know what a feud is?"
-
-"Never heard of it before--tell me about it."
-
-"Well," says Buck, "a feud is this way: A man has a quarrel with
-another man, and kills him; then that other man's brother kills _him_;
-then the other brothers, on both sides, goes for one another; then the
-_cousins_ chip in--and by and by everybody's killed off, and there
-ain't no more feud. But it's kind of slow, and takes a long time."
-
-"Has this one been going on long, Buck?"
-
-"Well, I should _reckon!_ It started thirty year ago, or som'ers along
-there. There was trouble 'bout something, and then a lawsuit to settle
-it; and the suit went agin one of the men, and so he up and shot the
-man that won the suit--which he would naturally do, of course. Anybody
-would."
-
-"What was the trouble about. Buck?--land?"
-
-"I reckon maybe--I don't know."
-
-"Well, who done the shooting? Was it a Grangerford Shepherdson?"
-
-"Laws, how do I know? It was so long ago."
-
-"Don't anybody know?"
-
-"Oh, yes, pa knows, I reckon, and some of the other old people; but
-they don't know now what the row was about in the first place."
-
-"Has there been many killed, Buck?"
-
-"Yes; right smart chance of funerals. But they don't always kill. Pa's
-got a few buckshot in him; but he don't mind it 'cuz he don't weigh
-much, anyway. Bob's been carved up some with a bowie, and Tom's been
-hurt once or twice."
-
-"Has anybody been killed this year, Buck?"
-
-"Yes; we got one and they got one. 'Bout three months ago my cousin
-Bud, fourteen year old, was riding through the woods on t'other side
-of the river, and didn't have no weapon with him, which was blame'
-foolishness, and in a lonesome place he hears a horse a-coming behind
-him, and sees old Baldy Shepherdson a-linkin' after him with his gun
-in his hand and his white hair a-flying in the wind; and 'stead of
-jumping off and taking to the brush, Bud 'lowed he could outrun him;
-so they had it, nip and tuck, for five mile or more, the old man
-a-gaining all the time; so at last Bud seen it warn't any use, so he
-stopped and faced around so as to have the bullet-holes in front, you
-know, and the old man he rode up and shot him down. But he didn't git
-much chance to enjoy his luck, for inside of a week our folks laid
-_him_ out."
-
-"I reckon that old man was a coward, Buck."
-
-"I reckon he _warn't_ a coward. Not by a blame' sight. There ain't a
-coward amongst them Shepherdsons--not a one. And there ain't no
-cowards amongst the Grangerfords either. Why, that old man kep' up his
-end in a fight one day for half an hour against three Grangerfords,
-and come out winner. They was all a-horseback; he lit off of his horse
-and got behind a little woodpile, and kep' his horse before him to
-stop the bullets; but the Grangerfords stayed on their horses and
-capered around the old man, and peppered away at him, and he peppered
-away at them. Him and his horse both went home pretty leaky and
-crippled, but the Grangerfords had to be _fetched_ home--and one of
-'em was dead, and another died the next day. No, sir; if a body's out
-hunting for cowards he don't want to fool away any time amongst them
-Shepherdsons, becuz they don't breed any of that _kind_."
-
-Next Sunday we all went to church, about three mile, everybody
-a-horseback. The men took their guns along, so did Buck, and kept them
-between their knees or stood them handy against the wall. The
-Shepherdsons done the same. It was pretty ornery preaching--all about
-brotherly love, and such-like tiresomeness; but everybody said it was
-a good sermon, and they all talked it over going home, and had such a
-powerful lot to say about faith and good works and free grace and
-preforeordestination, and I don't know what all, that it did seem to
-me to be one of the roughest Sundays I had run across yet.
-
-About an hour after dinner everybody was dozing around, some in their
-chairs and some in their rooms, and it got to be pretty dull. Buck and
-a dog was stretched out on the grass in the sun sound asleep. I went
-up to our room, and judged I would take a nap myself. I found that
-sweet Miss Sophia standing in her door, which was next to ours, and
-she took me in her room and shut the door very soft, and asked me if I
-liked her, and I said I did; and she asked me if I would do something
-for her and not tell anybody, and I said I would. Then she said she'd
-forgot her Testament, and left it in the seat at church between two
-other books, and would I slip out quiet and go there and fetch it to
-her, and not say nothing to nobody. I said I would. So I slid out and
-slipped off up the road, and there warn't anybody at the church,
-except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and
-hogs likes a puncheon floor in summer-time because it's cool. If you
-notice, most folks don't go to church only when they've got to; but a
-hog is different.
-
-Says I to myself, something's up; it ain't natural for a girl to be in
-such a sweat about a Testament. So I give it a shake, and out drops a
-little piece of paper with "_Half past two_" wrote on it with a
-pencil. I ransacked it, but couldn't find anything else. I couldn't
-make anything out of that, so I put the paper in the book again, and
-when I got home and upstairs there was Miss Sophia in her door waiting
-for me. She pulled me in and shut the door; then she looked in the
-Testament till she found the paper, and as soon as she read it she
-looked glad; and before a body could think she grabbed me and give me
-a squeeze, and said I was the best boy in the world, and not to tell
-anybody. She was mighty red in the face for a minute, and her eyes
-lighted up, and it made her powerful pretty. I was a good deal
-astonished, but when I got my breath I asked her what the paper was
-about, and she asked me if I had read it, and I said no, and she asked
-me if I could read writing, and I told her "no, only coarse-hand," and
-then she said the paper warn't anything but a book-mark to keep her
-place, and I might go and play now.
-
-I went off down to the river, studying over this thing, and pretty
-soon I noticed that my nigger was following along behind. When we was
-out of sight of the house he looked back and around a second, and then
-comes a-running, and says:
-
-"Mars Jawge, if you'll come down into de swamp I'll show you a whole
-stack o' water-moccasins."
-
-Thinks I, that's mighty curious; he said that yesterday. He oughter
-know a body don't love water-moccasins enough to go around hunting for
-them. What is he up to, anyway? So I says:
-
-"All right; trot ahead."
-
-I followed a half a mile; then he struck out over the swamp, and waded
-ankle-deep as much as another half-mile. We come to a little flat
-piece of land which was dry and very thick with trees and bushes and
-vines, and he says:
-
-"You shove right in dah jist a few steps, Mars Jawge; dah's whah dey
-is. I's seed 'm befo'; I don't k'yer to see 'em no mo'."
-
-Then he slopped right along and went away, and pretty soon the trees
-hid him. I poked into the place a-ways and come to a little open patch
-as big as a bedroom all hung around with vines, and found a man laying
-there asleep--and, by jings, it was my old Jim!
-
-I waked him up, and I reckoned it was going to be a grand surprise to
-him to see me again, but it warn't. He nearly cried he was so glad,
-but he warn't surprised. Said he swum along behind me that night, and
-heard me yell every time, but dasn't answer, because he didn't want
-nobody to pick _him_ up and take him into slavery again. Says he:
-
-"I got hurt a little, en couldn't swim fas', so I wuz a considerable
-ways behine you towards de las'; when you landed I reck'ned I could
-ketch up wid you on de lan' 'dout havin' to shout at you, but when I
-see dat house I begin to go slow. I 'uz off too fur to hear what dey
-say to you--I wuz 'fraid o' de dogs; but when it 'uz all quiet ag'in I
-knowed you's in de house, so I struck out for de woods to wait for
-day. Early in de mawnin' some er de niggers come along, gwyne to de
-fields, en dey tuk me en showed me dis place, whah de dogs can't track
-me on accounts o' de water, en dey brings me truck to eat every night,
-en tells me how you's a-gittin' along."
-
-"Why didn't you tell my Jack to fetch me here sooner, Jim?"
-
-"Well, 'twarn't no use to 'sturb you, Huck, tell we could do
-sumfn--but we's all right now. I ben a-buyin' pots en pans en vittles,
-as I got a chanst, en a-patchin' up de raf' nights when--"
-
-"_What_ raft, Jim?"
-
-"Our ole raf'."
-
-"You mean to say our old raft warn't smashed all to flinders?"
-
-"No, she warn't. She was tore up a good deal--one en' of her was; but
-dey warn't no great harm done, on'y our traps was mos' all los'. Ef we
-hadn' dive' so deep en swum so fur under water, en de night hadn't ben
-so dark, en we warn't so sk'yerd, en ben sich punkin-heads, as de
-sayin' is, we'd a seed de raf'. But it's jis' as well we didn't, 'kase
-now she's all fixed up ag'in mos' as good as new, en we's got a new
-lot o' stuff, in de place o' what 'uz los'."
-
-"Why, how did you get hold of the raft again, Jim--did you catch her?"
-
-"How I gwyne to ketch her en I out in de woods? No; some er de niggers
-foun' her ketched on a snag along heah in de ben', en dey hid her in a
-crick 'mongst de willows, en dey wuz so much jawin' 'bout which un 'um
-she b'long to de mos' dat I come to heah 'bout it pooty soon, so I ups
-en settles de trouble by tellin' 'um she don't b'long to none uv 'um,
-but to you en me; en I ast 'm if dey gwyne to grab a young white
-genlman's propaty, en git a hid'n for it? Den I gin 'm ten cents
-apiece, en dey 'uz mighty well satisfied, en wisht some mo' raf's 'ud
-come along en make 'm rich ag'in. Dey's mighty good to me, dese
-niggers is, en whatever I wants 'm to do fur me I doan' have to ast 'm
-twice, honey. Dat Jack's a good nigger, en pooty smart."
-
-"Yes, he is. He ain't ever told me you was here; told me to come, and
-he'd show me a lot of water-moccasins. If anything happens _he_ ain't
-mixed up in it. He can say he never seen us together, and it 'll be
-the truth."
-
-I don't want to talk much about the next day. I reckon I'll cut it
-pretty short. I waked up about dawn, and was a-going to turn over and
-go to sleep again when I noticed how still it was--didn't seem to be
-anybody stirring. That warn't usual. Next I noticed that Buck was up
-and gone. Well, I gets up, a-wondering, and goes down-stairs--nobody
-around; everything as still as a mouse. Just the same outside. Thinks
-I, what does it mean? Down by the woodpile I comes across my Jack, and
-says:
-
-"What's it all about?"
-
-Says he:
-
-"Don't you know, Mars Jawge?"
-
-"No," says I, "I don't."
-
-"Well, den, Miss Sophia's run off! 'deed she has. She run off in de
-night some time--nobody don't know jis' when; run off to get married
-to dat young Harney Shepherdson, you know--leastways, so dey 'spec. De
-fambly foun' it out 'bout half an hour ago--maybe a little mo'--en' I
-_tell_ you dey warn't no time los'. Sich another hurryin' up guns en
-hosses _you_ never see! De women folks has gone for to stir up de
-relations, en ole Mars Saul en de boys tuck dey guns en rode up de
-river road for to try to ketch dat young man en kill him 'fo' he kin
-git acrost de river wid Miss Sophia. I reck'n dey's gwyne to be mighty
-rough times."
-
-"Buck went off 'thout waking me up."
-
-"Well, I reck'n he _did!_ Dey warn't gwyne to mix you up in it. Mars
-Buck he loaded up his gun en 'lowed he's gwyne to fetch home a
-Shepherdson or bust. Well, dey'll be plenty un 'm dah, I reck'n, en
-you bet you he'll fetch one ef he gits a chanst."
-
-I took up the river road as hard as I could put. By and by I begin to
-hear guns a good ways off. When I came in sight of the log store and
-the woodpile where the steamboats lands I worked along under the trees
-and brush till I got to a good place, and then I clumb up into the
-forks of a cottonwood that was out of reach, and watched. There was a
-wood-rank four foot high a little ways in front of the tree, and first
-I was going to hide behind that; but maybe it was luckier I didn't.
-
-There was four or five men cavorting around on their horses in the
-open place before the log store, cussing and yelling, and trying to
-get at a couple of young chaps that was behind the wood-rank alongside
-of the steamboat-landing; but they couldn't come it. Every time one of
-them showed himself on the river side of the woodpile he got shot at.
-The two boys was squatting back to back behind the pile, so they could
-watch both ways.
-
-By and by the men stopped cavorting around and yelling. They started
-riding towards the store; then up gets one of the boys, draws a steady
-bead over the wood-rank, and drops one of them out of his saddle. All
-the men jumped off of their horses and grabbed the hurt one and
-started to carry him to the store; and that minute the two boys
-started on the run. They got half-way to the tree I was in before the
-men noticed. Then the men see them, and jumped on their horses and
-took out after them. They gained on the boys, but it didn't do no
-good, the boys had too good a start; they got to the woodpile that was
-in front of my tree, and slipped in behind it, and so they had the
-bulge on the men again. One of the boys was Buck, and the other was a
-slim young chap about nineteen years old.
-
-The men ripped around awhile, and then rode away. As soon as they was
-out of sight I sung out to Buck and told him. He didn't know what to
-make of my voice coming out of the tree at first. He was awful
-surprised. He told me to watch out sharp and let him know when the men
-come in sight again; said they was up to some devilment or
-other--wouldn't be gone long. I wished I was out of that tree, but I
-dasn't come down. Buck begun to cry and rip, and 'lowed that him and
-his cousin Joe (that was the other young chap) would make up for this
-day yet. He said his father and his two brothers was killed, and two
-or three of the enemy. Said the Shepherdsons laid for them in ambush.
-Buck said his father and brothers ought to waited for their
-relations--the Shepherdsons was too strong for them. I asked him what
-was become of young Harney and Miss Sophia. He said they'd got across
-the river and was safe. I was glad of that; but the way Buck did take
-on because he didn't manage to kill Harney that day he shot at him--I
-hain't ever heard anything like it.
-
-All of a sudden, bang! bang! bang! goes three or four guns--the men
-had slipped around through the woods and come in from behind without
-their horses! The boys jumped for the river--both of them hurt--and as
-they swum down the current the men run along the bank shooting at them
-and singing out, "Kill them, kill them!" It made me so sick I most
-fell out of the tree. I ain't a-going to tell _all_ that happened--it
-would make me sick again if I was to do that. I wished I hadn't ever
-come ashore that night to see such things. I ain't ever going to get
-shut of them--lots of times I dream about them.
-
-I stayed in the tree till it begun to get dark, afraid to come down.
-Sometimes I heard guns away off in the woods; and twice I seen little
-gangs of men gallop past the log store with guns; so I reckoned the
-trouble was still a-going on. I was mighty downhearted; so I made up
-my mind I wouldn't ever go anear that house again, because I reckoned
-I was to blame, somehow. I judged that that piece of paper meant that
-Miss Sophia was to meet Harney somewheres at half past two and run
-off; and I judged I ought to told her father about that paper and the
-curious way she acted, and then maybe he would 'a' locked her up, and
-this awful mess wouldn't ever happened.
-
-When I got down out of the tree I crept along down the river-bank a
-piece, and found the two bodies laying in the edge of the water, and
-tugged at them till I got them ashore; then I covered up their faces,
-and got away as quick as I could. I cried a little when I was covering
-up Buck's face, for he was mighty good to me.
-
-It was just dark now. I never went near the house, but struck through
-the woods and made for the swamp. Jim warn't on his island, so I
-tramped off in a hurry for the crick, and crowded through the willows,
-red-hot to jump aboard and get out of that awful country. The raft was
-gone! My souls, but I was scared! I couldn't get my breath for most a
-minute. Then I raised a yell. A voice not twenty-five foot from me
-says:
-
-"Good lan'! is dat you, honey? Doan' make no noise."
-
-It was Jim's voice--nothing ever sounded so good before. I run along
-the bank a piece and got aboard, and Jim he grabbed me and hugged me,
-he was so glad to see me. He says:
-
-"Laws bless you, chile, I 'uz right down sho' you's dead ag'in. Jack's
-been heah; he say he reck'n you's ben shot, kase you didn' come home
-no mo'; so I's jes' dis minute a-startin' startin' de raf' down
-towards de mouf er de crick, so's to be all ready for to shove out en
-leave soon as Jack comes ag'in en tells me for certain you _is_ dead.
-Lawsy, I's mighty glad to git you back ag'in, honey."
-
-I says:
-
-"All right--that's mighty good; they won't find me, and they'll think
-I've been killed, and floated down the river--there's something up
-there that 'll help them think so--so don't you lose no time, Jim, but
-just shove off for the big water as fast as ever you can."
-
-I never felt easy till the raft was two mile below there and out in
-the middle of the Mississippi. Then we hung up our signal lantern, and
-judged that we was free and safe once more. I hadn't had a bite to eat
-since yesterday, so Jim he got out some corn-dodgers and buttermilk,
-and pork and cabbage and greens--there ain't nothing in the world so
-good when it's cooked right--and whilst I eat my supper we talked and
-had a good time. I was powerful glad to get away from the feuds, and
-so was Jim to get away from the swamp. We said there warn't no home
-like a raft, after all. Other places do seem so cramped up and
-smothery, but a raft don't. You feel mighty free and easy and
-comfortable on a raft.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XIX
-
-
-Two or three days and nights went by; I reckon I might say they swum
-by, they slid along so quiet and smooth and lovely. Here is the way we
-put in the time. It was a monstrous big river down there--sometimes a
-mile and a half wide; we run nights, and laid up and hid daytimes;
-soon as night was most gone we stopped navigating and tied up--nearly
-always in the dead water under a towhead; and then cut young
-cottonwoods and willows, and hid the raft with them. Then we set out
-the lines. Next we slid into the river and had a swim, so as to
-freshen up and cool off; then we set down on the sandy bottom where
-the water was about knee-deep, and watched the daylight come. Not a
-sound anywheres--perfectly still--just like the whole world was
-asleep, only sometimes the bullfrogs a-cluttering, maybe. The first
-thing to see, looking away over the water, was a kind of dull
-line--that was the woods on t'other side; you couldn't make nothing
-else out; then a pale place in the sky; then more paleness spreading
-around; then the river softened up away off, and warn't black any
-more, but gray; you could see little dark spots drifting along ever so
-far away--trading-scows, and such things; and long black
-streaks--rafts; sometimes you could hear a sweep screaking; or
-jumbled-up voices, it was so still, and sounds come so far; and by and
-by you could see a streak on the water which you know by the look of
-the streak that there's a snag there in a swift current which breaks
-on it and makes that streak look that way; and you see the mist curl
-up off of the water, and the east reddens up, and the river, and you
-make out a log cabin in the edge of the woods, away on the bank on
-t'other side of the river, being a wood-yard, likely, and piled by
-them cheats so you can throw a dog through it anywheres; then the nice
-breeze springs up, and comes fanning you from over there, so cool and
-fresh and sweet to smell on account of the woods and the flowers; but
-sometimes not that way, because they've left dead fish laying around,
-gars and such, and they do get pretty rank; and next you've got the
-full day, and everything smiling in the sun, and the song-birds just
-going it!
-
-A little smoke couldn't be noticed now, so we would take some fish off
-of the lines and cook up a hot breakfast. And afterwards we would
-watch the lonesomeness of the river, and kind of lazy along, and by
-and by lazy off to sleep. Wake up by and by, and look to see what done
-it, and maybe see a steamboat coughing along up-stream, so far off
-towards the other side you couldn't tell nothing about her only
-whether she was a stern-wheel or side-wheel; then for about an hour
-there wouldn't be nothing to hear nor nothing to see--just solid
-lonesomeness. Next you'd see a raft sliding by, away off yonder, and
-maybe a galoot on it chopping, because they're most always doing it on
-a raft; you'd see the ax flash and come down--you don't hear nothing;
-you see that ax go up again, and by the time it's above the man's head
-then you hear the _k'chunk!_--it had took all that time to come over
-the water. So we would put in the day, lazying around, listening to
-the stillness. Once there was a thick fog, and the rafts and things
-that went by was beating tin pans so the steamboats wouldn't run over
-them. A scow or a raft went by so close we could hear them talking and
-cussing and laughing--heard them plain; but we couldn't see no sign of
-them; it made you feel crawly; it was like spirits carrying on that
-way in the air. Jim said he believed it was spirits; but I says:
-
-"No; spirits wouldn't say, 'Dern the dern fog.'"
-
-Soon as it was night out we shoved; when we got her out to about the
-middle we let her alone, and let her float wherever the current wanted
-her to; then we lit the pipes, and dangled our legs in the water, and
-talked about all kinds of things--we was always naked, day and night,
-whenever the mosquitoes would let us--the new clothes Buck's folks
-made for me was too good to be comfortable, and besides I didn't go
-much on clothes, nohow.
-
-Sometimes we'd have that whole river all to ourselves for the longest
-time. Yonder was the banks and the islands, across the water; and
-maybe a spark--which was a candle in a cabin window; and sometimes on
-the water you could see a spark or two--on a raft or a scow, you know;
-and maybe you could hear a fiddle or a song coming over from one of
-them crafts. It's lovely to live on a raft. We had the sky up there,
-all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up
-at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just
-happened. Jim he allowed they was made, but I allowed they happened; I
-judged it would have took too long to _make_ so many. Jim said the
-moon could 'a' _laid_ them; well, that looked kind of reasonable, so I
-didn't say nothing against it, because I've seen a frog lay most as
-many, so of course it could be done. We used to watch the stars that
-fell, too, and see them streak down. Jim allowed they'd got spoiled
-and was hove out of the nest.
-
-Once or twice of a night we would see a steamboat slipping along in
-the dark, and now and then she would belch a whole world of sparks up
-out of her chimbleys, and they would rain down in the river and look
-awful pretty; then she would turn a corner and her lights would wink
-out and her powwow shut off and leave the river still again; and by
-and by her waves would get to us, a long time after she was gone, and
-joggle the raft a bit, and after that you wouldn't hear nothing for
-you couldn't tell how long, except maybe frogs or something.
-
-After midnight the people on shore went to bed, and then for two or
-three hours the shores was black--no more sparks in the cabin windows.
-These sparks was our clock--the first one that showed again meant
-morning was coming, so we hunted a place to hide and tie up right
-away.
-
-One morning about daybreak I found a canoe and crossed over a chute to
-the main shore--it was only two hundred yards--and paddled about a
-mile up a crick amongst the cypress woods, to see if I couldn't get
-some berries. Just as I was passing a place where a kind of a cowpath
-crossed the crick, here comes a couple of men tearing up the path as
-tight as they could foot it. I thought I was a goner, for whenever
-anybody was after anybody I judged it was _me_--or maybe Jim. I was
-about to dig out from there in a hurry, but they was pretty close to
-me then, and sung out and begged me to save their lives--said they
-hadn't been doing nothing, and was being chased for it--said there was
-men and dogs a-coming. They wanted to jump right in, but I says:
-
-"Don't you do it. I don't hear the dogs and horses yet; you've got
-time to crowd through the brush and get up the crick a little ways;
-then you take to the water and wade down to me and get in--that 'll
-throw the dogs off the scent."
-
-They done it, and soon as they was aboard I lit out for our towhead,
-and in about five or ten minutes we heard the dogs and the men away
-off, shouting. We heard them come along towards the crick, but
-couldn't see them; they seemed to stop and fool around awhile; then,
-as we got further and further away all the time, we couldn't hardly
-hear them at all; by the time we had left a mile of woods behind us
-and struck the river, everything was quiet, and we paddled over to the
-towhead and hid in the cottonwoods and was safe.
-
-One of these fellows was about seventy or upwards, and had a bald head
-and very gray whiskers. He had an old battered-up slouch hat on, and a
-greasy blue woolen shirt, and ragged old blue jeans britches stuffed
-into his boot-tops, and home-knit galluses--no, he only had one. He
-had an old long-tailed blue jeans coat with slick brass buttons flung
-over his arm, and both of them had big, fat, ratty-looking
-carpet-bags.
-
-The other fellow was about thirty, and dressed about as ornery. After
-breakfast we all laid off and talked, and the first thing that come
-out was that these chaps didn't know one another.
-
-"What got you into trouble?" says the baldhead to t'other chap.
-
-"Well, I'd been selling an article to take the tartar off the
-teeth--and it does take it off, too, and generly the enamel along with
-it--but I stayed about one night longer than I ought to, and was just
-in the act of sliding out when I ran across you on the trail this side
-of town, and you told me they were coming, and begged me to help you
-to get off. So I told you I was expecting trouble myself, and would
-scatter out _with_ you. That's the whole yarn--what's yourn?"
-
-"Well, I'd ben a-runnin' a little temperance revival thar 'bout a
-week, and was the pet of the women folks, big and little, for I was
-makin' it mighty warm for the rummies, I _tell_ you, and takin' as
-much as five or six dollars a night--ten cents a head, children and
-niggers free--and business a-growin' all the time, when somehow or
-another a little report got around last night that I had a way of
-puttin' in my time with a private jug on the sly. A nigger rousted me
-out this mornin', and told me the people was getherin' on the quiet
-with their dogs and horses, and they'd be along pretty soon and give
-me 'bout half an hour's start, and then run me down if they could; and
-if they got me they'd tar and feather me and ride me on a rail, sure.
-I didn't wait for no breakfast--I warn't hungry."
-
-"Old man," said the young one, "I reckon we might double-team it
-together; what do you think?"
-
-"I ain't undisposed. What's your line--mainly?"
-
-"Jour printer by trade; do a little in patent medicines;
-theater-actor--tragedy, you know; take a turn to mesmerism and
-phrenology when there's a chance; teach singing-geography school for a
-change; sling a lecture sometimes--oh, I do lots of things--most
-anything that comes handy, so it ain't work. What's your lay?"
-
-"I've done considerble in the doctoring way in my time. Layin' on o'
-hands is my best holt--for cancer and paralysis, and sich things; and
-I k'n tell a fortune pretty good when I've got somebody along to find
-out the facts for me. Preachin's my line, too, and workin'
-camp-meetin's, and missionaryin' around."
-
-Nobody never said anything for a while; then the young man hove a sigh
-and says:
-
-"Alas!"
-
-"What 're you alassin' about?" says the baldhead.
-
-"To think I should have lived to be leading such a life, and be
-degraded down into such company." And he begun to wipe the corner of
-his eye with a rag.
-
-"Dern your skin, ain't the company good enough for you?" says the
-baldhead, pretty pert and uppish.
-
-"Yes, it _is_ good enough for me; it's as good as I deserve; for who
-fetched me so low when I was so high? I did myself. I don't blame
-_you_, gentlemen--far from it; I don't blame anybody. I deserve it
-all. Let the cold world do its worst; one thing I know--there's a
-grave somewhere for me. The world may go on just as it's always done,
-and take everything from me--loved ones, property, everything; but it
-can't take that. Some day I'll lie down in it and forget it all, and
-my poor broken heart will be at rest." He went on a-wiping.
-
-"Drot your pore broken heart," says the baldhead; "what are you
-heaving your pore broken heart at _us_ f'r? _We_ hain't done nothing."
-
-"No, I know you haven't. I ain't blaming you, gentlemen. I
-brought myself down--yes, I did it myself. It's right I should
-suffer--perfectly right--I don't make any moan."
-
-"Brought you down from whar? Whar was you brought down from?"
-
-"Ah, you would not believe me; the world never believes--let it
-pass--'tis no matter. The secret of my birth--"
-
-"The secret of your birth! Do you mean to say--"
-
-"Gentlemen," says the young man, very solemn, "I will reveal it to
-you, for I feel I may have confidence in you. By rights I am a duke!"
-
-Jim's eyes bugged out when he heard that; and I reckon mine did, too.
-Then the baldhead says: "No! you can't mean it?"
-
-"Yes. My great-grandfather, eldest son of the Duke of Bridgewater,
-fled to this country about the end of the last century, to breathe the
-pure air of freedom; married here, and died, leaving a son, his own
-father dying about the same time. The second son of the late duke
-seized the titles and estates--the infant real duke was ignored. I am
-the lineal descendant of that infant--I am the rightful Duke of
-Bridgewater; and here am I, forlorn, torn from my high estate, hunted
-of men, despised by the cold world, ragged, worn, heartbroken, and
-degraded to the companionship of felons on a raft!"
-
-Jim pitied him ever so much, and so did I. We tried to comfort him,
-but he said it warn't much use, he couldn't be much comforted; said if
-we was a mind to acknowledge him, that would do him more good than
-most anything else; so we said we would, if he would tell us how. He
-said we ought to bow when we spoke to him, and say "Your Grace," or
-"My Lord," or "Your Lordship"--and he wouldn't mind it if we called
-him plain "Bridgewater," which, he said, was a title anyway, and not a
-name; and one of us ought to wait on him at dinner, and do any little
-thing for him he wanted done.
-
-Well, that was all easy, so we done it. All through dinner Jim stood
-around and waited on him, and says, "Will yo' Grace have some o' dis
-or some o' dat?" and so on, and a body could see it was mighty
-pleasing to him.
-
-But the old man got pretty silent by and by--didn't have much to say,
-and didn't look pretty comfortable over all that petting that was
-going on around that duke. He seemed to have something on his mind.
-So, along in the afternoon, he says:
-
-"Looky here, Bilgewater," he says, "I'm nation sorry for you, but you
-ain't the only person that's had troubles like that."
-
-"No?"
-
-"No, you ain't. You ain't the only person that's ben snaked down
-wrongfully out'n a high place."
-
-"Alas!"
-
-"No, you ain't the only person that's had a secret of his birth." And,
-by jings, _he_ begins to cry.
-
-"Hold!  What do you mean?"
-
-"Bilgewater, kin I trust you?" says the old man, still sort of
-sobbing.
-
-"To the bitter death!" He took the old man by the hand and squeezed
-it, and says, "That secret of your being: speak!"
-
-"Bilgewater, I am the late Dauphin!"
-
-You bet you, Jim and me stared this time. Then the duke says:
-
-"You are what?"
-
-"Yes, my friend, it is too true--your eyes is lookin' at this very
-moment on the pore disappeared Dauphin, Looy the Seventeen, son of
-Looy the Sixteen and Marry Antonette."
-
-"You! At your age! No! You mean you're the late Charlemagne; you must
-be six or seven hundred years old, at the very least."
-
-"Trouble has done it, Bilgewater, trouble has done it; trouble has
-brung these gray hairs and this premature balditude. Yes, gentlemen,
-you see before you, in blue jeans and misery, the wanderin', exiled,
-trampled-on, and sufferin' rightful King of France."
-
-Well, he cried and took on so that me and Jim didn't know hardly what
-to do, we was so sorry--and so glad and proud we'd got him with us,
-too. So we set in, like we done before with the duke, and tried to
-comfort _him._ But he said it warn't no use, nothing but to be dead
-and done with it all could do him any good; though he said it often
-made him feel easier and better for a while if people treated him
-according to his rights, and got down on one knee to speak to him, and
-always called him "Your Majesty," and waited on him first at meals,
-and didn't set down in his presence till he asked them. So Jim and me
-set to majestying him, and doing this and that and t'other for him,
-and standing up till he told us we might set down. This done him heaps
-of good, and so he got cheerful and comfortable. But the duke kind of
-soured on him, and didn't look a bit satisfied with the way things was
-going; still, the king acted real friendly towards him, and said the
-duke's great-grandfather and all the other Dukes of Bilgewater was a
-good deal thought of by _his_ father, and was allowed to come to the
-palace considerable; but the duke stayed huffy a good while, till by
-and by the king says:
-
-"Like as not we got to be together a blamed long time on this h-yer
-raft, Bilgewater, and so what's the use o' your bein' sour? It 'll
-only make things oncomfortable. It ain't my fault I warn't born a
-duke, it ain't your fault you warn't born a king--so what's the use to
-worry? Make the best o' things the way you find 'em, says I--that's my
-motto. This ain't no bad thing that we've struck here--plenty grub and
-an easy life--come, give us your hand, duke, and le's all be friends."
-
-The duke done it, and Jim and me was pretty glad to see it. It took
-away all the uncomfortableness and we felt mighty good over it,
-because it would 'a' been a miserable business to have any
-unfriendliness on the raft; for what you want, above all things, on a
-raft, is for everybody to be satisfied, and feel right and kind
-towards the others.
-
-It didn't take me long to make up my mind that these liars warn't no
-kings nor dukes at all, but just low-down humbugs and frauds. But I
-never said nothing, never let on; kept it to myself; it's the best
-way; then you don't have no quarrels, and don't get into no trouble.
-If they wanted us to call them kings and dukes, I hadn't no
-objections, 'long as it would keep peace in the family; and it warn't
-no use to tell Jim, so I didn't tell him. If I never learnt nothing
-else out of pap, I learnt that the best way to get along with his kind
-of people is to let them have their own way.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XX
-
-
-They asked us considerable many questions; wanted to know what we
-covered up the raft that way for, and laid by in the daytime instead
-of running--was Jim a runaway nigger? Says I:
-
-"Goodness sakes! would a runaway nigger run _south?_"
-
-No, they allowed he wouldn't. I had to account for things some way, so
-I says:
-
-"My folks was living in Pike County, in Missouri, where I was born,
-and they all died off but me and pa and my brother Ike. Pa, he 'lowed
-he'd break up and go down and live with Uncle Ben, who's got a little
-one-horse place on the river forty-four mile below Orleans. Pa was
-pretty poor, and had some debts; so when he'd squared up there warn't
-nothing left but sixteen dollars and our nigger, Jim. That warn't
-enough to take us fourteen hundred mile, deck passage nor no other
-way. Well, when the river rose pa had a streak of luck one day; he
-ketched this piece of a raft; so we reckoned we'd go down to Orleans
-on it. Pa's luck didn't hold out; a steamboat run over the forrard
-corner of the raft one night, and we all went overboard and dove under
-the wheel; Jim and me come up all right, but pa was drunk, and Ike was
-only four years old, so they never come up no more. Well, for the next
-day or two we had considerable trouble, because people was always
-coming out in skiffs and trying to take Jim away from me, saying they
-believed he was a runaway nigger. We don't run daytimes no more now;
-nights they don't bother us."
-
-The duke says:
-
-"Leave me alone to cipher out a way so we can run in the daytime if we
-want to. I'll think the thing over--I'll invent a plan that 'll fix
-it. We'll let it alone for to-day, because of course we don't want to
-go by that town yonder in daylight--it mightn't be healthy."
-
-Towards night it begun to darken up and look like rain; the
-heat-lightning was squirting around low down in the sky, and the
-leaves was beginning to shiver--it was going to be pretty ugly, it was
-easy to see that. So the duke and the king went to overhauling our
-wigwam, to see what the beds was like. My bed was a straw tick--better
-than Jim's, which was a corn-shuck tick; there's always cobs around
-about in a shuck tick, and they poke into you and hurt; and when you
-roll over the dry shucks sound like you was rolling over in a pile of
-dead leaves; it makes such a rustling that you wake up. Well, the duke
-allowed he would take my bed; but the king allowed he wouldn't. He
-says:
-
-"I should 'a' reckoned the difference in rank would a sejested to you
-that a corn-shuck bed warn't just fitten for me to sleep on. Your
-Grace 'll take the shuck bed yourself."
-
-Jim and me was in a sweat again for a minute, being afraid there was
-going to be some more trouble amongst them; so we was pretty glad when
-the duke says:
-
-"'Tis my fate to be always ground into the mire under the iron heel of
-oppression. Misfortune has broken my once haughty spirit; I yield, I
-submit; 'tis my fate. I am alone in the world--let me suffer; I can
-bear it."
-
-We got away as soon as it was good and dark. The king told us to stand
-well out towards the middle of the river, and not show a light till we
-got a long ways below the town. We come in sight of the little bunch
-of lights by and by--that was the town, you know--and slid by, about a
-half a mile out, all right. When we was three-quarters of a mile below
-we hoisted up our signal lantern; and about ten o'clock it come on to
-rain and blow and thunder and lighten like everything; so the king
-told us to both stay on watch till the weather got better; then him
-and the duke crawled into the wigwam and turned in for the night. It
-was my watch below till twelve, but I wouldn't 'a' turned in anyway if
-I'd had a bed, because a body don't see such a storm as that every day
-in the week, not by a long sight. My souls, how the wind did scream
-along! And every second or two there'd come a glare that lit up the
-white-caps for a half a mile around, and you'd see the islands looking
-dusty through the rain, and the trees thrashing around in the wind;
-then comes a _h-whack!_--bum! bum! bumble-umble-um-bum-bum-bum-bum--and
-the thunder would go rumbling and grumbling away, and quit--and then
-_rip_ comes another flash and another sock-dolager. The waves most
-washed me off the raft sometimes, but I hadn't any clothes on, and
-didn't mind. We didn't have no trouble about snags; the lightning
-was glaring and flittering around so constant that we could see them
-plenty soon enough to throw her head this way or that and miss them.
-
-I had the middle watch, you know, but I was pretty sleepy by that
-time, so Jim he said he would stand the first half of it for me; he
-was always mighty good that way, Jim was. I crawled into the wigwam,
-but the king and the duke had their legs sprawled around so there
-warn't no show for me; so I laid outside--I didn't mind the rain,
-because it was warm, and the waves warn't running so high now. About
-two they come up again, though, and Jim was going to call me; but he
-changed his mind, because he reckoned they warn't high enough yet to
-do any harm; but he was mistaken about that, for pretty soon all of a
-sudden along comes a regular ripper and washed me overboard. It most
-killed Jim a-laughing. He was the easiest nigger to laugh that ever
-was, anyway.
-
-I took the watch, and Jim he laid down and snored away; and by and by
-the storm let up for good and all; and the first cabin-light that
-showed I rousted him out, and we slid the raft into hiding-quarters
-for the day.
-
-The king got out an old ratty deck of cards after breakfast, and him
-and the duke played seven-up awhile, five cents a game. Then they got
-tired of it, and allowed they would "lay out a campaign," as they
-called it. The duke went down into his carpet-bag, and fetched up a
-lot of little printed bills and read them out loud. One bill said,
-"The celebrated Dr. Armand de Montalban, of Paris," would "lecture on
-the Science of Phrenology" at such and such a place, on the blank day
-of blank, at ten cents admission, and "furnish charts of character at
-twenty-five cents apiece." The duke said that was _him._ In another
-bill he was the "world-renowned Shakespearian tragedian, Garrick the
-Younger, of Drury Lane, London." In other bills he had a lot of other
-names and done other wonderful things, like finding water and gold
-with a "divining-rod," "dissipating witch spells," and so on. By and
-by he says:
-
-"But the histrionic muse is the darling. Have you ever trod the
-boards, Royalty?"
-
-"No," says the king.
-
-"You shall, then, before you're three days older, Fallen Grandeur,"
-says the duke. "The first good town we come to we'll hire a hall and
-do the swordfight in 'Richard III.' and the balcony scene in 'Romeo
-and Juliet.' How does that strike you?"
-
-"I'm in, up to the hub, for anything that will pay, Bilgewater; but,
-you see, I don't know nothing about play-actin', and hain't ever seen
-much of it. I was too small when pap used to have 'em at the palace.
-Do you reckon you can learn me?"
-
-"Easy!"
-
-"All right. I'm jist a-freezin' for something fresh, anyway. Le's
-commence right away."
-
-So the duke he told him all about who Romeo was and who Juliet was,
-and said he was used to being Romeo, so the king could be Juliet.
-
-"But if Juliet's such a young gal, duke, my peeled head and my white
-whiskers is goin' to look oncommon odd on her, maybe."
-
-"No, don't you worry; these country jakes won't ever think of that.
-Besides, you know, you'll be in costume, and that makes all the
-difference in the world; Juliet's in a balcony, enjoying the moonlight
-before she goes to bed, and she's got on her nightgown and her ruffled
-nightcap. Here are the costumes for the parts."
-
-He got out two or three curtain-calico suits, which he said was
-meedyevil armor for Richard III. and t'other chap, and a long white
-cotton nightshirt and a ruffled nightcap to match. The king was
-satisfied; so the duke got out his book and read the parts over in the
-most splendid spread-eagle way, prancing around and acting at the same
-time, to show how it had got to be done; then he give the book to the
-king and told him to get his part by heart.
-
-There was a little one-horse town about three mile down the bend, and
-after dinner the duke said he had ciphered out his idea about how to
-run in daylight without it being dangersome for Jim; so he allowed he
-would go down to the town and fix that thing. The king allowed he
-would go, too, and see if he couldn't strike something. We was out of
-coffee, so Jim said I better go along with them in the canoe and get
-some.
-
-When we got there there warn't nobody stirring; streets empty, and
-perfectly dead and still, like Sunday. We found a sick nigger sunning
-himself in a back yard, and he said everybody that warn't too young or
-too sick or too old was gone to camp-meeting, about two mile back in
-the woods. The king got the directions, and allowed he'd go and work
-that camp-meeting for all it was worth, and I might go, too.
-
-The duke said what he was after was a printing-office. We found it; a
-little bit of a concern, up over a carpenter-shop--carpenters and
-printers all gone to the meeting, and no doors locked. It was a dirty,
-littered-up place, and had ink-marks, and handbills with pictures of
-horses and runaway niggers on them, all over the walls. The duke shed
-his coat and said he was all right now. So me and the king lit out for
-the camp-meeting.
-
-We got there in about a half an hour fairly dripping, for it was a
-most awful hot day. There was as much as a thousand people there from
-twenty mile around. The woods was full of teams and wagons, hitched
-everywheres, feeding out of the wagon-troughs and stomping to keep off
-the flies. There was sheds made out of poles and roofed over with
-branches, where they had lemonade and gingerbread to sell, and piles
-of watermelons and green corn and such-like truck.
-
-The preaching was going on under the same kinds of sheds, only they
-was bigger and held crowds of people. The benches was made out of
-outside slabs of logs, with holes bored in the round side to drive
-sticks into for legs. They didn't have no backs. The preachers had
-high platforms to stand on at one end of the sheds. The women had on
-sun-bonnets; and some had linsey-woolsey frocks, some gingham ones,
-and a few of the young ones had on calico. Some of the young men was
-barefooted, and some of the children didn't have on any clothes but
-just a tow-linen shirt. Some of the old women was knitting, and some
-of the young folks was courting on the sly.
-
-The first shed we come to the preacher was lining out a hymn. He lined
-out two lines, everybody sung it, and it was kind of grand to hear it,
-there was so many of them and they done it in such a rousing way; then
-he lined out two more for them to sing--and so on. The people woke up
-more and more, and sung louder and louder; and towards the end some
-begun to groan, and some begun to shout. Then the preacher begun to
-preach, and begun in earnest, too; and went weaving first to one side
-of the platform and then the other, and then a-leaning down over the
-front of it, with his arms and his body going all the time, and
-shouting his words out with all his might; and every now and then he
-would hold up his Bible and spread it open, and kind of pass it around
-this way and that, shouting, "It's the brazen serpent in the
-wilderness! Look upon it and live!" And people would shout out,
-"Glory!--A-a-_men_!" And so he went on, and the people groaning and
-crying and saying amen:
-
-"Oh, come to the mourners' bench! come, black with sin! (_amen!_)
-come, sick and sore! (_amen!_) come, lame and halt and blind!
-(_amen!_) come, pore and needy, sunk in shame! (_a-a-men!_) come, all
-that's worn and soiled and suffering!--come with a broken spirit! come
-with a contrite heart! come in your rags and sin and dirt! the waters
-that cleanse is free, the door of heaven stands open--oh, enter in and
-be at rest!" (_a-a-men! glory, glory hallelujah!_)
-
-And so on. You couldn't make out what the preacher said any more, on
-account of the shouting and crying. Folks got up everywheres in the
-crowd, and worked their way just by main strength to the mourners'
-bench, with the tears running down their faces; and when all the
-mourners had got up there to the front benches in a crowd, they sung
-and shouted and flung themselves down on the straw, just crazy and
-wild.
-
-Well, the first I knowed the king got a-going, and you could hear him
-over everybody; and next he went a-charging up onto the platform, and
-the preacher he begged him to speak to the people, and he done it. He
-told them he was a pirate--been a pirate for thirty years out in the
-Indian Ocean--and his crew was thinned out considerable last spring in
-a fight, and he was home now to take out some fresh men, and thanks to
-goodness he'd been robbed last night and put ashore off of a steamboat
-without a cent, and he was glad of it; it was the blessedest thing
-that ever happened to him, because he was a changed man now, and happy
-for the first time in his life; and, poor as he was, he was going to
-start right off and work his way back to the Indian Ocean, and put in
-the rest of his life trying to turn the pirates into the true path;
-for he could do it better than anybody else, being acquainted with all
-pirate crews in that ocean; and though it would take him a long time
-to get there without money, he would get there anyway, and every time
-he convinced a pirate he would say to him, "Don't you thank me, don't
-you give me no credit; it all belongs to them dear people in Pokeville
-camp-meeting, natural brothers and benefactors of the race, and that
-dear preacher there, the truest friend a pirate ever had!"
-
-And then he busted into tears, and so did everybody. Then somebody
-sings out, "Take up a collection for him, take up a collection!" Well,
-a half a dozen made a jump to do it, but somebody sings out, "Let
-_him_ pass the hat around!" Then everybody said it, the preacher too.
-
-So the king went all through the crowd with his hat, swabbing his
-eyes, and blessing the people and praising them and thanking them for
-being so good to the poor pirates away off there; and every little
-while the prettiest kind of girls, with the tears running down their
-cheeks, would up and ask him would he let them kiss him for to
-remember him by; and he always done it; and some of them he hugged and
-kissed as many as five or six times--and he was invited to stay a
-week; and everybody wanted him to live in their houses, and said
-they'd think it was an honor; but he said as this was the last day of
-the camp-meeting he couldn't do no good, and besides he was in a sweat
-to get to the Indian Ocean right off and go to work on the pirates.
-
-When we got back to the raft and he come to count up he found he had
-collected eighty-seven dollars and seventy-five cents. And then he had
-fetched away a three-gallon jug of whisky, too, that he found under a
-wagon when he was starting home through the woods. The king said, take
-it all around, it laid over any day he'd ever put in in the
-missionarying line. He said it warn't no use talking, heathens don't
-amount to shucks alongside of pirates to work a camp-meeting with.
-
-The duke was thinking _he'd_ been doing pretty well till the king
-come to show up, but after that he didn't think so so much. He
-had set up and printed off two little jobs for farmers in that
-printing-office--horse bills--and took the money, four dollars. And he
-had got in ten dollars' worth of advertisements for the paper, which
-he said he would put in for four dollars if they would pay in
-advance--so they done it. The price of the paper was two dollars a
-year, but he took in three subscriptions for half a dollar apiece on
-condition of them paying him in advance; they were going to pay in
-cordwood and onions as usual, but he said he had just bought the
-concern and knocked down the price as low as he could afford it, and
-was going to run it for cash. He set up a little piece of poetry,
-which he made, himself, out of his own head--three verses--kind of
-sweet and saddish--the name of it was, "Yes, crush, cold world, this
-breaking heart"--and he left that all set up and ready to print in the
-paper, and didn't charge nothing for it. Well, he took in nine dollars
-and a half, and said he'd done a pretty square day's work for it.
-
-Then he showed us another little job he'd printed and hadn't charged
-for, because it was for us. It had a picture of a runaway nigger with
-a bundle on a stick over his shoulder, and "$200 reward" under it. The
-reading was all about Jim and just described him to a dot. It said he
-run away from St. Jacques's plantation, forty mile below New Orleans,
-last winter, and likely went north, and whoever would catch him and
-send him back he could have the reward and expenses.
-
-"Now," says the duke, "after to-night we can run in the daytime if we
-want to. Whenever we see anybody coming we can tie Jim hand and foot
-with a rope, and lay him in the wigwam and show this handbill and say
-we captured him up the river, and were too poor to travel on a
-steamboat, so we got this little raft on credit from our friends and
-are going down to get the reward. Handcuffs and chains would look
-still better on Jim, but it wouldn't go well with the story of us
-being so poor. Too much like jewelry. Ropes are the correct thing--we
-must preserve the unities, as we say on the boards."
-
-We all said the duke was pretty smart, and there couldn't be no
-trouble about running daytimes. We judged we could make miles enough
-that night to get out of the reach of the powwow we reckoned the
-duke's work in the printing-office was going to make in that little
-town; then we could boom right along if we wanted to.
-
-We laid low and kept still, and never shoved out till nearly ten
-o'clock; then we slid by, pretty wide away from the town, and didn't
-hoist our lantern till we was clear out of sight of it.
-
-When Jim called me to take the watch at four in the morning, he says:
-
-"Huck, does you reck'n we gwyne to run acrost any mo' kings on dis
-trip?"
-
-"No," I says, "I reckon not."
-
-"Well," says he, "dat's all right, den. I doan' mine one er two kings,
-but dat's enough. Dis one's powerful drunk, en de duke ain' much
-better."
-
-I found Jim had been trying to get him to talk French, so he could
-hear what it was like; but he said he had been in this country so
-long, and had so much trouble, he'd forgot it.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXI
-
-
-It was after sun-up now, but we went right on and didn't tie up. The
-king and the duke turned out by and by looking pretty rusty; but after
-they'd jumped overboard and took a swim it chippered them up a good
-deal. After breakfast the king he took a seat on the corner of the
-raft, and pulled off his boots and rolled up his britches, and let his
-legs dangle in the water, so as to be comfortable, and lit his pipe,
-and went to getting his "Romeo and Juliet" by heart. When he had got
-it pretty good him and the duke begun to practise it together. The
-duke had to learn him over and over again how to say every speech; and
-he made him sigh, and put his hand on his heart, and after a while he
-said he done it pretty well; "only," he says, "you mustn't bellow out
-_Romeo!_ that way, like a bull--you must say it soft and sick and
-languishy, so--R-o-o-meo! that is the idea; for Juliet's a dear sweet
-mere child of a girl, you know, and she doesn't bray like a jackass."
-
-Well, next they got out a couple of long swords that the duke made out
-of oak laths, and begun to practise the sword-fight--the duke called
-himself Richard III.; and the way they laid on and pranced around the
-raft was grand to see. But by and by the king tripped and fell
-overboard, and after that they took a rest, and had a talk about all
-kinds of adventures they'd had in other times along the river.
-
-After dinner the duke says:
-
-"Well, Capet, we'll want to make this a first-class show, you know, so
-I guess we'll add a little more to it. We want a little something to
-answer encores with, anyway."
-
-"What's onkores, Bilgewater?"
-
-The duke told him, and then says:
-
-"I'll answer by doing the Highland fling or the sailor's hornpipe; and
-you--well, let me see--oh, I've got it--you can do Hamlet's
-soliloquy."
-
-"Hamlet's which?"
-
-"Hamlet's soliloquy, you know; the most celebrated thing in
-Shakespeare. Ah, it's sublime, sublime! Always fetches the house. I
-haven't got it in the book--I've only got one volume--but I reckon I
-can piece it out from memory. I'll just walk up and down a minute, and
-see if I can call it back from recollection's vaults."
-
-So he went to marching up and down, thinking, and frowning horrible
-every now and then; then he would hoist up his eyebrows; next he would
-squeeze his hand on his forehead and stagger back and kind of moan;
-next he would sigh, and next he'd let on to drop a tear. It was
-beautiful to see him. By and by he got it. He told us to give
-attention. Then he strikes a most noble attitude, with one leg shoved
-forwards, and his arms stretched away up, and his head tilted back,
-looking up at the sky; and then he begins to rip and rave and grit his
-teeth; and after that, all through his speech, he howled, and spread
-around, and swelled up his chest, and just knocked the spots out of
-any acting ever _I_ see before. This is the speech--I learned it, easy
-enough, while he was learning it to the king:
-
-    To be, or not to be; that is the bare bodkin
-    That makes calamity of so long life;
-    For who would fardels bear, till Birnam Wood do come to
-        Dunsinane,
-    But that the fear of something after death
-    Murders the innocent sleep,
-    Great nature's second course,
-    And makes us rather sling the arrows of outrageous fortune
-    Than fly to others that we know not of.
-    There's the respect must give us pause:
-    Wake Duncan with thy knocking! I would thou couldst;
-    For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
-    The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
-    The law's delay, and the quietus which his pangs might take,
-    In the dead waste and middle of the night, when churchyards
-        yawn
-    In customary suits of solemn black,
-    But that the undiscovered country from whose bourne no
-        traveler returns,
-    Breathes forth contagion on the world,
-    And thus the native hue of resolution, like the poor cat i' the
-        adage,
-    Is sicklied o'er with care,
-    And all the clouds that lowered o'er our housetops,
-    With this regard their currents turn awry,
-    And lose the name of action.
-    'Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished. But soft you, the
-        fair Ophelia:
-    Ope not thy ponderous and marble jaws,
-    But get thee to a nunnery--go!
-
-Well, the old man he liked that speech, and he mighty soon got it so
-he could do it first rate. It seemed like he was just born for it; and
-when he had his hand in and was excited, it was perfectly lovely the
-way he would rip and tear and rair up behind when he was getting it
-off.
-
-The first chance we got the duke he had some show-bills printed; and
-after that, for two or three days as we floated along, the raft was a
-most uncommon lively place, for there warn't nothing but
-sword-fighting and rehearsing--as the duke called it--going on all the
-time. One morning, when we was pretty well down the state of Arkansaw,
-we come in sight of a little one-horse town in a big bend; so we tied
-up about three-quarters of a mile above it, in the mouth of a crick
-which was shut in like a tunnel by the cypress trees, and all of us
-but Jim took the canoe and went down there to see if there was any
-chance in that place for our show.
-
-We struck it mighty lucky; there was going to be a circus there that
-afternoon, and the country-people was already beginning to come in, in
-all kinds of old shackly wagons, and on horses. The circus would leave
-before night, so our show would have a pretty good chance. The duke he
-hired the court-house, and we went around and stuck up our bills. They
-read like this:
-
-
-   Shaksperean Revival ! ! !
-   Wonderful Attraction!
-   For One Night Only!
-   The world renowned tragedians,
-   David Garrick the younger, of Drury Lane Theatre, London,
-      and
-   Edmund Kean the elder, of the Royal Haymarket Theatre,
-   Whitechapel, Pudding Lane, Piccadilly, London, and the
-   Royal Continental Theatres, in their sublime
-   Shaksperean Spectacle entitled
-   The Balcony Scene
-      in
-   Romeo and Juliet ! ! !
-   Romeo...................Mr. Garrick
-   Juliet..................Mr. Kean
-   Assisted by the whole strength of the company!
-   New costumes, new scenery, new appointments!
-      Also:
-   The thrilling, masterly, and blood-curdling
-   Broad-sword conflict
-   In Richard III. ! ! !
-   Richard III.............Mr. Garrick
-   Richmond................Mr. Kean
-      Also:
-   (by special request)
-   Hamlet's Immortal Soliloquy ! !
-   By the Illustrious Kean!
-   Done by him 300 consecutive nights in Paris!
-   For One Night Only,
-   On account of imperative European engagements!
-   Admission 25 cents; children and servants, 10 cents.
-
-
-Then we went loafing around town. The stores and houses was most all
-old, shackly, dried-up frame concerns that hadn't ever been painted;
-they was set up three or four foot above ground on stilts, so as to be
-out of reach of the water when the river was overflowed. The houses
-had little gardens around them, but they didn't seem to raise hardly
-anything in them but jimpson-weeds, and sunflowers, and ash-piles, and
-old curled-up boots and shoes, and pieces of bottles, and rags, and
-played-out tinware. The fences was made of different kinds of boards,
-nailed on at different times; and they leaned every which way, and had
-gates that didn't generly have but one hinge--a leather one. Some of
-the fences had been whitewashed some time or another, but the duke
-said it was in Columbus's time, like enough. There was generly hogs in
-the garden, and people driving them out.
-
-All the stores was along one street. They had white domestic awnings
-in front, and the country-people hitched their horses to the
-awning-posts. There was empty dry-goods boxes under the awnings, and
-loafers roosting on them all day long, whittling them with their
-Barlow knives; and chawing tobacco, and gaping and yawning and
-stretching--a mighty ornery lot. They generly had on yellow straw hats
-most as wide as an umbrella, but didn't wear no coats nor waistcoats;
-they called one another Bill, and Buck, and Hank, and Joe, and Andy,
-and talked lazy and drawly, and used considerable many cuss-words.
-There was as many as one loafer leaning up against every awning-post,
-and he most always had his hands in his britches pockets, except when
-he fetched them out to lend a chaw of tobacco or scratch. What a body
-was hearing amongst them all the time was:
-
-"Gimme a chaw 'v tobacker, Hank."
-
-"Cain't; I hain't got but one chaw left. Ask Bill."
-
-Maybe Bill he gives him a chaw; maybe he lies and says he ain't got
-none. Some of them kinds of loafers never has a cent in the world, nor
-a chaw of tobacco of their own. They get all their chawing by
-borrowing; they say to a fellow, "I wisht you'd len' me a chaw, Jack,
-I jist this minute give Ben Thompson the last chaw I had"--which is a
-lie pretty much every time; it don't fool nobody but a stranger; but
-Jack ain't no stranger, so he says:
-
-"_You_ give him a chaw, did you? So did your sister's cat's
-grandmother. You pay me back the chaws you've awready borry'd off'n
-me, Lafe Buckner, then I'll loan you one or two ton of it, and won't
-charge you no back intrust, nuther."
-
-"Well, I _did_ pay you back some of it wunst."
-
-"Yes, you did--'bout six chaws. You borry'd store tobacker and paid
-back nigger-head."
-
-Store tobacco is flat black plug, but these fellows mostly chaws the
-natural leaf twisted. When they borrow a chaw they don't generly cut
-it off with a knife, but set the plug in between their teeth, and gnaw
-with their teeth and tug at the plug with their hands till they get it
-in two; then sometimes the one that owns the tobacco looks mournful at
-it when it's handed back, and says, sarcastic:
-
-"Here, gimme the _chaw_, and you take the _plug_."
-
-[Illustration:"'GIMME A CHAW'"]
-
-All the streets and lanes was just mud; they warn't nothing else _but_
-mud--mud as black as tar and nigh about a foot deep in some places,
-and two or three inches deep in _all_ the places. The hogs loafed and
-grunted around everywheres.  You'd see a muddy sow and a litter of
-pigs come lazying along the street and whollop herself right down in
-the way, where folks had to walk around her, and she'd stretch out and
-shut her eyes and wave her ears whilst the pigs was milking her, and
-look as happy as if she was on salary. And pretty soon you'd hear a
-loafer sing out, "Hi! _so_ boy! sick him, Tige!" and away the sow
-would go, squealing most horrible, with a dog or two swinging to each
-ear, and three or four dozen more a-coming; and then you would see all
-the loafers get up and watch the thing out of sight, and laugh at the
-fun and look grateful for the noise. Then they'd settle back again
-till there was a dog-fight. There couldn't anything wake them up all
-over, and make them happy all over, like a dog-fight--unless it might
-be putting turpentine on a stray dog and setting fire to him, or tying
-a tin pan to his tail and see him run himself to death.
-
-On the river-front some of the houses was sticking out over the bank,
-and they was bowed and bent, and about ready to tumble in. The people
-had moved out of them. The bank was caved away under one corner of
-some others, and that corner was hanging over. People lived in them
-yet, but it was dangersome, because sometimes a strip of land as wide
-as a house caves in at a time. Sometimes a belt of land a quarter of a
-mile deep will start in and cave along and cave along till it all
-caves into the river in one summer. Such a town as that has to be
-always moving back, and back, and back, because the river's always
-gnawing at it.
-
-The nearer it got to noon that day the thicker and thicker was the
-wagons and horses in the streets, and more coming all the time.
-Families fetched their dinners with them from the country, and eat
-them in the wagons. There was considerable whisky-drinking going on,
-and I seen three fights. By and by somebody sings out:
-
-"Here comes old Boggs!--in from the country for his little old monthly
-drunk; here he comes, boys!"
-
-All the loafers looked glad; I reckoned they was used to having fun
-out of Boggs. One of them says:
-
-"Wonder who he's a-gwyne to chaw up this time. If he'd a-chawed up all
-the men he's ben a-gwyne to chaw up in the last twenty year he'd have
-considerable ruputation now."
-
-Another one says, "I wisht old Boggs 'd threaten me, 'cuz then I'd
-know I warn't gwyne to die for a thousan' year."
-
-Boggs comes a-tearing along on his horse, whooping and yelling like an
-Injun, and singing out:
-
-"Cler the track, thar. I'm on the waw-path, and the price uv coffins
-is a-gwyne to raise."
-
-He was drunk, and weaving about in his saddle; he was over fifty year
-old, and had a very red face. Everybody yelled at him and laughed at
-him and sassed him, and he sassed back, and said he'd attend to them
-and lay them out in their regular turns, but he couldn't wait now
-because he'd come to town to kill old Colonel Sherburn, and his motto
-was, "Meat first, and spoon vittles to top off on."
-
-He see me, and rode up and says:
-
-"Whar'd you come f'm, boy? You prepared to die?"
-
-Then he rode on. I was scared, but a man says:
-
-"He don't mean nothing; he's always a-carryin' on like that when he's
-drunk. He's the best-naturedest old fool in Arkansaw--never hurt
-nobody, drunk nor sober."
-
-Boggs rode up before the biggest store in town, and bent his head down
-so he could see under the curtain of the awning and yells:
-
-"Come out here, Sherburn! Come out and meet the man you've swindled.
-You're the houn' I'm after, and I'm a-gwyne to have you, too!"
-
-And so he went on, calling Sherburn everything he could lay his tongue
-to, and the whole street packed with people listening and laughing and
-going on. By and by a proud-looking man about fifty-five--and he was a
-heap the best-dressed man in that town, too--steps out of the store,
-and the crowd drops back on each side to let him come. He says to
-Boggs, mighty ca'm and slow--he says:
-
-"I'm tired of this, but I'll endure it till one o'clock. Till one
-o'clock, mind--no longer. If you open your mouth against me only once
-after that time you can't travel so far but I will find you."
-
-Then he turns and goes in. The crowd looked mighty sober; nobody
-stirred, and there warn't no more laughing. Boggs rode off
-blackguarding Sherburn as loud as he could yell, all down the street;
-and pretty soon back he comes and stops before the store, still
-keeping it up. Some men crowded around him and tried to get him to
-shut up, but he wouldn't; they told him it would be one o'clock in
-about fifteen minutes, and so he _must_ go home--he must go right
-away. But it didn't do no good. He cussed away with all his might, and
-throwed his hat down in the mud and rode over it, and pretty soon away
-he went a-raging down the street again, with his gray hair a-flying.
-Everybody that could get a chance at him tried their best to coax him
-off of his horse so they could lock him up and get him sober; but it
-warn't no use--up the street he would tear again, and give Sherburn
-another cussing. By and by somebody says:
-
-"Go for his daughter!--quick, go for his daughter; sometimes he'll
-listen to her. If anybody can persuade him, she can."
-
-So somebody started on a run. I walked down street a ways and stopped.
-In about five or ten minutes here comes Boggs again, but not on his
-horse. He was a-reeling across the street towards me, bareheaded, with
-a friend on both sides of him a-holt of his arms and hurrying him
-along. He was quiet, and looked uneasy; and he warn't hanging back
-any, but was doing some of the hurrying himself. Somebody sings out:
-
-"Boggs!"
-
-I looked over there to see who said it, and it was that Colonel
-Sherburn. He was standing perfectly still in the street, and had a
-pistol raised in his right hand--not aiming it, but holding it out
-with the barrel tilted up towards the sky. The same second I see a
-young girl coming on the run, and two men with her. Boggs and the men
-turned round to see who called him, and when they see the pistol the
-men jumped to one side, and the pistol-barrel come down slow and
-steady to a level--both barrels cocked. Boggs throws up both of his
-hands and says, "O Lord, don't shoot!" Bang! goes the first shot, and
-he staggers back, clawing at the air--bang! goes the second one, and
-he tumbles backwards onto the ground, heavy and solid, with his arms
-spread out. That young girl screamed out and comes rushing, and down
-she throws herself on her father, crying, and saying, "Oh, he's killed
-him, he's killed him!" The crowd closed up around them, and shouldered
-and jammed one another, with their necks stretched, trying to see, and
-people on the inside trying to shove them back and shouting, "Back,
-back! give him air, give him air!"
-
-Colonel Sherburn he tossed his pistol onto the ground, and turned
-around on his heels and walked off.
-
-They took Boggs to a little drug store, the crowd pressing around just
-the same, and the whole town following, and I rushed and got a good
-place at the window, where I was close to him and could see in. They
-laid him on the floor and put one large Bible under his head, and
-opened another one and spread it on his breast; but they tore open his
-shirt first, and I seen where one of the bullets went in. He made
-about a dozen long gasps, his breast lifting the Bible up when he
-drawed in his breath, and letting it down again when he breathed it
-out--and after that he laid still; he was dead. Then they pulled his
-daughter away from him, screaming and crying, and took her off. She
-was about sixteen, and very sweet and gentle looking, but awful pale
-and scared.
-
-Well, pretty soon the whole town was there, squirming and scrouging
-and pushing and shoving to get at the window and have a look, but
-people that had the places wouldn't give them up, and folks behind
-them was saying all the time, "Say, now, you've looked enough, you
-fellows; 'tain't right and 'tain't fair for you to stay thar all the
-time, and never give nobody a chance; other folks has their rights as
-well as you."
-
-There was considerable jawing back, so I slid out, thinking maybe
-there was going to be trouble. The streets was full, and everybody was
-excited. Everybody that seen the shooting was telling how it happened,
-and there was a big crowd packed around each one of these fellows,
-stretching their necks and listening. One long, lanky man, with long
-hair and a big white fur stovepipe hat on the back of his head, and a
-crooked-handled cane, marked out the places on the ground where Boggs
-stood and where Sherburn stood, and the people following him around
-from one place to t'other and watching everything he done, and bobbing
-their heads to show they understood, and stooping a little and resting
-their hands on their thighs to watch him mark the places on the ground
-with his cane; and then he stood up straight and stiff where Sherburn
-had stood, frowning and having his hat-brim down over his eyes, and
-sung out, "Boggs!" and then fetched his cane down slow to a level, and
-says "Bang!" staggered backwards, says "Bang!" again, and fell down
-flat on his back. The people that had seen the thing said he done it
-perfect; said it was just exactly the way it all happened. Then as
-much as a dozen people got out their bottles and treated him.
-
-Well, by and by somebody said Sherburn ought to be lynched. In about a
-minute everybody was saying it; so away they went, mad and yelling,
-and snatching down every clothes-line they come to to do the hanging
-with.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXII
-
-
-They swarmed up towards Sherburn's house, a-whooping and raging like
-Injuns, and everything had to clear the way or get run over and
-tromped to mush, and it was awful to see. Children was heeling it
-ahead of the mob, screaming and trying to get out of the way; and
-every window along the road was full of women's heads, and there was
-nigger boys in every tree, and bucks and wenches looking over every
-fence; and as soon as the mob would get nearly to them they would
-break and skaddle back out of reach. Lots of the women and girls was
-crying and taking on, scared most to death.
-
-They swarmed up in front of Sherburn's palings as thick as they could
-jam together, and you couldn't hear yourself think for the noise. It
-was a little twenty-foot yard. Some sung out "Tear down the fence!
-tear down the fence!" Then there was a racket of ripping and tearing
-and smashing, and down she goes, and the front wall of the crowd
-begins to roll in like a wave.
-
-Just then Sherburn steps out onto the roof of his little front porch,
-with a double-barrel gun in his hand, and takes his stand, perfectly
-ca'm and deliberate, not saying a word. The racket stopped, and the
-wave sucked back.
-
-Sherburn never said a word--just stood there, looking down. The
-stillness was awful creepy and uncomfortable. Sherburn run his eye
-slow along the crowd; and wherever it struck the people tried a little
-to outgaze him, but they couldn't; they dropped their eyes and looked
-sneaky. Then pretty soon Sherburn sort of laughed; not the pleasant
-kind, but the kind that makes you feel like when you are eating bread
-that's got sand in it.
-
-Then he says, slow and scornful:
-
-"The idea of _you_ lynching anybody! It's amusing. The idea of you
-thinking you had pluck enough to lynch a _man!_ Because you're brave
-enough to tar and feather poor friendless cast-out women that come
-along here, did that make you think you had grit enough to lay your
-hands on a _man?_ Why, a _man's_ safe in the hands of ten thousand of
-your kind--as long as it's daytime and you're not behind him.
-
-"Do I know you? I know you clear through. I was born and raised in the
-South, and I've lived in the North; so I know the average all around.
-The average man's a coward. In the North he lets anybody walk over him
-that wants to, and goes home and prays for a humble spirit to bear it.
-In the South one man, all by himself, has stopped a stage full of men
-in the daytime, and robbed the lot. Your newspapers call you a brave
-people so much that you think you are braver than any other
-people--whereas you're just _as_ brave, and no braver. Why don't your
-juries hang murderers? Because they're afraid the man's friends will
-shoot them in the back, in the dark--and it's just what they _would_
-do.
-
-"So they always acquit; and then a _man_ goes in the night, with a
-hundred masked cowards at his back, and lynches the rascal. Your
-mistake is, that you didn't bring a man with you; that's one mistake,
-and the other is that you didn't come in the dark and fetch your
-masks. You brought _part_ of a man--Buck Harkness, there--and if you
-hadn't had him to start you, you'd 'a' taken it out in blowing.
-
-"You didn't want to come. The average man don't like trouble and
-danger. _You_ don't like trouble and danger. But if only _half_ a
-man--like Buck Harkness, there--shouts 'Lynch him! lynch him!' you're
-afraid to back down--afraid you'll be found out to be what you
-are--_cowards_--and so you raise a yell, and hang yourselves onto that
-half-a-man's coat-tail, and come raging up here, swearing what big
-things you're going to do. The pitifulest thing out is a mob; that's
-what an army is--a mob; they don't fight with courage that's born in
-them, but with courage that's borrowed from their mass, and from their
-officers. But a mob without any _man_ at the head of it is _beneath_
-pitifulness. Now the thing for _you_ to do is to droop your tails and
-go home and crawl in a hole. If any real lynching's going to be done
-it will be done in the dark, Southern fashion; and when they come
-they'll bring their masks, and fetch a _man_ along. Now _leave_--and
-take your half-a-man with you"--tossing his gun up across his left arm
-and cocking it when he says this.
-
-The crowd washed back sudden, and then broke all apart, and went
-tearing off every which way, and Buck Harkness he heeled it after
-them, looking tolerable cheap. I could 'a' stayed if I wanted to, but
-I didn't want to.
-
-I went to the circus and loafed around the back side till the watchman
-went by, and then dived in under the tent. I had my twenty-dollar gold
-piece and some other money, but I reckoned I better save it, because
-there ain't no telling how soon you are going to need it, away from
-home and amongst strangers that way. You can't be too careful. I ain't
-opposed to spending money on circuses when there ain't no other way,
-but there ain't no use in _wasting_ it on them.
-
-It was a real bully circus. It was the splendidest sight that ever was
-when they all come riding in, two and two, and gentleman and lady,
-side by side, the men just in their drawers and undershirts, and no
-shoes nor stirrups, and resting their hands on their thighs easy and
-comfortable--there must 'a' been twenty of them--and every lady with a
-lovely complexion, and perfectly beautiful, and looking just like a
-gang of real sure-enough queens, and dressed in clothes that cost
-millions of dollars, and just littered with diamonds. It was a
-powerful fine sight; I never see anything so lovely. And then one by
-one they got up and stood, and went a-weaving around the ring so
-gentle and wavy and graceful, the men looking ever so tall and airy
-and straight, with their heads bobbing and skimming along, away up
-there under the tent-roof, and every lady's rose-leafy dress flapping
-soft and silky around her hips, and she looking like the most
-loveliest parasol.
-
-And then faster and faster they went, all of them dancing, first one
-foot out in the air and then the other, the horses leaning more and
-more, and the ringmaster going round and round the center pole,
-cracking his whip and shouting "Hi!--hi!" and the clown cracking jokes
-behind him; and by and by all hands dropped the reins, and every lady
-put her knuckles on her hips and every gentleman folded his arms, and
-then how the horses did lean over and hump themselves! And so one
-after the other they all skipped off into the ring, and made the
-sweetest bow I ever see, and then scampered out, and everybody clapped
-their hands and went just about wild. Well, all through the circus
-they done the most astonishing things; and all the time that clown
-carried on so it most killed the people. The ringmaster couldn't ever
-say a word to him but he was back at him quick as a wink with the
-funniest things a body ever said; and how he ever _could_ think of so
-many of them, and so sudden and so pat, was what I couldn't no way
-understand. Why, I couldn't 'a' thought of them in a year. And by and
-by a drunken man tried to get into the ring--said he wanted to ride;
-said he could ride as well as anybody that ever was. They argued and
-tried to keep him out, but he wouldn't listen, and the whole show come
-to a standstill. Then the people begun to holler at him and make fun
-of him, and that made him mad, and he begun to rip and tear; so that
-stirred up the people, and a lot of men begun to pile down off of the
-benches and swarm toward the ring, saying, "Knock him down! throw him
-out!" and one or two women begun to scream. So, then, the ringmaster
-he made a little speech, and said he hoped there wouldn't be no
-disturbance, and if the man would promise he wouldn't make no more
-trouble he would let him ride if he thought he could stay on the
-horse. So everybody laughed and said all right, and the man got on.
-The minute he was on, the horse begun to rip and tear and jump and
-cavort around, with two circus men hanging on to his bridle trying to
-hold him, and the drunk man hanging on to his neck, and his heels
-flying in the air every jump, and the whole crowd of people standing
-up shouting and laughing till tears rolled down. And at last, sure
-enough, all the circus men could do, the horse broke loose, and away
-he went like the very nation, round and round the ring, with that sot
-laying down on him and hanging to his neck, with first one leg hanging
-most to the ground on one side, and then t'other one on t'other side,
-and the people just crazy. It warn't funny to me, though; I was all of
-a tremble to see his danger. But pretty soon he struggled up astraddle
-and grabbed the bridle, a-reeling this way and that; and the next
-minute he sprung up and dropped the bridle and stood! and the horse
-a-going like a house afire, too. He just stood up there, a-sailing
-around as easy and comfortable as if he warn't ever drunk in his
-life--and then he begun to pull off his clothes and sling them. He
-shed them so thick they kind of clogged up the air, and altogether he
-shed seventeen suits. And, then, there he was, slim and handsome, and
-dressed the gaudiest and prettiest you ever saw, and he lit into that
-horse with his whip and made him fairly hum--and finally skipped off,
-and made his bow and danced off to the dressing-room, and everybody
-just a-howling with pleasure and astonishment.
-
-Then the ringmaster he see how he had been fooled, and he _was_ the
-sickest ringmaster you ever see, I reckon. Why, it was one of his own
-men! He had got up that joke all out of his own head, and never let on
-to nobody. Well, I felt sheepish enough to be took in so, but I
-wouldn't 'a' been in that ringmaster's place, not for a thousand
-dollars. I don't know; there may be bullier circuses than what that
-one was, but I never struck them yet. Anyways, it was plenty good
-enough for _me_; and wherever I run across it, it can have all of _my_
-custom every time.
-
-Well, that night we had _our_ show; but there warn't only about twelve
-people there--just enough to pay expenses. And they laughed all the
-time, and that made the duke mad; and everybody left, anyway, before
-the show was over, but one boy which was asleep. So the duke said
-these Arkansaw lunkheads couldn't come up to Shakespeare; what they
-wanted was low comedy--and maybe something ruther worse than low
-comedy, he reckoned. He said he could size their style. So next
-morning he got some big sheets of wrapping-paper and some black paint,
-and drawed off some handbills, and stuck them up all over the village.
-The bills said:
-
-
-   AT THE COURT HOUSE!
-   FOR 3 NIGHTS ONLY!
-   _The World-Renowned Tragedians_
-   DAVID GARRICK THE YOUNGER!
-      AND
-   EDMUND KEAN THE ELDER!
-   Of the London and Continental
-   Theatres,
-   In their Thrilling Tragedy of
-   THE KING'S CAMELEOPARD,
-      OR
-   THE ROYAL NONESUCH ! ! !
-   _Admission 50 cents._
-
-Then at the bottom was the biggest line of all, which said:
-
-   LADIES AND CHILDREN NOT ADMITTED
-
-"There," says he, "if that line don't fetch them, I don't know
-Arkansaw!"
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXIII
-I
-
-
-Well, all day him and the king was hard at it, rigging up a stage and
-a curtain and a row of candles for footlights; and that night the
-house was jam full of men in no time. When the place couldn't hold no
-more, the duke he quit tending door and went around the back way and
-come onto the stage and stood up before the curtain and made a little
-speech, and praised up this tragedy, and said it was the most
-thrillingest one that ever was; and so he went on a-bragging about the
-tragedy, and about Edmund Kean the Elder, which was to play the main
-principal part in it; and at last when he'd got everybody's
-expectations up high enough, he rolled up the curtain, and the next
-minute the king come a-prancing out on all fours, naked; and he was
-painted all over, ring-streaked-and-striped, all sorts of colors, as
-splendid as a rainbow. And--but never mind the rest of his outfit; it
-was just wild, but it was awful funny. The people most killed
-themselves laughing; and when the king got done capering and capered
-off behind the scenes, they roared and clapped and stormed and
-haw-hawed till he come back and done it over again, and after that
-they made him do it another time. Well, it would make a cow laugh to
-see the shines that old idiot cut.
-
-Then the duke he lets the curtain down, and bows to the people, and
-says the great tragedy will be performed only two nights more, on
-accounts of pressing London engagements, where the seats is all sold
-already for it in Drury Lane; and then he makes them another bow, and
-says if he has succeeded in pleasing them and instructing them, he
-will be deeply obleeged if they will mention it to their friends and
-get them to come and see it.
-
-Twenty people sings out:
-
-"What, is it over?  Is that _all_?"
-
-The duke says yes. Then there was a fine time. Everybody sings out,
-"Sold!" and rose up mad, and was a-going for that stage and them
-tragedians. But a big, fine-looking man jumps up on a bench and
-shouts:
-
-"Hold on! Just a word, gentlemen." They stopped to listen. "We are
-sold--mighty badly sold. But we don't want to be the laughing-stock of
-this whole town, I reckon, and never hear the last of this thing as
-long as we live. _No_. What we want is to go out of here quiet, and
-talk this show up, and sell the _rest_ of the town! Then we'll all be
-in the same boat. Ain't that sensible?" ("You bet it is!--the jedge is
-right!" everybody sings out.) "All right, then--not a word about any
-sell. Go along home, and advise everybody to come and see the
-tragedy."
-
-Next day you couldn't hear nothing around that town but how splendid
-that show was. House was jammed again that night, and we sold this
-crowd the same way. When me and the king and the duke got home to the
-raft we all had a supper; and by and by, about midnight, they made Jim
-and me back her out and float her down the middle of the river, and
-fetch her in and hide her about two mile below town.
-
-The third night the house was crammed again--and they warn't
-new-comers this time, but people that was at the show the other two
-nights. I stood by the duke at the door, and I see that every man that
-went in had his pockets bulging, or something muffled up under his
-coat--and I see it warn't no perfumery, neither, not by a long sight.
-I smelt sickly eggs by the barrel, and rotten cabbages, and such
-things; and if I know the signs of a dead cat being around, and I bet
-I do, there was sixty-four of them went in. I shoved in there for a
-minute, but it was too various for me; I couldn't stand it. Well, when
-the place couldn't hold no more people the duke he give a fellow a
-quarter and told him to tend door for him a minute, and then he
-started around for the stage door, I after him; but the minute we
-turned the corner and was in the dark he says:
-
-"Walk fast now till you get away from the houses, and then shin for
-the raft like the dickens was after you!"
-
-I done it, and he done the same. We struck the raft at the same time,
-and in less than two seconds we was gliding down-stream, all dark and
-still, and edging towards the middle of the river, nobody saying a
-word. I reckoned the poor king was in for a gaudy time of it with the
-audience, but nothing of the sort; pretty soon he crawls out from
-under the wigwam, and says:
-
-"Well, how'd the old thing pan out this time, duke?" He hadn't been
-up-town at all.
-
-We never showed a light till we was about ten mile below the village.
-Then we lit up and had a supper, and the king and the duke fairly
-laughed their bones loose over the way they'd served them people. The
-duke says:
-
-"Greenhorns, flatheads! I knew the first house would keep mum and let
-the rest of the town get roped in; and I knew they'd lay for us the
-third night, and consider it was _their_ turn now. Well, it _is_ their
-turn, and I'd give something to know how much they'd take for it. I
-_would_ just like to know how they're putting in their opportunity.
-They can turn it into a picnic if they want to--they brought plenty
-provisions."
-
-Them rapscallions took in four hundred and sixty-five dollars in that
-three nights. I never see money hauled in by the wagon-load like that
-before.
-
-By and by, when they was asleep and snoring, Jim says:
-
-"Don't it s'prise you de way dem kings carries on, Huck?"
-
-"No," I says, "it don't."
-
-"Why don't it, Huck?"
-
-"Well, it don't, because it's in the breed. I reckon they're all
-alike."
-
-"But, Huck, dese kings o' ourn is reglar rapscallions; dat's jist what
-dey is; dey's reglar rapscallions."
-
-"Well, that's what I'm a-saying; all kings is mostly rapscallions, as
-fur as I can make out."
-
-"Is dat so?"
-
-"You read about them once--you'll see. Look at Henry the Eight; this
-'n' 's a Sunday-school Superintendent to _him_. And look at Charles
-Second, and Louis Fourteen, and Louis Fifteen, and James Second, and
-Edward Second, and Richard Third, and forty more; besides all them
-Saxon heptarchies that used to rip around so in old times and raise
-Cain. My, you ought to seen old Henry the Eight when he was in bloom.
-He _was_ a blossom. He used to marry a new wife every day, and chop
-off her head next morning. And he would do it just as indifferent as
-if he was ordering up eggs. 'Fetch up Nell Gwynn,' he says. They fetch
-her up. Next morning, 'Chop off her head!' And they chop it off.
-'Fetch up Jane Shore,' he says; and up she comes. Next morning, 'Chop
-off her head'--and they chop it off. 'Ring up Fair Rosamun.' Fair
-Rosamun answers the bell. Next morning, 'Chop off her head.' And he
-made every one of them tell him a tale every night; and he kept that
-up till he had hogged a thousand and one tales that way, and then he
-put them all in a book, and called it Domesday Book--which was a good
-name and stated the case. You don't know kings, Jim, but I know them;
-and this old rip of ourn is one of the cleanest I've struck in
-history. Well, Henry he takes a notion he wants to get up some trouble
-with this country. How does he go at it--give notice?--give the
-country a show? No. All of a sudden he heaves all the tea in Boston
-Harbor overboard, and whacks out a declaration of independence, and
-dares them to come on. That was _his_ style--he never give anybody a
-chance. He had suspicions of his father, the Duke of Wellington. Well,
-what did he do?  Ask him to show up?  No--drownded him in a butt of
-mamsey, like a cat. S'pose people left money laying around where he
-was--what did he do? He collared it. S'pose he contracted to do a
-thing, and you paid him, and didn't set down there and see that he
-done it--what did he do? He always done the other thing. S'pose he
-opened his mouth--what then? If he didn't shut it up powerful quick
-he'd lose a lie every time. That's the kind of a bug Henry was; and if
-we'd 'a' had him along 'stead of our kings he'd 'a' fooled that town a
-heap worse than ourn done. I don't say that ourn is lambs, because
-they ain't, when you come right down to the cold facts; but they ain't
-nothing to _that_ old ram, anyway. All I say is, kings is kings, and
-you got to make allowances. Take them all around, they're a mighty
-ornery lot. It's the way they're raised."
-
-"But dis one do _smell_ so like de nation, Huck."
-
-"Well, they all do, Jim. We can't help the way a king smells; history
-don't tell no way."
-
-"Now de duke, he's a tolerble likely man in some ways."
-
-"Yes, a duke's different. But not very different. This one's a
-middling hard lot for a duke. When he's drunk there ain't no
-near-sighted man could tell him from a king."
-
-"Well, anyways, I doan' hanker for no mo' un um, Huck. Dese is all I
-kin stan'."
-
-"It's the way I feel, too, Jim. But we've got them on our hands, and
-we got to remember what they are, and make allowances. Sometimes I
-wish we could hear of a country that's out of kings."
-
-What was the use to tell Jim these warn't real kings and dukes?  It
-wouldn't 'a' done no good; and, besides, it was just as I said: you
-couldn't tell them from the real kind.
-
-I went to sleep, and Jim didn't call me when it was my turn. He often
-done that. When I waked up just at daybreak he was sitting there with
-his head down betwixt his knees, moaning and mourning to himself. I
-didn't take notice nor let on. I knowed what it was about. He was
-thinking about his wife and his children, away up yonder, and he was
-low and homesick; because he hadn't ever been away from home before in
-his life; and I do believe he cared just as much for his people as
-white folks does for their'n. It don't seem natural, but I reckon it's
-so. He was often moaning and mourning that way nights, when he judged
-I was asleep, and saying, "Po' little 'Lizabeth! po' little Johnny!
-it's mighty hard; I spec' I ain't ever gwyne to see you no mo', no
-mo'!" He was a mighty good nigger, Jim was.
-
-But this time I somehow got to talking to him about his wife and young
-ones; and by and by he says:
-
-"What makes me feel so bad dis time 'uz bekase I hear sumpn over
-yonder on de bank like a whack, er a slam, while ago, en it mine me er
-de time I treat my little 'Lizabeth so ornery. She warn't on'y 'bout
-fo' year ole, en she tuck de sk'yarlet fever, en had a powful rough
-spell; but she got well, en one day she was a-stannin' aroun', en I
-says to her, I says:
-
-"'Shet de do'.'
-
-"She never done it; jis' stood dah, kiner smilin' up at me. It make me
-mad; en I says ag'in, mighty loud, I says:
-
-"'Doan' you hear me? Shet de do'!"
-
-"She jis stood de same way, kiner smilin' up. I was a-bilin'! I says:
-
-"'I lay I _make_ you mine!'
-
-"En wid dat I fetch' her a slap side de head dat sont her a-sprawlin'.
-Den I went into de yuther room, en 'uz gone 'bout ten minutes; en when
-I come back dah was dat do' a-stannin' open _yit_, en dat chile
-stannin' mos' right in it, a-lookin' down and mournin', en de tears
-runnin' down. My, but I _wuz_ mad! I was a-gwyne for de chile, but
-jis' den--it was a do' dat open innerds--jis' den, 'long come de wind
-en slam it to, behine de chile, ker-_blam!_--en my lan', de chile
-never move'! My breff mos' hop outer me; en I feel so--so--I doan'
-know _how_ I feel. I crope out, all a-tremblin', en crope aroun' en
-open de do' easy en slow, en poke my head in behine de chile, sof' en
-still, en all uv a sudden I says _pow!_ jis' as loud as I could yell.
-She _never budge!_ Oh, Huck, I bust out a-cryin' en grab her up in my
-arms, en say, 'Oh, de po' little thing! De Lord God Amighty fogive po'
-ole Jim, kaze he never gwyne to fogive hisself as long's he live!' Oh,
-she was plumb deef en dumb, Huck, plumb deef en dumb--en I'd ben
-a-treat'n her so!"
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXIV
-
-
-Next day, towards night, we laid up under a little willow towhead out
-in the middle, where there was a village on each side of the river,
-and the duke and the king begun to lay out a plan for working them
-towns. Jim he spoke to the duke, and said he hoped it wouldn't take
-but a few hours, because it got mighty heavy and tiresome to him when
-he had to lay all day in the wigwam tied with the rope. You see, when
-we left him all alone we had to tie him, because if anybody happened
-on to him all by himself and not tied it wouldn't look much like he
-was a runaway nigger, you know. So the duke said it _was_ kind of hard
-to have to lay roped all day, and he'd cipher out some way to get
-around it.
-
-He was uncommon bright, the duke was, and he soon struck it. He
-dressed Jim up in King Lear's outfit--it was a long curtain-calico
-gown, and a white horse-hair wig and whiskers; and then he took his
-theater paint and painted Jim's face and hands and ears and neck all
-over a dead, dull solid blue, like a man that's been drownded nine
-days. Blamed if he warn't the horriblest-looking outrage I ever see.
-Then the duke took and wrote out a sign on a shingle so:
-
-_Sick Arab--but harmless when not out of his head._
-
-And he nailed that shingle to a lath, and stood the lath up four or
-five foot in front of the wigwam. Jim was satisfied. He said it was a
-sight better than lying tied a couple of years every day, and
-trembling all over every time there was a sound. The duke told him to
-make himself free and easy, and if anybody ever come meddling around,
-he must hop out of the wigwam, and carry on a little, and fetch a howl
-or two like a wild beast, and he reckoned they would light out and
-leave him alone. Which was sound enough judgment; but you take the
-average man, and he wouldn't wait for him to howl. Why, he didn't only
-look like he was dead, he looked considerable more than that.
-
-These rapscallions wanted to try the Nonesuch again, because there was
-so much money in it, but they judged it wouldn't be safe, because
-maybe the news might 'a' worked along down by this time. They couldn't
-hit no project that suited exactly; so at last the duke said he
-reckoned he'd lay off and work his brains an hour or two and see if he
-couldn't put up something on the Arkansaw village; and the king he
-allowed he would drop over to t'other village without any plan, but
-just trust in Providence to lead him the profitable way--meaning the
-devil, I reckon. We had all bought store clothes where we stopped
-last; and now the king put his'n on, and he told me to put mine on. I
-done it, of course. The king's duds was all black, and he did look
-real swell and starchy. I never knowed how clothes could change a body
-before. Why, before, he looked like the orneriest old rip that ever
-was; but now, when he'd take off his new white beaver and make a bow
-and do a smile, he looked that grand and good and pious that you'd say
-he had walked right out of the ark, and maybe was old Leviticus
-himself. Jim cleaned up the canoe, and I got my paddle ready. There
-was a big steamboat laying at the shore away up under the point, about
-three mile above the town--been there a couple of hours, taking on
-freight. Says the king:
-
-"Seein' how I'm dressed, I reckon maybe I better arrive down from St.
-Louis or Cincinnati, or some other big place. Go for the steamboat,
-Huckleberry; we'll come down to the village on her."
-
-I didn't have to be ordered twice to go and take a steamboat ride. I
-fetched the shore a half a mile above the village, and then went
-scooting along the bluff bank in the easy water. Pretty soon we come
-to a nice innocent-looking young country jake setting on a log
-swabbing the sweat off of his face, for it was powerful warm weather;
-and he had a couple of big carpet-bags by him.
-
-"Run her nose inshore," says the king. I done it. "Wher' you bound
-for, young man?"
-
-"For the steamboat; going to Orleans."
-
-"Git aboard," says the king. "Hold on a minute, my servant 'll
-he'p you with them bags. Jump out and he'p the gentleman,
-Adolphus"--meaning me, I see.
-
-I done so, and then we all three started on again. The young chap was
-mighty thankful; said it was tough work toting his baggage such
-weather. He asked the king where he was going, and the king told him
-he'd come down the river and landed at the other village this morning,
-and now he was going up a few mile to see an old friend on a farm up
-there. The young fellow says:
-
-"When I first see you I says to myself, 'It's Mr. Wilks, sure, and he
-come mighty near getting here in time.' But then I says again, 'No, I
-reckon it ain't him, or else he wouldn't be paddling up the river.'
-You _ain't_ him, are you?"
-
-"No, my name's Blodgett--Elexander Blodgett--_Reverend_ Elexander
-Blodgett, I s'pose I must say, as I'm one o' the Lord's poor servants.
-But still I'm jist as able to be sorry for Mr. Wilks for not arriving
-in time, all the same, if he's missed anything by it--which I hope he
-hasn't."
-
-"Well, he don't miss any property by it, because he'll get that all
-right; but he's missed seeing his brother Peter die--which he mayn't
-mind, nobody can tell as to that--but his brother would 'a' give
-anything in this world to see _him_ before he died; never talked about
-nothing else all these three weeks; hadn't seen him since they was
-boys together--and hadn't ever seen his brother William at all--that's
-the deef and dumb one--William ain't more than thirty or thirty-five.
-Peter and George were the only ones that come out here; George was the
-married brother; him and his wife both died last year. Harvey and
-William's the only ones that's left now; and, as I was saying, they
-haven't got here in time."
-
-"Did anybody send 'em word?"
-
-"Oh, yes; a month or two ago, when Peter was first took; because Peter
-said then that he sorter felt like he warn't going to get well this
-time. You see, he was pretty old, and George's g'yirls was too young
-to be much company for him, except Mary Jane, the red-headed one; and
-so he was kinder lonesome after George and his wife died, and didn't
-seem to care much to live. He most desperately wanted to see
-Harvey--and William, too, for that matter--because he was one of them
-kind that can't bear to make a will. He left a letter behind for
-Harvey, and said he'd told in it where his money was hid, and how he
-wanted the rest of the property divided up so George's g'yirls would
-be all right--for George didn't leave nothing. And that letter was all
-they could get him to put a pen to."
-
-"Why do you reckon Harvey don't come? Wher' does he live?"
-
-"Oh, he lives in England--Sheffield--preaches there--hasn't ever been
-in this country. He hasn't had any too much time--and besides he
-mightn't 'a' got the letter at all, you know."
-
-"Too bad, too bad he couldn't 'a' lived to see his brothers, poor
-soul. You going to Orleans, you say?"
-
-"Yes, but that ain't only a part of it. I'm going in a ship, next
-Wednesday, for Ryo Janeero, where my uncle lives."
-
-"It's a pretty long journey. But it'll be lovely; I wisht I was
-a-going. Is Mary Jane the oldest?  How old is the others?"
-
-"Mary Jane's nineteen, Susan's fifteen, and Joanna's about
-fourteen--that's the one that gives herself to good works and has a
-hare-lip."
-
-"Poor things! to be left alone in the cold world so."
-
-"Well, they could be worse off. Old Peter had friends, and they ain't
-going to let them come to no harm. There's Hobson, the Babtis'
-preacher; and Deacon Lot Hovey, and Ben Rucker, and Abner Shackleford,
-and Levi Bell, the lawyer; and Dr. Robinson, and their wives, and the
-widow Bartley, and--well, there's a lot of them; but these are the
-ones that Peter was thickest with, and used to write about sometimes,
-when he wrote home; so Harvey 'll know where to look for friends when
-he gets here."
-
-Well, the old man went on asking questions till he just fairly emptied
-that young fellow. Blamed if he didn't inquire about everybody and
-everything in that blessed town, and all about the Wilkses; and about
-Peter's business--which was a tanner; and about George's--which was a
-carpenter; and about Harvey's--which was a dissentering minister; and
-so on, and so on. Then he says:
-
-"What did you want to walk all the way up to the steamboat for?"
-
-"Because she's a big Orleans boat, and I was afeard she mightn't stop
-there. When they're deep they won't stop for a hail. A Cincinnati boat
-will, but this is a St. Louis one."
-
-"Was Peter Wilks well off?"
-
-"Oh, yes, pretty well off. He had houses and land, and it's reckoned
-he left three or four thousand in cash hid up som'ers."
-
-"When did you say he died?"
-
-"I didn't say, but it was last night."
-
-"Funeral to-morrow, likely?"
-
-"Yes, 'bout the middle of the day."
-
-"Well, it's all terrible sad; but we've all got to go, one time or
-another. So what we want to do is to be prepared; then we're all
-right."
-
-"Yes, sir, it's the best way. Ma used to always say that."
-
-When we struck the boat she was about done loading, and pretty soon
-she got off. The king never said nothing about going aboard, so I lost
-my ride, after all. When the boat was gone the king made me paddle up
-another mile to a lonesome place, and then he got ashore and says:
-
-"Now hustle back, right off, and fetch the duke up here, and the new
-carpet-bags. And if he's gone over to t'other side, go over there and
-git him. And tell him to git himself up regardless. Shove along, now."
-
-I see what _he_ was up to; but I never said nothing, of course. When I
-got back with the duke we hid the canoe, and then they set down on a
-log, and the king told him everything, just like the young fellow had
-said it--every last word of it. And all the time he was a-doing it he
-tried to talk like an Englishman; and he done it pretty well, too, for
-a slouch. I can't imitate him, and so I ain't a-going to try to; but
-he really done it pretty good. Then he says:
-
-"How are you on the deef and dumb, Bilgewater?"
-
-The duke said, leave him alone for that; said he had played a deef and
-dumb person on the histrionic boards. So then they waited for a
-steamboat.
-
-About the middle of the afternoon a couple of little boats come along,
-but they didn't come from high enough up the river; but at last there
-was a big one, and they hailed her. She sent out her yawl, and we went
-aboard, and she was from Cincinnati; and when they found we only
-wanted to go four or five mile they was booming mad, and gave us a
-cussing, and said they wouldn't land us. But the king was ca'm. He
-says:
-
-"If gentlemen kin afford to pay a dollar a mile apiece to be took on
-and put off in a yawl, a steamboat kin afford to carry 'em, can't it?"
-
-So they softened down and said it was all right; and when we got to
-the village they yawled us ashore. About two dozen men flocked down
-when they see the yawl a-coming, and when the king says:
-
-"Kin any of you gentlemen tell me wher' Mr. Peter Wilks lives?" they
-give a glance at one another, and nodded their heads, as much as to
-say, "What 'd I tell you?" Then one of them says, kind of soft and
-gentle:
-
-"I'm sorry, sir, but the best we can do is to tell you where he _did_
-live yesterday evening."
-
-Sudden as winking the ornery old cretur went all to smash, and fell up
-against the man, and put his chin on his shoulder, and cried down his
-back, and says:
-
-"Alas, alas, our poor brother--gone, and we never got to see him; oh,
-it's too, too hard!"
-
-Then he turns around, blubbering, and makes a lot of idiotic signs to
-the duke on his hands, and blamed if he didn't drop a carpet-bag and
-bust out a-crying. If they warn't the beatenest lot, them two frauds,
-that ever I struck.
-
-Well, the men gathered around and sympathized with them, and said all
-sorts of kind things to them, and carried their carpet-bags up the
-hill for them, and let them lean on them and cry, and told the king
-all about his brother's last moments, and the king he told it all over
-again on his hands to the duke, and both of them took on about that
-dead tanner like they'd lost the twelve disciples. Well, if ever I
-struck anything like it, I'm a nigger. It was enough to make a body
-ashamed of the human race.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXV
-
-
-The news was all over town in two minutes, and you could see the
-people tearing down on the run from every which way, some of them
-putting on their coats as they come. Pretty soon we was in the middle
-of a crowd, and the noise of the tramping was like a soldier march.
-The windows and dooryards was full; and every minute somebody would
-say, over a fence:
-
-"Is it _them?_"
-
-And somebody trotting along with the gang would answer back and say:
-
-"You bet it is."
-
-When we got to the house the street in front of it was packed, and the
-three girls was standing in the door. Mary Jane _was_ red-headed, but
-that don't make no difference, she was most awful beautiful, and her
-face and her eyes was all lit up like glory, she was so glad her
-uncles was come. The king he spread his arms, and Mary Jane she jumped
-for them, and the hare-lip jumped for the duke, and there they _had_
-it! Everybody most, leastways women, cried for joy to see them meet
-again at last and have such good times.
-
-Then the king he hunched the duke private--I see him do it--and then
-he looked around and see the coffin, over in the corner on two chairs;
-so then him and the duke, with a hand across each other's shoulder,
-and t'other hand to their eyes, walked slow and solemn over there,
-everybody dropping back to give them room, and all the talk and noise
-stopping, people saying "'Sh!" and all the men taking their hats off
-and drooping their heads, so you could 'a' heard a pin fall. And when
-they got there they bent over and looked in the coffin, and took one
-sight, and then they bust out a-crying so you could 'a' heard them to
-Orleans, most; and then they put their arms around each other's necks,
-and hung their chins over each other's shoulders; and then for three
-minutes, or maybe four, I never see two men leak the way they done.
-And, mind you, everybody was doing the same; and the place was that
-damp I never see anything like it. Then one of them got on one side of
-the coffin, and t'other on t'other side, and they kneeled down and
-rested their foreheads on the coffin, and let on to pray all to
-themselves. Well, when it come to that it worked the crowd like you
-never see anything like it, and everybody broke down and went to
-sobbing right out loud--the poor girls, too; and every woman, nearly,
-went up to the girls, without saying a word, and kissed them, solemn,
-on the forehead, and then put their hand on their head, and looked up
-towards the sky, with the tears running down, and then busted out and
-went off sobbing and swabbing, and give the next woman a show. I never
-see anything so disgusting. Well, by and by the king he gets up and
-comes forward a little, and works himself up and slobbers out a
-speech, all full of tears and flapdoodle, about its being a sore trial
-for him and his poor brother to lose the diseased, and to miss seeing
-diseased alive after the long journey of four thousand mile, but it's
-a trial that's sweetened and sanctified to us by this dear sympathy
-and these holy tears, and so he thanks them out of his heart and out
-of his brother's heart, because out of their mouths they can't, words
-being too weak and cold, and all that kind of rot and slush, till it
-was just sickening; and then he blubbers out a pious goody-goody Amen,
-and turns himself loose and goes to crying fit to bust.
-
-And the minute the words were out of his mouth somebody over in the
-crowd struck up the doxolojer, and everybody joined in with all their
-might, and it just warmed you up and made you feel as good as church
-letting out. Music is a good thing; and after all that soul-butter and
-hogwash I never see it freshen up things so, and sound so honest and
-bully.
-
-Then the king begins to work his jaw again, and says how him and his
-nieces would be glad if a few of the main principal friends of the
-family would take supper here with them this evening, and help set up
-with the ashes of the diseased; and says if his poor brother laying
-yonder could speak he knows who he would name, for they was names that
-was very dear to him, and mentioned often in his letters; and so he
-will name the same, to wit, as follows, viz.:--Rev. Mr. Hobson, and
-Deacon Lot Hovey, and Mr. Ben Rucker, and Abner Shackleford, and Levi
-Bell, and Dr. Robinson, and their wives, and the widow Bartley.
-
-Rev. Hobson and Dr. Robinson was down to the end of the town a-hunting
-together--that is, I mean the doctor was shipping a sick man to
-t'other world, and the preacher was pinting him right. Lawyer Bell was
-away up to Louisville on business. But the rest was on hand, and so
-they all come and shook hands with the king and thanked him and talked
-to him; and then they shook hands with the duke and didn't say
-nothing, but just kept a-smiling and bobbing their heads like a passel
-of sapheads whilst he made all sorts of signs with his hands and said
-"Goo-goo--goo-goo-goo" all the time, like a baby that can't talk.
-
-So the king he blattered along, and managed to inquire about pretty
-much everybody and dog in town, by his name, and mentioned all sorts
-of little things that happened one time or another in the town, or to
-George's family, or to Peter. And he always let on that Peter wrote
-him the things; but that was a lie: he got every blessed one of them
-out of that young flathead that we canoed up to the steamboat.
-
-Then Mary Jane she fetched the letter her father left behind, and the
-king he read it out loud and cried over it. It give the dwelling-house
-and three thousand dollars, gold, to the girls; and it give the
-tanyard (which was doing a good business), along with some other
-houses and land (worth about seven thousand), and three thousand
-dollars in gold to Harvey and William, and told where the six thousand
-cash was hid down cellar. So these two frauds said they'd go and fetch
-it up, and have everything square and above-board; and told me to come
-with a candle. We shut the cellar door behind us, and when they found
-the bag they spilt it out on the floor, and it was a lovely sight, all
-them yaller-boys. My, the way the king's eyes did shine! He slaps the
-duke on the shoulder and says:
-
-"Oh, _this_ ain't bully nor noth'n! Oh, no, I reckon not! Why, Biljy,
-it beats the Nonesuch, _don't_ it?"
-
-The duke allowed it did. They pawed the yaller-boys, and sifted them
-through their fingers and let them jingle down on the floor; and the
-king says:
-
-"It ain't no use talkin'; bein' brothers to a rich dead man and
-representatives of furrin heirs that's got left is the line for you
-and me, Bilge. Thish yer comes of trust'n to Providence. It's the best
-way, in the long run. I've tried 'em all, and ther' ain't no better
-way."
-
-Most everybody would 'a' been satisfied with the pile, and took it on
-trust; but no, they must count it. So they counts it, and it comes out
-four hundred and fifteen dollars short. Says the king:
-
-"Dern him, I wonder what he done with that four hundred and fifteen
-dollars?"
-
-They worried over that awhile, and ransacked all around for it. Then
-the duke says:
-
-"Well, he was a pretty sick man, and likely he made a mistake--I
-reckon that's the way of it. The best way's to let it go, and keep
-still about it. We can spare it."
-
-"Oh, shucks, yes, we can _spare_ it. I don't k'yer noth'n 'bout
-that--it's the _count_ I'm thinkin' about. We want to be awful square
-and open and above-board here, you know. We want to lug this h'yer
-money up-stairs and count it before everybody--then ther' ain't noth'n
-suspicious. But when the dead man says ther's six thous'n dollars, you
-know, we don't want to--"
-
-"Hold on," says the duke. "Le's make up the deffisit," and he begun to
-haul out yaller-boys out of his pocket.
-
-"It's a most amaz'n' good idea, duke--you _have_ got a rattlin' clever
-head on you," says the king. "Blest if the old Nonesuch ain't a
-heppin' us out ag'in," and _he_ begun to haul out yaller-jackets and
-stack them up.
-
-It most busted them, but they made up the six thousand clean and
-clear.
-
-"Say," says the duke, "I got another idea. Le's go up-stairs and count
-this money, and then take and _give it to the girls."_
-
-"Good land, duke, lemme hug you! It's the most dazzling idea 'at ever
-a man struck. You have cert'nly got the most astonishin' head I ever
-see. Oh, this is the boss dodge, ther' ain't no mistake 'bout it. Let
-'em fetch along their suspicions now if they want to--this 'll lay 'em
-out."
-
-When we got up-stairs everybody gethered around the table, and the
-king he counted it and stacked it up, three hundred dollars in a
-pile--twenty elegant little piles. Everybody looked hungry at it, and
-licked their chops. Then they raked it into the bag again, and I see
-the king begin to swell himself up for another speech. He says:
-
-"Friends all, my poor brother that lays yonder has done generous by
-them that's left behind in the vale of sorrers. He has done generous
-by these yer poor little lambs that he loved and sheltered, and that's
-left fatherless and motherless. Yes, and we that knowed him knows that
-he would 'a' done _more_ generous by 'em if he hadn't ben afeard o'
-woundin' his dear William and me. Now,  _wouldn't_ he? Ther' ain't no
-question 'bout it in _my_ mind. Well, then, what kind o' brothers
-would it be that 'd stand in his way at sech a time? And what kind o'
-uncles would it be that 'd rob--yes, _Rob_--sech poor sweet lambs as
-these 'at he loved so at sech a time? If I know William--and I _think_
-I do--he--well, I'll jest ask him." He turns around and begins to make
-a lot of signs to the duke with his hands, and the duke he looks at
-him stupid and leather-headed awhile; then all of a sudden he seems to
-catch his meaning, and jumps for the king, goo-gooing with all his
-might for joy, and hugs him about fifteen times before he lets up.
-Then the king says, "I knowed it; I reckon _that_ 'll convince anybody
-the way _he_ feels about it. Here, Mary Jane, Susan, Joanner, take the
-money--take it _all._ It's the gift of him that lays yonder, cold but
-joyful."
-
-Mary Jane she went for him, Susan and the hare-lip went for the duke,
-and then such another hugging and kissing I never see yet. And
-everybody crowded up with the tears in their eyes, and most shook the
-hands off of them frauds, saying all the time:
-
-"You _dear_ good souls!--how _lovely!_--how _could_ you!"
-
-Well, then, pretty soon all hands got to talking about the diseased
-again, and how good he was, and what a loss he was, and all that; and
-before long a big iron-jawed man worked himself in there from outside,
-and stood a-listening and looking, and not saying anything; and nobody
-saying anything to him either, because the king was talking and they
-was all busy listening. The king was saying--in the middle of
-something he'd started in on--
-
-"--they bein' partickler friends o' the diseased. That's why they're
-invited here this evenin'; but tomorrow we want _all_ to
-come--everybody; for he respected everybody, he liked everybody, and
-so it's fitten that his funeral orgies sh'd be public."
-
-And so he went a-mooning on and on, liking to hear himself talk, and
-every little while he fetched in his funeral orgies again, till the
-duke he couldn't stand it no more; so he writes on a little scrap of
-paper, "_Obsequies_, you old fool," and folds it up, and goes to
-goo-gooing and reaching it over people's heads to him. The king he
-reads it and puts it in his pocket, and says:
-
-"Poor William, afflicted as he is, his _heart's_ aluz right. Asks me
-to invite everybody to come to the funeral--wants me to make 'em all
-welcome. But he needn't 'a' worried--it was jest what I was at."
-
-Then he weaves along again, perfectly ca'm, and goes to dropping in
-his funeral orgies again every now and then, just like he done before.
-And when he done it the third time he says:
-
-"I say orgies, not because it's the common term, because it
-ain't--obsequies bein' the common term--but because orgies is the
-right term. Obsequies ain't used in England no more now--it's gone
-out. We say orgies now in England. Orgies is better, because it means
-the thing you're after more exact. It's a word that's made up out'n
-the Greek _orgo_, outside, open, abroad; and the Hebrew _jeesum_, to
-plant, cover up; hence in_ter_. So, you see, funeral orgies is an open
-er public funeral."
-
-He was the _worst_ I ever struck. Well, the iron-jawed man he laughed
-right in his face. Everybody was shocked. Everybody says, "Why,
-_doctor!_" and Abner Shackleford says:
-
-"Why, Robinson, hain't you heard the news? This is Harvey Wilks."
-
-The king he smiled eager, and shoved out his flapper, and says:
-
-"_Is_ it my poor brother's dear good friend and physician? I--"
-
-"Keep your hands off me!" says the doctor. "_You_ talk like an
-Englishman, _don't_ you? It's the worst imitation I ever heard. _You_
-Peter Wilks's brother! You're a fraud, that's what you are!"
-
-Well, how they all took on! They crowded around the doctor and tried
-to quiet him down, and tried to explain to him and tell him how
-Harvey's showed in forty ways that he _was_ Harvey, and knowed
-everybody by name, and the names of the very dogs, and begged and
-_begged_ him not to hurt Harvey's feelings and the poor girls'
-feelings, and all that. But it warn't no use; he stormed right along,
-and said any man that pretended to be an Englishman and couldn't
-imitate the lingo no better than what he did was a fraud and a liar.
-The poor girls was hanging to the king and crying; and all of a sudden
-the doctor ups and turns on _them._ He says:
-
-"I was your father's friend, and I'm your friend; and I warn you as a
-friend, and an honest one that wants to protect you and keep you out
-of harm and trouble, to turn your backs on that scoundrel and have
-nothing to do with him, the ignorant tramp, with his idiotic Greek and
-Hebrew, as he calls it. He is the thinnest kind of an impostor--has
-come here with a lot of empty names and facts which he picked up
-somewheres; and you take them for _proofs_, and are helped to fool
-yourselves by these foolish friends here, who ought to know better.
-Mary Jane Wilks, you know me for your friend, and for your unselfish
-friend, too. Now listen to me; turn this pitiful rascal out--I _beg_
-you to do it. Will you?"
-
-Mary Jane straightened herself up, and my, but she was handsome! She
-says:
-
-"_Here_ is my answer." She hove up the bag of money and put it in the
-king's hands, and says, "Take this six thousand dollars, and invest
-for me and my sisters any way you want to, and don't give us no
-receipt for it."
-
-Then she put her arm around the king on one side, and Susan and the
-hare-lip done the same on the other. Everybody clapped their hands and
-stomped on the floor like a perfect storm, whilst the king held up his
-head and smiled proud. The doctor says:
-
-"All right; I wash _my_ hands of the matter. But I warn you all that a
-time's coming when you're going to feel sick whenever you think of
-this day." And away he went.
-
-"All right, doctor," says the king, kinder mocking him; "we'll try and
-get 'em to send for you;" which made them all laugh, and they said it
-was a prime good hit.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXVI
-
-
-Well, when they was all gone the king he asks Mary Jane how they was
-off for spare rooms, and she said she had one spare room, which would
-do for Uncle William, and she'd give her own room to Uncle Harvey,
-which was a little bigger, and she would turn into the room with her
-sisters and sleep on a cot; and up garret was a little cubby, with a
-pallet in it. The king said the cubby would do for his valley--meaning
-me.
-
-So Mary Jane took us up, and she showed them their rooms, which was
-plain but nice. She said she'd have her frocks and a lot of other
-traps took out of her room if they was in Uncle Harvey's way, but he
-said they warn't. The frocks was hung along the wall, and before them
-was a curtain made out of calico that hung down to the floor. There
-was an old hair trunk in one corner, and a guitar-box in another, and
-all sorts of little knickknacks and jimcracks around, like girls
-brisken up a room with. The king said it was all the more homely and
-more pleasanter for these fixings, and so don't disturb them. The
-duke's room was pretty small, but plenty good enough, and so was my
-cubby.
-
-That night they had a big supper, and all them men and women was
-there, and I stood behind the king and the duke's chairs and waited on
-them, and the niggers waited on the rest. Mary Jane she set at the
-head of the table, with Susan alongside of her, and said how bad the
-biscuits was, and how mean the preserves was, and how ornery and tough
-the fried chickens was--and all that kind of rot, the way women always
-do for to force out compliments; and the people all knowed everything
-was tiptop, and said so--said "How _do_ you get biscuits to brown so
-nice?" and "Where, for the land's sake, _did_ you get these amaz'n
-pickles?" and all that kind of humbug talky-talk, just the way people
-always does at a supper, you know.
-
-And when it was all done me and the hare-lip had supper in the kitchen
-off of the leavings, whilst the others was helping the niggers clean
-up the things. The hare-lip she got to pumping me about England, and
-blest if I didn't think the ice was getting mighty thin sometimes. She
-says:
-
-"Did you ever see the king?"
-
-"Who? William Fourth? Well, I bet I have--he goes to our church." I
-knowed he was dead years ago, but I never let on. So when I says he
-goes to our church, she says:
-
-"What--regular?"
-
-"Yes--regular. His pew's right over opposite ourn--on t'other side the
-pulpit."
-
-"I thought he lived in London?"
-
-"Well, he does. Where _would_ he live?"
-
-"But I thought _you_ lived in Sheffield?"
-
-I see I was up a stump. I had to let on to get choked with a
-chicken-bone, so as to get time to think how to get down again. Then I
-says:
-
-"I mean he goes to our church regular when he's in Sheffield. That's
-only in the summer-time, when he comes there to take the sea baths."
-
-"Why, how you talk--Sheffield ain't on the sea."
-
-"Well, who said it was?"
-
-"Why, you did."
-
-"I _didn't_, nuther."
-
-"You did!"
-
-"I didn't."
-
-"You did."
-
-"I never said nothing of the kind."
-
-"Well, what _did_ you say, then?"
-
-"Said he come to take the sea _baths_--that's what I said."
-
-"Well, then, how's he going to take the sea baths if it ain't on the
-sea?"
-
-"Looky here," I says; "did you ever see any Congress-water?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Well, did you have to go to Congress to get it?"
-
-"Why, no."
-
-"Well, neither does William Fourth have to go to the sea to get a sea
-bath."
-
-"How does he get it, then?"
-
-"Gets it the way people down here gets Congress-water--in barrels.
-There in the palace at Sheffield they've got furnaces, and he wants
-his water hot. They can't bile that amount of water away off there at
-the sea. They haven't got no conveniences for it."
-
-"Oh, I see, now. You might 'a' said that in the first place and saved
-time."
-
-When she said that I see I was out of the woods again, and so I was
-comfortable and glad. Next, she says:
-
-"Do you go to church, too?"
-
-"Yes--regular."
-
-"Where do you set?"
-
-"Why, in our pew."
-
-"_Whose_ pew?"
-
-"Why, _ourn_--your Uncle Harvey's."
-
-"His'n? What does _he_ want with a pew?"
-
-"Wants it to set in. What did you _reckon_ he wanted with it?"
-
-"Why, I thought he'd be in the pulpit."
-
-Rot him, I forgot he was a preacher. I see I was up a stump again, so
-I played another chicken-bone and got another think. Then I says:
-
-"Blame it, do you suppose there ain't but one preacher to a church?"
-
-"Why, what do they want with more?"
-
-"What!--to preach before a king? I never did see such a girl as you.
-They don't have no less than seventeen."
-
-"Seventeen! My land! Why, I wouldn't set out such a string as that,
-not if I _never_ got to glory. It must take 'em a week."
-
-"Shucks, they don't _all_ of 'em preach the same day--only _one_ of
-'em."
-
-"Well, then, what does the rest of 'em do?"
-
-"Oh, nothing much. Loll around, pass the plate--and one thing or
-another. But mainly they don't do nothing."
-
-"Well, then, what are they _for_?"
-
-"Why, they're for _style_. Don't you know nothing?"
-
-"Well, I don't _want_ to know no such foolishness as that. How is
-servants treated in England? Do they treat 'em better 'n we treat our
-niggers?"
-
-"_No!_ A servant ain't nobody there. They treat them worse than dogs."
-
-"Don't they give 'em holidays, the way we do, Christmas and New Year's
-week, and Fourth of July?"
-
-"Oh, just listen! A body could tell _you_ hain't ever been to England
-by that. Why, Hare-l--why, Joanna, they never see a holiday from
-year's end to year's end; never go to the circus, nor theater, nor
-nigger shows, nor nowheres."
-
-"Nor church?"
-
-"Nor church."
-
-"But _you_ always went to church."
-
-Well, I was gone up again. I forgot I was the old man's servant. But
-next minute I whirled in on a kind of an explanation how a valley was
-different from a common servant, and _had_ to go to church whether he
-wanted to or not, and set with the family, on account of its being the
-law. But I didn't do it pretty good, and when I got done I see she
-warn't satisfied. She says:
-
-"Honest injun, now, hain't you been telling me a lot of lies?"
-
-"Honest injun," says I.
-
-"None of it at all?"
-
-"None of it at all. Not a lie in it," says I.
-
-"Lay your hand on this book and say it."
-
-I see it warn't nothing but a dictionary, so I laid my hand on it and
-said it. So then she looked a little better satisfied, and says:
-
-"Well, then, I'll believe some of it; but I hope to gracious if I'll
-believe the rest."
-
-"What is it you won't believe, Jo?" says Mary Jane, stepping in with
-Susan behind her. "It ain't right nor kind for you to talk so to him,
-and him a stranger and so far from his people. How would you like to
-be treated so?"
-
-"That's always your way, Maim--always sailing in to help somebody
-before they're hurt. I hain't done nothing to him. He's told some
-stretchers, I reckon, and I said I wouldn't swallow it all; and that's
-every bit and grain I _did_ say. I reckon he can stand a little thing
-like that, can't he?"
-
-"I don't care whether 'twas little or whether 'twas big; he's here in
-our house and a stranger, and it wasn't good of you to say it. If you
-was in his place it would make you feel ashamed; and so you oughtn't
-to say a thing to another person that will make _them_ feel ashamed."
-
-"Why, Maim, he said--"
-
-"It don't make no difference what he _said_--that ain't the thing. The
-thing is for you to treat him _kind,_ and not be saying things to make
-him remember he ain't in his own country and amongst his own folks."
-
-I says to myself, _this_ is a girl that I'm letting that old reptile
-rob her of her money!
-
-Then Susan _she_ waltzed in; and if you'll believe me, she did give
-Hare-lip hark from the tomb!
-
-Says I to myself, and this is _another_ one that I'm letting him rob
-her of her money!
-
-Then Mary Jane she took another inning, and went in sweet and lovely
-again--which was her way; but when she got done there warn't hardly
-anything left o' poor Hare-lip. So she hollered.
-
-"All right, then," says the other girls; "you just ask his pardon."
-
-She done it, too; and she done it beautiful. She done it so beautiful
-it was good to hear; and I wished I could tell her a thousand lies, so
-she could do it again.
-
-I says to myself, this is _another_ one that I'm letting him rob her
-of her money. And when she got through they all jest laid theirselves
-out to make me feel at home and know I was amongst friends. I felt so
-ornery and low down and mean that I says to myself, my mind's made up;
-I'll hive that money for them or bust.
-
-So then I lit out--for bed, I said, meaning some time or another. When
-I got by myself I went to thinking the thing over. I says to myself,
-shall I go to that doctor, private, and blow on these frauds? No--that
-won't do. He might tell who told him; then the king and the duke would
-make it warm for me. Shall I go, private, and tell Mary Jane? No--I
-dasn't do it. Her face would give them a hint, sure; they've got the
-money, and they'd slide right out and get away with it. If she was to
-fetch in help I'd get mixed up in the business before it was done
-with, I judge. No; there ain't no good way but one. I got to steal
-that money, somehow; and I got to steal it some way that they won't
-suspicion that I done it. They've got a good thing here, and they
-ain't a-going to leave till they've played this family and this town
-for all they're worth, so I'll find a chance time enough. I'll steal
-it and hide it; and by and by, when I'm away down the river, I'll
-write a letter and tell Mary Jane where it's hid. But I better hive it
-to-night if I can, because the doctor maybe hasn't let up as much as
-he lets on he has; he might scare them out of here yet.
-
-So, thinks I, I'll go and search them rooms. Upstairs the hall was
-dark, but I found the duke's room, and started to paw around it with
-my hands; but I recollected it wouldn't be much like the king to let
-anybody else take care of that money but his own self; so then I went
-to his room and begun to paw around there. But I see I couldn't do
-nothing without a candle, and I dasn't light one, of course. So I
-judged I'd got to do the other thing--lay for them and eavesdrop.
-About that time I hears their footsteps coming, and was going to skip
-under the bed; I reached for it, but it wasn't where I thought it
-would be; but I touched the curtain that hid Mary Jane's frocks, so I
-jumped in behind that and snuggled in amongst the gowns, and stood
-there perfectly still. They come in and shut the door; and the first
-thing the duke done was to get down and look under the bed. Then I was
-glad I hadn't found the bed when I wanted it. And yet, you know, it's
-kind of natural to hide under the bed when you are up to anything
-private. They sets down then, and the king says:
-
-"Well, what is it? And cut it middlin' short, because it's better for
-us to be down there a-whoopin' up the mournin' than up here givin' 'em
-a chance to talk us over."
-
-"Well, this is it, Capet. I ain't easy; I ain't comfortable. That
-doctor lays on my mind. I wanted to know your plans. I've got a
-notion, and I think it's a sound one."
-
-"What is it, duke?"
-
-"That we better glide out of this before three in the morning, and
-clip it down the river with what we've got. Specially, seeing we got
-it so easy--_given_ back to us, flung at our heads, as you may say,
-when of course we allowed to have to steal it back. I'm for knocking
-off and lighting out."
-
-That made me feel pretty bad. About an hour or two ago it would 'a'
-been a little different, but now it made me feel bad and disappointed.
-The king rips out and says:
-
-"What! And not sell out the rest o' the property? March off like a
-passel of fools and leave eight or nine thous'n' dollars' worth o'
-property layin' around jest sufferin' to be scooped in?--and all good,
-salable stuff, too."
-
-The duke he grumbled; said the bag of gold was enough, and he didn't
-want to go no deeper--didn't want to rob a lot of orphans of
-_everything_ they had.
-
-"Why, how you talk!" says the king. "We sha'n't rob 'em of nothing at
-all but jest this money. The people that _buys_ the property is the
-suff'rers; because as soon 's it's found out 'at we didn't own
-it--which won't be long after we've slid--the sale won't be valid, and
-it 'll all go back to the estate. These yer orphans 'll git their
-house back ag'in, and that's enough for _them;_ they're young and
-spry, and k'n easy earn a livin'. _They_ ain't a-goin' to suffer. Why,
-jest think--there's thous'n's and thous'n's that ain't nigh so well
-off. Bless you, _they_ ain't got noth'n' to complain of."
-
-Well, the king he talked him blind; so at last he give in, and said
-all right, but said he believed it was blamed foolishness to stay, and
-that doctor hanging over them. But the king says:
-
-"Cuss the doctor! What do we k'yer for _him?_ Hain't we got all the
-fools in town on our side? And ain't that a big enough majority in any
-town?"
-
-So they got ready to go down-stairs again. The duke says:
-
-"I don't think we put that money in a good place."
-
-That cheered me up. I'd begun to think I warn't going to get a hint of
-no kind to help me. The king says:
-
-"Why?"
-
-"Because Mary Jane 'll be in mourning from this out; and first you
-know the nigger that does up the rooms will get an order to box these
-duds up and put 'em away; and do you reckon a nigger can run across
-money and not borrow some of it?"
-
-"Your head's level ag'in, duke," says the king; and he comes
-a-fumbling under the curtain two or three foot from where I was. I
-stuck tight to the wall and kept mighty still, though quivery; and I
-wondered what them fellows would say to me if they catched me; and I
-tried to think what I'd better do if they did catch me. But the king
-he got the bag before I could think more than about a half a thought,
-and he never suspicioned I was around. They took and shoved the bag
-through a rip in the straw tick that was under the feather-bed, and
-crammed it in a foot or two amongst the straw and said it was all
-right now, because a nigger only makes up the feather-bed, and don't
-turn over the straw tick only about twice a year, and so it warn't in
-no danger of getting stole now.
-
-But I knowed better. I had it out of there before they was half-way
-down-stairs. I groped along up to my cubby, and hid it there till I
-could get a chance to do better. I judged I better hide it outside of
-the house somewheres, because if they missed it they would give the
-house a good ransacking: I knowed that very well. Then I turned in,
-with my clothes all on; but I couldn't 'a' gone to sleep if I'd 'a'
-wanted to, I was in such a sweat to get through with the business. By
-and by I heard the king and the duke come up; so I rolled off my
-pallet and laid with my chin at the top of my ladder, and waited to
-see if anything was going to happen. But nothing did.
-
-So I held on till all the late sounds had quit and the early ones
-hadn't begun yet; and then I slipped down the ladder.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXVII
-
-
-I crept to their doors and listened; they was snoring. So I tiptoed
-along, and got downstairs all right. There warn't a sound anywheres. I
-peeped through a crack of the dining-room door, and see the men that
-was watching the corpse all sound asleep on their chairs. The door was
-open into the parlor, where the corpse was laying, and there was a
-candle in both rooms. I passed along, and the parlor door was open;
-but I see there warn't nobody in there but the remainders of Peter; so
-I shoved on by; but the front door was locked, and the key wasn't
-there. Just then I heard somebody coming down the stairs, back behind
-me. I run in the parlor and took a swift look around, and the only
-place I see to hide the bag was in the coffin. The lid was shoved
-along about a foot, showing the dead man's face down in there, with a
-wet cloth over it, and his shroud on. I tucked the money-bag in under
-the lid, just down beyond where his hands was crossed, which made me
-creep, they was so cold, and then I run back across the room and in
-behind the door.
-
-The person coming was Mary Jane. She went to the coffin, very soft,
-and kneeled down and looked in; then she put up her handkerchief, and
-I see she begun to cry, though I couldn't hear her, and her back was
-to me. I slid out, and as I passed the dining-room I thought I'd make
-sure them watchers hadn't seen me; so I looked through the crack, and
-everything was all right. They hadn't stirred.
-
-I slipped up to bed, feeling ruther blue, on accounts of the thing
-playing out that way after I had took so much trouble and run so much
-resk about it. Says I, if it could stay where it is, all right;
-because when we get down the river a hundred mile or two I could write
-back to Mary Jane, and she could dig him up again and get it; but that
-ain't the thing that's going to happen; the thing that's going to
-happen is, the money'll be found when they come to screw on the lid.
-Then the king 'll get it again, and it 'll be a long day before he
-gives anybody another chance to smouch it from him. Of course I
-_wanted_ to slide down and get it out of there, but I dasn't try it.
-Every minute it was getting earlier now, and pretty soon some of them
-watchers would begin to stir, and I might get catched--catched with
-six thousand dollars in my hands that nobody hadn't hired me to take
-care of. I don't wish to be mixed up in no such business as that, I
-says to myself.
-
-When I got down-stairs in the morning the parlor was shut up, and the
-watchers was gone. There warn't nobody around but the family and the
-widow Bartley and our tribe. I watched their faces to see if anything
-had been happening, but I couldn't tell.
-
-Towards the middle of the day the undertaker come with his man, and
-they set the coffin in the middle of the room on a couple of chairs,
-and then set all our chairs in rows, and borrowed more from the
-neighbors till the hall and the parlor and the dining-room was full. I
-see the coffin lid was the way it was before, but I dasn't go to look
-in under it, with folks around.
-
-Then the people begun to flock in, and the beats and the girls took
-seats in the front row at the head of the coffin, and for a half an
-hour the people filed around slow, in single rank, and looked down at
-the dead man's face a minute, and some dropped in a tear, and it was
-all very still and solemn, only the girls and the beats holding
-handkerchiefs to their eyes and keeping their heads bent, and sobbing
-a little. There warn't no other sound but the scraping of the feet on
-the floor and blowing noses--because people always blows them more at
-a funeral than they do at other places except church.
-
-When the place was packed full the undertaker he slid around in his
-black gloves with his softy soothering ways, putting on the last
-touches, and getting people and things all ship-shape and comfortable,
-and making no more sound than a cat. He never spoke; he moved people
-around, he squeezed in late ones, he opened up passageways, and done
-it with nods, and signs with his hands. Then he took his place over
-against the wall. He was the softest, glidingest, stealthiest man I
-ever see; and there warn't no more smile to him than there is to a
-ham.
-
-They had borrowed a melodeum--a sick one; and when everything was
-ready a young woman set down and worked it, and it was pretty skreeky
-and colicky, and everybody joined in and sung, and Peter was the only
-one that had a good thing, according to my notion. Then the Reverend
-Hobson opened up, slow and solemn, and begun to talk; and straight off
-the most outrageous row busted out in the cellar a body ever heard; it
-was only one dog, but he made a most powerful racket, and he kept it
-up right along; the parson he had to stand there, over the coffin, and
-wait--you couldn't hear yourself think. It was right down awkward, and
-nobody didn't seem to know what to do. But pretty soon they see that
-long-legged undertaker make a sign to the preacher as much as to say,
-"Don't you worry--just depend on me." Then he stooped down and begun
-to glide along the wall, just his shoulders showing over the people's
-heads. So he glided along, and the powwow and racket getting more and
-more outrageous all the time; and at last, when he had gone around two
-sides of the room, he disappears down cellar. Then in about two
-seconds we heard a whack, and the dog he finished up with a most
-amazing howl or two, and then everything was dead still, and the
-parson begun his solemn talk where he left off. In a minute or two
-here comes this undertaker's back and shoulders gliding along the wall
-again; and so he glided and glided around three sides of the room, and
-then rose up, and shaded his mouth with his hands, and stretched his
-neck out towards the preacher, over the people's heads, and says, in a
-kind of a coarse whisper, "_He had a rat!_" Then he drooped down and
-glided along the wall again to his place. You could see it was a great
-satisfaction to the people, because naturally they wanted to know. A
-little thing like that don't cost nothing, and it's just the little
-things that makes a man to be looked up to and liked. There warn't no
-more popular man in town than what that undertaker was.
-
-Well, the funeral sermon was very good, but pison long and tiresome;
-and then the king he shoved in and got off some of his usual rubbage,
-and at last the job was through, and the undertaker begun to sneak up
-on the coffin with his screw-driver. I was in a sweat then, and
-watched him pretty keen. But he never meddled at all; just slid the
-lid along as soft as mush, and screwed it down tight and fast. So
-there I was! I didn't know whether the money was in there or not. So,
-says I, s'pose somebody has hogged that bag on the sly?--now how do
-_I_ know whether to write to Mary Jane or not? S'pose she dug him up
-and didn't find nothing, what would she think of me? Blame it, I says,
-I might get hunted up and jailed; I'd better lay low and keep dark,
-and not write at all; the thing's awful mixed now; trying to better
-it, I've worsened it a hundred times, and I wish to goodness I'd just
-let it alone, dad fetch the whole business!
-
-They buried him, and we come back home, and I went to watching faces
-again--I couldn't help it, and I couldn't rest easy. But nothing come
-of it; the faces didn't tell me nothing.
-
-The king he visited around in the evening, and sweetened everybody up,
-and made himself ever so friendly; and he give out the idea that his
-congregation over in England would be in a sweat about him, so he must
-hurry and settle up the estate right away and leave for home. He was
-very sorry he was so pushed, and so was everybody; they wished he
-could stay longer, but they said they could see it couldn't be done.
-And he said of course him and William would take the girls home with
-them; and that pleased everybody too, because then the girls would be
-well fixed and amongst their own relations; and it pleased the girls,
-too--tickled them so they clean forgot they ever had a trouble in the
-world; and told him to sell out as quick as he wanted to, they would
-be ready. Them poor things was that glad and happy it made my heart
-ache to see them getting fooled and lied to so, but I didn't see no
-safe way for me to chip in and change the general tune.
-
-Well, blamed if the king didn't bill the house and the niggers and all
-the property for auction straight off--sale two days after the
-funeral; but anybody could buy private beforehand if they wanted to.
-
-So the next day after the funeral, along about noon-time, the girls'
-joy got the first jolt. A couple of nigger-traders come along, and the
-king sold them the niggers reasonable, for three-day drafts as they
-called it, and away they went, the two sons up the river to Memphis,
-and their mother down the river to Orleans. I thought them poor girls
-and them niggers would break their hearts for grief; they cried around
-each other, and took on so it most made me down sick to see it. The
-girls said they hadn't ever dreamed of seeing the family separated or
-sold away from the town. I can't ever get it out of my memory, the
-sight of them poor miserable girls and niggers hanging around each
-other's necks and crying; and I reckon I couldn't 'a' stood it all,
-but would 'a' had to bust out and tell on our gang if I hadn't knowed
-the sale warn't no account and the niggers would be back home in a
-week or two.
-
-The thing made a big stir in the town, too, and a good many come out
-flatfooted and said it was scandalous to separate the mother and the
-children that way. It injured the frauds some; but the old fool he
-bulled right along, spite of all the duke could say or do, and I tell
-you the duke was powerful uneasy.
-
-Next day was auction day. About broad day in the morning the king and
-the duke come up in the garret and woke me up, and I see by their look
-that there was trouble. The king says:
-
-"Was you in my room night before last?"
-
-"No, your majesty"--which was the way I always called him when nobody
-but our gang warn't around.
-
-"Was you in there yisterday er last night?"
-
-"No, your majesty."
-
-"Honor bright, now--no lies."
-
-"Honor bright, your majesty, I'm telling you the truth. I hain't been
-a-near your room since Miss Mary Jane took you and the duke and showed
-it to you."
-
-The duke says:
-
-"Have you seen anybody else go in there?"
-
-"No, your grace, not as I remember, I believe."
-
-"Stop and think."
-
-I studied awhile and see my chance; then I says: "Well, I see the
-niggers go in there several times."
-
-Both of them gave a little jump, and looked like they hadn't ever
-expected it, and then like they _had_. Then the duke says:
-
-"What, _all_ of them?"
-
-"No--leastways, not all at once--that is, I don't think I ever see
-them all come _out_ at once but just one time."
-
-"Hello!  When was that?"
-
-"It was the day we had the funeral. In the morning. It warn't early,
-because I overslept. I was just starting down the ladder, and I see
-them."
-
-"Well, go on, _go_ on! What did they do? How'd they act?"
-
-"They didn't do nothing. And they didn't act anyway much, as fur as I
-see. They tiptoed away; so I seen, easy enough, that they'd shoved in
-there to do up your majesty's room, or something, s'posing you was up;
-and found you _warn't_ up, and so they was hoping to slide out of the
-way of trouble without waking you up, if they hadn't already waked you
-up."
-
-"Great guns, _this_ is a go!" says the king; and both of them looked
-pretty sick and tolerable silly. They stood there a-thinking and
-scratching their heads a minute, and the duke he bust into a kind of a
-little raspy chuckle, and says:
-
-"It does beat all how neat the niggers played their hand. They let on
-to be _sorry_ they was going out of this region! And I believed they
-_was_ sorry, and so did you, and so did everybody. Don't ever tell
-_me_ any more that a nigger ain't got any histrionic talent. Why, the
-way they played that thing it would fool _anybody._ In my opinion,
-there's a fortune in 'em. If I had capital and a theater, I wouldn't
-want a better lay-out than that--and here we've gone and sold 'em for
-a song. Yes, and ain't privileged to sing the song yet. Say, where
-_is_ that song--that draft?"
-
-"In the bank for to be collected. Where _would_ it be?"
-
-"Well, that's all right then, thank goodness."
-
-Says I, kind of timid-like:
-
-"Is something gone wrong?"
-
-The king whirls on me and rips out:
-
-"None o' your business! You keep your head shet, and mind y'r own
-affairs--if you got any. Long as you're in this town don't you forgit
-_that_--you hear?" Then he says to the duke, "We got to jest swaller
-it and say noth'n': mum's the word for _us_."
-
-As they was starting down the ladder the duke he chuckles again, and
-says:
-
-"Quick sales _and_ small profits! It's a good business--yes."
-
-The king snarls around on him and says:
-
-"I was trying to do for the best in sellin' 'em out so quick. If the
-profits has turned out to be none, lackin' considable, and none to
-carry, is it my fault any more'n it's yourn?"
-
-"Well, _they'd_ be in this house yet and we _wouldn't_ if I could 'a'
-got my advice listened to."
-
-The king sassed back as much as was safe for him, and then swapped
-around and lit into _me_ again. He give me down the banks for not
-coming and _telling_ him I see the niggers come out of his room acting
-that way--said any fool would 'a' _knowed_ something was up. And then
-waltzed in and cussed _himself_ awhile, and said it all come of him
-not laying late and taking his natural rest that morning, and he'd be
-blamed if he'd ever do it again. So they went off a-jawing; and I felt
-dreadful glad I'd worked it all off onto the niggers, and yet hadn't
-done the niggers no harm by it.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXVIII
-
-
-By and by it was getting-up time. So I come down the ladder and
-started for down-stairs; but as I come to the girls' room the door was
-open, and I see Mary Jane setting by her old hair trunk, which was
-open and she'd been packing things in it--getting ready to go to
-England. But she had stopped now with a folded gown in her lap, and
-had her face in her hands, crying. I felt awful bad to see it; of
-course anybody would. I went in there and says:
-
-"Miss Mary Jane, you can't a-bear to see people in trouble, and _I_
-can't--most always. Tell me about it."
-
-So she done it. And it was the niggers--I just expected it. She said
-the beautiful trip to England was most about spoiled for her; she
-didn't know _how_ she was ever going to be happy there, knowing the
-mother and the children warn't ever going to see each other no
-more--and then busted out bitterer than ever, and flung up her hands,
-and says:
-
-"Oh, dear, dear, to think they ain't _ever_ going to see each other
-any more!"
-
-"But they _will_--and inside of two weeks--and I _know_ it!" says I.
-
-Laws, it was out before I could think! And before I could budge she
-throws her arms around my neck and told me to say it _again_, say it
-_again_, say it _again!_
-
-I see I had spoke too sudden and said too much, and was in a close
-place. I asked her to let me think a minute; and she set there, very
-impatient and excited and handsome, but looking kind of happy and
-eased-up, like a person that's had a tooth pulled out. So I went to
-studying it out. I says to myself, I reckon a body that ups and tells
-the truth when he is in a tight place is taking considerable many
-resks, though I ain't had no experience, and can't say for certain;
-but it looks so to me, anyway; and yet here's a case where I'm blest
-if it don't look to me like the truth is better and actuly _safer_
-than a lie. I must lay it by in my mind, and think it over some time
-or other, it's so kind of strange and unregular. I never see nothing
-like it. Well, I says to myself at last, I'm a-going to chance it;
-I'll up and tell the truth this time, though it does seem most _like_
-setting down on a kag of powder and touching it off just to see where
-you'll go to. Then I says:
-
-"Miss Mary Jane, is there any place out of town a little ways where
-you could go and stay three or four days?"
-
-"Yes; Mr. Lothrop's. Why?"
-
-"Never mind why yet. If I'll tell you how I know the niggers will see
-each other again--inside of two weeks--here in this house--and _prove_
-how I know it--will you go to Mr. Lothrop's and stay four days?"
-
-"Four days!" she says; "I'll stay a year!"
-
-"All right," I says, "I don't want nothing more out of _you_ than just
-your word--I druther have it than another man's kiss-the-Bible."  She
-smiled and reddened up very sweet, and I says, "If you don't mind it,
-I'll shut the door--and bolt it."
-
-Then I come back and set down again, and says:
-
-"Don't you holler. Just set still and take it like a man. I got to
-tell the truth, and you want to brace up, Miss Mary, because it's a
-bad kind, and going to be hard to take, but there ain't no help for
-it. These uncles of yourn ain't no uncles at all; they're a couple of
-frauds--regular dead-beats. There, now we're over the worst of it, you
-can stand the rest middling easy."
-
-It jolted her up like everything, of course; but I was over the shoal
-water now, so I went right along, her eyes a-blazing higher and higher
-all the time, and told her every blame thing, from where we first
-struck that young fool going up to the steamboat, clear through to
-where she flung herself onto the king's breast at the front door and
-he kissed her sixteen or seventeen times--and then up she jumps, with
-her face afire like sunset, and says:
-
-"The brute! Come, don't waste a minute--not a _second_--we'll have
-them tarred and feathered, and flung in the river!"
-
-Says I:
-
-"Cert'nly. But do you mean _before_ you go to Mr. Lothrop's, or--"
-
-"Oh," she says, "what am I _thinking_ about!" she says, and set right
-down again. "Don't mind what I said--please don't--you _won't_, now,
-_will_ you?" Laying her silky hand on mine in that kind of a way that
-I said I would die first. "I never thought, I was so stirred up," she
-says; "now go on, and I won't do so any more. You tell me what to do,
-and whatever you say I'll do it."
-
-"Well," I says, "it's a rough gang, them two frauds, and I'm fixed so
-I got to travel with them a while longer, whether I want to or not--I
-druther not tell you why; and if you was to blow on them this town
-would get me out of their claws, and I'd be all right; but there'd be
-another person that you don't know about who'd be in big trouble.
-Well, we got to save _him_, hain't we? Of course. Well, then, we won't
-blow on them."
-
-Saying them words put a good idea in my head. I see how maybe I could
-get me and Jim rid of the frauds; get them jailed here, and then
-leave. But I didn't want to run the raft in the daytime without
-anybody aboard to answer questions but me; so I didn't want the plan
-to begin working till pretty late to-night. I says:
-
-"Miss Mary Jane, I'll tell you what we'll do, and you won't have to
-stay at Mr. Lothrop's so long, nuther. How fur is it?"
-
-"A little short of four miles--right out in the country, back here."
-
-"Well, that 'll answer. Now you go along out there, and lay low till
-nine or half past to-night, and then get them to fetch you home
-again--tell them you've thought of something. If you get here before
-eleven put a candle in this window, and if I don't turn up wait _till_
-eleven, and _then_ if I don't turn up it means I'm gone, and out of
-the way, and safe. Then you come out and spread the news around, and
-get these beats jailed."
-
-"Good," she says, "I'll do it."
-
-"And if it just happens so that I don't get away, but get took up
-along with them, you must up and say I told you the whole thing
-beforehand, and you must stand by me all you can."
-
-"Stand by you! indeed I will. They sha'n't touch a hair of your head!"
-she says, and I see her nostrils spread and her eyes snap when she
-said it, too.
-
-"If I get away I sha'n't be here," I says, "to prove these
-rapscallions ain't your uncles, and I couldn't do it if I _was_ here.
-I could swear they was beats and bummers, that's all, though that's
-worth something. Well, there's others can do that better than what I
-can, and they're people that ain't going to be doubted as quick as I'd
-be. I'll tell you how to find them. Gimme a pencil and a piece of
-paper. There--'_Royal Nonesuch,  Bricksville._' Put it away, and don't
-lose it. When the court wants to find out something about these two,
-let them send up to Bricksville and say they've got the men that
-played the 'Royal Nonesuch,' and ask for some witnesses--why, you'll
-have that entire town down here before you can hardly wink, Miss Mary.
-And they'll come a-biling, too."
-
-I judged we had got everything fixed about right now. So I says:
-
-"Just let the auction go right along, and don't worry. Nobody don't
-have to pay for the things they buy till a whole day after the auction
-on accounts of the short notice, and they ain't going out of this till
-they get that money; and the way we've fixed it the sale ain't going
-to count, and they ain't going to get no money. It's just like the way
-it was with the niggers--it warn't no sale, and the niggers will be
-back before long. Why, they can't collect the money for the _niggers_
-yet--they're in the worst kind of a fix, Miss Mary."
-
-"Well," she says, "I'll run down to breakfast now, and then I'll start
-straight for Mr. Lothrop's."
-
-"'Deed, _that_ ain't the ticket, Miss Mary Jane," I says, "by no
-manner of means; go _before_ breakfast."
-
-"Why?"
-
-"What did you reckon I wanted you to go at all for, Miss Mary?"
-
-"Well, I never thought--and come to think, I don't know. What was it?"
-
-"Why, it's because you ain't one of these leather-face people. I don't
-want no better book than what your face is. A body can set down and
-read it off like coarse print. Do you reckon you can go and face your
-uncles when they come to kiss you good-morning, and never--"
-
-"There, there, don't! Yes, I'll go before breakfast--I'll be glad to.
-And leave my sisters with them?"
-
-"Yes; never mind about them. They've got to stand it yet awhile. They
-might suspicion something if all of you was to go. I don't want you to
-see them, nor your sisters, nor nobody in this town; if a neighbor was
-to ask how is your uncles this morning your face would tell something.
-No, you go right along, Miss Mary Jane, and I'll fix it with all of
-them. I'll tell Miss Susan to give your love to your uncles and say
-you've went away for a few hours for to get a little rest and change,
-or to see a friend, and you'll be back to-night or early in the
-morning."
-
-"Gone to see a friend is all right, but I won't have my love given to
-them."
-
-"Well, then, it sha'n't be." It was well enough to tell _her_ so--no
-harm in it. It was only a little thing to do, and no trouble; and it's
-the little things that smooths people's roads the most, down here
-below; it would make Mary Jane comfortable, and it wouldn't cost
-nothing. Then I says: "There's one more thing--that bag of money."
-
-"Well, they've got that; and it makes me feel pretty silly to think
-_how_ they got it."
-
-"No, you're out, there. They hain't got it."
-
-"Why, who's got it?"
-
-"I wish I knowed, but I don't. I _had_ it, because I stole it from
-them; and I stole it to give to you; and I know where I hid it, but
-I'm afraid it ain't there no more. I'm awful sorry, Miss Mary Jane,
-I'm just as sorry as I can be; but I done the best I could; I did
-honest. I come nigh getting caught, and I had to shove it into the
-first place I come to, and run--and it warn't a good place."
-
-"Oh, stop blaming yourself--it's too bad to do it, and I won't allow
-it--you couldn't help it; it wasn't your fault. Where did you hide
-it?"
-
-I didn't want to set her to thinking about her troubles again; and I
-couldn't seem to get my mouth to tell her what would make her see that
-corpse laying in the coffin with that bag of money on his stomach. So
-for a minute I didn't say nothing; then I says:
-
-"I'd ruther not _tell_ you where I put it, Miss Mary Jane, if you
-don't mind letting me off; but I'll write it for you on a piece of
-paper, and you can read it along the road to Mr. Lothrop's, if you
-want to. Do you reckon that 'll do?"
-
-"Oh, yes."
-
-So I wrote: "I put it in the coffin. It was in there when you was
-crying there, away in the night. I was behind the door, and I was
-mighty sorry for you, Miss Mary Jane."
-
-It made my eyes water a little to remember her crying there all by
-herself in the night, and them devils laying there right under her own
-roof, shaming her and robbing her; and when I folded it up and give it
-to her I see the water come into her eyes, too; and she shook me by
-the hand, hard, and says:
-
-"_Good_-by. I'm going to do everything just as you've told me; and if
-I don't ever see you again, I sha'n't ever forget you, and I'll think
-of you a many and a many a time, and I'll _pray_ for you, too!"--and
-she was gone.
-
-Pray for me! I reckoned if she knowed me she'd take a job that was
-more nearer her size. But I bet she done it, just the same--she was
-just that kind. She had the grit to pray for Judus if she took the
-notion--there warn't no back-down to her, I judge. You may say what
-you want to, but in my opinion she had more sand in her than any girl
-I ever see; in my opinion she was just full of sand. It sounds like
-flattery, but it ain't no flattery. And when it comes to beauty--and
-goodness, too--she lays over them all. I hain't ever seen her since
-that time that I see her go out of that door; no, I hain't ever seen
-her since, but I reckon I've thought of her a many and a many a
-million times, and of her saying she would pray for me; and if ever
-I'd 'a' thought it would do any good for me to pray for _her_, blamed
-if I wouldn't 'a' done it or bust.
-
-Well, Mary Jane she lit out the back way, I reckon; because nobody see
-her go. When I struck Susan and the hare-lip, I says:
-
-"What's the name of them people over on t'other side of the river that
-you all goes to see sometimes?"
-
-They says:
-
-"There's several; but it's the Proctors, mainly."
-
-"That's the name," I says; "I most forgot it. Well, Miss Mary Jane she
-told me to tell you she's gone over there in a dreadful hurry--one of
-them's sick."
-
-"Which one?"
-
-"I don't know; leastways, I kinder forget; but I thinks it's--"
-
-"Sakes alive, I hope it ain't _Hanner?_"
-
-"I'm sorry to say it," I says, "but Hanner's the very one."
-
-"My goodness, and she so well only last week! Is she took bad?"
-
-"It ain't no name for it. They set up with her all night, Miss Mary
-Jane said, and they don't think she'll last many hours."
-
-"Only think of that, now! What's the matter with her?"
-
-I couldn't think of anything reasonable, right off that way, so I
-says:
-
-"Mumps."
-
-"Mumps your granny! They don't set up with people that's got the
-mumps."
-
-"They don't, don't they? You better bet they do with _these_ mumps.
-These mumps is different. It's a new kind, Miss Mary Jane said."
-
-"How's it a new kind?"
-
-"Because it's mixed up with other things."
-
-"What other things?"
-
-"Well, measles, and whooping-cough, and erysiplas, and consumption,
-and yaller janders, and brain-fever, and I don't know what all."
-
-"My land! And they call it the _mumps?_"
-
-"That's what Miss Mary Jane said."
-
-"Well, what in the nation do they call it the _mumps_ for?"
-
-"Why, because it _is_ the mumps. That's what it starts with."
-
-"Well, ther' ain't no sense in it. A body might stump his toe, and
-take pison, and fall down the well, and break his neck, and bust his
-brains out, and somebody come along and ask what killed him, and some
-numskull up and say, 'Why, he stumped his _toe_.' Would ther' be any
-sense in that? _No_. And ther' ain't no sense in _this_, nuther. Is it
-ketching?"
-
-"Is it _ketching?_  Why, how you talk. Is a _harrow_ catching--in the
-dark? If you don't hitch on to one tooth, you're bound to on another,
-ain't you? And you can't get away with that tooth without fetching the
-whole harrow along, can you? Well, these kind of mumps is a kind of a
-harrow, as you may say--and it ain't no slouch of a harrow, nuther,
-you come to get it hitched on good."
-
-"Well, it's awful, I think," says the hare-lip. "I'll go to Uncle
-Harvey and--"
-
-"Oh, yes," I says, "I _would._ Of _course_ I would. I wouldn't lose no
-time."
-
-"Well, why wouldn't you?"
-
-"Just look at it a minute, and maybe you can see. Hain't your uncles
-obleeged to get along home to England as fast as they can? And do you
-reckon they'd be mean enough to go off and leave you to go all that
-journey by yourselves? _You_ know they'll wait for you. So fur, so
-good. Your uncle Harvey's a preacher, ain't he? Very well, then; is a
-_preacher_ going to deceive a steamboat clerk? is he going to deceive
-a _ship clerk?_--so as to get them to let Miss Mary Jane go aboard?
-Now _you_ know he ain't. What _will_ he do, then? Why, he'll say,
-'It's a great pity, but my church matters has got to get along the
-best way they can; for my niece has been exposed to the dreadful
-pluribus-unum mumps, and so it's my bounden duty to set down here and
-wait the three months it takes to show on her if she's got it.' But
-never mind, if you think it's best to tell your uncle Harvey--"
-
-"Shucks, and stay fooling around here when we could all be having good
-times in England whilst we was waiting to find out whether Mary Jane's
-got it or not? Why, you talk like a muggins."
-
-"Well, anyway, maybe you'd better tell some of the neighbors."
-
-"Listen at that, now. You do beat all for natural stupidness. Can't
-you _see_ that _they'd_ go and tell? Ther' ain't no way but just to
-not tell anybody at _all_."
-
-"Well, maybe you're right--yes, I judge you _are_ right."
-
-"But I reckon we ought to tell Uncle Harvey she's gone out awhile,
-anyway, so he won't be uneasy about her?"
-
-"Yes, Miss Mary Jane she wanted you to do that. She says, 'Tell them
-to give Uncle Harvey and William my love and a kiss, and say I've run
-over the river to see Mr.'--Mr.--what _is_ the name of that rich
-family your uncle Peter used to think so much of?--I mean the one
-that--"
-
-"Why, you must mean the Apthorps, ain't it?"
-
-"Of course; bother them kind of names, a body can't ever seem to
-remember them, half the time, somehow. Yes, she said, say she has run
-over for to ask the Apthorps to be sure and come to the auction and
-buy this house, because she allowed her uncle Peter would ruther they
-had it than anybody else; and she's going to stick to them till they
-say they'll come, and then, if she ain't too tired, she's coming home;
-and if she is, she'll be home in the morning anyway. She said, don't
-say nothing about the Proctors, but only about the Apthorps--which 'll
-be perfectly true, because she is going there to speak about their
-buying the house; I know it, because she told me so herself."
-
-"All right," they said, and cleared out to lay for their uncles, and
-give them the love and the kisses, and tell them the message.
-
-Everything was all right now. The girls wouldn't say nothing because
-they wanted to go to England; and the king and the duke would ruther
-Mary Jane was off working for the auction than around in reach of
-Doctor Robinson. I felt very good; I judged I had done it pretty
-neat--I reckoned Tom Sawyer couldn't 'a' done it no neater himself. Of
-course he would 'a' throwed more style into it, but I can't do that
-very handy, not being brung up to it.
-
-Well, they held the auction in the public square, along towards the
-end of the afternoon, and it strung along, and strung along, and the
-old man he was on hand and looking his level pisonest, up there
-longside of the auctioneer, and chipping in a little Scripture now and
-then, or a little goody-goody saying of some kind, and the duke he was
-around goo-gooing for sympathy all he knowed how, and just spreading
-himself generly.
-
-But by and by the thing dragged through, and everything was
-sold--everything but a little old trifling lot in the graveyard. So
-they'd got to work _that_ off--I never see such a girafft as the king
-was for wanting to swallow _everything_. Well, whilst they was at it a
-steamboat landed, and in about two minutes up comes a crowd a-whooping
-and yelling and laughing and carrying on, and singing out:
-
-"_Here's_ your opposition line! here's your two sets o' heirs to old
-Peter Wilks--and you pays your money and you takes your choice!"
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXIX
-
-
-They was fetching a very nice-looking old gentleman along, and a
-nice-looking younger one, with his right arm in a sling. And, my
-souls, how the people yelled and laughed, and kept it up. But I didn't
-see no joke about it, and I judged it would strain the duke and the
-king some to see any. I reckoned they'd turn pale. But no, nary a pale
-did _they_ turn. The duke he never let on he suspicioned what was up,
-but just went a goo-gooing around, happy and satisfied, like a jug
-that's googling out buttermilk; and as for the king, he just gazed and
-gazed down sorrowful on them new-comers like it give him the
-stomach-ache in his very heart to think there could be such frauds and
-rascals in the world. Oh, he done it admirable. Lots of the principal
-people gethered around the king, to let him see they was on his side.
-That old gentleman that had just come looked all puzzled to death.
-Pretty soon he begun to speak, and I see straight off he pronounced
-_like_ an Englishman--not the king's way, though the king's _was_
-pretty good for an imitation. I can't give the old gent's words, nor I
-can't imitate him; but he turned around to the crowd, and says, about
-like this:
-
-"This is a surprise to me which I wasn't looking for; and I'll
-acknowledge, candid and frank, I ain't very well fixed to meet it and
-answer it; for my brother and me has had misfortunes; he's broke his
-arm, and our baggage got put off at a town above here last night in
-the night by a mistake. I am Peter Wilks's brother Harvey, and this is
-his brother William, which can't hear nor speak--and can't even make
-signs to amount to much, now't he's only got one hand to work them
-with. We are who we say we are; and in a day or two, when I get the
-baggage, I can prove it. But up till then I won't say nothing more,
-but go to the hotel and wait."
-
-So him and the new dummy started off; and the king he laughs, and
-blethers out:
-
-"Broke his arm--_very_ likely, _ain't_ it?--and very convenient, too,
-for a fraud that's got to make signs, and ain't learnt how. Lost their
-baggage! That's _mighty_ good!--and mighty ingenious--under the
-_circumstances!_"
-
-So he laughed again; and so did everybody else, except three or four,
-or maybe half a dozen. One of these was that doctor; another one was a
-sharp-looking gentleman, with a carpet-bag of the old-fashioned kind
-made out of carpet-stuff, that had just come off of the steamboat and
-was talking to him in a low voice, and glancing towards the king now
-and then and nodding their heads--it was Levi Bell, the lawyer that
-was gone up to Louisville; and another one was a big rough husky that
-come along and listened to all the old gentlemen said, and was
-listening to the king now. And when the king got done this husky up
-and says:
-
-"Say, looky here; if you are Harvey Wilks, when'd you come to this
-town?"
-
-"The day before the funeral, friend," says the king.
-
-"But what time o' day?"
-
-"In the evenin'--'bout an hour er two before sundown."
-
-"How'd you come?"
-
-"I come down on the _Susan Powell_ from Cincinnati."
-
-"Well, then, how'd you come to be up at the Pint in the _mornin_'--in
-a canoe?"
-
-"I warn't up at the Pint in the mornin'."
-
-"It's a lie."
-
-Several of them jumped for him and begged him not to talk that way to
-an old man and a preacher.
-
-"Preacher be hanged, he's a fraud and a liar. He was up at the Pint
-that mornin'. I live up there, don't I?  Well, I was up there, and he
-was up there. I see him there. He come in a canoe, along with Tim
-Collins and a boy."
-
-The doctor he up and says:
-
-"Would you know the boy again if you was to see him, Hines?"
-
-"I reckon I would, but I don't know. Why, yonder he is, now. I know
-him perfectly easy."
-
-It was me he pointed at. The doctor says:
-
-"Neighbors, I don't know whether the new couple is frauds or not; but
-if _these_ two ain't frauds, I am an idiot, that's all. I think it's
-our duty to see that they don't get away from here till we've looked
-into this thing. Come along, Hines; come along, the rest of you. We'll
-take these fellows to the tavern and affront them with t'other couple,
-and I reckon we'll find out _something_ before we get through."
-
-It was nuts for the crowd, though maybe not for the king's friends; so
-we all started. It was about sundown. The doctor he led me along by
-the hand, and was plenty kind enough, but he never let go my hand.
-
-We all got in a big room in the hotel, and lit up some candles, and
-fetched in the new couple. First, the doctor says:
-
-"I don't wish to be too hard on these two men, but I think they're
-frauds, and they may have complices that we don't know nothing about.
-If they have, won't the complices get away with that bag of gold Peter
-Wilks left? It ain't unlikely.  If these men ain't frauds, they won't
-object to sending for that money and letting us keep it till they
-prove they're all right--ain't that so?"
-
-Everybody agreed to that. So I judged they had our gang in a pretty
-tight place right at the outstart. But the king he only looked
-sorrowful, and says:
-
-"Gentlemen, I wish the money was there, for I ain't got no disposition
-to throw anything in the way of a fair, open, out-and-out
-investigation o' this misable business; but, alas, the money ain't
-there; you k'n send and see, if you want to."
-
-"Where is it, then?"
-
-"Well, when my niece give it to me to keep for her I took and hid it
-inside o' the straw tick o' my bed, not wishin' to bank it for the few
-days we'd be here, and considerin' the bed a safe place, we not bein'
-used to niggers, and suppos'n' 'em honest, like servants in England.
-The niggers stole it the very next mornin' after I had went
-down-stairs; and when I sold 'em I hadn't missed the money yit, so
-they got clean away with it. My servant here k'n tell you 'bout it,
-gentlemen."
-
-The doctor and several said "Shucks!" and I see nobody didn't
-altogether believe him. One man asked me if I see the niggers steal
-it. I said no, but I see them sneaking out of the room and hustling
-away, and I never thought nothing, only I reckoned they was afraid
-they had waked up my master and was trying to get away before he made
-trouble with them. That was all they asked me. Then the doctor whirls
-on me and says:
-
-"Are _you_ English, too?"
-
-I says yes; and him and some others laughed, and said, "Stuff!"
-
-Well, then they sailed in on the general investigation, and there we
-had it, up and down, hour in, hour out, and nobody never said a word
-about supper, nor ever seemed to think about it--and so they kept it
-up, and kept it up; and it _was_ the worst mixed-up thing you ever
-see. They made the king tell his yarn, and they made the old gentleman
-tell his'n; and anybody but a lot of prejudiced chuckleheads would 'a'
-_seen_ that the old gentleman was spinning truth and t'other one lies.
-And by and by they had me up to tell what I knowed. The king he give
-me a left-handed look out of the corner of his eye, and so I knowed
-enough to talk on the right side. I begun to tell about Sheffield, and
-how we lived there, and all about the English Wilkses, and so on; but
-I didn't get pretty fur till the doctor begun to laugh; and Levi Bell,
-the lawyer, says:
-
-"Set down, my boy; I wouldn't strain myself if I was you. I reckon you
-ain't used to lying, it don't seem to come handy; what you want is
-practice. You do it pretty awkward."
-
-I didn't care nothing for the compliment, but I was glad to be let
-off, anyway.
-
-The doctor he started to say something, and turns and says:
-
-"If you'd been in town at first, Levi Bell--"
-
-The king broke in and reached out his hand, and says:
-
-"Why, is this my poor dead brother's old friend that he's wrote so
-often about?"
-
-The lawyer and him shook hands, and the lawyer smiled and looked
-pleased, and they talked right along awhile, and then got to one side
-and talked low; and at last the lawyer speaks up and says:
-
-"That 'll fix it. I'll take the order and send it, along with your
-brother's, and then they'll know it's all right."
-
-So they got some paper and a pen, and the king he set down and twisted
-his head to one side, and chawed his tongue, and scrawled off
-something; and then they give the pen to the duke--and then for the
-first time the duke looked sick. But he took the pen and wrote. So
-then the lawyer turns to the new old gentleman and says:
-
-"You and your brother please write a line or two and sign your names."
-
-The old gentleman wrote, but nobody couldn't read it. The lawyer
-looked powerful astonished, and says:
-
-"Well, it beats _me_--and snaked a lot of old letters out of his
-pocket, and examined them, and then examined the old man's writing,
-and then _them_ again; and then says: "These old letters is from
-Harvey Wilks; and here's _these_ two handwritings, and anybody can see
-_they_ didn't write them" (the king and the duke looked sold and
-foolish, I tell you, to see how the lawyer had took them in), "and
-here's _this_ old gentleman's handwriting, and anybody can tell, easy
-enough, _he_ didn't write them--fact is, the scratches he makes ain't
-properly _writing_ at all. Now, here's some letters from--"
-
-The new old gentleman says:
-
-"If you please, let me explain. Nobody can read my hand but my brother
-there--so he copies for me. It's _his_ hand you've got there, not
-mine."
-
-"_Well!_" says the lawyer, "this _is_ a state of things. I've got some
-of William's letters, too; so if you'll get him to write a line or so
-we can com--"
-
-"He _can't_ write with his left hand," says the old gentleman. "If he
-could use his right hand, you would see that he wrote his own letters
-and mine too. Look at both, please--they're by the same hand."
-
-The lawyer done it, and says:
-
-"I believe it's so--and if it ain't so, there's a heap stronger
-resemblance than I'd noticed before, anyway. Well, well, well! I
-thought we was right on the track of a slution, but it's gone to
-grass, partly. But anyway, _one_ thing is proved--_these_ two ain't
-either of 'em Wilkses"--and he wagged his head towards the king and
-the duke.
-
-Well, what do you think? That mule-headed old fool wouldn't give in
-_then!_ Indeed he wouldn't. Said it warn't no fair test. Said his
-brother William was the cussedest joker in the world, and hadn't
-_tried_ to write--_he_ see William was going to play one of his jokes
-the minute he put the pen to paper. And so he warmed up and went
-warbling right along till he was actuly beginning to believe what he
-was saying _himself_; but pretty soon the new gentleman broke in, and
-says:
-
-"I've thought of something. Is there anybody here that helped to lay
-out my br--helped to lay out the late Peter Wilks for burying?"
-
-"Yes," says somebody, "me and Ab Turner done it. We're both here."
-
-Then the old man turns toward the king, and says:
-
-"Peraps this gentleman can tell me what was tattooed on his breast?"
-
-Blamed if the king didn't have to brace up mighty quick, or he'd 'a'
-squshed down like a bluff bank that the river has cut under, it took
-him so sudden; and, mind you, it was a thing that was calculated to
-make most _anybody_ sqush to get fetched such a solid one as that
-without any notice, because how was _he_ going to know what was
-tattooed on the man?  He whitened a little; he couldn't help it; and
-it was mighty still in there, and everybody bending a little forwards
-and gazing at him. Says I to myself, _Now_ he'll throw up the
-sponge--there ain't no more use. Well, did he? A body can't hardly
-believe it, but he didn't. I reckon he thought he'd keep the thing up
-till he tired them people out, so they'd thin out, and him and the
-duke could break loose and get away. Anyway, he set there, and pretty
-soon he begun to smile, and says:
-
-"Mf! It's a _very_ tough question, _ain't_ it! _Yes_, sir, I k'n tell
-you what's tattooed on his breast. It's jest a small, thin, blue
-arrow--that's what it is; and if you don't look clost, you can't see
-it. _Now_ what do you say--hey?"
-
-Well, _I_ never see anything like that old blister for clean
-out-and-out cheek.
-
-The new old gentleman turns brisk towards Ab Turner and his pard, and
-his eye lights up like he judged he'd got the king _this_ time, and
-says:
-
-"There--you've heard what he said! Was there any such mark on Peter
-Wilks's breast?"
-
-Both of them spoke up and says:
-
-"We didn't see no such mark."
-
-"Good!" says the old gentleman. "Now, what you _did_ see on his breast
-was a small dim P, and a B (which is an initial he dropped when he was
-young), and a W, and dashes between them, so: P--B--W"--and he marked
-them that way on a piece of paper. "Come, ain't that what you saw?"
-
-Both of them spoke up again, and says:
-
-"No, we _didn't_. We never seen any marks at all."
-
-Well, everybody _was_ in a state of mind now, and they sings out:
-
-"The whole _bilin'_ of 'm 's frauds! Le's duck 'em! le's drown 'em!
-le's ride 'em on a rail!" and everybody was whooping at once, and
-there was a rattling powwow. But the lawyer he jumps on the table and
-yells, and says:
-
-"Gentlemen--gentle_men!_ Hear me just a word--just a _single_ word--if
-you PLEASE! There's one way yet--let's go and dig up the corpse and
-look."
-
-That took them.
-
-"Hooray!" they all shouted, and was starting right off; but the lawyer
-and the doctor sung out:
-
-"Hold on, hold on! Collar all these four men and the boy, and fetch
-_them_ along, too!"
-
-"We'll do it!" they all shouted; "and if we don't find them marks
-we'll lynch the whole gang!"
-
-I _was_ scared, now, I tell you. But there warn't no getting away, you
-know. They gripped us all, and marched us right along, straight for
-the graveyard, which was a mile and a half down the river, and the
-whole town at our heels, for we made noise enough, and it was only
-nine in the evening.
-
-As we went by our house I wished I hadn't sent Mary Jane out of town;
-because now if I could tip her the wink she'd light out and save me,
-and blow on our dead-beats.
-
-Well, we swarmed along down the river road, just carrying on like
-wildcats; and to make it more scary the sky was darking up, and the
-lightning beginning to wink and flitter, and the wind to shiver
-amongst the leaves. This was the most awful trouble and most
-dangersome I ever was in; and I was kinder stunned; everything was
-going so different from what I had allowed for; stead of being fixed
-so I could take my own time if I wanted to, and see all the fun, and
-have Mary Jane at my back to save me and set me free when the
-close-fit come, here was nothing in the world betwixt me and sudden
-death but just them tattoo-marks. If they didn't find them--
-
-I couldn't bear to think about it; and yet, somehow, I couldn't think
-about nothing else. It got darker and darker, and it was a beautiful
-time to give the crowd the slip; but that big husky had me by the
-wrist--Hines--and a body might as well try to give Goliar the slip. He
-dragged me right along, he was so excited, and I had to run to keep
-up.
-
-When they got there they swarmed into the graveyard and washed over it
-like an overflow. And when they got to the grave they found they had
-about a hundred times as many shovels as they wanted, but nobody
-hadn't thought to fetch a lantern. But they sailed into digging anyway
-by the flicker of the lightning, and sent a man to the nearest house,
-a half a mile off, to borrow one.
-
-So they dug and dug like everything; and it got awful dark, and the
-rain started, and the wind swished and swushed along, and the
-lightning come brisker and brisker, and the thunder boomed; but them
-people never took no notice of it, they was so full of this business;
-and one minute you could see everything and every face in that big
-crowd, and the shovelfuls of dirt sailing up out of the grave, and the
-next second the dark wiped it all out, and you couldn't see nothing at
-all.
-
-At last they got out the coffin and begun to unscrew the lid, and then
-such another crowding and shouldering and shoving as there was, to
-scrouge in and get a sight, you never see; and in the dark, that way,
-it was awful. Hines he hurt my wrist dreadful pulling and tugging so,
-and I reckon he clean forgot I was in the world, he was so excited and
-panting.
-
-All of a sudden the lightning let go a perfect sluice of white glare,
-and somebody sings out:
-
-"By the living jingo, here's the bag of gold on his breast!"
-
-Hines let out a whoop, like everybody else, and dropped my wrist and
-give a big surge to bust his way in and get a look, and the way I lit
-out and shinned for the road in the dark there ain't nobody can tell.
-
-I had the road all to myself, and I fairly flew--leastways, I had it
-all to myself except the solid dark, and the now-and-then glares, and
-the buzzing of the rain, and the thrashing of the wind, and the
-splitting of the thunder; and sure as you are born I did clip it
-along!
-
-When I struck the town I see there warn't nobody out in the storm, so
-I never hunted for no back streets, but humped it straight through the
-main one; and when I begun to get towards our house I aimed my eye and
-set it. No light there; the house all dark--which made me feel sorry
-and disappointed, I didn't know why. But at last, just as I was
-sailing by, _flash_ comes the light in Mary Jane's window! and my
-heart swelled up sudden, like to bust; and the same second the house
-and all was behind me in the dark, and wasn't ever going to be before
-me no more in this world. She _was_ the best girl I ever see, and had
-the most sand.
-
-The minute I was far enough above the town to see I could make the
-towhead, I begun to look sharp for a boat to borrow, and the first
-time the lightning showed me one that wasn't chained I snatched it and
-shoved. It was a canoe, and warn't fastened with nothing but a rope.
-The towhead was a rattling big distance off, away out there in the
-middle of the river, but I didn't lose no time; and when I struck the
-raft at last I was so fagged I would 'a' just laid down to blow and
-gasp if I could afforded it. But I didn't. As I sprung aboard I sung
-out:
-
-"Out with you, Jim, and set her loose! Glory be to goodness, we're
-shut of them!"
-
-Jim lit out, and was a-coming for me with both arms spread, he was so
-full of joy; but when I glimpsed him in the lightning my heart shot up
-in my mouth and I went overboard backwards; for I forgot he was old
-King Lear and a drownded A-rab all in one, and it most scared the
-livers and lights out of me. But Jim fished me out, and was going to
-hug me and bless me, and so on, he was so glad I was back and we was
-shut of the king and the duke, but I says:
-
-"Not now; have it for breakfast, have it for breakfast! Cut loose and
-let her slide!"
-
-So in two seconds away we went a-sliding down the river, and it _did_
-seem so good to be free again and all by ourselves on the big river,
-and nobody to bother us. I had to skip around a bit, and jump up and
-crack my heels a few times--I couldn't help it; but about the third
-crack I noticed a sound that I knowed mighty well, and held my breath
-and listened and waited; and sure enough, when the next flash busted
-out over the water, here they come!--and just a-laying to their oars
-and making their skiff hum! It was the king and the duke.
-
-So I wilted right down onto the planks then, and give up; and it was
-all I could do to keep from crying.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXX
-
-
-When they got aboard the king went for me, and shook me by the collar,
-and says:
-
-"Tryin' to give us the slip, was ye, you pup! Tired of our company,
-hey?"
-
-I says:
-
-"No, your majesty, we warn't--_please_ don't, your majesty!"
-
-"Quick, then, and tell us what _was_ your idea, or I'll shake the
-insides out o' you!"
-
-"Honest, I'll tell you everything just as it happened, your majesty.
-The man that had a-holt of me was very good to me, and kept saying he
-had a boy about as big as me that died last year, and he was sorry to
-see a boy in such a dangerous fix; and when they was all took by
-surprise by finding the gold, and made a rush for the coffin, he lets
-go of me and whispers, 'Heel it now, or they'll hang ye, sure!' and I
-lit out. It didn't seem no good for _me_ to stay--I couldn't do
-nothing, and I didn't want to be _hung_ if I could get away. So I
-never stopped running till I found the canoe; and when I got here I
-told Jim to hurry, or they'd catch me and hang me yet, and said I was
-afeard you and the duke wasn't alive now, and I was awful sorry, and
-so was Jim, and was awful glad when we see you coming; you may ask Jim
-if I didn't." Jim said it was so; and the king told him to shut up,
-and said, "Oh, yes, it's _mighty_ likely!" and shook me up again, and
-said he reckoned he'd drownd me. But the duke says:
-
-"Leggo the boy, you old idiot! Would _you_ 'a' done any different?
-Did you inquire around for _him_ when you got loose? I don't remember
-it."
-
-So the king let go of me, and begun to cuss that town and everybody in
-it. But the duke says:
-
-"You better a blame' sight give _yourself_ a good cussing, for you're
-the one that's entitled to it most. You hain't done a thing from the
-start that had any sense in it, except coming out so cool and cheeky
-with that imaginary blue-arrow mark. That _was_ bright--it was right
-down bully; and it was the thing that saved us. For if it hadn't been
-for that they'd 'a' jailed us till them Englishmen's baggage come--and
-then--the penitentiary, you bet! But that trick took 'em to the
-graveyard, and the gold done us a still bigger kindness; for if the
-excited fools hadn't let go all holts and made that rush to get a look
-we'd 'a' slept in our cravats to-night--cravats warranted to _wear_,
-too--longer than _we'd_ need 'em."
-
-They was still a minute--thinking; then the king says, kind of
-absent-minded like:
-
-"Mf! And we reckoned the _niggers_ stole it!"
-
-That made me squirm!
-
-"Yes," says the duke, kinder slow and deliberate and sarcastic, "_we_
-did."
-
-After about a half a minute the king drawls out:
-
-"Leastways, I did."
-
-The duke says, the same way:
-
-"On the contrary, _I_ did."
-
-The king kind of ruffles up, and says:
-
-"Looky here, Bilgewater, what'r you referrin' to?" The duke says,
-pretty brisk:
-
-"When it comes to that, maybe you'll let me ask what was _you_
-referring to?"
-
-"Shucks!" says the king, very sarcastic; "but _I_ don't know--maybe
-you was asleep, and didn't know what you was about."
-
-The duke bristles up now, and says:
-
-"Oh, let _up_ on this cussed nonsense; do you take me for a blame'
-fool? Don't you reckon I know who hid that money in that coffin?"
-
-"_Yes_, sir! I know you _do_ know, because you done it yourself!"
-
-"It's a lie!"--and the duke went for him. The king sings out:
-
-"Take y'r hands off!--leggo my throat!--I take it all back!"
-
-The duke says:
-
-"Well, you just own up, first, that you _did_ hide that money there,
-intending to give me the slip one of these days, and come back and dig
-it up, and have it all to yourself."
-
-"Wait jest a minute, duke--answer me this one question, honest and
-fair; if you didn't put the money there, say it, and I'll b'lieve you,
-and take back everything I said."
-
-"You old scoundrel, I didn't, and you know I didn't. There, now!"
-
-"Well, then, I b'lieve you. But answer me only jest this one more--now
-_don't_ git mad; didn't you have it in your mind to hook the money and
-hide it?"
-
-The duke never said nothing for a little bit; then he says:
-
-"Well, I don't care if I _did_, I didn't _do_ it, anyway. But you not
-only had it in mind to do it, but you _done_ it."
-
-"I wisht I never die if I done it, duke, and that's honest. I won't
-say I warn't goin' to do it, because I _was_; but you--I mean
-somebody--got in ahead o' me."
-
-"It's a lie! You done it, and you got to _say_ you done it, or--"
-
-The king began to gurgle, and then he gasps out:
-
-"'Nough!--I _own up!_"
-
-I was very glad to hear him say that; it made me feel much more easier
-than what I was feeling before. So the duke took his hands off and
-says:
-
-"If you ever deny it again I'll drown you. It's _well_ for you to set
-there and blubber like a baby--it's fitten for you, after the way
-you've acted. I never see such an old ostrich for wanting to gobble
-everything--and I a-trusting you all the time, like you was my own
-father. You ought to been ashamed of yourself to stand by and hear it
-saddled on to a lot of poor niggers, and you never say a word for 'em.
-It makes me feel ridiculous to think I was soft enough to _believe_
-that rubbage. Cuss you, I can see now why you was so anxious to make
-up the deffisit--you wanted to get what money I'd got out of the
-'None-such' and one thing or another, and scoop it _all!_"
-
-The king says, timid, and still a-snuffling:
-
-"Why, duke, it was you that said make up the deffersit; it warn't me."
-
-"Dry up! I don't want to hear no more out of you!" says the duke. "And
-_now_ you see what you _got_ by it. They've got all their own money
-back, and all of _ourn_ but a shekel or two _besides_. G'long to bed,
-and don't you deffersit _me_ no more deffersits, long 's _you_ live!"
-
-So the king sneaked into the wigwam and took to his bottle for
-comfort, and before long the duke tackled _his_ bottle; and so in
-about a half an hour they was as thick as thieves again, and the
-tighter they got the lovinger they got, and went off a-snoring in each
-other's arms. They both got powerful mellow, but I noticed the king
-didn't get mellow enough to forget to remember to not deny about
-hiding the money-bag again. That made me feel easy and satisfied. Of
-course when they got to snoring we had a long gabble, and I told Jim
-everything.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXI
-
-
-We dasn't stop again at any town for days and days; kept right along
-down the river. We was down south in the warm weather now, and a
-mighty long ways from home. We begun to come to trees with Spanish
-moss on them, hanging down from the limbs like long, gray beards. It
-was the first I ever see it growing, and it made the woods look solemn
-and dismal. So now the frauds reckoned they was out of danger, and
-they begun to work the villages again.
-
-First they done a lecture on temperance; but they didn't make enough
-for them both to get drunk on. Then in another village they started a
-dancing-school; but they didn't know no more how to dance than a
-kangaroo does; so the first prance they made the general public jumped
-in and pranced them out of town. Another time they tried to go at
-yellocution; but they didn't yellocute long till the audience got up
-and give them a solid good cussing, and made them skip out. They
-tackled missionarying, and mesmerizing, and doctoring, and telling
-fortunes, and a little of everything; but they couldn't seem to have
-no luck. So at last they got just about dead broke, and laid around
-the raft as she floated along, thinking and thinking, and never saying
-nothing, by the half a day at a time, and dreadful blue and desperate.
-
-And at last they took a change and begun to lay their heads together
-in the wigwam and talk low and confidential two or three hours at a
-time. Jim and me got uneasy. We didn't like the look of it. We judged
-they was studying up some kind of worse deviltry than ever. We turned
-it over and over, and at last we made up our minds they was going to
-break into somebody's house or store, or was going into the
-counterfeit-money business, or something. So then we was pretty
-scared, and made up an agreement that we wouldn't have nothing in the
-world to do with such actions, and if we ever got the least show we
-would give them the cold shake and clear out and leave them behind.
-Well, early one morning we hid the raft in a good, safe place about
-two mile below a little bit of a shabby village named Pikesville, and
-the king he went ashore and told us all to stay hid whilst he went up
-to town and smelt around to see if anybody had got any wind of the
-"Royal Nonesuch" there yet. ("House to rob, you _mean_," says I to
-myself; "and when you get through robbing it you'll come back here and
-wonder what has become of me and Jim and the raft--and you'll have to
-take it out in wondering.") And he said if he warn't back by midday
-the duke and me would know it was all right, and we was to come along.
-
-So we stayed where we was. The duke he fretted and sweated around, and
-was in a mighty sour way. He scolded us for everything, and we
-couldn't seem to do nothing right; he found fault with every little
-thing. Something was a-brewing, sure. I was good and glad when midday
-come and no king; we could have a change, anyway--and maybe a chance
-for _the_ chance on top of it. So me and the duke went up to the
-village, and hunted around there for the king, and by and by we found
-him in the back room of a little low doggery, very tight, and a lot of
-loafers bullyragging him for sport, and he a-cussing and a-threatening
-with all his might, and so tight he couldn't walk, and couldn't do
-nothing to them. The duke he begun to abuse him for an old fool, and
-the king begun to sass back, and the minute they was fairly at it I
-lit out and shook the reefs out of my hind legs, and spun down the
-river road like a deer, for I see our chance; and I made up my mind
-that it would be a long day before they ever see me and Jim again. I
-got down there all out of breath but loaded up with joy, and sung out:
-
-"Set her loose, Jim; we're all right now!"
-
-But there warn't no answer, and nobody come out of the wigwam. Jim was
-gone! I set up a shout--and then another--and then another one; and
-run this way and that in the woods, whooping and screeching; but it
-warn't no use--old Jim was gone. Then I set down and cried; I couldn't
-help it. But I couldn't set still long. Pretty soon I went out on the
-road, trying to think what I better do, and I run across a boy
-walking, and asked him if he'd seen a strange nigger dressed so and
-so, and he says:
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Whereabouts?" says I.
-
-"Down to Silas Phelps's place, two mile below here. He's a runaway
-nigger, and they've got him. Was you looking for him?"
-
-"You bet I ain't! I run across him in the woods about an hour or two
-ago, and he said if I hollered he'd cut my livers out--and told me to
-lay down and stay where I was; and I done it. Been there ever since;
-afeard to come out."
-
-"Well," he says, "you needn't be afeard no more, becuz they've got
-him. He run off f'm down South som'ers."
-
-"It's a good job they got him."
-
-"Well, I _reckon!_ There's two hundred dollars dollars' reward on him.
-It's like picking up money out'n the road."
-
-"Yes, it is--and I could 'a' had it if I'd been big enough; I see him
-_first_. Who nailed him?"
-
-"It was an old fellow--a stranger--and he sold out his chance in him
-for forty dollars, becuz he's got to go up the river and can't wait.
-Think o' that, now! You bet _I'd_ wait, if it was seven year."
-
-"That's me, every time," says I. "But maybe his chance ain't worth no
-more than that, if he'll sell it so cheap. Maybe there's something
-ain't straight about it."
-
-"But it _is_, though--straight as a string. I see the handbill myself.
-It tells all about him, to a dot--paints him like a picture, and tells
-the plantation he's frum, below Newr_leans_. No-sirree-_bob_, they
-ain't no trouble 'bout _that_ speculation, you bet you. Say, gimme a
-chaw tobacker, won't ye?"
-
-I didn't have none, so he left. I went to the raft, and set down in
-the wigwam to think. But I couldn't come to nothing. I thought till I
-wore my head sore, but I couldn't see no way out of the trouble. After
-all this long journey, and after all we'd done for them scoundrels,
-here it was all come to nothing, everything all busted up and ruined,
-because they could have the heart to serve Jim such a trick as that,
-and make him a slave again all his life, and amongst strangers, too,
-for forty dirty dollars.
-
-Once I said to myself it would be a thousand times better for Jim to
-be a slave at home where his family was, as long as he'd _got_ to be a
-slave, and so I'd better write a letter to Tom Sawyer and tell him to
-tell Miss Watson where he was. But I soon give up that notion for two
-things: she'd be mad and disgusted at his rascality and ungratefulness
-for leaving her, and so she'd sell him straight down the river again;
-and if she didn't, everybody naturally despises an ungrateful nigger,
-and they'd make Jim feel it all the time, and so he'd feel ornery and
-disgraced. And then think of _me!_ It would get all around that Huck
-Finn helped a nigger to get his freedom; and if I was ever to see
-anybody from that town again I'd be ready to get down and lick his
-boots for shame. That's just the way: a person does a low-down thing,
-and then he don't want to take no consequences of it. Thinks as long
-as he can hide, it ain't no disgrace. That was my fix exactly. The
-more I studied about this the more my conscience went to grinding me,
-and the more wicked and low-down and ornery I got to feeling. And at
-last, when it hit me all of a sudden that here was the plain hand of
-Providence slapping me in the face and letting me know my wickedness
-was being watched all the time from up there in heaven, whilst I was
-stealing a poor old woman's nigger that hadn't ever done me no harm,
-and now was showing me there's One that's always on the lookout, and
-ain't a-going to allow no such miserable doings to go only just so fur
-and no further, I most dropped in my tracks I was so scared.  Well, I
-tried the best I could to kinder soften it up somehow for myself by
-saying I was brung up wicked, and so I warn't so much to blame; but
-something inside of me kept saying, "There was the Sunday-school, you
-could 'a' gone to it; and if you'd 'a' done it they'd 'a' learnt you
-there that people that acts as I'd been acting about that nigger goes
-to everlasting fire."
-
-It made me shiver. And I about made up my mind to pray, and see if I
-couldn't try to quit being the kind of a boy I was and be better. So I
-kneeled down. But the words wouldn't come. Why wouldn't they? It
-warn't no use to try and hide it from Him. Nor from _me_, neither. I
-knowed very well why they wouldn't come. It was because my heart
-warn't right; it was because I warn't square; it was because I was
-playing double. I was letting _on_ to give up sin, but away inside of
-me I was holding on to the biggest one of all. I was trying to make my
-mouth _say_ I would do the right thing and the clean thing, and go and
-write to that nigger's owner and tell where he was; but deep down in
-me I knowed it was a lie, and He knowed it. You can't pray a lie--I
-found that out.
-
-So I was full of trouble, full as I could be; and didn't know what to
-do. At last I had an idea; and I says, I'll go and write the
-letter--and then see if I can pray. Why, it was astonishing, the way I
-felt as light as a feather right straight off, and my troubles all
-gone. So I got a piece of paper and a pencil, all glad and excited,
-and set down and wrote:
-
-Miss Watson, your runaway nigger Jim is down here two mile below
-Pikesville, and Mr. Phelps has got him and he will give him up for the
-reward if you send. HUCK FINN.
-
-I felt good and all washed clean of sin for the first time I had ever
-felt so in my life, and I knowed I could pray now. But I didn't do it
-straight off, but laid the paper down and set there thinking--thinking
-how good it was all this happened so, and how near I come to being
-lost and going to hell. And went on thinking. And got to thinking over
-our trip down the river; and I see Jim before me all the time: in the
-day and in the night-time, sometimes moonlight, sometimes storms, and
-we a-floating along, talking and singing and laughing. But somehow I
-couldn't seem to strike no places to harden me against him, but only
-the other kind. I'd see him standing my watch on top of his'n, 'stead
-of calling me, so I could go on sleeping; and see him how glad he was
-when I come back out of the fog; and when I come to him again in the
-swamp, up there where the feud was; and such-like times; and would
-always call me honey, and pet me, and do everything he could think of
-for me, and how good he always was; and at last I struck the time I
-saved him by telling the men we had smallpox aboard, and he was so
-grateful, and said I was the best friend old Jim ever had in the
-world, and the _only_ one he's got now; and then I happened to look
-around and see that paper.
-
-It was a close place. I took it up, and held it in my hand. I was
-a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things,
-and I knowed it. I studied a minute, sort of holding my breath, and
-then says to myself:
-
-"All right, then, I'll _go_ to hell"--and tore it up. It was awful
-thoughts and awful words, but they was said. And I let them stay said;
-and never thought no more about reforming. I shoved the whole thing
-out of my head, and said I would take up wickedness again, which was
-in my line, being brung up to it, and the other warn't. And for a
-starter I would go to work and steal Jim out of slavery again; and if
-I could think up anything worse, I would do that, too; because as long
-as I was in, and in for good, I might as well go the whole hog.
-
-Then I set to thinking over how to get at it, and turned over some
-considerable many ways in my mind; and at last fixed up a plan that
-suited me. So then I took the bearings of a woody island that was down
-the river a piece, and as soon as it was fairly dark I crept out with
-my raft and went for it, and hid it there, and then turned in. I slept
-the night through, and got up before it was light, and had my
-breakfast, and put on my store clothes, and tied up some others and
-one thing or another in a bundle, and took the canoe and cleared for
-shore. I landed below where I judged was Phelps's place, and hid my
-bundle in the woods, and then filled up the canoe with water, and
-loaded rocks into her and sunk her where I could find her again when I
-wanted her, about a quarter of a mile below a little steam-sawmill
-that was on the bank.
-
-Then I struck up the road, and when I passed the mill I see a sign on
-it, "Phelps's Sawmill," and when I come to the farm-houses, two or
-three hundred yards further along, I kept my eyes peeled, but didn't
-see nobody around, though it was good daylight now. But I didn't mind,
-because I didn't want to see nobody just yet--I only wanted to get the
-lay of the land. According to my plan, I was going to turn up there
-from the village, not from below. So I just took a look, and shoved
-along, straight for town. Well, the very first man I see when I got
-there was the duke. He was sticking up a bill for the "Royal
-Nonesuch--three-night performance--like that other time. They had the
-cheek, them frauds! I was right on him before I could shirk. He looked
-astonished, and says:
-
-"Hel-_lo!_ Where'd _you_ come from?" Then he says, kind of glad and
-eager, "Where's the raft?--got her in a good place?"
-
-I says:
-
-"Why, that's just what I was going to ask your grace."
-
-Then he didn't look so joyful, and says:
-
-"What was your idea for asking _me?_" he says.
-
-"Well," I says, "when I see the king in that doggery yesterday I says
-to myself, we can't get him home for hours, till he's soberer; so I
-went a-loafing around town to put in the time and wait. A man up and
-offered me ten cents to help him pull a skiff over the river and back
-to fetch a sheep, and so I went along; but when we was dragging him to
-the boat, and the man left me a-holt of the rope and went behind him
-to shove him along, he was too strong for me and jerked loose and run,
-and we after him. We didn't have no dog, and so we had to chase him
-all over the country till we tired him out. We never got him till
-dark; then we fetched him over, and I started down for the raft. When
-I got there and see it was gone, I says to myself, 'They've got into
-trouble and had to leave; and they've took my nigger, which is the
-only nigger I've got in the world, and now I'm in a strange country,
-and ain't got no property no more, nor nothing, and no way to make my
-living'; so I set down and cried. I slept in the woods all night. But
-what _did_ become of the raft, then?--and Jim--poor Jim!"
-
-"Blamed if I know--that is, what's become of the raft. That old fool
-had made a trade and got forty dollars, and when we found him in the
-doggery the loafers had matched half-dollars with him and got every
-cent but what he'd spent for whisky; and when I got him home late last
-night and found the raft gone, we said, 'That little rascal has stole
-our raft and shook us, and run off down the river.'"
-
-"I wouldn't shake my _nigger_, would I?--the only nigger I had in the
-world, and the only property."
-
-"We never thought of that. Fact is, I reckon we'd come to consider him
-_our_ nigger; yes, we did consider him so--goodness knows we had
-trouble enough for him. So when we see the raft was gone and we flat
-broke, there warn't anything for it but to try the 'Royal Nonesuch'
-another shake. And I've pegged along ever since, dry as a powder-horn.
-Where's that ten cents? Give it here."
-
-I had considerable money, so I give him ten cents, but begged him to
-spend it for something to eat, and give me some, because it was all
-the money I had, and I hadn't had nothing to eat since yesterday. He
-never said nothing. The next minute he whirls on me and says:
-
-"Do you reckon that nigger would blow on us? We'd skin him if he done
-that!"
-
-"How can he blow? Hain't he run off?"
-
-"No! That old fool sold him, and never divided with me, and the
-money's gone."
-
-"_Sold_ him?" I says, and begun to cry; "why, he was _my_ nigger, and
-that was my money. Where is he?--I want my nigger."
-
-"Well, you can't _get_ your nigger, that's all--so dry up your
-blubbering. Looky here--do you think _you'd_ venture to blow on us?
-Blamed if I think I'd trust you. Why, if you _was_ to blow on us--"
-
-He stopped, but I never see the duke look so ugly out of his eyes
-before. I went on a-whimpering, and says:
-
-"I don't want to blow on nobody; and I ain't got no time to blow,
-nohow; I got to turn out and find my nigger."
-
-He looked kinder bothered, and stood there with his bills fluttering
-on his arm, thinking, and wrinkling up his forehead. At last he says:
-
-"I'll tell you something. We got to be here three days. If you'll
-promise you won't blow, and won't let the nigger blow, I'll tell you
-where to find him."
-
-So I promised, and he says:
-
-"A farmer by the name of Silas Ph--" and then he stopped. You see, he
-started to tell me the truth; but when he stopped that way, and begun
-to study and think again, I reckoned he was changing his mind. And so
-he was. He wouldn't trust me; he wanted to make sure of having me out
-of the way the whole three days. So pretty soon he says:
-
-"The man that bought him is named Abram Foster--Abram G. Foster--and
-he lives forty mile back here in the country, on the road to
-Lafayette."
-
-"All right," I says, "I can walk it in three days. And I'll start this
-very afternoon."
-
-"No you won't, you'll start _now_; and don't you lose any time about
-it, neither, nor do any gabbling by the way. Just keep a tight tongue
-in your head and move right along, and then you won't get into trouble
-with _us_, d'ye hear?"
-
-That was the order I wanted, and that was the one I played for. I
-wanted to be left free to work my plans.
-
-"So clear out," he says; "and you can tell Mr. Foster whatever you
-want to. Maybe you can get him to believe that Jim _is_ your
-nigger--some idiots don't require documents--leastways I've heard
-there's such down South here. And when you tell him the handbill and
-the reward's bogus, maybe he'll believe you when you explain to him
-what the idea was for getting 'em out. Go 'long now, and tell him
-anything you want to; but mind you don't work your jaw any _between_
-here and there."
-
-
-So I left, and struck for the back country. I didn't look around, but
-I kinder felt like he was watching me. But I knowed I could tire him
-out at that. I went straight out in the country as much as a mile
-before I stopped; then I doubled back through the woods towards
-Phelps's. I reckoned I better start in on my plan straight off without
-fooling around, because I wanted to stop Jim's mouth till these
-fellows could get away. I didn't want no trouble with their kind. I'd
-seen all I wanted to of them, and wanted to get entirely shut of them.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXII
-
-
-When I got there it was all still and Sunday-like, and hot and
-sunshiny; the hands was gone to the fields; and there was them kind of
-faint dronings of bugs and flies in the air that makes it seem so
-lonesome and like everybody's dead and gone; and if a breeze fans
-along and quivers the leaves it makes you feel mournful, because you
-feel like it's spirits whispering--spirits that's been dead ever so
-many years--and you always think they're talking about _you._ As a
-general thing it makes a body wish _he_ was dead, too, and done with
-it all.
-
-Phelps's was one of these little one-horse cotton plantations, and
-they all look alike. A rail fence round a two-acre yard; a stile made
-out of logs sawed off and up-ended in steps, like barrels of a
-different length, to climb over the fence with, and for the women to
-stand on when they are going to jump onto a horse; some sickly
-grass-patches in the big yard, but mostly it was bare and smooth, like
-an old hat with the nap rubbed off; big double log house for the white
-folks--hewed logs, with the chinks stopped up with mud or mortar, and
-these mud-stripes been whitewashed some time or another; round-log
-kitchen, with a big broad, open but roofed passage joining it to the
-house; log smokehouse back of the kitchen; three little  nigger cabins
-in a row t'other side the smokehouse; one little hut all by itself
-away down against the back fence, and some outbuildings down a piece
-the other side; ash-hopper and big kettle to bile soap in by the
-little hut; bench by the kitchen door, with bucket of water and a
-gourd; hound asleep there in the sun; more hounds asleep round about;
-about three shade trees away off in a corner; some currant bushes and
-gooseberry bushes in one place by the fence; outside of the fence a
-garden and a watermelon patch; then the cotton-fields begins, and
-after the fields the woods.
-
-I went around and clumb over the back stile by the ash-hopper, and
-started for the kitchen. When I got a little ways I heard the dim hum
-of a spinning-wheel wailing along up and sinking along down again; and
-then I knowed for certain I wished I was dead--for that _is_ the
-lonesomest sound in the whole world.
-
-I went right along, not fixing up any particular plan, but just
-trusting to Providence to put the right words in my mouth when the
-time come; for I'd noticed that Providence always did put the right
-words in my mouth if I left it alone.
-
-When I got half-way, first one hound and then another got up and went
-for me, and of course I stopped and faced them, and kept still. And
-such another powwow as they made! In a quarter of a minute I was a
-kind of a hub of a wheel, as you may say--spokes made out of
-dogs--circle of fifteen of them packed together around me, with their
-necks and noses stretched up towards me, a-barking and howling; and
-more a-coming; you could see them sailing over fences and around
-corners from every-wheres.
-
-A nigger woman come tearing out of the kitchen with a rolling-pin in
-her hand, singing out, "Begone! _you_ Tige! you Spot! begone sah!" and
-she fetched first one and then another of them a clip and sent them
-howling, and then the rest followed; and the next second half of them
-come back, wagging their tails around me, and making friends with me.
-There ain't no harm in a hound, nohow.
-
-And behind the woman comes a little nigger girl and two little nigger
-boys without anything on but tow-linen shirts, and they hung on to
-their mother's gown, and peeped out from behind her at me, bashful,
-the way they always do. And here comes the white woman running from
-the house, about forty-five or fifty year old, bareheaded, and her
-spinning-stick in her hand; and behind her comes her little white
-children, acting the same way the little niggers was going. She was
-smiling all over so she could hardly stand--and says:
-
-"It's _you_, at last!--_ain't_ it?"
-
-I out with a "Yes'm" before I thought.
-
-She grabbed me and hugged me tight; and then gripped me by both hands
-and shook and shook; and the tears come in her eyes, and run down
-over; and she couldn't seem to hug and shake enough, and kept saying,
-"You don't look as much like your mother as I reckoned you would; but
-law sakes, I don't care for that, I'm so glad to see you! Dear, dear,
-it does seem like I could eat you up! Children, it's your cousin
-Tom!--tell him howdy."
-
-But they ducked their heads, and put their fingers in their mouths,
-and hid behind her. So she run on:
-
-"Lize, hurry up and get him a hot breakfast right away--or did you get
-your breakfast on the boat?"
-
-I said I had got it on the boat. So then she started for the house,
-leading me by the hand, and the children tagging after. When we got
-there she set me down in a split-bottomed chair, and set herself down
-on a little low stool in front of me, holding both of my hands, and
-says:
-
-"Now I can have a _good_ look at you; and, laws-a-me, I've been hungry
-for it a many and a many a time, all these long years, and it's come
-at last! We been expecting you a couple of days and more. What kep'
-you?--boat get aground?"
-
-"Yes'm--she--"
-
-"Don't say yes'm--say Aunt Sally. Where'd she get aground?"
-
-I didn't rightly know what to say, because I didn't know whether the
-boat would be coming up the river or down. But I go a good deal on
-instinct; and my instinct said she would be coming up--from down
-towards Orleans. That didn't help me much, though; for I didn't know
-the names of bars down that way. I see I'd got to invent a bar, or
-forget the name of the one we got aground on--or--Now I struck an
-idea, and fetched it out:
-
-"It warn't the grounding--that didn't keep us back but a little. We
-blowed out a cylinder-head."
-
-"Good gracious! anybody hurt?"
-
-"No'm. Killed a nigger."
-
-"Well, it's lucky; because sometimes people do get hurt. Two years ago
-last Christmas your uncle Silas was coming up from Newrleans on the
-old Lally Rook, and she blowed out a cylinder-head and crippled a man.
-And I think he died afterwards. He was a Baptist. Your uncle Silas
-knowed a family in Baton Rouge that knowed his people very well. Yes,
-I remember now, he _did_ die. Mortification set in, and they had to
-amputate him. But it didn't save him. Yes, it was mortification--that
-was it. He turned blue all over, and died in the hope of a glorious
-resurrection. They say he was a sight to look at. Your uncle's been up
-to the town every day to fetch you. And he's gone again, not more'n an
-hour ago; he'll be back any minute now. You must 'a' met him on the
-road, didn't you?--oldish man, with a--"
-
-"No, I didn't see nobody, Aunt Sally. The boat landed just at
-daylight, and I left my baggage on the wharf-boat and went looking
-around the town and out a piece in the country, to put in the time and
-not get here too soon; and so I come down the back way."
-
-"Who'd you give the baggage to?"
-
-"Nobody."
-
-"Why, child, it 'll be stole!"
-
-"Not where I hid it I reckon it won't," I says.
-
-"How'd you get your breakfast so early on the boat?"
-
-It was kinder thin ice, but I says:
-
-"The captain see me standing around, and told me I better have
-something to eat before I went ashore; so he took me in the texas to
-the officers' lunch, and give me all I wanted."
-
-I was getting so uneasy I couldn't listen good. I had my mind on the
-children all the time; I wanted to get them out to one side and pump
-them a little, and find out who I was. But I couldn't get no show,
-Mrs. Phelps kept it up and run on so. Pretty soon she made the cold
-chills streak all down my back, because she says:
-
-"But here we're a-running on this way, and you hain't told me a word
-about Sis, nor any of them. Now I'll rest my works a little, and you
-start up yourn; just tell me _everything_--tell me all about 'm
-all--every one of 'm; and how they are, and what they're doing, and
-what they told you to tell me; and every last thing you can think of."
-
-Well, I see I was up a stump--and up it good. Providence had stood by
-me this fur all right, but I was hard and tight aground now. I see it
-warn't a bit of use to try to go ahead--I'd got to throw up my hand.
-So I says to myself, here's another place where I got to resk the
-truth. I opened my mouth to begin; but she grabbed me and hustled me
-in behind the bed, and says:
-
-"Here he comes! Stick your head down lower--there, that'll do; you
-can't be seen now. Don't you let on you're here. I'll play a joke on
-him. Children, don't you say a word."
-
-I see I was in a _fix_ now. But it warn't no use to worry; there
-warn't nothing to do but just hold still, and try and be ready to
-stand from under when the lightning struck.
-
-I had just one little glimpse of the old gentleman when he come in;
-then the bed hid him. Mrs. Phelps she jumps for him, and says: "Has he
-come?"
-
-"No," says her husband.
-
-"Good-_ness_ gracious!" she says, "what in the world _can_ have become
-of him?"
-
-"I can't imagine," says the old gentleman; "and I must say it makes me
-dreadful uneasy."
-
-"Uneasy!" she says; "I'm ready to go distracted! He _must_ 'a' come;
-and you've missed him along the road. I _know_ it's so--something
-tells me so."
-
-"Why, Sally, I _couldn't_ miss him along the road--_you_ know that."
-
-"But oh, dear, dear, what _will_ Sis say! He must 'a' come! You must
-'a' missed him. He--"
-
-"Oh, don't distress me any more'n I'm already distressed. I don't know
-what in the world to make of it. I'm at my wit's end, and I don't mind
-acknowledging 't I'm right down scared. But there's no hope that he's
-come; for he _couldn't_ come and me miss him. Sally, it's
-terrible--just terrible--something's happened to the boat, sure!"
-
-"Why, Silas! Look yonder!--up the road!--ain't that somebody coming?"
-
-He sprung to the window at the head of the bed, and that give
-Mrs. Phelps the chance she wanted. She stooped down quick at the foot
-of the bed and give me a pull, and out I come; and when he turned back
-from the window there she stood, a-beaming and a-smiling like a house
-afire, and I standing pretty meek and sweaty alongside. The old
-gentleman stared, and says:
-
-"Why, who's that?"
-
-"Who do you reckon 'tis?"
-
-"I hain't no idea. Who _is_ it?"
-
-"It's _Tom Sawyer!_"
-
-By jings, I most slumped through the floor! But there warn't no time
-to swap knives; the old man grabbed me by the hand and shook, and kept
-on shaking; and all the time how the woman did dance around and laugh
-and cry; and then how they both did fire off questions about Sid, and
-Mary, and the rest of the tribe.
-
-But if they was joyful, it warn't nothing to what I was; for it was
-like being born again, I was so glad to find out who I was. Well, they
-froze to me for two hours; and at last, when my chin was so tired it
-couldn't hardly go any more, I had told them more about my family--I
-mean the Sawyer family--than ever happened to any six Sawyer families.
-And I explained all about how we blowed out a cylinder-head at the
-mouth of White River, and it took us three days to fix it. Which was
-all right, and worked first-rate; because _they_ didn't know but what
-it would take three days to fix it. If I'd 'a' called it a bolthead it
-would 'a' done just as well.
-
-Now I was feeling pretty comfortable all down one side, and pretty
-uncomfortable all up the other. Being Tom Sawyer was easy and
-comfortable, and it stayed easy and comfortable till by and by I hear
-a steamboat coughing along down the river. Then I says to myself,
-s'pose Tom Sawyer comes down on that boat?  And s'pose he steps in
-here any minute, and sings out my name before I can throw him a wink
-to keep quiet?
-
-Well, I couldn't _have_ it that way; it wouldn't do at all. I must go
-up the road and waylay him. So I told the folks I reckoned I would go
-up to the town and fetch down my baggage. The old gentleman was for
-going along with me, but I said no, I could drive the horse myself,
-and I druther he wouldn't take no trouble about me.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXIII
-
-
-So I started for town in the wagon, and when I was half-way I see a
-wagon coming, and sure enough it was Tom Sawyer, and I stopped and
-waited till he come along. I says "Hold on!" and it stopped alongside,
-and his mouth opened up like a trunk, and stayed so; and he swallowed
-two or three times like a person that's got a dry throat, and then
-says:
-
-"I hain't ever done you no harm. You know that. So, then, what you
-want to come back and ha'nt _me_ for?"
-
-I says:
-
-"I hain't come back--I hain't been _gone_."
-
-When he heard my voice it righted him up some, but he warn't quite
-satisfied yet. He says:
-
-"Don't you play nothing on me, because I wouldn't on you. Honest
-injun, you ain't a ghost?"
-
-"Honest injun, I ain't," I says.
-
-"Well--I--I--well, that ought to settle it, of course; but I can't
-somehow seem to understand it no way. Looky here, warn't you ever
-murdered _at all?_"
-
-"No. I warn't ever murdered at all--I played it on them. You come in
-here and feel of me if you don't believe me."
-
-So he done it; and it satisfied him; and he was that glad to see me
-again he didn't know what to do. And he wanted to know all about it
-right off, because it was a grand adventure, and mysterious, and so it
-hit him where he lived. But I said, leave it alone till by and by; and
-told his driver to wait, and we drove off a little piece, and I told
-him the kind of a fix I was in, and what did he reckon we better do?
-He said, let him alone a minute, and don't disturb him. So he thought
-and thought, and pretty soon he says:
-
-"It's all right; I've got it. Take my trunk in your wagon, and let on
-it's your'n; and you turn back and fool along slow, so as to get to
-the house about the time you ought to; and I'll go towards town a
-piece, and take a fresh start, and get there a quarter or a half an
-hour after you; and you needn't let on to know me at first."
-
-I says:
-
-"All right; but wait a minute. There's one more thing--a thing that
-_nobody_ don't know but me. And that is, there's a nigger here that
-I'm a-trying to steal out of slavery, and his name is _Jim_--old Miss
-Watson's Jim."
-
-He says:
-
-"What! Why, Jim is--"
-
-He stopped and went to studying. I says:
-
-"_I_ know what you'll say. You'll say it's dirty, low-down business;
-but what if it is? _I_'m low down; and I'm a-going to steal him, and I
-want you keep mum and not let on. Will you?"
-
-His eye lit up, and he says:
-
-"I'll _help_ you steal him!"
-
-Well, I let go all holts then, like I was shot. It was the most
-astonishing speech I ever heard--and I'm bound to say Tom Sawyer fell
-considerable in my estimation. Only I couldn't believe it. Tom Sawyer
-a _nigger-stealer!_
-
-"Oh, shucks!" I says; "you're joking."
-
-"I ain't joking, either."
-
-"Well, then," I says, "joking or no joking, if you hear anything said
-about a runaway nigger, don't forget to remember that _you_ don't know
-nothing about him, and I don't know nothing about him."
-
-Then he took the trunk and put it in my wagon, and he drove off his
-way and I drove mine. But of course I forgot all about driving slow on
-accounts of being glad and full of thinking; so I got home a heap too
-quick for that length of a trip. The old gentleman was at the door,
-and he says:
-
-"Why, this is wonderful! Whoever would 'a' thought it was in that mare
-to do it? I wish we'd 'a' timed her. And she hain't sweated a
-hair--not a hair. It's wonderful. Why, I wouldn't take a hundred
-dollars for that horse now--I wouldn't, honest; and yet I'd 'a' sold
-her for fifteen before, and thought 'twas all she was worth."
-
-That's all he said. He was the innocentest, best old soul I ever see.
-But it warn't surprising; because he warn't only just a farmer, he was
-a preacher, too, and had a little one-horse log church down back of
-the plantation, which he built it himself at his own expense, for a
-church and schoolhouse, and never charged nothing for his preaching,
-and it was worth it, too. There was plenty other farmer-preachers like
-that, and done the same way, down South.
-
-In about half an hour Tom's wagon drove up to the front stile, and
-Aunt Sally she see it through the window, because it was only about
-fifty yards, and says:
-
-"Why, there's somebody come! I wonder who 'tis? Why, I do believe it's
-a stranger. Jimmy" (that's one of the children), "run and tell Lize to
-put on another plate for dinner."
-
-Everybody made a rush for the front door, because, of course, a
-stranger don't come _every_ year, and so he lays over the
-yaller-fever, for interest, when he does come. Tom was over the stile
-and starting for the house; the wagon was spinning up the road for the
-village, and we was all bunched in the front door. Tom had his store
-clothes on, and an audience--and that was always nuts for Tom Sawyer.
-In them circumstances it warn't no trouble to him to throw in an
-amount of style that was suitable. He warn't a boy to meeky along up
-that yard like a sheep; no, he come ca'm and important, like the ram.
-When he got a-front of us he lifts his hat ever so gracious and
-dainty, like it was the lid of a box that had butterflies asleep in it
-and he didn't want to disturb them, and says:
-
-"Mr. Archibald Nichols, I presume?"
-
-"No, my boy," says the old gentleman, "I'm sorry to say 't your driver
-has deceived you; Nichols's place is down a matter of three mile more.
-Come in, come in."
-
-Tom he took a look back over his shoulder, and says, "Too late--he's
-out of sight."
-
-"Yes, he's gone, my son, and you must come in and eat your dinner with
-us; and then we'll hitch up and take you down to Nichols's."
-
-"Oh, I _can't_ make you so much trouble; I couldn't think of it. I'll
-walk--I don't mind the distance."
-
-"But we won't _let_ you walk--it wouldn't be Southern hospitality to
-do it. Come right in."
-
-"Oh, _do_,"' says Aunt Sally; "it ain't a bit of trouble to us, not a
-bit in the world. You must stay. It's a long, dusty three mile, and we
-can't let you walk. And, besides, I've already told 'em to put on
-another plate when I see you coming; so you mustn't disappoint us.
-Come right in and make yourself at home."
-
-So Tom he thanked them very hearty and handsome, and let himself be
-persuaded, and come in; and when he was in he said he was a stranger
-from Hicksville, Ohio, and his name was William Thompson--and he made
-another bow.
-
-Well, he run on, and on, and on, making up stuff about Hicksville and
-everybody in it he could invent, and I getting a little nervious, and
-wondering how this was going to help me out of my scrape; and at last,
-still talking along, he reached over and kissed Aunt Sally right on
-the mouth, and then settled back again in his chair comfortable, and
-was going on talking; but she jumped up and wiped it off with the back
-of her hand, and says:
-
-"You owdacious puppy!"
-
-He looked kind of hurt, and says:
-
-"I'm surprised at you, m'am."
-
-"You're s'rp--Why, what do you reckon _I_ am? I've a good notion to
-take and--Say, what do you mean by kissing me?"
-
-He looked kind of humble, and says:
-
-"I didn't mean nothing, m'am. I didn't mean no harm. I--I--thought
-you'd like it."
-
-"Why, you born fool!" She took up the spinning-stick, and it looked
-like it was all she could do to keep from giving him a crack with it.
-"What made you think I'd like it?"
-
-"Well, I don't know. Only, they--they--told me you would."
-
-"_They_ told you I would. Whoever told you's _another_ lunatic. I
-never heard the beat of it. Who's _they?_"
-
-"Why, everybody. They all said so, m'am."
-
-It was all she could do to hold in; and her eyes snapped, and her
-fingers worked like she wanted to scratch him; and she says:
-
-"Who's 'everybody'? Out with their names, or ther'll be an idiot
-short."
-
-He got up and looked distressed, and fumbled his hat, and says:
-
-"I'm sorry, and I warn't expecting it. They told me to. They all told
-me to. They all said, kiss her; and said she'd like it. They all said
-it--every one of them. But I'm sorry, m'am, and I won't do it no
-more--I won't, honest."
-
-"You won't, won't you? Well, I sh'd _reckon_ you won't!"
-
-"No'm, I'm honest about it; I won't ever do it again--till you ask
-me."
-
-"Till I _ask_ you! Well, I never see the beat of it in my born days! I
-lay you'll be the Methusalem-numskull of creation before ever _I_ ask
-you--or the likes of you."
-
-"Well," he says, "it does surprise me so. I can't make it out,
-somehow. They said you would, and I thought you would. But--" He
-stopped and looked around slow, like he wished he could run across a
-friendly eye somewheres, and fetched up on the old gentleman's, and
-says, "Didn't _you_ think she'd like me to kiss her, sir?"
-
-"Why, no; I--I--well, no, I b'lieve I didn't."
-
-Then he looks on around the same way to me, and says:
-
-"Tom, didn't _you_ think Aunt Sally 'd open out her arms and say, 'Sid
-Sawyer--'"
-
-"My land!" she says, breaking in and jumping for him, "you impudent
-young rascal, to fool a body so--" and was going to hug him, but he
-fended her off, and says:
-
-"No, not till you've asked me first."
-
-So she didn't lose no time, but asked him; and hugged him and kissed
-him over and over again, and then turned him over to the old man, and
-he took what was left. And after they got a little quiet again she
-says:
-
-"Why, dear me, I never see such a surprise. We warn't looking for
-_you_ at all, but only Tom. Sis never wrote to me about anybody coming
-but him."
-
-"It's because it warn't _intended_ for any of us to come but Tom," he
-says; "but I begged and begged, and at the last minute she let me
-come, too; so, coming down the river, me and Tom thought it would be a
-first-rate surprise for him to come here to the house first, and for
-me to by and by tag along and drop in, and let on to be a stranger.
-But it was a mistake, Aunt Sally. This ain't no healthy place for a
-stranger to come."
-
-"No--not impudent whelps, Sid. You ought to had your jaws boxed; I
-hain't been so put out since I don't know when. But I don't care, I
-don't mind the terms--I'd be willing to stand a thousand such jokes to
-have you here. Well, to think of that performance! I don't deny it, I
-was most putrified with astonishment when you give me that smack."
-
-We had dinner out in that broad open passage betwixt the house and the
-kitchen; and there was things enough on that table for seven
-families--and all hot, too; none of your flabby, tough meat that's
-laid in a cupboard in a damp cellar all night and tastes like a hunk
-of old cold cannibal in the morning. Uncle Silas he asked a pretty
-long blessing over it, but it was worth it; and it didn't cool it a
-bit, neither, the way I've seen them kind of interruptions do lots of
-times.
-
-There was a considerable good deal of talk all the afternoon, and me
-and Tom was on the lookout all the time; but it warn't no use, they
-didn't happen to say nothing about any runaway nigger, and we was
-afraid to try to work up to it. But at supper, at night, one of the
-little boys says:
-
-"Pa, mayn't Tom and Sid and me go to the show?"
-
-"No," says the old man, "I reckon there ain't going to be any; and you
-couldn't go if there was; because the runaway nigger told Burton and
-me all about that scandalous show, and Burton said he would tell the
-people; so I reckon they've drove the owdacious loafers out of town
-before this time."
-
-So there it was!--but _I_ couldn't help it. Tom and me was to sleep in
-the same room and bed; so, being tired, we bid good night and went up
-to bed right after supper, and clumb out of the window and down the
-lightning-rod, and shoved for the town; for I didn't believe anybody
-was going to give the king and the duke a hint, and so if I didn't
-hurry up and give them one they'd get into trouble sure.
-
-On the road Tom he told me all about how it was reckoned I was
-murdered, and how pap disappeared pretty soon, and didn't come back no
-more, and what a stir there was when Jim run away; and I told Tom all
-about our "Royal Nonesuch" rapscallions, and as much of the raft
-voyage as I had time to; and as we struck into the town and up through
-the middle of it--it was as much as half after eight then--here comes
-a raging rush of people with torches, and an awful whooping and
-yelling, and banging tin pans and blowing horns; and we jumped to one
-side to let them go by; and as they went by I see they had the king
-and the duke astraddle of a rail--that is, I knowed it _was_ the king
-and the duke, though they was all over tar and feathers, and didn't
-look like nothing in the world that was human--just looked like a
-couple of monstrous big soldier-plumes. Well, it made me sick to see
-it; and I was sorry for them poor pitiful rascals, it seemed like I
-couldn't ever feel any hardness against them any more in the world. It
-was a dreadful thing to see. Human beings _can_ be awful cruel to one
-another.
-
-We see we was too late--couldn't do no good. We asked some stragglers
-about it, and they said everybody went to the show looking very
-innocent; and laid low and kept dark till the poor old king was in the
-middle of his cavortings on the stage; then somebody give a signal,
-and the house rose up and went for them.
-
-So we poked along back home, and I warn't feeling so brash as I was
-before, but kind of ornery, and humble, and to blame, somehow--though
-I hadn't done nothing. But that's always the way; it don't make no
-difference whether you do right or wrong, a person's conscience ain't
-got no sense, and just goes for him _anyway._  If I had a yaller dog
-that didn't know no more than a person's conscience does I would pison
-him. It takes up more room than all the rest of a person's insides,
-and yet ain't no good, nohow. Tom Sawyer he says the same.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXIV
-
-
-We stopped talking, and got to thinking. By and by Tom says:
-
-"Looky here, Huck, what fools we are to not think of it before! I bet
-I know where Jim is."
-
-"No! Where?"
-
-"In that hut down by the ash-hopper. Why, looky here. When we was at
-dinner, didn't you see a nigger man go in there with some vittles?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"What did you think the vittles was for?"
-
-"For a dog."
-
-"So 'd I. Well, it wasn't for a dog."
-
-"Why?"
-
-"Because part of it was watermelon."
-
-"So it was--I noticed it. Well, it does beat all that I never thought
-about a dog not eating watermelon. It shows how a body can see and
-don't see at the same time."
-
-"Well, the nigger unlocked the padlock when he went in, and he locked
-it again when he came out. He fetched uncle a key about the time we
-got up from table--same key, I bet. Watermelon shows man, lock shows
-prisoner; and it ain't likely there's two prisoners on such a little
-plantation, and where the people's all so kind and good. Jim's the
-prisoner. All right--I'm glad we found it out detective fashion; I
-wouldn't give shucks for any other way. Now you work your mind, and
-study out a plan to steal Jim, and I will study out one, too; and
-we'll take the one we like the best."
-
-What a head for just a boy to have! If I had Tom Sawyer's head I
-wouldn't trade it off to be a duke, nor mate of a steamboat, nor clown
-in a circus, nor nothing I can think of. I went to thinking out a
-plan, but only just to be doing something; I knowed very well where
-the right plan was going to come from. Pretty soon Tom says:
-
-"Ready?"
-
-"Yes," I says.
-
-"All right--bring it out."
-
-"My plan is this," I says. "We can easy find out if it's Jim in there.
-Then get up my canoe to-morrow night, and fetch my raft over from the
-island. Then the first dark night that comes steal the key out of the
-old man's britches after he goes to bed, and shove off down the river
-on the raft with Jim, hiding daytimes and running nights, the way me
-and Jim used to do before. Wouldn't that plan work?"
-
-"_Work?_ Why, cert'nly it would work, like rats a-fighting. But it's
-too blame' simple; there ain't nothing _to_ it. What's the good of a
-plan that ain't no more trouble than that? It's as mild as goose-milk.
-Why, Huck, it wouldn't make no more talk than breaking into a soap
-factory."
-
-I never said nothing, because I warn't expecting nothing different;
-but I knowed mighty well that whenever he got _his_ plan ready it
-wouldn't have none of them objections to it.
-
-And it didn't. He told me what it was, and I see in a minute it was
-worth fifteen of mine for style, and would make Jim just as free a man
-as mine would, and maybe get us all killed besides. So I was
-satisfied, and said we would waltz in on it. I needn't tell what it
-was here, because I knowed it wouldn't stay the way it was. I knowed
-he would be changing it around every which way as we went along, and
-heaving in new bullinesses wherever he got a chance. And that is what
-he done.
-
-Well, one thing was dead sure, and that was that Tom Sawyer was in
-earnest, and was actuly going to help steal that nigger out of
-slavery. That was the thing that was too many for me. Here was a boy
-that was respectable and well brung up; and had a character to lose;
-and folks at home that had characters; and he was bright and not
-leather-headed; and knowing and not ignorant; and not mean, but kind;
-and yet here he was, without any more pride, or rightness, or feeling,
-than to stoop to this business, and make himself a shame, and his
-family a shame, before everybody. I _couldn't_ understand it no way at
-all. It was outrageous, and I knowed I ought to just up and tell him
-so; and so be his true friend, and let him quit the thing right where
-he was and save himself. And I _did_ start to tell him; but he shut me
-up, and says:
-
-"Don't you reckon I know what I'm about?  Don't I generly know what
-I'm about?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Didn't I _say_ I was going to help steal the nigger?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Well, then."
-
-That's all he said, and that's all I said. It warn't no use to say any
-more; because when he said he'd do a thing, he always done it. But I
-couldn't make out how he was willing to go into this thing; so I just
-let it go, and never bothered no more about it. If he was bound to
-have it so, I couldn't help it.
-
-When we got home the house was all dark and still; so we went on down
-to the hut by the ash-hopper for to examine it. We went through the
-yard so as to see what the hounds would do. They knowed us, and didn't
-make no more noise than country dogs is always doing when anything
-comes by in the night. When we got to the cabin we took a look at the
-front and the two sides; and on the side I warn't acquainted
-with--which was the north side--we found a square window-hole, up
-tolerable high, with just one stout board nailed across it. I says:
-
-"Here's the ticket. This hole's big enough for Jim to get through if
-we wrench off the board."
-
-Tom says:
-
-"It's as simple as tit-tat-toe, three-in-a-row, and as easy as playing
-hooky. I should _hope_ we can find a way that's a little more
-complicated than _that_, Huck Finn."
-
-"Well, then," I says, "how'll it do to saw him out, the way I done
-before I was murdered that time?"
-
-"That's more _like_," he says. "It's real mysterious, and troublesome,
-and good," he says; "but I bet we can find a way that's twice as long.
-There ain't no hurry; le's keep on looking around."
-
-Betwixt the hut and the fence, on the back side, was a lean-to that
-joined the hut at the eaves, and was made out of plank. It was as long
-as the hut, but narrow--only about six foot wide. The door to it was
-at the south end, and was padlocked. Tom he went to the soap-kettle
-and searched around, and fetched back the iron thing they lift the lid
-with; so he took it and prized out one of the staples. The chain fell
-down, and we opened the door and went in, and shut it, and struck a
-match, and see the shed was only built against a cabin and hadn't no
-connection with it; and there warn't no floor to the shed, nor nothing
-in it but some old rusty played-out hoes and spades and picks and a
-crippled plow. The match went out, and so did we, and shoved in the
-staple again, and the door was locked as good as ever. Tom was joyful.
-He says:
-
-"Now we're all right. We'll _dig_ him out. It 'll take about a week!"
-
-Then we started for the house, and I went in the back door--you only
-have to pull a buckskin latch-string, they don't fasten the doors--but
-that warn't romantical enough for Tom Sawyer; no way would do him but
-he must climb up the lightning-rod. But after he got up half-way about
-three times, and missed fire and fell every time, and the last time
-most busted his brains out, he thought he'd got to give it up; but
-after he was rested he allowed he would give her one more turn for
-luck, and this time he made the trip.
-
-In the morning we was up at break of day, and down to the nigger
-cabins to pet the dogs and make friends with the nigger that fed
-Jim--if it _was_ Jim that was being fed. The niggers was just getting
-through breakfast and starting for the fields; and Jim's nigger was
-piling up a tin pan with bread and meat and things; and whilst the
-others was leaving, the key come from the house.
-
-This nigger had a good-natured, chuckle-headed face, and his wool was
-all tied up in little bunches with thread. That was to keep witches
-off. He said the witches was pestering him awful these nights, and
-making him see all kinds of strange things, and hear all kinds of
-strange words and noises, and he didn't believe he was ever witched so
-long before in his life. He got so worked up, and got to running on so
-about his troubles, he forgot all about what he'd been a-going to do.
-So Tom says:
-
-"What's the vittles for?  Going to feed the dogs?"
-
-The nigger kind of smiled around graduly over his face, like when you
-heave a brickbat in a mud-puddle, and he says:
-
-"Yes, Mars Sid, _a_ dog. Cur'us dog, too. Does you want to go en look
-at 'im?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-I hunched Tom, and whispers:
-
-"You going, right here in the daybreak? _That_ warn't the plan."
-
-"No, it warn't; but it's the plan _now._"
-
-So, drat him, we went along, but I didn't like it much. When we got in
-we couldn't hardly see anything, it was so dark; but Jim was there,
-sure enough, and could see us; and he sings out:
-
-"Why, _Huck!_ En good _lan'!_ ain' dat Misto Tom?"
-
-I just knowed how it would be; I just expected it. I didn't know
-nothing to do; and if I had I couldn't 'a' done it, because that
-nigger busted in and says:
-
-"Why, de gracious sakes! do he know you genlmen?"
-
-We could see pretty well now. Tom he looked at the nigger, steady and
-kind of wondering, and says:
-
-"Does _who_ know us?"
-
-"Why, dis-yer runaway nigger."
-
-"I don't reckon he does; but what put that into your head?"
-
-"What _put_ it dar? Didn' he jis' dis minute sing out like he knowed
-you?"
-
-Tom says, in a puzzled-up kind of way:
-
-"Well, that's mighty curious. _Who_ sung out? _When_ did he sing out?
-_What_ did he sing out?" And turns to me, perfectly ca'm, and says,
-"Did _you_ hear anybody sing out?"
-
-Of course there warn't nothing to be said but the one thing; so I
-says:
-
-"No; _I_ ain't heard nobody say nothing."
-
-Then he turns to Jim, and looks him over like he never see him before,
-and says:
-
-"Did you sing out?"
-
-"No, sah," says Jim; "I hain't said nothing, sah."
-
-"Not a word?"
-
-"No, sah, I hain't said a word."
-
-"Did you ever see us before?"
-
-"No, sah; not as I knows on."
-
-So Tom turns to the nigger, which was looking wild and distressed, and
-says, kind of severe:
-
-"What do you reckon's the matter with you, anyway? What made you think
-somebody sung out?"
-
-"Oh, it's de dad-blame' witches, sah, en I wisht I was dead, I do.
-Dey's awluz at it, sah, en dey do mos' kill me, dey sk'yers me so.
-Please to don't tell nobody 'bout it sah, er ole Mars Silas he'll
-scole me; 'kase he say dey _ain't_ no witches. I jis' wish to goodness
-he was heah now--_den_ what would he say! I jis' bet he couldn' fine
-no way to git aroun' it _dis_ time. But it's awluz jis' so; people
-dat's _sot_, stays sot; dey won't look into noth'n' en fine it out f'r
-deyselves, en when _you_ fine it out en tell um 'bout it, dey doan'
-b'lieve you."
-
-Tom give him a dime, and said we wouldn't tell nobody; and told him to
-buy some more thread to tie up his wool with; and then looks at Jim,
-and says:
-
-"I wonder if Uncle Silas is going to hang this nigger. If I was to
-catch a nigger that was ungrateful enough to run away, I wouldn't give
-him up, I'd hang him." And whilst the nigger stepped to the door to
-look at the dime and bite it to see if it was good, he whispers to Jim
-and says:
-
-"Don't ever let on to know us. And if you hear any digging going on
-nights, it's us; we're going to set you free."
-
-Jim only had time to grab us by the hand and squeeze it; then the
-nigger come back, and we said we'd come again some time if the nigger
-wanted us to; and he said he would, more particular if it was dark,
-because the witches went for him mostly in the dark, and it was good
-to have folks around then.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXV
-
-
-It would be most an hour yet till breakfast, so we left and struck
-down into the woods; because Tom said we got to have _some_ light to
-see how to dig by, and a lantern makes too much, and might get us into
-trouble; what we must have was a lot of them rotten chunks that's
-called fox-fire, and just makes a soft kind of a glow when you lay
-them in a dark place. We fetched an armful and hid it in the weeds,
-and set down to rest, and Tom says, kind of dissatisfied:
-
-"Blame it, this whole thing is just as easy and awkward as it can be.
-And so it makes it so rotten difficult to get up a difficult plan.
-There ain't no watchman to be drugged--now there _ought_ to be a
-watchman. There ain't even a dog to give a sleeping-mixture to. And
-there's Jim chained by one leg, with a ten-foot chain, to the leg of
-his bed: why, all you got to do is to lift up the bedstead and slip
-off the chain. And Uncle Silas he trusts everybody; sends the key to
-the punkin-headed nigger, and don't send nobody to watch the nigger.
-Jim could 'a' got out of that window-hole before this, only there
-wouldn't be no use trying to travel with a ten-foot chain on his leg.
-Why, drat it, Huck, it's the stupidest arrangement I ever see. You got
-to invent _all_ the difficulties. Well, we can't help it; we got to do
-the best we can with the materials we've got. Anyhow, there's one
-thing--there's more honor in getting him out through a lot of
-difficulties and dangers, where there warn't one of them furnished to
-you by the people who it was their duty to furnish them, and you had
-to contrive them all out of your own head. Now look at just that one
-thing of the lantern. When you come down to the cold facts, we simply
-got to _let on_ that a lantern's resky. Why, we could work with a
-torchlight procession if we wanted to, _I_ believe. Now, whilst I
-think of it, we got to hunt up something to make a saw out of the
-first chance we get."
-
-"What do we want of a saw?"
-
-"What do we _want_ of a saw? Hain't we got to saw the leg of Jim's bed
-off, so as to get the chain loose?"
-
-"Why, you just said a body could lift up the bedstead and slip the
-chain off."
-
-"Well, if that ain't just like you, Huck Finn. You _can_ get up the
-infant-schooliest ways of going at a thing. Why, hain't you ever read
-any books at all?--Baron Trenck, nor Casanova, nor Benvenuto
-Chelleeny, nor Henri IV., nor none of them heroes? Who ever heard of
-getting a prisoner loose in such an old-maidy way as that?  No; the
-way all the best authorities does is to saw the bed-leg in two, and
-leave it just so, and swallow the sawdust, so it can't be found, and
-put some dirt and grease around the sawed place so the very keenest
-seneskal can't see no sign of its being sawed, and thinks the bed-leg
-is perfectly sound. Then, the night you're ready, fetch the leg a
-kick, down she goes; slip off your chain, and there you are. Nothing
-to do but hitch your rope ladder to the battlements, shin down it,
-break your leg in the moat--because a rope ladder is nineteen foot too
-short, you know--and there's your horses and your trusty vassles, and
-they scoop you up and fling you across a saddle, and away you go to
-your native Langudoc, or Navarre, or wherever it is. It's gaudy, Huck.
-I wish there was a moat to this cabin. If we get time, the night of
-the escape, we'll dig one."
-
-I says:
-
-"What do we want of a moat when we're going to snake him out from
-under the cabin?"
-
-But he never heard me. He had forgot me and everything else. He had
-his chin in his hand, thinking. Pretty soon he sighs and shakes his
-head; then sighs again, and says:
-
-"No, it wouldn't do--there ain't necessity enough for it."
-
-"For what?" I says.
-
-"Why, to saw Jim's leg off," he says.
-
-"Good land!" I says; "why, there ain't _no_ necessity for it. And what
-would you want to saw his leg off for, anyway?"
-
-"Well, some of the best authorities has done it. They couldn't get the
-chain off, so they just cut their hand off and shoved. And a leg would
-be better still. But we got to let that go. There ain't necessity
-enough in this case; and, besides, Jim's a nigger, and wouldn't
-understand the reasons for it, and how it's the custom in Europe; so
-we'll let it go. But there's one thing--he can have a rope ladder; we
-can tear up our sheets and make him a rope ladder easy enough. And we
-can send it to him in a pie; it's mostly done that way. And I've et
-worse pies."
-
-"Why, Tom Sawyer, how you talk," I says; "Jim ain't got no use for a
-rope ladder."
-
-"He _has_ got use for it. How _you_ talk, you better say; you don't
-know nothing about it. He's _got_ to have a rope ladder; they all do."
-
-"What in the nation can he _do_ with it?"
-
-"_Do_ with it? He can hide it in his bed, can't he? That's what they
-all do; and _he's_ got to, too. Huck, you don't ever seem to want to
-do anything that's regular; you want to be starting something fresh
-all the time. S'pose he _don't_ do nothing with it? ain't it there in
-his bed, for a clue, after he's gone? and don't you reckon they'll
-want clues? Of course they will. And you wouldn't leave them any? That
-would be a _pretty_ howdy-do, _wouldn't_ it! I never heard of such a
-thing."
-
-"Well," I says, "if it's in the regulations, and he's got to have it,
-all right, let him have it; because I don't wish to go back on no
-regulations; but there's one thing, Tom Sawyer--if we go to tearing up
-our sheets to make Jim a rope ladder, we're going to get into trouble
-with Aunt Sally, just as sure as you're born. Now, the way I look at
-it, a hickry-bark ladder don't cost nothing, and don't waste nothing,
-and is just as good to load up a pie with, and hide in a straw tick,
-as any rag ladder you can start; and as for Jim, he ain't had no
-experience, and so he don't care what kind of a--"
-
-"Oh, shucks, Huck Finn, if I was as ignorant as you I'd keep
-still--that's what I'd do. Who ever heard of a state prisoner escaping
-by a hickry-bark ladder? Why, it's perfectly ridiculous."
-
-"Well, all right, Tom, fix it your own way; but if you'll take my
-advice, you'll let me borrow a sheet off of the clothes-line."
-
-He said that would do. And that gave him another idea, and he says:
-
-"Borrow a shirt, too."
-
-"What do we want of a shirt, Tom?"
-
-"Want it for Jim to keep a journal on."
-
-"Journal your granny--_Jim_ can't write."
-
-"S'pose he _can't_ write--he can make marks on the shirt, can't he, if
-we make him a pen out of an old pewter spoon or a piece of an old iron
-barrel-hoop?"
-
-"Why, Tom, we can pull a feather out of a goose and make him a better
-one; and quicker, too."
-
-"_Prisoners_ don't have geese running around the donjon-keep to pull
-pens out of, you muggins. They _always_ make their pens out of the
-hardest, toughest, troublesomest piece of old brass candlestick or
-something like that they can get their hands on; and it takes them
-weeks and weeks and months and months to file it out, too, because
-they've got to do it by rubbing it on the wall. _They_ wouldn't use a
-goose-quill if they had it. It ain't regular."
-
-"Well, then, what 'll we make him the ink out of?"
-
-"Many makes it out of iron-rust and tears; but that's the common sort
-and women; the best authorities uses their own blood. Jim can do that;
-and when he wants to send any little common ordinary mysterious
-message to let the world know where he's captivated, he can write it
-on the bottom of a tin plate with a fork and throw it out of the
-window. The Iron Mask always done that, and it's a blame' good way,
-too."
-
-"Jim ain't got no tin plates. They feed him in a pan."
-
-"That ain't nothing; we can get him some."
-
-"Can't nobody _read_ his plates."
-
-"That ain't got anything to _do_ with it, Huck Finn. All _he's_ got to
-do is to write on the plate and throw it out. You don't _have_ to be
-able to read it. Why, half the time you can't read anything a prisoner
-writes on a tin plate, or anywhere else."
-
-"Well, then, what's the sense in wasting the plates?"
-
-"Why, blame it all, it ain't the _prisoner's_ plates."
-
-"But it's _somebody's_ plates, ain't it?"
-
-"Well, spos'n it is? What does the _prisoner_ care whose--"
-
-He broke off there, because we heard the breakfast-horn blowing. So we
-cleared out for the house.
-
-Along during the morning I borrowed a sheet and a white shirt off of
-the clothes-line; and I found an old sack and put them in it, and we
-went down and got the fox-fire, and put that in too. I called it
-borrowing, because that was what pap always called it; but Tom said it
-warn't borrowing, it was stealing. He said we was representing
-prisoners; and prisoners don't care how they get a thing so they get
-it, and nobody don't blame them for it, either. It ain't no crime in a
-prisoner to steal the thing he needs to get away with, Tom said; it's
-his right; and so, as long as we was representing a prisoner, we had a
-perfect right to steal anything on this place we had the least use for
-to get ourselves out of prison with. He said if we warn't prisoners it
-would be a very different thing, and nobody but a mean, ornery person
-would steal when he warn't a prisoner. So we allowed we would steal
-everything there was that come handy. And yet he made a mighty fuss,
-one day, after that, when I stole a watermelon out of the nigger patch
-and eat it; and he made me go and give the niggers a dime without
-telling them what it was for. Tom said that what he meant was, we
-could steal anything we _needed._ Well, I says, I needed the
-watermelon. But he said I didn't need it to get out of prison with;
-there's where the difference was. He said if I'd 'a' wanted it to hide
-a knife in, and smuggle it to Jim to kill the seneskal with, it would
-'a' been all right. So I let it go at that, though I couldn't see no
-advantage in my representing a prisoner if I got to set down and chaw
-over a lot of gold-leaf distinctions like that every time I see a
-chance to hog a watermelon.
-
-Well, as I was saying, we waited that morning till everybody was
-settled down to business, and nobody in sight around the yard; then
-Tom he carried the sack into the lean-to whilst I stood off a piece to
-keep watch. By and by he come out, and we went and set down on the
-woodpile to talk. He says:
-
-"Everything's all right now except tools; and that's easy fixed."
-
-"Tools?" I says.
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Tools for what?"
-
-"Why, to dig with. We ain't a-going to _gnaw_ him out, are we?"
-
-"Ain't them old crippled picks and things in there good enough to dig
-a nigger out with?" I says.
-
-He turns on me, looking pitying enough to make a body cry, and says:
-
-"Huck Finn, did you _ever_ hear of a prisoner having picks and
-shovels, and all the modern conveniences in his wardrobe to dig
-himself out with?  Now I want to ask you--if you got any
-reasonableness in you at all--what kind of a show would _that_ give
-him to be a hero? Why, they might as well lend him the key and done
-with it. Picks and shovels--why, they wouldn't furnish 'em to a king."
-
-"Well, then," I says, "if we don't want the picks and shovels, what do
-we want?"
-
-"A couple of case-knives."
-
-"To dig the foundations out from under that cabin with?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"Confound it, it's foolish, Tom."
-
-"It don't make no difference how foolish it is, it's the _right_
-way--and it's the regular way. And there ain't no _other_ way, that
-ever I heard of, and I've read all the books that gives any
-information about these things. They always dig out with a
-case-knife--and not through dirt, mind you; generly it's through solid
-rock. And it takes them weeks and weeks and weeks, and for ever and
-ever. Why, look at one of them prisoners in the bottom dungeon of the
-Castle Deef, in the harbor of Marseilles, that dug himself out that
-way; how long was _he_ at it, you reckon?"
-
-"I don't know."
-
-"Well, guess."
-
-"I don't know. A month and a half."
-
-"_Thirty-seven year_--and he come out in China. _That's_ the kind. I
-wish the bottom of _this_ fortress was solid rock."
-
-"_Jim_ don't know nobody in China."
-
-"What's _that_ got to do with it? Neither did that other fellow. But
-you're always a-wandering off on a side issue. Why can't you stick to
-the main point?"
-
-"All right--I don't care where he comes out, so he _comes_ out; and
-Jim don't, either, I reckon. But there's one thing, anyway--Jim's too
-old to be dug out with a case-knife. He won't last."
-
-"Yes he will _last,_ too. You don't reckon it's going to take
-thirty-seven years to dig out through a _dirt_ foundation, do you?"
-
-"How long will it take, Tom?"
-
-"Well, we can't resk being as long as we ought to, because it mayn't
-take very long for Uncle Silas to hear from down there by New Orleans.
-He'll hear Jim ain't from there. Then his next move will be to
-advertise Jim, or something like that. So we can't resk being as long
-digging him out as we ought to. By rights I reckon we ought to be a
-couple of years; but we can't. Things being so uncertain, what I
-recommend is this: that we really dig right in, as quick as we can;
-and after that, we can _let on_, to ourselves, that we was at it
-thirty-seven years. Then we can snatch him out and rush him away the
-first time there's an alarm. Yes, I reckon that 'll be the best way."
-
-"Now, there's _sense_ in that," I says. "Letting on don't cost
-nothing; letting on ain't no trouble; and if it's any object, I don't
-mind letting on we was at it a hundred and fifty year. It wouldn't
-strain me none, after I got my hand in. So I'll mosey along now, and
-smouch a couple of case-knives."
-
-"Smouch three," he says; "we want one to make a saw out of."
-
-"Tom, if it ain't unregular and irreligious to sejest it," I says,
-"there's an old rusty saw-blade around yonder sticking under the
-weather-boarding behind the smokehouse."
-
-He looked kind of weary and discouraged-like, and says:
-
-"It ain't no use to try to learn you nothing, Huck. Run along and
-smouch the knives--three of them." So I done it.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXVI
-
-
-As soon as we reckoned everybody was asleep that night we went down
-the lightning-rod, and shut ourselves up in the lean-to, and got out
-our pile of fox-fire, and went to work. We cleared everything out of
-the way, about four or five foot along the middle of the bottom log.
-Tom said we was right behind Jim's bed now, and we'd dig in under it,
-and when we got through there couldn't nobody in the cabin ever know
-there was any hole there, because Jim's counterpin hung down most to
-the ground, and you'd have to raise it up and look under to see the
-hole. So we dug and dug with the case-knives till most midnight; and
-then we was dog-tired, and our hands was blistered, and yet you
-couldn't see we'd done anything hardly. At last I says:
-
-"This ain't no thirty-seven-year job; this is a thirty-eight-year job,
-Tom Sawyer."
-
-He never said nothing. But he sighed, and pretty soon he stopped
-digging, and then for a good little while I knowed that he was
-thinking. Then he says:
-
-"It ain't no use, Huck, it ain't a-going to work. If we was prisoners
-it would, because then we'd have as many years as we wanted, and no
-hurry; and we wouldn't get but a few minutes to dig, every day, while
-they was changing watches, and so our hands wouldn't get blistered,
-and we could keep it up right along, year in and year out, and do it
-right, and the way it ought to be done. But _we_ can't fool along; we
-got to rush; we ain't got no time to spare. If we was to put in
-another night this way we'd have to knock off for a week to let our
-hands get well--couldn't touch a case-knife with them sooner."
-
-"Well, then, what we going to do, Tom?"
-
-"I'll tell you. It ain't right, and it ain't moral, and I wouldn't
-like it to get out; but there ain't only just the one way: we got to
-dig him out with the picks, and _let on_ it's case-knives."
-
-"_Now_ you're _talking!_" I says; "your head gets leveler and leveler
-all the time, Tom Sawyer," I says. "Picks is the thing, moral or no
-moral; and as for me, I don't care shucks for the morality of it,
-nohow. When I start in to steal a nigger, or a watermelon, or a
-Sunday-school book, I ain't no ways particular how it's done so it's
-done. What I want is my nigger; or what I want is my watermelon; or
-what I want is my Sunday-school book; and if a pick's the handiest
-thing, that's the thing I'm a-going to dig that nigger or that
-watermelon or that Sunday-school book out with; and I don't give a
-dead rat what the authorities thinks about it nuther."
-
-"Well," he says, "there's excuse for picks and letting on in a case
-like this; if it warn't so, I wouldn't approve of it, nor I wouldn't
-stand by and see the rules broke--because right is right, and wrong is
-wrong, and a body ain't got no business doing wrong when he ain't
-ignorant and knows better. It might answer for _you_ to dig Jim out
-with a pick, _without_ any letting on, because you don't know no
-better; but it wouldn't for me, because I do know better. Gimme a
-case-knife."
-
-He had his own by him, but I handed him mine. He flung it down, and
-says:
-
-"Gimme a _case-knife._"
-
-I didn't know just what to do--but then I thought. I scratched around
-amongst the old tools, and got a pickax and give it to him, and he
-took it and went to work, and never said a word.
-
-He was always just that particular. Full of principle.
-
-So then I got a shovel, and then we picked and shoveled, turn about,
-and made the fur fly. We stuck to it about a half an hour, which was
-as long as we could stand up; but we had a good deal of a hole to show
-for it. When I got up-stairs I looked out at the window and see Tom
-doing his level best with the lightning-rod, but he couldn't come it,
-his hands was so sore. At last he says:
-
-"It ain't no use, it can't be done. What you reckon I better do? Can't
-you think of no way?"
-
-"Yes," I says, "but I reckon it ain't regular. Come up the stairs, and
-let on it's a lightning-rod."
-
-So he done it.
-
-Next day Tom stole a pewter spoon and a brass candlestick in the
-house, for to make some pens for Jim out of, and six tallow candles;
-and I hung around the nigger cabins and laid for a chance, and stole
-three tin plates. Tom says it wasn't enough; but I said nobody
-wouldn't ever see the plates that Jim throwed out, because they'd fall
-in the dog-fennel and jimpson weeds under the window-hole--then we
-could tote them back and he could use them over again. So Tom was
-satisfied. Then he says:
-
-"Now, the thing to study out is, how to get the things to Jim."
-
-"Take them in through the hole," I says, "when we get it done."
-
-He only just looked scornful, and said something about nobody ever
-heard of such an idiotic idea, and then he went to studying. By and by
-he said he had ciphered out two or three ways, but there warn't no
-need to decide on any of them yet. Said we'd got to post Jim first.
-
-That night we went down the lightning-rod a little after ten, and took
-one of the candles along, and listened under the window-hole, and
-heard Jim snoring; so we pitched it in, and it didn't wake him. Then
-we whirled in with the pick and shovel, and in about two hours and a
-half the job was done. We crept in under Jim's bed and into the cabin,
-and pawed around and found the candle and lit it, and stood over Jim
-awhile, and found him looking hearty and healthy, and then we woke him
-up gentle and gradual. He was so glad to see us he most cried; and
-called us honey, and all the pet names he could think of; and was for
-having us hunt up a cold-chisel to cut the chain off of his leg with
-right away, and clearing out without losing any time. But Tom he
-showed him how unregular it would be, and set down and told him all
-about our plans, and how we could alter them in a minute any time
-there was an alarm; and not to be the least afraid, because we would
-see he got away, _sure_. So Jim he said it was all right, and we set
-there and talked over old times awhile, and then Tom asked a lot of
-questions, and when Jim told him Uncle Silas come in every day or two
-to pray with him, and Aunt Sally come in to see if he was comfortable
-and had plenty to eat, and both of them was kind as they could be, Tom
-says:
-
-"_Now_ I know how to fix it. We'll send you some things by them."
-
-I said, "Don't do nothing of the kind; it's one of the most jackass
-ideas I ever struck"; but he never paid no attention to me; went right
-on. It was his way when he'd got his plans set.
-
-So he told Jim how we'd have to smuggle in the rope-ladder pie and
-other large things by Nat, the nigger that fed him, and he must be on
-the lookout, and not be surprised, and not let Nat see him open them;
-and we would put small things in uncle's coat pockets and he must
-steal them out; and we would tie things to aunt's apron-strings or put
-them in her apron pocket, if we got a chance; and told him what they
-would be and what they was for. And told him how to keep a journal on
-the shirt with his blood, and all that. He told him everything. Jim he
-couldn't see no sense in the most of it, but he allowed we was white
-folks and knowed better than him; so he was satisfied, and said he
-would do it all just as Tom said.
-
-Jim had plenty corn-cob pipes and tobacco; so we had a right down good
-sociable time; then we crawled out through the hole, and so home to
-bed, with hands that looked like they'd been chawed. Tom was in high
-spirits. He said it was the best fun he ever had in his life, and the
-most intellectural; and said if he only could see his way to it we
-would keep it up all the rest of our lives and leave Jim to our
-children to get out; for he believed Jim would come to like it better
-and better the more he got used to it. He said that in that way it
-could be strung out to as much as eighty year, and would be the best
-time on record. And he said it would make us all celebrated that had a
-hand in it.
-
-In the morning we went out to the woodpile and chopped up the brass
-candlestick into handy sizes, and Tom put them and the pewter spoon in
-his pocket. Then we went to the nigger cabins, and while I got Nat's
-notice off, Tom shoved a piece of candlestick into the middle of a
-corn-pone that was in Jim's pan, and we went along with Nat to see how
-it would work, and it just worked noble; when Jim bit into it it most
-mashed all his teeth out; and there warn't ever anything could 'a'
-worked better. Tom said so himself. Jim he never let on but what it
-was only just a piece of rock or something like that that's always
-getting into bread, you know; but after that he never bit into nothing
-but what he jabbed his fork into it in three or four places first.
-
-And whilst we was a-standing there in the dimmish light, here comes a
-couple of the hounds bulging in from under Jim's bed; and they kept on
-piling in till there was eleven of them, and there warn't hardly room
-in there to get your breath. By jings, we forgot to fasten that
-lean-to door! The nigger Nat he only just hollered "Witches" once, and
-keeled over onto the floor amongst the dogs, and begun to groan like
-he was dying. Tom jerked the door open and flung out a slab of Jim's
-meat, and the dogs went for it, and in two seconds he was out himself
-and back again and shut the door, and I knowed he'd fixed the other
-door too. Then he went to work on the nigger, coaxing him and petting
-him, and asking him if he'd been imagining he saw something again. He
-raised up, and blinked his eyes around, and says:
-
-"Mars Sid, you'll say I's a fool, but if I didn't b'lieve I see most a
-million dogs, er devils, er some'n, I wisht I may die right heah in
-dese tracks. I did, mos' sholy. Mars Sid, I _felt_ um--I _felt_ um,
-sah; dey was all over me. Dad fetch it, I jis' wisht I could git my
-han's on one er dem witches jis' wunst--on'y jis' wunst--it's all I'd
-ast. But mos'ly I wisht dey'd lemme 'lone, I does."
-
-Tom says:
-
-"Well, I tell you what _I_ think. What makes them come here just at
-this runaway nigger's breakfast-time? It's because they're hungry;
-that's the reason. You make them a witch pie; that's the thing for
-_you_ to do."
-
-"But my lan', Mars Sid, how's I gwyne to make 'm a witch pie? I doan'
-know how to make it. I hain't ever hearn er sich a thing b'fo'."
-
-"Well, then, I'll have to make it myself."
-
-"Will you do it, honey?--will you? I'll wusshup de groun' und' yo'
-foot, I will!"
-
-[Illustration: TOM ADVISES A WITCH PIE]
-
-"All right, I'll do it, seeing it's you, and you've been good to us
-and showed us the runaway nigger. But you got to be mighty careful.
-When we come around, you turn your back; and then whatever we've put
-in the pan, don't you let on you see it at all. And don't you look
-when Jim unloads the pan--something might happen, I don't know what.
-And above all, don't you _handle_ the witch-things."
-
-"_Hannel_ 'm, Mars Sid? What _is_ you a-talkin' 'bout? I wouldn' lay
-de weight er my finger on um, not f'r ten hund'd thous'n billion
-dollars, I wouldn't."
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXVII
-
-
-_That_ was all fixed. So then we went away and went to the
-rubbage-pile in the back yard, where they keep the old boots, and
-rags, and pieces of bottles, and wore-out tin things, and all such
-truck, and scratched around and found an old tin washpan, and stopped
-up the holes as well as we could, to bake the pie in, and took it down
-cellar and stole it full of flour and started for breakfast, and found
-a couple of shingle-nails that Tom said would be handy for a prisoner
-to scrabble his name and sorrows on the dungeon walls with, and
-dropped one of them in Aunt Sally's apron pocket which was hanging on
-a chair, and t'other we stuck in the band of Uncle Silas's hat, which
-was on the bureau, because we heard the children say their pa and ma
-was going to the runaway nigger's house this morning, and then went to
-breakfast, and Tom dropped the pewter spoon in Uncle Silas's coat
-pocket, and Aunt Sally wasn't come yet, so we had to wait a little
-while.
-
-And when she come she was hot and red and cross, and couldn't hardly
-wait for the blessing; and then she went to sluicing out coffee with
-one hand and cracking the handiest child's head with her thimble with
-the other, and says:
-
-"I've hunted high and I've hunted low, and it does beat all what _has_
-become of your other shirt."
-
-My heart fell down amongst my lungs and livers and things, and a hard
-piece of corn-crust started down my throat after it and got met on the
-road with a cough, and was shot across the table, and took one of the
-children in the eye and curled him up like a fishing-worm, and let a
-cry out of him the size of a war-whoop, and Tom he turned kinder blue
-around the gills, and it all amounted to a considerable state of
-things for about a quarter of a minute or as much as that, and I would
-'a' sold out for half price if there was a bidder. But after that we
-was all right again--it was the sudden surprise of it that knocked us
-so kind of cold. Uncle Silas he says:
-
-"It's most uncommon curious, I can't understand it. I know perfectly
-well I took it _off_, because--"
-
-"Because you hain't got but one _on_. Just _listen_ at the man! I know
-you took it off, and know it by a better way than your wool-gethering
-memory, too, because it was on the clo's-line yesterday--I see it
-there myself. But it's gone, that's the long and the short of it, and
-you'll just have to change to a red flann'l one till I can get time to
-make a new one. And it 'll be the third I've made in two years. It
-just keeps a body on the jump to keep you in shirts; and whatever you
-do manage to _do_ with 'm all is more'n I can make out. A body'd think
-you _would_ learn to take some sort of care of 'em at your time of
-life."
-
-"I know it, Sally, and I do try all I can. But it oughtn't to be
-altogether my fault, because, you know, I don't see them nor have
-nothing to do with them except when they're on me; and I don't believe
-I've ever lost one of them _off_ of me."
-
-"Well, it ain't _your_ fault if you haven't, Silas; you'd 'a' done it
-if you could, I reckon. And the shirt ain't all that's gone, nuther.
-Ther's a spoon gone; and _that_ ain't all. There was ten, and now
-ther' only nine. The calf got the shirt, I reckon, but the calf never
-took the spoon, _that's_ certain."
-
-"Why, what else is gone, Sally?"
-
-"Ther's six _candles_ gone--that's what. The rats could 'a' got the
-candles, and I reckon they did; I wonder they don't walk off with the
-whole place, the way you're always going to stop their holes and don't
-do it; and if they warn't fools they'd sleep in your hair,
-Silas--_you'd_ never find it out; but you can't lay the _spoon_ on the
-rats, and that I _know_."
-
-"Well, Sally, I'm in fault, and I acknowledge it; I've been remiss;
-but I won't let to-morrow go by without stopping up them holes."
-
-"Oh, I wouldn't hurry; next year 'll do. Matilda Angelina Araminta
-_Phelps!_"
-
-Whack comes the thimble, and the child snatches her claws out of the
-sugar-bowl without fooling around any. Just then the nigger woman
-steps onto the passage, and says:
-
-"Missus, dey's a sheet gone."
-
-"A _sheet_ gone! Well, for the land's sake!"
-
-"I'll stop up them holes to-day," says Uncle Silas, looking sorrowful.
-
-"Oh, _do_ shet up!--s'pose the rats took the _sheet?_ _Where's_ it
-gone, Lize?"
-
-"Clah to goodness I hain't no notion, Miss' Sally. She wuz on de
-clo's-line yistiddy, but she done gone: she ain' dah no mo' now."
-
-"I reckon the world _is_ coming to an end. I _never_ see the beat of
-it in all my born days. A shirt, and a sheet, and a spoon, and six
-can--"
-
-"Missus," comes a young yaller wench, "dey's a brass cannelstick
-miss'n."
-
-"Cler out from here, you hussy, er I'll take a skillet to ye!"
-
-Well, she was just a-biling. I begun to lay for a chance; I reckoned I
-would sneak out and go for the woods till the weather moderated. She
-kept a-raging right along, running her insurrection all by herself,
-and everybody else mighty meek and quiet; and at last Uncle Silas,
-looking kind of foolish, fishes up that spoon out of his pocket. She
-stopped, with her mouth open and her hands up; and as for me, I wished
-I was in Jeruslem or somewheres. But not long, because she says:
-
-"It's _just_ as I expected. So you had it in your pocket all the time;
-and like as not you've got the other things there, too. How'd it get
-there?"
-
-"I reely don't know, Sally," he says, kind of apologizing, "or you
-know I would tell. I was a-studying over my text in Acts Seventeen
-before breakfast, and I reckon I put it in there, not noticing,
-meaning to put my Testament in, and it must be so, because my
-Testament ain't in; but I'll go and see; and if the Testament is where
-I had it, I'll know I didn't put it in, and that will show that I laid
-the Testament down and took up the spoon, and--"
-
-"Oh, for the land's sake! Give a body a rest! Go 'long now, the whole
-kit and biling of ye; and don't come nigh me again till I've got back
-my peace of mind."
-
-I'd 'a' heard her if she'd 'a' said it to herself, let alone speaking
-it out; and I'd 'a' got up and obeyed her if I'd 'a' been dead. As we
-was passing through the setting-room the old man he took up his hat,
-and the shingle-nail fell out on the floor, and he just merely picked
-it up and laid it on the mantel-shelf, and never said nothing, and
-went out. Tom see him do it, and remembered about the spoon, and says:
-
-"Well, it ain't no use to send things by _him_ no more, he ain't
-reliable." Then he says: "But he done us a good turn with the spoon,
-anyway, without knowing it, and so we'll go and do him one without
-_him_ knowing it--stop up his rat-holes."
-
-There was a noble good lot of them down cellar, and it took us a whole
-hour, but we done the job tight and good and shipshape. Then we heard
-steps on the stairs, and blowed out our light and hid; and here comes
-the old man, with a candle in one hand and a bundle of stuff in
-t'other, looking as absent-minded as year before last. He went
-a-mooning around, first to one rat-hole and then another, till he'd
-been to them all. Then he stood about five minutes, picking
-tallow-drip off of his candle and thinking. Then he turns off slow and
-dreamy towards the stairs, saying:
-
-"Well, for the life of me I can't remember when I done it. I could
-show her now that I warn't to blame on account of the rats. But never
-mind--let it go. I reckon it wouldn't do no good."
-
-And so he went on a-mumbling up-stairs, and then we left. He was a
-mighty nice old man. And always is.
-
-Tom was a good deal bothered about what to do for a spoon, but he said
-we'd got to have it; so he took a think. When he had ciphered it out
-he told me how we was to do; then we went and waited around the
-spoon-basket till we see Aunt Sally coming, and then Tom went to
-counting the spoons and laying them out to one side, and I slid one of
-them up my sleeve, and Tom says:
-
-"Why, Aunt Sally, there ain't but nine spoons _yet_."
-
-She says:
-
-"Go 'long to your play, and don't bother me. I know better, I counted
-'m myself."
-
-"Well, I've counted them twice, Aunty, and _I_ can't make but nine."
-
-She looked out of all patience, but of course she come to
-count--anybody would.
-
-"I declare to gracious ther' _ain't_ but nine!" she says. "Why, what
-in the world--plague _take_ the things, I'll count 'm again."
-
-So I slipped back the one I had, and when she got done counting, she
-says:
-
-"Hang the troublesome rubbage, ther's _ten_ now!" and she looked huffy
-and bothered both. But Tom says:
-
-"Why, Aunty, I don't think there's ten."
-
-"You numskull, didn't you see me _count_ 'm?"
-
-"I know, but--"
-
-"Well, I'll count 'm again."
-
-So I smouched one, and they come out nine, same as the other time.
-Well, she _was_ in a tearing way--just a-trembling all over, she was
-so mad. But she counted and counted till she got that addled she'd
-start to count in the basket for a spoon sometimes; and so, three
-times they come out right, and three times they come out wrong. Then
-she grabbed up the basket and slammed it across the house and knocked
-the cat galley-west; and she said cler out and let her have some
-peace, and if we come bothering around her again betwixt that and
-dinner she'd skin us. So we had the odd spoon, and dropped it in her
-apron pocket whilst she was a-giving us our sailing orders, and Jim
-got it all right, along with her shingle-nail, before noon. We was
-very well satisfied with this business, and Tom allowed it was worth
-twice the trouble it took, because he said _now_ she couldn't ever
-count them spoons twice alike again to save her life; and wouldn't
-believe she'd counted them right if she _did_; and said that after
-she'd about counted her head off for the next three days he judged
-she'd give it up and offer to kill anybody that wanted her to ever
-count them any more.
-
-So we put the sheet back on the line that night, and stole one out of
-her closet; and kept on putting it back and stealing it again for a
-couple of days till she didn't know how many sheets she had any more,
-and she didn't _care_, and warn't a-going to bullyrag the rest of her
-soul out about it, and wouldn't count them again not to save her life;
-she druther die first.
-
-So we was all right now, as to the shirt and the sheet and the spoon
-and the candles, by the help of the calf and the rats and the mixed-up
-counting; and as to the candlestick, it warn't no consequence, it
-would blow over by and by.
-
-But that pie was a job; we had no end of trouble with that pie. We
-fixed it up away down in the woods, and cooked it there; and we got it
-done at last, and very satisfactory, too; but not all in one day; and
-we had to use up three wash-pans full of flour before we got through,
-and we got burnt pretty much all over, in places, and eyes put out
-with the smoke; because, you see, we didn't want nothing but a crust,
-and we couldn't prop it up right, and she would always cave in. But of
-course we thought of the right way at last--which was to cook the
-ladder, too, in the pie. So then we laid in with Jim the second night,
-and tore up the sheet all in little strings and twisted them together,
-and long before daylight we had a lovely rope that you could 'a' hung
-a person with. We let on it took nine months to make it.
-
-And in the forenoon we took it down to the woods, but it wouldn't go
-into the pie. Being made of a whole sheet, that way, there was rope
-enough for forty pies if we'd 'a' wanted them, and plenty left over
-for soup, or sausage, or anything you choose. We could 'a' had a whole
-dinner.
-
-But we didn't need it. All we needed was just enough for the pie, and
-so we throwed the rest away. We didn't cook none of the pies in the
-washpan--afraid the solder would melt; but Uncle Silas he had a noble
-brass warming-pan which he thought considerable of, because it
-belonged to one of his ancesters with a long wooden handle that come
-over from England with William the Conqueror in the _Mayflower_ or one
-of them early ships and was hid away up garret with a lot of other old
-pots and things that was valuable, not on account of being any
-account, because they warn't, but on account of them being relicts,
-you know, and we snaked her out, private, and took her down there, but
-she failed on the first pies, because we didn't know how, but she come
-up smiling on the last one. We took and lined her with dough, and set
-her in the coals, and loaded her up with rag rope, and put on a dough
-roof, and shut down the lid, and put hot embers on top, and stood off
-five foot, with the long handle, cool and comfortable, and in fifteen
-minutes she turned out a pie that was a satisfaction to look at. But
-the person that et it would want to fetch a couple of kags of
-toothpicks along, for if that rope ladder wouldn't cramp him down to
-business I don't know nothing what I'm talking about, and lay him in
-enough stomach-ache to last him till next time, too. Nat didn't look
-when we put the witch pie in Jim's pan; and we put the three tin
-plates in the bottom of the pan under the vittles; and so Jim got
-everything all right, and as soon as he was by himself he busted into
-the pie and hid the rope ladder inside of his straw tick, and
-scratched some marks on a tin plate and throwed it out of the
-window-hole.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXVIII
-
-
-Making them pens was a distressid tough job, and so was the saw; and
-Jim allowed the inscription was going to be the toughest of all.
-That's the one which the prisoner has to scrabble on the wall. But he
-had to have it; Tom said he'd _got_ to; there warn't no case of a
-state prisoner not scrabbling his inscription to leave behind, and his
-coat of arms.
-
-"Look at Lady Jane Grey," he says; "look at Gilford Dudley; look at
-old Northumberland! Why, Huck, s'pose it _is_ considerble
-trouble?--what you going to do?--how you going to get around it? Jim's
-_got_ to do his inscription and coat of arms. They all do."
-
-Jim says:
-
-"Why, Mars Tom, I hain't got no coat o' arm; I hain't got nuffn but
-dish yer ole shirt, en you knows I got to keep de journal on dat."
-
-"Oh, you don't understand, Jim; a coat of arms is very different."
-
-"Well," I says, "Jim's right, anyway, when he says he ain't got no
-coat of arms, because he hain't."
-
-"I reckon I knowed that," Tom says, "but you bet he'll have one before
-he goes out of this--because he's going out _right_, and there ain't
-going to be no flaws in his record."
-
-So whilst me and Jim filed away at the pens on a brickbat apiece, Jim
-a-making his'n out of the brass and I making mine out of the spoon,
-Tom set to work to think out the coat of arms. By and by he said he'd
-struck so many good ones he didn't hardly know which to take, but
-there was one which he reckoned he'd decide on. He says:
-
-"On the scutcheon we'll have a bend _or_ in the dexter base, a saltire
-_murrey_ in the fess, with a dog, couchant, for common charge, and
-under his foot a chain embattled, for slavery, with a chevron _vert_
-in a chief engrailed, and three invected lines on a field _azure_,
-with the nombril points rampant on a dancette indented; crest, a
-runaway nigger, _sable_, with his bundle over his shoulder on a bar
-sinister; and a couple of gules for supporters, which is you and me;
-motto, _Maggiore fretta, minore atto_. Got it out of a book--means the
-more haste the less speed."
-
-"Geewhillikins," I says, "but what does the rest of it mean?"
-
-"We ain't got no time to bother over that," he says; "we got to dig in
-like all git-out."
-
-"Well, anyway," I says, "what's _some_ of it? What's a fess?"
-
-"A fess--a fess is--_you_ don't need to know what a fess is. I'll show
-him how to make it when he gets to it."
-
-"Shucks, Tom," I says, "I think you might tell a person. What's a bar
-sinister?"
-
-"Oh, I don't know. But he's got to have it. All the nobility does."
-
-That was just his way. If it didn't suit him to explain a thing to
-you, he wouldn't do it. You might pump at him a week, it wouldn't make
-no difference. He'd got all that coat-of-arms business fixed, so now
-he started in to finish up the rest of that part of the work, which
-was to plan out a mournful inscription--said Jim got to have one, like
-they all done. He made up a lot, and wrote them out on a paper, and
-read them off, so:
-
-  _1. Here a captive heart busted.
-
-   2. Here a poor prisoner, forsook by the world and
-   friends, fretted his sorrowful life.
-
-   3. Here a lonely heart broke, and a worn spirit went
-   to its rest, after thirty-seven years of solitary captivity.
-
-   4. Here, homeless and friendless, after thirty-seven
-   years of bitter captivity, perished a noble stranger,
-   natural son of Louis XIV._
-
-Tom's voice trembled whilst he was reading them, and he most broke
-down. When he got done he couldn't no way make up his mind which one
-for Jim to scrabble onto the wall, they was all so good; but at last
-he allowed he would let him scrabble them all on. Jim said it would
-take him a year to scrabble such a lot of truck onto the logs with a
-nail, and he didn't know how to make letters, besides; but Tom said he
-would block them out for him, and then he wouldn't have nothing to do
-but just follow the lines. Then pretty soon he says:
-
-"Come to think, the logs ain't a-going to do; they don't have log
-walls in a dungeon: we got to dig the inscriptions into a rock. We'll
-fetch a rock." Jim said the rock was worse than the logs; he said it
-would take him such a pison long time to dig them into a rock he
-wouldn't ever get out. But Tom said he would let me help him do it.
-Then he took a look to see how me and Jim was getting along with the
-pens. It was most pesky tedious hard work and slow, and didn't give my
-hands no show to get well of the sores, and we didn't seem to make no
-headway, hardly; so Tom says:
-
-"I know how to fix it. We got to have a rock for the coat of arms and
-mournful inscriptions, and we can kill two birds with that same rock.
-There's a gaudy big grindstone down at the mill, and we'll smouch it,
-and carve the things on it, and file out the pens and the saw on it,
-too."
-
-It warn't no slouch of an idea; and it warn't no slouch of a
-grindstone nuther; but we allowed we'd tackle it. It warn't quite
-midnight yet, so we cleared out for the mill, leaving Jim at work. We
-smouched the grindstone, and set out to roll her home, but it was a
-most nation tough job. Sometimes, do what we could, we couldn't keep
-her from falling over, and she come mighty near mashing us every time.
-Tom said she was going to get one of us, sure, before we got through.
-We got her halfway; and then we was plumb played out, and most
-drownded with sweat. We see it warn't no use; we got to go and fetch
-Jim. So he raised up his bed and slid the chain off of the bed-leg,
-and wrapt it round and round his neck, and we crawled out through our
-hole and down there, and Jim and me laid into that grindstone and
-walked her along like nothing; and Tom superintended. He could
-out-superintend any boy I ever see. He knowed how to do everything.
-
-Our hole was pretty big, but it warn't big enough to get the
-grindstone through; but Jim he took the pick and soon made it big
-enough. Then Tom marked out them things on it with the nail, and set
-Jim to work on them, with the nail for a chisel and an iron bolt from
-the rubbage in the lean-to for a hammer, and told him to work till the
-rest of his candle quit on him, and then he could go to bed, and hide
-the grindstone under his straw tick and sleep on it. Then we helped
-him fix his chain back on the bed-leg, and was ready for bed
-ourselves. But Tom thought of something, and says:
-
-"You got any spiders in here, Jim?"
-
-"No, sah, thanks to goodness I hain't, Mars Tom."
-
-"All right, we'll get you some."
-
-"But bless you, honey, I doan' _want_ none. I's afeard un um. I jis'
-'s soon have rattlesnakes aroun'."
-
-Tom thought a minute or two, and says:
-
-"It's a good idea. And I reckon it's been done. It _must_ 'a' been
-done; it stands to reason. Yes, it's a prime good idea. Where could
-you keep it?"
-
-"Keep what, Mars Tom?"
-
-"Why, a rattlesnake."
-
-"De goodness gracious alive, Mars Tom! Why, if dey was a rattlesnake
-to come in heah I'd take en bust right out thoo dat log wall, I would,
-wid my head."
-
-"Why, Jim, you wouldn't be afraid of it after a little. You could tame
-it."
-
-"_Tame_ it!"
-
-"Yes--easy enough. Every animal is grateful for kindness and petting,
-and they wouldn't _think_ of hurting a person that pets them. Any book
-will tell you that. You try--that's all I ask; just try for two or
-three days. Why, you can get him so in a little while that he'll love
-you; and sleep with you; and won't stay away from you a minute; and
-will let you wrap him round your neck and put his head in your mouth."
-
-"_Please_, Tom--_doan_' talk so! I can't _stan'_ it! He'd _let_ me
-shove his head in my mouf--fer a favor, hain't it? I lay he'd wait a
-pow'ful long time 'fo' I _ast_ him. En mo' en dat, I doan' _want_ him
-to sleep wid me."
-
-"Jim, don't act so foolish. A prisoner's _got_ to have some kind of a
-dumb pet, and if a rattlesnake hain't ever been tried, why, there's
-more glory to be gained in your being the first to ever try it than
-any other way you could ever think of to save your life."
-
-"Why, Mars Tom, I doan' _want_ no sich glory. Snake take 'n bite Jim's
-chin off, den _whah_ is de glory? No, sah, I doan' want no sich
-doin's."
-
-"Blame it, can't you _try?_ I only _want_ you to try--you needn't keep
-it up if it don't work."
-
-"But de trouble all _done_ ef de snake bite me while I's a-tryin' him.
-Mars Tom, I's willin' to tackle mos' anything 'at ain't onreasonable,
-but ef you en Huck fetches a rattlesnake in heah for me to tame, I's
-gwyne to _leave_, dat's _shore_."
-
-"Well, then, let it go, let it go, if you're so bull-headed about it.
-We can get you some garter-snakes, and you can tie some buttons on
-their tails, and let on they're rattlesnakes, and I reckon that 'll
-have to do."
-
-"I k'n stan' _dem_, Mars Tom, but blame' 'f I couldn' get along widout
-um, I tell you dat. I never knowed b'fo' 'twas so much bother and
-trouble to be a prisoner."
-
-"Well, it _always_ is when it's done right. You got any rats around
-here?"
-
-"No, sah, I hain't seed none."
-
-"Well, we'll get you some rats."
-
-"Why, Mars Tom, I doan' _want_ no rats. Dey's de dadblamedest creturs
-to 'sturb a body, en rustle roun' over 'im, en bite his feet, when
-he's tryin' to sleep, I ever see. No, sah, gimme g'yarter-snakes, 'f
-I's got to have 'm, but doan' gimme no rats; I hain' got no use f'r
-um, skasely."
-
-"But, Jim, you _got_ to have 'em--they all do. So don't make no more
-fuss about it. Prisoners ain't ever without rats. There ain't no
-instance of it. And they train them, and pet them, and learn them
-tricks, and they get to be as sociable as flies. But you got to play
-music to them. You got anything to play music on?"
-
-"I ain' got nuffn but a coase comb en a piece o' paper, en a
-juice-harp; but I reck'n dey wouldn' take no stock in a juice-harp."
-
-"Yes they would. _They_ don't care what kind of music 'tis. A
-jews-harp's plenty good enough for a rat. All animals like music--in a
-prison they dote on it. Specially, painful music; and you can't get no
-other kind out of a jew's-harp. It always interests them; they come
-out to see what's the matter with you. Yes, you're all right; you're
-fixed very well. You want to set on your bed nights before you go to
-sleep, and early in the mornings, and play your jew's-harp; play 'The
-Last Link is Broken'--that's the thing that 'll scoop a rat quicker 'n
-anything else; and when you've played about two minutes you'll see all
-the rats, and the snakes, and spiders and things begin to feel worried
-about you, and come. And they'll just fairly swarm over you, and have
-a noble good time."
-
-"Yes, _dey_ will, I reck'n, Mars Tom, but what kine er time is _Jim_
-havin'? Blest if I kin see de pint. But I'll do it ef I got to. I
-reck'n I better keep de animals satisfied, en not have no trouble in
-de house."
-
-Tom waited to think it over, and see if there wasn't nothing else; and
-pretty soon he says:
-
-"Oh, there's one thing I forgot. Could you raise a flower here, do you
-reckon?"
-
-"I doan' know but maybe I could, Mars Tom; but it's tolable dark in
-heah, en I ain' got no use f'r no flower, nohow, en she'd be a pow'ful
-sight o' trouble."
-
-"Well, you try it, anyway. Some other prisoners has done it."
-
-"One er dem big cat-tail-lookin' mullen-stalks would grow in heah,
-Mars Tom, I reck'n, but she wouldn't be wuth half de trouble she'd
-coss."
-
-"Don't you believe it. We'll fetch you a little one and you plant it
-in the corner over there, and raise it. And don't call it mullen, call
-it Pitchiola--that's its right name when it's in a prison. And you
-want to water it with your tears."
-
-"Why, I got plenty spring water, Mars Tom."
-
-"You don't _want_ spring water; you want to water it with your tears.
-It's the way they always do."
-
-"Why, Mars Tom, I lay I kin raise one er dem mullen-stalks twyste wid
-spring water whiles another man's a start'n one wid tears."
-
-"That ain't the idea. You _got_ to do it with tears."
-
-"She'll die on my han's, Mars Tom, she sholy will; kase I doan'
-skasely ever cry."
-
-So Tom was stumped. But he studied it over, and then said Jim would
-have to worry along the best he could with an onion. He promised he
-would go to the nigger cabins and drop one, private, in Jim's
-coffee-pot, in the morning. Jim said he would "jis' 's soon have
-tobacker in his coffee"; and found so much fault with it, and with the
-work and bother of raising the mullen, and jew's-harping the rats, and
-petting and flattering up the snakes and spiders and things, on top of
-all the other work he had to do on pens, and inscriptions, and
-journals, and things, which made it more trouble and worry and
-responsibility to be a prisoner than anything he ever undertook, that
-Tom most lost all patience with him; and said he was just loadened
-down with more gaudier chances than a prisoner ever had in the world
-to make a name for himself, and yet he didn't know enough to
-appreciate them, and they was just about wasted on him. So Jim he was
-sorry, and said he wouldn't behave so no more, and then me and Tom
-shoved for bed.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXXIX
-
-
-In the morning we went up to the village and bought a wire rat-trap
-and fetched it down, and unstopped the best rat-hole, and in about an
-hour we had fifteen of the bulliest kind of ones; and then we took it
-and put it in a safe place under Aunt Sally's bed. But while we was
-gone for spiders little Thomas Franklin Benjamin Jefferson Elexander
-Phelps found it there, and opened the door of it to see if the rats
-would come out, and they did; and Aunt Sally she come in, and when we
-got back she was a-standing on top of the bed raising Cain, and the
-rats was doing what they could to keep off the dull times for her. So
-she took and dusted us both with the hickry, and we was as much as two
-hours catching another fifteen or sixteen, drat that meddlesome cub,
-and they warn't the likeliest, nuther, because the first haul was the
-pick of the flock. I never see a likelier lot of rats than what that
-first haul was.
-
-We got a splendid stock of sorted spiders, and bugs, and frogs, and
-caterpillars, and one thing or another; and we like to got a hornet's
-nest, but we didn't. The family was at home. We didn't give it right
-up, but stayed with them as long as we could; because we allowed we'd
-tire them out or they'd got to tire us out, and they done it. Then we
-got allycumpain and rubbed on the places, and was pretty near all
-right again, but couldn't set down convenient. And so we went for the
-snakes, and grabbed a couple of dozen garters and house-snakes, and
-put them in a bag, and put it in our room, and by that time it was
-supper-time, and a rattling good honest day's work: and hungry?--oh,
-no, I reckon not! And there warn't a blessed snake up there when we
-went back--we didn't half tie the sack, and they worked out somehow,
-and left. But it didn't matter much, because they was still on the
-premises somewheres. So we judged we could get some of them again. No,
-there warn't no real scarcity of snakes about the house for a
-considerable spell. You'd see them dripping from the rafters and
-places every now and then; and they generly landed in your plate, or
-down the back of your neck, and most of the time where you didn't want
-them. Well, they was handsome and striped, and there warn't no harm in
-a million of them; but that never made no difference to Aunt Sally;
-she despised snakes, be the breed what they might, and she couldn't
-stand them no way you could fix it; and every time one of them flopped
-down on her, it didn't make no difference what she was doing, she
-would just lay that work down and light out. I never see such a woman.
-And you could hear her whoop to Jericho. You couldn't get her to take
-a-holt of one of them with the tongs. And if she turned over and found
-one in bed she would scramble out and lift a howl that you would think
-the house was afire. She disturbed the old man so that he said he
-could most wish there hadn't ever been no snakes created. Why, after
-every last snake had been gone clear out of the house for as much as a
-week Aunt Sally warn't over it yet; she warn't near over it; when she
-was setting thinking about something you could touch her on the back
-of her neck with a feather and she would jump right out of her
-stockings. It was very curious. But Tom said all women was just so. He
-said they was made that way for some reason or other.
-
-We got a licking every time one of our snakes come in her way, and she
-allowed these lickings warn't nothing to what she would do if we ever
-loaded up the place again with them. I didn't mind the lickings,
-because they didn't amount to nothing; but I minded the trouble we had
-to lay in another lot. But we got them laid in, and all the other
-things; and you never see a cabin as blithesome as Jim's was when
-they'd all swarm out for music and go for him. Jim didn't like the
-spiders, and the spiders didn't like Jim; and so they'd lay for him,
-and make it mighty warm for him. And he said that between the rats and
-the snakes and the grindstone there warn't no room in bed for him,
-skasely; and when there was, a body couldn't sleep, it was so lively,
-and it was always lively, he said, because _they_ never all slept at
-one time, but took turn about, so when the snakes was asleep the rats
-was on deck, and when the rats turned in the snakes come on watch, so
-he always had one gang under him, in his way, and t'other gang having
-a circus over him, and if he got up to hunt a new place the spiders
-would take a chance at him as he crossed over. He said if he ever got
-out this time he wouldn't ever be a prisoner again, not for a salary.
-
-Well, by the end of three weeks everything was in pretty good shape.
-The shirt was sent in early, in a pie, and every time a rat bit Jim he
-would get up and write a line in his journal whilst the ink was fresh;
-the pens was made, the inscriptions and so on was all carved on the
-grindstone; the bed-leg was sawed in two, and we had et up the
-sawdust, and it give us a most amazing stomach-ache. We reckoned we
-was all going to die, but didn't. It was the most undigestible sawdust
-I ever see; and Tom said the same. But as I was saying, we'd got all
-the work done now, at last; and we was all pretty much fagged out,
-too, but mainly Jim. The old man had wrote a couple of times to the
-plantation below Orleans to come and get their runaway nigger, but
-hadn't got no answer, because there warn't no such plantation; so he
-allowed he would advertise Jim in the St. Louis and New Orleans
-papers; and when he mentioned the St. Louis ones it give me the cold
-shivers, and I see we hadn't no time to lose. So Tom said, now for the
-nonnamous letters.
-
-"What's them?" I says.
-
-"Warnings to the people that something is up. Sometimes it's done one
-way, sometimes another. But there's always somebody spying around that
-gives notice to the governor of the castle. When Louis XVI. was going
-to light out of the Tooleries a servant-girl done it. It's a very good
-way, and so is the nonnamous letters. We'll use them both. And it's
-usual for the prisoner's mother to change clothes with him, and she
-stays in, and he slides out in her clothes. We'll do that, too."
-
-"But looky here, Tom, what do we want to _warn_ anybody for that
-something's up? Let them find it out for themselves--it's their
-lookout."
-
-"Yes, I know; but you can't depend on them. It's the way they've acted
-from the very start--left us to do _everything_. They're so confiding
-and mullet-headed they don't take notice of nothing at all. So if we
-don't _give_ them notice there won't be nobody nor nothing to
-interfere with us, and so after all our hard work and trouble this
-escape 'll go off perfectly flat; won't amount to nothing--won't be
-nothing _to_ it."
-
-"Well, as for me, Tom, that's the way I'd like."
-
-"Shucks!" he says, and looked disgusted. So I says:
-
-"But I ain't going to make no complaint. Any way that suits you suits
-me. What you going to do about the servant-girl?"
-
-"You'll be her. You slide in, in the middle of the night, and hook
-that yaller girl's frock."
-
-"Why, Tom, that 'll make trouble next morning; because, of course, she
-prob'bly hain't got any but that one."
-
-"I know; but you don't want it but fifteen minutes, to carry the
-nonnamous letter and shove it under the front door."
-
-"All right, then, I'll do it; but I could carry it just as handy in my
-own togs."
-
-"You wouldn't look like a servant-girl _then_, would you?"
-
-"No, but there won't be nobody to see what I look like, _anyway_."
-
-"That ain't got nothing to do with it. The thing for us to do is just
-to do our _duty_, and not worry about whether anybody _sees_ us do it
-or not. Hain't you got no principle at all?"
-
-"All right, I ain't saying nothing; I'm the servant-girl. Who's Jim's
-mother?"
-
-"I'm his mother. I'll hook a gown from Aunt Sally."
-
-"Well, then, you'll have to stay in the cabin when me and Jim leaves."
-
-"Not much. I'll stuff Jim's clothes full of straw and lay it on his
-bed to represent his mother in disguise, and Jim 'll take the nigger
-woman's gown off of me and wear it, and we'll all evade together. When
-a prisoner of style escapes it's called an evasion. It's always called
-so when a king escapes, f'rinstance. And the same with a king's son;
-it don't make no difference whether he's a natural one or an unnatural
-one."
-
-So Tom he wrote the nonnamous letter, and I smouched the yaller
-wench's frock that night, and put it on, and shoved it under the front
-door, the way Tom told me to. It said:
-
-   _Beware. Trouble is brewing. Keep a sharp lookout.
-      UNKNOWN FRIEND._
-
-Next night we stuck a picture, which Tom drawed in blood, of a skull
-and crossbones on the front door; and next night another one of a
-coffin on the back door. I never see a family in such a sweat. They
-couldn't 'a' been worse scared if the place had 'a' been full of
-ghosts laying for them behind everything and under the beds and
-shivering through the air. If a door banged, Aunt Sally she jumped and
-said "ouch!" if anything fell, she jumped and said "ouch!" if you
-happened to touch her, when she warn't noticing, she done the same;
-she couldn't face no way and be satisfied, because she allowed there
-was something behind her every time--so she was always a-whirling
-around sudden, and saying "ouch," and before she'd got two-thirds
-around she'd whirl back again, and say it again; and she was afraid to
-go to bed, but she dasn't set up. So the thing was working very well,
-Tom said; he said he never see a thing work more satisfactory. He said
-it showed it was done right.
-
-So he said, now for the grand bulge! So the very next morning at the
-streak of dawn we got another letter ready, and was wondering what we
-better do with it, because we heard them say at supper they was going
-to have a nigger on watch at both doors all night. Tom he went down
-the lightning-rod to spy around; and the nigger at the back door was
-asleep, and he stuck it in the back of his neck and come back. This
-letter said:
-
-_Don't betray me, I wish to be your friend. There is a desprate gang
-of cutthroats from over in the Indian Territory going to steal your
-runaway nigger to-night, and they have been trying to scare you so as
-you will stay in the house and not bother them. I am one of the gang,
-but have got religgion and wish to quit it and lead an honest life
-again, and will betray the helish design. They will sneak down from
-northards, along the fence, at midnight exact, with a false key, and
-go in the nigger's cabin to get him. I am to be off a piece and blow a
-tin horn if I see any danger; but stead of that I will BA like a sheep
-soon as they get in and not blow at all; then whilst they are getting
-his chains loose, you slip there and lock them in, and can kill them
-at your leasure. Don't do anything but just the way I am telling you;
-if you do they will suspicion something and raise whoop-jamboreehoo. I
-do not wish any reward but to know I have done the right thing.
-
-UNKNOWN FRIEND._
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XL
-
-
-We was feeling pretty good after breakfast, and took my canoe and went
-over the river a-fishing, with a lunch, and had a good time, and took
-a look at the raft and found her all right, and got home late to
-supper, and found them in such a sweat and worry they didn't know
-which end they was standing on, and made us go right off to bed the
-minute we was done supper, and wouldn't tell us what the trouble was,
-and never let on a word about the new letter, but didn't need to,
-because we knowed as much about it as anybody did, and as soon as we
-was half up-stairs and her back was turned we slid for the cellar
-cubboard and loaded up a good lunch and took it up to our room and
-went to bed, and got up about half past eleven, and Tom put on Aunt
-Sally's dress that he stole and was going to start with the lunch, but
-says:
-
-"Where's the butter?"
-
-"I laid out a hunk of it," I says, "on a piece of a corn-pone."
-
-"Well, you _left_ it laid out, then--it ain't here."
-
-"We can get along without it," I says.
-
-"We can get along _with_ it, too," he says; "just you slide down
-cellar and fetch it. And then mosey right down the lightning-rod and
-come along. I'll go and stuff the straw into Jim's clothes to
-represent his mother in disguise, and be ready to _ba_ like a sheep
-and shove soon as you get there."
-
-So out he went, and down cellar went I. The hunk of butter, big as a
-person's fist, was where I had left it, so I took up the slab of
-corn-pone with it on, and blowed out my light, and started up-stairs
-very stealthy, and got up to the main floor all right, but here comes
-Aunt Sally with a candle, and I clapped the truck in my hat, and
-clapped my hat on my head, and the next second she see me; and she
-says:
-
-"You been down cellar?"
-
-"Yes'm."
-
-"What you been doing down there?"
-
-"Noth'n."
-
-"_Noth'n!_"
-
-"No'm."
-
-"Well, then, what possessed you to go down there this time of night?"
-
-"I don't know 'm."
-
-"You don't _know?_ Don't answer me that way. Tom, I want to know what
-you been _doing_ down there."
-
-"I hain't been doing a single thing, Aunt Sally, I hope to gracious if
-I have."
-
-I reckoned she'd let me go now, and as a generl thing she would; but I
-s'pose there was so many strange things going on she was just in a
-sweat about every little thing that warn't yard-stick straight; so she
-says, very decided:
-
-"You just march into that setting-room and stay there till I come. You
-been up to something you no business to, and I lay I'll find out what
-it is before _I'm_ done with you."
-
-So she went away as I opened the door and walked into the
-setting-room. My, but there was a crowd there! Fifteen farmers, and
-every one of them had a gun. I was most powerful sick, and slunk to a
-chair and set down. They was setting around, some of them talking a
-little, in a low voice, and all of them fidgety and uneasy, but trying
-to look like they warn't; but I knowed they was, because they was
-always taking off their hats, and putting them on, and scratching
-their heads, and changing their seats, and fumbling with their
-buttons. I warn't easy myself, but I didn't take my hat off, all the
-same.
-
-I did wish Aunt Sally would come, and get done with me, and lick me,
-if she wanted to, and let me get away and tell Tom how we'd overdone
-this thing, and what a thundering hornet's nest we'd got ourselves
-into, so we could stop fooling around straight off, and clear out with
-Jim before these rips got out of patience and come for us.
-
-At last she come and begun to ask me questions, but I _couldn't_
-answer them straight, I didn't know which end of me was up; because
-these men was in such a fidget now that some was wanting to start
-right _now_ and lay for them desperadoes, and saying it warn't but a
-few minutes to midnight; and others was trying to get them to hold on
-and wait for the sheep-signal; and here was Aunty pegging away at the
-questions, and me a-shaking all over and ready to sink down in my
-tracks I was that scared; and the place getting hotter and hotter, and
-the butter beginning to melt and run down my neck and behind my ears;
-and pretty soon, when one of them says, "_I'm_ for going and getting
-in the cabin _first_ and right _now_, and catching them when they
-come," I most dropped; and a streak of butter come a-trickling down my
-forehead, and Aunt Sally she see it, and turns white as a sheet, and
-says:
-
-"For the land's sake, what _is_ the matter with the child? He's got
-the brain-fever as shore as you're born, and they're oozing out!"
-
-And everybody runs to see, and she snatches off my hat, and out comes
-the bread and what was left of the butter, and she grabbed me, and
-hugged me, and says:
-
-"Oh, what a turn you did give me! and how glad and grateful I am it
-ain't no worse; for luck's against us, and it never rains but it
-pours, and when I see that truck I thought we'd lost you, for I knowed
-by the color and all it was just like your brains would be if--Dear,
-dear, whyd'nt you _tell_ me that was what you'd been down there for,
-_I_ wouldn't 'a' cared. Now cler out to bed, and don't lemme see no
-more of you till morning!"
-
-I was up-stairs in a second, and down the lightning-rod in another
-one, and shinning through the dark for the lean-to. I couldn't hardly
-get my words out, I was so anxious; but I told Tom as quick as I could
-we must jump for it now, and not a minute to lose--the house full of
-men, yonder, with guns!
-
-His eyes just blazed; and he says:
-
-"No!--is that so? _Ain't_ it bully! Why, Huck, if it was to do over
-again, I bet I could fetch two hundred! If we could put it off till--"
-
-"Hurry! _hurry!_" I says. "Where's Jim?"
-
-"Right at your elbow; if you reach out your arm you can touch him.
-He's dressed, and everything's ready. Now we'll slide out and give the
-sheep-signal."
-
-But then we heard the tramp of men coming to the door, and heard them
-begin to fumble with the padlock, and heard a man say:
-
-"I _told_ you we'd be too soon; they haven't come--the door is locked.
-Here, I'll lock some of you into the cabin, and you lay for 'em in the
-dark and kill 'em when they come; and the rest scatter around a piece,
-and listen if you can hear 'em coming."
-
-So in they come, but couldn't see us in the dark, and most trod on us
-whilst we was hustling to get under the bed. But we got under all
-right, and out through the hole, swift but soft--Jim first, me next,
-and Tom last, which was according to Tom's orders. Now we was in the
-lean-to, and heard trampings close by outside. So we crept to the
-door, and Tom stopped us there and put his eye to the crack, but
-couldn't make out nothing, it was so dark; and whispered and said he
-would listen for the steps to get further, and when he nudged us Jim
-must glide out first, and him last. So he set his ear to the crack and
-listened, and listened, and listened, and the steps a-scraping around
-out there all the time; and at last he nudged us, and we slid out, and
-stooped down, not breathing, and not making the least noise, and
-slipped stealthy towards the fence in Injun file, and got to it all
-right, and me and Jim over it; but Tom's britches catched fast on a
-splinter on the top rail, and then he hear the steps coming, so he had
-to pull loose, which snapped the splinter and made a noise; and as he
-dropped in our tracks and started somebody sings out:
-
-"Who's that? Answer, or I'll shoot!"
-
-But we didn't answer; we just unfurled our heels and shoved. Then
-there was a rush, and a _bang,_ _bang,_ _bang!_ and the bullets fairly
-whizzed around us! We heard them sing out:
-
-"Here they are! They've broke for the river! After 'em, boys, and turn
-loose the dogs!"
-
-So here they come, full tilt. We could hear them because they wore
-boots and yelled, but we didn't wear no boots and didn't yell. We was
-in the path to the mill; and when they got pretty close onto us we
-dodged into the bush and let them go by, and then dropped in behind
-them. They'd had all the dogs shut up, so they wouldn't scare off the
-robbers; but by this time somebody had let them loose, and here they
-come, making powwow enough for a million; but they was our dogs; so we
-stopped in our tracks till they catched up; and when they see it
-warn't nobody but us, and no excitement to offer them, they only just
-said howdy, and tore right ahead towards the shouting and clattering;
-and then we up-steam again, and whizzed along after them till we was
-nearly to the mill, and then struck up through the bush to where my
-canoe was tied, and hopped in and pulled for dear life towards the
-middle of the river, but didn't make no more noise than we was
-obleeged to. Then we struck out, easy and comfortable, for the island
-where my raft was; and we could hear them yelling and barking at each
-other all up and down the bank, till we was so far away the sounds got
-dim and died out. And when we stepped onto the raft I says:
-
-"Now, old Jim, you're a free man _again_, and I bet you won't ever be
-a slave no more."
-
-"En a mighty good job it wuz, too, Huck. It 'uz planned beautiful, en
-it 'uz _done_ beautiful; en dey ain't _nobody_ kin git up a plan dat's
-mo' mixed up en splendid den what dat one wuz."
-
-We was all glad as we could be, but Tom was the gladdest of all
-because he had a bullet in the calf of his leg.
-
-When me and Jim heard that we didn't feel as brash as what we did
-before. It was hurting him considerable, and bleeding; so we laid him
-in the wigwam and tore up one of the duke's shirts for to bandage him,
-but he says:
-
-"Gimme the rags; I can do it myself. Don't stop now; don't fool around
-here, and the evasion booming along so handsome; man the sweeps, and
-set her loose! Boys, we done it elegant!--'deed we did. I wish _we'd_
-'a' had the handling of Louis XVI., there wouldn't 'a' been no 'Son of
-Saint Louis, ascend to heaven!' wrote down in _his_ biography; no,
-sir, we'd 'a' whooped him over the _border_--that's what we'd 'a' done
-with _him_--and done it just as slick as nothing at all, too. Man the
-sweeps--man the sweeps!"
-
-
-But me and Jim was consulting--and thinking. And after we'd thought a
-minute, I says:
-
-"Say it, Jim."
-
-So he says:
-
-"Well, den, dis is de way it look to me, Huck. Ef it wuz _him_ dat 'uz
-bein' sot free, en one er de boys wuz to git shot, would he say, 'Go
-on en save me, nemmine 'bout a doctor f'r to save dis one'? Is dat
-like Mars Tom Sawyer? Would he say dat? You _bet_ he wouldn't! _Well_,
-den, is _Jim_ gywne to say it? No, sah--I doan' budge a step out'n dis
-place 'dout a _doctor_; not if it's forty year!"
-
-I knowed he was white inside, and I reckoned he'd say what he did
-say--so it was all right now, and I told Tom I was a-going for a
-doctor. He raised considerable row about it, but me and Jim stuck to
-it and wouldn't budge; so he was for crawling out and setting the raft
-loose himself; but we wouldn't let him. Then he give us a piece of his
-mind, but it didn't do no good.
-
-So when he sees me getting the canoe ready, he says:
-
-"Well, then, if you're bound to go, I'll tell you the way to do when
-you get to the village. Shut the door and blindfold the doctor tight
-and fast, and make him swear to be silent as the grave, and put a
-purse full of gold in his hand, and then take and lead him all around
-the back alleys and everywheres in the dark, and then fetch him here
-in the canoe, in a roundabout way amongst the islands, and search him
-and take his chalk away from him, and don't give it back to him till
-you get him back to the village, or else he will chalk this raft so he
-can find it again. It's the way they all do."
-
-So I said I would, and left, and Jim was to hide in the woods when he
-see the doctor coming till he was gone again.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XLI
-
-
-The doctor was an old man; a very nice, kind-looking old man when I
-got him up. I told him me and my brother was over on Spanish Island
-hunting yesterday afternoon, and camped on a piece of a raft we found,
-and about midnight he must 'a' kicked his gun in his dreams, for it
-went off and shot him in the leg, and we wanted him to go over there
-and fix it and not say nothing about it, nor let anybody know, because
-we wanted to come home this evening and surprise the folks.
-
-"Who is your folks?" he says.
-
-"The Phelpses, down yonder."
-
-"Oh," he says. And after a minute, he says:
-
-"How'd you say he got shot?"
-
-"He had a dream," I says, "and it shot him."
-
-"Singular dream," he says.
-
-So he lit up his lantern, and got his saddle-bags, and we started. But
-when he see the canoe he didn't like the look of her--said she was big
-enough for one, but didn't look pretty safe for two. I says:
-
-"Oh, you needn't be afeard, sir, she carried the three of us easy
-enough."
-
-"What three?"
-
-"Why, me and Sid, and--and--and _the guns_; that's what I mean."
-
-"Oh," he says.
-
-But he put his foot on the gunnel and rocked her, and shook his head,
-and said he reckoned he'd look around for a bigger one. But they was
-all locked and chained; so he took my canoe, and said for me to wait
-till he come back, or I could hunt around further, or maybe I better
-go down home and get them ready for the surprise if I wanted to. But I
-said I didn't; so I told him just how to find the raft, and then he
-started.
-
-I struck an idea pretty soon. I says to myself, spos'n he can't fix
-that leg just in three shakes of a sheep's tail, as the saying is?
-spos'n it takes him three or four days? What are we going to do?--lay
-around there till he lets the cat out of the bag? No, sir; I know what
-_I'll_ do. I'll wait, and when he comes back if he says he's got to go
-any more I'll get down there, too, if I swim; and we'll take and tie
-him, and keep him, and shove out down the river; and when Tom's done
-with him we'll give him what it's worth, or all we got, and then let
-him get ashore.
-
-So then I crept into a lumber-pile to get some sleep; and next time I
-waked up the sun was away up over my head! I shot out and went for the
-doctor's house, but they told me he'd gone away in the night some time
-or other, and warn't back yet. Well, thinks I, that looks powerful bad
-for Tom, and I'll dig out for the island right off. So away I shoved,
-and turned the corner, and nearly rammed my head into Uncle Silas's
-stomach! He says:
-
-"Why, _Tom!_ Where you been all this time, you rascal?"
-
-"_I_ hain't been nowheres," I says, "only just hunting for the runaway
-nigger--me and Sid."
-
-"Why, where ever did you go?" he says. "Your aunt's been mighty
-uneasy."
-
-"She needn't," I says, "because we was all right. We followed the men
-and the dogs, but they outrun us, and we lost them; but we thought we
-heard them on the water, so we got a canoe and took out after them and
-crossed over, but couldn't find nothing of them; so we cruised along
-up-shore till we got kind of tired and beat out; and tied up the canoe
-and went to sleep, and never waked up till about an hour ago; then we
-paddled over here to hear the news, and Sid's at the post-office to
-see what he can hear, and I'm a-branching out to get something to eat
-for us, and then we're going home."
-
-So then we went to the post-office to get "Sid"; but just as I
-suspicioned, he warn't there; so the old man he got a letter out of
-the office, and we waited awhile longer, but Sid didn't come; so the
-old man said, come along, let Sid foot it home, or canoe it, when he
-got done fooling around--but we would ride. I couldn't get him to let
-me stay and wait for Sid; and he said there warn't no use in it, and I
-must come along, and let Aunt Sally see we was all right.
-
-When we got home Aunt Sally was that glad to see me she laughed and
-cried both, and hugged me, and give me one of them lickings of hern
-that don't amount to shucks, and said she'd serve Sid the same when he
-come.
-
-And the place was plum full of farmers and farmers' wives, to dinner;
-and such another clack a body never heard. Old Mrs. Hotchkiss was the
-worst; her tongue was a-going all the time. She says:
-
-"Well, Sister Phelps, I've ransacked that-air cabin over, an' I
-b'lieve the nigger was crazy. I says to Sister Damrell--didn't I,
-Sister Damrell?--s'I, he's crazy, s'I--them's the very words I said.
-You all hearn me: he's crazy, s'I; everything shows it, s'I. Look at
-that-air grindstone, s'I; want to tell _me't_ any cretur 't's in his
-right mind 's a goin' to scrabble all them crazy things onto a
-grindstone? s'I. Here sich 'n' sich a person busted his heart; 'n'
-here so 'n' so pegged along for thirty-seven year, 'n' all
-that--natcherl son o' Louis somebody, 'n' sich everlast'n rubbage.
-He's plumb crazy, s'I; it's what I says in the fust place, it's what I
-says in the middle, 'n' it's what I says last 'n' all the time--the
-nigger's crazy--crazy 's Nebokoodneezer, s'I."
-
-"An' look at that-air ladder made out'n rags, Sister Hotchkiss," says
-old Mrs. Damrell; "what in the name o' goodness _could_ he ever want
-of--"
-
-"The very words I was a-sayin' no longer ago th'n this minute to
-Sister Utterback, 'n' she'll tell you so herself. Sh-she, look at
-that-air rag ladder, sh-she; 'n' s'I, yes, look at it, s'I--what
-_could_ he 'a' wanted of it, s'I. Sh-she, Sister Hotchkiss, sh-she--"
-
-"But how in the nation'd they ever _git_ that grindstone _in_ there,
-_anyway?_ 'n' who dug that-air _hole?_ 'n' who--"
-
-"My very _words_, Brer Penrod! I was a-sayin'--pass that-air sasser o'
-m'lasses, won't ye?--I was a-sayin' to Sister Dunlap, jist this
-minute, how _did_ they git that grindstone in there? s'I. Without
-_help,_ mind you--'thout _help! Thar's_ where 'tis. Don't tell _me,_
-s'I; there _wuz_ help, s'I; 'n' ther' wuz a _plenty_ help, too, s'I;
-ther's ben a _dozen_ a-helpin' that nigger, 'n' I lay I'd skin every
-last nigger on this place but _I'd_ find out who done it, s'I;
-moreover, s'I--"
-
-"A _dozen_ says you!--_forty_ couldn't 'a' done everything that's been
-done. Look at them case-knife saws and things, how tedious they've
-been made; look at that bed-leg sawed off with 'm, a week's work for
-six men: look at that nigger made out'n straw on the bed; and look
-at--"
-
-"You may _well_ say it, Brer Hightower! It's jist as I was a-sayin' to
-Brer Phelps, his own self. S'e, what do _you_ think of it, Sister
-Hotchkiss? s'e. Think o' what, Brer Phelps? s'I. Think o' that bed-leg
-sawed off that a way? s'e? _Think_ of it? s'I. I lay it never sawed
-_itself_ off, s'I--somebody _sawed_ it, s'I; that's my opinion, take
-it or leave it, it mayn't be no 'count, s'I, but sich as 't is, it's
-my opinion, s'I, 'n' if anybody k'n start a better one, s'I, let him
-_do_ it, s'I, that's all. I says to Sister Dunlap, s'I--"
-
-"Why, dog my cats, they must 'a' ben a house-full o' niggers in there
-every night for four weeks to 'a' done all that work, Sister Phelps.
-Look at that shirt--every last inch of it kivered over with secret
-African writ'n done with blood! Must 'a' ben a raft uv 'm at it right
-along, all the time, amost. Why, I'd give two dollars to have it read
-to me; 'n' as for the niggers that wrote it, I 'low I'd take 'n' lash
-'m t'll--"
-
-"People to _help_ him, Brother Marples! Well, I reckon you'd _think_
-so if you'd 'a' been in this house for a while back. Why, they've
-stole everything they could lay their hands on--and we a-watching all
-the time, mind you. They stole that shirt right off o' the line! and
-as for that sheet they made the rag ladder out of, ther' ain't no
-telling how many times they _didn't_ steal that; and flour, and
-candles, and candlesticks, and spoons, and the old warming-pan, and
-most a thousand things that I disremember now, and my new calico
-dress; and me and Silas and my Sid and Tom on the constant watch day
-_and_ night, as I was a-telling you, and not a one of us could catch
-hide nor hair nor sight nor sound of them; and here at the last
-minute, lo and behold you, they slides right in under our noses and
-fools us, and not only fools _us_ but the Injun Territory robbers too,
-and actuly gets _away_ with that nigger safe and sound, and that with
-sixteen men and twenty-two dogs right on their very heels at that very
-time! I tell you, it just bangs anything I ever _heard_ of. Why,
-_sperits_ couldn't 'a' done better and been no smarter. And I reckon
-they must 'a' _been_ sperits--because, because, _you_ know our dogs,
-and ther' ain't no better; well, them dogs never even got on the
-_track_ of 'm once! You explain _that_ to me if you can!--_any_ of
-you!"
-
-"Well, it does beat--"
-
-"Laws alive, I never--"
-
-"So help me, I wouldn't 'a' be--"
-
-"_House_-thieves as well as--"
-
-"Goodnessgracioussakes, I'd 'a' ben afeard to _live_ in sich a--"
-
-"Fraid to _live!_--why, I was that scared I dasn't hardly go to bed,
-or get up, or lay down, or _set_ down, Sister Ridgeway. Why, they'd
-steal the very--why, goodness sakes, you can guess what kind of a
-fluster I was in by the time midnight come last night. I hope to
-gracious if I warn't afraid they'd steal some o' the family! I was
-just to that pass I didn't have no reasoning faculties no more. It
-looks foolish enough _now_, in the daytime; but I says to myself,
-there's my two poor boys asleep, 'way upstairs in that lonesome room,
-and I declare to goodness I was that uneasy 't I crep' up there and
-locked 'em in! I _did_. And anybody would. Because, you know, when you
-get scared that way, and it keeps running on, and getting worse and
-worse all the time, and your wits gets to addling, and you get to
-doing all sorts o' wild things, and by and by you think to yourself,
-spos'n I was a boy, and was away up there, and the door ain't locked,
-and you--" She stopped, looking kind of wondering, and then she turned
-her head around slow, and when her eye lit on me--I got up and took a
-walk.
-
-Says I to myself, I can explain better how we come to not be in that
-room this morning if I go out to one side and study over it a little.
-So I done it. But I dasn't go fur, or she'd 'a' sent for me. And when
-it was late in the day the people all went, and then I come in and
-told her the noise and shooting waked up me and "Sid," and the door
-was locked, and we wanted to see the fun, so we went down the
-lightning-rod, and both of us got hurt a little, and we didn't never
-want to try _that_ no more. And then I went on and told her all what I
-told Uncle Silas before; and then she said she'd forgive us, and maybe
-it was all right enough anyway, and about what a body might expect of
-boys, for all boys was a pretty harum-scarum lot as fur as she could
-see; and so, as long as no harm hadn't come of it, she judged she
-better put in her time being grateful we was alive and well and she
-had us still, stead of fretting over what was past and done. So then
-she kissed me, and patted me on the head, and dropped into a kind of a
-brown-study; and pretty soon jumps up, and says:
-
-"Why, lawsamercy, it's most night, and Sid not come yet! What _has_
-become of that boy?"
-
-I see my chance; so I skips up and says:
-
-"I'll run right up to town and get him," I says.
-
-"No you won't," she says. "You'll stay right wher' you are; _one's_
-enough to be lost at a time. If he ain't here to supper, your uncle
-'ll go."
-
-Well, he warn't there to supper; so right after supper uncle went.
-
-He come back about ten a little bit uneasy; hadn't run across Tom's
-track. Aunt Sally was a good _deal_ uneasy; but Uncle Silas he said
-there warn't no occasion to be--boys will be boys, he said, and you'll
-see this one turn up in the morning all sound and right. So she had to
-be satisfied. But she said she'd set up for him awhile anyway, and
-keep a light burning so he could see it.
-
-And then when I went up to bed she come up with me and fetched her
-candle, and tucked me in, and mothered me so good I felt mean, and
-like I couldn't look her in the face; and she set down on the bed and
-talked with me a long time, and said what a splendid boy Sid was, and
-didn't seem to want to ever stop talking about him; and kept asking me
-every now and then if I reckoned he could 'a' got lost, or hurt, or
-maybe drownded, and might be laying at this minute somewheres
-suffering or dead, and she not by him to help him, and so the tears
-would drip down silent, and I would tell her that Sid was all right,
-and would be home in the morning, sure; and she would squeeze my hand,
-or maybe kiss me, and tell me to say it again, and keep on saying it,
-because it done her good, and she was in so much trouble. And when she
-was going away she looked down in my eyes so steady and gentle, and
-says:
-
-"The door ain't going to be locked, Tom, and there's the window and
-the rod; but you'll be good, _won't_ you? And you won't go? For _my_
-sake."
-
-Laws knows I _wanted_ to go bad enough to see about Tom, and was all
-intending to go; but after that I wouldn't 'a' went, not for kingdoms.
-
-But she was on my mind and Tom was on my mind, so I slept very
-restless. And twice I went down the rod away in the night, and slipped
-around front, and see her setting there by her candle in the window
-with her eyes towards the road and the tears in them; and I wished I
-could do something for her, but I couldn't, only to swear that I
-wouldn't never do nothing to grieve her any more. And the third time I
-waked up at dawn, and slid down, and she was there yet, and her candle
-was most out, and her old gray head was resting on her hand, and she
-was asleep.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XLII
-
-
-The old man was uptown again before breakfast, but couldn't get no
-track of Tom; and both of them set at the table thinking, and not
-saying nothing, and looking mournful, and their coffee getting cold,
-and not eating anything. And by and by the old man says:
-
-"Did I give you the letter?"
-
-"What letter?"
-
-"The one I got yesterday out of the post-office."
-
-"No, you didn't give me no letter."
-
-"Well, I must 'a' forgot it."
-
-So he rummaged his pockets, and then went off somewheres where he had
-laid it down, and fetched it, and give it to her. She says:
-
-"Why, it's from St. Petersburg--it's from Sis."
-
-I allowed another walk would do me good; but I couldn't stir. But
-before she could break it open she dropped it and run--for she see
-something. And so did I. It was Tom Sawyer on a mattress; and that old
-doctor; and Jim, in _her_ calico dress, with his hands tied behind
-him; and a lot of people. I hid the letter behind the first thing that
-come handy, and rushed. She flung herself at Tom, crying, and says:
-
-"Oh, he's dead, he's dead, I know he's dead!"
-
-And Tom he turned his head a little, and muttered something or other,
-which showed he warn't in his right mind; then she flung up her hands,
-and says:
-
-"He's alive, thank God! And that's enough!" and she snatched a kiss of
-him, and flew for the house to get the bed ready, and scattering
-orders right and left at the niggers and everybody else, as fast as
-her tongue could go, every jump of the way.
-
-I followed the men to see what they was going to do with Jim; and the
-old doctor and Uncle Silas followed after Tom into the house. The men
-was very huffy, and some of them wanted to hang Jim for an example to
-all the other niggers around there, so they wouldn't be trying to run
-away like Jim done, and making such a raft of trouble, and keeping a
-whole family scared most to death for days and nights. But the others
-said, don't do it, it wouldn't answer at all; he ain't our nigger, and
-his owner would turn up and make us pay for him, sure. So that cooled
-them down a little, because the people that's always the most anxious
-for to hang a nigger that hain't done just right is always the very
-ones that ain't the most anxious to pay for him when they've got their
-satisfaction out of him.
-
-They cussed Jim considerble, though, and give him a cuff or two side
-the head once in a while, but Jim never said nothing, and he never let
-on to know me, and they took him to the same cabin, and put his own
-clothes on him, and chained him again, and not to no bed-leg this
-time, but to a big staple drove into the bottom log, and chained his
-hands, too, and both legs, and said he warn't to have nothing but
-bread and water to eat after this till his owner come, or he was sold
-at auction because he didn't come in a certain length of time, and
-filled up our hole, and said a couple of farmers with guns must stand
-watch around about the cabin every night, and a bulldog tied to the
-door in the daytime; and about this time they was through with the job
-and was tapering off with a kind of generl good-by cussing, and then
-the old doctor comes and takes a look, and says:
-
-"Don't be no rougher on him than you're obleeged to, because he ain't
-a bad nigger. When I got to where I found the boy I see I couldn't cut
-the bullet out without some help, and he warn't in no condition for me
-to leave to go and get help; and he got a little worse and a little
-worse, and after a long time he went out of his head, and wouldn't let
-me come a-nigh him any more, and said if I chalked his raft he'd kill
-me, and no end of wild foolishness like that, and I see I couldn't do
-anything at all with him; so I says, I got to have _help_ somehow; and
-the minute I says it out crawls this nigger from somewheres and says
-he'll help, and he done it, too, and done it very well. Of course I
-judged he must be a runaway nigger, and there I _was!_ and there I had
-to stick right straight along all the rest of the day and all night.
-It was a fix, I tell you! I had a couple of patients with the chills,
-and of course I'd of liked to run up to town and see them, but I
-dasn't, because the nigger might get away, and then I'd be to blame;
-and yet never a skiff come close enough for me to hail. So there I had
-to stick plumb until daylight this morning; and I never see a nigger
-that was a better nuss or faithfuler, and yet he was risking his
-freedom to do it, and was all tired out, too, and I see plain enough
-he'd been worked main hard lately. I liked the nigger for that; I tell
-you, gentlemen, a nigger like that is worth a thousand dollars--and
-kind treatment, too. I had everything I needed, and the boy was doing
-as well there as he would 'a' done at home--better, maybe, because it
-was so quiet; but there I _was_, with both of 'm on my hands, and
-there I had to stick till about dawn this morning; then some men in a
-skiff come by, and as good luck would have it the nigger was setting
-by the pallet with his head propped on his knees sound asleep; so I
-motioned them in quiet, and they slipped up on him and grabbed him and
-tied him before he knowed what he was about, and we never had no
-trouble. And the boy being in a kind of a flighty sleep, too, we
-muffled the oars and hitched the raft on, and towed her over very nice
-and quiet, and the nigger never made the least row nor said a word
-from the start. He ain't no bad nigger, gentlemen; that's what I think
-about him."
-
-Somebody says:
-
-"Well, it sounds very good, doctor, I'm obleeged to say."
-
-Then the others softened up a little, too, and I was mighty thankful
-to that old doctor for doing Jim that good turn; and I was glad it was
-according to my judgment of him, too; because I thought he had a good
-heart in him and was a good man the first time I see him. Then they
-all agreed that Jim had acted very well, and was deserving to have
-some notice took of it, and reward. So every one of them promised,
-right out and hearty, that they wouldn't cuss him no more.
-
-Then they come out and locked him up. I hoped they was going to say he
-could have one or two of the chains took off, because they was rotten
-heavy, or could have meat and greens with his bread and water; but
-they didn't think of it, and I reckoned it warn't best for me to mix
-in, but I judged I'd get the doctor's yarn to Aunt Sally somehow or
-other as soon as I'd got through the breakers that was laying just
-ahead of me--explanations, I mean, of how I forgot to mention about
-Sid being shot when I was telling how him and me put in that dratted
-night paddling around hunting the runaway nigger.
-
-But I had plenty time. Aunt Sally she stuck to the sick-room all day
-and all night, and every time I see Uncle Silas mooning around I
-dodged him.
-
-Next morning I heard Tom was a good deal better, and they said Aunt
-Sally was gone to get a nap. So I slips to the sick-room, and if I
-found him awake I reckoned we could put up a yarn for the family that
-would wash. But he was sleeping, and sleeping very peaceful, too; and
-pale, not fire-faced the way he was when he come. So I set down and
-laid for him to wake. In about half an hour Aunt Sally comes gliding
-in, and there I was, up a stump again! She motioned me to be still,
-and set down by me, and begun to whisper, and said we could all be
-joyful now, because all the symptoms was first-rate, and he'd been
-sleeping like that for ever so long, and looking better and peacefuler
-all the time, and ten to one he'd wake up in his right mind.
-
-So we set there watching, and by and by he stirs a bit, and opened his
-eyes very natural, and takes a look, and says:
-
-"Hello!--why, I'm at _home!_ How's that? Where's the raft?"
-
-"It's all right," I says.
-
-"And _Jim?_"
-
-"The same," I says, but couldn't say it pretty brash. But he never
-noticed, but says:
-
-"Good! Splendid! _Now_ we're all right and safe! Did you tell Aunty?"
-
-I was going to say yes; but she chipped in and says:
-
-"About what, Sid?"
-
-"Why, about the way the whole thing was done."
-
-"What whole thing?"
-
-"Why, _the_ whole thing. There ain't but one; how we set the runaway
-nigger free--me and Tom."
-
-"Good land! Set the run--What _is_ the child talking about! Dear,
-dear, out of his head again!"
-
-"_No_, I ain't out of my HEAD; I know all what I'm talking about. We
-_did_ set him free--me and Tom. We laid out to do it, and we _done_
-it. And we done it elegant, too." He'd got a start, and she never
-checked him up, just set and stared and stared, and let him clip
-along, and I see it warn't no use for _me_ to put in. "Why, Aunty, it
-cost us a power of work--weeks of it--hours and hours, every night,
-whilst you was all asleep. And we had to steal candles, and the sheet,
-and the shirt, and your dress, and spoons, and tin plates, and
-case-knives, and the warming-pan, and the grindstone, and flour, and
-just no end of things, and you can't think what work it was to make
-the saws, and pens, and inscriptions, and one thing or another, and
-you can't think half the fun it was. And we had to make up the
-pictures of coffins and things, and nonnamous letters from the
-robbers, and get up and down the lightning-rod, and dig the hole into
-the cabin, and make the rope ladder and send it in cooked up in a pie,
-and send in spoons and things to work with in your apron pocket--"
-
-"Mercy sakes!"
-
-"--and load up the cabin with rats and snake's and so on, for company
-for Jim; and then you kept Tom here so long with the butter in his hat
-that you come near spiling the whole business, because the men come
-before we was out of the cabin, and we had to rush, and they heard us
-and let drive at us, and I got my share, and we dodged out of the path
-and let them go by, and when the dogs come they warn't interested in
-us, but went for the most noise, and we got our canoe, and made for
-the raft, and was all safe, and Jim was a free man, and we done it all
-by ourselves, and _wasn't_ it bully. Aunty!"
-
-"Well, I never heard the likes of it in all my born days! So it was
-_you_, you little rapscallions, that's been making all this trouble,
-and turned everybody's wits clean inside out and scared us all most to
-death. I've as good a notion as ever I had in my life to take it out
-o' you this very minute. To think, here I've been, night after night,
-a--_you_ just get well once, you young scamp, and I lay I'll tan the
-Old Harry out o' both o' ye!"
-
-But Tom, he _was_ so proud and joyful, he just _couldn't_ hold in, and
-his tongue just _went_ it--she a-chipping in, and spitting fire all
-along, and both of them going it at once, like a cat convention; and
-she says:
-
-"_Well_, you get all the enjoyment you can out of it _now_, for mind I
-tell you if I catch you meddling with him again--"
-
-"Meddling with _who_ Tom says, dropping his smile and looking
-surprised.
-
-"With _who?_ Why, the runaway nigger, of course. Who'd you reckon?"
-
-Tom looks at me very grave, and says:
-
-"Tom, didn't you just tell me he was all right? Hasn't he got away?"
-
-"_Him?_" says Aunt Sally; "the runaway nigger? 'Deed he hasn't.
-They've got him back, safe and sound, and he's in that cabin again, on
-bread and water, and loaded down with chains, till he's claimed or
-sold!"
-
-Tom rose square up in bed, with his eye hot, and his nostrils opening
-and shutting like gills, and sings out to me:
-
-"They hain't no _right_ to shut him up! _Shove!_--and don't you lose a
-minute. Turn him loose! he ain't no slave; he's as free as any cretur
-that walks this earth!"
-
-"What _does_ the child mean?"
-
-"I mean every word I _say_, Aunt Sally, and if somebody don't go,
-_I'll_ go. I've knowed him all his life, and so has Tom, there. Old
-Miss Watson died two months ago, and she was ashamed she ever was
-going to sell him down the river, and _said_ so; and she set him free
-in her will."
-
-"Then what on earth did _you_ want to set him free for, seeing he was
-already free?"
-
-"Well, that _is_ a question, I must say; and _just_ like women! Why, I
-wanted the _adventure_ of it; and I'd 'a' waded neck-deep in blood
-to--goodness alive, _Aunt Polly!"_
-
-If she warn't standing right there, just inside the door, looking as
-sweet and contented as an angel half full of pie, I wish I may never!
-
-Aunt Sally jumped for her, and most hugged the head off of her, and
-cried over her, and I found a good enough place for me under the bed,
-for it was getting pretty sultry for _us_, seemed to me. And I peeped
-out, and in a little while Tom's Aunt Polly shook herself loose and
-stood there looking across at Tom over her spectacles--kind of
-grinding him into the earth, you know. And then she says:
-
-"Yes, you _better_ turn y'r head away--I would if I was you, Tom."
-
-"Oh, deary me!" says Aunt Sally; "_is_ he changed so? Why, that ain't
-_Tom_, it's Sid; Tom's--Tom's--why, where is Tom? He was here a minute
-ago."
-
-"You mean where's Huck _Finn_--that's what you mean! I reckon I hain't
-raised such a scamp as my Tom all these years not to know him when I
-_see_ him. That _would_ be a pretty howdy-do. Come out from under that
-bed, Huck Finn."
-
-So I done it. But not feeling brash.
-
-Aunt Sally she was one of the mixed-upest-looking persons I ever
-see--except one, and that was Uncle Silas, when he come in and they
-told it all to him. It kind of made him drunk, as you may say, and he
-didn't know nothing at all the rest of the day, and preached a
-prayer-meeting sermon that night that gave him a rattling ruputation,
-because the oldest man in the world couldn't 'a' understood it. So
-Tom's Aunt Polly, she told all about who I was, and what; and I had to
-up and tell how I was in such a tight place that when Mrs. Phelps took
-me for Tom Sawyer--she chipped in and says, "Oh, go on and call me
-Aunt Sally, I'm used to it now, and 'taint no need to change"--that
-when Aunt Sally took me for Tom Sawyer I had to stand it--there warn't
-no other way, and I knowed he wouldn't mind, because it would be nuts
-for him, being a mystery, and he'd make an adventure out of it, and be
-perfectly satisfied. And so it turned out, and he let on to be Sid,
-and made things as soft as he could for me.
-
-And his Aunt Polly she said Tom was right about old Miss Watson
-setting Jim free in her will; and so, sure enough, Tom Sawyer had gone
-and took all that trouble and bother to set a free nigger free! and I
-couldn't ever understand before, until that minute and that talk, how
-he _could_ help a body set a nigger free with his bringing-up.
-
-Well, Aunt Polly she said that when Aunt Sally wrote to her that Tom
-and _Sid_ had come all right and safe, she says to herself:
-
-"Look at that, now! I might have expected it, letting him go off that
-way without anybody to watch him. So now I got to go and trapse all
-the way down the river, eleven hundred mile, and find out what that
-creetur's up to _this_ time, as long as I couldn't seem to get any
-answer out of you about it."
-
-"Why, I never heard nothing from you," says Aunt Sally.
-
-"Well, I wonder! Why, I wrote you twice to ask you what you could mean
-by Sid being here."
-
-"Well, I never got 'em. Sis."
-
-Aunt Polly she turns around slow and severe, and says:
-
-"You, Tom!"
-
-"Well--_what?_" he says, kind of pettish.
-
-"Don't you what _me_, you impudent thing--hand out them letters."
-
-"What letters?"
-
-"_Them_ letters. I be bound, if I have to take a-holt of you I'll--"
-
-"They're in the trunk. There, now. And they're just the same as they
-was when I got them out of the office. I hain't looked into them, I
-hain't touched them. But I knowed they'd make trouble, and I thought
-if you warn't in no hurry, I'd--"
-
-"Well, you _do_ need skinning, there ain't no mistake about it. And I
-wrote another one to tell you I was coming; and I s'pose he--"
-
-"No, it come yesterday; I hain't read it yet, but _it's_ all right,
-I've got that one."
-
-I wanted to offer to bet two dollars she hadn't, but I reckoned maybe
-it was just as safe to not to. So I never said nothing.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER THE LAST
-
-
-The first time I catched Tom private I asked him what was his idea,
-time of the evasion?--what it was he'd planned to do if the evasion
-worked all right and he managed to set a nigger free that was already
-free before? And he said, what he had planned in his head from the
-start, if we got Jim out all safe, was for us to run him down the
-river on the raft, and have adventures plumb to the mouth of the
-river, and then tell him about his being free, and take him back up
-home on a steamboat, in style, and pay him for his lost time, and
-write word ahead and get out all the niggers around, and have them
-waltz him into town with a torchlight procession and a brass-band, and
-then he would be a hero, and so would we. But I reckoned it was about
-as well the way it was.
-
-We had Jim out of the chains in no time, and when Aunt Polly and Uncle
-Silas and Aunt Sally found out how good he helped the doctor nurse
-Tom, they made a heap of fuss over him, and fixed him up prime, and
-give him all he wanted to eat, and a good time, and nothing to do. And
-we had him up to the sick-room, and had a high talk; and Tom give Jim
-forty dollars for being prisoner for us so patient, and doing it up so
-good, and Jim was pleased most to death and busted out, and says:
-
-"_Dah_, now, Huck, what I tell you?--what I tell you up dah on Jackson
-Islan'? I tole you I got a hairy breas', en what's de sign un it; en I
-_tole_ you I ben rich wunst, en gwineter to be rich _ag'in;_ en it's
-come true; en heah she _is! Dah_, now! doan' talk to _me_--signs is
-_signs_, mine I tell you; en I knowed jis' 's well 'at I 'uz gwineter
-be rich ag'in as I's a-stannin' heah dis minute!"
-
-And then Tom he talked along and talked along, and says, le's all
-three slide out of here one of these nights and get an outfit, and go
-for howling adventures amongst the Injuns, over in the territory, for
-a couple of weeks or two; and I says, all right, that suits me, but I
-ain't got no money for to buy the outfit, and I reckon I couldn't get
-none from home, because it's likely pap's been back before now, and
-got it all away from Judge Thatcher and drunk it up.
-
-"No, he hain't," Tom says; "it's all there yet--six thousand dollars
-and more; and your pap hain't ever been back since. Hadn't when I come
-away, anyhow."
-
-Jim says, kind of solemn:
-
-"He ain't a-comin' back no mo', Huck."
-
-I says:
-
-"Why, Jim?"
-
-"Nemmine why, Huck--but he ain't comin' back no mo'."
-
-But I kept at him; so at last he says:
-
-"Doan' you 'member de house dat was float'n down de river, en dey wuz
-a man in dah, kivered up, en I went in en unkivered him and didn' let
-you come in? Well, den, you kin git yo' money when you wants it, kase
-dat wuz him."
-
-Tom's most well now, and got his bullet around his neck on a
-watch-guard for a watch, and is always seeing what time it is, and so
-there ain't nothing more to write about, and I am rotten glad of it,
-because if I'd 'a' knowed what a trouble it was to make a book I
-wouldn't 'a' tackled it, and ain't a-going to no more. But I reckon I
-got to light out for the territory ahead of the rest, because Aunt
-Sally she's going to adopt me and sivilize me, and I can't stand it. I
-been there before.
-
-
-
-THE END
-
-
-
-
-
-End of Project Gutenberg's The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, by Mark Twain
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